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I've always found myself being the 'shoulder to cry on' in my little group of friends, and the role has grown on me. I like to help.
I like to think I have a healthy amount of common sense. I try to be practical when it comes to advice. I am currently in a long term, committed relationship, so I hope I know at least a little of what goes on when it comes to relationships - I seem to be doing alright so far. =)
I'm young - there are a lot of things I don't know, or have no experience with. But that is why I'm here - to learn, as well as to help. |
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| Latest articles: The language of fans - A solution to teenage drama?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
17 July 2008: After reading an abnormal amount of questions along the lines of "He looked at me, does that mean he likes me?!", I got to thinking about how much easier life could be if there was some sort of way we could communicate emotions without confusion. ...
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Dating for a year, how do I get her to realize I want to kiss her?
Q. me and my gf have been dating for a year now. i am 14 she is 13 . we have have been huging and holding hands my question is how do i make her want to kiss me but she does not know i want to help please....
A. 8 July 2008: Try building up to it. Next time you hug her goodbye or something, give her a peck on the cheek. See how she reacts to it - she might even reutrn it.
Alternatively, you could just ask her. Get her alone and get all cozy together, then just ask... (read in full...)
Do I tell my family about a sexual assualt?
Q. Should I tell my family about sexual assault? I have been sexually assaulted several times but sometimes by family members- recently by a bro that is not dna related. I don't want to get the family angry at me. Should I tell?...
A. 8 July 2008: I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you. And yes, you should definitely tell!!
Tell the family members that you trust, and tell the police. Sexual assault is a crime, and you are a victim. Who's to know how many other people they've done thi... (read in full...)
Why does my gf think she can do things but if I do it....she get's mad at me!!
Q. Why does it seem like my GF thinks she can do things but if i do the same thing its wrong or its ok for her to get mad about it? But if she does it its ok or if i get mad she turns it on me and gets mad.......
A. 8 July 2008: That depends on the situation. More details would be helpful.... (read in full...)
How do I make my gf kiss me?
Q. hi i am 14 and i want kiss my gf she is 13. how do i make her want kiss me? she does not know i want to kiss her. help plz ...
A. 8 July 2008: Well I guess it depends how long you guys have been going out, and how comfortable you are with each other. Is it all new and daunting, or are you at the cuddles and hand-holding stage? Understand that you can't MAKE her want to kiss you - although ... (read in full...)
How can I get him alone to ask me out?
Q. I know this waiter and he always goes out of his way to talk to me and my family. I think he is interested but he never ask me out yet. The last time we saw him we were not even in his section and he was off work but came over to talk he sat at the ...
A. 8 July 2008: Try going into the restaurant on your own, perhaps? Drop in for some lunch when you know he'll be working, or pop by when you know his shift will be ending and 'bump into him' as he comes out.
Or maybe slip him your number next time he comes to t... (read in full...)
Do guys like dry humping?
Q. Hi i was jst wondering-- is dry humping pleasurable for guys, b/c ive heard it can sometimes cause chafing? what are 'blue balls?'...
A. 8 July 2008: Not being male, I can't say for sure, but I know my boyfriend always enjoyed it with no complaints in the chafing department - at least not any that he told me.
'Blue balls' is when a guy is aroused but, for whatever reason, doesn't ejaculat... (read in full...)
Lost my virginity very young, got drunk at a party, should I tell my mom about both, I feel bad not doing so, please advise?
Q. I lost my virginity last year (early november 2007 when I was 13 1/2) to a guy who I had been hanging out with and was really close to for about 4 months. We never dated, just hung out a lot(he sort of led me on). My mom knew him and let him come ...
A. 7 July 2008: The great thing about mums is that they love you unconditionally, no matter how much of a scalliwag you might have been.
If you are really stressing about these things, it's best to talk to her about it. It's always good to be able to talk thin... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is so needy...
