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... Send *etina1 a private message | | | *etina1's profile:Hi I'm a 50+ Woman of the world. Been through divorce, lived as a single parent and work for social services. Spent 6 yrs in adult education. I've had many jobs and many experiences of working with diverse and interesting people. I know life can be hard and realize that some people don't know where to look for the answers for things that are important to them as an individual. I hope I can advise honestly and responsibly to the questions asked. Good Luck, Hope this helps. Petina1 x |
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Confused soul who thought she knew it all...
Q. Hard to determine what my relationship status is with this man however it seems to work for both of us. He's an aquarius and I'm an aries (both independent souls) Started off as friends who met online from a social network and about a month later ...
A. 24 December 2010: After 3 kids you maybe should have tackled this problem by now. You need to see you GP who will advise you on multiple choices of contraception. If your partner knows you arent taking birth control it shouldnt come as too big a suprise if you get ... (read in full...)
I just got married but am thinking about her sister!
Q. I just got married to my girlfriend who I have been dating for 10 years. But, I think I am attracted to her sister now. My wife is great, but from time to time I think about being with her siter. I don't know whats wrong with me. Help!...
A. 21 December 2010: You could be bored now and thinking you are missing out on something. You need to think very carefully what you want out of married life and also what you will lose if you go after y our wifes sister. These things can be very messy in families.... (read in full...)
Why is my cousin so possessive of me?
Q. Does this behaviour imply that he thinks Im his possession? I told my cousin that I was buying a dress and he said 'not too short', I asked why not and he said 'you are not so young' (I am 41). Yet he also has said before that I have such beauti...
A. 21 December 2010: It depends on how short your dress is really. Why don't you ask some of your trusted friends on their honest opinion on what you look like and tell them to be truthful because it's very important. Then at least you can go from there. ... (read in full...)
I want to move on from cheating boyfriend but we have kids!
Q. I feel like my boyfriend is cheating on me and i can not take it any more because he always on his phone not working at this time having nasty pics of other girls on his contact list and he really don't wanna have sex with me anymore saying " if i ...
A. 21 December 2010: I've always thought its hard enough bringing kids up, but if y ou are miserable bringing them up then it's hard on them. You need to get your life on track, get rid of the dead wood, that will make you happier and you will find a lot of happiness ... (read in full...)
Husband cheated on me 2 years ago but I am having dreams about it!
Q. My husband cheated on me two years ago.. but since then we have been working through it and trying to move foward.. but in the recent week or so i keep have recurring dreams that hes still cheating on me. in my dream i run into the girl he cheated ...
A. 21 December 2010: I'm a great believer in dreams and do believe they have meaning. Your subconcious is picking up on some different behaviour from your husband and maybe that's how you are thinking about it in your dreams. I always say to married people, go on your ... (read in full...)
Why didn't he just tell me he got back with his ex?
Q. There was a guy I was dating a few years ago but things didn't get serious as the timing was off. I got back together with an x.boyfriend. We stayed friends and in contact via facebook. I ran into him on the weekend (Saturday) at a friends. We ...
A. 21 December 2010: He sounds like he was on a rebound from the x girlfriend and now he has got back with her seeing as he is now avoiding you. I would just leave it now and see if he does get back to you. Its very early on and you've already got over him. Are you ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend cheated on me and then doesn't understand that I want space?!
Q. my boyfriend is thai and went away to thailand with his sister for 5 weeks. this is his last week of staying there. only yesterday he told me he slept with another girl within the first week of going there. he said he was so drunk and says he doesnt ...
A. 21 December 2010: Is there an ulterior motive to wanting to see you now. You can't solve all his problems. How can you leave him alone with drink etc if he even admits to sleeping around and not knowing what he's doing when drunk/high. How can you have a normal ... (read in full...)
I want that inch back! Does weight affect penis size?
Q. I know this is kinda of weird question. Well like a year ago i had 9 inch penis but i was 6.5 tall and had only 160 pounds. So i started to work out and gain weight well i am 210 punds now and my body is in a pretty good shape ,but my penis seem to ...
