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... Send *eterPan a private message | | | *eterPan's profile:What qualifies me to answer your relationship question? ...I'm human too? Seriously, I'm probably no more qualified than anyone else, but at the same time, I've dated quite a bit... been married and divorced (so I guess I know what *doesn't* work).
Plus, this seemed interesting. At the very least, I know I'm not the only one out there suffering and trying to figure out a path through life... If my experiences can help you from falling into a sinkhole, then all the better, right? :) Also, I get a big kick out of helping my fell-man ..um, woman-kind too ;)
"The request lines are now open!..." (that's Cheech and Chong)
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I've fallen in love with my friend, but he just wants to have fun!
Q. My Best Guy Friend and I are extremly close.I've secretly fallen in love with him over the past year.well one of his relatives told me a week ago that my best friend said he liked me but didnt think i knew,and wouldnt wanna go out with me anyway ...
A. 12 June 2008: Depending on where you are in the States, you realize that he's technically committing statutory rape, right? I mean you ARE 16 right now and he's 18 and therefore considered an adult. So, if your parents disapproved of him, one quick call to the ... (read in full...)
My wife wants me to watch her with another man! What do you think?
Q. my wife wants me to watch her with another man. It really turns me on, but I don't want to ruin things. What do you think?...
A. 12 June 2008: Are you the least bit jealous? If so, then I would say "no way!" ...but, if all of you (and that means the third party too) are in agreement about this and have talked it all out, not to mention getting STD tested, then for me, the needle only ... (read in full...)
Falling for the wrong one!! What do I do?
Q. I love a guy and hes with a good friend I practically hooked them up but the more time I spent hooking them up the more I fell in love with him. What do I do?...
A. 11 June 2008: You introduce a friend to this guy and as you've been setting them up you realize that you want him for yourself, is that right? Well, it seems to me that if your friend isn't being as responsive to him, then snatch him for yourself... if you want ... (read in full...)
How do I put all this behind me and have a good life again? If she truly loves me how should she be handling this?
Q. Hey all I have been with my girlfriend for almost two years and just found out she was cheating on me for over a month. I always wanted to travel, and wanted a girl to go with. I had the time but my girlfriend can only get a week off a year. It...
A. 11 June 2008: Hey there... well, one thing's for sure: I can really feel you pain in this post. I am so sorry that something like this happened to you!
Well, Im sorry to tell you this, but a wound this deep is probably only going to heal with the passage ... (read in full...)
My online guy wants to marry me even though we've never met!
Q. So, I may seem insane to you guys after asking this question.... I've been talking to this guy online for about 3 1/2 years. We've become good friends and both have been wanting to date for quite some time..but he lives in TN. Last year he joined ...
A. 11 June 2008: You've been speaking and trading messages with this guy for 3 years? In that time you probably got to know each other pretty well... honestly? ...I'm envious! I actually don't think that you relationship is strange that it escalated to conversations ... (read in full...)
Might my son's father snatch him from me?
Q. i have a 14 month old son by a turkish man and he wants me to take him to see him im being warned he might snatch him any views on this ...
A. 10 June 2008: Are you worried that he might take your son and escape the country and return to Turkey? Well, I can't say that I've never heard of such a case (it has happened here in the United States as well). I'm curious if you intend to let him have an ... (read in full...)
How can I get the attention of a lovely guy I see at my church?
Q. I know this may appear to be strange, but isn't it amazing the effect one can have on you when you hardly know them? There's this guy, he comes to my church, he knows my mum very well they get along, he's a family friend really, i hardly speak to ...
A. 10 June 2008: I think you should go ahead and start a dialog with him, either through church (before or after services) or through your friends. It seems like the time is right. I think that if you can begin to associate with friends that associate with him, then ... (read in full...)
Spotted Dick. Has he got his just desserts for cheating?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a bit and we always had a great sex life until he started a new job as a labourer. Since then we've had sex about 10 times in the last 7months!! He says he doesn't want to have sex because he keeps...
