New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login244945 questions, 1084256 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*ephistophiles agony aunt

*ephistophiles

Holy See (Vatican City State)  (Male   XML/RSS

Like what he writes?
... Add *ephistophiles to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *ephistophiles a private message

*ephistophiles's Ratings
Excellent58%
Average9%
Poor33%
*ephistophiles's profile:

I feel that I am qualified to help people, as I am responsible for most of your sins. However after reading this site I must say I am a little flattered that sooooooooo many of you have chosen to have me as your spiritual leader. I certainly shall not be lonely in my twilight years. Lots of company a comin' my way.

I am still single, and looking for that special lady who shares a penchant for red hot pokers and sinner's rectums.

Well off for a round of golf with Adolf now, so keep up the "good" work everyone and sin like there's no tomorrow.

Yours in damnation.

Mephistophiles, aka Satan

Why does my boyfriend feel the need to lie or cover up the fact that he looks at porn when I know he does?

Q.   Why does my boyfriend feel the need to lie or cover up the fact that he looks at porn? I was gone for 4 hours one day and when I came home he was gone and I know that I shouldn't do this and it's wrong of me to look at his computer but under hi...

A.   2 June 2008: I am really failing by the looks of it. I was hoping that all of your boyfriends would have progressed onto full blown affairs by now, but alas they have just contented themselves with looking at porn. All that work of mine down the drain. I am ... (read in full...)

I was happy sleeping with other men to please my husband, but he doesn't want me to anymore.

Q.   after we had been married about five years, my husband told me he wanted me to have sex with other men and he wanted to watch. i told him i didn't want to, but he begged and begged me to do this and i finally told him i would. he brought home a ...

A.   2 June 2008: Naughty Spawn, I was not dancing, I was tending the fires, and one of the sinners fell out. You wait till you step on your first burning sinner down here and see how you like it. Cher just happened to be playing when it ... (read in full...)

I was happy sleeping with other men to please my husband, but he doesn't want me to anymore.

Q.   after we had been married about five years, my husband told me he wanted me to have sex with other men and he wanted to watch. i told him i didn't want to, but he begged and begged me to do this and i finally told him i would. he brought home a ...

A.   1 June 2008: Anon, I would have to agree with aim, quote "the church always has a prejudiced answer for almost anything. And this is no exception. In a way, your husband's mind has already been brainwashed to be what they want him to be." If you fe... (read in full...)

I changed my mind about giving him oral sex, so he flipped out saying I am playing with him! I'm not!

Q.   hey guys im 15, so i told the boy that im together with in the begining of the week that i wanted to give him head. then i thought about it and i dont want to rush things and be so easy. i told him that today cause i am seeing him later. he FLIPPED ...

A.   1 June 2008: Sooooooo, how about if he promised you something or other then backed out of it????? I am not advocating that you should have to perform a sexual act for this boy, on command; however maybe this is a lesson in ensuring you brai... (read in full...)

I ended my affair with the family friend but he still pursues me! I'm afraid our infidelity will come out!

Q.   I cheated on my husband with a family friend. Husband does not know.I broke it off, but he won't let me be. He is persuing the family friendship in an effort to stay close to me. He doesn't care whether our spouses find out. We each have three kids. ...

A.   31 May 2008: Well, well, well, If it isn't my oldest of faithful servants, Infidelity. He would have to be hardest working of all my workers. The best thing about this worker is that he often leaves all and sundry between rock and a hard... (read in full...)

I slept with my wife's sister and best friend, one is now pregnant...what can I do?

Q.   Hi all This is all a complete mess!!! I slept with both my wifes sister and her best friend and dont know what i can do now. They both came onto me and are so hot that i could not resist either of them... The problem i have now is t...

A.   31 May 2008: Ahhh, That's some good work right there. Not only are you a fantastic adulterer, you are quite silly as well to think that you will have no attachment to this child when it is born, or that the mother will keep with the whole "it's my h... (read in full...)

If I love my boyfriend why do I feel like cheating on him when the occasion rises??

Q.   why is it that i love my boyfriend and i cant seem to live without him but when ever i notice a new guy i feel like cheating i feel like i wanna start something new with someone else.....

A.   29 May 2008: Actually Laura, it is not a black angel, it is me, yes good old Satan. I sooooooo love being omnipotent . Cocoa, you sound entirely committed to your relationship. You need to decide if it truly what you want or if you are just looking for a wa... (read in full...)

I'm 23 and my 15 year old nephew got me pregnant!

Q.   Im 23 and my 15 year old nephew impregnated me! I want to keep the baby because I love him but he tells me he cant. Im so confused I love him and Ill love our child just as much. Advice?...

A.   29 May 2008: To quote Laura, "Why don't people here stop playing and acting like GOD with their high moral judgments?" Yes, well we all know how you know who, feels about the whole "false God" thing don't we??? I was pondering this very problem last night an... (read in full...)

Problems in my polyamorous relationship with one partner. I need advice.

Q.   Hi can anyone help me? Im in a polyamory relationship, but my one partner is driving me to dispair. He thinks that because i were with him 1st he should take priority over my other lover. His jelousy is pushing us apart not bringing us clos...

A.   29 May 2008: Anon, I look forward to seeing soon. Sorry allow me to introduce myself, I am the antichrist, and I must say that incestuous little minx's such as yourself are excellent for keeping the fires of hell burning. Please keep up the good wor... (read in full...)

*ephistophiles's friends

These are mutual friends, so *ephistophiles has added them and they have added *ephistophiles!

Aeval agony auntAeval
Devil Spawn agony auntDevil Spawn

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.0937697000044864!