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Aunt here since 2009.

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About Facebook and relationships

This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...

Is Pornography cheating?

This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...

< Prev345678910111213Next > [118 pages, 4696 answers]

Wife don't have a job and doesn't like to cook or clean the house.

Q.   I've dated my wife for almost 10 years before we got married for 5 years, ever since I met her she never have a job. Reason I like about her was she was very old school like my mom and I thought she would make a great mom one day and she's very ...

A.   3 July 2013: I am not normally a fan of ultimatums, but it might be time for one. That she gets a job or picks up the slack around the house, or you need a divorce. I agree with SVC, someone who is that much of a shut in may have some kind of social anxiety ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend watches porn, what should I do? It hurts!

Q.   So I recently found out that my boyfriend is watching porn. Although he always brags about our sex life with one of his best friends. He told him that he doesn't need porn and stuff like that beacause I give him all the pleasure he needs and it made ...

A.   3 July 2013: I have many many links on my profile that may help you out, please take a look at them. They are the ones in the blue box: http://www.dearcupid.org/people/person12345... (read in full...)

I say he is the most disloyal man ever and he says he is just being honest about his emotions. What do I do?

Q.   I am so sad and tired. My boyfriend of 6 years has become completely disloyal to me. One example, We auditioned for a play together recently and I was disappointed that I did not make callbacks and therefore would not be getting a speaking part in ...

A.   3 July 2013: I think you already know what you have to do, that is why you are asking a question. The man obviously has some serious issues with kindness and manners and that was NOT OK for him to wreck your relationship with that director. Unless he is ... (read in full...)

What is the truth about libido? My man has been impotent since his 40s.

Q.   The curiosity is killing me, but I cant find the rght answer anywhere. I keep hearing about man , who goes impotent and age 40, and than the doctors, and people are saying , oh it happens all the time, and its just natural aging. Yet, I keep ...

A.   1 July 2013: I think you should listen to the doctors. They should rule out physical problems as well as psychological. Doctors are definitely more reliable than we are, good as our intentions may be.... (read in full...)

We have sex 3 times a week, what can I do to boost my sex drive?

Q.   Hello dear cupid I have a serious issue. ..I am 22 and my fiance is 27 we have a great relationship outside of the sex department. ...we have a handsome 9 month old, truly faithful to one another, and pursuing to be successful for our family...the ...

A.   29 June 2013: To add on the great advice below: How satisfied are you when you do have sex? Do you orgasm easily every time or almost every time? Do you feel like your needs are a priority? Does your husband equally share in childcare and housework? All are ... (read in full...)

My B/f keeps interrogating me about my past and if he were to ever find out I have lied, he will end things. What should I do?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for about a year and he is te type of person that just about interrogates me about guys in my past. I have nothing to be ashamed about and have only been with one person before him. He always asks about stupid things ...

A.   28 June 2013: He has retrograde jealousy, which as you wish said, is a form of OCD. There is no possible answer you could give him that will calm him down. The only possible answer you could ever give that would be satisfying would be that you were in a coma ... (read in full...)

I don't like it that my boyfriend has started using instagram

Q.   I am 27 years old and have been with my boyfriend for almost a year. I know he loves me very much and we both see a longterm future together. He recently started using instagram. I have a jealousy over it for some reason..i feely silly but it's h...

A.   27 June 2013: Yes you are way overreacting. He isn't even the one liking these pages, he is just friends with people who do. Yes he sees them. He also sees Maxim in the supermarket and Victoria's Secret ads and all sorts of other overly sexualized images of ... (read in full...)

Is he having trouble with sex because of my body? Or something else?

Q.   So, my fiance and I have been together for almost three years, and most everything has been great. The one thing that really concerns me happens during sex. He has a very difficult time getting and remaining erect, as well as reaching orgasm, ...

A.   27 June 2013: Agree with CindyCares. The only guys who seem to only be able to finish with "extreme" sex acts like money shots are the ones who watch way too much porn. Since he is actively having trouble staying hard, I would venture it's bordering on, if it ... (read in full...)