A. 10 June 2008: Are you trying to describe an acne pimple? If that's the case, then it's not improbable to have them anywhere on your body... and I've even had them on my penis too. I am going to assume your boyfriend is about your age so this could easily be a ... (read in full...)
Is his behaviour inappropriate - or even illegal?
Q. My boyfriend and I have a daughter. My boyfriend is really comfortable with his body. He walks around naked in front of anyone in his family. His little brother is 11 years old and he has a little cousin who has just turned 7. He thinks because ...
A. 9 June 2008: I have never heard of a case from the legal implications that would prevent him from walking around naked in front of children of his own sex, in addition to doing it in his own home. I'm not sure if the same thing holds for an opposite sex child. ... (read in full...)
What do I say when he talks dirty?
Q. i dont kno what to say when he talks dirty, i guess my question is what do you say back when he says how do you want it or how bad do you want it and i say really f**king bad and he says prove it how do i prove it?...
A. 9 June 2008: Just because I'm a funny guy, your question made me think of this video... it's humorous, but there are little tidbits of suggestions in it...
http://www.videojug.com/film/how-to-talk-dirty-2
Then, I did a more serious search of Google and fo... (read in full...)
How do I initiate foreplay? Also how do I give a blowjob?
Q. i dont kno how to start the fore play,, actually i do how do i start the giving a blow job since i never gave one before how do i mak ethe first move with that?...
A. 9 June 2008: I would suggest that you search here for information on giving a blowjobs (I can guarantee that question has been asked many, many times).
Foreplay... well, it seems like it all starts with close hugging, then passionate kissing, moving on to ca... (read in full...)
Do people lie about hooking up with people to make their partners think more highly of them?
Q. do people lie about hooking up with people to make their partner think more highly of them?...
A. 9 June 2008: Well, I can't say it's not unheard of... so yes, it can happen. How often and the "type" of person to over-inflate themselves... well, I guess you know one already...
... (read in full...)
I still miss him, want to speak to him and get some answers and explanations! I feel such a fool but cannot let go!
Q. I dated a guy for 10months, we split up 4 months ago and i know i need to move on but need advice how to do this. I still think about him daily and sometimes still get that sickly pining feeling and all i want to do is contact him. It was a real ...
A. 9 June 2008: Did you ever see the movie "Moonstruck" with Cher? There were two lines in that movie that are immediately applicable here...
"Snap out of it!!" and "I'm so confused..."
OK, in all seriousness. I think that in the end, you have made a great cho... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't want to have sex anymore...help!
Q. My Wife doesn't get into our sex. She only prefers quickies and anything that goes beyond 10-15 minutes is already to much and I can see she looses interest. Oral sex is a problem, she only wants it for a few minutes and will rarely give me any. ...
A. 9 June 2008: I recommend that you both seek couples therapy. There may be other issues below the surface that need to be addressed.
If that's not comfortable for you, have you considered an "escape weekend" to rediscover yourselves? Trips where you have not... (read in full...)
I need tips for dealing with my partner's daughter, they've just been in contact after 3 years!
Q. Hi there, I need some tips. I have my partners daughter (20) coming over to visit for the first time. They have not spoken in three years but since her Mum got a new man she has decided her Dad may be a better option. I want to be positive but I ...
A. 9 June 2008: The best advise is to follow your partner's lead and behave and respond as her example shows. Regarding your common art interests, if you feel that you two are being civil and you feel you would like to try to open up to her more, this might be your ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if he stringing me along, what do you think?
Q. Right i like this guy, weve kissed, had sex, blah, blah... well i really like him, and hes told me he likes me, he asked me if im looking for a relationship and i said i dont know, and he said that he likes me but at the moment hes just looking for ...
A. 9 June 2008: I heard your call -- here's another opinion. Relationships are not solely about sex or a sexual encounter. I really don't understand the issue with money regarding if you two are in a serious relationship. I mean, if it's a matter of wanting to pay ... (read in full...)
I'm separated but still have feelings for my ex husband but I still love my boyfriend...who do I choose?!
