Why do I attract horrible guys?
Q. Why do I keep attracting horrible guys? what is wrong with me?:(? Am a nice sweet girl, am loyal, caring loving would never lie or cheat on my bf. Each time I meet a guy, they all seem so sweet and find me amazing and I'd think we're in...
A. 8 November 2011: Next time you meet a guy you like, don't sleep with him for a very long time.
Explain what has happened in the past, and how you don't trust easily now.
Be hard to get.
And make sure you check out his past history, look at who his friends are ... (read in full...)
She spent the whole time dancing without me. Am I right to be annoyed?
Q. My girlfriend and I both came from relationships where we both were unfaithful. Understanding this we have trust issues. I make every effort to be mindful and respectful of her feelings to insure she is comfortable with my actions. Recently we went ...
A. 8 November 2011: If you usually dance together, that is bad.
If you don't dance, it is ok she did that.
If you do dance, then yes, to my mind she should have been dragging you up there and spending most of the time if not all the time dancing with you.
... (read in full...)
Almost 40 and still clueless...
Q. At my age, I should probably know the answers to these questions, but being so close to the situation has clouded my judgment and muddied the water... please be patient with me while I try to explain the situation... I married young, and after...
A. 8 November 2011: I know this might be a simplification of things, but I think:
He is in love with you as well.
He pushes you away not so much because you are not the person for him, but because of his own demons - with the emotional and physical challenge he is go... (read in full...)
He's a friend of my husband. What should I do now? I am so hurt by his behaviour after I played a trick and caught him flirting
Q. i always doubted that my boyfriend was not being honest with me when he said that he loves me so to prove my point i created a fake id on face book with a different female name and sent him a friend request which he accepted without knowing that it ...
A. 5 November 2011: You are unhappy in your marriage. You are betraying the trust your husband has in you, with his friend (which is even worse that with a random stranger). Now it turns out this lover is up for sex with anyone and anything. OK, you caught him out - ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has put on weight, she thinks I have lost interested in her, how can I make her understand that I haven't ?
Q. My 4 years old Girlfriend has put on weight in recent months and she thinks I have lost interest in her. Yet I have told her countless times that I haven’t and it’s just that my new position in office demands me to work harder and extend my work...
A. 5 November 2011: Let her lose the weight. If motivation that she thinks you don't like her so much now is helping her get back to normal, then don't make a big fuss. You have told her that you love her however she is. Let her do what she needs to, but also yes, I ... (read in full...)
I wonder if family stress should be blamed for the loss of my cat to kidney disease? Or are there other factors that cause kidney failure ?
Q. Hi Readers, I lost my Cornish Rex Male cat in April of this year. He was like a friend to me and I am still very distressed about it despite having counselling and being on anti depressants. If there are any other cat lovers out there I was just w...
A. 5 November 2011: I just wanted to say first that I am so sorry about what has happened to Rascal. I know that I have been very upset for weeks after losing a pet, and it sounds as if Rascal really was your family - he gave you what they could not. He was gentle and ... (read in full...)
Does my casual 26 year old occasional sex buddy need to know? I'm getting divorced. The 26 year old didn't want me to get pregnant, but now I am.
Q. I am 33 almost 34 with 3 children and getting divorced. I have been casually seeing a guy I met on the internet for the past 3-4 months, he's 26. We both work a lot so only meet up every few weeks and text in between. It's not a relation...
A. 5 November 2011: Are you planning to have an abortion, then?
I don't know. Of course he has a right to know, and almost especially if you are going to decide not to let the child live. I know your personal situation isn't great, and you have to think of the well... (read in full...)
Found out my husband had an affair and frequents massage parlors....should I leave?
Q. We have been married for 30 years. I thought we had a great sexual relatioship but find out now that my husband had an affair for 2 years in our 3rd yr of marriage. Ten yrs later he met up with the same woman and I'm not sure what took place ( ...
A. 3 November 2011: Hmm. Ok. His behaviour is a male failing. What he is doing is bad, but it isn't untypical - he isn't particularly or unusually awful - this is common or garden bad.
So. Do you love him? Is your relationship good? Do you want to be with him?
