How do I make the next move? I'm scared of rejection but when I do meet a woman I don't know what to say to get her interest
Q. I've been single for a while now. i'm not looking for a relationship just yet but am looking for casual sex. Thing is, I'm quite shy. I like to flirt with women and find this happens often, I just don't know what to say to take it to the next ste...
A. 28 February 2017: There is no one right way to make a "move" on a girl. Just be fun and friendly. Talk about interesting topics, reveal a bit about your personality, ask her stuff about her, tell an entertaining story.
Don't stress to much about looking for "cas... (read in full...)
I don't want to have a relationship with him but I'd like him as a friend.
Q. Me and my ex (who i've known my entire life) split up a year ago because he started to treat me bad and was showing signs of unfaithfulness. However, a year on me and him were supposedly over the relationship and he requested that we be friends. We ...
A. 29 January 2017: He very clearly wants to have you around for sex. He even went straight for the dirty talk.
You don't want him around for that, and want a "friend" instead? For what purpose? Think he'll listen to your day to day activities? Give you advice? ... (read in full...)
When will he tell me he loves me, I don't want to say it first this time?
Q. When can I expect my boyfriend to tell me he loves me? What are some signs that will indicate that he feels that way? (even if not saying it) I'm well on my way to falling in love with him, but don't want to say it first this time. I have sai...
A. 29 January 2017: It's all about time. Despite having dated and been with multiple girls, I've only told one girl I love her and that was my first girlfriend. We had been going out for 8 months and I didn't want to say it if I didn't mean it.
Take it as a positive... (read in full...)
Should I give up on men? Is there such a thing as a normal guy? I want a relationship with a man.
Q. I have have asked for advice before here and wanted to come back a year later to ask maybe what I am doing wrong. I am a woman in my early 30s that has given up on love. I have only been with three men and two had a relationship with. Through t...
A. 29 January 2017: I've been there too, just from the opposite side of the fence. My first girlfriend (who happened to be my first kiss and first sexual partner), cheated on me after being 2 years together when I was away during summer vacation. My second girlf... (read in full...)
I am over chasing men. But without a man in my life, then how can I be happy?
Q. It seems since I have been 17 years old I have been chasing men. 13 years later an two bad relatiosnhios and a broken home(my parents are miserable together) I have had enough. A little back story ( since my early twenties I have done everythi...
A. 29 January 2017: Not chasing men and being open to seeing them are different things though. Just because you aren't chasing them doesn't mean you're going to be alone the rest of your life.
And you're on the right track, don't hang out with people who bring yo... (read in full...)
He lacks a stable job and a career so I'm breaking up with him. Am I not openminded?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've put a lot of consideration into this and I've decided to break up with my boyfriend. It's not that we don't get along - we get along rather well and have a great time together. He is positive I will be his future wife and has info...
A. 22 January 2017: Agreed. The dude is living like is 15 years old. You don't want to deal with that. ... (read in full...)
Was he wrong for hitting me or am I being dramatic?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together 8months, I was pulling a silly face he didn't like and to stop me doing it he slapped my face, not hard by enough to shock me a little. He knows how I feel about face slapping (from previous bedroom antics) ...
A. 22 January 2017: That is NEVER EVER okay.
Break up with him. Immediately. It's only going to escalate and get worse.
You deserve so much better than an idiot who hits women. ... (read in full...)
He went out of his way to get my number but never called
Q. Ok on a friday night at the gym i noticed this guy looking at me and well there was a mutual attraction. He kept looking at me the whole time i was there. I had gone into the hall to take a break and he passed by me as he was leaving and passed b...
A. 22 January 2017: Sometimes a guy will get a girls number and then decide not to call her because someone else turned up.
He may still call, but I mean, at that point you're plan C or D.
Don't expect him to call and keep acting normal around him like you hav... (read in full...)
Why can't I shake this crush?
