My irrational fear of getting pregnant is stopping me from meeting guys.
Q. Hi there, i'm sure this seems like a really stupid question but i just need some calming advice. I'm 22, still a virgin and only kissed a couple of guys. I dont have a problem with any of this however my problem is i have an irrational fear of ...
A. 3 June 2013: Then you need to seek help from a psychiatrist. ... (read in full...)
I'm not having sex till I get married. Why do so many friends criticise me for this?
Q. I'm a girl, at university and I've decided I'm not having sex till I get married. I'm Christian, but that's actually not the reason why - I'm really liberal and fully in support of gay marriage/pro-choice etc. It's because sex means a lot to me ...
A. 3 June 2013: It seems like a few of you took what I said a little too personally and I'm not really sure why some people seem offended by what I've stated. I did not point out any specific person in my post, merely made a list of general observations. ... (read in full...)
Our moral values don't match because my girlfriend has no compassion towards suffering.
Q. I had a conversation with my girlfriend today about how I was upset about other people getting unfairly hurt due to no fault of their own, people being homeless and such and she told me that people who care about others are stupid and that people ...
A. 3 June 2013: If she lacks compassion for human suffering, she will not make a compatible partner for you in the long-term. Similar views about society and similar moral viewpoints is absolutely CRITICAL for the long-term health of a relationship.
Serio... (read in full...)
My irrational fear of getting pregnant is stopping me from meeting guys.
Q. Hi there, i'm sure this seems like a really stupid question but i just need some calming advice. I'm 22, still a virgin and only kissed a couple of guys. I dont have a problem with any of this however my problem is i have an irrational fear of ...
A. 3 June 2013: If you are aware of how babies are made and how to prevent it, then you have nothing to fear. Since you can't get pregnant from just meeting a man, what's REALLY stopping you?... (read in full...)
I'm not having sex till I get married. Why do so many friends criticise me for this?
Q. I'm a girl, at university and I've decided I'm not having sex till I get married. I'm Christian, but that's actually not the reason why - I'm really liberal and fully in support of gay marriage/pro-choice etc. It's because sex means a lot to me ...
A. 3 June 2013: I want to clear up some misconceptions that are being liberally shared here. Virginity is a social construct that in no way indicates the worth of the person. Having sex with someone in no way affects your value or worth as a human being. No ... (read in full...)
Why would she say 'yes' to a drink and then not text me?
Q. Probably a question mainly for the ladies on here , so I've been working in a new office since January, and I have noticed their is a cute girl that works next door. Of which I've grown to like and wanted to get to know more. I've lightly flirted ...
A. 2 June 2013: Instead of waiting for her to text you, YOU text HER.
-NEVER- wait for people to give you what you want. You have to pursue it yourself.... (read in full...)
I'm not having sex till I get married. Why do so many friends criticise me for this?
Q. I'm a girl, at university and I've decided I'm not having sex till I get married. I'm Christian, but that's actually not the reason why - I'm really liberal and fully in support of gay marriage/pro-choice etc. It's because sex means a lot to me ...
A. 2 June 2013: The next time someone brings it up, tell them flat out that you refuse to discuss it. It's no one's business but yours what you do with your body.
Also, avoid bringing the topic up yourself in the future.... (read in full...)
Is he counting the cost, despite refusing my offers to go dutch? He now says I order pricey food all the time
Q. Hi all. I've been dating this guy for a couple of months, we both go to graduate school and work at the same time. The other day we were talking during dinner and he said that I always ordered the most expensive thing in the menú and drinks! ...
A. 2 June 2013: You need to tell him that if he continues to refuse your offers to split the bill with him, he has NO RIGHT to complain about the price of the bills.
You've offered to help him pay. He's said no. He cannot logically complain about the price wh... (read in full...)
Fried Chicken was my birthday gift:(
Q. I have been dating this guy for nearly six months. Things have not gone so smoothly, but we worked through our differences and we both like each other a great deal. My birthday was last week and as a gift, he brought me a big bag of fried chicken...
A. 1 June 2013: Some people are inherently bad at gift giving. I understand why you're upset, but don't hold it against him and punish him for this, some people just can't help it.
Next time, TELL HIM what you want for special occasions. My husband is terrible... (read in full...)
