Having an affair and thinking of leaving my husband. Thoughts?
Q. i have been married over twenty years and have cheated on my husband with another man that i have also known for over twenty years. during the course of my marriage i have been in and out of relationship with other man four different times. each ...
A. 3 January 2012: Its tough being married to someone for 20 years and loving someone else along the side. By now you know where your heart is. If your kids are grown I say go for it. I'm sure they are a good part of the reason why u stayed all this while. Loving and ... (read in full...)
Is she trying to make a move on my boyfriend?
Q. Hello aunts and uncles there's something about the relationship btw my bf and his close friend (let's call her J) that's bugging me. The other day I asked how his day out with J went and he told me that she said she loved him out of the blue. And it ...
A. 2 January 2012: Sweetheart, she is making a lot of moves on your bf and he enjoys the attention he gets from her. Tell him you can't put up with this any longer. If he still hesitates, dump him. If your guy he had any regard for you and your relationship he would ... (read in full...)
Could we ever go back to being bestfriends after I admitted my feelings for her?
Q. So a while ago my best friend asked me if I had feelings for her, I said I did. She had her suspicions because she thought I cared too much and came out and asked, and I answered truthfully. Before hand I knew she didn't like me that way because ...
A. 30 December 2011: Tell her you want to talk to her. Tell her she is still your best friend no matter what. She's avoiding you because she feels feelings are now involved. Tell her and show her you can handle your feelings because you didn't just start feeling like ... (read in full...)
How do I forget someone who meant so much and gave me so little reason?
Q. my ex after two years went home for a week, told me he wanted it over. that i could do better he wasn't what i needed. i replied lets wait well talk. we did the day after over text had it out. i said i can't cope put me out my misery i love you....
A. 27 December 2011: Not much you can do. The worst thing anyone can do is break up without a reason. Makes you wonder what you did wrongly. You didn't do anything wrongly (unless you've left some info out) he is the problem, he's the one with issues. I mean after two ... (read in full...)
I care for this man but he says he can't make me a priority
Q. I have a very very good male friend. We love spending time together. He loves my company a lot. whenever we both are free , we go on long drives and have exciting stuff. We do cuddle flirt and have intimacy. We both are really good. But he doesn't ...
A. 27 December 2011: He actually said it?! Stop caring for this man. He's 29. He's an adult - most times you're thinking 'is this guy really into me?' He has told plain and simple he just wants to use you. This question needs no thinking about. Its a no brainer. Leave ... (read in full...)
How do I get over the depression that sleeping with my ex has caused?
Q. I need to know how I can get over my ex and get out of the depression that he has put me in. We dated for over five years and broke up for good a year ago. We've slept once since then, and then again last night. He has really messed a lot of thing...
A. 26 December 2011: Nasty of him to have a gf and still be trying to sleep with you on and off. For starters you right it was your fault because somehow you were in his house drunk. You must never end up in his house again ever. STOP talking to this guy, cut him off - ... (read in full...)
FWB said I love you, then took it back?
Q. Today I was talking to my fwb when towards the end of the phone call he said "I love you". I immediately replied with "what" since it was such a shock and he repeated it. I said "no you don't" and said bye and hung up. A few minutes later he...
A. 22 December 2011: Well, I hope you like him because he has developed feelings for you. Some people are just dying to have their fwb fall in love with them. You didn't say how you feel about him. ... (read in full...)
Wife Cheated with my Cousin/Best Friend! Don't know what to do!!
Q. It's a little long. I apologize in advance. But there is so complicated. So confused and don't know what to do. I found out my wife cheated on me 1 year ago today. Needless to say, I was devastated and still am. Traumatized. For the first 10...
A. 17 December 2011: Why do people cheat? Possibly because they are in some way unhappy. Your case..... Known each other for 23 years is a longtime a huge plus and its also why finding out she's done this is so difficult to deal with. Excusable, no. Thing is as humans ... (read in full...)
I don't like my husband's female friend!