Q. I am currently seperated but still have feelings for my ex husband and still love my boyfriend? How do I know who to choose?...
A. 9 June 2008: Are you separated or actually divorced? If you're divorced, I would say that "it depends" -- are these mutual feelings? Is there some kind of resolution for whatever reason you broke up for in the first place? I suppose the same set of questions ... (read in full...)
Is It The Teachers fault that Students are attracted to them or falling in love with them??
Q. Is It The Teachers fault that Students are attracted to them or falling in love with them?? As many people may have read or heard about students falling in love with their teachers then coming on websites like this to see what to do about it... ...
A. 9 June 2008: There is no way that you could hold a teacher responsible for somebody else's emotions. It's just not possible to control. ... (read in full...)
I just broke up with my boyfriend. He wants to be friends, but should I distance myself from him?
Q. I just split up with my boyfriend of 4 years. We had a very close relationship and although he thought everything was fine, I wasn't happy. This was yesterday. As he was my first proper boyfriend, I don't really know how I am supposed to handle...
A. 9 June 2008: I think that you need to keep some distance, for now. Trying to maintain a friendship with all the usual trappings could easily mislead him into believing that a reconciliation might be in the works. If you are sure that you want to remain ... (read in full...)
My problem is that she seems to believe that I am stupid!
Q. A little background first. I am a 22 year old male dating a 20 year old single mother. He have known each other since High School and dated one for a short period of time. My problem is that she seems to believe that I am stupid. When asking about ...
A. 9 June 2008: Pack your stuff and leave. You're getting brow-beaten and you don't deserve to be mistreated. Please seriously consider it -- let her find another housekeeper!... (read in full...)
How can I get my family to speak to me?
Q. I feel like some of my family members don't like to speak to me, and don't like me very much. I guess when I was younger I wasn't as nice to them. Now I changed, and i'm much nicer now. However, when I try to speak with them now, they don't feel ...
A. 9 June 2008: My first thought would be to reverse all the all of their preconceived notions on some behavior they would expect from you and do the opposite behavior. Now you know what it was they didn't like so it's up to you to figure out what those things are ... (read in full...)
Girls (and guys) have you ever been used?
Q. has anyone ever used you to get sex when you really liked them and you thought they liked you too but all they wanted was to get in your pants? and if so how did you get over it? ...
A. 8 June 2008: I'd dare say that most of the world's population has been there in some way, shape or form... yes, even guys. As far as getting over it... it's probably just as varied as the situations that started it in the first place. For me, it was the ... (read in full...)
Have I scared my BF away by telling him the truth?
Q. ok,so ive just been txin me boiifrend,and i keep asking him these question like "why do you say you love me,when u probably dont mean it" keep in mind we're only young, and i mean young, but he assures me he does mean it but then he says, why do u ...
A. 8 June 2008: Well, I hope that you get more messages from him again. I think that you might want to ease up the text messages... and perhaps realize that there are people who are affectionate and know what they want... although I suspect that you're both a bit ... (read in full...)
Any help?-I am losing hope of finding true love
Q. I am losing hope of finding true love. I moved to a new city for a job about one and a half years ago and my dating life died the day I moved. I have a female friend that tells me that I am attractive, fun, and a great catch, but if that is so ...
A. 7 June 2008: First piece of advice: NEVER marry anyone that doesn't make your heart skip beats or go into a complex jazz rhythm! Loneliness is NOT a reason to be married!
Next, you're not wasting your "good years" away. Sure, moving to this new town may have... (read in full...)
What should we do if we don't know what we're doing?
Q. hi, im 17 years old, and im just starting to go out with this guy, we've only been on 2 dates, and the other day he told me he was a bad kisser, and the sad thing is that im a bad kisser also. so what should we do if we dont know what we're doi...
A. 7 June 2008: It's kind of funny (in a sad kind of way): perception is the strongest part of expectation. In other words, stop telling yourself (him too) that you're bad kissers! You know what? Your two (so called) negatives when brought together might make a ... (read in full...)
