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*hats_not_my_name agony aunt

*hats_not_my_name

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hey! basically i'm a 15 year old girl, lives in the UK, loves music, plays bass, loves her friends and family and is very very confused about what she wants atm! but more importantly i really like helping people. i'm only young but i still like to think that i can still give some useful advice! i've answered a few questions anonymously on this site but i decided to create an account when i was the one who needed some help! so yeah, i'm here to help! and thank you in advance to anyone who answers any of my questions. i would love to talk to anyone who has been through similar experiences to me so message me if you want :)

Why doesn's she like giving me head and swallowing?

Q.   My girlfriend and I have a pretty healthy sex life, we have sex at least once a day or ever couple of days and enjoy it. I go down on her every day at least, or whenever she wants it, and make her orgasm by licking her, she says she loves it. But ...

A.   23 November 2008: hey! was she the one who told you that she did it with her exs? or have you just heard from somewhere else? she may have talked about it like it wasn't a problem cos she was embarassed that she doesn't like giving head...or maybe she was worried ... (read in full...)

Pupil/Teacher crush!

Q.   Okay I'm sorry to say this but I have the typical female teenage problem. I'm 15 (Nearly 16) and in love with my teacher. Please don't think I'm some silly, naive, clueless little girl because I'm not. I know I have no chance with him whatsoe...

A.   19 October 2008: hi! you sound a lot like me. i was in love with my teacher for just over a year and i was just as obsessed as you, so know that you are not alone. you seem like you have a sensible attitude towards this, you know that nothing can happen and that it ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend pushes the limits when I am not ready. Am I too harsh to him?

Q.   My boyfriend (hes a few years older then mke) wants to go all the way when I wasn't ready. I did talk to him at least two times but he kept (he would tried an grabbed one of my breats we were in his car. I would him off)on doing it. Then one when we ...

A.   26 August 2008: hey! no i don't think it was harsh at all. this guy has no respect for your feelings or your body and is sooooo not worth your time! i suggest you get rid of him and find someone who appreciates you for who you are. he'll soon realise what a mistake ... (read in full...)

Poll Question: Would you rather hear a lie that brought a smile or a truth that brought a tear?

Q.   im curious.. which would you rather?.... poll question :) a lie that brings a smile? or the truth that brings a tear?...

A.   26 August 2008: surely the truth as even if the lie made you smile at the time, to find out you were betrayed could bring tears. ... (read in full...)

Should I tell my best friend's mum that she hurts herself?

Q.   hi everyone i need some advice obviously my very good freind has recenly started cutting her self and she makes me very worried ....should i tell her mom ? or should i leave her alone?thz alot,me!...

A.   25 August 2008: hey! this is a very sensitive issue, i've seen some of my friends go through periods of self-harming and it's so hard to see, so i feel for you there. have you tried talking to your friend about why she feels the need to self-harm? it's a ... (read in full...)

I want to get him a special gift for our 1-year anniversary, but I am short of money! Any ideas?

Q.   ive been with my boyfriend for almost a year now. we arnet engaged or anything but it is pretty serious. its coming up to out 1 year anniversary so i wanted to get him something special,, only thing is i have financial prblems and so dont really ...

A.   23 August 2008: hey! whenever i have 2 get someone special a gift when i don't have money i either frame a picture of us together and maybe you could get a frame tht you could decorate? or you could get a notebook and make him a scrapbook of all the special times ... (read in full...)

My parents are so confusing and they shelter me!

Q.   Ok,I am 13 years old,just of last month.My parents are so overprotective of me.Mostly my dad,but I think my mom feels like she has to agree with everything he says,but she is protective of me sometimes,on her own. For example,one time,dur...

A.   23 August 2008: hey! i understand tht this must be frustrating for you. you want to start to get some independence and do your own thing like most teenagers. i expect tht your parents are finding hard to except tht you're growing up. are you an only child? cos the ... (read in full...)

Am I paranoid about having a crush on her?

Q.   I don't even know her name.. I'm only 15 and know that it will take some time to figure out my true sexuality- but its darn annoying!! i go to a all girls school and i have a -what i think is a crush? I feel like a see this girl everywhere i g...

A.   17 August 2008: hey! dw all your feelings are perfectly normal. i wish i could give you a sure fire way to get over a crush, but there reli isn't one! however, try to keep your self busy, push this girl to the back of your mind. maybe join a club or get a new hobby ... (read in full...)

I just want some advice from some ladies that know what to do and help me get round these problems with my gf

Q.   Dear Cupid I have a chat moment with my girlfriend coming up. Its something not good. Shes getting frustrated with me. I got her upset about a board game time. I have a thing called Asbergers syndrome and she knows it. I don't think she knows ev...

A.   17 August 2008: hey! my bro has autism (though a lot more severe than yours!) however i've come into contact with a lot of ppl with the same sorts of problems as you, so i understand a bit about your problems. asberger's is a hard syndrome to live with and your gf ... (read in full...)

