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My boyfriend is the least popular in the class and I have to face nasty comments for dating him! What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend is the least popular kid in the class and everybody is like,"ur really going out with him?!" and I don't know what to do because it's really bugging me and I dont want to dump him. What should I do?...
A. 8 June 2008: Glad we could help!... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is the least popular in the class and I have to face nasty comments for dating him! What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend is the least popular kid in the class and everybody is like,"ur really going out with him?!" and I don't know what to do because it's really bugging me and I dont want to dump him. What should I do?...
A. 24 May 2008: Thanks for the update, and sorry to hear that things are still difficult.
First, let me say that when you're young you feel you've got to be like everyone else. It won't always be like this. People around you will gradually blossom and develop ... (read in full...)
All I want to know is if YOU would want to be with someone like this?
Q. Ok, I am going to summarize everything and all I want to know is if YOU would want to be with someone like this. My GF before she met me: Slept with 18 people, involved in group sex, cheated, had an abortion, stripped for coke, lots of one nigh...
A. 16 May 2008: Reading your reply, it seems to me you'd be better moving on from her.
The problem is partly in your head, the fact that you can't get over her past. But the signs she's showing are only feeding your feelings. It's pretty clear that she can't be... (read in full...)
Hurt, confused and broken....help.
Q. i got married last year. me and my husband had a fairytale relationship before we got married. now we have spells of really highs or really lows. I got raped at fifteen, and his beginning to bring it up alot recently. we go through periods where we ...
A. 15 May 2008: The "ignore behaviour that you can't accept" approach might even work. Without any feedback to send him ballistic, he might actually calm down a bit.
Hope it all goes OK for the both of you. He sounds like he's been through a lot and you should b... (read in full...)
My wife cheated. Now she writes stories and poems about other men.
Q. My wife cheated on me while we were dating. I forgaveand forgot and we got married two years later. After we were married about 3 years she did it again with someone else (about a year ago). She came forward and appologised and asked for one last ...
A. 15 May 2008: Anonymous, one thing I don't understand is how you found these poems and stories. Did your wife give them to you voluntarily? Did you find them stowed away in a secret place? Did she publish them and a friend brought them to your attention? What is ... (read in full...)
Hurt, confused and broken....help.
Q. i got married last year. me and my husband had a fairytale relationship before we got married. now we have spells of really highs or really lows. I got raped at fifteen, and his beginning to bring it up alot recently. we go through periods where we ...
A. 15 May 2008: I can only guess what's going through his brain, but irrational as it may seem, it sounds like your past is preying on his mind. As Anonymous said, he's insecure and immature. The rape at 15 and his suspicion about your having an affair are not ... (read in full...)
All I want to know is if YOU would want to be with someone like this?
Q. Ok, I am going to summarize everything and all I want to know is if YOU would want to be with someone like this. My GF before she met me: Slept with 18 people, involved in group sex, cheated, had an abortion, stripped for coke, lots of one nigh...
A. 15 May 2008: Anonymous, I think we've got two issues here:
1. The old "I can't forgive her for what she did in the past" thing. Do a search of Dear Cupid on "her past" or "her history" and you'll pull up screeds and screeds of threads of guys agonisin... (read in full...)
He's never cum with me at all, and we've been together for 6 months!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend now for a good sixth months and we've had sex and I've given him oral and hand jobs but he just doesn't cum at all. He's been close but it's never happened once. I feel like maybe I'm not doing the best I could...
A. 15 May 2008: Ask him to masturbate in front of you. Tell him you've always wanted to see a guy masturbate because it's such a total turn-on. And swoon when he comes.
The next time you give him a blowjob, tell him you want to see that stuff coming out again, e... (read in full...)
I know it is unfair for me but my heart has been ruling my head. What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I need your help. I believe you see clearer than me. It is a really long story. I have been here before. I once said I was and still am in love with this guy who twice my age and who is a divorced man with kids and an acoholic as well. ...
A. 15 May 2008: Anonymous, if he's moved to another Asian country it's quite possible that he's found a new girlfriend. And if he moves to another country again he'll find a new girlfriend again.
He knows how to tell stories to touch your heart (how he loved hi... (read in full...)
My wife cheated. Now she writes stories and poems about other men.
Q. My wife cheated on me while we were dating. I forgaveand forgot and we got married two years later. After we were married about 3 years she did it again with someone else (about a year ago). She came forward and appologised and asked for one last ...
A. 14 May 2008: OK, eyeswideopen, I understand your point!
I was merely trying to present the matter in a different light. I understand that anonymous is feeling extremely upset by these poems and stories. My point was that he could look at them from a complete... (read in full...)