Q. Hi, My husband has a female friend I really don't like. The fact that we were dating and then living together, got married and just had a baby and I am just meeting her after almost 4 years really annoys me and frankly quit ticks me off. The fir...
A. 17 December 2011: I wouldn't either, if I was you. If she has been in his life so long there's gotta be something. Trust your gut feeling on this one. Talk to HIM. He's the one keeping her around if he didn't let her come so close, she'll have given him the much need... (read in full...)
I am cheating, but I want to stay with my boyfriend. Is that reasonable?
Q. a few years back i had this male best friend, (lets call him man A) we were unbelievably close and i started to get some feelings for him. it never really went anywhere until we had a drunken one night stand. time passed and i lost contact with ...
A. 12 December 2011: You want to eat your cake and have it ...... Okay let's see here if this thing with man A is a one time thing I will kind of understand but why are you planning on doing it a 2nd, 3rd and possibly a 4th time? You need to answer a few questions for ... (read in full...)
Fling I had at work is now totally ignoring me. I'm married but feel uncomfortable with things this way!
Q. I had a fling with a guy at my job for 2 years. He wasn't what I expected so we ended the relationship. It took awhile for him to go away because he was still calling and texting for six more months after. I have moved on and now pregnant and ...
A. 8 December 2011: You broke his heart and he's trying to deal with it. 2 years is sort of a long time to date someone and then opt out which was what you did. If your heart has never been broken then you'll never understand the pain you've caused and are still ... (read in full...)
Meeting an old flame after 21 years and still miss her as much....
Q. Hi I am 43 yrs old married happily with kids, recently due to face book i met my very old flame and we spoke a few time and decided to catch up in another country where i was traveling for work. We met up there and spent three beautiful days t...
A. 5 December 2011: If you've met twice in another country and there were no sparks, then.... You have me guessing. You haven't said what ur feelings are. There's gotta be a reason why you're agreeing to meet - I'm sure you're not lining up all your high school friends ... (read in full...)
I love him... But should I let him move on?
Q. I know this is long, but it's a good story. Well, my ex boyfriend and I have been friends for about 6 years and we dated for about a year and we broke up last May. First off I would just like to admit that I love him. I love him so much, and I can't ...
A. 18 November 2011: He should be allowed to date other people and so should you. It doesn't help that he has all these built up emotions he can't express. When he dates other girls it gives hom a clear perspective of what they're like, can compare in his head and help ... (read in full...)
My wife loves a 65 year old man!
Q. I'm 26, my wife's 26 also . we spend 3 years together Last night she said to me she had something to confess. I listened as she aadmitted to me she love some one a 65 -year-old man and that it was basically just she is crazy about him, and that 5h...
A. 17 November 2011: Absolutely ridiculous! At 26 how could she love a 65 year old man. Thing is, she's not 'in love' with him, but maybe getting the sort of attention she's been craving for from him and also he's doing it for her in the sexual department as well. ... (read in full...)
I thought he cared about me too but when I told him how he felt he hasn't been in touch
Q. So i am separated from my husband. And there is this guy i have been talking to and seeing. We have been friends for over 2yrs. We used to talk about everything and we grew such a connection while we were friends (all this happening while i was ...
A. 16 November 2011: Give him time to put his thoughts, feelings together so that he can make a decision. I think he likes you, but the pace is too fast for him. When he comes back, don't say anything about this, leave it up to him. You've said enough. The ball is now ... (read in full...)
How can I leave my husband without hurting my kids?
Q. I have been married 27 years to my high school sweetheart and we've had our good and bad times in our relationship. I've tried to leave multiple times through the years for different reasons but have no family and always felt alone and that I couldn...
A. 15 November 2011: You married your high school sweetheart for 27 years then all of a sudden you're in love with someone else. Well it has happened consciously or unconsciously and now you have to deal with it. You can't just leave because even you know the kids will ... (read in full...)
Do I go for a man who has long term suitability or one who I feel attracted to?
