On the verge of buying a house with a miserly man who only tolerates my children
Q. Scared. My second marriage begun disasterously my second Husband refused to bond with my children lied cheated and left me when I lost my job with his baby and my two other children to fend for ourselves financially and otherwise. My Son who is 9 ...
A. 5 March 2012: Your children are the most important people for you to look after. They are your Number One. He is, as my daughter would put it, Number Twenteen (if he's lucky).
Look, life is just too bloody short for this nonsense. You would manage fine financia... (read in full...)
My BF will flip out over this. But was unacceptable for my coworker to give me, and the others, a quick hug?
Q. Ok. So heres my question, please give me your opinions/advice whatever it may be! So today everyone in the office bought a gift we all contributed to for a male coworker. He gave everyone a quick hug, male and female. I know my boyfriend wouldn...
A. 1 January 2012: What??!! This is crazy. A work acquaintance gives everyone a small hug to thank them for buying him a present, and you think your partner would flip out at this? I'm sorry but you really have this massively out of perspective. It is not something ... (read in full...)
Am I nuts, or is it wrong of my ex wife to make me a babysitter so she can get laid in her own bed?
Q. I am worried (I guess that is the best word) that my ex-wife is shirking some of her responsibilities as primary custodian of my son. She is a great Mom, but I have been asked a few times lately to take my son and keep him out to a specific time. ...
A. 1 January 2012: I don't think it is wrong for you to be with your son so that she can have some private time to herself, but I do also have a 15 year old son, and I know that he pretty much likes to be at home in his room, and that his visits to his dad have ... (read in full...)
Even though we took all necessary precautions, I'm not feeling well, could I be pregnant?
Q. I recently lost my virginity to my boyfriend (21st Dec) ... it was an a amazing experience as we had waited for ages to show our love and commitment to each other. We of course took the necessary precautions before we made love to each other, w...
A. 1 January 2012: What you describe aren't the symptoms of pregnancy, and as you are being so careful (pill and condoms), you just can't be pregnant. The pill, by the way, stops you ovulating - so you just wouldn't be fertile at all. It makes you barren. There is no ... (read in full...)
An ex wife, an Autistic son, a crazy ex girlfriend, and another son-that's my B/f's life. Any thoughts on how best to handle this situation?
Q. I have been in a relationship with a wonderful man for nearly 2 years. We were talking about marriage..etc. He has been divorced for over 10 years and has a 10 year old Autistic son from his previous marriage. He is a dedicated father and pays ...
A. 30 December 2011: First wait for the paternity test.
Then:
- If the child is not his, be happy.
- If the child is his, consider what you would be losing if you said you couldn't cope with him having two children. His one son is only every other weekend. Tha... (read in full...)
Was my disappointed reaction to be expected? He visited a lap dance place after his work Christmas party
Q. Hi everyone and merry christmas. so i wanted to ask some advice and opinions off of you. so i met this guy online 3 months ago and we have totally hit it off and we have chatted loads and got on really well and plan to meet up in a couple of w...
A. 25 December 2011: I think it was totally harmless - he was just in a group, and went along with what they were doing. It would have seemed weird if he had not gone.
And, you only know each other online and have not even met yet.
And, he told you about it.
... (read in full...)
I ran away, now I'm pregnant and don't know how to tell my Mom!
Q. i need help please! my mom and i got in a huge fight about a year and a half ago about her and her boyfriend getting married i couldn't and i still can't stand him..time being she hated my boyfriend to, he probably wasn't and probably still isn't ...
A. 20 December 2011: Just say what you have said here.
Just go and see her and tell her everything.
I am not quite sure how she let you go - how come she didn't come and get you back - but I guess because she knew you and her new husband didn't get along, she mayb... (read in full...)
Husband and mother in law issues...
Q. I have been married to my husband since 2008. I moved in with him because him and his mom already had a house. She put the down payment and he pays the monthly morgage. His mom is 72 set in her ways and a perfectionist about the cleaniness of the ...
A. 17 December 2011: If I think about sharing a room with my husband and his mother, it makes me feel faintly sick. It really is a very odd idea. Just get her a separate room. Where's the problem? Ok, it costs more - but it is a necessity. That way the MIL comes to the ... (read in full...)