My wife cheated. Now she writes stories and poems about other men.
Q. My wife cheated on me while we were dating. I forgaveand forgot and we got married two years later. After we were married about 3 years she did it again with someone else (about a year ago). She came forward and appologised and asked for one last ...
A. 14 May 2008: I don't know how good her poetry and stories are, but people who are driven to write use their own experience as raw material.
For her, these relationships may be valuable emotional raw material. It doesn't necessarily mean she loves the men, but... (read in full...)
I know it is unfair for me but my heart has been ruling my head. What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I need your help. I believe you see clearer than me. It is a really long story. I have been here before. I once said I was and still am in love with this guy who twice my age and who is a divorced man with kids and an acoholic as well. ...
A. 14 May 2008: I can understand how you feel about this. But there are a couple of things about your posts that need comment.
First, although you come from a traditional society that values chastity, I am sure you will find that there are many girls around y... (read in full...)
I'm feeling unbelievable lust for this man other than my husband. What are your thoughts on open marriage?
Q. Help! I am married to a wonderful man for 7 years now. We have 3 wonderful kids. I was out with my girlfriend and met this Brad Pitt look-alike from Brazil. He is so amazing in so many different ways. In the heat of the moment i shared with him a ...
A. 14 May 2008: Here's a blog by a woman in an open marriage.
http://confessionsfrommyopenmarriage.blogspot.com/
... (read in full...)
I know it is unfair for me but my heart has been ruling my head. What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I need your help. I believe you see clearer than me. It is a really long story. I have been here before. I once said I was and still am in love with this guy who twice my age and who is a divorced man with kids and an acoholic as well. ...
A. 13 May 2008: Rhythmandblues has expressed what I was saying but in much blunter terms. This guy is an arsehole. He liked it while it lasted, but he never intended for it to go any further and he doesn't want you to go to his country. That's all.
You gave him... (read in full...)
I know it is unfair for me but my heart has been ruling my head. What should I do?
Q. Hi everyone, I need your help. I believe you see clearer than me. It is a really long story. I have been here before. I once said I was and still am in love with this guy who twice my age and who is a divorced man with kids and an acoholic as well. ...
A. 13 May 2008: I can understand why you want to know why his feelings faded, but you won't necessarily like the answer. In fact, he's basically told you the reason:
* He knows you're too young for him, which is why your relationship is "not approved". Of cours... (read in full...)
What do most women feel bout men going to strip clubs?
Q. Ive been in a relationship for 6 years and am now living with him. Last year he went travelling for a month in Europe and by accident i found a diary from when he was away saying that he'd been to a strip club and had two lap dances. One with one ...
A. 13 May 2008: Try this, ladies:
http://thetyee.ca/Life/2006/01/06/NakedTruthStripping/
... (read in full...)
What do most women feel bout men going to strip clubs?
Q. Ive been in a relationship for 6 years and am now living with him. Last year he went travelling for a month in Europe and by accident i found a diary from when he was away saying that he'd been to a strip club and had two lap dances. One with one ...
A. 13 May 2008: I find it amazing how much hostility women feel towards strip clubs. Everyone posting a reply here is a woman, every single one is almost unremittingly hostile.
For men, going to a strip club is nothing so momentous. It may be something he does ... (read in full...)
His cum tastes awful, what can I do?
Q. Im sure many girls have this problem, but its really starting to bother me. I dont mind giving my boyfriend oral sex, but its the end that i literally CANNOT DO! the smell, the taste, just makes me wanna gag, ive asked friends and most of them say ...
A. 13 May 2008: It's hard to know what the problem is. My cum is usually mild and unexceptional, but after I had an operation it turned incredibly bitter for several months. Maybe it was the anaesthetic.
A change of diet may be a good idea. See what he says.... (read in full...)
Do we have double standards whenever a woman "cheats"?
Q. its funny that.....when men come on line asking for advice about cheating on their girlfriends, you never see many men being judgemental and condeming them. However, when you see a woman who betrays her husband, all the men are so quick to respond...
A. 13 May 2008: I agree with the question. I've noticed that when women admit to an affair many men posters express great hostility. And when men are unfaithful (or even just go to strip clubs), many women posters are extremely hostile.
I guess it's because ... (read in full...)
Is masturbation murder?
Q. well as u all know ''sperm'' is pretty mutch something alive ,i mean it turns into a human if u have sexual intercourse with a woman ,well if people masturbate is it a sin ,as my freind said it ''mastubation is murder'' then he followed on ...
A. 13 May 2008: Without an egg, a spermatozoon is nothing. And Nature certainly didn't intend for every single sperm to be united with an egg. If every sperm produced did its job and fertilised an egg, the earth would be grossly overpopulated in about a year.
... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a girl to like getting spanked?
Q. i like to be spanked during sex. whats wrong with me?...
A. 13 May 2008: I had a girlfriend like that. She liked to be slapped and pinched, and when I did it she would get very wet and lush. She was very hot! ... (read in full...)
If I lost her do to my shady sexual history, I'd be devastated! Should I reveal what I've done?
Q. I've recently started a relationship with the most amazing woman I've ever met. Things are better than I could have ever imagined and have ever been with anyone else and I'm certain we are both deeply in love with each other. The problem is that ...
A. 13 May 2008: Don't ever make the mistake of assuming that she's as pure as the fresh-fallen snow and you're a pile of compacted slush that someone pissed in last week. There is something terribly condescending about that kind of thinking. She's not an innocent ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling unbelievable lust for this man other than my husband. What are your thoughts on open marriage?
Q. Help! I am married to a wonderful man for 7 years now. We have 3 wonderful kids. I was out with my girlfriend and met this Brad Pitt look-alike from Brazil. He is so amazing in so many different ways. In the heat of the moment i shared with him a ...
A. 13 May 2008: I don't disagree with what people have said on here. They're all saying the right thing. But it would be interesting to hear from someone who has actually been in an open marriage or a similar situation to the one you're in now. Surely someone has ... (read in full...)
Masturbation. Can anybody confirm my fears, or is it all just a big lie?
Q. Hi. I'm a little concerned. People say that you can Masturbate as often as you want and it's not a problem. But I heard about a condition you can get if you do it too often. I forget the name of it, but all I know is I don't want to get it. Recently...
A. 13 May 2008: It's not a problem. There were a couple of times when I was younger and I overdid it. The skin around my penis got a bit swollen. Infection? I don't know. It was a bit sore but got better in a day or two.
Masturbation has never stopped me enjoying... (read in full...)
Unbearable truth....do I move on or wait for a cheater to reform?
Q. I am 38 and my ex gf is 23 going on 24. We had been together for over a year and a half. Chance meeting at a bar and I wasn't looking for someone this young. Firstly, she's geniunely naive, stupid and weak. I slept with her the first night. I had ...
A. 13 May 2008: If she's sincere, I think you can forgive this girl and all her transgressions of the past. All the 14 penises etc. is primitive male pride and possessiveness. It's hard to accept in a visceral sense, but I'm pretty sure you can get over it. It ... (read in full...)
True love never dies? She doesn't seem to want me now.
Q. Im 32 and up until I was 26 I had never had a serious relationship. As I am quite a shy person and really didnt want to get hurt. I have had self asteem issues and never really thought that any girl would notice me. When I was 26 this changed, when...
A. 12 May 2008: I understand your feelings of desperation. If it's any comfort, they're familiar feelings for many people.
From the sound of it, you sound as though you may be overly devoted to her. No matter how good she is, you should never turn your back on ... (read in full...)
Why do guys prefer girls shaved 'down there'?
Q. I have now shaved my vagina but one thing i still dont understand...why do boys prefer it shaved?...
A. 12 May 2008: Agree with Collaroy.
I love that bush down there! Of course, I've never had girls with massive overgrown pubic hair, but even so, that mat of hair lying on top of the pubic mound, telling you that something extremely desirable is lying undernea... (read in full...)
Why are westeners so prejudice, ignorant Bible lovers?
Q. I grew up in one of the biggest cities in North America. I’ve accepted baseball and McDonalds, but what I can't accept are there BS " morals ". Whenever it comes to love, sex or any other issue people turn to the book of lies, distortion and gene...
A. 12 May 2008: I believe what you wrote is technically known as a "rant".
Much of what you criticise has to do with social attitudes, not religion. Christians don't have to be prejudiced against Blacks or Asians. It's not part of their religion. The fact tha... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is the least popular in the class and I have to face nasty comments for dating him! What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend is the least popular kid in the class and everybody is like,"ur really going out with him?!" and I don't know what to do because it's really bugging me and I dont want to dump him. What should I do?...
A. 12 May 2008: To hell with the rest of the class!
You must see something in the guy that they can't. Have a bit of courage and stick to your choice. What would they know about him, anyway?
It's just a mob mentality. As you grow older, you'll find more and mo... (read in full...)
Where else could I meet girls so that I know for definite that they are single? I've trust issues.
Q. I already posted a question at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/fine-except-im-scared-to-ask-out-girls.html, thanks for the advice, however, it didn't quite come out the way I intended. The actual problem is that I have an inability to tru...