What do women find attractive in a man???

Q.   What do women find atractive in a man? I want your opinion, thanks to those of you who answer, its well appreciated....

A.   16 August 2008: well, looks wise i like all sorts of guys! i don't mind blond or brown hair or whatever colour eyes (though i do have a soft spot for blue!) i don't find really big muscles or six packs particularly attractive tbh..though i like fairly slim guys. ... (read in full...)

What are your thoughts on why teenagers want to have sex before 18 years of age?

Q.   Okay okay, I've been reading a lot of the questions lately and i keep wondering why teengers under the age of 18 want to have sex soo badly? Hey im 13 has a 14yo bf that wants to have sex he understands the wait.....but still, WHY HAVE SEX BEFORE 18 ...

A.   14 August 2008: i guess it's like the 'forbidden fruit syndrome', ppl r like i'm nt supposed to do it, which makes it more exciting. i dunno tho, maybe it's just purely down to hormones. all i know is in this last year, my hormones seemed to have kicked in and i've ... (read in full...)

I'm taking a blood test soon, but I'm terribly afraid of needles. Help me!

Q.   Ok, I know this isn't a romantic question, but I really need some help about this. First, I'm terribly afraid of needles. I can stand the sight of one but once I see one I start thinking on how it will go into my arm and then many horror images wo...

A.   14 August 2008: ooo i just thought of another thing plan a treat for yourself which you can do after the blood test as a reward for getting through it, like a night out with your friends or a pamper session or something. my mum used to do it with me when i was ... (read in full...)

I'm taking a blood test soon, but I'm terribly afraid of needles. Help me!

Q.   Ok, I know this isn't a romantic question, but I really need some help about this. First, I'm terribly afraid of needles. I can stand the sight of one but once I see one I start thinking on how it will go into my arm and then many horror images wo...

A.   14 August 2008: hey! i don't like needles either, in fact seriously who does? the person who's doing the blood test will have seen it all before, so try not to feel embarassed. when i had to go have a blood test, my doctor suggested that i used some cream that ... (read in full...)

Help! My parents are splitting up.

Q.   Help my mum and dad are splitting up. Dad lost his job and things have gone down the hill since. They have no savings cos theyve been spending it on stuff they don't really need. Thats all they think about, what they can have next and what the peop...

A.   13 August 2008: hey! aww hunny i wish i could just hug you right now! this is such a horrible thing for you to have to go through. i've never personally experienced it so i can only imagine what you are going through, but a lot of my friends have parents who are ... (read in full...)

Do I go out with my exboyfriend to get over my feelings for my best female friend?

Q.   Hey, About 3 months ago I broke up with my boyfriend after we had sex for the first time. We were (and still are) 15, and I felt it was too much too young. I also had another worry, as I was completely in love with my best female friend. She know...

A.   13 August 2008: hey! hmm.. this is a tricky one! well i would say, don't let your feelings for your friend stop an other potential relationships, i don't know how long she has known about your feelings for, but she hasn't acted on them, which may mean she does not ... (read in full...)

Am I desperate to like someone? Is this why I have turned to this guy?

Q.   hey i'm sorry as this is my second question this month but i would really appreciate some advice. it's another long question (or equation lol spirit _of_iona!) but here goes. i have this guy friend who i've known for all my life as our fathers' ...

A.   12 August 2008: hey everyone ty sooo much for the advice! i've been going over this in my mind for a couple of days and i think i'm going to see how things go when i go to see him (that way i get a chance to check i really do like him!) if the right opportunity ... (read in full...)

How do I get over my crush on a teacher?

Q.   Recently, I have transfered to another school due to financial reasons. At first, I was not too hyped about the idea, because I was going into my last year and didn't want to leave my old friends. A few months flew by, and I was into it. Howe...

A.   12 August 2008: hey! i can totally relate to how you feel, when you love a teacher, you know you should just get over him, but it's hard to let go. don't worry about your feelings, they are perfectly natural and normal. now that you've transferred schools you ... (read in full...)

I haven't seen my boyfriend all summer. Should I run over and kiss him when I see him? I'm 12 years old by the way.

Q.   Hi, I'm 12 years old, and I'm going into 7th grade soon. The thing is, I haven't seen my boyfriend ALL summer. And I miss him terribly. I have a slight chance of seeing him when he gets back, but I dunno if I will. I was wonderng, what should I when...

A.   11 August 2008: hey! well maybe you shouldn't kiss him straight away that might freak him out! not fully anyway, i'm sure on the cheek would be fine. just say how much you missed him and how glad you are that he's back home and see what happens. you'll have you ... (read in full...)

Being a teenager is hard, with growing pains and other stuff, why is it that adults think it is so easy?