Am I still a virgin after my friend put her finger inside of me?
Q. i came here once, and i talked about where me and my girlfriend made out, and i regretted my action. So now i told her im not interested in her because i so much love my boyfriend. I forget to mention that im a virgin, and have not have sex before, ...
A. 1 June 2013: No, no. I'm sorry but no, penetration with a penis is not the only way to lose your virginity. A lesbian who will never have sex with a man is not a virgin after she has sex with her girlfriend/wife!
--Virginity is subjective depending on your ... (read in full...)
Is being called the other half a good thing?
Q. Is it a good thing if boyfriend refers to you as the other half when he talks to others about plans?...
A. 1 June 2013: I personally would consider it a very good thing as he's openly calling you his partner.... (read in full...)
I treated her badly she has a restraining order on me but I can't forget her!
Q. Hi I feel like I'm going crazy. I need some serious help. I'm in love with my childhood best friend. I've been in love with her since elementary school. Words can't describe how amazing she is. She is sweet, kind, compassionate, selfless, drop dead ...
A. 31 May 2013: I was the girl in your story once. I went through a similar experience when my ex and I broke up. He was physically and emotionally abusive with me for years and hurt me many times and was regularly unfaithful to me. When I finally left him... (read in full...)
Younger boyfriend isn't sure about us because I have experienced things he hasn't
Q. My boyfriend is eleven years younger than me. Im 37 and he's 26, he's never had kids, had a long term relationship or lived w anyone. I, on the other hand, have been married, have 2 kids from 2 different fathers. He tells me he feels like its ...
A. 31 May 2013: You need to sit down and have a serious talk with him. Some men can't handle when their female significant other has more life experience than them because their ego is dependent on being considered competent and capable. Obviously you are ... (read in full...)
My husband's comment about "you women" made me immediately think he's cheating!
Q. I have suspected for months that things have been going on at my husband's place of work although of course he has strongly denied as he really has too much to lose. However, we were about to go to bed for sex the other evening and it was cold so ...
A. 31 May 2013: I think you're being really paranoid here, hon. I often use the term "You men" when speaking to my husband but I'm not cheating on him, and I've seen other people do it too, when referring to something that a certain subset of people do. It's no big ... (read in full...)
I have reached the end of my patience with my boyfriend, but I'm too much of a pushover to let him go. Help?
Q. Okay. Well where do I start? I have been with my boyfriend now for almost 5 months. I'm not going to go majorly into the backstory about how we got together, but before hand I had been in a 9 month relation...
A. 31 May 2013: You'll leave him when you're truly ready to.
Until then, you already know what your reality is. You'll continue to have to deal with all the stress and tears he brings you regardless of how that negatively impacts your life. I'm sorry hon.
... (read in full...)
Are most young guys in relationships really committed to their girlfriends nowadays?
Q. Quite a few close male friends I know in relationships don't actually seem to care about their girlfriends all that much. Or they do, but they see her as a temporary thing, and merely a girl of convenience for sex and companionship rather than ...
A. 31 May 2013: At your age, both men and women commonly aren't looking for marriage or long-term relationship and are merely enjoying what they have at the moment. This is totally normal and not something to be horrified at, since at your age it would be ... (read in full...)
The thought of sex with just anyone makes me physically ill. Am I the only one out there like this? Will I ever meet anyone?
Q. I am 21 years old and never had a boyfriend or sexual contact or anything. Yeah, I've had self esteem issues. But realistically, I've never even ever met anyone in real life that I had any feelings for. I never met anyone that I was attracted to. ...
A. 30 May 2013: I'm sorry Cerberus but you're feeding the OP some misinformation that I feel obligated to clear up. Plenty of people on the asexual spectrum have a libido, feel a desire for orgasm and fantasize, plenty of them masturbate. Much like any other s... (read in full...)
The thought of sex with just anyone makes me physically ill. Am I the only one out there like this? Will I ever meet anyone?
Q. I am 21 years old and never had a boyfriend or sexual contact or anything. Yeah, I've had self esteem issues. But realistically, I've never even ever met anyone in real life that I had any feelings for. I never met anyone that I was attracted to. ...
