Married to a distant, abusive man and I'm desperate to be touched and loved and I'm wondering about how it would be with this man!
Q. Confused! I am 33 years old, been with my husband for 12 years- married for 5 years-no children. Our marriage is not good-we have not had sex for almost a year and before that is was twice a years-continually got less and less throughout the y...
A. 4 May 2012: Maybe instead of wondering what it would be like to be with this man, you should ponder why you're still with your husband. If your husband is as cold, abusive, emotionally detached and sexually distant as you say, then why are you with him? If ... (read in full...)
What should I think about this comment by my wife?
Q. So, during a conversation with my wife, she said to me that she has times when she doesn't want to love me, she wants to hate me, and does. That actually hurt me a little, but then she became really uptight when i told her i was hurt by her comment,...
A. 4 May 2012: This is a very vague question. What kind of a conversation did you two have that she brought this up? Have you done anything to her that has caused her to wan to hate you? And better yet, have you asked WHY she would say something like that?... (read in full...)
I cannot comprehend how my ex husband could start dating so soon after our divorce
Q. My ex and I divorced but still lived together. We loved each other but i divorced him because of finance differences. I left him and after a few weeks broke all contact because he is bi polar and has sociopathic tendencies. During that time onc...
A. 4 May 2012: No, you're not wrong for feeling and thinking the way that you do. Maybe you ought to focus on "i divorced him because of finance differences. I left him .... broke all contact because he is bi polar and has sociopathic tendencies." If you broke up ... (read in full...)
How can I get my boyfriend to be more physically dominant without having to say anything?
Q. Hey, I am wondering if anyone can help me figure myself out. I have fantasies of being dominated - specifically a man grabbing my arms or wrists, pinning me up against the wall, or cornering me. I have had an ex that did that a little but i hat...
A. 29 April 2012: "I can't bring myself to tell him about these fantasies because I'm scared of what he'll think about them. how can i get him to be more physically dominant without having to say anything?"
First off, know that your fears are unwarranted. I have y... (read in full...)
My ex wants to come clean about why he cheated on me,should I talk to him or let it go?
Q. my ex and I had a 4 year relationship that ended because he cheated on me. I cut off all communication after we broke up until he posted a long status on Facebook about our relationship, and how he made mistakes and his mistakes shouldn't be coun...
A. 29 April 2012: "...he posted a long status on Facebook about our relationship, and how he made mistakes and his mistakes shouldn't be counted against him." If he feels that he should not be held accountable for his actions, why would you want to listen to anythi... (read in full...)
I'm engaged. But should I act on my powerful crush I have with my co-worker?
Q. I have been working with this married woman for about two years. I'm engaged. There was an instant attraction. She is this sexy hipster with a really cute face and a hot body. We started texting and the texts became heated. We decided to pull bac...
A. 29 April 2012: Is this just sexual attraction, or do you have an emotional bond with this co-worker as well? Judging by what you have written, it's all related to sex. Do you want to sleep with her just once, or are you planing to lead a double life and turn this ... (read in full...)
Why is it that people seem to practice safe penetrative sex on porn sites, but not safe oral sex?
Q. Me and my pals were in the pub the other day and the subject of safe sex came up(we r all married and well into our forties and apparently std's are on the rise for age group). Why is it that on many porn sites,swinging sites people seem to practice ...
A. 28 April 2012: Honestly, I think it all boils down to ignorance. Most sex education classes don't really teach about oral, they just focus on the "traditional" sex. Oral seems to be a taboo topic in the educational system as well as with the parents. Again, how ... (read in full...)
I'm filthy rich and very independant and it seems that most guys are intimidated by the fact that they have nothing to offer me
Q. I'm in my early thirties, I've never been in a serious relationship and once I get to know someone it never develops into anything and it's generally over within a month. I'm pretty but I don't dress to show my assets, don't sleep with guys for the ...
A. 28 April 2012: "'m pretty but I don't dress to show my assets"
Men are visual. Choose clothing that flatter your body type and put a little more umpf in it. Wear something tighter, or accentuate one of your assets. Most men don't want to pursue someone that loo... (read in full...)
32 year old woman/19 year old man
Q. I feel like a damn fool. I'm an attractive, intelligent woman and over the course of the last year or so, I have found myself growing more attracted (emotionally, physically and mentally) to a beautiful, extremely mature 19 year old man. Sometimes I ...
