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*amuraiRick agony aunt

*amuraiRick

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*amuraiRick's profile:

I am the Rocky Balboa on this website because I am dead brutal and pull no punches sometimes. I know its costs me popularity points, but better that I get my point out and be honest than try to be fake just to have people like me.

But don’t get me wrong…I am a nice guy. If you are good people, I got nothing but love and respect for ya. But when I get brutal it’s with people that come on here wanting sympathy and advice when they are totally wrong. I’m not a doctor, and you aren’t paying for me to be on your side, so if I hit you hard, maybe it’s because you need to do some thinking. I’m a man and this is how my dad taught me to be a man.

So ladies, if you see me giving out advice to other guys who basically deserve a punch in the face, just cover your ears stand back and let me at ‘em!!

But anyway…

I came here looking for a little fun and advice on a personal matter, but it turns out I’m seeing a lot of people out there with some serious and even ridiculous problems, things I am eminently qualified to answer and respond to with the experience I have. I’ve done a lot of dating in my time, been in all sorts of relationships; married too. Right now I’m finally divorced, and I’m in my right mind and doing things the right way. I have a lot good going in my life and I thank God every day I’m still alive kicking and living the best life I possibly can.

My motto is you have to live the life you love, and love the life you live. I always check with myself making sure I live by that motto.

But hey, now that I’m fresh and back into the dating thing again, I might be a little rusty, so I’ll be back here with who know what kind of questions that come up. But I feel I’m better armed than I was years ago, and I’m not about to make the mistakes I made in the past…not that I made any huge mistakes, but I had me a few nonetheless. The way I see it, mistakes you make can turn into opportunities, so never live with regrets.

Yeah, I was married once, and pretty recently. I don’t consider my past marriage a mistake, and I’ll tell you why. I learned and grew from it. What I take from that relationship has improved me as a man and makes me better for future relationships. I am not mortal enemies with my ex, and any hurt we had between us is in the past.

*********

Be good, Nikki!

Latest articles:

Valentine's Day when we are in between relationships...

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

14 February 2008: Valentine's Day s____. That’s right I’m saying it. Here is a day dedicated to love. For most the holiday celebrates the love between two people together and in romantic love. It’s a wonderful day for lovers. But for those of us not in l...

A child asked me if I was God...

This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

19 January 2008: I know the following story has nothing to do with relationship advice but it is a very personal event that happened to me on this day. Since I have no significant other to share this with now….I will share it with you readers and fellow agony ...

Happy Birthday, Bra!

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

28 November 2007: Today November 28, 2007 is the 100 year anniversary of the bra! Seriously now, how awesome is that! It’s the greatest most underrated invention of our time. I mean how great is the bra? Without it women would have saggy bags like you see on ...

< Prev1234567Next > [7 pages, 253 answers]

He cut me down to size...but I want him back...will he come back??

Q.   At first he asked for space, then he wrote me this after I wrote and told him that I was not handling the break-up well after he had kept blaming me for everything going wrong and wripped me down to shreds. I told him that no one had ever cut me ...

A.   12 February 2008: He doesn’t exactly make it clear, but what he wants is a break up. So give him the space he needs. This may be temporary, but give it some time. He doesn’t like your sudden change of character and the insults you gave him. I’m sure he’s hurt you ... (read in full...)

Can we get over the fact that we've each slept with other people?

Q.   Ive just started dating this guy a few months ago and everything was going great till we told each about sexual history let's just say at 19 he's had ten times about sexual partners i have, (3) or so he claims, and he knows im Bi but when i told ...

A.   9 February 2008: You are a perfect illustration of why you can't be totally honest about everything in a relationship. You are paying the consequences of playing the honesty game. Sexual history is one if those things you shouldnt discuss openly unless you are sure ... (read in full...)

What do men mean when they describe their wives or girlfriends as "controlling"?

Q.   What do men mean when they describe their wives or girlfriends as "controlling"? If a man isn't exactly complaining, yet that is the 1st word he uses to describe the wife/GF, is this a compliment? Hate to sound so stupid, but I'm serious and need to ...

A.   9 February 2008: I think its natural for most women to be controlling. I dont know if you can call it a compliment ...I would call it a basic trait. In any case i can't begin to understand it. Interestingly, you sound like a controlling woman for even asking t... (read in full...)

How do I move on after seeing my wife cheating??

Q.   My wife cheated on me last April. I walked up on it they where in the back seat on her suv at a bar. Im having trouble getting over it. At first she said they where just talking and a month after that i found out it was more. She tells me it was j...