Q. I have a complicated relationship with my boyfriend. He always seems to be sad and disappointed that I can not spend time with him more than he would like. I told him the reason why I can not always spend time with him and I said that later on in ...
A. 7 July 2008: Don't let your sisters dictate who you can and can't see, or what you can and can't do. What business is it of theirs? There's a difference between protecting someone and being overly controlling.
It's not 'wrong' or 'inappropriate' if you want... (read in full...)
I don't know whether to dump him or keep him!
Q. I love my boyfriend ,but he never answers my calls.I've called him for a few days to make plans and go out.It seemed like he was ignoring me.He called today and said he never recieved any calls.I was pissed because he has caller ID and everything. I...
A. 7 July 2008: Denying phone calls, stupid comments, violent behaviour... he sounds like an immature little boy.
I'd lose him. You're still young, and there are plenty of other, decent lads out there.
... (read in full...)
What does he want when he moves my hand?
Q. during foreplay my boyfriend moves my hand towards his penis. What does he want? A full blown hand job or just some touching? If the latter in what way does he want me to touch him? ...
A. 7 July 2008: He doesn't necessarily want a hand job, although I'm quite sure he wouldn't object to one.
When you touch, rub or stroke a man's penis, it feels good for him - in the same way it does for a woman when an man fingers her or rubs her breasts. It's... (read in full...)
What will people think if they find out we're having sex?
Q. Me and my boyfriend wanna have sex, but we both are afraid of what people will think if they find out. Please, i need help....
A. 7 July 2008: You seem to know that people are going to disapprove of kids your age having sex - and that might be for a reason, don't you think?... (read in full...)
I'm mentally torturing myself and have images of him and someone else!
Q. Hi, here's my story; The guy i am talking about in this was my first serious boyfriend and first love and took each others virginity etc. We dated since our early teens but broke up after 3 years, after 2 year separation we got back together and have...
A. 4 July 2008: Ever hear the saying 'two wrongs don't make a right'?
As gabberjack has said, we all do things that we regret. To err is human. Your boyfriend needs to realize this. You were separated for two years - that is a fair while, and how were you to k... (read in full...)
What should I do? I don't want to be hurting either one of them.
Q. lets just say my name is Mac. now my problem started on September 8th when i met the one girl i loved. My first love in my life lets call her Mel. after we met we talked for a bit and became closer friends then we started dating on December 10th. ...
A. 4 July 2008: In this kind of situation, it's inevitable that someone is going to have their feelings hurt - it's not your fault, it's just how these things turn out. All you can do is try and make it as painless as possible.
You need to figure out where yo... (read in full...)
My boyfriend asked me how big/small his penis was compared to my exes. Does it really matter?
Q. My boyfriend asked me how big/small his penis was compared to my exes. when i said i didn't remember he said i was lying. so then i said fine, they were all smaller, then he was angry that i remembered what their penises looked like! why is he doin...
A. 4 July 2008: Try turning the table. Ask him how your boobs or your girly bits compare to /his/ exes.
All in all, I'd have to agree with q1605. He wants his ego stroked (among other things, probably), as well as making you feel bad in the process. He sounds like... (read in full...)
Is there anything I can say or do so that my b/f doesn't cheat on me while I'm gone?
Q. I'm going on vacation for a week and I'm wondering if there's anything I can say or do so that my b/f doesn't cheat on me while I'm gone. We both work together and I feel threatened by this other girl. Please help!!!...
A. 4 July 2008: Besides strapping the lad to a chair and locking him in a closet, there is no /absolute/ guarantee that he won't cheat - it's impossible to control the actions of others.
This is why trust is so important when it comes to relationships. You need... (read in full...)
Why would a guy have sex with a girl and not want her to be his girlfriend?
Q. If a guy doesn't want a girl to be his girlfriend but still wants to have sex with her, does that mean that shes ugly or doesnt have a good personality?...