Q. In such a dilemma!! Im 23 and hav met a lad who is 25,get on so well with and he has a really good job, a nice car and would def be a good long term partner. I am attracted to him but not as much as a lad i work with and this is my problem, he is on...
A. 12 November 2011: Its always a wise decision since you're considering marriage to be with someone you're attracted to and have chemistry with. It goes a long way when the chips are down 10 years down the road. Then you want to think, this other person has better ... (read in full...)
A week after his wedding (not to me)...he's sleeping on my floor. HELP my head is frying ? What do I do next?
Q. Hi..I got friendly with a guy a few years ago. he was a single parent in a long distance relationship, we became friends..... I babysat the children, took them to school...grew to love all of them and we had some really fabulous 'family' times ...
A. 10 November 2011: What do you mean by, he's sleeping on your floor? Doesn't he have his own place, or is he having an affair with you? ... (read in full...)
I'm falling for him, how do I know if he feels the same?
Q. I've been friends with a guy for years. Lately, we can spend hours (literally, 12-13 hours at a time) just sitting and talking without noticing the time pass and then I don't want to go home. Everything makes me think of him. You can probably guess ...
A. 9 November 2011: You wouldn't know till you find out. Its not always easy for a lady to ask, but you will have to open up to him abit. Try hugging him when you are about saying goodbye to him next time. If you spend 12 hours chatting, he's attracted to you in some ... (read in full...)
Lovers for 5 years. Both married, but not to each other. How can I deal with this much pain? He said he loved me but where is he now?
Q. I starting having an affair with a man since 2006. We both are married and I lived a distance from him so I wasnt worried to get attached. Well I thought it would be just a short period this would last. We were together for almost 5 years. ...
A. 1 November 2011: This was a married man and you both knew you weren't going to divorce your partners. You should have had a limit to which you wanted to fall for him. Sounds like you fell in love with him and now that the inevitable has happened, you're hurting ... (read in full...)
How can I change my boring husband?
Q. its been 7 years when i got married. my marriage is like a rock. when we got some fight, we did 'nt talk for so long for about 3 months, is the worst..sometimes 1 month or less..my husband is a type of person that when you start talking, he will ...
A. 31 October 2011: Was he like this before you got married? Changing a person isn't an easy thing. When it comes down to his personality and the type of person he is, its either you leave him or accept him the way he is. Talk to him about it but I'm afraid you have a ... (read in full...)
He has promised history won't repeat itself, but it is already!
Q. I am 43,very very un-happily married and have been suffering due to lack of true love since 1987 i.e. from the age of 19.....I met this guy on the internet about a year back who is 25 years old.....He asked me to be his Lady Valentine on the eve of ...
A. 29 October 2011: Sounds like this guy only comes back when he needs something- possibly money (I may be wrong) He has disrespected you so many times. Don't allow it. Love is out there- May not be packaged the way you want, so you're probably going to need to change ... (read in full...)
Should we connect? Dont want to break his marriage but I need someone to make me laugh
Q. Thanks. I lost my hubby of 5 years a year and 2 month ago and i have 2 kids. just before i met my late hubby,i dated a guy i loved so much and i believed liked me for 3 months,i had to relocate some where far so we were not seeing but communic...
A. 29 October 2011: You're a widow and therefore available but he's married and so, unavailable. Yes you were in love a couple of years back but didn't end up together. If you're hubby were to be around, you really won't be thinking about him. He isn't picking your ... (read in full...)
I can't get over the emotional affair with a married man
Q. Hi everyone. I am having a really hard time getting over a married man. I am in an unhappy marriage and this is why I was vulnerable to him. He led me on and then disappeared from my life. I had true and deep feelings for him during our frien...
A. 25 October 2011: Ok, he's married and so are you; so what did you expect? Are you ready to leave your marriage? You didn't mention how long you've been married. You think its possible his wife found out. Then he's made his own choice. If its strictly an emotional ... (read in full...)
After patchup , do I own apology to my grilfriend?
