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... Send *eterPan a private message | | | *eterPan's profile:What qualifies me to answer your relationship question? ...I'm human too? Seriously, I'm probably no more qualified than anyone else, but at the same time, I've dated quite a bit... been married and divorced (so I guess I know what *doesn't* work).
Plus, this seemed interesting. At the very least, I know I'm not the only one out there suffering and trying to figure out a path through life... If my experiences can help you from falling into a sinkhole, then all the better, right? :) Also, I get a big kick out of helping my fell-man ..um, woman-kind too ;)
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My BF of 4 years constantly cheats on me and does not even try to hide it...
Q. My boyfriend of 4 yrs ( within this time frame has been unfaithful over 6 or more times that I am aware of) but within the last year has been faithful until 6 months ago, but now is in another side bar relationship with a married women, I also know ...
A. 2 June 2008: Vaya con Dios... be strong!... (read in full...)
I've shaved my pubic area... Now what do I expect? Is there a major risk of ingrown hairs or itches?
Q. My question is simple guys - I've shaved 'down there'... Now what do I expect? Will it start growing back straight away? Is there a big risk of in-growing hairs? I'm really worried about those! Will it hurt and itch and never grow back the same aga...
A. 1 June 2008: I should have thought about that a little more... so let me fix the coarse hair part... FOR A GUY'S FACIAL HAIR, it will get thicker over time as you continue to shave. But that's probably because we tend to shave everyday and we're loaded with ... (read in full...)
I'm willing to have anal sex though I have no clue about it. Can anyone please give me advice?
Q. My boyfriend has asked me to have anal sex with him, im willing to do it but i have never done it before. Can anyone please tell me does it hurt or any advice, tips, etc. Thanks xxx...
A. 1 June 2008: My personal approach regarding any given question like this would be to NOT make judgement calls unless specifically asked to do so.
This question was regarding anal sex, does it hurt and if there were any tips that could be offered. I did my b... (read in full...)
He was still saying he misses me the morning of the break up! Do you think there's a chance I can get him back?
Q. early may - i told bf we needed a break 2 days later - he moved to another city i sent him off at the airport next day - we talked about our issues on MSN and solved it. After which things were great 2 weeks later - I visited him in his new ...
A. 1 June 2008: Sorry -- I never watched enough of that show to know the intimate details, but at least I know what you're talking about. :)... (read in full...)
I've shaved my pubic area... Now what do I expect? Is there a major risk of ingrown hairs or itches?
Q. My question is simple guys - I've shaved 'down there'... Now what do I expect? Will it start growing back straight away? Is there a big risk of in-growing hairs? I'm really worried about those! Will it hurt and itch and never grow back the same aga...
A. 31 May 2008: Yeah, it can be. But don't worry about it too much -- I mean, you're getting worked up over something that might not happen at all (or very infrequently).
When I get in-grown hairs (and mind you, this is for my face you might find this a little d... (read in full...)
I'm willing to have anal sex though I have no clue about it. Can anyone please give me advice?
Q. My boyfriend has asked me to have anal sex with him, im willing to do it but i have never done it before. Can anyone please tell me does it hurt or any advice, tips, etc. Thanks xxx...
A. 31 May 2008: First, yes -- it might hurt if you are not properly lubricated and relaxed. The muscles around your anus are designed to keep things in and not let them out readily. I did a fast Google search and found this link -- there's tons more stuff out there ... (read in full...)
I've shaved my pubic area... Now what do I expect? Is there a major risk of ingrown hairs or itches?
Q. My question is simple guys - I've shaved 'down there'... Now what do I expect? Will it start growing back straight away? Is there a big risk of in-growing hairs? I'm really worried about those! Will it hurt and itch and never grow back the same aga...
A. 31 May 2008: Oh, one more tip: I get in-grown hair on my face all the time. To help lift it, I use the course side of a wash cloth when I'm showing, but nonetheless sometimes still get them. If you continue to shave, the hair will probably get more course itself ... (read in full...)
