New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*oo's Mum agony aunt

*oo's Mum

New Zealand  (Female   XML/RSS

Like what she writes?
... Add *oo's Mum to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *oo's Mum a private message

*oo's Mum's Ratings
Excellent71%
Average10%
Poor19%
< Prev1234567891011Next > [30 pages, 1149 answers]

My boyfriend thinks I still have a thing for my ex

Q.   I am a 40-something woman dating a 40-something man for over a year. I have been divorced for 6 years and have done a little dating, but have only had one serious relationship before my current boyfriend. I met my ex husband just after high school ...

A.   20 April 2012: Firstly I think your ex set out to deliberately hurt you by telling you that he didn't want you and to me that shows that he has some feelings for you still. I'm not saying he's in love with you or anything but if he truly saw the relationship as ... (read in full...)

I am having a really hard time adjustting to Americans.

Q.   Ok so I know this is going to upset a few people and I am sorry but I really need some advice. So 4 months ago I was transferred from my office in Melbourne Australia to New York. I didn't really have a choice my work moved my role here so if ...

A.   19 April 2012: lsunshine, vegemite rocks. It's delicious on a cream cracker with butter underneath. Yummy! Salty and savoury.... (read in full...)

Should I kiss this guy I've been flirting with?

Q.   Hi everyone! So there's this boy I've been flirting with for about 6 months now and he asked me to go on a date on Friday. Well, it's not actually a date, it's just that he wants to make it up for me because I've invited him to places many time...

A.   18 April 2012: Go with your instincts. If you feel like kissing him on the date then kiss him. If you don't then don't.... (read in full...)

I can't stop being jealous of his exes

Q.   Why do i feel so jealous of his exes? I have been with my bf for 2 years. I know i shouldnt but i cant help myself. One ex is mother of his children and the other is one that stayed good friends with him (he did seem to be infatuated with this girl) ...

A.   18 April 2012: You said it! You do need to stop being so paranoid. You are going to kill this relationship with your jealousy. You need to get it into your head that he's with you now. The ex's are in the past and we all have a past even you.... (read in full...)

My girlfriend's mom is way too dominating

Q.   I have been dating the most amazing girl for the past 2 years. I know she is the one I want to spend my life with but there are several issues I cannot seem to overcome. Her mom seems very possessive of her and controlling. example she lies to her ...

A.   18 April 2012: You have to talk to her about this and tell her what you've told us. All the best I hope it works out for you.... (read in full...)

How is it possible to find out the cause of my husband's impotence?

Q.   How is it possible to find out the cause, of my husband's impotence? He is unable to maintain an erection, and he says due to this he lost his sexual desire. So now, he has erectile dysfunction, and total loss of sexual desire at the last few ...

A.   18 April 2012: Has something else happened in is life to crush the spark. E.g has work fallen to pieces, has he lost a family member or something else devastating? Maybe he's feeling so hopeless about life that it's killing the desire to be intimate with you ... (read in full...)

Do impersonal sex and lack of intimacy cause depression?

Q.   So about 2 years ago i became the roommate of a now 29 year old woman who is beautiful by all accounts. Men are constantly flocking to her. She is charming too, very magnetic personality. Except she has never had a real boyfriend. Why? She prefers ...

A.   18 April 2012: I would venture a guess that it's the depression that makes her not want an intimate relationship. It kinda sounds like she's searching for something to help take away her bad feelings and is looking for it in the wrong places.... (read in full...)

I am having a really hard time adjustting to Americans.

Q.   Ok so I know this is going to upset a few people and I am sorry but I really need some advice. So 4 months ago I was transferred from my office in Melbourne Australia to New York. I didn't really have a choice my work moved my role here so if ...

A.   18 April 2012: It's always hard to move away and start afresh somewhere and when you throw in a new country and culture to that mix it's almost impossible. You are doing so well to ahve done what you have done and I take my hat off to you. I'm sure that once you ... (read in full...)

Should I be worried about my friend? She seems very down all the time

Q.   Hi. I'm not asking about a romantic thing. It's more of a concern for a friend, however. I'm a little worried, about this one girl. She's very dear to me. Thing is, she's very down. I think she had lost a friend a year ago. (He just didn't wish...

