Like what
she writes?
... Add *nowbird to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *nowbird a private message | | | *nowbird's profile:I am a mother of 2 grown up boys who have had problems of their own, and I have a lot of experience in relationships, (Was married for 31 years, but to the wrong man), so am about to face a divorce. I have been through a lot of traumas in my personal life, both in my childhood and throughout.
I still see the good in people, though I have been through it somewhat, and still they all say I am very young for my age - something I always reply to that I refuse to get old!!! (Don't like it, won't have it!!!) :o)
I have helped a lot of friends, one bereaved at a young age of her husband, a few who have had cancer, (and survived); one who did not - a family member who has suffered sexual abuse at the hands of a man she was getting to know as her step-dad; one very dear friend who has just died and will be so sorely missed - by many people, not just me; and my sister, who was deserted by her boyfriend of 14 yrs and deprived of ever being able to have a child thanks to him; the list goes on - yes, you could say I have had a lot of life experience. I see things from all sides and try not to judge.
I live in Sale, near Manchester, England.
Without wanting to sound 'cheesy', the things which make me tick are people who go the extra mile for others, and, whilst I am no Mother Theresa, I try to live by the same ethic. After all, why else would we have been put on this earth?? I just hate to see good people being treated badly..we all have to live in this world, after all..
Not really religious, but try to do the right thing! Usually find a sense of humour helps too...thanx for reading this! |
|
I only use the pill when I see him, could I get pregnant?
Q. okay here's my question, I really hope that someone has any advice for me. Me and my fiancee are in a long distance relationship. I was on the pill last time I saw him (mid august) but messed up on it a couple times while visiting(time change, only ...
A. 19 September 2006: I really think you need to see your doctor about this - you are messing about with your hormones, and as with ALL medicines you should always follow the instructions. We are not all doctors, and do not have the training or skills necessary to help ... (read in full...)
I need ideas on how to keep my jealousy under control!
Q. Hi there, I'm hoping you can help me out here! I'm in a 9-months-and-counting long-distance relationship with a girl quite a bit younger than me. By long distance I mean, an hour drive and I only get to see her on weekends (this is very hard on ...
A. 19 September 2006: I don't want to tell you to break up with her, but perhaps some counselling may help you - does this go back to your childhood? - were you part of a large family where you were made to feel as though you were 'not as important' as your siblings?
... (read in full...)
Will this happen every time we have sex ??
Q. I had sex for the first time a month ago. It was good except for the fact i bled alot and was considerable painful and my boyfriend noticed! He is a considerably large guy in that department, some 8 inches and extremely wide. We haven't slept ...
A. 18 September 2006: Hmmm...!!!...to the last post!, lol!
Hop on top, then you can control penetration..and for goodness sake - plenty of lubrication!! Have fun!
... (read in full...)
We've talked on the phone for 18 months...but he doesn't want to me me! What's wrong?
Q. My boyfriend and I have talked on the phone for 18 months;he says he loves me but doesn't want to meet?...
A. 18 September 2006: It seems that if he will not meet you the relationship is bound to falter - high time now to force the issue, otherwise this could go on forever!..
The only way to move on in this situation is to tell him that you can't possibly move forward with... (read in full...)
Pete told me he loved me! I froze wasnt expecting it, I love him but didnt say so, is it now too late?
Q. So ive been dating a guy, pete for quite a while and ive posted many posts on here. But ive come across a big problem. Yesterday evening we went out together and as he dropped me home we kissed, hugged and while we were cuddling he said "i love...
A. 15 September 2006: Just say to him "Oh, about the other night - I hope you did'nt get the wrong impression, but I feel exactly the same way about you - it's just that you took me by surprise!"; and take it from there...he is sure to understand.... (read in full...)
Has everyone cheated at least once in their lives ???
Q. I'm curious. I jus want 2 know has every person cheated at least once in thier lifes? I jus find that alot of people on here have alot of questions about it n it seems alot of us have done it....
A. 15 September 2006: This is not perhaps the most appropriate place to seek this opinion, as by the very nature of it, people are on here because they are having problems, and as such are not representative of society in general.
You will probably get biased results ... (read in full...)
I love the fantasy idea of my girl with another bloke, but dont think in reality I can stomach, what is all this ??
Q. Please someone sort me out!! I'm with a beautiful woman whom I love very much. We've been together for almost 4 years now and we are soon to wed. We have a great sex life and I am never left feeling unfulfilled. But for some crazy, insane reaso...