I've shaved my pubic area... Now what do I expect? Is there a major risk of ingrown hairs or itches?
Q. My question is simple guys - I've shaved 'down there'... Now what do I expect? Will it start growing back straight away? Is there a big risk of in-growing hairs? I'm really worried about those! Will it hurt and itch and never grow back the same aga...
A. 31 May 2008: Your hair will definitely grow back. Shaving is (obviously) not a permanent removal of hair. And, biologically speaking, your hair has never stopped growing. As far as in-grown hair, if you have curly hair, then you might have something to worry ... (read in full...)
Do I let them be happy together or what can I do to get him back?
Q. I would like to tell you the whole story and maybe you could understand better but it's way too long and you'll propably get bored but heres the basics : -Meet boy -Start dating boy -Loose virginity to boy -Two weeks later we brake up -I try e...
A. 31 May 2008: I'm going to answer this question by turning the tables on you. Suppose for a minute that the BF was your best friend's instead of you. They broke up and then you come along expressing interest. She had tried all she could to get back with the BF, ... (read in full...)
I just cant understand why he would suddenly hate me..is this normal?
Q. hello everyone I have a big problem in my life right now. My ex, we both promised to stay friends if we ever lost our relationship well its been ended for a month now and he hates me. Noone including myself knows why. I was a very good gf to him.....
A. 31 May 2008: Listen, let him move on and you do the same! The planet is filled with so many other guys out there just dying for your attention. Don't let this fool and his adolescent ways effect you and your future happiness! Having one less friend in the world ... (read in full...)
How can I go about living my life without romance and yet, not feel lonely?!
Q. Before I bore you with my story, I just want to throw the question out there - How can I go about living my life without romance and yet, not feel lonely?! It all started a year ago when I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years. I felt we weren't ...
A. 31 May 2008: Wow... you hit on a big one here. But, I do understand your issue. I'm kind of in the same boat myself. How am I dealing with it? I'm not sure I have the magic answer... but I will say that I rely on my friends (in a relationship or not) to give me ... (read in full...)
I just cant understand why he would suddenly hate me..is this normal?
Q. hello everyone I have a big problem in my life right now. My ex, we both promised to stay friends if we ever lost our relationship well its been ended for a month now and he hates me. Noone including myself knows why. I was a very good gf to him.....
A. 31 May 2008: Straight up, it sounds like he's brooding over the break up. To me, it seems like you should give him space and time to heal up. It's been a month and depending on how long you were going out together, it might take more than a month to be square ... (read in full...)
I don't want to ruin our friendship with my feelings for him-help!
Q. Well, I'm a tomboy, crazy, adventerous, deadly tomboy. For the longest time, I've had guy friends. now I do have girls that are friends but then one started saying that one would look good with me. That got me thinking,'Yea right,' Hes pretty b...
A. 31 May 2008: It seems like the next time you get him in a talkative place, you turn the tables on him and start poking questions about how he feels about you, you know? You're not going to be able to resolve anything until you find out what's in his head. I ... (read in full...)
Help-how do we stop his past fling from pestering us now?
Q. i just found out my husband had a short affair with a co-worker that was black mailing him i want to forgive him and we both want to move on with our 10 year marriage im scared and i don't know how to let go of all the crazy thoughts in my mind ...
A. 31 May 2008: First, deal with yourselves -- that will be the hardest. I recommend that you guys get into marriage concealing where a professional can work with you together and help you get over the hump and forgive.
Next, I'm going to assume that the co-worke... (read in full...)
Will I ever get over this and/or will I ever be able to trust him again?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for two years. It's been very hard. At the begining he got hooked on drugs (light drugs). He begged me to help im stop. I did, but I went through hell trying to get him off them. He became abusive verbally...
A. 31 May 2008: I am sorry that you are so torn up by these events. Personally, forgiveness is one of the greats gifts we humans can give to one another. It has the capacity to heal and mend wounds... so, if you have it within your heart to forgive, it will ... (read in full...)