A.   15 April 2012: All you can do is be there for her if she needs to talk.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend fantasizes and approaches someone I know.. is it ok?

Q.   My boyfriend who has two kids with two different women is very charming and affectionate. I accepted the fact of his past (which is no easy for women). However, now I am finding that he write fantasies with my zumba instructor. I stopped going to ...

A.   15 April 2012: He is way out of line here. It's one thing to fantasise about someone but to then start injecting yourself into that person's orbit and write stuff down about it is not ok. He is totally disrepecting your relationship by doing this.... (read in full...)

What could be going on between my brother and this woman?

Q.   My much older brother and I know this girl for several years. Ever since he took control of our social club, he started to change. He use to be nice to everyone, especially her. But now, he acts uneasy around her. Ignores her and unconcerned about ...

A.   12 April 2012: It's really lovely that you care so much about your brother but it's really none of your business what is going on, it's between him and her.... (read in full...)

Is there a way to get this guy more comitted to dating?

Q.   I started talking to a guy back in december from the an online dating site. He is actually a pretty nice guy and the type i would want to date. We went out once in january and it was a pretty good date..we met for a drink and grabbed a bite t...

A.   12 April 2012: With that kind of life schedule it's a wonder he has time to sleep or eat! Seriously though I would ask him straight out "Listen I really like you so are you interested or am I wasting my time with you?" ... (read in full...)

Why did I like him but now I hate him?

Q.   I am really confused.. I used to like this guy but felt like he doesn't feel the same way about me. Few months ago my friend tells me that "the guy" told her that he loves me .. now he talks to me on facebook for hours at night and sends me texts he ...

A.   12 April 2012: Hate is the flip side of love. When you hate someone you still have deep feeling for them or otherwise you wouldn't even think about them. I hope this makes sense.... (read in full...)

Could she be shy? Or just not interested?

Q.   There is this girl that I have been in love with since Kindergarten but I don't think she feels the same way. We've known each other forever and I think she just wants to be friends. Or at least never thought of me that way. She is a bit shy and ...

A.   12 April 2012: You have to be really brave and ask her if she would like your friendship to be more. Once you've asked and gained an answer you wont have to wonder and torture yourself anymore. Good luck. Blunt is the best option.... (read in full...)

Why do some girls look hot smoking and others don't?

Q.   Why is it some girls can look sexy when they smoke and others just look chavvy and it's a turn off? When i'm out I see girls smoking all the time, but I don't like smokers I find them disgusting (the smoking). And it makes even the most beautiful ...

A.   12 April 2012: I personally think smoking makes everyone look cheap. It's not a good look for anyone. Not to mention the stupidity of smoking.... (read in full...)

Should I press charges because she uploaded a photo of us on facebook?

Q.   Hi. I'm new, here. Last week, I have had a photograph of me with a female friend. I thought she would NOT post the photograph on the internet. However, just yesterday, I check her Facebook, just to see her photo album, as she mentionned a nea...

A.   12 April 2012: Chuck I understand where you are coming from here but unfortunately since you only assumed she would not put it on and didn't expressly say not to I'm not sure what your chances would be on suing her. I think the best course of action would be to ... (read in full...)

The man I met on an online site is still talking/possibly meeting with other women

Q.   I recently met a lovely man on a dating website, we met up and things went very well. He is 20 years older than myself and is divorced with a son. We have being seeing each other for about 8 weeks. I stay round his house 3- 4 times a week and we get ...

A.   12 April 2012: What a cheek he has telling you you are not to see anyone else and he's still carrying on. You need to work out some kind of sting operation here. Txt the other women and get her in on it too.... (read in full...)

My g/f sees a man once and week and he pays her bills. Do I believe her that there is nothing sexual?

Q.   I got a girlfriend that sees a man once week and he pays her bills. and she says all they do is go out to eat and be his friend, but she swears on her kids life they dont do anything sexual. she says she loves me and i need to stop worrying about ...

A.   12 April 2012: Why on earth is he paying her bills? There's no way he would do this without something in return. I'm not suggesting it's a sexual thing but he's getting something in return for paying those bills. Sounds weird to me.... (read in full...)

The girl I like is living with her ex who is a friend of mine!