A. 15 September 2006: O, that IS a relief!!
I've been worrying about that posting - not really out to shock anyone...but it WAS hard to resist!!...(tee-hee)..... (read in full...)
I love the fantasy idea of my girl with another bloke, but dont think in reality I can stomach, what is all this ??
Q. Please someone sort me out!! I'm with a beautiful woman whom I love very much. We've been together for almost 4 years now and we are soon to wed. We have a great sex life and I am never left feeling unfulfilled. But for some crazy, insane reaso...
A. 14 September 2006: Buy a rubber hammer, and use it as an aversion therapy tool, and give your erect knob a thwack with it if it came about whilst having that bad thought (ouch!) - that outta do it.., Oh, I don't know, just an idea I came up with. Only a giggle, not ... (read in full...)
His ex will not leave us alone, its really upsetting me, all I want to do his make him happy!!
Q. Please help me, I am 22 years old and am seeing a man that is 8 years my senior. He has four kids and an ex that just wont leave us alone. I have to put up with her constant threats and this is really getting me down. But most of all whats rea...
A. 14 September 2006: Furthermore in response to your previous message - of COURSE you are not being a "bitch"!!
It is only natural that you would need comfort and support when you are feeling down - this is the very reason we want to share our lives with someone!... (read in full...)
We've talked on the phone for 18 months...but he doesn't want to me me! What's wrong?
Q. My boyfriend and I have talked on the phone for 18 months;he says he loves me but doesn't want to meet?...
A. 14 September 2006: More info, please - how can you call him a boyfriend when you never see him?
Have you ever actually met him face to face?
Do you know any of his friends/family - could you talk to them about it?
Alarm bells ringing away here - are you sure he's no... (read in full...)
I have lost interest in her because of her breasts!
Q. My gf and i have been in a relationship for over 3 months. I am begining to loose interest in her becasue she has very small breasts. This sounds really immature but I can't help but feel it. I really like her and she has the best personality and ...
A. 14 September 2006: O, if your 'mates' say drop her, then go ahead, do her a favour and drop her - I hope they then tell you to go jump in a croc-infested swamp!!!
IMMATURE, oh, yes, indeedy!... (read in full...)
His ex will not leave us alone, its really upsetting me, all I want to do his make him happy!!
Q. Please help me, I am 22 years old and am seeing a man that is 8 years my senior. He has four kids and an ex that just wont leave us alone. I have to put up with her constant threats and this is really getting me down. But most of all whats rea...
A. 14 September 2006: All this is clearly too much for you.
YOU in the wrong??? - I don't think so!!
Do yourself a favour and dump him - he sounds far too insensitive for any woman, let alone someone as sensitive as you! With all the crap you are getting from his... (read in full...)
We have been off on, off on, for a while now, I dont want to push her, so should I give her the space ?
Q. In feb of '04 I met the most amazing girl. I never believed in love at first sight but the moment I saw her I was drawn to her like I had never been to anyone else before. We had the story book relationship for a while. Everything was wonderful and ...
A. 14 September 2006: I think it would be wise for you to leave her alone while she sorts herself out, and as you say, send her a text letting her know you are still thinking of her, or better still a nice hand-written letter telling her you understand how she wants her ... (read in full...)
Im scared he will get swayed by all the girls in the internet Chatrooms!!!
Q. Hi, I have been with my Bf for 3 years. Just lately im starting to feel very insecure, I shouldnt as we are very much in love but im scared... My Bf is a very sort of social type person and will have a laugh and chat and always go out of his...
A. 14 September 2006: Show him this post - it will tell him all he needs to know, and how serious you are.
If he is as caring as you say, he maybe will give it a rest..but it really is addictive!
Why don't you get him on here as an 'agony Aunt' - This way, he will be ... (read in full...)
I love the fantasy idea of my girl with another bloke, but dont think in reality I can stomach, what is all this ??
Q. Please someone sort me out!! I'm with a beautiful woman whom I love very much. We've been together for almost 4 years now and we are soon to wed. We have a great sex life and I am never left feeling unfulfilled. But for some crazy, insane reaso...
A. 13 September 2006: Trust me, it's a fantasy - and as such, it should remain where it is - in your head. Use it to make you feel horny if you need to, but don't ruin a beautiful relationship by acting upon it. You could destroy all the trust she has in you, and you ... (read in full...)