Who do I choose? The ex who abandoned me and our son or my current boyfriend who's a wonderful guy?
Q. My ex and I were together for 6 years. We started dating when we were teens I gave birth to our son when I was 20. A few years after that, we broke up because he was not ready to take the responsibility. He was kinda immature that time. Then I...
A. 13 December 2011: Well, now you have explained more about the father of your child - then I think you shouldn't be with him. He is gone, so let him be gone. I am just not totally sure about your fiance, because I think that if you were totally committed to him, you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend pressures me to have sex and I hate it
Q. My boyfriend always wants sex and I hate sex more than anything. Is it normal for me to feel so guilty for saying no. he gives me this rude attitude after I tell him my answer, helpppp I dont know what to do. I have talked to him about it a ...
A. 11 December 2011: He is not right for you. You are not right for him.
If he was right for you, you would want to have sex with him. Because the right person would make you feel that you wanted to be close to him, and he would also treat you in such a way that it w... (read in full...)
My husband left me for a younger woman. Is this Karma?
Q. How do I repent for all the hearts and minds that I toyed with and crushed? I never knew what it felt like to be crushed because I was always the one doing the crushing and not giving crap about how I left my victims broken and damaged. I left ...
A. 8 December 2011: It isn't a question of repenting.
It is a question of understanding that the humility you feel is something you can learn from.
To get over this, you need actually to stop blaming yourself. It happened. Yes, probably because you treated your... (read in full...)
I want my husband to be enamored with me like he was before..
Q. So...my husband and i SEEM to be good. It is just beyond frustrating at times. I can say for sure, i want sex more than he does. Is it just a hormonal thing, is it more? We're 28, happily married i think. I just want him to be enamored with me like ...
A. 8 December 2011: It is just what happens. To everyone. And every female wants the male to love her 'like he did'. But he won't - because what you felt was him on full-course, full pursuit - it was the thrill of the chase and the moments of satisfaction after the ... (read in full...)
What do you do when drugs come into play within your marriage?
Q. Dear cupid what do you do when drugs come into play with your marriage ? i have recently found out that my husband has been getting high while away at work with his crew mates they all seem to be doing it and act like its no big deal . But when you...
A. 8 December 2011: Can't he get a job where he doesn't go away?... (read in full...)
Who do I choose? The ex who abandoned me and our son or my current boyfriend who's a wonderful guy?
Q. My ex and I were together for 6 years. We started dating when we were teens I gave birth to our son when I was 20. A few years after that, we broke up because he was not ready to take the responsibility. He was kinda immature that time. Then I...
A. 6 December 2011: 1. Don't marry your current bf just because you feel it would be mean not to.
2. You have doubts because you know in your heart of hearts that for your son, it would be better if you were together with his father. You haven't tried living with you... (read in full...)
Can anyone advise on what we are doing wrong and how to get back on track?
Q. Hi All, I am in dyer straits... I feel I have no where to turn to or have a shoulder to cry on... I have been with my husband since I am 17. We are together a total of 11 years and married for 3.5 years. He lost his mother to cancer at a young age ...
A. 6 December 2011: Ok.
First thing, it is very early days since you lost your mum, who was really your whole family apart from your husband, and you are still only at the start of adjusting to a world where she is not readily contactable. So, give yourself time ...... (read in full...)
Should I go through with an abortion at 21 weeks?
Q. im 21 weeks pregnent with no family around me they all live in australia and my partner has decided to leave me and now wants nothing to do with my child and me i dont think ii can do this whole thing on my own so have recently thought about ge...
A. 29 November 2011: pps
You say all your family is in Australia - but have you told them about the baby? I think if they knew they might try to help.
What about friends? What about your partner's parents/family? They would probably also want to help.
If you just... (read in full...)
Should I go through with an abortion at 21 weeks?
Q. im 21 weeks pregnent with no family around me they all live in australia and my partner has decided to leave me and now wants nothing to do with my child and me i dont think ii can do this whole thing on my own so have recently thought about ge...
A. 29 November 2011: ps
and if Shadow Rose is worried about you getting depression - well, the risk is far higher with having such a late abortion. I had an early abortion and suffered depression, anxiety and post traumatic stress disorder - AND STILL DO, 21 years on. ... (read in full...)