A. 28 April 2012: I have yet to meet a "mature" 19 year old male. There are definitely more serious, more intellectual, more pretentious and arrogant 19 year olds, but MATURE? The same applies to 19 year old females. 19 is just that- 19.
It takes men so much long... (read in full...)
I saw a future with this guy but after our argument I feel abused and demoralised!
Q. I guess I already know the answer to my question, but need a little kick in the arse to make a move. I am mid 40's...so is my boyfriend. We've been together for more than a year. The relationship has been really great. Or HAD been until a huge ...
A. 26 April 2012: That type of a blow-out over opening doors and not checking his phone? REALLY? That's basic manners, not some extravagant, difficult requests. In fact, it's COMMON CURTSEY. If he is going to blow up and go crazy over minor things like those, can you ... (read in full...)
Do priorities come into play when there's a large age gap?
Q. I'm wondering if age in dating makes a big difference. Recently I met this guy and hes a bit older than me. I just turned 21 and hes 34. We hit it off pretty well and we have the same views on a lot of things. I'm just wondering if it'd be a problem ...
A. 26 April 2012: A bit older is a few years. This man is 13 years older than you - hardly anything little there. Honestly, I don't see what a 21 and 34 year old could possibly have in common in terms of life experience. I don't mean that statement in a r... (read in full...)
I've fallen in love with my friends with benefits guy!
Q. hi everyone I could really use some opinions I was just wondering what you think this means I have been in a fwb for a while now he comes to mine I go to his for a coffee or a movie or something he somtimes just wants to cuddle me and kiss me I have ...
A. 26 April 2012: "I am not sure whether to tell him as I am scared how he would react he has been very badly hurt in the past" First off, let me preface this by saying that the whole "hurt before" is a cop out. Who hasn't been hurt in their past relationships? ... (read in full...)
How do I handle the fears of my girlfriend that I will get hurt climbing to the summit? It is my dream to do this climb
Q. Ok, so next year, I am scheduled to climb to the summit of Mt Everest, the worlds tallest mountain. This has been my dream ever since I was a little boy. I am taking up a particular route to the summit. Yesterday I was watching a video of an area ...
A. 25 April 2012: The concept of fulfilling one's dreams is fine and dandy, but I am going to be realistic here. My first question is: are you an exceptionally experienced mt. climber, or are you going from a 6 to an 11? Are you going alone or in a group? If you're ... (read in full...)
A beautiful girl cares about me but I am not ready for a relationship
Q. Hello. How do I say goodbye to a BEAUTIFUL girl? She has everything going for her but I am not ready for relationship with her. I want a no strings relationship and I am getting that with this other girl right now. My friend told me she is hurt t...
A. 25 April 2012: Are you truly confused by what you want? You did after all say the following: "She has everything going for her but I am not ready for relationship with her. I want a no strings relationship and I am getting that with this other girl right now." ... (read in full...)
If he's not interested then why did he text me?
Q. So im an 18year old, and haven't been in any relationships. Not a single bf, not cause im not a attractive, but im waiting for that challenging guy that blows off my mind. Two weeks a go 3 weeks ago i went to this library with my friend and saw this ...
A. 22 April 2012: He is not interested in dating you nor is he interested in you in general. He is responding in order to be nice. The majority of people will be friendly to someone who has confessed an interest in them because they are flattered, but they don't want ... (read in full...)
My 19 year old sister is planning on having sex with a 51 year old man she met on the internet!
Q. Ok I will just admit it....I found my sister's email acct password and I snooped. So looking through everything I find all these messsages from a man she met online...theres a ton of them, it starts out with them basically getting to know each ...
A. 22 April 2012: You need to tell your mother. Hopefully she can put an end to it. A 51 year old man that goes after 19 year old is a sad pervert and possibly a rapist or creep. Once your mother speaks to her, it would be a good idea for you to talk to her as well. ... (read in full...)
I'm having a major hang up around my boyfriend's close friend who is a girl.
Q. I'm having a major hang up around my boyfriend's close friend who is a girl. My bf has many girls as friends and I don't have any issues with any one of them except this one. I think it's important to understand their past to answer this question. ...