He was still saying he misses me the morning of the break up! Do you think there's a chance I can get him back?
Q. early may - i told bf we needed a break 2 days later - he moved to another city i sent him off at the airport next day - we talked about our issues on MSN and solved it. After which things were great 2 weeks later - I visited him in his new ...
A. 31 May 2008: Wow... interesting story... well, there's always a chance (I'm an optimist). It is completely possible that he was overloaded with all the activities that he's trying to juggle and spoke impulsively... but, you're not going to know until you can ... (read in full...)
I met my GF 6 years ago and to this day she is unaware of my real age!
Q. alright i have been with my girlfriend for 6 years,problem is when we met she was 20 and i was 14 but i told her i was 16 it was still young but not as bad i knew if told her my real age she wouldn't take a second look at me.im now 18 and she's ...
A. 30 May 2008: I agree with all the previous comments. It's time to come clean and tell her the truth. She's going to figure it out for herself if she ever sees your driver's license and I would think it would be better to tell her than to discover it for herself ... (read in full...)
My long distance GF is moving close to me but I recently started feeling that we are totally wrong for each other!...
Q. I have been seeing my gf for 7 years. We began dating in college and continued to date through grad school but at that point it was long distance. I guess we have had a long distance relationship for 4 years. Now she is finally moving to be near me ...
A. 30 May 2008: If possible, please talk to you girlfriend about how you feel. You really need to come clean here and express all that you're feeling and see if she's feeling the same way (she might be). It would be cruel to let her move closer to you while you're ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling neglected...is he being a bit selfish?
Q. I'm dating older guy (47), I'm 39. Things are somewhat ok. Lately, I feel neglected. It seems like all I do is play taxi/chauffer to him. All we do is go to stores and out to eat. How do I tell him I need more excitment than just going out to ...
A. 30 May 2008: One suggestion is to start making plans that include more activities that you would like to do and tell him what they are in advance.
It's not really possible to tell from your information here if he's being selfish. Has his workload increase... (read in full...)
My BF of 4 years constantly cheats on me and does not even try to hide it...
Q. My boyfriend of 4 yrs ( within this time frame has been unfaithful over 6 or more times that I am aware of) but within the last year has been faithful until 6 months ago, but now is in another side bar relationship with a married women, I also know ...
A. 30 May 2008: I've used this phrase with others, now it's your turn... It's time to trade up!
So, let's review... he cheats on you (and is not only forthright about it, but is a repeat offender), he lives with his ex-wife (hmmm), and has some kind of commitme... (read in full...)
Is a blow job for a groom a tradition?
Q. Hey sisters and brothers Just a funny one Just spoke to some friends ... bullshitting .. question was DO you think its a tradition for a GROOM to get blown at a bachelore party??? 95%guys said YES! So, how do you guys feel over here? J...
A. 30 May 2008: Funny answer? OK... I wished I had known that was tradition the weekend I got married!!!... (read in full...)
Will I ever find another girl like her, who loves me as much as she does?
Q. hello everyone. So me and my gf of a year and a half have been having alota problems. Its got to the point where im not happy anymore and iv been thinking about us breaking up for a while. Two days ago i mentioned us breaking up and iv been trying ...
A. 29 May 2008: I read your previous question and the advice handed out there... and it seems that things haven't changed much in your head, right?
Well, there's two ways to go with this: stick with the relationship and suffer silently as she is complete... (read in full...)
Worried about this girl and my boyfriend... am I right to be worried?
Q. hi everyone ok now i might just b goin crazy or im reacting the way i should! my boyfriend is going out 2nite 2 watch hockey with a bunch of his friends he couldnt find a ride(his car is crap) so he resulted in calling one of my friends well ...
A. 29 May 2008: First I would say don't get yourself all worked up about something that might happen or not at all. I suppose what I'm saying is you need to put some faith into your boyfriend to not do anything with her even if she tempts him with her best A-game. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is going to be gone for a year! I'm not sure I can wait for him like that, what should I do?
