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... Send *inktopaz a private message | | | *inktopaz's profile:I'm 29 and born and raised in California.
I've gone through quite a few relationships! Some were great and some were down right terrible!
I really enjoy trying to help people get through relationship woes. Sometimes they can be life consuming and everyone can use a little help from time-to-time.
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Does going down on a woman frequently make her more likely to cheat?
Q. I want to ask a question please which I'd like the most honest answers to. There's a couple, male and female, and in this relationship the man is willing to go down on a woman all the time without question while making love and without being as...
A. 15 September 2012: Umm no...if a man won't do any of the above and has to be asked like it's a chore for him, I would say it would be more of a cause than him actually doing so.... (read in full...)
Debate: Can a guy and girl really be just friends? All responses welcome guys and girls!
Q. Simple question. Its something I've pondered for a while now. Can a guy and girl really be just friends? So many times you hear about friends getting together after a long time. I have a particular guy friend, who in my mind I'm just friends ...
A. 12 September 2012: As some of the answers provided by person12345's link...as long as they are not attracted to each other, then yes. If even just 1 person is attracted, then yes, for a limited time; until one person wants to take the relationship further and the ... (read in full...)
Why do people hold such views?
Q. I am lesbian. Been with my girlfriend for nearly 6 months now. Most of my friends are fine with it, however a handful of my friends don't seem to understand and realise my sexuality. They say that lesbian sex isn't 'real' sex as there is no male to ...
A. 12 September 2012: Why do you feel the need to discuss your sex life with others?
I personally could care less if someone is gay, but if you're going to discuss your sex life then I'm going to be annoyed with it because frankly, I care as much about your sex life... (read in full...)
I just found out that the boy I like is asexual. Is it still possible for him to return my feelings?
Q. Ok, so hi everyone. I just found out that the boy I like is asexual today. Is it still possible for him to return my feelings? Honestly, his asexuality doesn't really matter to me at all. It will be a new thing if anything, since he lacks interest ...
A. 12 September 2012: You found out that the boy you like is asexual how?... (read in full...)
Is my wife losing interest in me what is going on?
Q. I'm married almost a year to my wife , I am 44 and she is 21 . For the past 3 to 4 weeks I am noticing a dramatic change in her and I'm wondering is there something wrong or is she losing interest in me or what.? For the past few weeks she has been ...
A. 9 September 2012: I agree with the other posters! Those symptoms you are describing what sound exactly like pregnancy. Sleeping a lot, frequent urination, dizzy spells...all point to a bun in the oven.... (read in full...)
My ex has a new girlfriend barely a month after we broke up, and he's going all out to profess his love for her!
Q. My ex broke up with me like 4 weeks ago. It was such a hurtful break up that I kept questioning myself what went wrong in our 5 year relationship. The love, the mental, physical, and emotional aspects were there too but maybe they were to me and not ...
A. 9 September 2012: Who cares? You're not with him anymore. Tell your friends to quit updating you as to what he's doing for her because it's clearly making you upset. He's moved on and you should too.... (read in full...)
My parents allow my younger sister more freedom than I ever had. Makes things very difficult. What changes should I instigate to help me cope with this?
Q. This doesn't really have anything to do with relationships, but I need some advice. I hate hate hate being the oldest sibling. I have one younger sister, 15 years old, and I love her to bits but she is driving me insane right now. Ever since she...
A. 9 September 2012: Honestly, I think this is pretty normal. I'm the youngest of three girls and my middle sister would get so upset because as she said that my parents let me "get away with murder." Which was true, my parents let me get away with and do things that ... (read in full...)
What can I do about the unwanted gift my mother in law gave me? It disturbed my husband and I. What was I supposed to do?
Q. I'm in a situation that I'm not sure whether was a nice gesture or something very strange/kind of disturbing. I'm not sure how to prevent future uncomfortable incidents without hurting my mother-in-law's feelings. Some background info might be ne...
A. 8 September 2012: There's nothing to do, throw them away and if she's asks tell her you love them.... (read in full...)
I can't get over this male model but he doesn't like me in that way. Should I lose my virginity to him?
