Boredom during sex - am I normal to feel this?
Q. i think i am not normal help...while having sex with my boyfriend i always just want him to cum and finish fast i am always getting bored and i feel he takes forever to cum...and veryyyyyyyyyyyyy rarely do i cum..why is this...
A. 11 January 2008: Have you been faking orgasms? Does your boyfriend realize that he isn't giving you the kind of pleasure you enjoy? Is it just a kind of tacit agreement between the two of you? He isn't a mind reader. If you continue to submit to boring-ass sex (not ... (read in full...)
Another boy is also interested in the girl I fancy, how should I react?
Q. I fancy this girl so much but found out some other boy fancies her too. I don't know what to do!!!! He's always flirting her but she seems to talk to me more.I'm not prepared to ask her out yet. Everytime I see them I feel like breaking his legs I ...
A. 11 January 2008: You don't really have any more "rights" to her time than this other boy, and furthermore, even if you were going out, you'd need to be stable enough to let her be in the company of other men on a regular basis. If she is indeed talking to you more, ... (read in full...)
Taking care of my wife's mental and physical problems, I needed a holiday. During the travel I fell in love with a woman, but I don't agree with affairs. Confused!
Q. I have been in a relatinship for 18 years, for most of which I have been looking after my partner for both mental and sever physical illness. Although she is now semi recovered I am very tired both physcally and emotionally. We also have a two year...
A. 21 December 2007: After dealing with the saga of your wife's personal problems, any woman you meet would certainly appear far more tantalizing. Think about it - even though you felt some kind of special connection with this other woman, you couldn't possibly have ... (read in full...)
I certainly don't want to lose his friendship but how can I find out diplomatically if he is gay or not?
Q. I need some good advice! I'm a gay 58 year old male who is quite attracted to a young 23 year old guy. We've been friends ever since he was a little fellow. I believe he is gay but I'm not 100% positive about it. We're planning to take a trip ...
A. 11 August 2007: All I can say is - DON'T ASK DURING THE TRIP. It would just be painful to be stuck with him if it, for whatever reason, went badly. If you two really are such special friends, he'll let it slip out sooner or later. You can just be patient in the ... (read in full...)
How can I start to think for myself and stop being so influenced by my mother?
Q. Hi - I wonder if anyone could help. My mother recently told me that she got very hurt in her teens (she is now 62) because she found out her mother (my grandmother who is no longer alive) had an affair. Her father never found out and she never ...
A. 11 August 2007: This is the kind of problem which may be beyond the scope of a short blurb of advice.
Your mother (for various reasons) has impressed a very rigid moral rectitude on you, to the point where it ceases to be a moral compass and becomes a cage. Wh... (read in full...)
How can I let people know that I want to hang out and party with them, without looking needy and lonely????
Q. Why is it that whenever I go hang out with people, they always seem like they're having a blast with me and call me to hang out again, then if I say no the first time, they never call me back? How can I let people know that I want to hang out and ...
A. 11 August 2007: It takes 2 to tango. If you really want to go out with these people, you can't always rely on them to make the first move. Calling people up to hang out and party doesn't make you seem desperate and needy - did you find it desperate and needy when ... (read in full...)
Why does he act so childish sometimes and blow things all out of proportion?
Q. I'm in a relationship right now (7 months to be exact) and he's a great guy. However, he acts really childish sometimes, and I don't mean immature as in farting in front of me or making lame jokes. He acts very "high school/puppy love" (no ...
A. 11 August 2007: You may be able to deal with his slightly more volatile personality if you resolve to be a little more stoic. Think back - in these instances where he gets too theatrical, or blows something out of proportion, how long does it ever last? If his ... (read in full...)
Is viagra safe for an 18 year old?
Q. I want to have longer sex with my gf. I don't need viagra but i think that using it will prolong the time that we do it for giving the girl a better time. Is this safe to use as I am only 18?...