Is she being too friendly?
Q. Is she being more than friendly? My sister-in-law always hugs me whenever she greets me. While this is common among our family and close friends she seems to press tighter, and hold for a little longer than the other women do. While one of m...
A. 7 June 2008: Well, if she's attracted to you, coming on to you or simply friendly because you're "family", to me it seems that as long as you are satisfied that's she's not reaching around for a tweak, then it just seems like she thinks you're special... in ... (read in full...)
Is he in it for the sex or does he also have feelings for me?
Q. hi im writing for some desperate advice..im 25 years old and me and my guy friend have been best friends for 5 years now... im deeply in love with him and i have indeed revealed this to him already but he claimed he didnt want to break up the ...
A. 6 June 2008: Well, this could be either case here... either it's a friends with benefits thing or you might be moving toward a standard relationship. To me, the first thing that comes to mind is who initiated the intimate contact -- you or him? I think that you ... (read in full...)
How do I ask if he is seeing other women?
Q. I am dating someone, the first guy I've been serious with since my ex. It is my experience now that a lot of people date a few people at the same time. Is it stupid to ask him if I'm the only one? He does not seem to be hiding anything, but I've...
A. 6 June 2008: I agree with Tremor's advice, but I would also urge you to avoid anything sneaky here as well. That means no sneak-peeks at his cell SMS messages, email or other tell-tale signs... I think a heart-felt conversation about it would be reasonable.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend will not get a divorce!
Q. Hi, I'm 43 and my boyfriend is making me crazy!!! We have a two year old daughter and we've been living together for 3 years. My problem is my boyfriend has yet to get a divorce from his wife and he pays her half of his paycheck every week(not...
A. 6 June 2008: I'm first curious as to where in the states you are. Divorce laws differ from state to state, so it's kind of important. Second, to me, it seems like he should have or be speaking with an attorney about this. It seems that she could refuse to sign ... (read in full...)
Should I ask my msn friend out?
Q. im 15 years old im incredibly shy and i really like this girl.i met her through myspace and ive metup with only once im not sure how she feels about me though.we talk alot on msn and text alot too.how can i tell if she likes me?and should i ask her...
A. 5 June 2008: Well, if she's spending a lot of her time communicating through electronic means, I'd say that at the least there's a friendship there. If you take it to the next level, I'd say (at least) spend more time face to face and communicate. Sometimes you ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my boyfriend how to give me an orgasm?
Q. hi, well i have lost my virginity back in april just gone and have only ever had sex twice with my boyfriend at that time, he never made me orgasm through sexual intercourse but i had slight orgasm when he rubbed my clit and gafve me oral sex.... i ...
A. 5 June 2008: Honestly? I think you should just straight out tell him. I'm not sure what else to say... other than this: we guys are pretty thick, but when we care about our women, we're all ears! If you tell him straight out (and don't criticize his current ... (read in full...)
How can I come to accept that he lied to me about his age?
Q. Hi, I'm 23 and my bf and I have been together for 5 months now. I've always thought he was 38 but some weeks ago I discovered he is actually 42. I had my suspicions so I took his ID while he was asleep. Then I wrote a note and left. When he ...
A. 5 June 2008: I agree with Susan here. I think the bigger question here is if you love him or not, despite his issue with age. Sometimes people lie about things like this (and weight ...and if you don't believe me, go to your favorite online dating site and see ... (read in full...)
My ex has a narcissistic personality disorder and no one in her life will help her but me!
Q. I'm positive my ex-girlfriend has a Narcissistic Personality disorder. I once told her of my suspicions that she may have a mild bi-polar disorder called hypomania on the phone after we broke up and she flipped out. So, then I sent her a letter with ...
A. 5 June 2008: I agree with my friend Tisha here... But I might be a little more brutal than she's suggesting. I would just drop off the grid completely. Change your cell number, home numbers if possible... put a filter on your email messages... drop out of sight. ... (read in full...)
Is there any way I can stop my jaw getting sore during oral sex?
