Who means more to you - the person you loved first or the person you love today?
Q. So I'm just curious here. Who do YOU guys favor more? Do you have more thoughts, special feelings, or emotions towards your "first love" or towards someone who's your "new" love??! I find myself going back and forth between these two guys and there ...
A. 3 February 2014: Your first relationship will always be special and you in part will always love them.
But your current one is your partner. There's no point in pining for things that didn't work out.... (read in full...)
I suffer from premature climaxing, any advice?
Q. I am a married women in my 30's and I suffer from premature climaxing... My husband and I don't have sex that often (once a week) due to family commitments and work and because of this I'm all pent up with desire, as soon as my husband enters ...
A. 3 February 2014: yes, my second girlfriend had this problem.
Was annoying lol.
The only options I can think of are "learn to have multiple orgasams" or try sex, foreplay then sex again and see if it works.... (read in full...)
He threatened that tomorrow either she's gone or he's gone. Any advice would help!
Q. Hello and thanks I have been married 22 yrs. I got married young. Its been abit of a roller coaster at times but somehow I stayed. My husband can be very mean when he drinks. He calls me names points his finger in my face I tell him to stop. Whe...
A. 3 February 2014: call him on it.
I bet he backs down... (read in full...)
Would it be best to keep my sexuality to myself for now?
Q. I've finally come to terms with my own sexuality as being gay, and I feel as if my parents already have an idea however they're always making a joke of it and have made it quite known that it's not something they agree with! Is it wrong to not tel...
A. 3 February 2014: I'm not gay. But this what I think is the best option. Stay in the closet. Finish growing up. Just say what I said while a teen "I'm just not into those girls (boys in your case) at school. Mess around with girls, but don't admit anything. Lea... (read in full...)
My first love has already moved on, but I feel like a lousy person because I'm falling for his best friend!
Q. So my ex boyfriend moved 6 hours and now has a new life and a baby with another girl. (They are not together by the way) HOWEVER, him and I still occasionally talk. We acknowledge that we still have a lot of love for each other but that the distance ...
A. 2 February 2014: As a guy, I have to be honest here. I wouldn't like to see my friend dating my ex.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is circumcised and takes too long to orgasm. Sex hurts me. What can we do?
Q. 6 months of horrible sex. I am dating a men that is (''cut'') he is the first one I have dated. It is like his penis is desensitise, he thrusts and pounds during sex as if my vagina was made of steel, he takes very long to orgasm and I get sore a...
A. 2 February 2014: I have an "out there" idea.
Maybe we are looking at this wrong.
What if we can re sensitise him?
His penis being exposed is causing the problem isn't it. So what if every day he applied lube or a skin softening lotion to his dick, put ... (read in full...)
He wants me to text dirty ...
Q. my boyfriend wants me to send him dirty/horny texts and i don't know what to write.i need some ideas please help....
A. 2 February 2014: read "literotica" for ideas.....IF you want to do this.... (read in full...)
Stepmother issue: I want to reconnect with my Dad, just my Dad and I. Am I being unreasonable? Honest opinions please
Q. I spoke to my dad the other day on the phone for the first time in a while. I've never lived with him and he has recently married his long-term girlfriend, who I have never got on with. When I was younger and obligated to stay with him occasion...
A. 2 February 2014: Your not be unreasonable at all.
Enforce this. You don't have to put up with her, and shouldn't even acknowledge her at all.
Your Dad can man up a bit and come and see you from time to time.
His partner will cry at first, but will get used... (read in full...)
Would it bother you if your partner was a nude model for Art Classes?
Q. Hi Everyone, I'm 23 years-old, and I'll be graduating with my Masters degree in May. I've generally kept to the "straight and narrow," so to speak--I almost always follow the rules, I've only had sex with one person (an ex bf), I do don't drugs, ...
A. 2 February 2014: I't would only bother me, if the pictures started showing up and she made it a whole thong that I would be caught in the middle of.
Also most people posing nude, don't think about who will be looking at the pictures.
There are loads of people ... (read in full...)
Should I apologise to the ex for my wrongdoing?
Q. I broke up with my ex 7 months ago because we fought too often. We had a brief period of no contact, but eventually he started talking to me again about once a week. We decided to give things another go about 2 weeks ago, but I bought up old issues ...
A. 31 January 2014: Let it go Rule 1 of relationships: When its over, its over.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is circumcised and takes too long to orgasm. Sex hurts me. What can we do?