Im falling for my best mate, trouble is im so horrid to him and he puts up with it, but dont think he feels the same, what do I do ?
Q. Where can I start apart from im in love with my best (only) male friend. He knows that im falling in love with him but because he was badly hurt last year does not want a relationship. We have not had sex or kissed properly so that is not a ...
A. 13 September 2006: I hope you can find it in yourself to ask him outright how he feels about your relationship, and where to go from here.
If he says he will always be just a friend, then I'm afraid you are going to have to deal with it, but on the other hand, wh... (read in full...)
A question about age-gap relationships, in general. Opinions wanted.
Q. Hi! I don't want to be annoying so I promise this is the last question I'll post about age gaps. I've noticed a common thread among responses on here when the younger person in the relationship is very young (late teens, like me). People say thing...
A. 13 September 2006: You do have a valid point, however a friendship is different to a romantic one in that it is a one-to-one, exclusive relationship with other dynamics.. you will always want the same thing from a friend, whereas in a romantic situation the boundaries ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my bf...that he has real bad body odor?
Q. I'm in love with a guy who has bad b.o. and I don't know how to tell him. He smokes alot of pot so I think he doesn't remember to put deorderant on. Do you think I should bring it up to him? If so how? ...
A. 13 September 2006: Just buy him some strong, long-lasting deo, and tell him he stinks!
If he can't laugh it off with you, then he has no sense of humour.
And if he has no sense of humour, what's the point being together anyhow? Consider - how much respect has ... (read in full...)
I still love her and I'm devastated over it. Is it really that unlikely that she'll come back, like others tell me?
Q. Just over a month ago, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me before entering college (I am a sophomore, she was entering my college as a freshman). This breakup was sudden and devastating, as we were EXTREMELY close. She broke up with me over ...
A. 13 September 2006: One thing is for sure, hanging around looking needy is not going to bring her back. Let her see you out and about with a new crowd of friends, happy and getting along without her.
Perhaps, when you are ready to date again (without using someone ... (read in full...)
I have tired of putting my life on hold for him...am I being impatient and should I wait?
Q. I live with man whom I love dearly. He has 2 children who don't want to associate with me. We both left our ex's for each other.I have asked him what are his intentions for the future as I want us to be a couple and to start to set goals. However, ...
A. 13 September 2006: Give him an ultimatum - either he makes a decision by (such and such a date) - and if he does nothing by then, well, say he never had any intention of committing to you in full.
Tell him that you are not playing at wendy houses here, this is life,... (read in full...)
We had sex but he is now treating me like dirt!
Q. Repeating the same mistakes over and over. I'm so tired and low tonight, I just don't know how much more I can take. I seem to be setting myself up for such a rubbish time of it, and I can try and blame others but really it's down to me. A...
A. 12 September 2006: Any time, chuck, glad to be of assistance! (HUGS)... (read in full...)
I like him - but he is gay!
Q. There is this one guy I was interested in dating, but I found out that he is gay. He and I have a lot in common, but I am worried about this....
A. 11 September 2006: You can no more make him into a heterosexual, than somebody could turn you into a lesbian - think about it!!!... (read in full...)
I want to have sex with my boyfriend - but he is 21 and I'm only 14!
Q. ive bin with my boyfrien 4 seven months im 14 and hes 21 we have decided to have sex and got contraception and such like but im really nervous because i dnt no wat mt body should look like plz can you help me ? ...
A. 11 September 2006: Sweets, you are FAR too young to be engaging in sex - your body has'nt even finished growing yet!! Please just enjoy your childhood, and your virginity - it is SO precious, and you could end up regretting it for the rest of your life! Enjoy your ... (read in full...)
We had sex but he is now treating me like dirt!
Q. Repeating the same mistakes over and over. I'm so tired and low tonight, I just don't know how much more I can take. I seem to be setting myself up for such a rubbish time of it, and I can try and blame others but really it's down to me. A...
A. 11 September 2006: Just keep being strong - I know where you are coming from, and it sure is no walk in the park trying to build back your self-esteem.
Guys like him certainly don't help either - it's a shame thay cant see the trail of destruction left in their wa... (read in full...)
Should I believe that they are really separated, even though her clothes hang in the wardrobe ?
Q. i am currently in a relation with a married man. they are living in two different countries and have been separated for the past 3 to 4 years. he says they are no longer in love with each other. just recently the wife came to visit with their two ...