A. 21 December 2010: You may have to go and find a burger bar and start piling the pounds on. If one of your g/friends are complaining at 8'', i think it's time she left as well. ... (read in full...)
I'm not ok with him hanging around with women he's slept with!
Q. Ok I'm not comfortable with a situation I'm in and im not sure how to address it.. To keep it simple..prior to my relationship, my bf racked up a large 'score' so to speak.. and he's from a small town so everytime he goes 'home' he's around or p...
A. 21 December 2010: It sounds like every womans nightmare to me. He needs to get out of that situation if he is serious with you. He has it in him to cheat. I wonder if he confessed to that or did you find out by chance. If you did find out, then it shows he could ... (read in full...)
Unemployed and yet my wife is asking for petty cash!
Q. I am currently unemployed, while paying for a large 5 bedroom home and all related expenses for my spouse and 2 children to live comfortably. My spouse continues to ask me for petty cash that she expresses is needed because of her over spending or ...
A. 21 December 2010: If you are unemployed I think your spouse is lucky that you are paying all the expenses. You will just have to be strong and say, yes you can have a bit extra if i get more income coming in, otherwise you can't manage it at the moment. Some ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has been acting differently since his brother died
Q. I'm 17 and I got my first boyfriend a year and a half ago. We're still together, but recently he's been acting differently around me. I feel like now he doesn't care about me at all. He started acting differently when his brother died a couple of ...
A. 21 December 2010: Has he been able to speak openly about his brother to you and express his thoughts etc. He still is grieving and will be for a very long time. It's hard for someone to understand the effects of grief because no one knows how it will affect them ... (read in full...)
He ignores me and then says its my imagination
Q. Dear Cupid My bf is avoiding me constantly, if he is nice to me for 2 days he would avoid me like plague for another 4 days, then again he would talk to me as if nothing happened. Whenever i ask him what's going on, he'll just say i am imaginging ...
A. 21 December 2010: It sounds to me that he is obviously busy doing other things when he is ignoring your texts etc. Why don't you put it to the test, when he doesnt answer, call him using your friends telephone, if he is curious and picks it up then, well, at least ... (read in full...)
We're both attached so why does she act this way?
Q. So Here goes. I have been working with a very nice pretty lady for 3 years now. I am married. She got engaged a month ago. When I first started working with her she was single and I had a strong sense that she was attracted to me. She would touch my ...
A. 21 December 2010: She may feel like you feel betrayed because she is now a married woman and that could change things in her eyes. No one knows what anyone is thinking unless they dare to ask, but she could have built you up as a fantasy before she married and ... (read in full...)
The Flirter!!!
Q. I'm pretty young, still in middle school. And there's this boy I "like". I think he feels the same way because he is ALWAYS flirting with me. He puts his arm around me and pulls my hair... he even called me sexy haha. But he is known as a flirter. ...
A. 21 December 2010: I'd say he likes you. He is flirting with you because he's probably wanting to test your reaction to make sure you don't recoil away from him. Flirting is like what male animals do in the animal Kingdom to attract a mate. Flirt back, if you like, ... (read in full...)
Is she just teasing me?
Q. So we're on msn, me and a girl i like. We are not going out but things have started to happen since the christmas party. She's feisty and we know each other well. Next term at uni we want to spend time together alone and see how things go in private ...
A. 21 December 2010: I'm sure she likes you because she is finding time to talk to you on msn and have fun with you. I'd say it's a start.... (read in full...)
Will he think I am desperate? Should I wait for him to ask me instead?
Q. Hi aunts! So, I like this guy and I think he likes me. We do get along well (we work together) and I'd love to ask him out. I'm gonna see him tomorrow at work and I'd like to just casually say something like: "Would you maybe like to come over to ...
A. 21 December 2010: Wait until a Friday and ask him if he'd like to go for a drink from work to unwind. I think asking him for a meal at your place maybe a bit too forward and if he's not ready for that could scare him off. Small steps so you can feel your way about ... (read in full...)