A. 10 July 2007: Viagra is just a catalyst to get and maintain your erection. Unless that's the reason you can't have sex as long as you want, Viagra will just be an expensive placebo for you.
The problem is more likely you climax faster than you want. If that's t... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to stop spying on me?
Q. My boyfriend of 1.5 yr won't stop spying on me. He takes my cell phone without my knowledge and reads texts, goes through my recent calls. We have an otherwise great relationship. I want him to trust me. I have done nothing to betray him, yet ...
A. 8 July 2007: Dump him. That crap isn't acceptable. He'll probably beg you to take him back and he'll smarten right up if you do.
I know this seems heavy-handed, but you need to make a strong statement that will stay forever etched into his brain: stalking... (read in full...)
Tested my boyfriend with texts from a "mystery admirer"... and he's arranged a date with her!
Q. I've been seeing on and off (cos of lack of time) this guy for 3years. He was and says he is so into me loves me very much; in the past i found 'his love' a bit suffocating. However recently I decided that i will give a good go to a relationship ...
A. 8 July 2007: Why on Earth would you set up a mindgame like this? I have a feeling he's dying just to know who the mystery girl is, and is less interested in actually going out with her. Of course, you'll never know if that's the case now that you've set up this ... (read in full...)
Is it worth investing in this guy?
Q. i met this guy on a dating site we exchanged e-mail address and phone numbers we have been talking for a week now and we found out we have alot in common. He asked me if i talk to anyone else on the site i said yes i get e-mails from others but i ...
A. 8 July 2007: You are not, in fact, seeing anyone at this point. You've known this guy online for only a week, and even if the two of you are interested in going out, you have no claims over him whatsoever at this early stage and you shouldn't expect him to be ... (read in full...)
My friend just started jerking me off even though he knows I'm a hetrosexual male!
Q. I stayed around a mates house the other week and we all stopped in the same room and some of us shared a double bed but made sure we had our own space. Well not long after that the lad lying near me moved very close to me and decided to put his hand ...
A. 5 May 2007: Ok, well, even if you are totally straight, you're obviously intrigued by this (you liked it a little bit, you put your leg over his, you pretended to be asleep to see "what would happen"). You might as well see this through until you get bored of ... (read in full...)
Annoyed that I didn't get her phone number at the wedding,,,but what could I do??
Q. when you meet a person at a wedding and you don't have your mobile with you, no pen or paper , how do you take the person's number to contact the person again? i was stuck in a situation like that at a Wedding. the inivitation said no mobile...
A. 23 April 2007: In such a case, you explain to the host of the wedding (who I assume you know) that you met another guest there and were unable to exchange numbers, and could they please pass along your phone-number/email address (this is more polite than trying to ... (read in full...)
Sex felt good, but then it started to hurt. What's the problem here?
Q. Hi, I've been seeing this guy for about a month. I really like him and we had sex. It was my first time and it was really good but then it started to hurt and we had to stop. Is this normal? Thank you. ...
A. 20 April 2007: It really depends on what you were doing. "Sex" doesn't have an agreed-upon definition.
But as a rule of thumb if something starts to hurt, ask your partner to stop, readjust, try again. Eventually you'll both find what works for you. Keep cop... (read in full...)
I'm sick of people telling me I shouldn't go out than someone younger than 18 or 20.
Q. I am 22 year old male and have a fair few 16 year old female friends. Now I have been told that this is stupid as they are all jail bait for relationships. Am I wrong if I like a 16 year old lass and would that be classed as being a pervert. I just ...
A. 20 April 2007: If the problem is that you get on better with ladies than men, that doesn't really explain why you insist on going out with girls so much younger than yourself. The reason people tend to take a dim view of mixed-age relationships (especially when ... (read in full...)
I feel that I like both men and women. How do I handle this?
Q. I have recently discovered that I am bisexual and have lately been having an urge to perform oral sex on other men. I know for a fact that none of my male friends are gay or bisexual and I don't know how to handle these desires, what should I do?...