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles.. I'll make this as quick as possible.. I have been working at my company for 8 months now. I have a few bosses here, but there is one in particular who I am so incredibly attracted to. From the minute I met him in our ...
A. 22 January 2017: Anonymous said it best, he is being very inappropriate. ... (read in full...)
She has decorated my bedroom space with love letters and trinkets and it's suffocating. What can I say and how should I approach this subject?
Q. I am in quite a new relationship with my girlfriend (just over 6 months) and things have been going well. Although recently she has started to decorate my bedroom with photographs, love letters and little trinkets. It is sweet, do not get me wr...
A. 22 January 2017: Maybe meet her halfway? Keep the smaller things just so she doesn't think you're embarrassed by her.
...And the other more sneaky option is to put everything up when she's around and take it down when she's not. But that is really annoying... (read in full...)
How should I handle this situation? I think something is going on between my mom and my husband
Q. I think there’s something going on between my mom and my husband !! I know this sounds impossible but it seems true !! And I want to get to the bottom of it but don't know how !! My mom's visiting us and it has been here for the past 2 months !...
A. 22 January 2017: Holy crap this sounds horrible! I would follow the advice the others have left. This is a terribly complex and bad situation, I seriously wish you well! ... (read in full...)
Christmas gift gone wrong
Q. For Christmas this year, my BF got me a weekend at a winery with tour, tasting, and live music. We were so excited to get away for the weekend. I was almost in tears over such a thoughtful gift. It was our first Christmas together and the 1st ...
A. 22 January 2017: Sorry about that.
But if he is in mourning and he is also unemployed, he definitely doesn't want to be thinking of getaway vacations at the moment.
Just be there for him. Don't worry, he'll come around. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his ex are now talking every day and I am not comfortable with it
Q. Hi there. Well something is bothering me and I don't know if it's ok for me to be upset or not. About a week ago, my boyfriends ex girlfriends grandmother died. Her and him haven't really spoken for the last year or so. But she called him to let him ...
A. 22 January 2017: Reading the headline made me uncomfortable.
Consoling his ex over her dead grandma is okay.
Calling her after that to "catch up" and tell you that it's totally fine is NOT okay.
Confront him about it. If he continues to insist that... (read in full...)
My previous LDR did not work. My current LDR treats me better. Based on how things are working out does this current LDR have a chance of working out for the best?
Q. My bf came down to visit me for a little while and we talked about the future. The thing is he is younger then me and much less stable then me. I guess when I started dating him, I should have walked away, but I couldn't and we fell in love. ...
A. 13 January 2017: He sounds like a really romantic and nice young man. I say enjoy it.
However, if he is significantly younger than you (more than 5 years), watch it. He may be saying things he doesn't really mean just to be with you because men enjoy the company ... (read in full...)
Will sex ruin the relationship or make it better?
Q. Male(21) Hi..I am 21 and she is she is younger than me. We are in a relationship since last 7 months.We meet frequently.And now I think we both are ready for getting physical. I am confused is sex good for our relation or will it ruin our relation...
A. 13 January 2017: Depends on the situation. If you're in that traditional society, perhaps that means she is expecting marriage afterwards.
In any case, if you're ready to start a physical relationship, make sure you're on the same page with her. Do you want a k... (read in full...)
Why does my wife come home wearing different colored panties? Is she fooling around?
Q. So I have a strange feeling that my wife may be fooling around. Whenever she goes by her GF place, she always comes home with different panties on. Am I wrong for having these thoughts that there could be something here?...
A. 5 December 2016: That's a definite red flag. Why would she need to change panties? ... (read in full...)
Like him but he has a girlfriend
Q. I've been talking to this guy for a while now. It's been going really well and then he asks me on a date. However, we didn't be go on it because I found out he has a girlfriend. I've said I can't do this and we shouldn't talk. The problem is,...
A. 5 December 2016: Pursue it if you want to be the next girl he does this too. So I'd say it isn't worth it. ... (read in full...)