Confused soul who thought she knew it all...
Q. Hard to determine what my relationship status is with this man however it seems to work for both of us. He's an aquarius and I'm an aries (both independent souls) Started off as friends who met online from a social network and about a month later ...
A. 21 December 2010: Medical condition stops you from using any kind of birth control, that in itself is very risky. If you arent pregnant I'm sure it will be down to pure luck. If you arent then you must also consider that STD's are on the increase and those diseases ... (read in full...)
Why if girls/women are around each other do they get their periods at the same time?
Q. After going through a lot of girls only parties (because I live with my mom and sister .) I've noticed one thing...Why do all girls get there periods at the same time! Its so weird and dont get me started with their mood swings mood swings. Why is ...
A. 19 December 2010: Could be a nature thing as well because in the animal kingdom they have mating seasons. Maybe that's what they get ready for in the pride, all having their newborns together. Just a thought.... (read in full...)
If I get near his phone, he flips. Am I wrong to think he could be cheating?
Q. Ok here is my problem. Me and my husband have two kids and have been together for six years. I recently discovered he's been watching porn behind my back after promising he wouldn't but I let that go without even getting mad at him. Well, I was ...
A. 19 December 2010: It's sad I know that you now have to re think your life. My husband and I leave our mobiles anywhere in the house. If he wants to look at it he can and I can look at his. Because theres no suspicious behaviour from him, i never look at his phone. ... (read in full...)
She says I don't understand her?
Q. Well, I've been seeing this girl for over a year and a half now. We've broken up and got back together countless numbers of times. We're sooooo in love and the whole world can see it. Even can't deny it, even when we hate each other's guts. The pr...
A. 18 December 2010: Honeymoon period over, your relationship is on a new level. It takes years and years and years to understand our partners, we all have our own needs and our own personalities, life styles etc. So complicated. Your relationship needs to be worked ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend gets upset when I go overseas says I always leave him when he needs me
Q. my bf is always upset each time i have to go overseas, saying that i am always away when he needs me. we have been together for over a year now and he always gets upset even if im going off for 2-3 days. my mom is always (once a month) wanting me to ...
A. 18 December 2010: You've been with him for a year, he knew that's what your life entailed. What's changed now, why is it a problem to him now. He musnt start preaching to you telling you what you must and mustnt do. 2 - 3 days isnt too much to ask is it. It's ... (read in full...)
My Privacy Rights vs. My Spouse's Right to Express Themselves
Q. My spouse has a blog where they routinely express themselves on it. I, by contrast, am very selective as to who knows what about my life and whatever I am / we are going through. I have told my spouse about my need for privacy, and while she ...
A. 18 December 2010: Married or not, everyone has the right to privacy. There's actually a law on it. You must be more outspoken with your wife and tell her not to publish anything without your consent. ... (read in full...)
Is it really wrong to be in love with my best friend's ex?
Q. I am 27 year old female and I am in love with my best friends ex boyfriend. They had only been with each other for a year or less. My friend is very mean to him all the time and says if she stayed with him she would continue to cheat consistently on ...
A. 18 December 2010: You paint a mean picture of the situation he has with your best friend. He may like her being like that with him. I'm a bit worried that he is flirting with you now and your friend doesnt know about that. What is it he wants. I suppose you could ... (read in full...)
How do I get my baby's daddy back?
Q. Hi, I'm would like to know how to get my baby daddy (Jim) back? I want us to be a traditional family and one day get married. We have known each other since we were 13 and had a child together at 25. We have been there for each other for a lot of ...
A. 18 December 2010: He sounds like he is doing right by his son. He's in a good routine. He has a lady friend. Unless something major has changed in your circumstances he may be afraid to go back to what you had and which caused you to break up. If you could ... (read in full...)
It needs to end
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for over a year now and in the begining it was great... it just didn't stay that way for long. We are now off and on as it seems and him and I are both tired of it. We love it when we're together..or at least I ...