A. 3 July 2008: No. It means the guy is a loser who wants some no-strings attached sex.... (read in full...)
Is it ok the take the morning after pill if I'm not pregnant?
Q. Hello everyone, My problem is that im kinda scared that I might be pregnant again the 1st time was with twins by a man that was 10 years my senior when I was 15 and had been date raped. Now im in a loving relationship with my highschool s...
A. 3 July 2008: No. The whole point of the morning after pill is that it's a 'just in case' sort of thing - by the time you knew if you were pregnant or not, it'd be too late to take it. It has been known to cause nausea and sickness, but besides that, you ... (read in full...)
I want to go back on the pill, but I'm not sure how to go about it.
Q. december last year i decided to go on the pill for a holiday as a celebration after finishing year 12. I went on it without my mum knowing but i had a bad experience with it. I had breakthrough bleeding which was very unpleasant, and even tho i was ...
A. 3 July 2008: Your mum will most likely be ok with it. Just sit her down and let her know that you want to go on the pill - give legitimate reasons, such as regular periods, protection from pregnancy, etc etc.
Your mum will also probably be able to direct you ... (read in full...)
I've had dreams about this boy I like, could they mean anything?
Q. There's this boy that I've liked for awhile now. Like, we actually had something so don't think that he's just some random kid that I stalk lol. I haven't seen him in like forever because he doesn't go to my school. But lately, I've been thinking ...
A. 3 July 2008: Dreams are basically the filing cabinet of the subconcious - while you sleep, your brain throws up images and thoughts that you may have been dwelling on. You mentioned thinking about this lad more often, so it's likely that he's going to make an ... (read in full...)
Is he just after a UK passport?
Q. i went to turkey a few weeks ago with my family. my sister who is 14 gave her msn addy to a bar man. when we got back he asked to marry her in a few years time. when she tries to explain she doesnt want to (by saying your too old for me, we hardly ...
A. 2 July 2008: It sounds pretty suspect to me. He met her what, once, twice? And now he wants to marry her? Definitely suss, especially since she's underage.
I'd say block him and be done with it.... (read in full...)
Are there any good websites I can use to determine if I have an STD?
Q. I want to know if I have a disease.Around my scrotum and the lower part of my penis are these "bumps".However they are at the base of my pubic hair and think that I have them because my hair is being pulled while I masturbate or because while I move ...
A. 2 July 2008: If you have never had sex, there's a very low chance you could have an STD - primarily because there has been no S to T the D.... (read in full...)
Am I a slut like everyone says or is this just a phase?
Q. During the outcome of this year, my life has brought me many different things, new experiences and alot of surprises. Alot of people are labeling me as a "slut", I am wondering, do you think the same? or is something else in my life effectin...
A. 2 July 2008: 'Slut' is such a godawful word.
At your age, you are very likely to find yourself attracted to a lot of different guys. It's probably to do with puberty and hormones and all of those fun things. The difference is whether you act on these feelings... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to my husband's younger brother and had sex with him. Why is this so wrong?
Q. I'm a married woman in my 20s, I really love my husband. He's in his 20s also. We have a great sex life. Even so, I've been attracted to his younger brother (also in his 20s) since before we got married. Recently, his brother and I got a little ...
A. 2 July 2008: Extramarital sex is generally frowned upon because when you marry someone, you promise to be faithful to them.
By sleeping with someone else, you are breaking the promise you made to your husband.... (read in full...)
How do I tell a girl how I feel about her?
Q. how do i tell a girl i like how i feel about her? i have no clue if she likes me like that or not i just want to tell her cause its hard not to tell her many thanks in advance...
A. 2 July 2008: The best way is to tell her dirctly, face to face. This way, you can gauge her response first hand - is she flattered, embarassed, happy?
Doing it this way also means she won't have to hear it through rumour and hearsay, where the facts can get ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for my vagina to make these noises?
Q. i have a huge problem, after i'm done having sex my vagina makes like a farting noise. What is it and is it normal? Also after the noise i cum. Is that normal?...