A. 30 May 2013: It's entirely possible that you are on the asexual spectrum. Not feeling any desire for sex, and actually feeling a strong revulsion towards the idea of having sex may indicate that you are potentially some form of asexual. That's not the end of the ... (read in full...)
I want a relationship with him, but I don't know if he feels the same and I don't know how to bring it up in conversation. How do I find out how he feels?
Q. I have become really close to a guy who is 2 years older than me (I am 18, he is 20) It started in the new year when we were walking home with a couple of friends from the pub and we were walking in front of everyone else as he had offered to walk ...
A. 30 May 2013: Generally speaking, it's always best to be direct when asking for something you want, no matter what it is.
Tell him that you're romantically interested in him and would like to be his girlfriend. You don't have to be sappy, or fancy about it... (read in full...)
Is it selfish to be a bit upset that my freshly-out gay friend will never feel for me what I feel for him?
Q. I've always considered myself pan-sexual. I only fall for special people, regardless of gender. I can only fall for personality and not sex, and never people I haven't known for a while. I have a really good friend, whom I've been infatuated with ...
A. 30 May 2013: It's natural to feel sad that your love interest isn't romantically attracted to you. It doesn't make you selfish, it makes you human.
As a pansexual person, I completely relate to your frustration in this, as I've also fallen for people who eith... (read in full...)
Is cyber sex considered cheating?
Q. Hi all, Just a question I would like to ask other users here. If you are in a loving, committed relationship with your soul mate whom you love dearly but find out they have meaningless cybersex (without masturbating) would you consider it chea...
A. 29 May 2013: If both parties agree to it and think it's okay, obviously it's not cheating.
But if one or both parties in the relationship consider it breaking the boundaries of respect in their relationship, then it's a problem.
So, in my relationship yes... (read in full...)
How to deal with disappear reappear guy
Q. Hi I really need an advice. Apparently I'm dealing with a houdini. The old disappear and reappear acts. I've dated this guy for a month. we went on 4 great dates. on our last date he brought me home, we watched movie, we kissed for the first ti...
A. 27 May 2013: He's only interested in you for sex. The fact that you didn't sleep with him -was a good thing- since that's what he was after.
He's not that into you. Men that are really interested in a girl FIND THE TIME to spend with her. They -make- the time... (read in full...)
After a fight and make up, girlfriend says no sex. We are going on a holiday and no sex???
Q. Hi AA's This question is long winded so apologies. Ive been going out with a girl for 4 years now, in reality she is very insecure but also has to have her own way as she believes what she wants is the right thing and dosnt see outside the bo...
A. 27 May 2013: For one thing, Not being In The Mood for Sex DOES NOT EQUAL "I'm not sexually attracted to you anymore". That's not even in the same solar system of alike-ness, okay?
Two, being emotionally burnt out and feeling vulnerable and hurt is bad for almo... (read in full...)
When he doesn't want me, he throws me away. When he does want me, he expects me to go flying to him!
Q. I broke up with my ex last month because he drifted apart. He's white and I'm Asian. He studies abroad now. He never contacted me so I asked him for closure. He didn't say anything either. I was pissed because I don't even deserve a closure after ...
A. 26 May 2013: Ignore him. He's not really all that into you...men that are in love MAKE THE TIME to spend with you. If you can't even be in a stable relationship while he's in school, what makes you think your marriage will be a happy place? Sounds like you're ... (read in full...)
Am I dating someone too young for me?
Q. I'm a 26 year old mature student and I recently began seeing another student who is 18 about to turn 19, it took me a while to go on a date with this guy cause of the age difference but we get on really well, however I am still really worried about ...
A. 26 May 2013: I don't mean to seem like I'm minimizing your concerns because I'm truly not trying to. Right now, though, I think you're a little too worried over what in reality is a very small age gap. By the time you're 30, the age gap won't matter so much as ... (read in full...)
Why have I already resigned myself to the fact that I'll never find someone ?
Q. I am 22 and pretty good looking, I get told quite often I could get most girls (by both guys and girls). To begin with it was a nice ego boost to think people believed that about me. But now it just depresses me as in actual fact I never done ...