A. 11 September 2006: Have you asked him?
Maybe you are hesitant in case he thinks you are 'snooping'? In that case try going out to a restaurant or somewhere dressy from his place, and ask if you can hang the dress up in the wardrobe - "so that it does'nt get crea... (read in full...)
Ive been with my guy for a year now, but its really odd that I dont know what he does for work!!?
Q. Iv been dating my bf for nearly a year... i feel as though i know him quite well except for ONE thing... i dont know where he works or what his occupation is. Is this strange? im 21 and at university and hes 26. Each time i mention it, he evades i...
A. 11 September 2006: You are going to have to know sooner or later, especially if the relationship is going to go anywhere.
You have known him for a year now, have you thought of having a casual get-together with mutual friends? The subject is bound to come up, and ... (read in full...)
What this fight at the club really a big deal?
Q. Hello people, I hope you can give me some advice. I have been seeing my boyf for about a month and things have been going really well. However, we had a bit of a row the other day and it's still bugging me. Basically we went to a club and his ...
A. 7 September 2006: I would also add to the other posting from BabyGirl that if he does not know you that well it could have appeared that you may be a bit of a 'scrounger', and this is something which is important to address, and provide proof that you are nothing of ... (read in full...)
Do you think my Ex might still love me ?
Q. At school i keep catching my exboyfriend gazing at me , but i only notice him doing it because i daze at him to . do you think he might still love me ? ...
A. 7 September 2006: I'm wondering if you still have feelings for him??
Do you wish that he still had feelings for you, and may secretly want to get back together?
It may be worth examining your reasons for ending the relationship, and seeing if those matters st... (read in full...)
Need advice about the art of sex! Any help is appreciated!
Q. hey folks, i'm 17 years old male and never had sex and was just want to know a couple of things. 1- when i go to have sex will i know when my penis is in and when to start thrusting 2- should i feel some sort of pleasure from the start or at le...
A. 7 September 2006: All I know - even though not a man - is if it is 'in', you will most definitely know! Also, you will feel the urge to move at your own pace, but best from most peoples' point of view, is to start with plenty of foreplay, so that you are BOTH turned ... (read in full...)
His family is against us being together and I'm not even allowed to talk to him!
Q. Dear Cupid, My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now, when we first met eachother it was love at first sight, it was weird it was as if something lead us to meet and in an instant we just clicked as if we had known eachother for a ...
A. 7 September 2006: There really is'nt much to go on here without further information.
Would it be possible for you to send a letter to his home address requesting an explanation?
Ask if there is anything you have personally done to offend him or his family, any ... (read in full...)
Sex in the shower... Any tips ?
Q. I've heard making love in the shower is a very romantic thing to do. I've tried it with my boyfriend and I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but I don't find it enjoying. I don't like the idea of water in my eye and we can never get into a position ...
A. 7 September 2006: wow!...now I know where the soap is!... (read in full...)
He hurt me and now what we have is a shadow of what we had before!!
Q. I was hurt by my boyfriend, I understand how it happened, he understand why I was hurt. It was unfortunate. He's sorry about it. Problem is I don't feel as much for him as I did. Don't get me wrong I still love him, need him and care about him. It's ...
A. 7 September 2006: I can say that I have recently been in exactly the same situation as yourself, and if it helps you to know how I dealt with it, here goes:
I have been seeing a man for almost a year now, and he made a silly mistake which severely damaged the trus... (read in full...)
Im hesistant to have sex as hes a big guy, how can I bring up this topic ?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for a little over a year now. We have talked about sex and different precautions, but I am still hesitant because I am a virgin and he is not a small guy(6'4" and everything is proportional). How do I bring up the topic ...
A. 7 September 2006: You have been with him for over a year, so you ought to know whether he is likely to be gentle, patient and understanding with you.
Make sure that you are relaxed an take your time. Have plenty of foreplay and make certain that you are well... (read in full...)
I finally got with Pete! Problem is I've never had a boyfriend before, so dont know how to make us an adorable couple!
Q. Ok so my new boyfriend pete that i had a crush on for 5 years and i finally got him =D. But ive never had a boyfriend before i dont really know what to do thats sweet, and something he will love me for and most of my friends do really cute things f...
A. 7 September 2006: Send him cute text messages - about nothing in particular, out of the blue, to let him know you are thinking of him..not too often, but a couple of times a week, perhaps.
Find out what he likes to eat, and what all his favourite foods are, and... (read in full...)