A. 20 April 2007: 1. Masturbate.
2. Join a gay dating website.... (read in full...)
My ex' bf's new gf is trying to get in touch with me. I'm wondering what she wants from me?
Q. I broke up with my ex in January 2004, I had had suspicions for some time that he liked this other girl and sure enough they started going out a couple of weeks later! Since then I have tried to stay friends with him but he likes going down memory ...
A. 5 April 2007: The tasteful and honourable thing to do is to not discuss in any real detail your past relationship. If she needs those answers, she ought to get them from (your former, her current) boyfriend rather than sneak under his radar and go to you. You ... (read in full...)
The idea of being with a woman excites me! How would I even go about persuing intimacy with another woman?
Q. I have just recently seperated from my husband and at this time not interested in persuing a relationship with another man, ever again. I decided that after all that I've been through in my past relationships and especially my marraige that I would ...
A. 5 April 2007: I think a seperation grants you license to see other people, especially if you're determined to not have a relationship with a man ever again. A crazy fling is fine, but I hope you don't think your longterm problems with relationships can be solved ... (read in full...)
I have tried breaking up with her, but she keeps begging and pleading with me! What should I do?
Q. I have a problem guys! any help with this will be greatly appreciated! I have a girlfriend that i started dating in high school in my sophmore year, i am in my second year of college now. When we first started out i was a big jerk type of a guy, i...
A. 5 April 2007: Clearly this calls for drastic measures. Next time you break up with her, make sure you've blocked her email addresses, changed your phone number, and put new locks on your doors. This will make it easier to ignore her and simultaneously easier for ... (read in full...)
He had a one night stand, phoned me immediately as all he could think about was me! Is it right to forgive him?
Q. Right here is the thing, my boyfriend has recently gone out and had a one night stand with a girl, he rung me immediately after he had done it to tell me he had done this and and we have decided to stay together and make it work. he says he started ...
A. 4 April 2007: The bad news is your boyfriend (fiance?) cheated on you. The good news is it appears he handled it in the best possible way. All the stuff that ensued after the act (which he couldn't even finish), the instant phone call, the discussion, the renewed ... (read in full...)
I feel like she is tossing our love aside for her selfish need to experience freedom. Any thoughts?
Q. I dated this girl for nearly 2 years, we're both about the same age. After we both turned 21 she let it out that she just turned 21 and wanted to experience that freedom that goes with it. On top of that, she also wanted it because she is planning ...
A. 1 April 2007: Come on - what does she need to be single to do in Europe aside from sleeping around? She's practically begging you to dump her ass because she's too scared to initiate it herself. She's too hesitant to take the plunge and be single for real - ... (read in full...)
He says I'm fat, wants to leave me and wants to have sex with other women... but I love him, what do I do?
Q. hi me and my bf are together for 8years now.a year ago he started to swear at me then he changed alot towards me he got very rude and had a bad temper, he gets angry quickly. He told my yesterday he actually wants to leave me coz its my fault he ...
A. 1 March 2007: Holy shit - dump him and never, ever talk to him again. I'm sure you think he's an exception to the rule of "don't date abusive ass-holes" because of your history together, but that's the fatal loophole that all abusive assholes operate upon. No one ... (read in full...)
He said he'd call when he got back, that his phone was charging but I still haven't heard from him. Is he cheating on me?
Q. Is my fiance cheating on me? He is in Florida for two months just for fun (can take his work with him). Last night he turned his phone off because he said I was annoying him and he wanted to sleep. We talked things over and things were fine. Then, ...
A. 1 March 2007: Maybe he is or isn't cheating, but it doesn't sound like you're all that happy with him as it is. I know his cheating would be such a perfect excuse to dump his ass, but come on, you don't know of any clubs open past 3am? You're fishing for an ... (read in full...)
I would absolutely love to have a 3-some but how do I approach the wife about it?
Q. so...i kinda wanna have a threesome but how do i ask my wife if she wants to get involved? this could be a touchy area. i think it would be so hot to be with two girls but yeah asking the wife.......