Okay for a model girlfriend to kiss another guy model for photo shoot???

Q.   My girlfriend does allot of modeling and yesterday she told me that she might be in a photo shoot where she will have to kiss another guy model. I'll be honest and say I am very protective of her and I don't even like the idea of a guy touching her ...

A.   25 June 2013: I do a lot of modeling and acting meaning I have to kiss and touch and do semi-intimate things with other guys so I can provide some insight perhaps. Kissing someone for a shoot or on set does not really feel like kissing. There is just so much ... (read in full...)

My Boyfriend thinks I'm a masochist! Am I???

Q.   Please don't judge me. I am 18 yrs old. Im a very quiet and shy person. I have only had sex with one guy which is my boyfriend. My bf and i have sex alot and its always the pain that turns me on. My favorite is the neck biting. I like for him to ...

A.   25 June 2013: Yes you are a masochist. A masochist is someone who gets sexual pleasure from pain. There are all sorts of other subtleties and subcultures of it, but in it's most basic form, yes you are a masochist.... (read in full...)

Its false projecting when she's making her lips look larger than they are!

Q.   I met this girl, who is incredibly beautiful, funny, smart and so easy to get along with! One the thing that I found alluring about her was the fullness of her lips. And we've been on a few dates and yesterday we went out in the day and I noticed ...

A.   25 June 2013: "I said that I thought it was weird that she did that and why didn't she just embrace her natural lips." Why? Because: "One the thing that I found alluring about her was the fullness of her lips." I mean it's makeup. Yeah it's kind of fake, b... (read in full...)

Boyfriend can't make me cum so I took care of myself but he woke up and caught me and is angry!

Q.   Hello aunts and uncles Bf and me have an ok sex life... he gets it anytime he wants, but since he works so many hours I do not initiate(I pounce on his days off) and let him rest during the work days. i never cum unless I touch myself, but h...

A.   21 June 2013: That's really, really ridiculous. So he can't make you orgasm, but expects you not to do it yourself? He can't demand you not have orgasms to spare his ego. That's just a ridiculous request. On top of that, he's an enormous hypocrite! It's OK for ... (read in full...)

Is it appropriate to give the mother an anniversary gift?

Q.   Hi, I have a quick question having more to do with etiquette. I've been exclusively dating a guy for a couple of months and we've hit it off extraordinarily well, so we are pretty serious about each other. We're in our late twenties and his parents ...

A.   21 June 2013: That seems really sweet to me. Thoughtful, but not over the top.... (read in full...)

He gave me his cell phone number--is he interested? I don't want to misinterpret his actions

Q.   Some guy(I see him barely once in a WHILE and just say hi to) recently chatted with me a bit more about himself and just as he was about to leave gave me his business card offering his services but he also says he wrote his cell number just if I ...

A.   21 June 2013: It's certainly promising that he reciprocates. I think it would be safe to send a text saying something like thanks for help and offer and such and you'd love to chat more about it over coffee or lunch.... (read in full...)

Boyfriend wants a threesome. How do I handle this?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3 years, and have a great, caring, passionate relationship together. We often go out on a date night, go to our friends parties, etc together. Although neither of us are eachother's first long-term relati...

A.   21 June 2013: Agree with what everyone else said. In order to be depriving him, it has to be something he was going to have but gave up to be with you. I know like 5 people, maybe, who have done threesomes. And none of them actually enjoyed it (all just enjoyed ... (read in full...)

Gave him oral sex, he cumed quickly after around four minutes what does that mean ??

Q.   Last night i gave oral sex to my boyfriend. i sucked his dick. We've been talking for a while and we recently made it official. So I'm not sure what he's done when we were "just talking". Last night when i gave him head , he told me i was good. ...