Q. I think exactly 50 days back, I dumped my girlfriend who would yell at me like hell for small thing like why my room sounds like garbage with everything all over the place. Finally, I gave up and dumped her . We were together for 4 years and ...
A. 24 October 2011: You've made up. The gentlemanly thing to do is to apologize. If you're here asking if you should, then a part of you is thinking its the thing to do. But also tell her that she's going to have to put up with your room being like that (sometimes) ... (read in full...)
Is is possible to have a 4th c section if you want?
Q. Is it possible to have another baby after you have undergone three c sections - first one was an emergency and the child died a few days after birth, the second was an emergency though was awake and thankfully she is alive, third one was an elective ...
A. 22 October 2011: With you on this. Lost the first, had a girl then a boy, and all these through C-sections. I know I still want 1 more. I heard 5 is the limit but then its still advisable to always be in touch with your doctor on this issue. ... (read in full...)
Can women really be addicted to a man for the sex?
Q. Okay ladies, this is pretty sexual. What do you think of a man that is a, for lack of a better word, GOD in bed. Can women really be addicted to a man that can basically just give her absolute pleasure anytime, anywhere, all the time? Would cheating ...
A. 21 October 2011: Yes. But if he's attitude and way of treating women isn't good enough, no matter how 'Godly' the sex is, would be gone in 6 months ... (read in full...)
Does my best friend have feelings for me and should I make the move?
Q. Does my best friend have feelings for me and should I make the move? It seems like the timing is right as we are both in the same place in our lives. -Known each other for 5 years and for the first two years we both had feelings for each other a...
A. 20 October 2011: If he really is your best friend and you guys are always hanging out together, then its best to have this conversation so you know you're on the same page here. A straight forward guy would tell you outright what he's Intentions are. Hopefully, his ... (read in full...)
I thought I would enjoy having him play with my breasts, but I don't!
Q. this is so weird! i'm in a long distance relationship...but that's not what this question is about. when i visited my boyfriend last, we finally took the plunge and had sex. we gave our virginity to each other,so sweet right? but my question is ...
A. 1 October 2011: Perhaps he's not doing it correctly. If done right its definitely a turn on. Some guys use their teeth, which is just horrid; for some, the sucking is too intense which isn't it as well. It should be a gentle caress with the tongue along side ... (read in full...)
Nearly a year with him and he's never given me oral sex!
Q. ive been with my boyfriend nearly a yr and hes never given me oral sex!! he doesnt even talk bout it!! its the same old thing, nothing spontaneous we just watch tv go to bed, light goes off he gets on me does his business and says i feel better now ...
A. 29 September 2011: Some guys don't like giving oral. Talk to him about it and try to guide him to it. From what you've written your bf could be selfish in bed which means he may not want to go down on you. If he doesn't, then maybe you shouldn't give him oral as well. ... (read in full...)
Do you think he sees me as his girlfriend?
Q. so ive been sleeping with this guy for about 5 months and we do alot of things that couples do. we text and talk to each other everyday he invites me over to his house to just hang out. he has invtes me to go with him to his friends/ cousins. he has ...
A. 23 September 2011: So good to know this ended well :)... (read in full...)
Good guy, great morals, solid education, awesome personality, huge heart... and deathly afraid of commitment!
Q. Well... if you saw my other question, you'd understand the background of my situation, but.. from an outsider's point of view, here's my current situation... I love a guy to pieces and secretly cannot threaten the fact that I will move on if he do...
A. 23 September 2011: If this guy isn't in a relationship with you but is getting all the 'benefits' he would never commit. Give him space and tell him your schedule just got a lot tighter. Start connecting with other friends especially guys. This will do one of two ... (read in full...)
Should I have a baby with this married man?
Q. I have a serious question that I know will ruffle A LOT of feathers but I'm sorry, I really need advice, I've been seeing a married man for a while and were very close, best friends more than lovers. Recently I have been getting urges to have a ...
A. 18 September 2011: No Mademoiselle, it would not be realistic. ... (read in full...)
I don't have friends and don't want any. Is that wrong?