... (read in full...)
IS my girlfriend cheating on me? I need women's advice!
Q. I just want to know if my girlfriend is cheating. we been together for some time but since we both in two different colleges we dont see each other as much but we do txt and talk on the phone. she recently sent me a picture and i noticed her butt is ...
A. 29 October 2011: What a lot of nonsense. Don't be so ridiculous. It must just be the way she was standing.... (read in full...)
Why do men ask for numbers that they have no intention of calling?
Q. Hello, I do not really understand men. I met this guy in a party as he was with my friends. We talked and he mentioned about going out sometime. Then we got drunk and we slept together. I thought it was a mistake but what is done is done and i di...
A. 29 October 2011: Because he is shy, and a bloke. He obviously thought about you after the event, and then in a bold moment got your number, but never got up the guts to call you. Just wait. It took him 3 weeks to get your number. Maybe it will take him 3 (or more) ... (read in full...)
How do you go about talking to the "other" woman?
Q. How do you go about talking to the "other" woman? I am not a exploding/crazy person and I was thinking that I would talk to her calmly but what to say? I don't know how I would start. But I really do want her to know that she's talking to my ...
A. 29 October 2011: Everything thinks you should talk to him, but it sounds like you have and he denies it. So, yes, talk to her.
Say to her:
Sorry, but I don't know if you are aware that this guy is my boyfriend, we are in a relationship (tell her how long), and h... (read in full...)
She gets mad when I try and intiate intimacy! Has anyone had this with their partner?
Q. Hi everyone, Just looking for some advice from anyone who might have been in a similar situation to me. My same sex partner and I have been in a relationship for 3 years. Most of the time we are great together and are loving and caring. The only thi...
A. 29 October 2011: Ask her then why she should also 'get it' when she wants it?
She sounds horrible.
I don't know. I would be tempted to tell her to get lost, myself. I think she is reducing the relationship to platonic. You might have to get used to it. She obvi... (read in full...)
My past is coming back to haunt me.....
Q. I have a very big problem about my past and I'm not sure how to handle it. My husband I are married almost 10 years, and together over 10 years. My husband thinks that I was not only a virgin when we started dating, but he also thinks that I was CO...
A. 27 October 2011: 1. Do not tell your husband anything about this. Your desire to tell is only because you don't like lying, but actually it will not help your husband to know. It is not something that threatens him. It is something he is better off not knowing. It ... (read in full...)
He's my emplyee and the apple of my eye. Can we be more than that? Do you think that it's all wishful thinking on my part?
Q. I recently hired a new male employee (I am a gay male) who is 16 years younger than me. We have a great relationship at work and have even hung around together after work on a few occasions. He knows that I am gay, and single, and he is well over ...
A. 24 October 2011: I think you have only one option, which covers all bases.
You have to keep your feelings in check (possibly just for now, possibly forever) and be grateful for the relationship you have now. If he says he isn't gay, then even if he might be, he i... (read in full...)
Why did I bleed during foreplay when I've lost my virginity 10 yrs ago?
Q. i'm female, almost 26. lost my virginity 10 years ago when i was almost 16. i was with my boyfriend tonight and after we had some foreplay he had blood on his hand. it most definitely is not that time of month. i cannot and do not understand this. i ...
A. 24 October 2011: It could be that you were scratched by one of his nails. It could be that you have a tender cervix and it was disturbed. It isn't uncommon for this to happen. If it happens again/a lot, you could go to the doctor to be checked out, but I don't think ... (read in full...)
When my ex said "I met a nice guy", was that her way of trying to make me jealous? Or does she really want me to leave her alone?
Q. So I recently am going through a break that happened about 2 months ago or so. I was with this girl for about 8 months and I still miss her. The other night I got drunk (yes stupid) and texted her. I guess I just wanted to text her when I was sober ...
A. 24 October 2011: Sorry but she meant she has moved on and now she is with someone else, so if you can't handle that, don't contact her, but if you can, ok. For all she knows, you might be with someone else. You might have replied 'Oh, that's good. Actually, I have ... (read in full...)
Ladies: How important are a man's looks in a relationship?