Q. 6 months of horrible sex. I am dating a men that is (''cut'') he is the first one I have dated. It is like his penis is desensitise, he thrusts and pounds during sex as if my vagina was made of steel, he takes very long to orgasm and I get sore a...
A. 31 January 2014: Ok its time for you to cut the crap here. He is a dud in bed. You aren't enjoying it at all and he is even hurting you. Solution: Lubrication and lots of it. He is also going to have to put in overtime, foreplay wise. Fair is fair. You have to ... (read in full...)
I read my boyfriend's journal didn't like what I read but now I want to read it again!
Q. I'm usually not a snoop, I trusted my boyfriend when we were together, but I did something I'm ashamed of. I read his journal, and I didn't like what I read. It basically said his was unhappy with our relationship among other things, but nothing ...
A. 30 January 2014: Can I be honest here...
I think deep down you want to be done with him.
His comments in his journal hurt you a lot more then you realize and you really don't want to be with him. Why would you want to be with someone who doesn't want you... (read in full...)
I'm not so interested in sex and I'm afraid my boyfriends desires will lead him to cheat
Q. Hiya aunts and uncles, my fiancé of 4 months and dating for 3 years has been talking in his sleep and has expressed the same concerns in his waking hours. He is 26 and im 23 on valentines day. well, its like this: he doesn't feel like we are inti...
A. 30 January 2014: To answer this question honestly I will have to ask you 2 questions:
1. If the roles which you just described were reversed, what would you honestly do?
2. As above, what would you want him to do?
Think about it and you will have your answe... (read in full...)
I can't seem to hit a girl's g spot
Q. i have 6.2 inch penis 4.5 inch straight and and around 2 inch slight down curve.. i had sex with thirteen different girl but i never get any negative comment but i still fell insecure because i think i m not able to satisfy and make girls orgasm in ...
A. 30 January 2014: different horses for different courses. Women are not all the same.
Missionary might make one girl climb the walls, but it will bore the next one to death.
So do something else that she likes. try a few things and have loads of foreplay.... (read in full...)
Taken advantage of in business with friend
Q. Hi all, I have a problem with a friend that I have known since I was 12 yrs old. Recently she opened a shop and as I have a manufacturing business she asked me if I had any excess stock that she could put in her store on consignment. For those w...
A. 30 January 2014: Its time for a sit down. You both need to talk this out, face to face as friends, not as client and supplier. Try to be understanding and not trying to solve her problems. Her business might not be doing well. That would explain why she is la... (read in full...)
I like watching lesbians, does that mean I am one?
Q. I enjoy watching lesbians, but I love boys and think they are so sexy, I only want to be with boys but sometimes when I'm watching the lesbians I want to be in that situation for just a second but when I think about it again when I'm not watching it ...
A. 2 April 2013: Well you could try it and see what you think. ... (read in full...)
Guys: How would you react if a girl told you she was a virgin?
Q. To cut to the chase: I'm a virgin at 25. And I feel ancient being one at this age. I'm not a christian, so I didn't save my self out of religious beliefs. I did hold on to that romantic notion that the first time should be with someone I love, but ...
A. 2 April 2013: Kind of awkward at first to be honest. But he will get past that pretty quick and just enjoy the relationship. ... (read in full...)
Am I too nice to my boyfriend?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend going on two years now, and everything (for the most part) is going well. But I'm starting to think I'm too nice to him, and that he's either taking me for granted, or maybe sees me as being too "easy" or even boring. ...
A. 28 March 2013: So you have a good relationship?
LMAO it really is that rare isn't it that you immediately get scared.
Just enjoy it and enough with the over thinking. Perhaps you have too much free time? Time to get back to work or join a club or somethin... (read in full...)
Some like it rough.....
Q. I have been seeing this girl for awhile (6 months) and we have some great times in and out of the sack. The other night, we were partying and she made the comment,"I like it rough too as long as their is no pain". I have never been rough, to women. ...
A. 28 March 2013: well two things come to mind.
1 gently pull her hair GENTLY!!! Which means enough to move her head back but not enough to jerk it back.
And use a soft scarf to tie her up or blindfold her.
But better advice than that is to talk to her a... (read in full...)
Why do women treat nice guys badly?