A. 2 July 2008: Did you ever have one of those little tubs of goo that made fart noises when you pushed it? Well, it's kinda like that.
When you have sex you get lubricated, air gets trapped, and it has to come out somewhere. It's perfectly normal.
I believe... (read in full...)
I need makeup tips to start the 8th grade!
Q. I really want to start wearing makeup. Like eyeshadow, mascara, eyeliner and lipgloss. I'm pretty sure my mom will approve because I'M GOING INTO 8TH GRADE!! ***I REALLY need LOTS of tips and advice!!!!*** PLEASE AND THANK YOU!!!!! xoxo...
A. 2 July 2008: The best advice I can give is this: LESS IS MORE.
Don't go wearing lipgloss, eyeshadow, mascara and eyeliner all at once because you'll look like a hussy, especially at your age.
As a young teenager, the most appropriate and flattering thing wo... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Over 600,000 visitors last month!
Q. Just a quickie We broke the 600,000 unique users/month (i.e. people!) last month. According to google analytics we had 638,310 visitors from June 1st to June 30th. Doesn't seem that long ago we passed the half a million mark. Thanks to all t...
A. 2 July 2008: Hooray!
Congratulations Andrew, and congrats to all the aunts as well. Not long until the million mark. =)
Keep up the good work everyone!... (read in full...)
How can I hint that I like him, and flirt a little?
Q. Hey... So there's this guy at my work who I have a bit of a soft spot for and last year he would always sort of flirt with everyone in the office (although he is married) and he flirted with me last year too. And that was after my "friend" went and...
A. 1 July 2008: Body language is key when flirting.
A good thing to remember is to touch - touch him on the arm, put an arm around him, give him hugs. Touching a guy is one of the biggest indicators you can give.
As well as this, make sure your body languag... (read in full...)
Is it safer to use 2 condoms?
Q. is it safer to use 2 condoms at a time?...
A. 1 July 2008: If you use it right and use lube, one should be sufficient. Two sounds like it would be uncomfortable.
If you want some extra protection, try going on the pill.... (read in full...)
My girlfriend complains that it hurts to shave "down there" but I don't want to go down on her if she doesn't!
Q. Hi, I have been dating my girlfriend for 8 months now and i have gone down on her twice. The first time i did it was the first time ive ever done it. So i liked it. But then te second time i realized that i didnt like it so much. Mainly because of ...
A. 1 July 2008: It really depends on how much shaving you mean - are we talking a tidy up here, or the whole scary Brazilian thing?
If it's just that the hair is too long, then perhaps a trim would be sufficient. I know a lot of women who prefer this method -... (read in full...)
Is 15 too young to fall in love?
Q. is 15 too young to fall in love? and to find the one you wanna spend the rest of your life with?..i know it would take lots of work and stuff but if you love the person you'll go through it all....
A. 1 July 2008: A lot of people will say that it is too young, and this is primarily because people change a lot through their teenage years - so it's quite possible that the person you love now will not be the same person in five or ten years time.
Don't go thin... (read in full...)
The condom came off inside me - is there any chance I could be pregnant?
Q. I had sex with my boyfrined on friday last and when we had finished we realised that the condom was off he said he is postive it didnt cme of until he pulled out and that he didnt even come he thinks...and the weird thing is when the condom came of ...
A. 1 July 2008: If you have your period, there is very very very little chance you could be pregnant.
if you're really worried, take a test a few weeks from now, but honestly, I wouldn't freat about it. Menstruation is a fairly good indicator of non-... (read in full...)
My boss and I are VERY attracted to one another, but he's married!
Q. i met a guy a year ago, we clicked instantly, then i found out he was part owner of were i worked and was kinda my manager as well, i had no idea at the time, and had made a pass at him ...he responded , but not a full on response. because of his...
