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*iot2017

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< Prev1234567Next > [7 pages, 220 answers]

I cant break up with her because she threatens self harm.

Q.   Hi, So I've been dating my girlfriend for about 3 years total now with some time in between here and there. I've been on the fence about breaking up with her for the entirety of this summer but I haven't been able to act on it because she is s...

A.   14 August 2017: You guys need to go to therapy. Her attempts to suicide are just ways to keep you in the relationship, it's a form of manipulation and for getting others to do whatever she wants to do. That is not a very healthy adult relationship IMH... (read in full...)

His ex girlfriends stuff is still a his place!

Q.   I have been dating my bf for almost a couple months. He was w/his ex for a long time and still has her stuff tho its been awhile since they broke up. Her stuff is still there and I want it gone, I don't want her to have any hold on him. He has ...

A.   14 August 2017: Yes, don't damage anything. Don't let this slide. Like you mention, the longer her ex's stuff remain there, the longer you'll have troubles and the bigger troubles get. He need to learn to move on and focus on you, and not look back. He needs to... (read in full...)

How can I make my husband feel better about our sex life?

Q.   I am a woman of 50 years, I married 10 years ago. I was single for 40 years and naturally I had several sexual partners (26 men more precisely). The problem is that I have never had orgasms with my current husband. He is very dedicated in bed, not ...

A.   11 August 2017: Nancy, Please go to couples therapy. Your husband needs some one else to tell him that it's all right to have a normal size penis and that you love him and you want to have sex with him only. His insecurities are getting in the way of your rel... (read in full...)

How can I stop thinking of myself as a failure and get my life in order?

Q.   i've failed to establish any sort of relationships with women. I've never had any confidence in myself and always dreamed of having a girlfriend. I'll be honest and say that I felt that having a woman would somehow validate me. I know this is wrong ...

A.   11 August 2017: First of all, you need therapy, not because you lust young girls, but because you need help to build confidence. Second, you don't need money or looks to find a GF, but you do need a personality at least. If you go to therapy, you might be able to... (read in full...)

Wife won't share "our" car. Is she being unfair?

Q.   My wife doesn't work and hasn't for years despite us not having any kids. She quit her last job with my blessings. It was worth it to me just to not have to listen to her complain about it and I make a decent income such that she doesn't have to ...

A.   11 August 2017: Listen. If you paid for both cars, and the cars have your name on them, then you can use it. My advice, just take the car. Tell her that you are going to be using the car for the next 2 months, it's going to be temporary. You need to remind h... (read in full...)

Each time I nearly had sex I pulled back .... now we have split up!

Q.   Hi, Me and my now ex boyfriend broke up and it was a very hard decision for us to make because we love each other very much...We met about four months ago at work and we've been together for a month and a half before our break up. Everythi...

A.   11 August 2017: Many relationships break up when one partner is not ready to have sex. On my relationship with my GF, I waited more than a year to have sex with her, but that didn't stopped us from making out passionately. It's important for him to have sex ... (read in full...)

I've concerns about this LDR.

Q.   This guy has just asked me to be his girlfriend but dropped the bombshell that he's moving to Edinburgh for at least a year. We sorta agreed that we would try Long distance and everything was as good as it could be. However, the last few day...

A.   11 August 2017: I've been that guy your BF is. I have toxic parents, and at the start of my relationship with my GF we didn't told our parents, and we were on stealth mode. Also, there are times where we stay in very lengthy LDR, but we do communicate, at leas... (read in full...)

What to do with my cheating friend?

Q.   One of my girlfriends whom I have been friend for a year has had the tendency to sleep with men that are taken or take men from our circle - example one of our other gfs liked this guy at the bar and started talking to him- apparently he also liked ...

A.   10 August 2017: "Should I say something?" NO "Should I stop talking to her?" YES. Like that other person you know told you, if you ever find a guy you like and he is interested in you, she will try to sleep with him. You don't want to be hurt by her in your q... (read in full...)

Need to pee blocks my climax

Q.   I am having a personal issue with my husband and I feel like I'm loosing my mind. Every time things get "frisky" I want to finish, I feel like I need to, but I always get an overwhelming urge to pee; even though i use the bathroom right before we ...