A. 18 December 2010: The next time you meet, before you leave, arrange when you will see him again. During that space, keep yourself busy. Then when he rings you , you can either be in or out. You both are in that void between courtship like it can be becoming stale ... (read in full...)
Are all girls neurotic and evil?
Q. I don't know what to do; I've been with this girl for 19 months now. When we were first dating, everything was like a dream. It all went so smoothly. She was nice to me and we never fought. NOW, it seems that all we do is fight. She feels se...
A. 18 December 2010: I'm thinking that she is of the impression that she may be too good for you and you should worship the ground she is walking on. A lot of girls of her age want to be supermodels, not eating etc. She may get really ill and not be able to fight it ... (read in full...)
First kiss under the mistletoe: Good idea?
Q. I was wondering if a good way to have your first kiss would be under mistletoe? I'm going to this Christmas party on Tuesday and my crush (who is also my best friend) is going. It's a mutual friend's party and she said that there will definite...
A. 18 December 2010: Yes, hold the mistletoe over her head and smile. See what she does? Happy Christmas x... (read in full...)
Why am I having dirty thoughts about my friend?
Q. Let me start this off by saying I'm not proud of this. I have this cute friend she is very nice and smart. And very pretty But I did something I never have done before I masturbated to her picture. It was a pic her and some clevage was show...
A. 18 December 2010: Sounds like you are in lust with her. You are treating her just like some men look at glamour models in the papers or top shelf. Will she be safe with you when you meet up with her? I wouldnt let her know what you are doing until much later if ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend caught wanking at work?
Q. hi my name is sally :( my boyfriend (today ex) and i had an open very sexual relationshipd, we watched porn together often, until i found him doing it alone and found out he was doing it at work and even got caught wanking ? when i have conftonte...
A. 18 December 2010: Sounds like he attracted to everything at the moment. Don't they have locks on the toilets at work. There is a time and a place for everything. He may need sex therapy or he could get himself in to a lot of trouble for exposure or something. Ask ... (read in full...)
What's got into my wife? She says infidelity will enhance our relationship.
Q. My wife and I have been married for 17 years. She has never had sex with anyone other than me. She told me just two days ago that our sex life was great but that she wanted to experience sex with another man and also said she wanted me to be with ...
A. 18 December 2010: There are groups of people who are in to this type of thing, I'm sure you will be able to find them on the internet
If you are not bothered really about this it could ruin the relationship that you have with your wife and you may live to regret goin... (read in full...)
Why if girls/women are around each other do they get their periods at the same time?
Q. After going through a lot of girls only parties (because I live with my mom and sister .) I've noticed one thing...Why do all girls get there periods at the same time! Its so weird and dont get me started with their mood swings mood swings. Why is ...
A. 18 December 2010: it is weird isnt it. Why is it you want to know. After all it's just a girly thing.... (read in full...)
Would the Police treat this as real domestic abuse?
Q. my husband mentally abuses me. i want to call the police but i dont know if they would think him shouting at me and smashing things in the house serious enough....
A. 18 December 2010: I agree, get intouch with the Domestic helpline, you are being abused and it is not acceptable in any shape or form.... (read in full...)
Being confident and making better conversation?
Q. So I've got this issue, I'm quite confident yet very very shy at the same time and I'm have a lot of trouble sociailizing on a one on one basis and with people I feel are better than me, like more popular or older because I feel that they'll judge ...
A. 18 December 2010: confidence comes with maturity and experience. Have as many experiences in your life as you can and then you will find it easy to talk about things. I used to be very shy and found it difficult to sustain a conversation, felt exactly like you. I ... (read in full...)
How can I move on from abuse by Ex, to enjoy a loving relationship?
Q. I was in an abusive relationship for 7 yrs both physical and emotional and I've been trying to date new men objectively but I'm unable to be phsyically/sexually comfortable with them. I take medications and I have counseling but I don't have a love ...