A. 21 April 2012: No, you're not being irrational. Your emotional reaction to their relationship is spot on. There is nothing normal or appropriate about their relationship. ... (read in full...)
Worried that a future partner won't be as financially stable as my ex
Q. Hi All. Okay me and my long distant boyfriend of 9 months have just recently split up. The relationship was like a rollercoaster from day one, he would ignore me for days, accuse me of being with other people, act secretive i.e his phone, we split ...
A. 19 April 2012: First of all, what makes you think you will never date a successful man again? I think you're being very dramatic and fatalistic over the " never again" part. There is a real possibility that you may end up with another wealthy man. It may happen or ... (read in full...)
Am I "bi-curious" or is this just "normal" behavior?
Q. I'm 17 years old, and I have never been in a relationship, romantic or sexual, with any man or woman. I've had serious crushes on men before (one lasted for over two years), but have never had any feelings towards any women at all. I am most ...
A. 18 April 2012: "I like looking at women, but never in a sexual way. "
Welcome to the rest of the female population. All women check out other women. It's completely normal and natural. If you don't feel anything sexual towards women, you are not bisexual or bi-c... (read in full...)
She called of our wedding but claims to still love me, what should I do?
Q. My fiancé called off our wedding a couple of weeks ago (at the time it was about 1.5 months till the wedding). She said that she just had a gnawing feeling that would not go away, she was nervous to get married and not sure if she was ready. ...
A. 18 April 2012: First off, how long have you been together and how old is she? This is an important factor in answering your question.
"She says she desperately wants me to be the "one" and has prayed for months that her nervous feelings would go away."
... (read in full...)
How will I know when its time to walk away because b/f and I may not want the same things in life?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 9 months and overall our relationship has been amazing, he's 29 and I'm 23. We're basically living together, he has his own place and works 60 hours a week. I love that he is so responsible. I am currently ...
A. 12 April 2012: Yes 9 months is very early. At the same time, you need to actually listen to his answers, and pay less attention to the things he says randomly. When you two talk about it marriage/kids and when you ask questions on that topic, you're receiving his ... (read in full...)
The girl I like is living with her ex who is a friend of mine!
Q. Hi, I've been seeing this girl off and on for about 5 months. We were really intense when we first met - still are in a way. Recently we met up and she told me that she was in a open relationship with her ex last time we met she told me she didn't ...
A. 12 April 2012: 1. "....off and on for about 5 months. We were really intense when we first met " 5 months and you're already on the on and off? It's a classic case of too much too soon. The chances of bouncing back from those type of situations are slim. 2. ... (read in full...)
I'm 25 and I like talking to girls in their late teens. Is this a bad thing?
Q. Hi I'm currently 25 and I still like talking to young girls in their late teens. My parents say that it's illegal to date girls 17 or under. I don't understand why it would be so bad. Sex is a different issue, but I'm talking about just being close ...
A. 10 April 2012: I am 27. Wen I was 25 I was not interested in talking to teenagers because we did not have any common ground. No one that I knew wanted to hang around teens either. If you're 25 and you like to talk to teenagers, you're either:
1. Mentally... (read in full...)
Girlfriend has low self esteem and doesn't believe me when I say she's beautiful
Q. How can I boost my girlfriend's self confidence? We have been together for three years and over time she has gained some weight. She is still as beautiful as ever but she is really down about the weight. I keep telling her she is perfect but she ...
A. 10 April 2012: SHE doesn't think she is sexy because of her weight. Until she reaches her target goal, she will not feel differently. Instead of giving her compliments, you should work on a plan to get her to loose weight. Offer to go work out with her, help her ... (read in full...)
I don't know if we're ready for a child! Should I ask my wife to get an abortion?
Q. Hello. I am 25 years old and I'm graduating from college with my bachelor's degree in three weeks. I've been married for two years and my wife is 21 going on 22 in september. Here is my dilemma. My wife has one more semester to go after the end of ...
A. 10 April 2012: Does she want an abortion is the better question. If she has not brought up the topic of abortion and she is not considering it as an option, DO NOT mention it to her. This is one of those times in life when you need to be a man and suck it up. Do ... (read in full...)
He doesn't believe in living together before marriage
Q. I have been in a relationship for a year now. Things are pretty great between us and I am considering living together but he seems to disagree. Both of us currently work part time and live at home, whilst saving up for a deposit. However, usually ...