A.   17 June 2013: It means he liked what you were doing and there's nothing more to read into it. It doesn't mean he has had it done recently, or that he hasn't. I think that if you weren't official yet though, it wouldn't really matter what he did.... (read in full...)

I want to lose my virginity with her but will I regret it later because of the circumstances?

Q.   Hi, I'm a 26 year old male virgin. I was offered by a air hostess to 'be' with her next week. I do have to pay so she is offering sex as a service. I am seriously thinking about it and was just wondering if I should do it. I just want to get...

A.   17 June 2013: "I don't see how money changing hands makes the act of fucking them somehow disgusting," It makes a pretty big difference actually... It is the difference between having sex with a willing partner or having sex with someone who doesn't want to ... (read in full...)

Sex is different with my wife after our brief seperation

Q.   After a short seperation my wife and I recently got back together again. we've been marrried 30 years. I've was worried she made have had an affair while we were seperated. after having sex with her for the first time in over a year I thought she ...

A.   17 June 2013: Male anon no one is saying he shouldn't know, I'm not sure how you got from point A to point B there. What he is saying is that he suspects lying based on something that is medically impossible. Can you please point out the answer here where someone ... (read in full...)

Am I overreacting or was it just the drink making him be like this

Q.   Hi, I am confused over the actions of my date the other night. It was a first date and we went to a baseball game together, he initially seemed very sweet, smart, good conversationalist. We went to several bars after the game where we contined...

A.   17 June 2013: What a creep. He's aggressive, selfish, and won't take no for an answer. What if you had gone back to his place and he wouldn't take no for an answer there? You dodged a bullet with this guy.... (read in full...)

Sex is different with my wife after our brief seperation

Q.   After a short seperation my wife and I recently got back together again. we've been marrried 30 years. I've was worried she made have had an affair while we were seperated. after having sex with her for the first time in over a year I thought she ...

A.   16 June 2013: Who told you that? Because they are wrong. What probably has actually happened is that since you two haven't had sex in a year, everything feels different because it's been so long. ... (read in full...)

Sex is different with my wife after our brief seperation

Q.   After a short seperation my wife and I recently got back together again. we've been marrried 30 years. I've was worried she made have had an affair while we were seperated. after having sex with her for the first time in over a year I thought she ...

A.   15 June 2013: There are only a few things that can change the tightness of a woman's vagina: childbirth, aging, surgery, and hormones. Sex cannot change a vagina's tightness, no matter how often or not often it occurs. Also the "farting" noise just happens ... (read in full...)

How can we make sex last longer?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year and a half now, and we recently became fully sexually active about two months ago. I was a virgin, and he was still healing from past catastrophic relationships. The last time he was active was ...

A.   14 June 2013: Has he been to a doctor to check for any physical problems, like hormone imbalances?... (read in full...)

How can we make sex last longer?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together almost a year and a half now, and we recently became fully sexually active about two months ago. I was a virgin, and he was still healing from past catastrophic relationships. The last time he was active was ...

A.   14 June 2013: This is actually pretty common among some guys who have been single for awhile. My first piece of advice would be for him to lay off masturbation for awhile. He may be desensitizing himself. That solves it in many many cases. If not, he could ju... (read in full...)

HPV from oral sex? Can someone explain?

Q.   HPV from oral sex, can someone please explain this to me? So you get the HPV in your throat by oral sex with someone who has slept with an infected person? How do you get tested? I have had quite a bit of unprotected oral sex as I'm guessing a lot ...

A.   9 June 2013: HPV can spread even with condom use unfortunately. The good news is that he vast majority of HPV does not cause cancer. The best thing for you to do is go talk to a doctor about getting tested orally. If it comes back positive you should be mindf... (read in full...)

Is it weird that I'm completely shaven down there now and my girlfriend isn't?

Q.   This question is about pubic hair shaving on men. I usually trim everything to a 1 on my electric trimmer and shave underneath the shaft and all of the scrotum; thus, leaving all the hair above and on the sides intact, albeit trimmed very short. ...

