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*erson12345

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Aunt here since 2009.

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About Facebook and relationships

This question has 7 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

12 October 2011: While generally facebook is considered a fun way to keep in touch with friends and share photos, it can be a huge source of turmoil in a relationship. If I had a dime for every time I read "I'm worried because I saw something on her/his facebook..." ...

Is Pornography cheating?

This question has 100 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

1 May 2011: The age old question on this site seems to be "is pornography use cheating?" My response to that first depends on how you define cheating. A relationship is basically a sexual contract, an agreement between two (sometimes more) people. These people ...

< Prev678910111213141516Next > [118 pages, 4696 answers]

I thought I was gay but I'm attracted to this girl..is it just a one time thing?

Q.   I'm a 19 year old guy. I've assumed I was gay since I was about 13. I tried to fight it at first because there was a stigma to being gay, but eventually I grew to accept it and had gay relationships and it really wasn't an issue anymore. But ...

A.   11 March 2013: Sexuality is very fluid and no one really exists in strict binaries. Just do whatever makes you happy without worrying too much about the label. You could certainly be mostly gay but find one or two women attractive.... (read in full...)

broke up with my boyfriend but he is still acting like one.

Q.   I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years about a month ago. He was jealous, controlling, he was lazy and lives with his mother. I was young at the start of the relationship so I was spoon fed everything he told me. I was young and silly so I flashed ...

A.   11 March 2013: This guy is clearly nuts, but you are allowing this behavior. Despite the fact that you broke up with him and are hours away from him, for some reason you still allow him to tell you what to do and still expend energy to satisfy his jealous needy ... (read in full...)

Are people that take risks better off than those who play it safe?

Q.   Everybody is against him (Save for friends who support me), yet i love him by everybody i mean my family they dont like him because he has a baby mama However we love each other. its depressing sometimes.. i have been telling them that its just...

A.   11 March 2013: You just have to do what makes you happy and hope for the best. If he is the one you want to be with, you are an adult now and should be with him. Someone having a kid isn't necessarily a deal breaker.... (read in full...)

I followed my husband and caught him at a brothel. He says he wanted to be caught??

Q.   We have had huge financial issues, loss of business, things really stressful. all this definitely took a toll on our lives. Today I did something either brave or some would say stupid. When our business was going down there were allig...

A.   11 March 2013: I know you have been together 25 years and it seems like it would be impossible to leave now, but 5 years is inexcusable. This isn't a one time slip up or something, this is five years. And worse, he's not "just" having sex. It's not an ego boost or ... (read in full...)

At work this guy won't leave me alone and they won't fire him because he's a good chef!

Q.   So there's this guy that won't leave me alone. I work part time at a Greek restaurant and he is the chef. He watches me when I'm dancing which makes me feel uncomfortable then after he always tries to talk to me after my dances where my boyfriend ...

A.   10 March 2013: That's sexual assault to kiss women against their will, you can always take legal action.... (read in full...)

Wanting to try a tampon for the first time.

Q.   I'm going to the spring fling tomorrow and I'm on my period. I've never worn a tampon before but I feel like it would be a good idea to wear one instead of a pad. should I wear a tampon even though I'venever worn one before? I just want to do the ...

A.   9 March 2013: Sure give it a try! Get normal absorbency with a nice plastic applicator (they're more expensive but easier to use for your first time) and practice a few times (like starting ASAP) to make sure you have it down before your spring fling.... (read in full...)

Can I trust my Bf? He goes onto online dating sites daily.

Q.   I met my boyfriend online, and neither of us closed the online accounts after we "got together". For my part, I hadn't entered very often at all... Just to try and make myself feel better or show him how i feel when he continued to log on almost d...

A.   8 March 2013: No you can't trust a guy who continues to log into dating sites and chat with potential mates while he is in a relationship. Unfortunately there's really nothing you can do at this point. I think some people become dependent on the ego boost from ... (read in full...)

I don't want to have sex anymore or be touched by my boyfriend! How do I tell him?