A. 1 July 2008: He's right - getting involved would not be fair on his family or on you, and someone /will/ end up getting hurt.
I'd advise you to back right off this guy. If, at a later date, he divorces his wife, then you can make your move, but otherwise just... (read in full...)
He coming along way to visit me..should I 'put out" for him? I feel obligated..
Q. I've been on 3 dates with this a guy who lives 2hrs away from me. He's coming to visit me this weekend and staying over for a night. We get along really well and communicate via e-mail a lot. Am I expected to put out, since he's coming all the way ...
A. 27 June 2008: If he expects you to put out, he's not much of a gentleman. if you want to have sex with him, go right ahead and enjoy, but if you don't feel comfortable with it, then don't, even if you feel like you 'should'.... (read in full...)
My ex's new girlfriend is giving me grief, what do I do?
Q. OK I wan to know how to deal with my ex and his new evil jealous girfriend. This girl have been writing blogs and say real rude thing to me.I at frist like ok i dont care i aint go say noting, but (this is was on myspace) i did put up on my hea...
A. 27 June 2008: Don't bother getting into an argument with this girl. She obviously wants to provoke you, and you are letting her.
Fighting her will get you into trouble and will just make both of you look like silly little girls who get riled up over nothing.... (read in full...)
I don't hear from her now we've broken up, and it's bothering me.
Q. I know this may seem like a weird thing to say but...I broke up with my girlfriend about 3 weeks ago...and about a week ago...I haven't heard anything from her (by that I mean she hasn't been on my messenger) I don't want to sound worried but it's ...
A. 27 June 2008: Perhaps she has blocked you - she might not feel comfortable talking to you now that you have broken up.
Another alternative is that she has just been busy or left town for a bit.
I wouldn't fret about it.... (read in full...)
He says sweet dreams, is he flirting with me?
Q. hi again... like i said there this guy i like alot... i want to know if he is flirting with me.. well when we hang out on saturdays he hits me with rubber bands in areas if you know what i mean.. an he says sweetdreams an dreams about me. he is ...
A. 27 June 2008: Yes.... (read in full...)
Me and my girlfriend want to have sex, but we're unsure about some things.
Q. I am 12 and me and my girlfriend want to have sex but we don't know were or when....
A. 27 June 2008: I can answer the 'when' for you - When you are both MUCH older!
I doubt either of you is experienced or mature enough to be able to handle a sexual relationship. Wait, and just enjoy being young.... (read in full...)
Is he really cheating on me!??
Q. ok im going out with this one guy name john and i love him ! so much ive liked him sence the first day i saw him and i know he loves me back because his friends told me that he liked me alot and other stuff and when he asked me out it didnt seem ...
A. 27 June 2008: Seems like this John kid is messing you both about. He sounds like a knob and you should both dump him.
And as a side note, it's really not charming when you call your friends 'ugly'. Looks aren't the only reason to date a person.... (read in full...)
My mum wont let me stay the night at my boyfriends!
Q. how unfair is it to not let you'r 16 year old daughter stay at her boyfriends for one night? my mother wont trust me, even tho she was stayin over at my dads all the time when she was my age. she refuses me to stay over at my boyfriend. ho...
A. 27 June 2008: Don't act like you're so hard done to, it's not that big of a deal.
I'm 18 and my mother doesn't like me staying over at my boyfriend's, so I don't.
Your mother is just doing what she feels is best for you. She knows that if you are sleeping... (read in full...)
I want to use tampons for the first time and need some advice
Q. I'm 13 and I really want to try using tampons. I've had my period for 1 year and a half and I'm ready to switch to tampons now. I find pads annoying. I'm going on a camping trip soon and by then it'll be my time of the month! I don't want to use ...
A. 27 June 2008: They aren't that scary, and I personally worship them as a lifesaver.
There is not that much variation when it comes to type. You have your light, regular and heavy varieties - you simply choose depending on your flow. So far as brands go, they... (read in full...)
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