A. 1 March 2007: Try and put yourself in your wife's shoes. What if she turned around one day and wanted to have a three-way with another man and you? Would you be shocked? Would you feel inadequate? Would you worry about her running off with the other guy? You need ... (read in full...)
She's worried that taking on my 3 kids will be too much for her... What can I do to assure her everything will be ok?
Q. Well here goes. I met this woman about one year ago and we hit it off immediately. I mean we have everything in common. It wasn't long before we fell in love. I am a 40 yr old divorced man and I have custody of my three children ages 15, 8 and ...
A. 28 February 2007: If you've convinced her to do a trial run, it sounds like you're already on the right track. You just need to make sure that run goes as smoothly as possible. Make sure you don't have any pressing engagements at work for that time (get everything ... (read in full...)
I just found out my boyfriend has been having a sexual relationship with another man!
Q. I am 26 with a young child, i have just found out my boyfriend of 8 months has had a sexual relationship with a much older man for the last 5 years (including the 6 of months with me). at the start of our relationship i did not see much of him as he ...
A. 28 February 2007: After a protracted and calculated deception like this, how could you ever trust him again? This isn't just an isolated slip-up like getting drunk and hitting on your younger sister, this is an entire 5-month-long web of deceit. How can you even be ... (read in full...)
She's married... should I tell her how I feel?
Q. hi i have this woman i my life and i really like her more than friends.the trouble is she is married should i tell her how i feel.any advice would be good....
A. 28 February 2007: No. No good will come of it. You stand only to lose her friendship and upset her marriage if you profess your feelings. For the sake of all involved, keep this one secret to yourself.... (read in full...)
Is this just my trust issues coming into play or might he be playing me?
Q. Now everyone has heard of myspace im sure of well there is this new guy im talking to and yes i meet him off of there. We went out on two dates and i saw him at his job and he came to mine. we have so much in common and i really like him. I never ...
A. 28 February 2007: I don't think you have enough information here. Lots of people are on good terms with their exes - that is in fact a good thing, because it shows even at the low-point in their relationship they worked it out and somehow remained friends. ... (read in full...)
I love my girlfriend but she hasn't given me any reason to trust her, what should I do?
Q. I love my girlfriend and she loves me, so she says, but I cant tell if I should trust her or no. She hasn't done anything for me not to trust her but she hasn'1 given me a reason to trust her niether. What should I do?...
A. 27 February 2007: Give her the benefit of the doubt: trust her with something small, and if she does well with it, trust her with something a little bigger until you've built up a foundation of trust. She has to earn your trust, but you need to give her some ... (read in full...)
I want to date her and she's thinking about it...but it's been a month! What's going on here?
Q. I've fallen in love with this wonderful girl and have let her know how i feel, and have asked her out, she said she needed time to think about things, obviously i argeed but that was a month ago and im starting to wonder what i should do?...
A. 29 January 2007: Ask her again and insist on a yes or no answer. At this stage, it will probably be a no. If she won't come out and choose, you should assume she doesn't have her act together and is just too frightened to do the honourable thing and let you down. ... (read in full...)
When is it okay to give a guy, a call?
Q. When is it okay to call a guy?...
A. 29 January 2007: Anytime you want, as long as it's before 10pm.... (read in full...)
I don't want to be like his ex-wife and ask him to stop playing his video games..but it is buggin me!
Q. My boyfriend plays video game as a way to release stress (or for fun too). His ex-wife always had a problem with him playing games and not spending time with her. He's only in his early 20s. He doesn't smoke or drink or go clubbing. Everyone has ...
A. 12 January 2007: Rather than telling him to cut down outright (which indeed comes off as controlling), maybe you can circumvent the problem by planning in advance activities for the both of you away from the home. Something similarly relaxing for the both of you, ... (read in full...)
He's spontaneous...I like things planned ahead of time! Is this just a guy thing?