Q.   Hi, I've been seeing this girl off and on for about 5 months. We were really intense when we first met - still are in a way. Recently we met up and she told me that she was in a open relationship with her ex last time we met she told me she didn't ...

A.   12 April 2012: I would be very careful of this girl if I were you. She is treating your friend like dirt. Tell her you are not interested in a relationship unless she makes a clean break with your friend and moves out. She sounds like a user to me.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has not added me on facebook, should I be worried?

Q.   Hi. Please help. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months and have agreed to be in a relationship. However, one thing is bothering me. He has not added me to his friends on Facebook. Should I be worried?...

A.   4 April 2012: To anon: yes I agree with you that it is a big deal that he drops your hand when he enters a bar but don't automatically assume that it's because he doesn't want to flaunt you. Maybe he's shy about Public Displays of Affection. If I were in your ... (read in full...)

Touchy-Feely Fiance

Q.   I have had an affection struggle since the beginning of my relationship. Or, I suppose it's a struggle. Sometimes I don't think it is. My fiance and I have been together for three years. Since the beginning, it feels like he never wants to stop hu...

A.   4 April 2012: Hmmm I wonder why your Dad is that over the top about affection? Something has happened to him to make him feel this way about affection. He is undoubtably the reason you feel uncomfortable about it. Don't let your Dad's views shape your ... (read in full...)

Is it wrong to spank your kids?

Q.   My mother thinks im cruel because i spank my two year old. I am not ashamed that i do. I only spank him on the rump when hes doing something he knows he shouldnt do. For instance getting into the trash, taking silverware out of the dishwasher, ...

A.   3 April 2012: I personally don't agree with it however I have smacked mine on the odd occasion. Mine are older now and frequently hit each other and it struck me that smacking them for hitting each other was an extremely mixed message. I was telling them not to ... (read in full...)

How do I uninvite a former friend to my wedding?

Q.   Hello everyone. I feel really down from time to time because of this. Right now I'm in a loving relationship, and I could not ask for anything more. He's the one for me, and I'm the one for him. There's no question about it. However, before h...

A.   3 April 2012: I agree with wisdom. A letter is a great way to tell her not to come. What a cow!... (read in full...)

Touchy-Feely Fiance

Q.   I have had an affection struggle since the beginning of my relationship. Or, I suppose it's a struggle. Sometimes I don't think it is. My fiance and I have been together for three years. Since the beginning, it feels like he never wants to stop hu...

A.   3 April 2012: No you are not wrong. There are people who love lots of hugs and people who can survive on one hug a day or less. (I am in that former category). He really needs to accept that you are just not as touchy feely as him and make peace with it. You ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has not added me on facebook, should I be worried?

Q.   Hi. Please help. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a few months and have agreed to be in a relationship. However, one thing is bothering me. He has not added me to his friends on Facebook. Should I be worried?...

A.   3 April 2012: I think Facebook is the single biggest relationship destroyer on the planet! Definately keep any private stuff off it.... (read in full...)

Am I being immature by being affectionate in public, or is he being a poor boyfriend by being ashamed of me?

Q.   Hi. My name is Leony, and my boyfriend's name is Roman. Roman and I ride the school bus together. When we're on our way to school, I like giving him little kisses almost all the while. Just yesterday, Roman told me that he thinks its immature if I'm ...

A.   3 April 2012: Some people (like you) like Public Displays of Affection and some people (your BF) do not like it and prefer to keep it private. You both need to accept each other's point of view and find a way to compromise that makes you both happy. E.g. maybe ... (read in full...)

I'm worried that by not having a girlfriend I'd be "missing out" on certain life experiences (I'm still a virgin) that I should be having around my age

Q.   I'm 21 and I've never had a girlfriend before. I don't usually have a problem with this because a lot of my close friends are either single or in mediocre relationships. I've dated a few girls last year but I didn't have any real feelings for them ...

A.   3 April 2012: 1. No 2. I married a guy who hadn't dated much and I love him so much. 3. No. How do you know other people are successful. Just because they are in a relationship doesn't mean they are any happier than you. 4. Dating will get easier when you rel... (read in full...)

I was the other woman and got dumped. How do I move on?

