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... Send * Connor a private message | | | * Connor's profile:hey my name is laura, im 22. i guess i've been through a good bit on the relationship front, and unfortunately, i've seen the nastiest side of men. i think im pretty good at this and i've always been told i give good advice. i have had friends who have dealt with depression, eating disorders, rape etc., so i have lived it and know how to help ppl. i also have a bit of experience on sites like this! so if you want advice - or just wanna talk (no judgement!) - just email me, ill be happy to do watever i can to help!!! cheers, laura xxx |
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I am never in the mood although initially the sex was great! What to do to improve the situation?
Q. I have been in a relationship for 4 years with my fiance john, I love him very much and I am still attracted to him. When we first started dating we had a great sex life but now I just dont feel like it (I hardly ever feel sexually aroused anymore). ...
A. 28 February 2008: hey hun, well if sex is in any way painful or uncomfortable for you, i would suggest you go to your GP and get a smear test etc.
You could be suffering from some sort of infection or virus, and alot of the time, this affects your libido. are you ... (read in full...)
We both agree watching porn is cheating and the only issue in the relationship, yet he can't refrain from this habit!
Q. I have been engaged for over a year and, to my dismay, my fiance has been looking at porn every opportunity he gets. He had made countless promises to top but has been sneaking. I have caught him on our computer, as he tried to sneak a way that he ...
A. 28 February 2008: ok first of all i really dont think its fair that you have told him you consider this cheating - it is most certainly not. men look at it every day - it doesnt mean they find us any less attractive or anything - its something they do that we will ... (read in full...)
What are the advantages of watching porn?
Q. I'm sorry to ask ladies and gentlemen but i need help in this area. Are there any advantages in watching porn? if yes what are they?...
A. 28 February 2008: well alot of men find that watching porn either helps them masturbate or just makes the whole experience that more pleasurable. porn is also a gateway into alot of people's fantasies - some that may never materialise. it is completely healthy to ... (read in full...)
The ex fiance who harassed my husband and I now surprisingly became part of our sexual games! Should I allow her to aproach similarly?
Q. Okay, let me start from the beginning. When I first met my husband he had an ex fiance that was just obsessed with him and he was totally through with her, but she wouldn't stop trying to get in touch. Finally after about a year and a half of her ...
A. 28 February 2008: well i think that if you and your husband are into this kind of sexual activity, thats fine, but its a dangerous game to be playing when there's an ex involved - especially one who is still not over your husband. i suggest that you try and cut ties ... (read in full...)
Can I expect regular orgasms now?
Q. I experienced my 1st orgasm during intercourse last night-both me and my boyfriend were absolutely delighted.I had to cry out with the pleasure.Can I now expect to orgasm regularly?...
A. 28 February 2008: hey hun yeah you will probably have orgasms more frequently now but dont be disappointed if you dont have them every time you have sex, thats not very possible. clitoral stimulation during sex is also a great way to orgasm more frequently... (read in full...)
I brush him off when he wants sex, so now he's watching porn and hiding it from me, what should I do?
Q. (This is my fake anonymous account. I am Female) I caught my fiance masturbating in the basement while watching porn over the internet. I pretended I didn't see him as he scrambled to cover his tracks. He minimized everything in his desktop and ...
A. 28 February 2008: well its completely normal for men to look at porn and masturbate, so he shouldnt be shunned down to the basement!!and why are you rejecting him?he is your fiancee, you should be completely honest with him instead of making him think there is ... (read in full...)
Will dating her neighbour mess with my mind?
Q. I've been totally messed up from my ex, she is all i think about and i miss her soo much even though its been 8mnths or so since we broke up as she was my first love, but this new girl im seeing lives 5 doors down from her, is it a good idea to get ...
A. 27 February 2008: well hun just make sure that you are ready to be dating again - you dont want to be stringing this new girl along while lusting after someone else - that doesnt sound fair does it? however if you are ready to start seeing this girl then dont let the ... (read in full...)
When I get angry he calls me mad and when I get upset he has little compassion!