Q. Hello. This is not a "problem" as such, but i have a question for the ladies.... TRUTHFULLY, how important are a mans looks in a relationship? I ask this for 2 reasons. Firstly women always say that its personality, kindness, empathy, sense o...
A. 23 October 2011: What that thing about 'he must be nice' means is: If he is beautiful but horrible, after a while he will seem unattractive, despite his physical advantages. It doesn't totally swing the other way, though. If a guy is really nice but not physi... (read in full...)
Do you think a longterm monogamous relationship is a realistic hope to have in modern society?
Q. Hey, Do you think a longterm monogamous relationship is a realistic hope to have in modern society? I'm asking because my bf of 1.5yrs has been making hints about marriage, and it made me wonder if anyone out there actually manages a happy marriage ...
A. 23 October 2011: Of course. It is totally realistic, so long as you really take on board the vows. They aren't just something to say and forget about. The 'for better for worse' bit is important. And yes, you can look upon your relationship as a kind of life's work ... (read in full...)
My dad made me break up with my boyfriend and I need some help
Q. Ok so im 16 and i was in a relationship with an 18 year old polish guy called bercik for about 11 months this november .i was crazy about him and we did everything together.I was drinking before i met him and now my dad is blaming him for it .i lost ...
A. 23 October 2011:
I am so so sorry you are feeling like this. Your dad is only trying to protect you. He thinks you are too young to be drinking, and he is right, really. He doesn't want you drinking and having sex with some guy in a field. He doesn't want you... (read in full...)
How sexy should I encourage my wife to dress for Halloween?
Q. OK, so we are going to a Halloween party. Same party we went to last year. Last year there were a few (like 3) fairly sexy costumes. Needless to say, these women got a lot of attention, and I am sure were the topic of conversation among many couples ...
A. 22 October 2011: We would say 'omigod did you SEE what she was wearing? I don't think I'd want to be flaunting myself if I looked like that ...'.
Sorry, but that's the truth. And yes, we would think different of her after. The cleavage isn't so bad - that would be f... (read in full...)
A girl at work is very touchy-feely with me but she has a boyfriend.
Q. A girl I like text me to wish me happy birthday. She works with me and is quite a bit younger than me (I'm late 20s, she's early 20s). The texts were really informal, call me by my short name and had lots of x's in them. She even sent a text (the ...
A. 20 October 2011: and I think she should leave the guy and be with you. she might be waiting for a sign from you. maybe try to raise it with her ...... (read in full...)
A girl at work is very touchy-feely with me but she has a boyfriend.
Q. A girl I like text me to wish me happy birthday. She works with me and is quite a bit younger than me (I'm late 20s, she's early 20s). The texts were really informal, call me by my short name and had lots of x's in them. She even sent a text (the ...
A. 20 October 2011: she has a massive crush on you - no doubt whatsoever... (read in full...)
Schools won't take me in, do I have a future? Help!
Q. Hey, well before i start i'm 14 years old and i am in England so i'm sure school situations and things like that are rather different to places in America so just clearing that up. Well haven't been in school for a year now...
A. 20 October 2011: You need first to go to you GP and explain everything as you have here. Then you need a new psychologist assessment. I feel so sorry for you - I just can't believe that when you need it most, you are getting zero support. There must and will be ... (read in full...)
My fiance slapped me. Should I dump him?
Q. im engaged and my weve been together for 3 Years. Yesterday we got in a argument and i told him something that pissed him off and he slapped me in the face twice. He has a bad temper but that was overboard.at the moment i told him that i was done ...
A. 20 October 2011: I don't think you should carry on with him.
He will be more abusive in future, more controlling. He will make you feel worse. It will be like army boot camp with him. And slapping could get worse.
If you have the strength now not to be with h... (read in full...)
I love her but she's confused on which path to take!
Q. I am a 35 year old girl who has been in a relationship with another girl for 8 months.She has asked me for a break between us, to see what she really wants.She says she loves me but she is confused on what path to take.To be with a man in order to ...