A.   10 August 2017: I don't think there is a way to fix this, but there is one thing you both can do to walk around this: cover the sheets in plastic and/or place a giant towel below you. When you are climaxing, you need to LET IT GO, whatever that liquid is. Ask ... (read in full...)

We were getting on so well .... but now he just blanks me.

Q.   Is it time for me to give up? So I was seeing this man for a while, things were great and he told me he loved me and we talked about a future together. We met at work. All of a sudden he has now started blanking me, contact fizzled out apar...

A.   10 August 2017: Why do people just cut you off when they seemed so into you? One word: REBOUND. If you were a rebound relationship for him, and his ex came back and wanted something with him, he will likely pick his ex. Should I try talk to him? YES, BUT NOT ... (read in full...)

He seems a lovely guy but could I be missing something?

Q.   I have been communicating steadily with a man I met online now for around 6 months, but we have been also interacting on message boards now for more like 8 months. Things have progressed to us both being seriously interested in seeing if we could ...

A.   10 August 2017: "This guy is 59, has never been married" This seems very incredible, but possible. I can't believe he has never had any sexual relationship with those girls, but it could be true. Perhaps he has a small D*ck (which could be a problem for having ... (read in full...)

When its good its great but right now its bad.

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend now for roughly four months. It's long distance so things have gotten intense pretty quickly! We were planning to move in together but I felt it was too soon so I told him how I felt. Since then things have not been ...

A.   10 August 2017: You only know what the right thing to do is. If the situation with him is unbearable for you, you should move on. If you want to save that relationship, then I think you both should go to couple therapy, although is way too soon for a 4 mon... (read in full...)

My brother is about to be taken for a ride by an online Romanian stripper!

Q.   My older brother is marrying a 21 year old stripper from Romania to bring her to the US. He met her on a webcam girl site. It is likely a romance/green card scam. He is really in a mid life crisis (48) and this is totally out of character for him. ...

A.   10 August 2017: The stripper is after his green card and alimony, he needs to stop this nonsense before he ends up in the street and homeless! Marriage contracts are serious business, and men always the short end of the stick, so it's a terrible idea for him ... (read in full...)

His ex girlfriends stuff is still a his place!

Q.   I have been dating my bf for almost a couple months. He was w/his ex for a long time and still has her stuff tho its been awhile since they broke up. Her stuff is still there and I want it gone, I don't want her to have any hold on him. He has ...

A.   9 August 2017: You both need to meet in the middle. Your BF can't get rid of that stuff right now, and you can force him to get those things out. Meet in the middle. Get a large box ,and store all of that stuff in a single place, tape it well. Encourage him... (read in full...)

I've set boundaries on how much "help" I give my boyfriend and he doesn't like it!

Q.   Am I a hypocrite? Am I mean? I know for a fact I'm confused. My bf and I were recently laid off and have 60 days to find a new job. I've already updated my res and applied to 6 places. I have even looked for jobs my bf could apply to and hav...

A.   9 August 2017: You just got your answer here: "He has said that if he doesn't find a job before were let go that he wants to stream video games and possibly earn income that way." Your BF is not doing enough effort to get hired, because he is sabotaging h... (read in full...)

I blurted out I LOVE YOU to my married boyfriend. Why does he still want to be with me?

Q.   I told my married boyfriend of 3.5 years that I LOVE HIM yesterday. It just came out. I did not mean to say it but I did. He was asking me why do I stay with a guy like him? He called himself average, boring, not so attractive yet said I am ...

A.   9 August 2017: If he didn't told you that he loves you, it's because he does not love you. That doesn't means he does not appreciate you, but if it's love what you are after, you are with the wrong person. If your BF loved you that much and was unhappy enough w... (read in full...)

What makes a person act like my ex did?

Q.   I was dating a guy for about two years. Around April of 2017 he breaks off the relationship. I was being needy and angry during that time because I was in my senior year of college and it was finals. And my father had stage four cancer he got really ...

A.   9 August 2017: "who in their right mind would do that to another human being?" Rich spoiled kids. You see, think that break up as BLESSING, since that guy was probably not good for you, neither does his family. That guy had no regards for your feelings or ... (read in full...)