Q.   I'm stuck on how to tell my boyfriend I want to stop having sex for good. The thing is.. he grosses me out so much. And, I've also recently finally realized (through therapy) I have never enjoyed sex. I am very uncomfortable, I think about other th...

A.   8 March 2013: Have you ever attempted to get treatment for your sexual phobia? Most phobias can be helped with exposure therapy and this one isn't THAT rare. I think you should seek an anxiety/phobia specialist to discuss your options.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend called me a hypocrite for watching porn

Q.   So I'm a horn dog. I like sex and enjoy masturbation. My boyfriend is the opposite from me. He enjoys pleasure however does not want to do it often. I tell him I don't want him watching porn, However I watched it yesterday night and he caught me. He ...

A.   6 March 2013: Did you look up what the word hypocrite means? You ARE a hypocrite. You told him you don't want him watching porn because it makes you insecure, meanwhile you are doing it behind his back! Either you can both watch or neither can. You can't demand ... (read in full...)

IS this modeling agency on the up and up? They asked me do do some rather risque things?

Q.   hi, im really stuck! i need help. i have been contacted by a modeling agency asking if im interested in modeling. i am and i always have been i would love to be a model. The only thing is she told me i had to do my audition on skype on a web cam in ...

A.   5 March 2013: If a modeling agency contacted you they are 100% and without question a SCAM. There is the OCCASIONAL rare situation where someone will be scouted on the street, but what is happening to you is a scam. 100% scam scam scam.... (read in full...)

Would you marry a guy who never went to college?

Q.   Currently less than 40% of men will graduate from college, that's 140 women with college degrees for ever 100 men with a degree. at best its expected to get worse, on top of that jobs traditionally held predominantly by men are evaporating at an ...

A.   5 March 2013: Men aren't being rejected from colleges for being male and the imbalance is hardly an "epidemic." Male enrollment in college has RISEN, not declined. Male enrollment has simply not risen as quickly as female enrollment. More men are going to college ... (read in full...)

Why does my boyfriend need a male sex partner?

Q.   Okay, you think I am crazy? My instinct is telling me that my boyfriend I am with for 7 month has a guy sex partner. The only proof I have is txt messages: "I really I like to see you this week"... "8 am tomorrow morning?" "K, your place or my ...

A.   4 March 2013: "So what this guy can do that I can't??" Have a penis. Your boyfriend is gay and cheating on you. There is zero hope for your relationship continuing, time to end it.... (read in full...)

Husband is in love with younger woman but want's to work on us.

Q.   Help! My husband (22 years together, married for 18) recently confessed he had been having an affair for 18 months with a younger mutual friend. He says he thinks he had been suffering from depression for 2-3 years as he was unhappy with our...

A.   4 March 2013: I know that after being together so long it can seem impossible to think about divorce, but this man is being horribly selfish. Your marriage is already over. After 18 months of an affair, there is pretty never any reason a cheater should be forgi... (read in full...)

My fiance masturbates every morning and I just found out. What should I do?

Q.   we don't have sex alot, and i would like to but he always says no. but this morning i walked in on him masturbating and saw he does it every morning. He says he loves it when we have sex, but yet he still does this every morning... im really hurt ...

A.   4 March 2013: I disagree strongly that it's harmless. He's habitual about it to the detriment of his sex life. I think you need to talk about it because masturbating instead of having sex is not healthy.... (read in full...)

What can I do about my fiance who continues to lie to me? Money is tight yet he still spends on things we can't afford.

Q.   my fiance keeps lying about stupid things and its driving me up the wall. He's not working at the moment so money is tight, I have spoken to him about how much he keeps spending several times now. He has two kids from a previous relationshi...

A.   25 February 2013: It's time for some tough love then. Stop supporting his spending. If he has a credit card that he keeps racking up a bill on, stop paying for it. He can pay that off. You should get separate bank accounts and his money can only go towards household ... (read in full...)

Is my hot young fitness instructor attracted to me?

Q.   Hello Cupids. I am a single girl and I have been going to exercise class for a few months at my gym. The instructor is a hot young guy around my age. He is single, too. I have gotten to know him a little during this time but we have kept things...