A. 12 May 2008: Don't worry too much about it. Even if she had a boyfriend she was still single! Maybe she was looking. Perhaps she was going to tell you during the date that she's got a boyfriend. Perhaps she just thought it might be nice to go out with you.
... (read in full...)
I'm too scared to tell him about my past in case he doesn't want to see me anymore.
Q. Hi, I married when i was 22 (i'm now 27). I was with the guy for 5 years and we have been separated 3 years now. It was an amicable separation, we just grew apart and were too young I guess and rushed into it. I've started seeing this guy who I r...
A. 12 May 2008: So you're a divorcee. Either he can accept it or he can't (some guys can't). Since he'll find out some time in the future (as soon as he decides he's serious about you), it's probably best to let him know now. ... (read in full...)
Unbearable truth....do I move on or wait for a cheater to reform?
Q. I am 38 and my ex gf is 23 going on 24. We had been together for over a year and a half. Chance meeting at a bar and I wasn't looking for someone this young. Firstly, she's geniunely naive, stupid and weak. I slept with her the first night. I had ...
A. 12 May 2008: Sighsighsigh, send me a private message. We have more in common than you think!... (read in full...)
Unbearable truth....do I move on or wait for a cheater to reform?
Q. I am 38 and my ex gf is 23 going on 24. We had been together for over a year and a half. Chance meeting at a bar and I wasn't looking for someone this young. Firstly, she's geniunely naive, stupid and weak. I slept with her the first night. I had ...
A. 12 May 2008: Do you have a saviour complex? Because apart from the feeling that you're "doing good" for this girl, I'm not sure why you are with her. Is she great in bed? Is she as sexy as all hell? Does she have a nice figure? Is she sweet and understanding? ... (read in full...)
Why is it that some people in this world always think that just because there are other people also suffering in this world the problem that you have is nothing?
Q. Why is it that some people in this world always think that just because there are other people also suffering in this world the problem that you have is nothing? Yes there are people in this world going through worse things that you and yes we are ...
A. 11 May 2008: A person who points out that other people are worse off than you is not necessarily trying to belittle your pain.
I was once hurting badly. My (new) partner gave me the example of a person who was faced with a much bigger tragedy than mine. Sh... (read in full...)
She likes hard, fast sex and I'm more into the sensual. I get numb!
Q. i have a couple issues: 1- this girl I'm with (currently) likes really hard, fast sex- the woman I was with previously (for 4 years) liked really slow sex- So now, I'm trying to do the fast thing- and though the sensual, physicality of i...
A. 11 May 2008: I know exactly how you feel. I like slow sex, but many women like hard, fast sex.
I think the problem will even out in the long run. In time it's normal for two people to adjust to each other's style of lovemaking.
Anyway, my suggestion is to... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 10 May 2008: I don't think you love her and I don't see why you should want to see her. You've cut off communications from your end, why should you try and see her now? I think you're only having the same second thoughts as anyone who's terminated a ... (read in full...)
He's 35 and I'm 17 and pregnant, is that really wrong?
Q. I'm 17 he's 35, we have been living together for two months, and i'm 6 weeks pregnant. I love him so much, is this wrong we get along so good, so in love with each other? I left mad and went 7 hrs away to my sister's and he drove all night, tired wi...
A. 9 May 2008: There's nothing wrong with you being with an older guy. 35 to 17 is nothing. When he gets to 50 you'll be 32, which is fine. Don't let people tell you that you can't go with a man twice your age. That's just nonsense.
What is more problema... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks I'm nuts...would you say I was over-reacting?
Q. Please help! I don't trust my own judgment because I have anxiety/depression and take meds. I have a b/f who I have been seeing for about three yrs - All my friends say he is using me - I have decorated and remodelled his house, landscaped...
A. 9 May 2008: You are not nuts. Your instincts are spot on.
You don't propose to someone and tell them that you didn't mean it, you were "half asleep".
His looking at dating sites means he's seriously toying with the idea of finding someone else.
His cal... (read in full...)
I'd expect this from him when I'm old, but not now!
Q. I just caught my husband masterbating to images on the internet. When I confronted him, he said he does this often. I am a 25 year old, 92lb girl, many guys say he is a fool! I'm a very mellow person, and I happen to enjoy porn a lot too, so I didnt ...
A. 9 May 2008: Ok, reading your comments, it seems that there may be more of a problem than I thought. Since I only look at porn when I'm bored or desperate, I'm not sure what to say. I can understand that porn offers variety ('the spice of life') and may appeal ... (read in full...)
I've got back with my husband and it meant moving to his country, But I'm not happy here. What do I do?