Q. This is a little awkward to ask, but what the hell I suppose. I really enjoy giving blow jobs to my boyfriend. I love that I can get him off that way. But I always find my jaw gets incredibly sore after a while, so I have to stop, and that's n...
A. 5 June 2008: I love Google! Just for the hell of it, I entered your question into their search engine and came up with this page:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/pm_fellatio.shtml
And lifting straight from their text:
"One common problem women performing... (read in full...)
Are my pubes too long?
Q. How do I know when my pubes are to long? And how do girls like pubes long,trim or shaved off? Any advice for me?...
A. 5 June 2008: What's too long? I mean, if you think they are too long, you're welcome to trim your hair.... (read in full...)
I had anal sex, is there any possible way I might be pregnant?
Q. I'm 16, My boyfriend and I have been messing around and have only had anal sex! I have missed my period and I'm very moody! It there any possible way that I could be pregnant? Please help I'm so scared!...Thank You...x...
A. 4 June 2008: The chances of getting pregnant from anal sex is rare if not non-existent. Only under the strangest of situations could semen have leaked out from your anal cavity to your vagina... and then to be introduced an egg ready for fertilization.
But, ... (read in full...)
I have been married for 10 years but not feel satisfied emotionally nor physically.
Q. I've been married since 10 years. I am not satisfied not emotionally not physically. I tried my level best to add spice in my marriage but cant get success. I am tired and frustreted because of lack of sex as well as emotional private time. Now a ...
A. 4 June 2008: My opinion is that there's a possibility something psychological is going on behind the scene. What that is would be anyone's guess. But to me, it seems that couple's therapy would help to start open that necessary dialog you guys need. If you two ... (read in full...)
Is there anything I can do about the saggy skin in my vagina?
Q. This is going to sound a bit... odd, but its something that ive recently noticed. When shaving my pubic hair, i realised one side of my vagina is loose and saggy where as the other isnt.. its not really something im proud of as i am only 18. Is ...
A. 4 June 2008: Everyone comes in all shapes and sizes. I think that you really don't have anything to get fixed. Where we think of ourselves as being symmetrical, we really aren't. Having one side "saggy" us not abnormal in any way...
Now, can you get it fixed... (read in full...)
I love my best friend but she is now loves a guy she just met!!
Q. I'm in love with my best friend but she is now head over heels with some guy shes just met, just because he has long dark hair. The thing is that everyone we know says we are the perfect couple and i know we are but all she can think about is him, ...
A. 4 June 2008: So, have you expressed your love to your best friend? Does she know that you've got an interest in dating her? If she's not aware of it, then you should make your interests known a little clearer. Maybe she's confiding in you because she still sees ... (read in full...)
I am confused by her signals............
Q. I really liked this girl that I went to high school with but we hardly talked. I was-kind of a loner and she was very social. She would give me signs that she liked me but it would happen every once in a while. I sent her a couple messages...
A. 4 June 2008: Do you have her regular email address? I really hate MySpace email system and think it's annoying to use. If you've got an external address, try that instead. Personally, I wouldn't read too much into a MySpace snuff -- if she hasn't told you to ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my wife wanting to be a surrogate mother to help her twin sister have a child?
Q. Hi everyone. I came home Monday happy to be home to my wife and our newborn twins. I was met at the door by my wife who excitely told me that she wants to carry a baby for her twin sister. She is 41. Her sister recently recovered from breast canc...
A. 4 June 2008: There's an interesting thing to think about here. Neither you and your brother-in-law are ever going to be as close to your wives as your wives are to themselves. Twins have an extremely strong bond between them (something a lot of sociologist could ... (read in full...)
My problem is that she seems to believe that I am stupid!
Q. A little background first. I am a 22 year old male dating a 20 year old single mother. He have known each other since High School and dated one for a short period of time. My problem is that she seems to believe that I am stupid. When asking about ...
A. 2 June 2008: I COMPLETELY agree with rhythmandblues2's advice! You either need to be respected or you need to move on... So, I second the motion on the floor!... (read in full...)
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