Q.   hi, just joined this site, as i read alot of stories about being the OW. i too was the OW, for 2 years, and stupidly believed he would leave his partner, well, i was the one he dumped after she found out about us, and obviously he denied everythi...

A.   3 April 2012: You simply have to make yourself get up every day and make the effort and throw yourself into life. Put makeup and and nice clothes and concentrate on doing things for you. No one else can do this for you. Just find a way to get through every day ... (read in full...)

Not making a "quota" system. How much sex per week?

Q.   I'm tired of asking the wife and keep getting turned down for sex. We have sex 1-2 per month, I get a BJ approx. 2 times per month. Again, i am not keeping score. I know EVERYONE is different. But, is that something to complain about?...

A.   3 April 2012: Have you ever read the book "Love Languages?" She isn't getting her emotional tank filled by you so isn't that interested in sex. You have to find out what constitues love for her. "Love Languages" will help you figure it out. E.g I love it when ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend is a virgin and wants to have sex. Advice to make her first time special?

Q.   Hi my girlfriend recently said to me that she felt she was ready to have sex. She is a virgin while I am not so I was really excited. The problem is I've never had sex with a virgin before and I am really nervous about being her first. I mean I love ...

A.   4 March 2012: Your post is so lovely until the last sentence which is a bit out of touch with the rest of it :-) Just keep asking her what she likes and you will be fine. I think it's so sweet you are concerned about making it great for her and so I have no worr... (read in full...)

He's leaving his girlfriend, what should I do?

Q.   I've been hanging out with a co-worker friend of mine who is a guy 2 months ago. And we've got very attached to eachother, but the thing is that he has a girlfriend and a child with her. His girlfriend is bipolar with a very bad temper. He's told ...

A.   23 February 2012: If I were in your shoes I would sit back and wait to see what develops. You both know that there is feeling there so wait until he sorts his life out and then see what happens.... (read in full...)

I am confused, what is really going on with me and my friend?

Q.   I knew this guy since high school. He tells me everything about his relationships. He told me that I am his best friend and then ask me question about women and If I know it I would tell him. He calls his self liking me. It nothing but a friend ...

A.   23 February 2012: He likes you. You need to ask him straight out if he wants your friendship to be taken up a level.... (read in full...)

I'm not sure I trust my ex when he says he isn't using drugs anymore, we have a 10 year old I want to keep safe!

Q.   Hi, new here. Question about addiction. My ex-boyfriend and the father of my 10 year old had, when we were together, a big drug problem. We split up 3 years ago. He used to smoke cannabis every day (had 'come downs' when he couldnt get any)...

A.   23 February 2012: I can see where you are coming from with your worry here but he does have a right to see his son. If you son knows he can talk to you about anything I'm sure he will tell you if he's feeling uncomfortable about being with his Dad. I wonder if you ... (read in full...)

I wish my B/f saw me as one of those ideal girls in dude movies with "big boobs/skinny waist/big butt/slim thighs", instead of the cute girl next door

Q.   I always feel so insecure about my body, it's so stupid... I even get really nervous and anxious when watching movies with my boyfriend, especially the type of "dude" movies where lots of perfect boobs are shown. I never say anything in front of ...

A.   23 February 2012: Just because he has commented about girls with big boobs and small thighs doesn't mean that that's the type of girl he craves. He's with you so he obviously finds you attractive and hot or why would he bother sticking round. The fact is that most ... (read in full...)

A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?

Q.   Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...

A.   7 February 2012: I honestly don't think you need to say you are a virgin to anyone even the person you choose to loose it with. Just get on and do it and don't worry about having to admit it to anyone. At the end of the day this is your business and no one else ... (read in full...)

After six months my boyfriend still hasn't told his new friends I even exist

Q.   My extremely introverted boyfriend went away to teachers college for 6 months to make some friends. He did it! Is great friends with his housemate and a few other people he met from school. Anyway, the time has come for me to meet him up there so we ...

A.   28 January 2012: I'm thinking he didn't just go to teachers college to make new friends I'm sure the primary reason was to get his teaching degree, No? I understand that you are hurt by this because your nature dictates that you would tell the world about him but ... (read in full...)