Q. hi, to all you women who say you want to meet a nice guy, but when you do, you treat him like sh.t, but a bad guy comes around you fall madly in love, you all say thats not true, but think about it,a nice guy you know what hes going to say, what hes ...
A. 28 March 2013: WOW!!!
This is a really great discussion. It really is the best thing about DearCupid that we can here the point of views of guys and girls.
Several posts have made me rethink my original thoughts on this topic.
But to answer you: Its a myt... (read in full...)
How to get many answers to your question.
Q. So many times folks submit good questions but, get few answers. It's very frustrating to have an important topic you need advice on and not be able to get it. While talking with friends is easy to get to what you need, asking in written form can...
A. 12 December 2012: I would just prefer people to get to the point. Leave your life story for the autobiography.... (read in full...)
The need to be responsible when responding to posts
Q. When the Aunts and Uncles provide an answer to peoples problems its sometimes hard to remember that the writers are often heartbroken. When you read the same situation arising repeatedly its easy to think 'here we go again'. Its easy to think th...
A. 12 December 2012: Yes that is true.
But some people really need a swift kick to get them walking in the right direction... (read in full...)
I gave him my number, didn't hear from him. He said I gave him the wrong number and now I'm not hearing from him again.
Q. I just started a new job where the building was having major renovations and met one of the guys doing it - he will not be working with me permanently. He is extremely attractive so naturally spent lots of time ogling him! Which seemed to be a ...
A. 12 December 2012: He isn't interested, but doesn't want to be rude. Take the hint already.... (read in full...)
Why did he end it? I am confused!
Q. Hi everyone, I have been feeling incredibly confused and feel that I need some advice before I can let this go.. Im 29 and the guy in question is 26.. we dated for only 3 weeks. He is quite an introvert and definitely not the player type. The...
A. 12 December 2012: Id forget him, hes a looser.... (read in full...)
I've never been in a relationship, before, but there is a girl I want to ask out. Advice Please!
Q. Hi i have a problem im a sophmore in high school that has never been in a real relationship ( sadly never even kissed a girl) but there is a girl in my biology class that i get my mind off of but there are two problems we hardly ever talk,she is a ...
A. 12 December 2012: Lets be honest here.
Firstly figure out how to be around her more, make friends with her friends etc.
Smile at her and talk to her as much as you can, then suggest doing things together (movies and such)
good luck... (read in full...)
First love questions
Q. Hi everyone :) You're probably going to think this is a stupid question but Im in love for the first time and im so so happy. But sometimes I feel a bit too happy and then i get freaked out because im so young (only 18) and i'll be going to uni soon...
A. 12 December 2012: Just slow yourself down, enjoy it. Spend time with him, but don't neglect your friends.
You will be fine... (read in full...)
What goes through a man's mind when he watches porn?
Q. Can some actually explain to us women what happens when watching porn? Does it make the man feel like he is having sex with the woman on the screen? Apparently I am told they are not watching it to pretend they are the man in the video. I am ...
A. 12 December 2012: Nothing goes through a man's mind while he watches porn.
I've been told that women watch sad movies, because they need an emotional release.
Well Men watch porn for a sexual release. That's pretty much it. I doubt the guys can even remember wh... (read in full...)
I want a boyfriend.....
Q. Hey, I'm 15, and I want a boyfriend. I don't want any of that "you're too young" sh*t. Just give me nice answers :). Ok, so I'm home-schooled, and I only know 3-4 guys, one's Wayy too young (he's like 10), one likes me but just as a friend (which I...
A. 19 July 2012: Its fine. You need to look at expanding you social circle. Think about where you go out for fun ans see if you can try new things.... (read in full...)
She's hot and sexy. Yet I'm a little confused about my own feelings for my girlfriend. Please help me!
Q. I need advice. I could be quite jealous with my girlfriend. She's really hot and has a really sexy body. However, when when i fantasize about her, of other man touching her, looking at her, and even having sex with her I get way tooo turned on. ...
A. 2 June 2012: nothing wrong with fantasies. Just keep them fantasies... (read in full...)
I'm over eating and trying my parents alcohol as a solution. Could it be depression doing this to me?.
Q. Hiya everyone, I'm feeling a little bit worried about myself recently as I've been feeling really down and miserable for no reason. I'm 16 and thought it was just my hormones but since I was 14 going on 15 I have always felt a little bit down and...
A. 2 June 2012: Depression is very serous. I am suffering it as I write this. And I have to say you are better than I was at your age. I was in denial.