Q.   why is it that adults think being a kid is so easy? i mean they lecture you about how good their childhood was but they can never accept the fact that we are not perfect... not like they were..i think they should spend a day being a teenager with ...

A.   11 August 2008: hey! i know what you mean, sometimes i get so frustrated when adults say kids have no problems! i think adults say that because they have things to worry about that we haven;t experienced yet such as taxes and bank statements and other boring things ... (read in full...)

How do I get to meet boys when I have no friends living close?

Q.   hi there, okay so i am a 15yr old girl. I havnt had a boyfriend or even been kissed yet :( Like you watch films and read books and that with romance and whatever in it, and it just makes you feel you want to have a boyfriend - however sad that...

A.   10 August 2008: hey! well first of all you are not alone on the whole 'never been kissed' thing....i'm 15 and i've never been kissed either! i have very few friends who are boys and the only one i vaguely like lives far away! so i feel your pain! maybe there are ... (read in full...)

Does my teacher like me? I think he's sending signals.

Q.   Hello i'm in a bit of a predicament. This is of coarse one of those teacher student situations. I know so many people on here are in these, more girls than boys. And i'm sorry to put you through the same old question, and yes. OK my name's Ashlei...

A.   10 August 2008: hey! at this stage, i don't think you need to worry to much, it just sounds like you are one of his favorites. my friend gets similar treatment off one of my teachers and it's just because she's really clever and enthusiastic (lol what a nerd!) so ... (read in full...)

Why are horrible people happier?!

Q.   at school there is this one girl who is centre of attention. shes pretty and popular. however, she is downright mean. the other day she thought it would be funny to spill a cup of hot chocolate into my desk that had some of my belongings. i knwo she ...

A.   9 August 2008: hey! i can think of a few girls at my school who are like this; complete (insert swearword here!) who do horrible things to people for no reason. and you know what? they are just a waste of space and the only reason they act like this is because ... (read in full...)

How can I convince her that I am a nice guy?!

Q.   Hey I am a 15 year old male and I am feeling really low because i really like this girl but she will not go out with me, because i have ony had 2 other girlfriends. What can i do to make her see that im a nice guy even though i have not had m...

A.   8 August 2008: hey! i know this isn't what you want to hear but i'm gonna have to agree with emilyanswers. if this girl refuses to go out with you due to 'lack of experience' then she's so not worth it! just try and forget her and find a girl who likes you no ... (read in full...)

Should I change the way I am so I feel better about myself or what?

Q.   hi.. i'm very self conscious of myself. i dress myself and act myself and stuff, but when i'm around other people i just get upset. it's like everyone looks at them and i'm just there, and i feel like people would just make fun of me. when people ...

A.   6 August 2008: hey! i think everyone feels insecure sometimes..i know i do! but something that's important to remember is that sometimes the people who are loud and confident act like this because they feel just as insecure as you. also being the centre of ... (read in full...)

Why do I like my friend when she continues to hurt me?

Q.   ok sorry this is quite long and a bit complicated..but here goes! I used to be good friends with a girl two years below me who gets on my bus...let's call her A. A used to hang out with my group of friends last year, as she fell out with some of...

A.   5 August 2008: hey everyone ty for the advice (though tbh spirit of iona i'm nt sure i understood all the long words!) i've decided that my friendship with A is nothing compared to my closeness with my best friend so i will take her side. however, i won't cut A ... (read in full...)

I'm too scared to talk to my mum about periods/boobs and so on. Help!!

Q.   I am 11, and 2 of my friends have started ther periods, the say that they asked their mum's about gettin boob's, problems 'down below' and all that.. but i feel i cant! I want to ask her about why I fancie like 5 boys in my class, and about periods ...

A.   5 August 2008: hey! growing up is sooo confusing and you'll probably have loads of questions you want to ask. if you don't feel comfortable asking your mum, then maybe there is someone else you can ask, who's older than you e.g. a cousin or older sister or aunt? ... (read in full...)

He wants to have sex, I want to wait until I marry, he said he will wait as well, I am wondering if his desires should take precedent over mine, will he dump me because of this, please help me?

Q.   My boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 2 yrs..we have talked about sex...i told him i want to wait until i am married...he said that he will wait with me then...but i can tell he wants to but i am only 16 and i don't. I want my first time to ...

A.   5 August 2008: hey! of course you are not a bad gf for not wanted to lose your virginity! you definetly have the right to say you don't want to, this boy doesn't own you! some of the young girls on here should follow your example, it's very sensible to want to ... (read in full...)

Students Falling in love with Their Teachers can really hurt? Your Opinions?

Q.   Students look up to teachers because they're smart. They are mature. They're possibly good looking. They've had interesting lives. All the things all people look for in a character. But students can't do anything about it. ...