Q. Hi, I am a lost person at the moment. I had a thing with a male model we romanced three times with one almost leading to sex but I refused because I knew he did not like me. I still like this guy, even when I forgot him I dream about him and that ...
A. 7 September 2012: You've known him for 2-weeks, you don't think he likes you, and you're only 21 at the oldest and you think it's a big deal that you've only liked 2 people in your life. Do you really have to ask?... (read in full...)
I am worried about him financially. Am I wrong??
Q. Hi aunts and uncles :) I will try to make this short. My bf moved in with my two children and I about three months ago. He has helped us out with rent,cable, electric AND food. Hasn't missed a week of payments. A few weeks ago he called me a...
A. 5 September 2012: Well just because you'd handle it one way doesn't mean he's wrong for not handling it the same way. He probably figures there's not much he can do except pay back what he needs to pay back...life will go on. I'm kind of that way, so I kind of get ... (read in full...)
I've been very depressed since moving to the US from Mexico
Q. Lately I have been very depressed. I move to the US for college six months ago, I've been in a LDR since then. I haven't really made much friends since i moved here, people are just very different and not that open compared to the people in my co...
A. 5 September 2012: It's quite normal, you're homesick! Even being in a different town, let alone a different country makes anyone miss home, especially if they haven't been away from home very often in the past.
I'm not sure where you're going to school. I live i... (read in full...)
Am I driving him to drink?
Q. I have been with my husband for 3yrs now. We got married in feb 2012... He has a drinking problem. He stopped for 6 months that is why I agreed to marry him. I have 3 kids he has 2 we bought a house a yr and half ago. Here is the problem and I don't ...
A. 5 September 2012: After reading this story, I'm surprised you're not the one that has been driven to alcohol abuse!
No, dear. You are absolutely not driving him to drink. He's choosing to cope with his idiotic behavior by drinking. Unless you're there pouring ... (read in full...)
If someone is ready to be pleasured how can they not be ready to give pleasure?
Q. Is something wrong with me? My boyfriend and I (I am a gay man) have been together almost 3 years, we are getting married in November. We live together and have a very open and public relationship. The problem I am having is in the bedroom. Our...
A. 5 September 2012: Here's my advice:
Whatever you do, don't marry him! Unless he makes more money than you do...I kid. Unless you want to spend your life in misery, don't marry him. ... (read in full...)
This internet conflict went too far, and I don't know what to do.
Q. I'm 15, and i frequently use the website tumblr. i am a sophomore. i made a post with advice for freshman, and at the end i said (jokingly) "if you scream when you see your friends, i'll hit you". this girl messaged me anonymously saying things like ...
A. 5 September 2012: She's probably not going to do anything. Ignore people like that and don't talk about hitting people/beating people up in any context. Everyone takes everything too literally these days and ruin people's lives over nothing.... (read in full...)
What should I do my bf is driving me nuts!!
Q. Hi ! I have a bf of almost 5 years. He is a hard worker he is funny and has a great family . We use to live together but we couldn't afford it so we both moved back to our patents. My dad and him don't get along so he isn't aloud at my house. He ...
A. 5 September 2012: Hmmmm he's always accusing you of cheating and then does nothing special for you, then turns it around on you when you want to discuss it and then ignores you. Are you sure he's not cheating on you? I know you didn't ask that, but I had a ... (read in full...)
Sisters have cut me out, why do people do this to each other?
Q. I need some help and advice as my heart is breaking. I have a sister who has some sort of mental issue. She's a compulsive liar, a master manipulator, a character assassin and will twist your words around until you don't recognize them. From her ...
A. 4 September 2012: Before reading your second to last paragraph, I was going to ask if your "sane" sister was really sane? I have 2 sisters as well, and sorry, I don't have any of them that do anything like that. They do irritate me from time-to-time but nothing ... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and I'm pregnant by my 15 year old B/f who talked me into sex. What do I do now?
Q. Hey!:) Ok, I have a huge problem and really need some help! I'm 14 years old, and have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 months. He is 15, and in the year above me at school. At the beginning of the relationship, everything was absoutol...