Should I go through with an abortion at 21 weeks?
Q. im 21 weeks pregnent with no family around me they all live in australia and my partner has decided to leave me and now wants nothing to do with my child and me i dont think ii can do this whole thing on my own so have recently thought about ge...
A. 29 November 2011: It will be monstrous, will scar you emotionally and possibly physically for the rest of your life, and how bad you will feel afterwards, and how upset, is indescribable.
But of course, it is a choice. Your choice is:
Have your baby, draw stren... (read in full...)
Is boarding school the right thing in this circumstance?
Q. Recently my wife and eldest daughter died in a car crash and i was left on my own with a 14 yr old daughter. her mum used to work at her current school and her sister went to the sixth form there and shes told me that she dosent want to go there ...
A. 25 November 2011: Firstly, I am very impressed by how despite this unbelievably awful family tragedy, you are there for your daughter in this way.
My son goes to boarding school, so I know something of it. I also went.
It is interesting that your daughter ha... (read in full...)
My gran has cancer and I want her to be around to see me get married and have kids....should I talk to my partner about getting married sooner?
Q. Just wondering if others can offer some advice. My gran, who i am really close to is in her 80s. I have always had this wish that she could be around to see me marry and provide her a great grandchild. WHen my grandfather passed away, it made me...
A. 24 November 2011: Sorry - I am an old sentimental - I think it WOULD be great for your gran to see you married - I think this is one of those extreme situations where if you were going to get married anyhow, then it IS ok to ask your fiance if you can bring it ... (read in full...)
No emotional bond in my marriage and my in laws hate me. Any advice?
Q. i have been married for 3 yrs with 12 month old baby girl, my inlaws hates me and my husband is not standing for me,he's always on the side of his family whenever we traveled to the family house,the last time we traveled i was humiliated, rejected ...
A. 24 November 2011: Yes, move on, move on. Get away. This is nonsense. Life is too short. Find someone you love.... (read in full...)
Starting over again. Running out of time to have a family. Will men be put off by my situation when I start dating?
Q. I am 39 (40 next spring) and childless. I have just come out of a 10 year marriage which pretty much destroyed my sense of self worth / esteem. I am still a little raw but trying to move on. My hopes and dreams for a happy family life with a lovi...
A. 21 November 2011: ps
and actually in my opinion having kids IS a passport to unconditional bliss, relatively speaking - so you are totally right to get moving on this - and to feel upset that you haven't got children yet - so turn that angst into action and find the ... (read in full...)
Starting over again. Running out of time to have a family. Will men be put off by my situation when I start dating?
Q. I am 39 (40 next spring) and childless. I have just come out of a 10 year marriage which pretty much destroyed my sense of self worth / esteem. I am still a little raw but trying to move on. My hopes and dreams for a happy family life with a lovi...
A. 21 November 2011: Loads and loads and loads of women get together with someone in their late 30s and have children almost immediately. Lots of my friends did. Together one month. Married six months later. Pregnant a month after that.
Some guys get it. Actually... (read in full...)
Starting over again. Running out of time to have a family. Will men be put off by my situation when I start dating?
Q. I am 39 (40 next spring) and childless. I have just come out of a 10 year marriage which pretty much destroyed my sense of self worth / esteem. I am still a little raw but trying to move on. My hopes and dreams for a happy family life with a lovi...
A. 21 November 2011: Loads and loads and loads of women get together with someone in their late 30s and have children almost immediately. Lots of my friends did. Together one month. Married six months later. Pregnant a month after that.
Some guys get it. Actually... (read in full...)
She has left me and is now engaged to her ex! What should I do?
Q. Hi, I am a male 24 y.o a graduate student study abroad. When I study abroad, I met this angel, she is the most beautiful girl I ever seen, and I love her so bad (we came from the same country, btw). The problem is that she already have a boyfrien...
A. 21 November 2011: Do mice really love rice?
Ok. I want to ask what country you are from.
And ... if you were horrible to her and made her cry a lot, that is why she is going to marry her ex - because he loves her and doesn't make her cry.
She might have ... (read in full...)
He used to mess me around but now he's back in my life wanting a bit of fun...I'm not getting any younger, so should I go for it?