Now at age 33, I am getting counciling and feeling much better. Everyone I talk to always says that I look dif... (read in full...)
He has forbidden me to kiss him. He will not speak to me. What should I do?
Q. I'm a female 21 year old medical student.. i love my lecturer who is a doctor and married also.. i have some different feelings for him. I want to see him all the time..i want to spend a lot of time with him. once i came to his clinic and told ...
A. 2 June 2012: you can only loose in this situation, let yourself get over it... (read in full...)
Is it normal for women to only like one night stands?
Q. Hi Just after some opinions really. I know we hear a lot about blokes liking one night stands then losing interest, but I seem to be the female equivilant. I am so happy in my life right now in all ways, and I love being single. Yet I also love ...
A. 2 June 2012: There is nothing wrong with swinging while you are single, just watch out for STD's.
When you are in a relationship however........ (read in full...)
Boyfriend cheated - What should I do?
Q. Hi, I've been with my boyfriend for 14 months and I've just found out that when he went to south africa in november for a month he kissed some girl who was friends with the family he was living with. I found out because he asked me to print so...
A. 1 June 2012: I always end the relationship, no matter the reason.... (read in full...)
I'm from a conservative family and in love with my cousin
Q. I am 17 years old without a boyfriend. My family is conservative. I am in love with my cousin and i don't have any hint whether he has any feelings for me or not. First it started with a crush i spent 5 years like this n now i m head over heels in ...
A. 1 June 2012: its time for you to get out and meet some new people.
This sort of thing always happenes when you isolate yourself.... (read in full...)
My ex told me I could either tell the guy myself or he would send the picture.
Q. So I made a horrible decision to have intercourse with my ex...for the last time like 3 days ago..after I met a new guy. My ex was stupid and took pictures of me. He then later found out that I was talking to this new guy. So now he said he's going ...
A. 1 June 2012: firstly, dont let people take pictures of you having sex..ever.
Secondly ditch the ex... (read in full...)
Is it alright to slip a guy your number in class?
Q. I'm not a social butterfly I'm a little shy because I don't know how to start a conversation most of the time. Anyhow I keep catching this guy in my class checking me out usually I'd see him out of the corner of my eye. Until recently I caught him ...
A. 1 June 2012: Wanna say yes. But before that try the "bump into" trick. Which is you walk into him and make it seem like an accident. When he asks if your ok, your in.... (read in full...)
This guy is trying to destroy my relationship!
Q. Hello people I have a really big problem that has been stressing me out lately. My girlfriend has recently gotten a job but all of her friends are guys and I am ok with that but the real problem is that every single one of them tries to have he...
A. 24 May 2012: This is pretty common in the workplace, I flirted with pretty much every girl I worked with, but was only looking at my GF.
So I wouldnt read too much into it, they are just having a laugh.
As for this guy, yes thats too far. Confront him. Ma... (read in full...)
I really want our kids to have my last name!
Q. I imagine this question is going to spark a lot of controversy.Me and my fiance have been talking about kids lately. Why I have no idea. But she keeps saying about the kids have her last name. but she has already said that when we get married she is ...
A. 17 May 2012: Insist, I did. My daughter has my last name... (read in full...)
What is the average age when a man feels ready to settle down?
Q. Hi this is just a quick question. I was talking to a male friend recently and he mentioned an average age that men feel ready to settle down. I was just wondering what is a mans average age to settle down thanks ...
A. 17 May 2012: Prob around 28yrs old.
We believe in having money and a good foundation first and want a few years to go crazy before we play house you see.... (read in full...)
Should I still date him even though he is going to have a kid and a lot of drama?
Q. Alright so here is my story. About a month ago I met a guy who wasn't my type, and is 9 years older than me. He is 28 and i'm 19 almost 20. Despite me not thinking anything would happen between us we had good conversation. A coffee date turned into ...
A. 16 May 2012: Short answer...no... (read in full...)
Isn't it too early to have sex?
Q. Hello! I met this guy online. We hung out 3 times so far and we had such an amazing time. We text and chat it up all the time... The 3rd time we hung out, there was so much sexual tension between us so we ended up making out and touching each others ...
A. 16 May 2012: Sex happens when it happenes. No need to rush it. If you are ready it will be special. If you rush it will be functional at best.
Alot of people make the mistake of rushing thier relationships, just relax and enjoy spending time with him.
... (read in full...)
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