A.   4 August 2008: i think you hit the nail on the head! this is exactly the sort of thing students who fall in love with their teachers go through (i should kno, i'm one of them!) i think the biggest thing that has helped me through the hurt and the pain (because ... (read in full...)

Loving my PE teacher is killing me....will the pain ever end??

Q.   Okay..so lets get it started... I'm 15 years old and about to go into yr 11 however since yr 8 i've been in love with my female pe teacher! I love her so much and would do anything to b with her, but she has a bf already =[. I've told my mates and ...

A.   3 August 2008: hey! oh my gosh this pain sounds very familair indeed! unrequited love for a teacher.....absoulutly sucks doesn't it? well first thing i'll say is you are not alone! i've been in love or obessesed or whatever you want to call it with my physics ... (read in full...)

Poll: When did you have your first kiss and the first relationship?

Q.   Hey just a quick thing. Can you guys/girls tell me when you had your first kiss and when you first had a boyfriend/girlfriend? I'm 16 and never been kissed, never had a boyfriend, nothing. Just wanna know when you guys/girls had your f...

A.   2 August 2008: lol i've never had a bf either or been kissed! well tht's nt strictly true...i had a bf in yr 6 but you kno how it is when your 10...it's nt a real relationship! and i was kissed in a game of truth or dare (also in yr 6) by a boy but it lasted for ... (read in full...)

She says she will leave me if I don't buy her gifts. So should I continue to buy her more things?

Q.   Hey I am 15 and i have a girlfriend who is 19. She has a job and lives with her parents. I am in school my girlfriend scemms to like me for all the things that i buy her. I have been buying her iPods and laptops and all that. At the mom...

A.   31 July 2008: hey! look i don't wanna sound harsh but it's sounds like this girl is using you. she is being completly unfair treating you this way and toying with your emotions in this way! you don't deserve her! you sound like such a nice guy and my advice is ... (read in full...)

My best friend calls me a "cradle robber" because I like a boy a year younger than me, but I need help to approach him.

Q.   ok so i really REALLY like this boy ALOT! im 14 almost 15 and hes 13 almost 14. but im in 10th grade and hes in 8th. it was hard enough for me to tell my bff that i had fallen for him. but she is totally against it! she even calls me a kerd ...

A.   25 July 2008: hey! your best friend is being very insensitive in my opinion...if you really like this boy then i say go for it! yes there is an age difference, but in no way would you two having a relationship be sick or wrong, if you both genuinely love and care ... (read in full...)

If you love your teacher should you leave them alone and let them go?

Q.   My friend is loving this teacher and i don’t she’s gay but she’s obsessed with her…and the teacher has just left and she’s just depressed and heartbroken.. She’s asking me if you love a teacher should you Let Them go??? Please post your tho...

A.   22 July 2008: hey i can totally relate to what your friend is going through right now.....i'm 'slightly' obessesed with my physics teacher and i don't have him next year! i'm sooo upset about this and it really hurts...but you've just got to let it go. it's the ... (read in full...)

I just want to kiss him but stay safe.... can I catch his STI?

Q.   ok im 13 and i like this boy and he is 14. He's not a virgin and i am. He wants to have sex with me but im not losing my virginity at this age because im too young. There's only one problem i think he has clamidia because that's what everyone is ...

A.   16 July 2008: hey! first of all well done on your mature decision not to lose your virginity yet. secondly, this whole chlamydia thing could well be just a rumour....do you personally have any reason to believe he has it? if you do, you may want to encoruage him ... (read in full...)

Should I tell her if her relationship ends or just forget about it as my group could see me as weird?

Q.   (sorry that this is quite long)OK well i go to an all girls school but we have a boys school next door.I have fancied loads of boys and this is the first time i have had a crush on a girl. Recently i have realised i have a crush on one of my bes...

A.   14 July 2008: hey! although i've never been in this situation before, some of my friends have and i would warn you to be careful. i go to an all girls school too and last year two of my close friends went out with each other after deciding that they were bi which ... (read in full...)

Is anybody NOT cheating?

Q.   Does anyone know TRUTHFULLY of any couples who have never cheated on their partners of say over 5 years in a relationship. I despair all my friends are saying their partners are cheating not jsut the men women too. Is anyone faithful these days ...

A.   14 July 2008: yeah my parents lol and all my aunts and uncles! thats 5 couples...but i can see your frustration...no one seems to stay together these days! ... (read in full...)

When will my periods start? Brown discharge!

Q.   Hello, I am 14 and have had a discharge and pubic hair for about 2 years now and I am 10 stone. My boobs are small but so are most others in my family. I haven't started my periods yet but today I got a heavy brown discharge! It doesn't smell or...

A.   14 July 2008: don't worry this all sounds very normal! have you been getting any other symptoms? (cramps etc) even if you haven't, it sounds like your period has started. you should talk to someone about it (it doesn't have to be your mum.....any family member or ... (read in full...)

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