A. 16 October 2011: I think that if she is unsure about where she is, who she is with and what she is doing, then unfortunately you have to let her go and decide for herself. I know you love her, but you won't be able to keep her unless she wholeheartedly wants to be ... (read in full...)
I'm single and I'm obsessing over a married woman. I want to get closer to her. Is this an emotional affair?
Q. A young woman recently transferred to my place of work. She's from another country, and extremely beautiful. I'm a single male in my mid-20s who works on the opposite side of the building. After her first or second week we just hit it off, started ...
A. 16 October 2011: I really don't think you should touch her. I think you should enjoy this friendship for what it is, but don't try to go any further. For both of your sakes.
If you are so attracted to her, and she spends so much time with you, she is probably... (read in full...)
I took the emergency 72 hour pill 4 weeks ago and I'm still bleeding?
Q. I took the emergency 72 hour pill almost 4 weeks ago now and ive been bleeding ever since. Can someone tell me why and when will it stop? Ive started taking the mini pill and also had tablets prescribed by my doctor to stop the bleeding but they...
A. 16 October 2011: You must go back to your doctor.
And then at some point I suggest absolutely no more synthetic hormones in your body. It will take even as much as a year for your body to restore its natural hormone cycle so that you don't bleed like that.
If ... (read in full...)
I h ave given up everything for him and he cannot give anything back. Do I cut my losses?
Q. hi aunts and uncles, hope you can shed some lignt on my situation please. I met my partner 4 years ago, it was long distant at first but i moved in with him 2 years ago, left all my family and friends cause i wanted to be with him, he has children...
A. 16 October 2011: CUT YOUR LOSSES AND FIND SOMEONE ELSE.
Really. Seriously. The joy of having children is so wonderful, and it is your ticket to a long and happy life. The misery of being without a child, especially for a woman, is terrible.
Somewhere you... (read in full...)
How do I get some balance, peace, more social activities and some friends into my far too busy and exhausting life?
Q. This is a bit long but this vent is a long time coming. Please... try not to look at this as "another loner bitching about pointless shit". I'm really desperate right now and I need some advice. Thanks in advance. A little background befor...
A. 16 October 2011: 1. Rationalise your life. What are you studying at school? Presumably that will point you in the direction of what you are going to do next? Have a plan and a goal. That will get you through the hard times now.
2. Feel very good about yourself... (read in full...)
Prom? To go? Or not to go?
Q. Hello everyone I'm just wondering if I should go for prom this year. It's my only prom. As much as I'm excited at the prospect the price is a big turn off. It's 90 bucks. Although it's not as if my family can't afford it I feel that prom shouldn't ...
A. 15 October 2011: 90 dollars isn't too much for the evening that will be put on for you. Things need to be paid for. That's why you buy a ticket.
If you only ever look at the price tag, you will miss out on so much. Your prom night is pretty much priceles... (read in full...)
My parents have refused my girlfriend who has been on wheelchair since birth, now I want to marry her without their assent, don’t you guys think I have taken the correct decision ?
Q. My girlfriend has been on wheelchair since birth but she's well educated and doing teaching . I think she's so pretty that one can easily compare her with Fairy. She's 5 years younger than me and I am her first boyfriend . We are in a relationship ...
A. 13 October 2011: No doubt. You are doing the right thing. I am sure you will be very happy with your girl. She for sure will be with you. Your parents should be proud of you, rather than angry with you.
They don't like it because you are being independent and doin... (read in full...)
Don't want mum to know I'm on the pill - how can I fake a period?
Q. This sounds like a stupid question, but there is a reason behind it. I'm 16, so please don't lecture me on legality. Myself and my boyfriend are planning on taking our relationship 'to the next level' soon, and decided to take some precautions- nei...
A. 12 October 2011: You can't fake it, but just keep the whole business private. Does your mum snoop, do you think? There's nothing you can do, though. Just don't leave pill packet in bathroom bin ...... (read in full...)
Intimacy problems
Q. I have been seeing a guy for 5 months now. He's lovely and we get on really well. Thing is, after 5 months together there's still been no intimacy. He'll give me a kiss (peck on the lips) straight away when we meet, then the same again when we ...