Q. I am 38 years old and I don't have any friends other than my wife. I have one friend from high school I see once in a great while. He always wants to meet up and do something, but I have no interest. I get along with my colleagues at work, but work...
A. 17 September 2011: Its ok to be a private person and not really want friends, but its also nice to have at least 1 other close friend - apart from your wife. Life is a stage and you just never know when you may need a helping hand from someone. I have learnt life ... (read in full...)
Long Distance Relationship or a dragged on Summer fling
Q. I am a 36 year old woman who met a 30 year old guy in April while we were both out of town on our own respective business. We happened to be staying at a common friend's house. I did not know him before. Sparks flew and we made out of three straight ...
A. 15 September 2011: I think he has taken this as a fwb situation. Yes he enjoys your company but this man is not ready to commit which is what you're looking for. I wouldn't advice talking with him especially not after that trip to your place and sending a 'checking in ... (read in full...)
My best friend's ex is in love with me. What should I do?
Q. What do I do? My best buddy's ex girlfriend is in love with me. I think she dumped him so she could be with me! The catch is, I actually really like her! But, I also like my best friend (not in a gay way of course). Idk what to do? She wants me to ...
A. 14 September 2011: Going with a friend's ex is bad but going with a best friends ex is just not cool. Even if he says its ok, I doubt you'll still be best friends. I'll pass on this one.... (read in full...)
He's my first, but all these other girls ...
Q. im 19/f and my boyfriend is 20/m we have been dating for nearly 4 months now, but to us it feels much much longer then that. We knew each other for 4 or so months before we even started dating, and back then, i fell for him the moment we met. ...
A. 14 September 2011: Sounds like he's all for you. He has a past you're going to have to accept and deal with. I don't think he's fwb is a problem that's why she's a fwb. He's moved on with you and she's having problems accepting it. Also I wouldn't make too much of an ... (read in full...)
Is my husband using me to be his nanny and housekeeper?
Q. I have been married to my husband for 6 years. we have two toddlers, one of whom is in preschool, the other one is too young still. I work part time in the evenings. My husband works days. I run the house, balance the checkbook, etc (I am in ...
A. 8 September 2011: With 2 kids you definitely need help at home. Discuss with hom there's no way you can combine house chores and work - you'll break down soon enough. So men don't see it, some don't want to see it. Seems to me you've done it all this time without ... (read in full...)
My husband insists nothing happened between him and his female friend, but I know he's lying
Q. Sorry for the length, needed to vent. I have been with my partner 9 years. He has a job that means he is away from home at least 1 night a week, but usually more. Late last year I became aware of a woman he had befriended (he felt sorry for her b...
A. 8 September 2011: Everyone lies about an affair because its totally wrong. He's going to deny until you lay it all out for him on the table. He may feel smart but guess what you're sharper than he thinks. Its totally wrong what he did, unforgivable and once a cheat, ... (read in full...)
Why is my mom so upset about the way my husband and I treat each other?
Q. Hello, I am a 31 year old married woman. You have given me great advice in the past. Here is my problem: This is a little long with background. My father and my husband get along great. My dad usually calls him, son, when he talks to him; ...
A. 7 September 2011: He loves you, you love him. The sex is great, you have 3 kids and wanting more. Forget about your mum and sister - they are a pain in the neck. From what I gather your marriage is near perfect. If they can't handle it, that's not your problem. ... (read in full...)
I'd been seeing a guy on and off for 3 years, now he says he wants to commit long term
Q. I asked him to try and put it into words how much he liked me: "Just trust me that it is a hell of a lot, we were so close for so long, how could that have not meant the world to me" Seems like there was nothing wrong.. I'd been seeing a guy o...
A. 5 September 2011: You've said it all. Should you risk the heartache? 3 years is a longtime for him to have stringed you along the sad thing is that you waited for so long. You didn't mention if you had dated anyone in that span of time. Do you really want to go thro... (read in full...)
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