Q. I just feel total resentment for my boyfriend of 6 years. We don't live together, he is 20 years older than me (43), we have sex maybe once a month. I broke it off last year and he met someone else (just a fling, we got back together and he crept ...
A. 27 February 2008: you dont know if you could go through a break up again, but you are prepared to be with a man who is selfish, cruel, disrespectful and obviously doesnt consider your feelings. why are you staying with him? do you seek pleasure in pain? no offence or ... (read in full...)
She was dating a co-worker that I didn't know about until I had reason to check her texts messages...
Q. She was dating a co-worker that I didn't know about until I had reason to check her texts messages. If I had not done so I believe she would have kept it going. She told me that she has only been out with him twice once with other co-workers and ...
A. 27 February 2008: well the first thing you need to think about is whether or not you consider kissing cheating - if my partner kissed someone else i would consider that cheating and would not be able to trust him - especially knowing that this person worked with him. ... (read in full...)
OMG!!! Why did I let my friend kiss me?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years and he makes me really happy, I love him so much. In that time I've had a few men interested in me, and I've never wanted to or felt the need to cheat. However last week my male friend, who I've known for a ...
A. 27 February 2008: instead of kissing any of the random guys that are interested in you, you chose to kiss your friend who you have obviously known for a while. this is normal, and kinda shows that you do love your boyf and dont wanna be with just anybody else. this ... (read in full...)
How do I show up to have a Bikini wax?
Q. I want to get my Bikini waxed but I am a very self conscious person and I am very anxious at the thoughts of going because I don't know if I should wear full undies or a thong or what... Please help me relax and offer your best advise... ...
A. 27 February 2008: hey chicken, well first of all just remember that these people have seen it all - its their job!! as for wat to wear, i don't wear a thong, i just wear a normal pair of panties (that aren't too big!!!). it all depends on what kind of wax you are ... (read in full...)
Am I over reacting by feeling uneasy about my partners chatroom activities.
Q. Am I over reacting by feeling uneasy about my partners chatroom activities. I am never told, I have always found out by accident or phone numbers clumsily left out. This has been going on for almost two years. I am always told that these names are ...
A. 26 February 2008: if there are sexual innuendo's etc involved in these messages, then there is no excuse - in my opinion something like that is considered cheating. she is going somewhere else to fulfill her wants and if its not you then there is something wrong. she ... (read in full...)
What are the signs of early pregnancy?
Q. Please, I'm really worried here. What are the signs in early pregnancy? And I mean early as in maybe a month, or just under a month. And also, when you are pregnant, do your periods stop suddenly? Or could you still have your next period? Thanks...
A. 26 February 2008: once you get pregnant, your periods stop - unless there is something wrong in the pregnancy. usually, the first sign is a skipped or significantly late period. sometimes you suffer from nausea, other women dont. alot of ppl dont get any signs or ... (read in full...)
I am stuck in a marriage and want to get out. Please help
Q. I got married 5 years ago we lived together 2 years b4 that. Just before I got married, I re-met the love of my life who I have known since the 80's. I was confused and scared, so I got married (I shouldn't have) We started up a relationship aga...
A. 26 February 2008: i think that you need to be a little less selfish - no offence or anything but staying with your wife just for financial security is so unfair to her. your giving her false belief that you are happy and you are lying to her. you should talk to your ... (read in full...)
Usually somebody gives their medal to their girlfriend. Before I sign should I ask if one day she could be my girlfriend?
Q. I like my friend, she has a boyfriend and she's one year older than me. The other day she asked for my first track and field medal. She also wants me to sign a contract as a joke to make sure I give it to her. Usually somebody gives their medal ...
A. 26 February 2008: she has a boyfriend - not you, so why give something special like that to someone? keep the medal and stay friends with her!! if she asks why you wont give it to her - be honest! tell her that ppl only really give their medals to their gf's but if ... (read in full...)
I am trying to not be so shy and join in more. Any suggestions?
Q. Hi erm well ive always been quite quiet and never really been able to get on with big groups of people. I don't mean as in i don't like them i mean like i can't join in when theres for than 3 or 4 of them. I've really tried to change these past 6 ...