Should I meet up to talk to him after he said he didn't want to be with me anymore?
Q. I was with this boy for a few months and he basically said that he's changed so doesn't want to be with me. I dunno if I should go meet up and talk or to just let him go. I've never loved someone as much as I love him. He is my true love and he...
A. 5 December 2016: Move on. You're not even old enough to vote. Trust me you will find plenty of other awesome guys in your life. ... (read in full...)
Was this meaningless or is J trying to get me to notice her in some way?
Q. I have a friend who lives abroad and we talk a lot on Facebook. I went over there to visit her and met her friend who didn't speak much English (codename J). We were all out together and had a good time, but the language barrier could be an issue...
A. 5 December 2016: It's a little pointless to pursue considering that she lives abroad and you don't speak the same language. That being said, just be sure to smile and be nice to her when you're there, she may be up for some fun. ... (read in full...)
We had one date, thought it went great, but does it seem like she's blowing me off now?
Q. So I met this girl at a friends party two weeks ago. We talked for about an hour and I got her number. I asked her out via text, and she said she'd like to but couldn't that week because of a trip, but said she'd be up for it the following week. ...
A. 2 October 2016: Thanks for your advice!
So after a couple weeks of texting back and forth we finally went on a second date. It was a hike by where she lived.
I thought things went well, but apparently she didn't
She pretty much stopped texting back. Ab... (read in full...)
Is he rejecting me?
Q. so me and a guy have been talking for a long while. i am 19 now, we've been talking since i was sixteen. i went out once with a group of friends and he is a friend of theirs, he just showed up and we had never met before. he showed up, greeted me ...
A. 3 February 2016: You've made your opinion clear. He will ask you out again if he is interested. Don't press the issue or it will make him think you are desperate for his attention. ... (read in full...)
I met him on Tinder and am wondering what he is aiming for?
Q. Hello everyone! I need some advice. I've met a guy on Tinder (an app that has a certain reputation) a week ago. He was quite friendly, charming and caring. We talked about our hobbies, school (we're enrolled in university) and just general stu...
A. 3 February 2016: Make sure to meet at a public place if you do decide to see him. Just to make sure you are being safe.
Switching to sex talk so early before he has even met you is not a great sign that he wants something more than just that. ... (read in full...)
Text sent to me from an unknown number. If it's her, what should I do?
Q. My best friend and I have been close for nearly three years now. We've always been comfortable around each other to divulge personal secrets. In the beginning, I did have a crush on her. I thought she was gorgeous, still do. Over time, I realized...
A. 3 February 2016: I'd say call her on the phone you do have and just say "I got your text." If she proceeds to say what text? You have your answer.
And if she starts declaring her love, well congrats dude! Long game paid off. ... (read in full...)
Dare I approach my midnight supermarket girl?
Q. I do my grocery shopping usually after midnight at one of the huge 24 hour supermarkets. At that time there are usually more workers(shelf stackers) than customers. Anyhow, the last one or two times that I went there was this girl working there. V...
A. 7 January 2016: Totally okay! You have a window of about 3-5 minutes before she might get a little worried about slacking off if there is ANY supervision, so you have two ways of going about it.
1) Talk to her a little every time you go there and around the 4th ... (read in full...)
Does this guy like me as a friend or more?
Q. Does he like me as a friend or more? I'm 16, he's 17. Lets call him Leo. We both attend the same church. And we are both black and dark skinned. It all started at a church sleepover. Leo was messing around with my friend Sarah and I. After a while ...
A. 7 January 2016: He's flirting for sure. A very odd and juvenile way of flirting, but it is what it is.
I'd say stop asking the "Why are you looking at me" questions. He's not going to say "Because I am attracted to you" because that would kill the vibe.
Just... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't like the expensive present I got from a female co-worker. What should I do?
Q. Hi all Where I work, its mostly with women and as a result I am friendly and comfortable around women,although my wife isn't too happy about it.There's one particular girl who I work very closely with and I'll admit i get on particularly well wit...