I ended the affair but he keeps contacting me

Q.   I have been involved with a married man for over 5 years....he said he's in a sexless marriage and his wife doesn't show him any affection....he can't leave her yet as he feels he would be abandoning his kids even though they are in their late ...

A.   9 August 2017: Hello OP, If he was that very miserable, he would have left his marriage a long time ago. Yes, it's likely that he is in a sexless marriage, but he may be afraid of making the jump and loosing the lifestyle he haves right now. A divorce is very ... (read in full...)

Savings for our house keep getting taken away by Mum in law

Q.   Hi cupids... I'm in a bit of difficulty at the moment and don't know if I'm being selfish...me and my boyfriend live together at his mums at the moment.. we are trying to save to buy a house together.. my boyfriends mum lost her job a few months ...

A.   9 August 2017: Lending money to family is the same as giving it as a gift, so you should never expect to have it back. Some people are able to successfully pull it, most don't. What I think you need to do is the following: - Move out your BF's mother. She is... (read in full...)

My love interest is ill .... is it worth waiting for him?

Q.   I am in my 30s and my love interest is in his 40s but we are just friends. I haven't seen him in a long time and have seen recently that his health is bad. He struggles to walk, has asthma and drinks. He randomly said to me he would not be able to ...

A.   9 August 2017: It's your choice at the end of the day, you know him better. If you feel like it's worth to give him a shot, by all means, go ahead. If you have your doubts and you feel that things aren't going to turn out well, then walk away. Also, if you ... (read in full...)

Should I leave my job to go work with my Ex boss, who I'm sleeping with?

Q.   I need some work related advice!! Back in March, I was working for a car dealership that I loved! But my GM, We'll call him X, ended up quitting and went to work at another dealership.. It's important to mention that the night he quit, we had se...

A.   9 August 2017: "I'm still torn, I'm thinking I should just wait it out at work and see what happens with this guy." Good decision, just take care from that guy that it's a risk on your current work. ... (read in full...)

I regret oversharing my private life

Q.   What do here? I feel I may have "overshared" at work telling a few people I am having surgery in the next 2 months. I have told a few people 9 (not everyone..! there are 20 others who don't know and wont...) I am having surgery soon, and I need...

A.   8 August 2017: What is done is done, and there is nothing you can change. My advice to you is: if you are private person like me, you should not tell anything to anyone. If you don't need to make people pity about you, don't tell that kind of stuff, regard... (read in full...)

Should I tell his girlfriend he's been having an online affair with me?

Q.   So I met a guy online and instantly fell for him. We live cross country so the chances of us meeting were pretty slim I guess. Still, he told me how much he liked me and wished he lived closer so I could be his girlfriend. At one point, he even said ...

A.   8 August 2017: Short Answer: NO Long Answer: It's not your duty nor job doing that. His GF is going to find out one day, you don't need to do anything. You are going to be causing him and her GF lots of problems out of the blue. Just let her find out by hers... (read in full...)

I can't handle my husband lying!

Q.   Recently my husband hasn't shown any interest in sex at all. He hasn't always been one of those men who want it all the time but sometimes it can be 2 weeks before he even shows the least bit of interest. I thought it was me, I have put weight on ...

A.   8 August 2017: Hello OP, It sounds to me that your husband is in the closet, or he is BI. Don't mind the stuff regarding incest and stepmother stuff. I don't know from which country you are, but each country haves it's own fetish with different kind of relation... (read in full...)

My ex bf contacted me, I told my bf about it, mistake or no?

Q.   I dated this guy briefly, but broke up w/him due to him being a control freak and somewhat mentally unstable. His number was blocked, but the other day I deleted all my blocked numbers (I didn't even know it was his number). He ended up messaging ...

A.   8 August 2017: Short Answer: No Long answer: Honesty and transparency are good ways to increase trust in a relationships. ... (read in full...)

Shy. It's making it difficult for me to develop a relationship with any women I meet. Any tips to help me get over my shyness?

