I don't think she is showing me her true self, her true life?
Q. hi there, first i would like to thank you all for your previous advises to heal my inferiority complex...this days something has happened to me...there was this girl whom we are working together in a bank...we begin it as a friend, we discuss on ...
A. 22 January 2009: No, she is not your real friend. This girl sounds like she likes to complain to whoever will listen, and you are simply another person who is in the audience of her life. If you don't enjoy listening, tell her you'd prefer not to hear about her ... (read in full...)
Was dropping out of uni the biggest mistake of my life?
Q. hi, im 21 and last year in january i dropped out of university. i have a lot of problems at home with my mum. she wants to control everything i do and she drinks a lot. she messes with my head so much. i convinced myself dropping out was the righ...
A. 22 January 2009: Who cares what anyone thinks? If you say you can do it, YOU CAN! Only you know your true limitations and potential. Other people say negative things when they're jealous of you, and your mom does it to manipulate you. Alcoholics love to ... (read in full...)
What does "wearing your heart on your sleeve" mean?
Q. Hey there Am justing getting to know a guy off the internet and he seems really lovely and funny. We were talking about relationships etc and he says he seems to get trampled on cos he wears his heart on his sleeve... what does that exactly mea...
A. 22 January 2009: It means that he tells you how he feels instead of playing games with you. I don't think it means he's needy, just that you'll always know where you stand with him.... (read in full...)
Is my boss opening up to me emotionally so that we can have a closer relationship?
Q. I'm in love with my boss and we have worked together for quite some time, we both shared personal details of how we had been mistreated in the past which resulted in both of us crying openly and at length in the privacy of his office, I told him I ...
A. 21 January 2009: Stay professional with your boss. I understand that you feel close with him, but you both DO have partners, and those people deserve to be honored in your lives prior to any other individuals.
I do believe he's putting "feelers" out to see how you ... (read in full...)
G/f & I broke up and its a pretty big mess
Q. Hey everybody. I'm actually new here so I hope u all can give me the best advice y'all can give. Ok I'm actually 17 yrs old n my gf, L, is also 17. We've known each other 4 actually a month now(I know it sucks) n we love each other very much. To ...
A. 21 January 2009: Sorry, but if it was really meant to be, you could make it happen. People cloud the crap out of their lives over such foolishness.
Be her friend if you can handle it and just that. If you all can make something work in the future, grea... (read in full...)
Is he an abuser? Am I? (verbal abuse that is). Help!
Q. Help! Did I make a mistake in ending our relationship? If I did, how should I rectify the situation? I read the link on warning signs of dating a loser (http://www.dearcupid.org/question/warning-signs-youre-dating-a-loser.html), and thought that...
A. 21 January 2009: You're awesome, Cat. We all do and say things we shouldn't, but if we're worth the ground we stand on, we're willing to try to change. He is not willing, and that speaks volumes.... (read in full...)
G/f & I broke up and its a pretty big mess
Q. Hey everybody. I'm actually new here so I hope u all can give me the best advice y'all can give. Ok I'm actually 17 yrs old n my gf, L, is also 17. We've known each other 4 actually a month now(I know it sucks) n we love each other very much. To ...
A. 21 January 2009: I'm sorry, that was so confusing.
She either wants to be with you or she doesn't. Why the wait for an SAT test? I understand someone saying they hate you in anger, but all of this garbage with friends and go betweens--- it's so grade scho... (read in full...)
Love feeling...
Q. A girl saw a picture of me and my cousin, a girl and said is it her rival. What did she mean by that? Is it she is in love with me but timid to express it or a joke. Please help because she has made several approaches towards me, like I'll be ...
A. 21 January 2009: I think you should talk to her. It sounds like she might like you, but since you haven't made a move, she isn't sure how you feel about her. She's dropping hints, probably hoping you'll ask her out, and when your friend calls her your girlfriend, ... (read in full...)
Now he's "damaged goods" I should have went out with him when I could have
Q. The boy I like now, liked me back in High School for 3 courses in a row. He asked me out several times but I never went out with him. I didn't want a boyfriend back then but now I started to like him. Unfortunately, I came to like him too late ...
A. 21 January 2009: Don't regret it- you did what you felt was right at the time.
It sounds more like you want what you can't have, which is completely normal. Now you've placed restrictions on him that he can never pass because firstly, you just didn't like him,... (read in full...)
I took my ex back, he lied has another girl
Q. hi there i need advice I have a problem with my bf, we have been together for 2yrs now, we having our ups and downs, last year it happens dat we break up but he asked me to come back to him and tell me that he does'nt have gf. i found out that h...
A. 21 January 2009: Who do you love more? Him, or yourself? Who knows what he's doing with this other girl, what kind of diseases she has, etc... and he's willing to spread them to you as well.