Q. Hi, please advise me, i have recently gone back to my marriage, which ment me moving to the country where my husband is from, i am here because of my husband and to save our marriage, as i believed that if i had not come over to him our marriage ...
A. 8 May 2008: I don't know how long you've been in this foreign country, but it sounds like you have a bad case of culture shock. I would check out resources to help you get over this -- hook up with local English people who can help you get used to the way ... (read in full...)
I'd expect this from him when I'm old, but not now!
Q. I just caught my husband masterbating to images on the internet. When I confronted him, he said he does this often. I am a 25 year old, 92lb girl, many guys say he is a fool! I'm a very mellow person, and I happen to enjoy porn a lot too, so I didnt ...
A. 8 May 2008: 92 pounds.... er, what's that in kilos? I presume it's a bit less than 40 kg. Sounds nice!
Now to your question. Is it the porn that worries you, or the solitary masturbation? Even a man with a partner will masturbate, and not just in her presence... (read in full...)
How does someone increase their libido?
Q. Do people have a certain amount of control over their own sex drives/libidos?? Or is it something that is just the way it is? If you lead a healthy life are you more likely to have a healthy sex drive to match? If someone has a low sex drive...
A. 8 May 2008: Men who are successful and confident in themselves, men who have power and know how to wield it (e.g. Bill Clinton) have high libidos. Lack of success, being an underdog, being a down-and-outer, these all cut into the libido. (Who was it said that ... (read in full...)
Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site about strip clubs!
Q. Hey Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site... ladies are welcome to write their comments as well.... After a boys night out in a Strip club .. coming home to your wife,fiance or girlfriend ... wanting to have sex with her at that moment...
A. 8 May 2008: Your issue appears to be that he saw some other woman naked. If you don't like men going to strip clubs, just come out and say so. Don't get it all tangled up with giving or denying sex.
In fact, it's perfectly possible to look at women's naked bo... (read in full...)
He says he can't handle my past, and he doesn't wanna lose me. He says I have to help him overcome this. My question is, how?
Q. Hello, I've been posting about my boyfriend not being able to cope with my past. Recently, he had broken up with me, today we got back together. Please, help me help him. When I went to talk with him today, at first, he didn't wanna see me. H...
A. 7 May 2008: Regrettably, this is one of the most common issues raised on here. When I was 20 I was really cut up about my girlfriend of the time's past sexual experience. I realise now I was unreasonable, and yet at the time it tormented me terribly.
I don... (read in full...)
What's the definition of adultery?
Q. Technical question - Are you committing adultery if you aren't the married person in the affair? If you are the girlfriend of a married man, are you still considered to be an adulteress? And would you only be his mistress if he supported you in ...
A. 7 May 2008: Sorry, it appears that the poster herself isn't the adultress. It's some person on Oprah.... (read in full...)
What's the definition of adultery?
Q. Technical question - Are you committing adultery if you aren't the married person in the affair? If you are the girlfriend of a married man, are you still considered to be an adulteress? And would you only be his mistress if he supported you in ...
A. 7 May 2008: Hey, I'm only looking at this question from the technical viewpoint!
Looking at the link supplied by Irish49, namely http://www.answers.com/topic/adultery, you find that the focus is on the married person.
Wikipedia says that "the definition o... (read in full...)
What's the definition of adultery?
Q. Technical question - Are you committing adultery if you aren't the married person in the affair? If you are the girlfriend of a married man, are you still considered to be an adulteress? And would you only be his mistress if he supported you in ...
A. 7 May 2008: Merriam-Websters:
Mistress: "a woman other than his wife with whom a married man has a continuing sexual relationship"
Adultress: "a woman who commits adultery"
Adultery: "voluntary sexual intercourse between a married man and someone other th... (read in full...)
Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site about strip clubs!
Q. Hey Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site... ladies are welcome to write their comments as well.... After a boys night out in a Strip club .. coming home to your wife,fiance or girlfriend ... wanting to have sex with her at that moment...
A. 5 May 2008: "A woman turns her sexual availability to her partner on and off at her own risk." Having written this, I think it goes for the man, too. Making yourself available to satisfy your partner's sexual desires is part of a loving relationship. Surely we ... (read in full...)
Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site about strip clubs!
Q. Hey Question for the BOYS and MEN on this site... ladies are welcome to write their comments as well.... After a boys night out in a Strip club .. coming home to your wife,fiance or girlfriend ... wanting to have sex with her at that moment...
A. 4 May 2008: Does it matter how he gets aroused, as long as you're the one he wants?
What say a girl came home from a night out with the girls and said, "We all got into intimate talk about our guys. I got so turned on, I just couldn't wait to come home and... (read in full...)
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