A. 4 September 2012: So your boyfriend made you start smoking and he made you have sex and now he made you have a baby...hmmm sounds like you're in quite a pickle.
I'm sure your best friend wants to help but there's only so much you can do and the more time you wast... (read in full...)
How much of a deal breaker is penis size?
Q. I've seen a lot of penis anxiety threads based around "reassure me, is insert size normal?" but I'm going to come at it from another (still similar) angle. I'm 23, relatively slim although my guts bigger than it's ever been (people still ac...
A. 4 September 2012: I think it really just depends on the woman. I prefer a guy on the bigger side (not too big) as opposed to a guy on the smaller side. But I've know girls that like guys that are smaller. I'm assuming it's similar to how some men prefer women with ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend used my phone to send himself a picture of my sister's fake boobs
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8yrs and last year when I was getting ready really early for work I noticed my boyfriends phone receiving a message and I glanced at his phone and noticed the message was from me. I was confused because I had not ...
A. 3 September 2012: Yep, I agree. Your boyfriend's "explanation" is complete BS and not only an invasion of privacy but weird and perverted! You should be insulted that he thinks you're so stupid to believe his dumb story. If it were that simple, he would just ask ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to see me as often as I want to see him!
Q. I'm 23, my boyfriend is 26. We've been together a little over 2 months. I would like to see him everyday or at least every other day, but he only wants to hang out maybe 2-3 days a week. We've talked about this, and he has said "You're not my life. ...
A. 2 September 2012: I think some people are just more codependent than others. In order for you to feel connected to him, you need to see him daily--for him, he's good with seeing you a few times a week.
With my last boyfriend,I loved the fact that I only could se... (read in full...)
18 year old living with us is too friendly. Do I tell her brother?
Q. Hey everyone, I'm in a living with my boyfriend for the past 4 years now,and everything was going great,he has a good job so do I..but now the problem has arised cuz of a third person which unfortunately I brought into the picture.. My best guy fr...
A. 2 September 2012: Yes, talk to her brother about why you're going to kick her out.... (read in full...)
Dumped on my birthday and I have no idea why!
Q. Am feeling pretty fragile at the moment and in a state of shock and am hoping someone will offer me some advice. Have been in a relationship for the last 6 years and without warning and without any clues I have been dumped a few days ago. My partner ...
A. 1 September 2012: It's only been 3-months! I don't think I've EVER been over someone in 3-months that I really loved and had a LTR with. It's normal and it sucks, in another 3-months you'll probably be a little better.
BUT I do want to applaud you for losing w... (read in full...)
If I choose love over my dreams, wil regret it?
Q. Used to date this guy for 2 years, 7 years ago. We broke up because i moved to another country to study in the university but everytime i go back to my home town we hook up. I still love him a lot and he says that he still loves me too. My dream was ...
A. 30 August 2012: You're already at a distance and if he's "the one" then he'll be there when you get back. He'll wait if he feels you are too or either he can come with you so you can fulfill your dream.
Whatever you do, don't ever put your dreams on hold for... (read in full...)
I cheated on all of these men, why are they still calling me?
Q. I have had serveral men in my life once a point a time that I use to deal financely,sexually,mentally the whole nine yards.now these guys have saw each other but they don't know each other like that and the first guy caught me with the second guy ...
A. 26 August 2012: Because they want to have sex with you.
... (read in full...)
Do women look at men's butts?
Q. Is it true that women look at mens butts like men look at theirs...!!??...
A. 26 August 2012: I do sometimes...actually, maybe I do all the time now that I think about it. I tend to notice if a guy has a nice tush, but it's not a deal breaker or anything.... (read in full...)
I'm having sex with one of my brother's best friends
Q. Recently, I started a sexual relationship with this woman...We've only had sex a handful of times, but I may have grown attached already...We talk all the time, even after we've had a night of passion haha... We have a slight problem though.....
A. 26 August 2012: As far as telling her you're interested in her, maybe you should go a round about way of asking her.
Instead of telling her, "Hey, I like you. Do you like me?" Play it out a little differently...like ease into it. The first scenario is scary be... (read in full...)