This man doesn't even respect himself, let alone you.
... (read in full...)
Ex still cares for me and wants fwb..I am unsure
Q. I'm feeling a bit lost and confused. My ex Doug and my ex best friend Lily went out behind my back soon after we broke up. This was quite a while ago. It took me a long time to forgive them but i realised it was better to let go of the anger i had ...
A. 21 January 2009: I wouldn't settle with fwb unless that's what you want.
Do you want to be with this guy? You sound like you're more concerned with what he wants than what you want.
Go with your gut... you know him better than your friends do.... (read in full...)
Does she like me, or are we just good friends?
Q. I've liked a certain girl for 2 years now. When we met, we were always arguing through emails. Half a year later, we became friends because one of her friends (who now lives in queensland) had a crush on me. The girl i like began to be very frien...
A. 21 January 2009: Yes, she feels the same way. Tell her how you feel!!!... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says I whine
Q. so my boy friend says i whine but i dont believe i am when he says i am we use to be like best friends now i feel like were barley friends i feel like all he care's about is playing video games and smoking w/ his friends i no im kinda clingy but ...
A. 21 January 2009: I think you need to get a life of your own instead of hanging out with him all the time.
You probably do whine, all girls have the tendency to sound a little whiny when they get emotional.
Anyways, if you get your own interests, you won't be... (read in full...)
Am I just reading too much into his actions?
Q. hey guys, im really confused by the mixed signals a very good guy mate "tom" is giving me...and i dont know how to respond. im a very out going and friendly girl who never stops talking, ive been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and i am very ha...
A. 21 January 2009: Nope, he definitely has more than just friendly feelings. Don't go solo with him anywhere so you don't give him the wrong idea.... (read in full...)
Unhealthy to immediately kiss after oral sex?
Q. I've heard that it can be really 'unhygenic' if you have oral sex and kiss immediately afterwards. Obviously I don't need an explanation as to why lol, but was wondering if there's any risk of catching something (not neccessarily STDs) and if there ...
A. 21 January 2009: Hmmm.. I'm no expert, but I would make sure they don't have any herpes outbreaks, and no cuts inside of either of your mouths.... (read in full...)
I should leave him but feel bad about it? Why?
Q. I am 21 years old, and i am currently dealing with this situation. I have been in a relationship with my ex boyfriend for two almost three years. I have dealt with all the usual problems most women have dealt with when you are with an abusive man. ...
A. 21 January 2009: Oh you poor baby...
Now listen up! I work in law enforcement, and NOTHING pisses of off more than woman who goes back to an abusive boyfriend/husband again and again. His behavior is increasingly becoming more violent, and girl, some day it's... (read in full...)
Tips to get over him or what I should do.
Q. Help.. I am still in love with someone whoz moved on. We were in love but I didn't want 2 be with him because I didn't have my parent's spproval. He understood and was very nice. I thought I had moved on so I told him to, and everyone told hi...
A. 21 January 2009: You really can't blame him for moving on, but he needs to be honest with himself and his bew girlfriend. Why is he with her if he doesn't like her?
In any case, that's not your problem right now. Do your parents approve of you dating, or did they... (read in full...)
Football player drama.
Q. I'm going to a new high school and I became very popular with the guys (I don't get along too well with girls) we all talk about their girl friends and life and guy stuff. A lot of my friends just recently went paintballing and some of the foot ball ...
A. 21 January 2009: Do you like J like that? Get to know him. The "wanted to be all mine" is weird, but guys are weird.
Don't do anything you don't want to, and then it won't matter what reasons he likes you for. ... (read in full...)
Young and confused...
Q. I'm 14. Yes, I'm really young. I've known I liked boys (unsure about girls) since a while ago. Recently, I've been pretty... dormant. I haven't looked at boys (since this is what the topic's about) or thought about anything involving them. ...
A. 21 January 2009: I'm gathering you want him to be your boyfriend (since you say you want him to be there in a way that "ordinary" friends can't), but he's heterosexual.
If you can stand to be his friend knowing that it will never be more, continue to be his frie... (read in full...)
Is he still interested in me??
Q. I'm having trouble. I don't think my boyfriend is interested in me any more. We've known each other for about 5 years now and dating for about a month now. he doesnt act like he's interested in me any more even though he says he is. For some reason ...
A. 21 January 2009: Kind of sounds like you're the go to girl when he's in between girlfriends.
If you're cool with just being friends with benefits, great. If not, I would inform him that you will no longer be his booty call in between serious relationships.... (read in full...)
Will I be making a mistake if I dump him now?
Q. Guys, my boyfriend of almost 2 years hasn't really been treating me well, we have been in along distance relationship but calling and messaging has been my responsibility alone he calls only when he wants,alot of things and i mean alot of thngs have ...
