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Latest articles:

HOW YOU CAN FIND LOVE AGAIN

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1 June 2017: GET out there..It might be terrifying,but you need to broaden your social horizons.Go on line,join a club or go to a speed-dating night You will not find love in your living room.REVAMP your image;Ask a good friend to appraise your style.Do you need ...

CatFish, and tips to keep you safe

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10 May 2017: CatFish,has nothing to do with either Cats or Fish.As you will probably know ..CATFISH....is a person male/female who will put a fake profile on dating sites....and will contact many people or maybe just one and have a relationship be it ...

Nora B, Sharing thoughts on observations about life and struggle

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22 October 2016: In this day and age when trains stations are crammed with people,coming and going,roadways are congested with traffic. Meeting deadlines maybe at the cost of ones job. Emotions have taken a backseat,love and friendship are something to be ...

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Nearly 5 years and he says it was a relationship of convenience

Q.   My guy just told me it was a relationship of convenience and nothing beyond. I am hurt, shocked and heartbroken right now. It is not what I expected to hear after nearly five years. I don't know what to say or how to react. ...

A.   23 February 2016: Thanks for the follow.its much appreciated .You have a wise mum.Best wishes for the future .NORA B.... (read in full...)

What suggestions can help me in my situation ? Pregnant and with an abusive husband

Q.   I am 29 years old and married since two years. Also I am 6 months pregnant with our first kid. My husband Ill treats me. He used to do so before my pregnancy and many a times I had thought of leaving him. But now after I got pregnant he had ...

A.   21 February 2016: No man or woman has the right to ill treat the other,and it is very sad to hear that you are scared of him.With respect to your family and their views.REMEMBER YOUR FIRST duty is the safety of your unborn baby and yourself.and its good to hear that ... (read in full...)

Why does he get an erection when touching himself but not when I do?

Q.   Why does he get erection when touching himself but not when I'm touching him? ...

A.   21 February 2016: Maybe he is very shy,depends on the relationship,Also he will know when touching himself where to touch himself to be most effected-hence the erection.Have a chat with him and tell him how you feel.NORA B.... (read in full...)

I feel as if I'm not enough for him. What's wrong, in that he needs porn before he can climax, when we have sex?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together 3 months, its only a short time but i really do love him However in the past week or so we have had some issues when having sex! The past 4 or 5 times we have had sex he has been un able to cum just from sex...

A.   21 February 2016: First of all you are not the reason,but i understand why you would think like this.He is to ashamed to talk about this very sensitive issue,because it must be dreadful for him to be unable to cum with you the normal way.However this could be a ... (read in full...)

Nearly 5 years and he says it was a relationship of convenience

Q.   My guy just told me it was a relationship of convenience and nothing beyond. I am hurt, shocked and heartbroken right now. It is not what I expected to hear after nearly five years. I don't know what to say or how to react. ...

A.   21 February 2016: This is a very sad outcome for you and nobody expects to hear such a thing at anytime in a relationship.One thing you are now sure of is that he is a USER and not very nice person.Right now you you are hurt and shocked,so i want you to be gentle ... (read in full...)

Should I continue to trust my BF? My gut instinct is not to.

Q.   Hi Cupids, I have a worry that has been giving me sleepless nights for nearly three months now. All my intuition tells me not to believe my BF anymore. And try hard as I might, I find it very hard to trust him now. All started at the beginn...

A.   20 February 2016: This is a very hurtful situation to be in and after 4 years plus together.At this stage it would be important to have a sit down chat with this guy and explain in detail how you are feeling.However from your letter he seems to be very casual with ... (read in full...)

Did I ruin my chances with him?

Q.   I kind of had one too many drinks on a first date and ended up texting my date after I got home some stupidity that I feel ruined my chances with him. He never called again. I usually NEVER drink on a date, but it ended up happening on the...

A.   20 February 2016: None of us are prefect,we all do things we should not do and with particular people.Try and not be so hard on yourself over this matter.That is what is meant when they say-You have learned a hard lesson.So turn this experience into a Positive and ... (read in full...)

I'm too conscious about my body to take my shirt off during sex

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for just under 3 months we have been having sex for the last month, however I keep my top on. I had lost 40kg (80lbs) over the last 5 years and my breasts and tummy sag. He has been so patient and supportive for my ...