Cheating b/f gave me genital herpes, is there anything natural I can take?
Q. Hi I really need some advice as I am in bits and don't know what to do I recently caught my boyfriend of nearly 2 years cheating on me so I went to a gum clinic to get myself tested for any stis and I found out I have genital herpes I feel so ...
A. 26 August 2012: I'm all for homeopathic treatments. But certain things just won't work the same as treatments that you need a prescription for. I agree with Honeypie, go see a doctor and get whatever you need for outbreaks.
I know it seems like life is over,... (read in full...)
We broke up but I want to remain close friends
Q. Hello everyone, To make it short and simple I want to start by saying my boyfriend and I have been going out for 5 years. We've had our ups and downs in the relationship but always knew how to steer it back on the right track when things were goin...
A. 25 August 2012: Okay, so it sounds like you need a reality check. You've been together 5-years and you're in your early 20's my guess is that he's probably your first "real" boyfriend?
1. He's being a jerk and purposely trying to push you away. Usually when peo... (read in full...)
He's so much taller than me, will this work?
Q. This guy i've met we get along really well as if we've known each other a lot longer than the past couple weeks, we like the same things so we have a fair amount in common. He's really sweet and fun to be around, and good thing is he's funny in such ...
A. 24 August 2012: Wow! Talk about worrying over nothing. It's not like you're a dwarf and he's 6'3", then yeah, that might be a little weird. My dad is 6'6" and my mom is 5'3", not a big deal at all. Some tall guys like petite women and some like taller women so ... (read in full...)
Why does he care so much if he is a player?
Q. Hi again. Yes, I have yet another question on the same guy. So yesturday me and him were texting and he asks if I had a boyfriend. And when I say yes he replies oh :(. But, he has had lots of girlfriends in the past year (over 12). He told me that ...
A. 24 August 2012: If he's a player (so he likes everyone) and if you're seeing someone, then who cares? I'm guessing you like him then? I haven't read your previous questions either and based on this, it sounds like he's a flirt for sure, and I'm sure he likes you ... (read in full...)
Should I wait for his return home after one wonderful night?
Q. Hello all. For starters I just got out of a 2 year relationship 3 months ago and not to be tooting my own horn but there are a lot of guys out there trying to talk to me. Im not exactly looking for a relationship but if one seems to happen then so ...
A. 24 August 2012: Umm NO! Kuwait for only a month? I highly doubt he's only going to be a gone a month--then again I don't know all the details with military and maybe you misunderstood, but I think usually they're gone a minimum of 6-months? He was leaving 2-days ... (read in full...)
I love my husband but his habits of selfishness and laziness are starting to makes me feel unimportant and undervalued, and is putting me into a state of depression.
Q. I love my husband, but his habits of selfishness and laziness are starting to really eat at me. While I feel he loves me, I don't feel he cares about me. He doesn't seem at all concerned with what I might need or want, and everything seems devoted ...
A. 23 August 2012: Umm...WOW. Depressed? That's an understatement.
Sorry dear, but your hubby is acting like a total piece of shit and he needs a reality check.
1. Stop making your man-child-husband dinner. If he doesn't like anything you cook then you ca... (read in full...)
I'm 24 years older than him but am so attracted to him! What do I do about it?
Q. OK this is a question that I hope all you male readers out there will chime in on, as I need a man's perspective. I am a 54 year old woman, routinely told I look at least 10 years younger. I keep my hair colored, exercise every day, try not to dress ...
A. 23 August 2012: I know you want a man's perspective...but just my own experience with older men. When they're near my father's age (I'm 28 and my dad is 53) I think of them as a father-type figure. So I may go out of my way to help them with things or I talk to ... (read in full...)
How do I get this trainer out of my head? I thought he liked me but apparently he doesnt
Q. What should I do? :( omg I've never felt so stupid in my life:(? So there's this personal trainer at my gym who has been dating at me and watching me through the doors throughout my work out. My friend introduced me to him and said ...