A. 21 January 2009: If you don't want to be with your boyfriend, break up with him. Don't make that decision based on meeting someone new.
Learn to love and enjoy yourself before you get involved with anyone else.... (read in full...)
My heart is with my ex and always has been but I am wearing another man's ring...
Q. Well my situation is very very complicated. I met my true love when I was 16 and we had a child when I was 19. He was 22 at the time and was not ready to settle down so we split and went our seperate ways. I always wanted things to work out ...
A. 20 January 2009: I'm sorry, but I think what you are doing is wrong. There is no good excuse for an affair. You should stop immediately and work things out with your husband or else get a divorce.... (read in full...)
Is he an abuser? Am I? (verbal abuse that is). Help!
Q. Help! Did I make a mistake in ending our relationship? If I did, how should I rectify the situation? I read the link on warning signs of dating a loser (http://www.dearcupid.org/question/warning-signs-youre-dating-a-loser.html), and thought that...
A. 20 January 2009: Yes, he's an abuser. Stay away from him.... (read in full...)
My dad and the widow.
Q. Dear cupid.org I am a 17 year old south asian, my dad is 61 and my mom is 47 years... of late my mom befriended a widow, she may about the same age as my mom.... she is quite attractive for her age.. my mom helped her get a job. Over a period o...
A. 20 January 2009: Women usually know. Unless you KNOW something, I wouldn't say anything. Your father may be having an innocent friendship with Mrs. P, and he may not. It's not your place to say anything unless you ABSOLUTELY KNOW.
These people are all adul... (read in full...)
I have a feeling that he really is a control freak deep down inside, but just hasn't let his true self out.
Q. Should I break-up with him? I have been with my boyfriend for four (4) years now. We have lived toghether for 2 1/2 years. And he has stated he would like to marry me one day, but we have never made an official engagement or anything. There...
A. 20 January 2009: You have to do what will make you happy in your life. It doesn't sound like he's a control freak. It just sounds like he's afraid of the future...Maybe he's said some things that aren't always nice or supportive, but relationships are about ... (read in full...)
Why does he never compliment me?
Q. I was just wondering why my guy doesn't compliment me? Even to say I am beautiful (of which I am) or to comment my hair, dressing etc. We have been dating him for 2 weeks now....
A. 20 January 2009: It seems like you already know everything you need to hear.... (read in full...)
Was I an asshole?
Q. One night came home after work and was horny as hell. I ended making love to my girlfriend. She's extremely self-conscious about her breasts because of a birthmark and won't take off her bra for me no matter how I beg. Anyway I couldn't take it ...
A. 20 January 2009: Yeah, you're over. And sorry to say, you got what you deserved.... (read in full...)
New relationship..already problems
Q. Um....hi im having serious boyfreind troubles and i need some serious help! I know this guy and he was my best guy freind and i really liked him and than my freind got us to start dating and now i dont like him infact i cant stand him hes so ugly, ...
A. 19 January 2009: Let that be a lesson to you--- don't EVER let your friends talk you into doing something.
... (read in full...)
Why would she start an affair with me if she was happily married?
Q. Hello, I'm an 18 year old female that had just ended a two year emotional affair with my ex-teacher. This is how it began.... It was my junior year; I was 16 and she was 26 and hadn't been married for a month. At first she started coming o...
A. 19 January 2009: I think the e-mail she directed at you was to cover her ass from a lawsuit. If there's no paper trail, it's her word against yours.
I think if you had confronted her in person you may have gotten a different answer.... (read in full...)
I have issues and I want to be a better person!
Q. Hi, this is kinda long-winded and it is more of a vent than anything but I have alot of problems these days and it's getting to me. Basically, I dropped out of uni about 2 years ago without telling anyone, I keep up a lie that I go to uni all th...
A. 19 January 2009: Well, I think you've taken a very important first step, which is to admit to yourself how far away from the person you want to be.
Now, figure out what you want. Forget your friends, forget your family (just for a minute)..do YOU want to go to univ... (read in full...)
I want her back but she won't hardly look at me
Q. Me and my gf had been going out foe 5 months before we broke up one week ago. We were each other's first make out partner all the way to oral sex in this time. All of the people in school said we were a beautiful couple and we were perfect for each ...
A. 19 January 2009: Maybe your relationship just ran its natural course. What were you arguing about prior to breaking up?
Also, I don't think it's a good idea for you to try to be her friend right now because you're too infatuated with her. If she honestly does... (read in full...)
Three girls love me! I want them all!
Q. I have three girls i have been talking to!! they all have told me they are in love with me!!! I wabt them all but dont want to break their hearts =[=[=[=[, how do i choose??...
A. 19 January 2009: Pick none of them. If none of them really stand out to you as being more compatible than the others, than none of them are the right one. Or, let them all know you're not ready for a serious relationship, and that you do not wish to be exclusive ... (read in full...)