Q. my bf is going to Peru to visit his family for the summer but i just found out he has to stay there for a year. weve been going together for 4 months but i dotn know if i can wait for him like that. what should i do??...
A. 29 May 2008: I'm not sure what you're asking here... are you worried that you might be unfaithful in a year's time, or you're worried about being away from him for all that time.
If it's the second one, then I might suggest possibly visiting him in Peru abo... (read in full...)
I like this one guy and I think he likes me, but his friend also likes me and I don't want to ruin their friendship. Any advice?
Q. Dear Cupid, I like this one guy and I think he likes me. The only thing is his friend likes me and I don't want to ruin thier friendship cause of me. I'm going to ask the guy I like out and I think he will say yes. What I'm trying to get at is do ...
A. 29 May 2008: This is kind of one of those situations where somebody's going to get hurt. Actually, assuming that you and the one you like start dating, it's going to be a test of the two guy's friendship on just how tight they are. Unfortunately, I don't think ... (read in full...)
How do I politely turn him down and still maintain a good working environment?
Q. Help!! I just started a new job and my coworker is clearly interested in dating me. I hung out with him and had a drink on the weekend thinking it was totally casual but it is clear now that he is interested and I am not. He keeps calling and of ...
A. 29 May 2008: Hmm... how about just pulling him aside for a private conversation. Explain to him that because you're working together it's not possible to have a relationship with him... and hopefully your company is large enough to have an employee manual that ... (read in full...)
I hate everything about my boyfriend but I love him more than anything in the world... should I leave him?
Q. I hate everything about my boyfriend but I love him more than anything in the world... should I leave him? I used to trust him, I used to feel comfortable with him in public, I used to enjoy having him around, I used to like doing things for him, ...
A. 28 May 2008: Whoa! After reading all that, yeah I completely agree with Tisha -- loose this one... like 5 minutes ago! It took you a page to get to the only thing you like about him -- the way he kisses you -- there are ton of lips attached to better men -- go ... (read in full...)
I want my ex back. She hasn't left my head since the breakup, but my present relationship...
Q. I've never posted on a site like this before but I feel so screwed up over this i figure any advice will help and there's nobody I can talk to about it really... Anywho 1st december last year I started going out with a girl and we had a great ...
A. 28 May 2008: OK, I think I followed most of this... more or less... I hope. If I boil this whole thing down, you're wondering if you should try to go out with GF-1 (the one that broke everything off while you were on vacation, but haunts your mind) or stick with ... (read in full...)
Why is his family trying to split us up?
Q. I am in a very serious relationship with a boy. We are engaged and everything. One thing really bothers me though... His family is constantly trying to get him to talk to or get back with one of his ex's (and If it doesn't work with one they move to ...
A. 28 May 2008: Hmm... this is kind of bad. I'm not sure what advice to offer you on this specific case, but here's something I thought about reading your question. If your boyfriend (soon to be husband)'s family is meddling in his life now, do you think it would ... (read in full...)
Did my calling him have any effect on him? Does he like me?
Q. My crush send me a message that he's going deployed next thursday to Asia. So, I called him on the phone to wish him good luck. He was very surprised mainly cuz he's stationed in NC and I'm in Fla. so we keep contact by email. In his message ...
A. 28 May 2008: Fantastic!! I'm happy for you!!... (read in full...)
Should I not even speak to him, and feel sorry for her for being used?
Q. This guy has been demonstrating to be attracted to me for the past few months, yet I have reason to believe he just got a blow job from another female at work. What's this all about? Guess I'll drop out of the picture totally and not even speak to ...
A. 27 May 2008: First thought that comes to mind is a legal term: heresy. How do you actually know that this happened? I mean, who/what is your source? ...and what's their relationship to all this? ...somebody that might prefer you not be interested in this guy? ... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant after a negative test or am I just imagining things?