A.   9 June 2013: Hair grows back, mistakes happen. You are way over-thinking this. The only thing most women care about is that the hair is tidy and everything is clean.... (read in full...)

How much weight loss would be achieveable in 4 weeks time?

Q.   Ok I know this is not a diet and exercise board, but I also know a few of the aunts/uncles have mentioned losing weight in previous posts so I thought I might get some good advice here. So last week I started an exercise/fitness regime to try to...

A.   8 June 2013: 20 lbs in 4 weeks is not healthy or realistic and you will without question gain it back. Men and women lose weight very differently. Most men I know who lose weight have done most successfully by adding exercise and doing fad diets, while most ... (read in full...)

How to bring back the "honeymoon phase" in an 8 year relationship?

Q.   It's a cliche question, but I gotta ask it! I've been with my partner for 8 years now. First few years, very hot and heavy - we couldn't keep our hands off each other. You know, the honeymoon phase. I don't expect things to stay like they ...

A.   7 June 2013: So when dealing with a sex life stuck in a rut, the thing most people assume is that they have to spice up the sex, which doesn't really do much. It's a temporary fix. The real trick is to spice up the rest of the relationship and the sex comes with ... (read in full...)

How to reach a decision with my unplanned pregnancy?

Q.   i'm 26 and had planned to go back to study. I discovered I was pregnant a few months after getting laid off my job. Can things get any worse? My boyfriend wants to keep it but I'm not sure. I've been to counselling and it hasn't helped much. I'...

A.   5 June 2013: It seems pretty clear you know what is best for you in this situation and you should do it. A boyfriend might not be forever, but a child is. You need to make the choice that is best for you here. If your boyfriend can't cope with that, he's not the ... (read in full...)

My irrational fear of getting pregnant is stopping me from meeting guys.

Q.   Hi there, i'm sure this seems like a really stupid question but i just need some calming advice. I'm 22, still a virgin and only kissed a couple of guys. I dont have a problem with any of this however my problem is i have an irrational fear of ...

A.   3 June 2013: If you are certain you don't want kids, why not look into permanent sterilization? Or if that is not appealing (you think you might change your mind) get an IUD placed. They are VERY effective and if you use both that and a condom, your odds of ... (read in full...)

I'm hurting, in our 3 years he's cheated on me more than 5 times! How to prevent him from cheating again?

Q.   im currently in a relationship of 3 years and since we have been together my boy friend has cheated on me more than 5 time, and he just repeated now so I just don't know what to do! and he keeps on saying he loves me when I dump him... so how do I ...

A.   3 June 2013: You can't prevent him cheating, you just have to dump him and leave for good. He will never ever change, no matter what he says.... (read in full...)

Is cyber sex considered cheating?

Q.   Hi all, Just a question I would like to ask other users here. If you are in a loving, committed relationship with your soul mate whom you love dearly but find out they have meaningless cybersex (without masturbating) would you consider it chea...

A.   31 May 2013: Do NOT let this asshole convince you that this is YOUR FAULT. He cheated and is such an immature self-centered jerk that he would rather make you feel like crap than own up to his own mistakes. He cheated, got caught, and then manipulated you into... (read in full...)

Is cybersex cheating and is it forgivable?

Q.   My husband of 15 years was caught having an affair online with a colleague. He left "chat" open and I read all the sordid details. He claims everything happened online but I discovered they had plans to meet. I feel beyond betrayed and hurt and...

A.   31 May 2013: You can get over this and you can get through this. He isn't really giving you much choice other than to leave, I'm very sorry this has happened. He's refusing to accept responsibility for himself and isn't really putting in any effort to fix it ... (read in full...)

My husband always looks at other women and tells me that's normal. I can't bear it! Help?

Q.   whenever i am out with my husband, he always look at other womens which i can't bear. its hurting me always. due to which i don't talk to my husband 2-3 days. but still he does the same. i spoke to him about this. he says it's normal. but i can't ...