A.   25 February 2013: We can't really decipher subtleties of eye contact over the internet. The only way to know is to go over and talk to him. Invite him out for coffee or something. If he did like you he probably wouldn't be able to approach you because he is your ... (read in full...)

How can I find a cute nickname for my boyfriend?

Q.   I've got a problem. My friend has an adorable nickname for her boyfriend and it isn't girly or anything (It's darebear) and he loves it. I'm having trouble thinking of one for my bf because he has the most god awful name (Rudolfo...but he goes by ...

A.   22 February 2013: You can't just think up a nickname for someone, nicknames kind of happen if they will. Also what you are thinking of is a pet name, different from a nickname. Rudy is his nickname. You don't need a pet name, they always sound forced and weird to me. ... (read in full...)

Girlfriend on site to cheat with married man. Is it time to end things?

Q.   I have found out my girlfriend of 2 years went onto a site that is designed for married people to cheat on each other. Her friend told me. I am surprised she told her anyway. She wrote that she is single and looking for an uncomplicated no strings ...

A.   22 February 2013: Yes it's time to end things.... (read in full...)

Is it really true? Once a cheater always a cheater?

Q.   Can people be truly sorry for cheating and never go on to do it again? Or is it a case of once a cheater always a cheater? I've cheated in the past knew it was wrong and never done it again. My boyfriend of four years cheated in the b...

A.   22 February 2013: I do agree with that saying, but "cheater" in my mind means someone who does it more than once. Like someone who has a one time indiscretion and feels awful, I don't think that means they will necessarily do it again. Someone who repeatedly cheats, ... (read in full...)

My first partner didn't enjoy the sex -- how can I compete with experienced guys?

Q.   I've been a relationship with a woman I met online for more than a year. We live thousands of miles apart but we've had two visits. The first visit, we weren't sure where we were going with our relationship, but we ended up having sex the first day ...

A.   22 February 2013: The guy who was the best in bed for me was a virgin when we'd met who barely even kissed anymore else precisely BECAUSE he was a virgin. Other guys would brag about their skills and talk about how good they were with previous girlfriends, and their ... (read in full...)

I hurt my ex girlfriend when I finished the relationship. I know she's hurting. How can I help her?

Q.   I had a 3 month relationship with this girl and we fell in love really quickly. We had some trust issues and I ended up breaking her heart. Since then she has been avoiding and ignoring me. The thing is, she is still emotionally dependent on me ...

A.   20 February 2013: You broke her heart, leave her alone! You are tormenting her every time you contact her! She is doing exactly the right things, cutting you out of her life and refusing to show you any emotional connection. There is nothing you can do to make this ... (read in full...)

Reasons why guys could have no/ lose their sex drive?

Q.   So I'm with this guy who just doesn't want sex often at all. Almost like we switched stereotypes. I'm the one usually pursuing it, and it takes several days before he considers it. I'm not complaining, it's probably better that I have someone keep ...

A.   20 February 2013: "Before we met he did tell me he was into pornography. Could this maybe effect how he reacts to actually having a real person around?" That would be my first guess, even without you saying that info. On what planet is 30 "old?" 30 is not old enou... (read in full...)

Husband's phone has a name as "buddy" who turns out is a girl! Should I be worried?

Q.   So the other day while my husband was in the shower, he asked me to find a number in his cell phone (a friend of his that we were meeting later) and call him to confirm the time. When I was doing that, his recent call history showed up, and I ...

A.   19 February 2013: Could be his daughter, couples in their 50's often have children. I think you are in the clear.... (read in full...)

I'm really trying to save myself for marriage and dating a non-virgin really bothers me

Q.   I recently got into a relationship with a guy I really like. We have terrible communication and it makes me angry. He always apologizes for that lack of good communication in our relationship. The thing is, we actually started talking alright the ...

A.   19 February 2013: If him being a non-virgin is something you can't cope with or that will bother you, you need to find someone within your religion who shares your view points. If you can't talk to your boyfriend about what's bothering you, it's not much of a ... (read in full...)