A. 26 February 2008: hey chicken, well its normal to feel like that when your with your peers, but you just have to love yourself and value wat you have to share, once you do others will. as for joining in more, why not suggest having a party or something in your house? ... (read in full...)
Why has he never contacted me again?
Q. Why would a guy tell you that he'll contact you as soon as he's free / has some time, then he never contacts you again - Is it just a polite way of cutting you off or does he intend to come back to you at some stage or you are his 'back up'. I know ...
A. 26 February 2008: well i hate to say it but, yes i think that he may have been trying to let you down easy. how long has it been since you saw him? the reason why he's still got some hold over you is because your still hoping that there may be something still there. ... (read in full...)
Why cant I find Mr. Right?
Q. What is wrong with me? I am soo desperate and ready to meet someone and date them etc However, any guys that I meet or seem to want to go out with me, I have no interest in whatsoever. There are a few guys that text me a lot, wanna see me etc but I ...
A. 26 February 2008: well your still young so no need to be freaking out just yet!! your right not to be settling for someone until something better comes along - its not fair and you could miss someone else while settling. just enjoy going out and meeting new ppl and ... (read in full...)
Could it be he's feeling too much pressure from everyone else?
Q. Hi, I wrote in before about a guy I liked who I thought liked me too. I still think he likes me, and he and I have had some talks about how he treats me when he is drunk and he made huge efforts to change when I told him and I was really proud of...
A. 26 February 2008: well if you think he like you then go for it!! just casually suggest going for a drink or coffee - that way there is no huge amount of pressure and you can keep it light and casual. if it turns into a dinner then fair enough! but dont avoid asking ... (read in full...)
How can I get back together with him without my parents getting mad at me?
Q. Ok, I have broken up with my BF over silly arguments two times this week. They have been more than breakups just stupid fights... but I'm a drama queen so I blow everything out of proportion (this is embarrasing to admit =/). So both times I broke ...
A. 26 February 2008: is your mom dating him? no....so why is it up to her whether or not you get back with him? if you do get back with him though, you have got to try and be a little more mature with him, and not blow everything into a huge fight. ppl make mistakes, ... (read in full...)
I'm starting to have intimate thoughts about a work colleague but I'm married. How can I tell if she's feeling the same way?
Q. I have developed a very close relationship with a woman I work with. We have become best friends and I have intimate thoughts of her. We are both married. She kisses me on the lips quite a bit. When we are out drinking and dancing and she comments...
A. 26 February 2008: well from the way she has been acting, it sounds like she may have feelings for you. but you are both married, why are you considering taking things further?? do you not love your partner? i think this is the bigger issue here, you need to ask ... (read in full...)
HEEELLLLPPPPPP!!! 19 year old guy!
Q. Heeeellllppppppp hi, I am a 19 year old guy. There is this girl I like, she is 16 nearly 17. Well, we met at work a few months ago but she had a boyfriend at the time. We never used to text much, but lately we have text each other loads. ...
A. 26 February 2008: its not that she doesnt like you, its just exactly wat she said - she has just gotten out of a relationship and is not ready - completely understandable. by letting you know, she is being fair to you, if she did say yes things probably wouldnt end ... (read in full...)
I don't want my brother's friend to ask me out but I do want him to know I'm interested in him.
Q. There's this guy I'm really interested in being with, not right now cause I'm not ready. The thing is he's like my brother's best friend and I don't know if I'd be his type or not, but he's really hot and I could see it really going somewhere with ...
A. 26 February 2008: this is really confusing, you want him to know you like him, but you want him to know you dont want to be with him?? your in your 30's, do you not see how immature this sounds? whats the point of letting him know if nothing is going to happen? wait ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants to have anal sex more often but it's very painful for me but I want to satisfy him, what can I do so it won't hurt as much?
Q. Well my boyfriend wants to have anal sex more often but it's very painful for me but I want to satisfy him, what can I do so it won't hurt as much? ...
A. 26 February 2008: if you dont like ti dont do it - if he doesnt like this decision, then he can go find someone else who will let him do it to her. if he really cared about you, he would enjoy sex with you and not pressurise you into doing something you dont want to ... (read in full...)