Q. I'm not getting any younger and will be a 40 next year but during those years, I have not really had a steady committed relationship with anybody as I have been messed about and let down a few times. I have had a few dates along the way but nobody ...
A. 21 November 2011: How old do you think you are? What do you think is going to happen to you that you will be so past it?!! Frankly I intend to be having sex aged 95, with a nice young Brazilian of no more than 35. I may have to pay him, but hey.
Look, you don't me... (read in full...)
Will he choose me over his girlfriend of 9 years?
Q. I wanted to ask is there any chances that the person i love will chose me over his girlfriend for nine years? Can you give me advice of what to do? i really love this guy. Will i let go of him? or fight for this guy? he said he love both of us. ...
A. 21 November 2011: We gave you our advice - let go. You don't want to do that. So ok. Hold on. Wait. See what happens. Probably heartache for you, and for her, but hey. That's life.... (read in full...)
Will he choose me over his girlfriend of 9 years?
Q. I wanted to ask is there any chances that the person i love will chose me over his girlfriend for nine years? Can you give me advice of what to do? i really love this guy. Will i let go of him? or fight for this guy? he said he love both of us. ...
A. 19 November 2011: To be honest I think it is unlikely he will choose you. I guess if he has been with her 9 years then he must be at least 25, and probably older than that - probably in his late 20s at least. So you are probably at least 10 years younger than him. ... (read in full...)
He chose to spend our 1 year 10 month anniversary with his college friends!
Q. Ok I know this sounds a bit stupid but yesterday was our year and ten months anniversarie but he kept telling me last week that he was gonna surprise me wit breaking Dawn tickets and so I was just thinking it comes out Friday it's our day Friday ...
A. 19 November 2011: Do you celebrate every month your anniversary? I'm not sure what the significance of 1 year and 10 months is. I would have thought ok, 1 year, 2 years, 3 years, etc. ... but 10 months seems a bit over the top. If you celebrate every month, it won't ... (read in full...)
Can a guy's car make him more (or less) attractive?
Q. Here’s a bit of a strange question. Does the type of car a guy has make him more attractive or less attractive? Does it have an influence on women? The reason I am asking this question is because of this, I used to have a classic BMW, one with ch...
A. 18 November 2011: Absolutely.
There are certain cars that would make me feel that even if he had up to that point seemed like the best guy in the world, if he drove any of those cars I would immediately go off him. Seriously.
And there are other cars that ... (read in full...)
Eleven years together. I am seriously clucky for children. He wanted children. Now his mind is closed to the idea. what can I do?.
Q. I'm feeling extremely maternal at the moment and it's causing problems in my relationship. I'm 28, almost 29 and I've been with my boyfriend for 11 years. We've only been living together for just under a year. I know. Things have moved slow ...
A. 16 November 2011: Tell him you want kids or that's it - a dieu, and not au revoir. Curtains. Good bye.
Don't waste your life. Nice and cosy as it is with him, it is nonsense without children. All your instincts are right.
And you don't want to waste the next 5... (read in full...)
My boyfriend insists on attending a concert while I'm in surgery
Q. This may take me some time to write so here goes. I've just moved in to a house with my bf of two years, we've got a mortgage togther. We started to try for a baby around a year ago and in september I got pregnant with fertility treatment. After ...
A. 16 November 2011: I really hope it went ok.
I think he can't cope with upset, operations and this whole issue. He is being very male about it, in a bad sort of way.
I think, though, there are so many emotions flying around now, especially yours (understandably)... (read in full...)
On the verge of buying a house with a miserly man who only tolerates my children
Q. Scared. My second marriage begun disasterously my second Husband refused to bond with my children lied cheated and left me when I lost my job with his baby and my two other children to fend for ourselves financially and otherwise. My Son who is 9 ...
A. 16 November 2011: Hey ... don't do it. I think it will get worse if you buy the house with him. Without a doubt.
And listen to this. You are the 4th person I now know of who has exactly the same problems, ie:
The guy who you are with, who isn't the father of yo... (read in full...)
How can I leave my husband without hurting my kids?
Q. I have been married 27 years to my high school sweetheart and we've had our good and bad times in our relationship. I've tried to leave multiple times through the years for different reasons but have no family and always felt alone and that I couldn...