Was I an asshole?
Q. One night came home after work and was horny as hell. I ended making love to my girlfriend. She's extremely self-conscious about her breasts because of a birthmark and won't take off her bra for me no matter how I beg. Anyway I couldn't take it ...
A. 19 January 2009: YES... (read in full...)
Need advice about how to get info from my baby's dad
Q. I'm due on Valentines Day and no support from my kids dad. He haven't called nor text to see how I am feeling. More so how our son is doing. When we were working things out, I've mentioned about the doctors appointments, no response. I've talked to ...
A. 19 January 2009: Seriously, don't let this guy worry you. If he already gave up his rights to one of your children, why would he think he would be awarded custody of the other?
If he takes you to court, you will only win.
As far as getting information about hi... (read in full...)
He tells me he loves his girlfriend but there is still sexual tension between us.
Q. dear cupid, Me and my partner split up a few weeks before christmas and it really hurt me. We were still sleeping with each other right up and till he got a new girlfriend which I found out was his house mate which hurt even more but on Christma...
A. 19 January 2009: He doesn't love his girlfriend. He's getting as much action as possible while trying to still seem to be a "good guy."
Stop sleeping with him before you catch something, and tell this loser to leave you alone. Don't answer his calls or texts. Ign... (read in full...)
She doesn’t want to begin a physical relationship until she’s has had a tummy tuck completed.
Q. While working as an online volunteer, I gradually formed a long distance romantic relationship with a co-volunteer. I’d known the woman professionally for a couple of years and developed great respect and admiration for her. However, we live 2000 ...
A. 19 January 2009: Just because you all meet, doesn't mean you have to have a physical relationship. I am interpreting "physical" to mean sexual.
If she doesn't want to MEET until her tummy tuck and it's been over 2 years that your online relationship has been goin... (read in full...)
Any advice would be appreciated about my tangled mess of a marriage!
Q. My husband left me (and our 2 kids) a few months ago, before Thanksgiving. This was quite a surprise to me, he just up and did it! We have been having problems before that for about 1-1/2 years. A couple of weeks after he left, I lost my job because ...
A. 19 January 2009: Okay, starting now, if he wants to pursue a divorce, you need to act as though you are already divorced which means that you need to set up rules.
1- No unexpected drop ins. If he wants to see the children, he will call you on the phone and you ... (read in full...)
I rarely get head but she REALLY doesn't want it herself either...
Q. I have a question regarding variety of sex dropping off in general, and cunnilingus in particular. My wife and I have been married nine years, been together for fifteen. No kids. When we were first got together we were quite open to most "stan...
A. 19 January 2009: I don't think it's unfair for you to desire it, but you can't make her do it. I don't like giving head because of the pre-ejaculate that comes out. So, I use this stuff called "head job" that tastes like cinnamon, and it's delightful, really. ... (read in full...)
I'm confused. If real women are better then why is the "ideal" totally unrealistic?
Q. Hi. I'm an insecure 20 year old. I'm very confused. For one, guys always say beauty comes from within, looks don't care, real women are sexier and more attractive than fake ones, etc. I'm just talking about looks, not personality. ...
A. 19 January 2009: Hmmm... Okay, I think that the women in mens mags are pretty hot, and I agree with your boyfriend that most men do. Most men though know that those women are out of their league, and they will never date/kiss/have sex with any of them.
I thin... (read in full...)
Masturbating and Oral Desires
Q. Has anyone while masturbating themselves, ever desired to experiment with someone of the same sex? Does this mean I'm gay? I've never acted on this feeling, but god it turns me on just thing about it....
A. 19 January 2009: You're normal. Sometimes I think about other females when I'm having sex with men. Both sexes have beautiful things about them that are desirable. Like the other poster said, maybe you're bi. There are a lot of sexy things in the world, so try ... (read in full...)
Too embarrassed to face him again....
Q. Me and my friend went to a restaurant with our mums and we both fancied the waiter and the other day we saw him in town and started to follow him around for ages and now we don't want to go in the restaurant again because it's too embarrassing but ...
A. 19 January 2009: Either tell them the truth, or just go with your parents. Maybe he didn't notice. If he did though, what can he do? He's probably flattered by the attention. To be safe though, don't follow him around anymore. ... (read in full...)
Is he still interested in me??
Q. I'm having trouble. I don't think my boyfriend is interested in me any more. We've known each other for about 5 years now and dating for about a month now. he doesnt act like he's interested in me any more even though he says he is. For some reason ...
A. 19 January 2009: What does he do that makes you think he's not interested?? I think we need more info because I would say that knowing someone for so long and then beginning to date them would definitely indicate they're interested. Maybe he just doesn't know how ... (read in full...)
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