Q. My boyfriend never seem like he's on top of things. I always see him as not knowing how to prepare things ahead of time. Maybe I'm a bit on the organize side. But I like the idea of knowing what to do next. On the other hand, my boyfriend is a ...
A. 12 January 2007: Just like girls, boys are all different and unique. Don't ascribe things about him to this whole 'Men are from Mars' trash - there are plenty of airy, disorganized girls around, too. Either grow to love this about him, learn to tolerate it, or find ... (read in full...)
I wouldn't sleep with him and now--he won't speak to me! Are all guys like this?
Q. i didnt slept with him! now he doesnt really talk to me! is he a Dic* or are most lads like this? i did really like him but im a virgin! but he didnt no that! is it my fault iv pushed him away (im nearly 18 in case u wanted 2 know)...
A. 12 January 2007: He is a dick. Good guys aren't like this. Cross him off your list.... (read in full...)
I'm 17 and my bf's 31. I've never made a move on a guy, so what do I do?
Q. well i am 17 and my man is 31. we have only been together for a few days but im just wondering when it is time for me to make a move (nothing drastic just kissing, im not ready for anything else). I have also never made a move on a guy before a...
A. 10 January 2007: If you aren't ready to go further than kissing, I'm not sure you'r ready to date a 31 year old man.
Just so you know, all the decent 31 year-old men are dating women around that age too. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that your boyfrien... (read in full...)
He's a newly married man, should I risk getting together with him?
Q. i am in love with a newly married man he is 13 years older than me but we connect so well.the thing is he flirts with me too and told me that he really likes me.should i risk it and go with him or should i just leave it please help....
A. 10 January 2007: In all cases where someone is considering becoming "the other woman", I always ask them to consider what they can say they know about the man-to-cheat. Numer one SHOULD be "I know he doesn't have qualms about cheating", which OUGHT to spell ... (read in full...)
My ld bf has booked his flight to go w/ me to prom, but they've just set an age limit of 21. He's 24! What do we do?
Q. Hi, I have a bit of a problem (obvious statement right?) I'm 18 years old and will be attending my Senior Prom in May. I was planning on taking my boyfriend since we've been dating for three months and were close friends long before that. He ...
A. 10 January 2007: Your first option is the litigious one: find out when your school imposed this policy. If your boyfriend booked a plane ticket before then, sock it to them on that basis.
Your second option is to go out on a very special evening with your boyfrien... (read in full...)
I tell my best friend who I like, then she goes and flirts w/ them in front of me!
Q. hello please will lots of people answrr as i would like a range of ideas please :(...... i dont no what to do, i tell my best friend i like some lads and she goes and flirts with them infront of me she's alot prettier than me and i have low self of ...
A. 10 January 2007: I know the mantle of 'best friend' usually means the person you can tell absolutely anything to, but in your case, maaaaaaaaaybe you should adjust it so that you tell her 99% of everything - i.e. talk about boys you like with your other friends and ... (read in full...)
I made it come across I was too busy to see him...should I be honest about my feelings?
Q. Hello, I ran into a friend from college, that lives out of state. He stated he always had a crush on me and we went out. We both really liked eachother and started talking on the phone for a month. I never told him how much I liked him eventhough ...
A. 19 October 2006: If he's already ticked with you, you risk nothing by coming clean with him. He'll either forgive you and give you a second chance, or he won't. Easy. If you were being coy before, your message should dispense with that up front. Tell him you didn't ... (read in full...)
He calls and text's constantly until we have sex then he goes quiet on me!
Q. I've been dating this guy on and off for nearly four years. We don't see each other regularly because we live in two different cities. We try to hook up at least twice a month, we have an awesome attraction towards each other and I believe that I'm ...
A. 19 October 2006: His keeping you at a distance like this may be a result of, well, the distance between you. Maybe he tries to turn off the connection rather than leave it on and suffer. If you get to see each other twice a month, you must be somewhat close ... (read in full...)
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