A. 14 November 2011: You can't leave because you know you would devastate and decimate the lives of your closest loved ones - your children, and your husband.
So don't do it. Stay with them, love them, and be happy with them. If you have to sacrifice romance, it is wo... (read in full...)
My fiance and I really want a baby, but are we ready?
Q. Hello everyone, usually when I find myself on this site I'm having a very depressing problem but now I'm just in a dilema. My fiance and I recently just moved out of a house we shared with room mates into an apartment so we could get along better ...
A. 14 November 2011: Oh just go on and do it. It is a good time to have a baby. If I had a choice now, I would have all my children in my early twenties. Just do it. Your body is never wrong, and it is telling you something.... (read in full...)
I left my boyfriend for another man, but now that other man has left me for his ex girlfriend
Q. So I wrote on here a little while ago about cheating on my bf well I ended up doing the right thing and breaking up with him. I continued to see the other guy but now he is back with his slut ex who treats him like shit. Well I have told him I had ...
A. 14 November 2011: Let it go because he doesn't want you enough.... (read in full...)
Other Non-Pregnancy Methods
Q. Hello everyone, I thank you for taking your time reading this, I was only wondering if there is any other way to prevent pregnancy other than condoms and birth control pills. I really appreciate it, thank you....
A. 13 November 2011: It sounds like you are looking for natural ways to do this, in which case the options are:
1. No sex.
2. Charting your cycle and only having sex on the very safe days.
The safe days are from about 4 days after you have ovulated, until abo... (read in full...)
Am I asking too much for handmade birthday cards from my grandsons?
Q. I have two sons, 32 and 30 years old and I have two grandchildren, one is 4 and other is 1 year old. It was my birthday today 11/11/11. Earlier this week I asked my sons to make, with my grandchildren, a birthday card for me with the date 11/11/11 ...
A. 11 November 2011: It is just dreadful that they haven't managed to make or even buy a card, and a present, for you - it is just so upsetting, as we are all particularly vulnerable on our birthdays.
But it isn't going to help you to feel like that. For sure they jus... (read in full...)
I'm 6 weeks pregnant, against abortion and the guy is no longer interested in me and has a girlfriend
Q. 6 wks pregnant and worried about our relationship? Is he done with me now? What should I do? I'm 18 and have been in college mostly interested in singing only interesting thing about college is this guy I'm highly attracted to. We had hooked up...
A. 8 November 2011: Do not even say the word 'abortion' again. It is not an option for you. You are against it, so don't even consider it.
I think you should go through the pregnancy comforting yourself with the fact that you are close to him at least through ... (read in full...)
I'm still attracted to him and want to resume the affair. But how do I handle the fact that he also wants me to tell my husband who is really the father of our child?
Q. I had an affair with a man who is a friend of an old fling of mine from the past. Plus he’s now married. He was from my home back in One state, and I had moved to another state. We bumped into each other one evening while he was having drinks with...
A. 8 November 2011: Wow. Does the child's needs feature at all in any of this? Sorry, but it all seems to be centred around how you want to be in bed with this guy. You don't seem to have any feeling that cheating on your husband, and this guy on his wife, and kind of ... (read in full...)
I do not know her father's name. Should I leave that blank on the form? Or put my new boyfriend's name on the pre-school form as "father" to avoid questions?
Q. I was raped nearly 3 years ago by a disgusting guy at a friends party. I didnt know who he was and still dont. What he did to me was awful but it had a hidden blessing. It created a beautiful baby girl who i love to bits. I decided to keep the baby...
A. 8 November 2011: Firstly just to say I am so glad for you that you have such a lovely daughter from this experience, and all credit to you that you went ahead with the pregnancy. Very brave of you, but ultimately a loving act, and that is why you now get so much ... (read in full...)
Why do I attract horrible guys?
Q. Why do I keep attracting horrible guys? what is wrong with me?:(? Am a nice sweet girl, am loyal, caring loving would never lie or cheat on my bf. Each time I meet a guy, they all seem so sweet and find me amazing and I'd think we're in...
A. 8 November 2011: Next time you meet a guy you like, don't sleep with him for a very long time.
Explain what has happened in the past, and how you don't trust easily now.
Be hard to get.
And make sure you check out his past history, look at who his friends are ... (read in full...)
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