Should I call my ex boyfriend's current girlfriend and let her know that he has been playing both of us?
Q. Wondering if i should call my cheating ex boyfriend's current girl and let her know that he has been playing both of us. I am the only one that knows about it. She is only 22 and he is turning 34 this year. So she is young and I would be lying if I ...
A. 26 February 2008: i was in a very similar situation last year with an ex of mine. i have had no interest in him or his life since we broke up and maintain a civil persona wen i do see him. i was out in a club last yr with my boyf and bumped into my ex with his then ... (read in full...)
I saw a flirty txt on his phone and now he won't let me see his phone bill...are guys just like that??
Q. hi, my fiance changed careers at the start of the year and has to train for 5 months. He doesnt come home at night until after 9 every night apart from Fri and Sat. When I approached the subject of setting a date for the wedding for a year and a ha...
A. 26 February 2008: Hey hun, first of all I'm sorry, I can only imagine wat is going through your mind right now!! and second of all, you shouldnt really have gone through his fone. the trust that you both had for eachtother is now gone and that is one of the most ... (read in full...)
How can I make our sex more entertaining??
Q. My boyfriend of one year always makes love to me twice or thrice per week and says am good. The only problem is we've been using the same style and i would like to make him feel good like he always does to me. What do i do?...
A. 26 February 2008: there are so many things you can do to spice up your sex life!! different positions is a starters. why not buy some sexy lingerie or a hot maid outfit or something?!! he will go mental wen he sees you!! another thing to do is - if he lives alone or ... (read in full...)
I cheated - what shall I do?
Q. I cheated on my boyfiend at the New Year he doesn't know but I was wondering what I should do, he doesn't suspect anything. Shall I just keep it to myself or tell him what happened? Please help this is so important....
A. 26 February 2008: well was this a drunken kiss or sex? if it was sex then you should ask yourself why you felt like you had to go to someone else for it. if it was a drunken mistake of a kiss, then its up to you. if you feel that its important and is going to affect ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be in a relationship so I use porn, but feel dirty about it
Q. i don't want to go into another relationship for now. to do this, sometimes i watch porns and masterbate after that to calm down my lubido. but i feel so dirty after this most of the time. am i doing the right thing? please help me....
A. 26 February 2008: you shouldnt feel guilty or dirty after masturbation - its completely normal whether your in a relationship or not. however, are there any reasons why you dont want to get into a relationship? you shouldnt be substituting masturbation for a ... (read in full...)
If your a 14 year old girl, are you considered as a child?
Q. If your a 14 year old girl, are you considered as a child? P.s. I'm 14....
A. 26 February 2008: well it depends on who is considering you!! to your parents and grandparents you are always considered their child, no matter how old you are!! especially at this age, you are growing up and having all these new feelings, so they are going to be a ... (read in full...)
How do I reassure myself and stop being paranoid?
Q. Right I'm a 16 year old, average-looking female and although it might not seem much of a problem, I actually fear for my own safety! I get these guys (between 20 and 50 years old) staring at me, checking me out and whistling etc. I suppose I can ...
A. 26 February 2008: hey hun, well your right to be aware of your safety, but letting it ruin your social life is another thing. there are many precautions that you can take while your out - first of all, never walk home or get a taxi home alone. always let your friends ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him I'm not allowed to go out with a boy?
Q. So I'm a 14 year old girl. Through out my whole life I've always been a very nice and shy girl. Since I'm in grade 8 now, I'm around more people, I'm even more shy. This boy in my class(13) likes me and he has asked me out a few times and I have ...
A. 26 February 2008: hey hun well there are two things you need to do 1) if you don't like this guy in that way, then you shouldnt agree to go out with him, tell him that you would rather be friends - saying yes to sound nice is only going to end up with an argument. 2) ... (read in full...)
He isn't sure what he wants, and it's making ME confused. What should I do?
Q. I am 17, and me and my boyfriend have just gone though serious trouble. It started when we argued over soeting stupid, i was drunk and overeacted, and threw my phone at him. He got really angry over the next few days although i tried to apologise ...