Continuous bleeding for 1 month after taking emergency contraceptive pill.. NORMAL?

Q.   I had protected sex with my partner in the 2nd week of jan. Within 12 hours i took an emergency contraceptive pill. within 1 week after this i started getting slight vaginal bleeding from around 14 or 15 of jan.On 26 jan we again had unprotected sex ...

A.   19 February 2013: You really need to ask a doctor, that doesn't sound normal.... (read in full...)

Husband's phone has a name as "buddy" who turns out is a girl! Should I be worried?

Q.   So the other day while my husband was in the shower, he asked me to find a number in his cell phone (a friend of his that we were meeting later) and call him to confirm the time. When I was doing that, his recent call history showed up, and I ...

A.   19 February 2013: One other option to throw out there is that it actually is a friend of his and his wife answered. Though I would be a bit concerned and I would definitely ask him about it. Don't say you called her, just ask who "buddy is" and see what he says.... (read in full...)

Husband can't preform because of pornography!

Q.   Frustrated at most, I've been married for 22 yrs and I'm still young early 40s ,however have hit a rough patch in my marriage which entails my husband can't preform the sexually act because he is busy watching porn ... We do have opposite schedules ...

A.   18 February 2013: I'm really surprised no one has linked to this site yet, but you should take a look: http://www.yourbrainonporn.com... (read in full...)

I don't want kids!

Q.   I'm a 23 year old male with a 23 year old girlfriend. We have been together since we were 17ish, had 1 or 2 breaks, but now were serious and committed. I live with her mum dad and sis, and have done for a couple of years now. We are happy and ha...

A.   17 February 2013: There IS no other advice. You are both in denial here. You think she will change her mind, she thinks you will change your mind but I don't see that happening. If you are certain it's not a matter of "telling her" it's a matter of breaking up.... (read in full...)

I gave money to my boyfriend to pay bills but he got a stupid video game!

Q.   Hey guys im haveing money issues with my bf and im 17 and need advice. background info is im 17 turn 18 next month my boyfriend is 20. He had a rough life growing up parents on heavey drugs ended up in foster care for awhile. Hes been my bestfriend ...

A.   17 February 2013: You need to stop helping him. You aren't helping, you are enabling. He isn't even asking for money but you continue to bail him out. He has no incentive to be responsible with money because all he has to do is look a little pathetic and you come ... (read in full...)

What makes for a successful relationship?

Q.   What are the attributes you look in a relationship that it will work. What make relationships successful and what things to look as traits that make it worthy and long lasting?? I am hurt and being cheated upon so I need help to find the ri...

A.   16 February 2013: There are so many factors that aren't tangible. My current partner is someone I plan to spend my life with so I will try to put down why: -trustworthy (so important) -reliable and dependable -amazing chemistry -strong attraction both phys... (read in full...)

No matter what he does I can't have orgasm from my boyfriend

Q.   Why can't i orgasm during sex or when he licks me out or fingers me? When i'm on my own i can orgasm easily with clitoral stimulation from the pulsations in my shower head, but when it comes to my boyfriend, sex doesn't even feel that good, he is ...

A.   16 February 2013: Why don't you try getting a vibrator for the two of you to use together?... (read in full...)

My gf forgot valentines day, should I break up?

Q.   its valentines day. long story short. im in a ldr with a girl because of her school but we see each other often. im affectionate, romantic, gentleman kind of guy and she is not much affectionate, she never let her guard down, she is cold as a snow ...

A.   15 February 2013: It doesn't sound like she cares about you the same way you care about her, at all. Not the Valentine's day thing so much, it sounds like everything.... (read in full...)

Is it bad to want to be alone ALL the time?

Q.   I have always been very shy and quiet and only had a small handful of friends (2-3). I don't like being friends with someone I cannot be really close with. I feel those relationships are just a total waste of time and completely fake. It takes me ...

A.   15 February 2013: You should go be checked by a psychiatrist/psychologist if you may have some kind of autism, the loud noises thing is especially a clue to that. It's OK to want alone time, but it's not normal to completely isolate yourself from everyone you know.... (read in full...)