A. 7 January 2016: You want to stay married? Throw it out bro. ... (read in full...)
My friends are driving me crazy
Q. My friends are really beginning to annoy me but they're the only friends I have (I mean, people who hang out with me outside school that my parents aprove of). Lisa is the worst. I'll be going somewhere with her and she'll be driving because she ...
A. 30 November 2015: I think you need to find new friends. You don't seem to get along with any of them.
You seem more introverted and nerdier than them, and that's fine, but you need to hang out with your own crowd.
They are outgoing, manipulative, fl... (read in full...)
How do I know what this guy's intentions are?
Q. Last night wedding. I met a guy he was on the table infront of me. I felt attracted to him but the first time he asked me to dance i said maybe in a bit. I tend to be a bit guarded. Another guy asked me and i turned him down because the other guy ...
A. 30 November 2015: As a fellow guy, I too would've asked a girl I'm interested in seeing to my hotel room if I were at a wedding.
But that doesn't mean he is only after sex. Give him a shot if you like him, and if he pushes for sex after one date, then you have you... (read in full...)
I think he cheated, he's denying it and I don't know what to do
Q. Basically I found out My boyfriend cheated on me. We went to a freqklash together in June which is a rave and at about 1 in the morning he just left without telling me n was supposed to stay at mine. I thought it was strange. Then I got told about a ...
A. 30 November 2015: You can never trust him again. Period.
I was cheated on too, and despite that, it felt bad to break up with her I loved her dearly.
But you are better off without him. You don't need further evidence. You will find somebody else, I promise.... (read in full...)
A mutual friend warned me the guy I'm dating just wants casual sex
Q. I've been talking to this guy for about a month, and recently started seeing him for about a week. However, I don't know if he's looking for anything serious or not, and I don't want to ask and make things awkward. A mutual friend of ours, ...
A. 30 November 2015: Honestly, if he just wanted sex, he would've pushed for it already. He had you in his bed and he didn't pursue it. Don't worry about things like frequency of text messaging, the fact of the matter is that he is contacting you, and that indicat... (read in full...)
Paying on a date. Am I making this too big of a deal?
Q. Am I making this too big of a deal? I have been seeing one guy for about 3 weeks now. Everything is good and I really love to be with him, he wants to be with me, we have fun together and everything is easy and we just click. He is very caring...
A. 1 September 2015: Excellent pieces of advice from everybody here. My own two cents is that yes, it is off putting that he did not pay for your drink. That is what a gentleman does.
There may be reasons for it, playfully bringing it up next time it happens may give... (read in full...)
Boyfriend found out I cheated while messed up and ended things. Will I ever be able to make him forgive me?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together three years and we got engaged last year. We then went through a rocky patch, but then things were great again. Until two nights ago when I ruined everything. I was at a rave, and was off my face and took a ...
A. 1 September 2015: When I was your age I was in that same situation as your boyfriend. My then gf cheated on me with a coworker of hers a week before I returned from visiting my family. She said she got really drunk and regretted it immensely and would never do i... (read in full...)
First she flirted a lot. Now she's not replying. What should I do? Try to contact her asap this week, or wait until next week?
Q. I met a great girl at a friends party on Saturday. She just flew in from the other side of the country since she is moving here (I'm in LA) and we both had a ton of common interests. She started up the conversation with me, playfully hit my ...
A. 24 March 2015: Well I shot her a random text about 2 weeks later and we ended up going out for a drink.
It was then I realized she liked me as a friend and nothing more.
Thanks for the advice! And I'm all for calling, but in my experience, the girl doesn't... (read in full...)
First she flirted a lot. Now she's not replying. What should I do? Try to contact her asap this week, or wait until next week?
Q. I met a great girl at a friends party on Saturday. She just flew in from the other side of the country since she is moving here (I'm in LA) and we both had a ton of common interests. She started up the conversation with me, playfully hit my ...