A.   20 February 2016: Yes this is a very difficult way for you to feel,but you seem to enjoy the sexual encounter anyway.Would you consider having an indept chat with your boyfriend,telling him what way you feel,this will not be easy for you.However if you feel you cant ... (read in full...)

Why don't I have enough self respect to walk away?

Q.   I think he wants me to break up with him. I have been with him for 6 months.He doesn't like confrontations.so he is trying to get me to break up with him. He openly goes out at nights. He is on Craigslist sleeping around.One of my friends set up a...

A.   14 February 2016: You have in fact answered your own question.-Why dont i walk away.Sometimes we hope things will get better.sometimes we get into a rut,sometimes we dont want to make the effort of starting fresh.Maybe we are still in -love.Just know you are being ... (read in full...)

How can I explain that we cannot go back to what we were?

Q.   Good afternoon I have recently divorced after 33 years of marriage (my ex wife's decision). Just over a year ago, during the time I was going through my divorce, I met a lady (let's call her Cathy) who I became good friends with. Cathy is a very...

A.   14 February 2016: Its lovely to know that you are so happy finding that special person in Sarah and this relationship must be guarded at all times.You have to be firm.firm with Cathy for your sake and for Cathy and Sarah.Sometimes we have to be cruel to be kind.In a ... (read in full...)

He has anxiety and OCD and I have anxiety. I'm not sure that this relationship is working out!

Q.   I just moved 2 weeks ago with my bf. We have been together for 6 months. He is a good guy and he has always been patient with me and my issues. But, he can be so difficult at times. Right now, I am unemployed, and he is paying the rent and my ...

A.   14 February 2016: This is a very difficult situation to be in.First of all by virture of the fact that you are not working-does not give him the right to boss and control you the way he is doing-this is totally out of order and must not continue.Its very kind of your ... (read in full...)

I'm going through a really trying time and feel alone in all of this! Advice, kind words, pointers would be helpful!

Q.   hey all I am an art student and I was in college- completed my diploma but dint get accepted for my bachelors. So I have an off year and I'm re doing my portfolio and working part time. It's not the happiest time of my life. I was really taken aba...

A.   14 January 2016: I can fully understand your situation and its not easy,right now one could say you are carrying an overload.But you are still doing very well with regards to your study and on that level you can try and try again.I want you to sit down and reflect ... (read in full...)

I'm always the one starting the conversations, how do I change this?

Q.   I like this boy, but he lives in an another country. My friends all say I'm in love with him, I think they may be right. The boy and I don't talk much, but I think about him constantly. I want to get closer to him, but I'm usually the one starting ...

A.   26 December 2015: He maybe be shy to start the conversation,but he would be aware that you are from different countries and maybe not want a friendship ay such a distance.Its not important that your friends say that you are in love with him.The question is -what do ... (read in full...)

I'm always the one starting the conversations, how do I change this?

Q.   I like this boy, but he lives in an another country. My friends all say I'm in love with him, I think they may be right. The boy and I don't talk much, but I think about him constantly. I want to get closer to him, but I'm usually the one starting ...

A.   26 December 2015: He maybe be shy to start the conversation,but he would be aware that you are from different countries and maybe not want a friendship ay such a distance.Its not important that your friends say that you are in love with him.The question is -what do ... (read in full...)

I'm always the one starting the conversations, how do I change this?

Q.   I like this boy, but he lives in an another country. My friends all say I'm in love with him, I think they may be right. The boy and I don't talk much, but I think about him constantly. I want to get closer to him, but I'm usually the one starting ...

A.   26 December 2015: He maybe be shy to start the conversation,but he would be aware that you are from different countries and maybe not want a friendship ay such a distance.Its not important that your friends say that you are in love with him.The question is -what do ... (read in full...)

May We All Find Peace And Love This Holiday Season

Q.   I wish to offer my most sincere wish of good tidings, good cheer, and peace in a troubled world. If we all watch the news and read social media; we would think the world has gone mad. The mass killings of innocent people. The plight of people who ...

A.   25 December 2015: This indeed is a true Gentleman of Peace.Love and understanding.I read your Article it was beautiful and moving and I in a humble way thank God that a man like you still lives in what has become such a troubled world.In the words of singer Gentleman ... (read in full...)