A. 25 May 2013: I totally get you man. I was there when I was younger...I was scrawny, flat chested and pansexual with a serious case of the terminal shy's. Too nervous to ask out men or women, and ended up alone most of my teenage years. Then a funny thing happ... (read in full...)
The little death--a man crying after sex?
Q. I want to ask people about something I recently learnt about called "The Little Death" when a guy cries after sex. Why is this? None of my exes did this. Can someone explain this further?...
A. 25 May 2013: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_petite_mort
The Little Death is another term for orgasm, it does not refer to crying after sex.
... (read in full...)
Why do guys pay flirty, promiscuous girls so much attention?
Q. Do guys usually like the flirty and promiscuous type of girls? I need some advice because I hate to say I'm a little jealous of this girl I know who gets so much attention from my guy friends and just a lot of guys in general. She sleeps around wi...
A. 24 May 2013: I agree with the anonymous poster below. I think you are feeling bitter and jealous and focusing on trashing "The Popular Girl" instead of working on yourself to make yourself feel more confident and happy. Your level of self-worth is no... (read in full...)
Does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship?
Q. does sleeping in separate beds always lead to the end of a relationship? i ask because my fiance and i live together and i find it hard to sleep next to him due to his snoring. i've had important professional exams today, so for the last week, he's ...
A. 24 May 2013: No, separate beds for sleeping is actually a lot more common thank you think! It's estimated by "The Internet" that about a quarter of couples go through periods of sleeping in separate beds at least occasionally due to differing work schedules, ... (read in full...)
How can I tactfully reject him?
Q. Hello, First off thank you in advance for taking the time to read and offer advice :) I have a FRIEND that insists on hanging out with me and stuff. He invited me to a wedding in Washington state, he calls me "sexy", "Pretty lady" and things...
A. 24 May 2013: You're too old to play these games. Tell him directly that you feel no romantic attraction to him AND STOP ACCEPTING HIS GIFTS.
Spend less time with him. You're just going to end up giving him hope that you two might have a future together... (read in full...)
He wants to get married and have children and I'm not sure yet. Do I stay and have kids or do I let him go?
Q. I have been together with a guy for two years. We live together and for the most part, things are fine. We come from different cultures and are quite different as people, but we get on well in many respects. I'm happy enough with him but he doesn't ...
A. 23 May 2013: I never said it was necessary, but you might be with this man for several years yet and you don't want to have kids RIGHT AFTER meeting someone new. It's not a bad idea to do it now, it's MERELY A SUGGESTION, so everyone calm down, please. ... (read in full...)
Is he using me? He gives me no physical contact but wants me to buy things for him!
Q. So, I have been dating my boyfriend for a couple weeks now. So far I have bought dinners, lunch, he told me he needed sunglasses, and then that he needed rent. He doesnt have a car and have been running him up and down the road. I dont particularly ...
A. 23 May 2013: I usually say money should NEVER change hands in a couple that hasn't had sex or been together at least six months AT LEAST. Two weeks and you already paid his rent?! Sweetie, you haven't been in his life long enough to see one month of rent pass, ... (read in full...)
He wants to get married and have children and I'm not sure yet. Do I stay and have kids or do I let him go?
Q. I have been together with a guy for two years. We live together and for the most part, things are fine. We come from different cultures and are quite different as people, but we get on well in many respects. I'm happy enough with him but he doesn't ...
A. 23 May 2013: You don't really sound all that into him. Don't have kids with him, even to make him happy. You'd be making a huge mistake. This relationship is in it's last legs, you're probably going to end it with him soon...and really, that'd be the best opt... (read in full...)
My boyfriend pointed out a larger girl to me and said if I ever got that fat he would dump me!
Q. I am 27 and have been with my boyfriend for just under 4 years. At the weekend we were on a night out and he pointed out a woman on the dancefloor who was probably a UK size 14/16 and he told me if I ever get as fat as that he will dump me! Now this ...
A. 23 May 2013: He probably is one of those kinds of guys that likes extremely, extremely thin women and any weight gain at all, even healthy weight that makes you feel and look better, will turn him off. I strongly STRONGLY advise you to consider your fu... (read in full...)
Dodgy messages on husband's phone, suspicions of a prostitute, should I phone the person to see who it is?