Do women date guys they have only met once or twice?

Q.   Is it reasonable to date women if you have only met them once or twice? I ask this because I'm tired of "hanging out" in mixed sex groups and making friends with women instead of pursuing a relationship. I find this form of courtship useles...

A.   15 February 2013: I've been asked out by complete strangers in places like train stations, airplanes, grocery stores, etc... and as long as we've talked for at least a little while (so I can make sure they aren't completely nuts) I've usually said yes.... (read in full...)

Should we have oral sex if I have a cold?

Q.   This seems silly to ask but curious minds want to know. I have a bad cold right now, but my boyfriend and I will probably please each other at some point soon before I am better. Will me giving him head give issues to his dick? Funny I know......

A.   15 February 2013: No it won't cause issues, those viruses can't transfer that way. Cold viruses aren't in saliva anyways, just mucus. But why would you want to give a blowjob when you have a cold? How will you breathe...?... (read in full...)

Should girls make the first move?

Q.   curious as about today society. How do guys feel, when the girls make first move? if yes then how a - eye flirtations maybe or wink b- flat approach you with a 'hi' if not how are let know to make a move on us? ...

A.   14 February 2013: I am not a guy, but I made the first move and asked out my boyfriend, he said yes and we're still together. I will say I think winking looks weird on just about everyone, so I wouldn't go that approach. But yes it's completely OK to make the firs... (read in full...)

Should I be upset that he wants to go out for our Valentines dinner at the weekend?

Q.   my boyfriend and i have been together for about 6 months. Now its valentines day..i know he is trying to save money for a house and i am not materialistic in the sense where i expect us to go out to dinners all the time..i even contribute towar...

A.   14 February 2013: I think it's OK to be a little disappointed, but I don't think it's worth making a deal over. It's kind of a silly holiday anyways... My boyfriend and I are waiting for the weekend to "celebrate" because we have work tomorrow and we've both totally ... (read in full...)

Crush on a girl I saw on Facebook. We have mutual friends. How can I get her attention?

Q.   hi there everyone, well it all started when i and my best friend were joking around a week ago together while on phone. so i said to him that i would check his facebook friends to piss him off ( i don't know how this would piss him off but we were ...

A.   13 February 2013: The only way you have a shot is to have one of your mutual friends introduce you. Otherwise she will probably think it's very creepy for you to ask her out.... (read in full...)

My friend went out with him and said he was horrible. But then she asked if I'd like his number. Should I be insulted?

Q.   My friend was hooked up with this guy and went on a date with him and it was horrible according to her. I sat and listened for hours as she told me everything horrible about it. At the end of this she asked if i would like to have his number b...

A.   12 February 2013: Are you sure she wasn't kidding?... (read in full...)

Are there men who voluntarily don't look at pornography?

Q.   Is there any women here whose boyfriend/husband doesn't look at porn? If they don't do you know for sure? Where did you find them? Did you have to tell them to stop? Are there any men here who don't use it in a relationship? If they d...

A.   12 February 2013: My bf doesn't. He was the one who suggested neither of us do it at the beginning of our relationship. He watched a bit in high school, but he's not that visual a person to begin with and he didn't like the way it felt. So he never got in the habit.... (read in full...)

Will my wife get mad if I put up some erotica pictures in my office?

Q.   I'm a big fan of vintage erotica and while my wife appreciates the beauty of photographs, I don't know if she is as big a fan as I am. Anyway, I just purchased a bunch of old photographs from Penthouse magazine creator Bob Guccione's colle...

A.   12 February 2013: We don't know how your wife will react either. Is there some reason you don't want to ask her? ... (read in full...)

I don't want kids!

Q.   I'm a 23 year old male with a 23 year old girlfriend. We have been together since we were 17ish, had 1 or 2 breaks, but now were serious and committed. I live with her mum dad and sis, and have done for a couple of years now. We are happy and ha...

A.   9 February 2013: If you don't want kids and she does, that is a dealbreaker. One of you will always feel unhappy in the relationship and it just can't work.... (read in full...)

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