Not enough sex in this marriage

Q.   I love my wife. We have a great relationship, but no were near enough sex. I personally am up for it anytime anyplace. She also complains about not enough sex, but never initiates it. How can I change these things? ...

A.   28 January 2012: Sorry dude but you are going to have to be the initiator at all times. She may feel too shy to do it (this is a common feeling for women). The fact that she is complaining about not getting enough too is a big signal that she is also up for it ... (read in full...)

Has my husband's love for me faded?

Q.   hi guys. my husband has been leaving on his own outside the country. recently i joined him there. but he doesnt seem happy to be with me. apparently its an isolated place with mostly men there. he has become so harsh with me. always finding fault ...

A.   28 January 2012: Honestly I would go home. If he wont listen to you when you try to tell him why you are going home then write him a letter and leave it for him to read when you are gone telling him how his behaviour is making you feel. The fact that he aske... (read in full...)

My husband has joined an online dating site

Q.   My husband has joined a sex dating site. Should I be worried. Or is it harmless fun?? ...

A.   28 January 2012: Make a fake profile and arrange to meet him and then see how he reacts. This is not good.... (read in full...)

She wants me to have sex with someone else before we get married. What should I do?

Q.   I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. It all started with “what would you do if..” questions. A few questions in, it was my turn: Me: “What’s the first thing you’d do if we broke up?” Her: “Hmm.. More girl’s nights! What’s the first ...

A.   27 January 2012: Scythe, just for the benefit of people who may not understand our down under slang, "root a bird" means have sex with a girl :-)... (read in full...)

My best friend never seems to have time for me! Should I just forget her and move on with my life?

Q.   OK me and my best friend haven't hung out since the summer I guess because we both have been busy. I am a full time college student and work part time and she is a mother and works full time. Even though we have been busy we have stayed in touch via ...

A.   24 January 2012: Something is going on here and I understand where you are coming from because I have been in a similar situation. My solution was to go and make new friends and start spending time with them. All the best I know how much this hurts.... (read in full...)

She wants me to have sex with someone else before we get married. What should I do?

Q.   I’ll try to keep this as short as possible. It all started with “what would you do if..” questions. A few questions in, it was my turn: Me: “What’s the first thing you’d do if we broke up?” Her: “Hmm.. More girl’s nights! What’s the first ...

A.   23 January 2012: I say don't do it. It's a very weird thing for her to ask of you even given the history. Two wrongs don't make a right.... (read in full...)

A male virgin and a much younger and more experienced girl - potential humiliation or a great opportunity?

Q.   Hello! This isn't the first time I've asked a question that is in some way related to this topic, but I hope it will be the last! First, some important background information. Somehow I have managed to get to the grand old age of 27 while re...

A.   8 January 2012: I don't understand people who hassle virgins! Yay you well done for sticking to your guns and waiting for the right girl. My suggestion is to go to the library and get "The Joy of Sex" and some other such books and read up a storm. When the night ... (read in full...)

*oo's Mum's friends

These are mutual friends, so *oo's Mum has added them and they have added *oo's Mum!

*problems* agony aunt*problems*
ashi1234 agony auntashi1234
Ayan Ganguly agony auntAyan Ganguly
ayeshaH agony auntayeshaH
BrownWolf agony auntBrownWolf
bruce lee agony auntbruce lee
candygirl_iraq agony auntcandygirl_iraq
CaringGuy agony auntCaringGuy
chigirl agony auntchigirl
cmarieky agony auntcmarieky
DenimandLace44 agony auntDenimandLace44
der_zyniker agony auntder_zyniker
eyeswideopen agony aunteyeswideopen
kc-dee agony auntkc-dee
Lasterloh agony auntLasterloh
lillylightly agony auntlillylightly
LoveIsStrongerThanPride agony auntLoveIsStrongerThanPride
Mafe agony auntMafe
Nannysgirl agony auntNannysgirl
ojii onaze agony auntojii onaze
PinkRose agony auntPinkRose
PLAYFUL agony auntPLAYFUL
RoseLovex agony auntRoseLovex
shawtielove13 agony auntshawtielove13
skullmaster333 agony auntskullmaster333
tink29 agony aunttink29
Tisha-1 agony auntTisha-1
Trinklett agony auntTrinklett
Y_v agony auntY_v

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.124988899995515!