Caught masturbating by my brother!!!
Q. my brother caught me masturbating to porn...what should i do if he tells my parents and what should i do about him?...
A. 6 September 2006: Don't worry, it's natural, why should he tell them? Your parents will probably tell him off for sneaking around and peeking at people!... (read in full...)
I love her so much that when we are apart it hurts so much, how can I deal a bit better ?
Q. Is it possible to love somebody TOO much? I am engaged to a girl, she has made me the happiest I have ever been in my life. When we are together, I am in heaven, but when we are apart, I am like a lost puppy. When she is not around, I become moo...
A. 6 September 2006: This is so romantic! I feel your pain, and do hope you can very soon get together on a permanent basis - like the old saying goes - "Love will find a way"..you really need to look after yourselves though!... (read in full...)
My similarly attractive friend has more success with guys than me... Where am I going wrong?
Q. I am wondering what I am doing wrong around guys. I have a friend who is about the same level of attractiveness as myself and she has more success with guys. I feel like guys do not really like me and they treat me as if I was invisable. That being ...
A. 6 September 2006: You don't need to come to terms with it!
Get your friend out clothes-shopping and see if you can find anything which shows off your best attributes! Not to say that you need to look tarty, far from it - that look will get plenty of attentio... (read in full...)
"The lady doth protest to much, methinks."-William Shakespeare, Hamlet
Q. I was the one who asked "The signs are there that she likes me... should I ring her?", and well, here I am agian, asking for more advice. This time it's in a more general sense though. Still talking about the same girl as last time but this co...
A. 6 September 2006: Sounds to me as though she has mentioned to him that she does'nt want the subject brought up in front of you in case you got the wrong impression..it does strike me as being somewhat extreme, though, hitting someone just for that!!... (read in full...)
How do you deal with gossips? Why do people gossip?
Q. My question is why is it that some people gossip sooo much. I like the place I work but there are a group of people who spend a lot of the working day talking about this person and that person. Half the time the people they are talking about do not ...
A. 6 September 2006: Just do as you are doing and keep your distance whilst staying polite, honest and friendly. No-one can touch you for that!
Gossips do tend to form little 'cliques', and others know who they are. They lack credibility anyway as they are small-mi... (read in full...)
How do I make amends with her family??
Q. My Mexican gf of 3+ years recently visited my home country here in Ireland and despite the exquisite trust that her parents had put in here and me, we had sex (once very, very briefly with no protection and then several times with a condom). To tho...
A. 6 September 2006: Why don't you send them a hand-written letter informing them of your intentions. Tell them that you love their daughter and she is so very precious to you and that you did not mean for this to happen. Tell her you are standing by her, and hope to ... (read in full...)
Worried about my sons odd diet!!
Q. Hi there Apologies if this seems weird or odd, but it's a problem which I can't seem to find much advice for. My 14-year-old son is having an odd diet; he ate spaghetti, ice-cream and mashed potato in one meal washed down with Coca-Cola. Then...
A. 6 September 2006: It does seem odd, but kids do the strangest of things - especially in their teens! It could be a touch of teenage rebellion - easier to handle than some of the other tricks I have heard of, or drugs.. How long has he been doing this?
Could he be c... (read in full...)
I love her so much that when we are apart it hurts so much, how can I deal a bit better ?
Q. Is it possible to love somebody TOO much? I am engaged to a girl, she has made me the happiest I have ever been in my life. When we are together, I am in heaven, but when we are apart, I am like a lost puppy. When she is not around, I become moo...
A. 31 August 2006: Is there no way that you could move closer to her? Can't one of you re-locate? Silly question, maybe, as you have probably already considered it, but the way it is affecting you, even to take a cut in wages for a while, could go some way to ... (read in full...)
I love her so much that when we are apart it hurts so much, how can I deal a bit better ?
Q. Is it possible to love somebody TOO much? I am engaged to a girl, she has made me the happiest I have ever been in my life. When we are together, I am in heaven, but when we are apart, I am like a lost puppy. When she is not around, I become moo...
A. 24 August 2006: Just enjoy it - I don't agree that 'it will pass(!?!)..but it will calm down after you have been together for a while. It is the 'absence which makes the heart grow fonder' - a cliche for sure, but the only way that a cliche can grow, is if it is ... (read in full...)
| *nowbird's friends
These are mutual friends, so *nowbird has
added them and they have added *nowbird!
|