Q.   I'm a guy who's grown up very shy and has recently become single. My shyness is only when it comes to taking things further with a girl- I get on with women, I flirt and am even brave enough to ask for the first date, but when it comes to making the ...

A.   8 August 2017: Shy guy here. Every girl has it's own pace. Some girls will let you move quickly, others will take a while. Step 1: Kiss her. Don't kiss her right away, but find a way for kissing her that seems natural or fun. Like "you got some food stuck o... (read in full...)

Is it normal for a 69 year old man to have only one topic he wants to talk about, namely his 30 year old divorced daughter. Is it worth continuing this relationship?

Q.   I am 54 years old and met a really nice man who is 15 years my senior. He is divorced and has two daughters one aged 34 and the other in her twenties. On our first date he made a toast to his eldest daughters success in getting a promotion. (i...

A.   8 August 2017: It seems like the guy is not interested in you or your life. He just want someone to talk about his daughter. You deserve better honestly. ... (read in full...)

How do I tell my boyfriend I'd like to watch him masturbate

Q.   I have a fantasy and I am not sure how to approach my boyfriend about it. I don't want him to think I'm weird/something wrong with me or to embarrass him. I know it is natural for men to masturbate and I have no problem with him doing it. However, ...

A.   8 August 2017: Just be upfront with him. Tell him what you really want, and how you want it. If he is an open person, he will gladly do it. ... (read in full...)

He lies about money, I am fed up with being his doormat!

Q.   I would love your opinions please on whether I am being unfair or judgmental. Me and my husband have been together for 15 years. Over the years I have caught him out in lies over money. About five years ago his aunt passed away, I knew she had left...

A.   8 August 2017: You need couple's therapy to help you two open up on that issue. Money is always a big issue on every relationship. You should encourage him to be more honest and upfront of what he wants and what you want. Money information needs transparency in a... (read in full...)

I hate being alone and will do almost anything so that I am not

Q.   A few weeks ago I posted a question about being reallyyyyyyy sad all the time I am an honours student in university, I have a great life at home, I am well off financially, and I have everything I need (not to toot my own horn but I have a ver...

A.   8 August 2017: I think you should see a therapist to help you cope with this issue. It seems like you are a very extroverted person, and you need to be around people to feel good. ... (read in full...)

Do abusers set out to deliberately hurt the self esteem of another?

Q.   Are there seriously people who will try to bring down a partners self esteem by making them feel bad about them self is making them feel too old for anyone else to want and not as attractive as other women ( or men ) etc . I ask because I've rec...

A.   7 August 2017: "Do abusers choose a person based on weakness and do they do it for fun . Do they ever have any feeling mga for the person at all other than contempt." Short answer, YES. Medium answer, YES, read about personality disorders: en.wikip... (read in full...)

How do I fix things and apologize in order to reconcile?

Q.   My ex who I broke up with about 5 months ago asked me if I wanted to hang out yesterday with her and her kids and we spent the whole day together playing in the pool and stuff at the house and cooking dinner. We have been good friends the last ...

A.   7 August 2017: I think you should be honest with her, and tell her you screwed things, and that you have been working on yourself to improve yourself, and that you will understand that if she doesn't wants you back in her life. Tell her what you feel about her and ... (read in full...)

I need to rephraze the question to my boyfriend

Q.   Me and my ex got back in contact September last year we split as he started too work away more then me finding out he met someone else and had a kid with her. Long story cut short he has split with this girl and we have started hitting things o...

A.   7 August 2017: You should ask those questions in person, and have a honest answer from him. Ask him what he thinks about you, and anything you want to know from him. If you want to have sex with him, take the initiative, and start sex. If he rejects you, ask... (read in full...)

My boyfriends suggestions are illogical and dangerous.

Q.   I had to travel for good to find a better life but he convinced me to comeback and live as a real couple with him. Back then our relationship has been starting we shortly met, no details , no long conversations, the looks and decent shy approach ...

A.   7 August 2017: Hello OP, It sounds like your BF has deep emotional and possibly mental issues. Has he gone through therapy? Has he looked for help for his emotional issues with a health professional? With what I have read in your post, there are MANY BIG RE... (read in full...)

How do I say no to my niece without destroying our relationship?