Q. I recently had a pregnancy test after experiencing signs of pregnancy for instance, sore breats, feeling sick and not being able to smell food without feeling sik etc. It Showed up negative yet these signs have not gone. Could I Still be pregnant...
A. 27 May 2008: I suppose that depends on the test. If it was one of those home-pregnancy tests, then yes you could be pregnant even if the test showed negative. The only why to be sure one way or the other is a medical exam and testing. If you've had the medical ... (read in full...)
Do all males experience pre-cum?
Q. Hey, I'm just wondering... Do all males experience pre-cum?...
A. 27 May 2008: Yes, it's completely common and a biological response to stimulation prior to ejaculation. I suppose the only variant is how much and how soon before ejaculating.... (read in full...)
Is this bachelor party a celebration of marriage or cheating?
Q. hi so i found out my bf went for a bachelore party. he told me they had normal strippers. unfortunately i found out, that those "strippers" were fingering each other and using other stuff to please themseves infront of the guys and also giving d...
A. 27 May 2008: It's been my experience that all levels of debauchery can happen at a bachelor party. If your fiancee says he didn't partake, then believe him. Those parties are more like an excuse for your "wilder friends" to "cut loose" than for your fiancee's ... (read in full...)
Why does she treat me like dirt?
Q. I have been seeing a woman for 6 months, there have been good times and bad times, but overall there has been progress...and that is what keeps me in this relationship. However, I am burnt out and my heart is dying, and on the two occassions I pla...
A. 27 May 2008: I completely agree with all the others here. It's not going to get better (or there's little likelihood of it). Unfortunately, I'd say cut your losses and find that one woman out there that's waiting for you to bump into her coming out of a ... (read in full...)
How can I make sure it's better this time?
Q. I'm sorry this is long, but it's quite complicated. Please hear me out lol! I got back with my ex 3 days ago. We had been split up for 3 and a half weeks and had been going out for 1 year before we split. I really loved this man, I still do and I...
A. 27 May 2008: Straight up, I think that the root of your issues is the communication... or rather, the lack of proper communication skills between you. I think that you and your BF/fiancee need to learn to openly speak with each other. Let me recommend that you ... (read in full...)
Is my problem insecurity or not?
Q. is my problem insecurity or not. i love my boyfriend very as he loves me. at times i know that he loves me and at times i just think he's out just for the physical thing. well, he is very charming and galz do love his company... he likes making ...
A. 27 May 2008: To me, it sounds like you do have an insecurity issue, but I think it's induced from your boyfriend's behavior. He seems to be showing you disrespect by making excessive comments about his other female friends. In a way, it seems that he insights ... (read in full...)
How else besides lab tests can a pregnancy be determined?
Q. IF a woman is suspected to be pregnant, what other means of test aside from lab tests can it be proven. like what color her vaginal secretions are? are they sticky or what?...
A. 27 May 2008: There are pregnancy tests that are usually available at pharmacies. I can't think of any specific names of the products, but I'm sure somebody at the pharmacy can help you. It's my understanding that some of those tests are not the most accurate. A ... (read in full...)
Should I try to talk to him again?
Q. I was with my ex for a year. We broke up 4 months ago. It's been hard for me. I wish that I could have did things different. There was no cheating or nothing like that. We just had problems like any other couple have. I would lash out at him alot ...
A. 27 May 2008: I think that you should try to have a conversation with your ex. It seems like he's eager to patch things up and there's nothing wrong with talking if you're interested in trying to reconcile the problems.
Assuming that you guys decide to try a... (read in full...)
I'm ready for sex but she isn't yet, what can I do?
Q. i know this girl that im going out with, we've been goin out for about 6 months but i've known since i was a kid. i love her with all my heart but im ready to have sex with her but she worried that she'll get pregnant since her friend got pregnant ...
A. 26 May 2008: "The Fine Art of Caring for a Woman" -- Chapter 1...
DO NOT force your girlfriend to expand beyond the limits of her comfort-zone. An intimate sexual encounter is comprised to two things:
1) A willing and giving female that is truly interested... (read in full...)