A. 25 February 2008: so the two of you get drunk and act like absolute villians to eachother - were is the maturity in this 'relationship'? well for starters having a girlfriend who gets sloshed and throws her fone at him is not something anyone wants to see or ... (read in full...)
Is 13 too young an age to date?
Q. So I'm a 13yd old girl and I just got asked out by a boy(13) in my class. I already knew he liked me and I only like him because he is sweet to me. So I said yes to go out with him because I only like him a little. I'm also allowed dating now. Do ...
A. 25 February 2008: well hun no i dont think that you're too young to be spending time with other guys, but there is a limit. just make sure you remember how old you are, and dont take things too far with him. also, if you dont really like this guy, then dont feel like ... (read in full...)
My co-worker invites me out, could he like me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I met someone at work who i really like. He invites me sometimes for coffee and lunch. He also asked me out for dinner with a few friends. Not sure if i am reading too much into it or not.Do you think he likes me and should i tell hi...
A. 25 February 2008: well im sure he knows that you like him, and if he didnt reciprocate he probably wouldnt want to spend so much time with you. if he saw you as just a friend, then the time you spend together would probably be different. do you go for coffee and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said he will dump me if I ever cut myself. Now I don't know if I want to be with him anymore. Help.
Q. My bf was recently telling me how a friend of his broke up with his gf because she was cutting herself. I was shocked that someone could break up with someone they are supposed to love when they need them so much. I was even more shock to hear my bf ...
A. 25 February 2008: well while your hurt by his potential lack of support, you are not realising that by saying your not sure you wanna be with him is similar. he made this comment in passing and for all you know there may be some underlying issues behind that. he ... (read in full...)
I cheated. What should I do now?
Q. i have been with my man for 3 years and things are great we are getting married in a few months but recently i had it off my ex, help since we split 6 years ago we have remained good friends and now this what to do?...
A. 25 February 2008: well first of all you need to figure out why you cheated, do you really love your fiancee? if you did, then sleeping with an ex shouldnt have even crossed your mind. is there anything missing that you thought you may find with the ex? there has to ... (read in full...)
Cheating fiance - help me please!
Q. I found out that my fiance has feelings for another guy. We have had a stressfull few months,she started a new job, im about to lose mine, im clearly suffering from stress and depression but not getting any support from her, she ended up turning to ...
A. 25 February 2008: well you cant keep hiding these feelings from her, you need to confront her and let her know how you feel. tell her that you need more support from her and that you need to talk about her feelings for this other man. you may also want to consider ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my boyfriend I went back to another guy's house after a night out?
Q. This is kind of the situation i am in. I have been with my boyfriend for 15 months and do love him loads. Never have broken up or had a break before. But recently i found myself going out and flirting more and kind of wishing i was single. Me and my ...
A. 25 February 2008: well you weren't going out with him at the time were you? so technically you didn't cheat or anything. its up to you whether to tell him or not, if you think that he would be hurt or consider this to be a pretty significant thing, then maybe you ... (read in full...)
If you use a condom when having sex, areyou still classed as a virgin?
Q. I've got one curious question to ask you. If you use a condom when having sex, areyou still classed as a virgin? Please tell me, I asked my mum, she said ask your dad so I did but he said ask your mum etc etc. I can never get anywere with my famil...
A. 22 February 2008: nope a condom doesnt stop you losing your v plates, just decreases the chance of you gettin pregnant. i dont agree with the way your parents dealt with this either, it is a conversation for a girl to have with her mother, not be passed around by her ... (read in full...)
Noticed a lump as I pulled back my foreskin. Anyone that may know what this is before I book an appointment?
Q. I'm 16 and i have recently taken note to a problem ive seen. A while back i thought i needed circumsition but the docter told me i just needed to wash regualry as i was kind of afraid of pulling back the foreskin, and im still finding it difficult ...
A. 21 February 2008: hey chicken well it does sound to me like it could just be a large vein, alot of guys have them and they do look larger when they are flacid. but just to put your worries at ease, i would suggest going and getting it checked. as for the smegma, all ... (read in full...)
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