A. 10 April 2012: No one is right or wrong. This is about preference and choices in life. You two just happen to have different opinions on the topic. I certainly can understand the pros and cons for both arguments. It simply depends on who has the stronger ... (read in full...)
I really love him and want to be with him but I haven't been able to ignore that online situation that he has going on, which I've tried so far.
Q. I have to make a final decision and was wondering if I can get some opinions/advice here. My boyfriend and I have been together for 1 year 5 months. Well, I recently (December) found out that he's been having an online relationship wit...
A. 8 April 2012: Red flag #1: "He said, "decide what you want to do, because I'm tired of you weeping around, being depressed and angry at me." He has issued an ultimatum. He is telling you you to either get over it, OR to break up. You'd think after carrying on ... (read in full...)
He's 29 and has NEVER had a girlfriend.. Red Flag??
Q. I'm really unsure about this guy i'm dating. We've been talking for 1 month, only met once (he isn't local to me) but he seems good for me - personality wise and there's an attraction there. The attraction isn't fireworks in my tummy attraction ...
A. 7 April 2012: Do you get a creep vibe? Do you have a hunch that he may be disturbed? If yes, then yes, it would be a red flag. Does he suck at talking to women, i.e. he has no game? If he has no game, or no personality, then yes, it wouldn't be a surprise that he ... (read in full...)
I'm still very much in love with my ex who still feels for me but he isn't doing anything about it
Q. I'm struggling to work out what to do with this guy. We were together a few years ago for over a year and I've not been able to get over him since we split up. Around Christmas time he told me he still had feelings for me and no longer felt for the ...
A. 5 April 2012: He is showing all the signs of being disinterested.
1. He dumped you for another woman
2. He tells you he misses you AFTER he breaks up with a woman
3. He is not visiting you
In short: he is just not that into you....if at all. You need to loo... (read in full...)
Do I tell the guy I'm dating that I did a background check on him?
Q. So, I have been seeing this guy (43 years old) for 2 weeks now, and decided that things have been getting more serious and I should do a background check on him. I do that to anyone I start dating because I have children I need to think about. Don't ...
A. 5 April 2012: If you don't want to get "too deep" before knowing, then yes, you should bring it up. If you don't want to waste time and get to the bottom of his criminal background, why not bring it up? You've already seen his background info. Your judgement is ... (read in full...)
Would you spent a lot on a birthday gift for your partner if you received nothing for yours?
Q. Im curious to find out others opinions on this. Would you spent a considerable amount of money (over $400) on a birthday present for your boyfriend, if he did not get you anything for your birthday? (birthdays are few months apart). I know it isn't...
A. 30 March 2012: Your boyfriend has no shame and no character.
1. He didn't get you anything for your birthday.
2. He is demanding a $400 dollar gift from you knowing you cannot afford it.
This isn't about money. This is about his lack of consideratio... (read in full...)
I cant orgasm when being fingered, is this normal? question to lesbians or girlies!
Q. This is a question for the girlies! More so lesbian girls/women...........when me and my ex girlfriend where having sex I never seemed to be able to orgasm when she fingered me. Is this like this for other women too? And how can I overcome this as I ...
A. 29 March 2012: Neither can I. There is nothing wrong with you.... (read in full...)
Unexpected possible pregnancy, boyfriend doesn't want the child, I don't want to lose either!
Q. hi im a 22 year old lady with a 21 year old boyfriend, we had sex and the condom broke so we think i might be pregnant, this will be my first child and im looking foward to having it but he is telling me that he is not ready! What do i do because I ...
A. 29 March 2012: If you are indeed pregnant, make a list of why you would have an abortion. If your boyfriend's disinterest in having a child and wanting to pacify him is the only and primary reason to have an abortion, then don't do it. If you get an abortion, will ... (read in full...)
I cheated because fiance ignored me now he's being all sweet
Q. HI so my problem orginally started out simple, my fiance of a handful of years didnt pay any attention to me, lacked any interest in me, didnt want to do anything with me and wanted to drink everyday he had off. I pretty much feel like it was my ...
A. 28 March 2012: Have you ever had an actual discussion with your fiance prior to your cheating? Have you ever told him what you that you felt neglected and what you need to see him improving in?