A. 22 January 2015: Thanks for the advice everyone! I'll contact her one more time.
I really do want to call her. But nowadays girls almost never ever answer, and I was wondering if I should just text instead.
The alternative is to call and text if she doesn't a... (read in full...)
How do I break up with my boyfriend of five years?
Q. I want to break up with my boyfriend of 5 years but just don't know how to do it. I've been wanting to end it for some time now, but don't know what to say, how to say it, where to say it?? I'm just dreading the whole thing. The thing is we met...
A. 21 January 2015: I've been in a similar situation. 1 - Condense your list of negatives to two problems that cover the rest. 2- Definitely do it in person. I broke up at her house, but if you are afraid of possibly being guilted into break up sex, do it... (read in full...)
Met A Guy I Really Like, But Not Good Enough For A Relationship...
Q. I joined a sports club today, and met a guy I really, really liked, even after talking to him once. We have a lot in common and he's really nice and flirted with me a bit. I will be seeing him twice a week there. I was really nervous around h...
A. 21 January 2015: WiseOwl phrased it perfectly. Don't worry about it so much. It sounds like you two might hit it off, so enjoy your time with him. Good luck! ... (read in full...)
I can't tell from the situations if she's interested in me or not
Q. Hello, I am currently very interested in a girl I met in a class about a week ago, and I am left wondering what my next move should be. I am 21 years old, she is 20. So my main question is: "Is this girl interested in me, and if she is,...
A. 21 January 2015: I didn't text her or call her, and it turns out she wasn't interested. Thanks for the feedback man!... (read in full...)
I need the followup text to the girl I met! Help!
Q. Last night was my first time at a nightclub in LA and a girl came up to me within my first 5 minutes of being there and asked if I'd like to come dance with her friends (it was one of her friends bachelloretes party) I complied and she started ...
A. 21 January 2015: Fun tidbit, I texted her a couple weeks ago (about 3 years after this happened) and she completely forgot we even met and sent me a picture of her two kids. Crazy huh? ... (read in full...)
Am I reading too much into his slow responses?
Q. Hi thanks for reading. I recently went on pof and have started texting this guy for about s a week, but for past few days it takes him ages to reply. ( like 4 hours) But when he does they are nice messages and I reading too much into it or is he ge...
A. 21 January 2015: It'a part of the stupid dating game. If he replies too quickly you might see him as "desperate" or "too interested" and lose interest yourself. He does that to you specifically so you are thinking "Why isn't he texting back? Does he like me?"
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is ruining our relationship with video games. How do I get him to stop?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 7months, and we are in a long distance relationship. We see each other for 2 weeks a month, so we get to see each other as much as we can. Things were going fine, but he is very addicted to video games, and he's 27 ...
A. 21 January 2015: Dump him. I'm a gamer too and he is being stupid obsessive. Do you really want to keep dealing with that? Men don't change, especially their gaming habits. And you're also in an LDR on top of everything. I was in one for a year and she ended up ... (read in full...)
Should I give up on this girl? She's come up with all kinds of excuses for why we can't get together.
Q. I am very close to giving up on this girl and I just want to see if I should or if there is still hope. I met her a couple months ago at Wondercon, we connected well and I got her number. After a couple text exchanges (with very delayed response...
A. 21 January 2015: Update!
She finally texted me back after I texted her saying I can't seem to guess when she's free, and to let me know if she'd like to hang out again sometime.
She said "I'm busy this week, but we can hang out next week as friends"
I ma... (read in full...)
I need the followup text to the girl I met! Help!
Q. Last night was my first time at a nightclub in LA and a girl came up to me within my first 5 minutes of being there and asked if I'd like to come dance with her friends (it was one of her friends bachelloretes party) I complied and she started ...
A. 11 June 2012: Yeah...so it looks like it was kind of a one night thing. I texted her, got nothing, tried calling her a week later, and still got nothing.
Oh well. Thanks for the advice!... (read in full...)
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