My mother passed away today, and I feel like a bad son!

Q.   My mother past away today, she was 84, she been in bad health all year, she is in a better place now, but am I a bad son, my girlfriend broke up with me , three weeks ago, am thinking about her more, I love my mom, but my heart is broken, over a ...

A.   25 December 2015: No No you are Not a bad son-just a normal man.Your beloved mum had a long life and had a son that loved her and as you sayshe is now in a better place.She will always be your mum and you will carry around love in your heart for her till the day you ... (read in full...)

My mother passed away today, and I feel like a bad son!

Q.   My mother past away today, she was 84, she been in bad health all year, she is in a better place now, but am I a bad son, my girlfriend broke up with me , three weeks ago, am thinking about her more, I love my mom, but my heart is broken, over a ...

A.   25 December 2015: No No you are Not a bad son-just a normal man.Your beloved mum had a long life and had a son that loved her and as you sayshe is now in a better place.She will always be your mum and you will carry around love in your heart for her till the day you ... (read in full...)

Is there something going on between my son's girlfriend and my husband?

Q.   Son has been with his girlfriend 2 years, had to go in hospital for a couple of days, my husband said give her his number so she can text him to see how hes getting on which she did then recently She sent our son a message on face book to say she ...

A.   25 December 2015: This is a difficult feeling to have however there maybe nothing all all going on.In your own quiet way ask a few questions here and there and see what you come up with .The whole situation maybe quiet harmless-so dont jump-In a situation like this ... (read in full...)

Is there something going on between my son's girlfriend and my husband?

Q.   Son has been with his girlfriend 2 years, had to go in hospital for a couple of days, my husband said give her his number so she can text him to see how hes getting on which she did then recently She sent our son a message on face book to say she ...

A.   25 December 2015: This is a difficult feeling to have however there maybe nothing all all going on.In your own quiet way ask a few questions here and there and see what you come up with .The whole situation maybe quiet harmless-so dont jump-In a situation like this ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend suddenly wants sex all the time and I can't handle it!

Q.   I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 years, and we have had a pretty healthy sex life, we used to have it like 3 times a day, but since we have actually gotten serious into the relationship, I don't need it as much, I so we have it like once a ...

A.   23 December 2015: This is a very diffcult situation for you to deal with,without your girlfriend feeling rejected.However there is 2 people in a relationship and each must respect the others feelings [i am referring to your girlfriend]Because of her problems with her ... (read in full...)

His staring at other women is driving me crazy!

Q.   Hi everyone hope someone can help I've been with my boyfriend for 3 year we have a 1 year old baby together the problem is I know all men look at women but my boyfriend pushes it to the limit a woman can't walk past him without him drooling over her ...

A.   20 December 2015: Its difficult to put up with a situation like this-however as you say all men look at women-but your boyfriend is pushing it to the limit with his insentive behavour when you are with him.Its time to have a serious indept chat with him about this ... (read in full...)

Feeling jealous of my sister. Any ideas on how to sort this out?

Q.   So I feel in a way jealous of my sister, she's 26 and I'm 22, she's married and has 3 children, I really love children, I work with children. I have no partner though. I really wish I was my sister. I'm a shy person so find it hard to form rela...

A.   1 December 2015: There is noting new in one sister being jealous of the other sister.Try and be a little gentle with yourself.Your not really jealouse of your sister-rather what she has .[1]A husband [2]children and so its very human to feel a bit niffit over ... (read in full...)

Do I give it a chance?

Q.   I met this guy online just over a month ago. From the start he was very intense, touchy feely not in a player way but a needy way. This was a turn off for me, which I told him. He acknowledges that but was still persistent to get to know me. I’m on...

A.   1 December 2015: No No you have not gone the wrong way about it you were not to know that you both would have strong feelings for each other in a short time.What you have lost is the control-plan that you had.However if you are confused about this and want more ... (read in full...)

Why does he act like this when I'm supposed to be the love of his life?

Q.   Hi I just want to know what others think to this. I have been with my boyfriend for 18 months. We don't live together yet but are planning to next year. He was my first love and after a number of years apart and us both having been married to other...