A.   29 May 2013: He's right, it is normal. Are you talking about staring so hard that he trips over things or a quick look? It's best for you to just stop looking for it and eventually you will stop noticing.... (read in full...)

Is cyber sex considered cheating?

Q.   Hi all, Just a question I would like to ask other users here. If you are in a loving, committed relationship with your soul mate whom you love dearly but find out they have meaningless cybersex (without masturbating) would you consider it chea...

A.   29 May 2013: I am not sure if you are talking about yourself or your partner here, but it sounds like your partner. It's really about how you feel. There is no cut and dry cheating versus not cheating, it's individual to each couple. Especially when it comes... (read in full...)

Feel dizzy/faint when touch vagina?

Q.   Hi. So just some background info.. I just turned 18, I'm not a virgin, I've had sex a few times but it was really painful each time so I kind of have avoided having sex since then. A couple of years ago, I tried putting in a tampon, and I pu...

A.   29 May 2013: You need to see a doctor to get to the root cause of that, because that's definitely not typical.... (read in full...)

Shouldn't watching porn boost his sexual drive?

Q.   So my boyfriend and i have only been dating for about 5 months, when we first got together, we had a very healthy and consistent sexual relationship as well, it hasnt really been that way, lately we've had sex maybe 3 times a month, and its not ...

A.   28 May 2013: Sometimes guys can become desensitized to sex by watching/masturbating to too much porn, to the point where they can't even get turned on without it anymore. It has nothing to do with your attractiveness, it's about brain wiring. Check out this... (read in full...)

I don't want to lose my marriage over porn...but I cannot trust someone who will look me in the face and lie.

Q.   My husband knows how I feel about watching porn behind my back and lying about it. I don't like him watching it at all because I know that my body doesnt compare to those girls (after having his baby my stomach was severely covered in stretch ...

A.   27 May 2013: I also have a lot of links on my profile you may find helpful. Best of luck.... (read in full...)

I don't want to lose my marriage over porn...but I cannot trust someone who will look me in the face and lie.

Q.   My husband knows how I feel about watching porn behind my back and lying about it. I don't like him watching it at all because I know that my body doesnt compare to those girls (after having his baby my stomach was severely covered in stretch ...

A.   26 May 2013: I think you two should seriously consider marriage counseling. In the meantime there is a book aimed at couples about this issue called "The Porn Trap" by Larry and Wendy Maltz that is definitely worth you two reading. It helps you understa... (read in full...)

Is it normal for ex wives/husbands going on vacation together normal?

Q.   I am on my third marriage/my wife also her third. My wife is going on vacation with her grown kids, grandchildren and with her ex husband from her first marriage. The ex is bringing his girlfriend also. I just find it strange that she would want to ...

A.   25 May 2013: I've known couples who do this without issue. It's not the norm, but I really don't think you have anything to worry about with his parents, girlfriend and child all present. Presumably she is going to spend time with her kids.... (read in full...)

My husband being a night owl is causing problems in our marriage

Q.   My husband is a night owl whilst i quite like my sleep! But the difference is annoying not only at home but socially. Like we were at a wedding yesterday and i had work the next day - i said maybe we could go home around 12. But we agreed o...

A.   25 May 2013: When my bf and I first moved in together it drove me crazy how late he liked to sleep while I liked to go to bed early. So I got myself some earplugs and a mask and went to bed before him. It did take awhile to adjust, I would toss and turn for ... (read in full...)

Will we be passing HPV back and forth if we keep having sex?

Q.   Hello, well a women friend of mine, had a pap smear, it came back she has hpv, am the only man she's been with in years, I'm wondering, I've been told it can up to 2 years for your immune system to clear it up, I know their is a lot of different ...

A.   25 May 2013: No it doesn't work like that. She can't "catch" this strain again because her body will recognize it. My understanding is that the virus never fully clears, it just "deactivates" and remains dormant. She will need to get regular pap smears because ... (read in full...)

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