A. 12 October 2011: well, now you've added those other pointers ... yes, he sure sounds totally and completely gay to me. and the biggest giveaway is awkward hugs. jeez. he is so gay i think. sorry - that's just my opinion.
and if he is ... ok. tough for you. tou... (read in full...)
He wants to buy a motorbike and I am soooooo against it! What do I do?
Q. i lost my brother in a motorbike accident 2 years ago.. got married around 18 months ago... my husband god knows from where he got it in his head that he wants to buy a motorbike.. i told him I am scared begged him not to.. he is being very adamant ...
A. 10 October 2011: It is incredibly unkind of him to be pursuing this obsession, given what happened to your brother ... but I can't help thinking that it is in some way a kind of reaction to your grief over your brother - a kind of tough therapy for you, and a show ... (read in full...)
Intimacy problems
Q. I have been seeing a guy for 5 months now. He's lovely and we get on really well. Thing is, after 5 months together there's still been no intimacy. He'll give me a kiss (peck on the lips) straight away when we meet, then the same again when we ...
A. 10 October 2011: If he was gay, why when he was finally free of his marriage, would he hook up with another woman and sleep in the same bed as her?
I don't think he's gay. I think he has some kind of problem - be it emotional or physical. Will be interest... (read in full...)
He's known as a womaniser...does he want me as a booty call or something more?
Q. There's this boy I've known for months now. He's known as a womaniser around my school and I'm no fool to that. I currently developed feelings for him, and while we were at a party, I was actually trying to see if he liked me too. He didn't star...
A. 10 October 2011: The point about womanisers is:
1. They are particularly attractive - generally have a magnetic attraction for most girls, and this is due to their physical and sexual confidence as much as anything. So, they are the one guy who will hug you and ... (read in full...)
I like her and her best friend!
Q. Hey guys... I'm kind of torn at the moment between two girls. One is this crazy, amazing girl that I met, we became friends, like really good friends. Then she started ignoring me. And I became depressed because I had no Idea why. So I ended...
A. 10 October 2011:
This is what you should do:
1. Ask the first girl what has happened and why she is ignoring you. (I know that is difficult to do, but you kind of need to know.) Ask her if she wants to be with you. Ask her straight. See what happens.
... (read in full...)
Should I tell my ex that I aborted his baby?
Q. My ex broke up with me through email in August to reunite with his former girlfriend in another country (I had no knowledge of her existence until he mentioned her in the email as the reason for leaving me). He dumped me in August this year and left ...
A. 10 October 2011: If you really hate him, tell him.
If you don't, don't tell him.
It will be a horrible truth for him, as he had absolutely no knowledge of what was happening, and no say - you should of course have told him you were pregnant and let him be part ... (read in full...)
A month after saying he needed space, he shows up with a birthday present. What's up with that?
Q. My man asked for space. We have been very much inlove for 8 yrs. I took it bad at first. But now back off.2 weeks after I stayed away with nc he text me and told me happy bithday. I sent him text back with a thank you. 4 weeks later he shows up at ...
A. 10 October 2011: Needing space is just that - it doesn't mean splitting up always. So, he needed to be on his own and decide if he really wanted to be with you. Sounds like he has missed you. Go to his truck and get the present ...... (read in full...)
Can a school nurse give a pregnancy test?
Q. Hi im 15 and i think i might be pregnant the last time i had sex was early september and i had a period since then but it was kind of weird. A little over a week after my period i started spotting and my bras are leaving marks on me i know its ...
A. 10 October 2011: Can you not just go to the doctors? That will be confidential. Also, it might be other things that are making you feel this way.
It is possible, yes, to have a strange sort of short/light period and be pregnant. In what way was the period w... (read in full...)
Intimacy problems
Q. I have been seeing a guy for 5 months now. He's lovely and we get on really well. Thing is, after 5 months together there's still been no intimacy. He'll give me a kiss (peck on the lips) straight away when we meet, then the same again when we ...
A. 10 October 2011: He obviously has some massive hang-up/problem and is very strange. And is very controlling, and keeps everything absolutely under compartmentalised and separate.
I really don't think you will get anywhere with him. Tell him that you need passion,... (read in full...)
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