A.   28 November 2015: Yes this is a difficuly situation to be in with lies and misunderstandings.At this stage would you consider going to a counsellor to talk things out.Because this way he would know that you are quiet serious and maybe he would listen to the ... (read in full...)

I'm more in love than her should I stay or should I go?

Q.   I Love my wife very much but she does not love me like I love her. She says she may never love me that way again. Should I just walk away? It hurts to love someone who won't love the same....

A.   28 November 2015: This is a very sad situation for you to be in and very lonely one.However your letter did not give any details at all.My questions are [1]Did she love you when you got married ? [2] Did some problem happen to change this.Or is she having some health ... (read in full...)

Do I give my date a second chance?

Q.   I met a guy in his 40s for a drink on Thursday after chatting for two days. The evening went well and I wasnt sure if the chemistry was right but he seemee lokeca good guy. I agreed to meet him Sunday. That night he text he was coming off the dating ...

A.   28 November 2015: Thats one sore point of dating sites-you have been asked out and yet you see him on the dating site -but to be fair you were on it to.You are aware of the RED flag as you stated and ask him to slow down.Everybody needs a second chance-so start fresh ... (read in full...)

I don't know whether my partner is tired of me or is having health issues and is depressed

Q.   my partner and i have been together 2 and half years.she is seperated for 8 years i am single after a 30 yr relationship.we are both in our mid 50,s and have seperate homes 40 m apart.our life rogether has been wonderful upto 3 months ago.previos to ...

A.   28 November 2015: I can understand that you would question your relationship and be concerned.But to be frank with you im amazed that she has time for herself or any relationship with her demands re- her children/grandchildren and work.She could be suffering from ... (read in full...)

My father dying and best friend moving away has me questioning what I should be doing for my future! Advice?

Q.   Hi there, I am in a bit of turmoil right now. I am 35 and live with a lovely guy, however we have no passion it has died, we have been together 3 years and I do love him but I can't help but think what else is out there. My father who I...

A.   23 November 2015: When you are confused the best thing is to do Nothing.I know the lost of your dad and now your best friend deciding to leave re your unhappiness in your relationship.What you are dealing with here is overload.As you stated you are in TURMOIL.This ... (read in full...)

My new boyfriend lives in a tip

Q.   I went round to my new boyfriend's house. I was very shocked. The place is an absolute tip. The kitchen is stacked high with dirty dishes and the washing in piles, garden unkempt and bike parts everywhere. When he came over for dinner he brought a ...

A.   23 November 2015: Well i feel that you have answered your own question when you described the situation as WEIRD.Do you care enough for him to ADVISE him to clean up his act and see where it goes from there.Also would you consider asking him to talk to a ... (read in full...)

I wonder if he misses sleeping with other women

Q.   Hi, I'm just looking for a bit of outside advice really. I am jealous of things that my boyfriend is doing, I cannot stop, some weeks are fine, others are not. I don't know if I should end it because I am jealous and I hate feeling like thi...

A.   23 November 2015: This is a very painful situation for you to find yourself in.I can fully understand how you are feeling insecure and hurt.Its very unfair of your boyfriend to treat you like this and certainly the girl on facebook and his connection with her was ... (read in full...)

Fear of Telling Him I Want A Breakup

Q.   I want to break up with him but I am so afraid to talk to him over a phone call or face to face. Yet I don't want to be the arsehole who breaks up with the other through a text. How can I overcome my fears? ...

A.   23 November 2015: Reading your letter i just wonder the reason Why you USE the word afraid.However if this is the way you feel and yet want to do the decent thing re the break-up Would you consider taking a friend with you and meet in the reception area of a ... (read in full...)

In a very new relationship. How can I make it up to him? Could I have handled the situation differently?

Q.   I'm in a very new relationship (7 weeks) and recently my boyfriend told me that his family had invited us both to a family BBQ they are having for the bank holiday. Now I'm carer and my job is very important to me. Last year I worked my birthday, a ...

A.   22 November 2015: While i understand that your job is very important and you are a caring person.One question i would like to ask yourself is-Did you really did not want to go ?and were you using your job as a excuse.Becaused as you boyfriend stated you could have ... (read in full...)

Will I get hurt? He has troubles with his ex and he gets angry sometimes.

Q.   I met this guy a year ago and we have been dating since. We get on so well, and have become best friends. When we met he had just had a major surgery and was recently divorced. Since getting to know him he has had such a hard two years. He h...