Q.   Great site with good advice. I thank all in advance who help me out here. My neice is an actor...kind of well known and I am looking forward to seeing her when I am in her part of the country at the end of August. I have sent her a few emails a...

A.   7 August 2017: Regardless if the make the film or not, your money is not going back. If you can afford it, and you really feel that it will work out even with their drug problems and mental health issues, go ahead. If you can't afford it, or you fee that... (read in full...)

Why would he want so badly to sleep with other women

Q.   My boyfriend of 3years. Experienced "Swinging" with his former spouse. Now he wants me to experience the lifestyle..saying I'll love it... Its really not something I have ever even thought about. Really doesn't interest me... But I suppose my ...

A.   7 August 2017: You husband wants a way for him to cheat you with your permission. He likes the thrill of having sex with multiple woman, even if they are not as beautiful as you. I don't think you should allow that if you are not into it and if you are in a com... (read in full...)

Boyfriends parents ignore me

Q.   Boyfriend's family makes me feel like a burden? I am cordially invited, but when I am there, I feel like I am in the way....

A.   7 August 2017: Don't take their invitations. They only invite you just for not being rude. But they really don't care about you being there, as it seems. That's the way toxic parents work. Only hang out with people that enjoy your company, otherwise, you are just... (read in full...)

Boyfriends parents don't like me

Q.   Boyfriend's parents likes other girlfriend better? Why do I get upset when my boyfriend's family always has the other brother's girlfriend tag along? I feel like I am missing out and it sucks....

A.   7 August 2017: Toxic parents discriminate against girlfriends for any kind of random reasons. If you aren't invited to tag along, is likely that they don't like you. I have toxic parents, and they discriminate against my girlfriend because she comes from a poor... (read in full...)

Why do I want attention all the time from men?

Q.   Why do I always enjoy attention from men I can't have? I am a single good looking girl (I'm not trying to be vain but just to paint a picture) and unfortunately I have not had luck in finding a loyal honest man- I have honest though that at work I ...

A.   7 August 2017: I think you need to work with a therapist to find the causes of that need you have for attention. Read more on this personality disorder, and see if you identify with it: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality_disorder If you depend 1... (read in full...)

How can I change my outlook on life?

Q.   How can I stop my negative approach to life? Has anyone overcome this negative outlook on life and if so how? I have been in therapy and it's clear to me that I'm a miserable woman (sad) but true nothing makes me happy- I myself am not happy - I ...

A.   7 August 2017: You have the answer to yourself in your own comment: "I feel like I'm scared to do what makes me happy" The day you start making what makes you happy, your outlook of life will change. You will then get surrounded by people that want what you wa... (read in full...)

We bought a house together but feel my fiance is taking advantage of me financially

Q.   My finance and I bought a house together at the beginning of the year. I paid for the entire down payment out of my savings account, with the understanding that he will pay me back for his half. In addition, I also put 25K into our joint account to ...

A.   7 August 2017: The real issue here is that your husband can't keep his promises, which is a bad thing. You need to : a) Cool down b) Gather courage c) Do a rehearsal of how and what you want to tell him d) Avoid getting angry or start crying. e) Execut... (read in full...)

Should I leave my job to go work with my Ex boss, who I'm sleeping with?

Q.   I need some work related advice!! Back in March, I was working for a car dealership that I loved! But my GM, We'll call him X, ended up quitting and went to work at another dealership.. It's important to mention that the night he quit, we had se...

A.   7 August 2017: The only person that haves enough information for taking the best decision is you. If you trust mr X and mr Y, and you think things are going to be well working with them, then go ahead and move. If you think that things with mr X are going t... (read in full...)

How can I make my husband feel better about our sex life?

Q.   I am a woman of 50 years, I married 10 years ago. I was single for 40 years and naturally I had several sexual partners (26 men more precisely). The problem is that I have never had orgasms with my current husband. He is very dedicated in bed, not ...

A.   2 August 2017: I would tell him that you really don't mind not having an orgasm through intercourse. If he is withholding sex from you, you can either have a serious talk with him and ask him to stop doing that. Or you can take the initiative until he feels co... (read in full...)

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