A.   9 February 2008: A betrayal like this is not something you get over or move on from. How can you forget seeing your wife have sex with this man in an suv? That's an image I can never shake off. I wouldn't... and I dont know where to begin to forget it. So yu... (read in full...)

Why am I so scared of SEX!!!

Q.   Hi, I am 20 year old male and it might be funny I had a lot of chances for sex, but I never got the guts to. Here is a bit of background. I am bi and no one in my family knows about it and I am probably more gay than bi but I want a family and chil...

A.   8 February 2008: Like the previous guy said, I think you are full-blown gay and don't want to admit it. If you can't get an erection...foreplay or not, it means quite simply girls don't turn you on. So you should just face that admit it and just be happy being ... (read in full...)

What "nick" names do ladies like to be called?

Q.   What do you ladz like to be called in a relashionship? e.g girls mostly get called babe...

A.   5 February 2008: Excuse me here...but to all the wonderful previous aunts...the question was posed by a girl wanting to know what she thinks GUYS like to be called. Since I am a guy I will answer her question..as a guy, which I happen to be. My answer is just abo... (read in full...)

She will not stop being friends with a male friend I dislike... is her love not as much as mine is for her?

Q.   why is my gf acting this way. we've been dating for a year now...silly things wants her to stop the relationship. i love her to death and she's the only girl i want cannot imagine my life without her. it happened like 5 times she want to put an ...

A.   5 February 2008: Ok, I’m just going to make this crystal clear so you can focus on what really matters here. Friendship is friendship. But when one of the friends, the guy in this case, is in LOVE with the other, it’s a fire waiting to be started. She wants it to ... (read in full...)

We argue because he buys a paper with 18 year old topless girls. Got opinions?

Q.   Need your opinion!! Just found out my boyfriend who is 34, reads the Sun newspaper daily. He says he doesn't buy it for the page 3 girls but has admitted to having a look and reading the sleazy Deadries casebook. I feel very upset by this as I fin...

A.   5 February 2008: Topless girls in page 3? Dammmmmn! You guys do live in a different world. In America page three is behind the guy in the counter at 7-11. To get page 3 you have to pay five dollars cover and a mandatory drink. Page 3 in America is the middle ... (read in full...)

Why do boys my age act so... undignified? - Calling me nasty names, and swearing.

Q.   well,I have a question why do boys my age are so unworthy? See a today this boy named idiot came up to me and said f*** you.i was like what?and he said uhmm i didnt stutter.and then i was like what the hell? and he said did you want me to repea...

A.   4 February 2008: Boys do mature more slowly than girls for the most part. Its normal! And its also the reason girls tend to date older guys. You can't have a normal conversation with someone who blurts out insults for no reason. I wouldn't be surprised if their ... (read in full...)

We had sex and then we broke up! Can I really be put in jail because of this?

Q.   Ok, I was dating this girl for over a year, and we had sex a few months ago. Just recently (last night) we broke up, I do love and care about her, I just felt like the relationship was far too serious, and I did not want to be in anymore. After we ...

A.   4 February 2008: The laws are different state to state. But most states have the legal age for kids to have sex at 16. It could be considered sexual assault since you're older than her. Stay away from this girl. She sounds like trouble and the fact that shes even ... (read in full...)

Squirting or urine?

Q.   hi i was wondering if anyone could help my bf was recently playing with me and i felt as though i needed the toilet and then all of a sudden i felt like a release and when i looked on the bed i realised i had squirted but it was like a yellow colour ...

A.   4 February 2008: If it looks like urine and smells like urine..its urine. ... (read in full...)

22, My mother is ruining my life! What should I do?

Q.   I have one more question for the day/night. Ok. My mother treats me like a 2 year old and I'm actually 22 and she baby-sits me and she won't let me do things like go out with my friends or anything. I have to come home at 10 or before she gets home ...

A.   3 February 2008: You cant really do much about your mother's controlling attitude. What you can do is move out! How can you say your mother doesnt let you move??? She doesnt keep you chained. Of course you can move. Its all on you to make the decision, pl... (read in full...)

Can you get pregnant while being on top during sex?

Q.   can you get pregnant while being on top during sex?...

A.   25 January 2008: If salmon can swim upstream jumping over raging waterfalls to do a little spawning, I think the little sperm dudes should have no problem doing the same in a less challenging environment. Even if you think gravity can keep them from reaching the ... (read in full...)