Any tips on how to give oral? I've been trying for years!
Q. i want to give my husband oral sex but every time i put his penis in my mouth i start to gag and i dont like the feeling. i have been trying for years to give him oral does any one have any tips how to over come this problem i have as i really want ...
A. 26 May 2008: Here's a suggested reading for you. I passed this along to somebody else I advised here. Hopefully, you'll find some good pointers here:
http://theovereducatednympho.com/2007/03/14/blowjob-part-3-hand-mouth/
... (read in full...)
He won't even look at me now... He is a good man, has a loving heart but he is too flirty...this is a teacher I dated!
Q. I recently dated this teacher of mind. He is still married with kids. We split due to him wanting to reconcile with his wife and that split lead to many more controversy to the point where he almost got sent to prison and fired. But now i still have ...
A. 26 May 2008: May I add a few things here? You said that he almost got sent to prison... I'm assuming it was for statutory rape. That said, it's not hard for me to see why he's avoiding contact with you. He (and you) are probably being watched closely by the ... (read in full...)
Please, no dumb answers...how do I get this weight off ASAP?
Q. Hey, I am overweight . I'm 14 years old and the scale says i'm 195 pounds. Thats wayyyyyy over average for 14 year old females. School has been out since May 22 and all my best friends are swimming and i'm the only one who isnt! And its all because ...
A. 26 May 2008: Emivia has great advice -- follow it! But let me give you another tip; it something I noticed for myself.
First, you really need to take a critical look at all the foods that you are consuming and evaluate their value. For instance, do you drin... (read in full...)
Is he secretly Bi?
Q. i'm bi and my friends know that. i lik 1 of them but he's straight and when i flirt with him like nudge him for example he nudges back. Then when i do it again he does it again. Is he secretly for guys aswell as girls or does he not know it yet? t...
A. 26 May 2008: I'd say that's nowhere near enough information to figure out if he's bi or not. Nudging, pushing and the like are normal tendencies for adolescent boys and you shouldn't make the assumption that if he physically makes contact with you in this manner ... (read in full...)
I want to stop being so scared of approaching him and try to talk to him!
Q. Ello. Ok my problem is..a guy problem. Well I've pretty much had a HUGE crush on a guy since he moved to my town and we were in 3rd grade. Now we are in 9th grade. I still REALLY like him! He had a girlfriend not too long ago but they broke up a ...
A. 26 May 2008: This trick works for some people... maybe it will work for you. Some people who are petrified with fear try to visualize themselves successfully speaking or acting in a situation that brings them fear. In other words, they see them selves having a ... (read in full...)
I have trouble keeping an erection.
Q. hi im a 24 year old man who has trouble keeping an erection.i can usually stay erect for 15 minutes,after that it turns into a semi,another problem i have is i can't ejaculate during sex,i always start off with the first part of an orgasm and then ...
A. 26 May 2008: Look -- if you've been carrying this depression for a while now, please speak with you GP. He might recommend that you seek a little psychological therapy to help clear that guilt and performance anxiety you're carrying around. Although I'm not one ... (read in full...)
I have trouble keeping an erection.
Q. hi im a 24 year old man who has trouble keeping an erection.i can usually stay erect for 15 minutes,after that it turns into a semi,another problem i have is i can't ejaculate during sex,i always start off with the first part of an orgasm and then ...
A. 25 May 2008: This might not be your issue, but sometimes sexual disfunction might have something to do with your own mind working against you. If you're carrying guilt or depression, they can effect your sexual performance. There are lots of men that have issues ... (read in full...)
Did my calling him have any effect on him? Does he like me?
Q. My crush send me a message that he's going deployed next thursday to Asia. So, I called him on the phone to wish him good luck. He was very surprised mainly cuz he's stationed in NC and I'm in Fla. so we keep contact by email. In his message ...
A. 21 May 2008: Sounds promising to me!... (read in full...)
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