Q. I have been married for almost ten years and we have a six year old son. My husband has always been interested in porn (every year or so he slips up and I "find" something, particularly quite young women although not illegal), but I have had no ...
A. 21 May 2013: Professional prostitutes don't do "credit", so he doesn't owe her money for sex. Prostitutes ask for -all- the money up front and if the guy doesn't have all of it, they don't get laid.
So he may be fucking her, but he's not fucking her and payi... (read in full...)
Is it normal for guy friends to touch each other?
Q. Is it normal for guy friends to touch each other so much? My boyfriend says all guys do this, but I don't think so. In their group of friends they are always joking about having sex with each other, and they grab each others asses and squeeze it. ...
A. 21 May 2013: If his friend was a woman, you would automatically understand exactly what was going on, but because his friend is male, you're having a hard time seeing the forest for the trees.
He's sleeping with his buddy. Time to move on.... (read in full...)
He hasn't replied to my message, should I delete his number?
Q. I've met this guy that's a few years older than me a few times and recently sent him a text (yesterday at almost 12am) it is now a little past 5. He normally takes a while to answer (few hours) but not this long. Should I just give up and move...
A. 21 May 2013: Men that are REALLY interested in you -make the time- to answer your texts.
He's not that into you. Get rid of his number.... (read in full...)
Why do I miss him, even after a week? He dumped me!
Q. Dear Cupid My bf of 3 years dumped me last week. He was very abusive for that past 6 months. Long story short, I haven't called him since the day he dumped me. I'm making myself busy at work so I won't have time to mope. But for the past 2 days...
A. 21 May 2013: You're putting unrealistic expectations on yourself.
A relationship of 3 years can't just disappear after 7 days.
It'll take a few MONTHS for you to recover completely. Give yourself time. Stay away from him, and let yourself mourn the loss.... (read in full...)
Would you date someone with so many tattoos? Or would you fear it would ruin your reputation?
Q. Today while on lunch break a friend said to me, very openly and out loud, "did you see all the tattoos on that guy's face? He must have been to prison!" I quietly nodded then thought of something... I was very attracted to another friend who had m...
A. 20 May 2013: My husband's arms are covered in tattoos. I could care less what it might do to my reputation, because it's none of anyone's business what my husband does to his own skin. If they want to judge ME for what HE does to his own body, they're the ... (read in full...)
I can't have an orgasm during normal sex
Q. Ok so this is an explicit topic but I need advice on something, that's obviously why I am here. I am worried that I am loosing my sexual stamina. I am a 21 year old female and I have never had an orgasm by a mans penis. the only way I can orgasm is ...
A. 20 May 2013: I'm sorry but I completely disagree with Person12345. Squirting isn't "just a party trick" and some women find that female ejaculation means better, stronger orgasms. Some women find that the only good orgasms they have are when they squirt. That ... (read in full...)
Should I participate in hanky panky with a colleague while out of town?
Q. Just feeling a bit naughty I suppose. Soon I will be going out of town to San Diego for a 4 day class and conference. My husband has declined to join me so I am thinking of sharing a hotel room and bed with a very nice attractive young gentleman in ...
A. 20 May 2013: Ask your husband first.
Come back and let us know how well THAT goes down. We'll wait.... (read in full...)
Is it a harmless foot fetish?
Q. Ok so the guy I'm dating now is the Absolute most affectionate man I've ever been with the sex is good and very Passionate and I love him to peices but there is just one thing he loves FEET he Literately loves to put my feet in his mouth all the ...
A. 20 May 2013: Foot fetishes are generally harmless, however, you need to set boundaries if the behavior makes you uncomfortable sometimes. Make sure that you have him ask before he does it, so that you can judge whether or not you're okay with it. I can imagine ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend maintains a friendship with a woman who has a crush on him
Q. There is this girl my boyfriend has been talking to online. I found out she has a huge crush on him and has been trying to hook up with him for weeks now. What's worse is that I found out she sent him a naked picture. I'm upset because even tho...
A. 19 May 2013: He's enjoying this girl's inappropriate attention. You two are in a relationship and this is hurting you, it's unacceptable behavior because it's crossing your boundaries.
Were I you, I'd give him two choices...you, or her.
... (read in full...)
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