A.   22 November 2015: This is a very difficult situation for you to deal with and from your letter You are very aware of the pitfalls and that is half the situation.However while you make allowances for your boyfriend that is ok but ony to a cetain extent.[1]You must ... (read in full...)

I don't have a job and my husband makes me feel bad

Q.   Hi I can't find a way out of this situation. My husband and I were so in love but first we moved in together everything went south... I stay at home because I cant find a job and he is the only one working so because we had the same studies I feel ...

A.   22 November 2015: If you are trying hard to find a job and you cant ,then its not your fault.But would you consider doing a course to better your chances of getting a job.[1] Attend an in class day course-which im sure you might get a grant[money].[2] Do a on-line ... (read in full...)

Is he blowing me off or just busy?

Q.   Hi I have met a guy on an online dating site and really like him. So need advice because haven't dated in a while. He works night so I understand we can't talk all the time with me on days but for the first few days we would talk for hours on pho...

A.   14 November 2015: I can understad how you feel and yes one would wonder what the real sitation is.However just answer his texts that way you would not be pestering him.If a man wants to text/or meet a woman he will.As its on the internet maybe he has more friends.But ... (read in full...)

Does he want a relationship or hook up?

Q.   I'm always really nervous with new guys because i don't wanna be used as a hook up. Anyway, I started seeing someone a few times now for coffees, dinner/drinks etc. twice now we've ended up at my place and he's stayed four hours or more each time ...

A.   14 November 2015: Enjoy your friendship with this man and take things in a slow fashion.Time and only time will tell if either you or this man want a relationship.Its important to establish a frienship first and see where it goes from there.In the meantime you can ... (read in full...)

My family treats me like second best compared to my brothers

Q.   Im 25 woman and have 2 younger brother with 3 years gap respectively. We live with our successful and happy family. Everybody will think that our family is beyond perfect. Many thinks that my parent succeed raising us. Otherwise. Theres a differe...

A.   10 November 2015: As you stated your parent knows that you are the smartest and the wiser of the 3 of you.Because of this you are not getting much attention and you feel left out.But they know you are well able to fend in a wise way for yourself.Its not that your ... (read in full...)

Second cousin love and love at first sight?

Q.   Recently I met my second cousin for this first time ever. to get an idea of the relationship: his mom is my great aunt. So his mom is my grandmothers sister. When he first walked into the door, I had no idea who he was, but there was an instant c...

A.   10 November 2015: Right at the start of your letter-YOU- answered your own question-RUN-because this is your gut feeling.I can understand that you had a romantic encounter for 6 hours with your second cousin in fact it was a magical time re your conection with this ... (read in full...)

I want sex more than ever, but being pregnant makes me feel ugly. Help!

Q.   I am in my second trimester of pregnancy and I am finding myself becoming aroused very easily, undoubtedly an effect of hormones. But although I am physically aroused and have the desire for and ability to climax a lot stronger than before, I don't ...

A.   7 November 2015: Its not unusual for a woman to feel unattractive when her body is going through so many changes.Would you consider treating yourself to some extra nice nities-having a change in your hair style and perhaps a new perfume.Right now as you say its the ... (read in full...)

What could be causing boobs to start hurting? Could it be my bra? Or..?

Q.   Okay so! About a week ago my boobs hurt so bad for two days and then one morning I woke up and they grew probably close to a cup size. They felt a lot better but now my boobs hurt again all day but when I take my bra off for bed they feel better. Do ...

A.   7 November 2015: That is rather a painful situation to be in.I would suggest.[1]That you would consider going to your doctor and have them checked out.[2]In the meantime i would suggest that you buy a larger bra.Kinds regards NORA B.... (read in full...)

I remind him of his mom.. good or bad??

Q.   Dear Cupids, I am presently seeing a guy . Its been 3 weeks now. We have a great time , being around each other. We communicate on a broad spectrum of topics. Recently, he has been going through some rough patches and I have been helping him to s...

A.   1 November 2015: As you say he has being going through some rough patches and he was lucky to have your helping hand.Its difficult to know exacly what he means re- remark about his mother.[1]He admires his mum and talks a lot about her-that is positive[2]He may ... (read in full...)

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