For men: do you think of your partner during masturbation?

Q.   For the guys: Do you think of your girlfriend/wives when you masturbate?...

A.   25 January 2008: Yes...and no...If I'm a relationship I will think of my partner. But I will sometimes fantasize about other women. I think I'm not alone in this. When you're masturbating it’s pretty much about fantasizing. It could be someone famous, a singer ... (read in full...)

Does she just want to move in for sex??

Q.   I have been having sex with my girl friend for last 3 months. We both love lot of sex and we both get it..but since recently my gf is asking me if she can stay with me living together...but im worried is this just because of sex or does she needs me ...

A.   25 January 2008: Is having a girl moving in with you just for sex a bad thing? Wheres your head at man? She wants you and desires you and wants more of you in a regular basis. I still ask what is the problem with that. If its moral reasons why are you screwing ... (read in full...)

Did the guy I like have a one night stand or not?

Q.   hi. I like my flatmate at uni and recently, through a stupid mistake, he has found out that i like him. So now he nows how i feel. However, since he found out he has not backed off at all...like instead of starting to keep a slight distance, as ...

A.   25 January 2008: I believe they did have sex with each other. But I wouldn't call it a one night stand. They are perhaps friends from long ago, and it’s very likely they had sex previously. Is it love?...who knows. If it were serious he would have said so, but ... (read in full...)

Do guys compare their girlfriends to the girls in porn?

Q.   do guys compare their girlfriends to the girls in porn? I was just wondering because my boyfriend watches porn all the time and lately I have had a hard time in bed because I am worried that I am not attractive enough because he'll be thinking...

A.   25 January 2008: I personally never compare women I date with porn stars...although I have known a few that could have been good in porn (I mean good in bed). Porn is fantasy and I don’t expect any woman to compare to them. Yes some porn stars are hot; that’s why ... (read in full...)

He's divorcing me and with a new woman...so why is he calling me for phone sex?

Q.   Why would my soon to be ex be calling me for phone sex when he is supposedly into a new woman and relationship and has asked me for a divorce? He lives in the UK and we returned to the US and he continues to call me, even from her house! Help ...

A.   22 January 2008: It means he's a HO and you should be glad to be rid of him!... (read in full...)

Politics is coming between us. What can I do?

Q.   Help! I’m in a little trouble here with my wife and politics. I’m a republican and conservative and I plan on voting for a republican candidate in the primaries and eventually the November vote. My wife is a strong supporter of a certain candidate ...

A.   22 January 2008: I had to add a little response to the statement "Very few women understand politics" Wow...!! This is not the forum to discuss politics, and as i said earlier I just didnt want to go there. But I can't agree with that line. I happen to know a ... (read in full...)

I'm an artist, but men see me as a sex object. How can I make them take me seriously?

Q.   I want to advance in two creative fields, music and writing, but when I try to ask advice to males in those fields or send them my work, they often seem to think I'm trying to "come on" to them or make a pass or something. This isn't true, as I love ...

A.   19 January 2008: I don’t think you should go so far to say these guys treat you like a sex object. Just because a guy flirts with you doesn’t mean he sees you only as a sex object. You could be attractive and look nice…but maybe they see something more in you that ... (read in full...)

Politics is coming between us. What can I do?

Q.   Help! I’m in a little trouble here with my wife and politics. I’m a republican and conservative and I plan on voting for a republican candidate in the primaries and eventually the November vote. My wife is a strong supporter of a certain candidate ...

A.   19 January 2008: Thank you, thank you, and thank you for all your responses. I am overwhelmed. Well to those of you who know me you are probably wondering what gives…aren’t you already divorcing her? Well the truth is I AM divorcing her (official next month)…and ... (read in full...)

I want this girl to date me! how do I ask her though?

Q.   hiii my name is Tony and i need some help pleas, i am 17 years old from UK when i look at this web and i think that you are the one to help me :D This is the problem, i had fancy a girl for about half a year now and i plan to ask her out on Valen...

A.   18 January 2008: Before you do any of all that gift giving you have to TALK to the girl. Get into a conversation with her...and somewhere along the line ask her for her PHONE NUMBER. After that you talk to her more....and then you ask her out. That's how its done ... (read in full...)

Do I have a realistic plan?

Q.   Ok. I'm 16, and yes sexually active. I'm on birth control, and were having unprotected sex, but he pulls out. My bf is 21. I graduate in a year and a half, when I'm seventeen. If I do happen to get pregnant I have it all planned out.. Just because ...