A. 18 December 2010: It sounds like you are getting a lot of support you just need to carry on with that. You need to build your confidence and self esteem up as you would have had all that shattered in the abusive relationship. If you arent ready in you mind then you ... (read in full...)
If I get near his phone, he flips. Am I wrong to think he could be cheating?
Q. Ok here is my problem. Me and my husband have two kids and have been together for six years. I recently discovered he's been watching porn behind my back after promising he wouldn't but I let that go without even getting mad at him. Well, I was ...
A. 17 December 2010: He's definately up to no good. Otherwise his phone would be on the table or out in the open. Not locked up somewhere. You've known him long enough now to know when somethings not right. So what you do now is demand that he owns up to what he is ... (read in full...)
What should I do? I never wanted my love life to be this difficult!!
Q. Hey guys and gals hey guys i have a girl friend we love each other so much but my feelings for her have dimmed recently... you see last week i meet this girl at fencing we talked and surprisingly we had a lot in common we liked reading and enjo...
A. 17 December 2010: It's perfectly normal to have these mixed feelings at your age. No way should you be tied to one girl if you are thinking like this. Let your girlfriend down gently and see where you go with the other girl. If you can't do this and still want ... (read in full...)
I can't watch him destroy his life, what should I do?
Q. Should I stay with my boyfriend? Way to get right to the point right, it's just that my boyfriend and I live in two very different worlds. We started going out about two years ago, fall 2009 he went away to college, and when he came back last ...
A. 17 December 2010: You can't make anyone do what you want, they have to want it themselves. He has chosen to be like this and I can't see you changing him. He has got into a crowd at college who probably all live like this and now he is like them. he wants you to ... (read in full...)
How can I ask my procrastinating BF to not put things off until the last minute?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend likes to put everything done in the last minute, and it annoys me. We are having an appointment with our lawyer at the end of the year and for all the dates the lawyer is ok my bf chose 12/30, of course the lawyer rejected it and ...
A. 17 December 2010: Unfortunately he sounds like he's gonna be late for his own funeral. My partner of 30 yrs is the same, they don't usually change, it's all about being more organised than them. All you can do is try to bite your tongue or make all the dates ... (read in full...)
Have you ever tried pole dancing lessons? Should I go for it?
Q. I'd like to take some dance classes next year, but i haven't done any dancing at all recently, and i've never been trained. I went to some dance lessons as a child, but they were just fun classes, not really professional. I'd like to try ballroom ...
A. 17 December 2010: Doesn't matter what dancing you do, it's all fun. If you want to try lapdancing go for it. You could always buy a pole for your bedroom, to practise at home on, also you may be able to buy a cd to watch and learn. I used to do country dancing at ... (read in full...)
How picky are you when it comes to dating?
Q. i want a boyfriend really i do. but i'm just too picky :( i just want to know if theres anyone who is picky about anything in particular about the kind of person he or she would date....
A. 17 December 2010: After reading some of the letters on here it's good that you are picky. My mother used to always say 'anyone can have sex'. But let's face it a few years down the line what kind of a life do we have. You be as picky as you like, at least when you ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my childhood sweetheart!
Q. Hi, I have been in a relationship wth my wife for 15 years now and we were kinda childhood Sweathearts,, We got together when I we were young, She was 17 and I was 21.. We have had fun times and good times and she is Loyal and trustwrthy and p...
A. 16 December 2010: I think you've been together for so long you ve probably been thinking you are missing out on something, like not courted enough women in the early days etc. Like the grass might be greener. I think you have found that it's not the case and you do ... (read in full...)
Heavier than normal period!
Q. I'm on a really heavy period this month, I'm filling up my pads quicker than usual. The pain usually goes away, but this time the cramps are more painful, and they're there all day. Before I came on I had a different type of cramp. Is there some...
A. 16 December 2010: Periods can get heavier. Is it happening at the normal time of month for you or is it happening at other times as well. It's always best to let the doc know. if you are on a certain type of contraception that can affect things as well. You need ... (read in full...)
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