A. 19 August 2012: I'm sure he flirts with a lot of girls to get business. There's no reason why you should feel stupid, it's not like he knows anything. Also, getting him out of your head shouldn't be a problem...it's not like you two had any sort of relationship. ... (read in full...)
Ex's g/f is all psycho -- what's up?
Q. So I was walking down the street with this guy i'm seeing and I happen to run into my ex and he is with some friends and his girlfriend. He didn't see me because he was talking to someone then all of a sudden his girlfriend looks at me and then ...
A. 17 August 2012: Keep ignoring her, because really who cares why she acts stupid? If she gets attention from it, then she'll continue. If you ignore her and give her nothing; she'll stop eventually and move on with her life. ... (read in full...)
My two year old is not progressing vocally the way people tell me he should. Do I have cause to worry?
Q. My beautiful toddler has just turned 2. He's not talking though. He makes sounds but no real proper words except grandma and mama which he uses to describe everything. He is a good communicator and lets me know what he wants non-verbally, an...
A. 17 August 2012: It's probably best to have him evaulated. My nephew has autism and he used to get frustrated because he couldn't convey what he wanted into words. After being evaluated, someone worked with him and he talks just fine (he's just on the spectrum ... (read in full...)
Should I be upset about planning an abortion?
Q. I just found out I am 4 weeks pregnant. I'm going to have an abortion. I don't feel guilty about it at all, in fact im actually happy about it. Shouldnt I be crying?...
A. 15 August 2012: At 4-weeks, no. Back when I scheduled my appointment for an abortion (about 5-years ago) I had no doubt in my mind and didn't feel bad at all. The problem for me was that they make you wait 2-weeks I believe before you can have the procedure. In ... (read in full...)
How does the drug Ecstasy affect the body?
Q. Hi, just curious... what exactly is ecstasy? I don't plan on taking it, but I'm just curious because I'll see commercials for Trojans Ecstasy condoms, and I want to know exactly what it does, not the condoms, but the actual drug. I've seen questi...
A. 14 August 2012: I used to do Ecstacy fairly often and it's exactly how others have described. If you get a good roll (high) it's the happiest you've ever been, you're energectic, you love everyone and everything. I remember the first time I did it, I wished I ... (read in full...)
Ladies why date a man first if he asks you to marry him right away?
Q. This question is especially for young single women. If a young single man who has everything going for him financially and career wise decides to settle down and approaches you but doesn't want to date you but asks you to marry him. Would you ...
A. 13 August 2012: "This question is especially for young single women. If a young single man who has everything going for him financially and career wise decides to settle down and approaches you but doesn't want to date you but asks you to marry him. Would you say ... (read in full...)
Is it reasonable to limit the amount the roommate's b/f sleeps over?
Q. Hi all, I m 24 and I m renting a flat with my bf that can only accommodate 3 people in terms of the lease. About a month ago we decided to sublet a room to a 3rd person because I lost my job and needed help to cover my college tuition. We managed ...
A. 12 August 2012: No, not unreasonable at all! Either he needs to go home or he needs to start paying his portion of rent.... (read in full...)
Is it possible for him to die from blood clots in his lungs and 5 broken ribs?
Q. I know this is not a relationship question but I appreciate anyone who takes the time to help. This is about my husband's friend; we'll call him "Panda" to keep his name anonymous. Panda is 35 years old, has a wife and 3 children. Se...
A. 12 August 2012: Blood clots in his lungs: Yes, that's pretty serious. He needs to not move around much at all. I had a friend in high school die from a blood clot in her lung that no one knew about after a car accident.
Broken Ribs: People get broken ribs all... (read in full...)
Dumped on my birthday and I have no idea why!
Q. Am feeling pretty fragile at the moment and in a state of shock and am hoping someone will offer me some advice. Have been in a relationship for the last 6 years and without warning and without any clues I have been dumped a few days ago. My partner ...
A. 20 May 2012: Dumping you on your birthday does seem rather mean. Are you sure there was nothing wrong in the relationship and you kept avoiding it? It seems like when someone does that it's almost out of retaliation.
Anyway, six years is a long time to ... (read in full...)
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