A.   18 January 2008: I agree with Mr Kermit here. Your plan is absolutely not realistic. You are talking about going to school, maintaining a job And taking care of a baby at the same time. You've got it all wrong, sister. That's too much to handle, and something ... (read in full...)

Just want to tell everyone and the whole world....I'M IN LOVE!!

Q.   im in love wooooooo! im aware this isnt a question but i wanted to tell the world =]...

A.   18 January 2008: Okay, good for you. Woopee! Congrats go out to you. Now please don't make a fool of yourself and start jumping on couches!... (read in full...)

I'm afraid I can't find a girlfriend. I am tired of being alone!

Q.   please help i cant get a girlfriend despite making lots of effort being a male model. Im a 27yr old virgin and its seriously getting me down with loanliness, i dont know how long i can take this frustration. I know women like me to look at but im so ...

A.   17 January 2008: My God, man! You are a classic example to others that looks aren’t everything, and that women love men who are confident. You say you are yourself, as others say you should be…to be yourself and that doesn’t work…then do the opposite... (read in full...)

He spent mone at a strip club, I dumped his butt, now he wont speak to me, what is going on with him?

Q.   I recently broke up with my boyfriend of two years after finding out he spent a large amount of money at a strip club without telling me. I told him not to call me until he wanted to be honest about how he spent the money. He didn't call me for five ...

A.   17 January 2008: First of all, if you ask me his going to the strip club should not be the big issue that it’s being made up to be in this whole question. The problem with your relationship started long before he went there. Most everyone is quick to call him a ... (read in full...)

My husband told me to sleep with another man, I have and liked it,will we have problems?

Q.   my husband, of two years,. has given me permission to have sex with other men. i did not ask him for this, he just told me it was ok one day while we were raking the yard (why, when we were raking the yard...wouldn't bed be a better place...but ...

A.   16 January 2008: What is most important here is the happiness you and your husband have with each other and the arrangement you have, although it is not the norm. He asked you to do this, so he is apparently happy that you are doing it. Happy in the sense that he ... (read in full...)

HENPECKED!! How Do I deprogram a friend that seems to be controled??

Q.   Dear cupid, Our group of friends meet up every week, once a week to a local pub for seveal years now. We all enjoyed having a few drinks and listen to local music acts. We have always welcomed our single friend's new love interests. Now it seems t...

A.   15 January 2008: It could be the guy's is actually happy and the realtionship is working in spite of how his pub hopping behavior has changed. Ask him if he is happy...if he is then this is not a problem. Some relationships are just like that and still work for ... (read in full...)

Is it okay to be 'just' friends with a guy who wants to date me?

Q.   hi i have a boyf of 3 years who i love very much. but i have a male friend who i get along really well with, i dont have any romantic feelings for him but i know he does for me, but he knows i am with someone. we txt alot and see eachother on nights ...

A.   15 January 2008: No, its not okay, in my oppinion. The guy clearly wants a relationship with you, and if you go out with him, not only are you going to compromise your relationship with your boyfriend, you are definitely leading this guy on. Even as friends you put ... (read in full...)

Did I say something wrong? What else was I supposed to say? I don't understand why she reacted like that.

Q.   Hey weird fight with my girlfriend the other day and I am so confused. what is the appropriate response in this sort of situation: We went to a party at a mutual friends house. One of the guys there brought along a new girlfriend to introduce ...

A.   15 January 2008: This is one of those times when you have to LIE to your woman. This girl could have been prettier than your girl and you STILL have to lie! Its like the old "Do I look fat in this dress?" question. You Lie to her and say she looks great in the ... (read in full...)

How can you be sure somebody loves and cares for you before you have sex with them??

Q.   How can you know if a guy really loves and cares for you before you have sex with him? I have read that one should hold out a little longer until one is sure...but can one really be sure?? Only after the act can one know what the other person is ...

A.   12 January 2008: If you are waiting for a true declaration of love you can believe in, the wait could be long, maybe longer than your hormones can hold out. It would vary from one relationship to the next, but my general answer is three to six months...you could ... (read in full...)

Why is I seen as so acceptable for boys to masturbate but not girls?

Q.   why is i seen as so acceptable for boys to masturbate but not girls?...

A.   12 January 2008: The answer to your question has more to do biology then sociology. It seems like a lot of people, especially liberated thinkers, love to think that women and men are the same. Notice how every one was quick to answer "Oh yeah, were both the ... (read in full...)