In either case, you have cheated on him. I don't care if you're a woma... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is videotaping other girls at the beach
Q. Hi, I went on a vacation with my boyfriend to an all inclusive resort he brought a video camera and I noticed he videotaped other girls at the beach... He was panning in on their breasts and butts and just videotaping girls. There were other video...
A. 28 March 2012: Congrats, you're dating an actual pervert. Only a small minority of men will actually tape random women in public. Those men are commonly known as creeps and pervs. If you want to date one, then continue being with this cretin.... (read in full...)
Can happiness cover up the truth?
Q. When your hubby is having an affair can you make it go away by letting everyone know that your happy and everything is perfect?...
A. 28 March 2012: No one will buy it. There is nothing more pathetic and transparent than a woman pretending to be happy, or pretending that that their husband/marriage is perfect. Maybe you can fool a 5 year old, but you won't fool any adults.
I have seen wome... (read in full...)
I want my revenge!
Q. I am going crazy because of his sexual past. I think its because it happened while we were broken up. I feel as though, if he hadn't messed up the way he did, none of it would have happened. We wouldn't have broken up and it wouldnt have happened. ...
A. 27 March 2012: No, it doesn't change my mind. I don't care about technicalities; I care about moral responsibility and respect. Clearly you do too, or you wouldn't be this upset. I have yet to meet a man or a woman, who does not feel betrayed and cheated on, when ... (read in full...)
Not quite sure how to present ourselves/our relationship to the world?
Q. my husband and i have been together for 9 years( married for 5).We are now having somewhat of an open relationship for the last year and so far everything is good. We have made out with other people a lot of times even in front of each other, went ...
A. 27 March 2012: "we don't want to be seen as husband and wife anymore but in a relationship status.We no longer believe in the concept of "marriage/monogamy"."
The fact is that you ARE married. If you no longer wish to be seen or associated as married people, ... (read in full...)
Am I just being a prude getting uncomfortable hubbie's new obsession?
Q. Hi! My husband and I have been married for 22 years and have a great sex life. Lately, he has been wanting to be in the same room as or have the possibility of having sex with another couple. He has been online searching and chatting with other ...
A. 27 March 2012: "I feel like I am just pretending at this point."
The better question is: WHY are you pretending to be OK with your husband wanting add more people to your sex life when you're clearly not interested? Do you want to pacify your husband's fantasie... (read in full...)
Dumped for a rich guy: was girl being shallow or practical?
Q. Yeah so a couple weeks ago this girl I was seeing for a few months. Really pretty girl, my friends even said he was hot. I'm an average guy, maybe a 6 on a scale of 1 to 10. I make a decent living but def not rich. Anyway, to make a long story short ...
A. 27 March 2012: Wealthy, or powerful men have a better advantage than the average Joe ....much like hot women have a greater advantage than the average looking females. They are just tools to advance in life and these are realities of life. You only dated this ... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to start showing other people we are together so they know not to mess with our relationship?
Q. Hello guys I need a mature advice of dealing with this situation. I am in a LDR. There seem to be a trust issue that I have gotten over after I did all my homework and realize that my man is not physically cheating. Hey I have friends too in my area ...
A. 27 March 2012: I don't think you're over-analyzing. I don't think any woman would be happy in your situation. You're dating a man, who needs attention from other women because he gets off on it. I can understand that to some extent. We all want to be reminded that ... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to start showing other people we are together so they know not to mess with our relationship?
Q. Hello guys I need a mature advice of dealing with this situation. I am in a LDR. There seem to be a trust issue that I have gotten over after I did all my homework and realize that my man is not physically cheating. Hey I have friends too in my area ...
A. 26 March 2012: I too don't "flaunt" or mention my relationship status to people that I don't know very well, or strangers. It is my private life and I don't think it's anyone's business to know. At the same time, my FB status says that I am engaged. Why? Because ... (read in full...)
I want my revenge!
Q. I am going crazy because of his sexual past. I think its because it happened while we were broken up. I feel as though, if he hadn't messed up the way he did, none of it would have happened. We wouldn't have broken up and it wouldnt have happened. ...
A. 25 March 2012: It has been a week, so you will naturally be still very upset. You have every right to be angry, but if you go through with your plan, it won't cause any pain to your husband. Think about this for a second...Why would he feel hurt or devastated if ... (read in full...)
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