Do you think it's ok for me to let my wife have another guy as her best friend??

Q.   I'm 32 and my wife is 28. My wife and a good friend of mine (male friend) are good friends. I think it would be safe to say that they are best friends (which is totally okay by me). My friends say I'm crazy to "be okay" with this. I disagree, ...

A.   11 January 2008: Collaroy makes a great point and I have to echo what he said. If I were this guy dating your wife and seeing as she is very attractive, I too would be doing everything in my power to get her in bed. I'm not just being the devil's advocate; I'm ... (read in full...)

He is the the first boyfriend that refuses to perform Oral, although it is the only way I can climax! Ideas?

Q.   My boyfriend won't go down on me because he doesn't like the way it tastes. I have never had this complaint before from past boyfriends, and I take care of myself with hygiene. What should I do? It is the only way I can climax......

A.   11 January 2008: Quick answer: Get a new boyfriend!... (read in full...)

We fell in love and everything seemed fine, then one day he just left. He refuses to talk to me and I don't know what went wrong, how can I move on from this?

Q.   My friend and I were very close for a long time and one day we felt in love.. We started dating and things were great after that.. We had ups and downs like any other relationships.. One day he just left.. I don't know what went wrong.. He refuses ...

A.   10 January 2008: What he did was just cruel. I don't know why some people resort to this form of breakup which i call the "silent" breakup. Its where they dont answer their phone won't return calls and just plain avoid you as a way of saying its over. I would ... (read in full...)

I want to blindfold him and talk dirty. What do I say?

Q.   Well the situation is that me and my boyfriend spend time together, but not much time alone together because of school, and work and we don't really have our own place. Well this week well tomorrow we finally have some time to be alone together. So ...

A.   10 January 2008: I'm going to make this simple for you. Use every dirty word in the book. And say the "F " word....a lot! ... (read in full...)

Does a bigger Penis mean better sex?

Q.   I can't stave off something that has made me massively insecure and jealous. My girlfriend of 3 and a half years recently broke up with me for another guy. It was the worst experience of my life, literally :( but it's been 4 months since then and ...

A.   10 January 2008: I know a lot of my fellow aunts are trying to be nice here, but the plain fact is that for a lot of women size DOES matter. Maybe you got stuck with one of those shallow size freaks. But she's obviously trying to push your buttons by comparing him ... (read in full...)

She cheated on me and I forgave her, but I think that she still likes him more than me. What do you think?

Q.   Hello! I have been with my girlfriend over a year now and we just had a relationship crisis. She cheated on me with some guy and told me about it. A know that she is sorry and would go back in time and not do it if she could and I love her very ...

A.   10 January 2008: Its one thing if she cheated made up for it and all is forgiven, but if she is still being deceptive with you, then its time you think about breaking up with her. If she is on her computer and has to hide her screen when you walk in, it’s just ... (read in full...)

What can I do for a romantic night in that won't cost a fortune?

Q.   Hi, I am having a few problems with my partner at the moment, so in order to show him I love him I was to arrage a romantic night in... I was wondering if anyone had any ideas of what I could do that wouldn't cost a fortune thanks...

A.   10 January 2008: If you can cook, make him a good meal. Nothing says loving more than a nice home made meal to fill him up. If you want to make it real sexy wear a simple short apron while wearing a matching bra and panties. Shut off all the lights, TV too, and ... (read in full...)

Do you think it's ok for me to let my wife have another guy as her best friend??

Q.   I'm 32 and my wife is 28. My wife and a good friend of mine (male friend) are good friends. I think it would be safe to say that they are best friends (which is totally okay by me). My friends say I'm crazy to "be okay" with this. I disagree, ...

A.   10 January 2008: Red flags are popping up and sirens are blaring here. Red alert! Red alert! I’m going to tell you straight out my friend….your wife is CHEATING on you. And I know from personal experience that having sex alone is not what cheating is all abou... (read in full...)

What gives guys the most pleasure in foreplay?

Q.   I'd love to give my boyfriend great foreplay, to get him excited for whats coming next. But I want him to enjoy the foreplay a lot too, and not just the sex. I feel he might only be doing it, with the intentions of getting it over quickly, so we can ...

A.   10 January 2008: I can't speak for other guys, and I may be in the minority, but good foreplay for me involves the pleasure I give my partner and not worrying about my pleasure. So for me as long as I am giving her pleasure my pleasure and desire is heightened in ... (read in full...)

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