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*ark1978

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Online dating guide - with really good advice for you

This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

28 June 2014: So why use Internet Dating? Over the last few years Internet Datings popularity has soared! There are now millions of us looking for love, romance and friendship online. Like so many aspects of life - shopping, banking, communicating with frie...

< Prev56789101112131415Next > [15 pages, 575 answers]

What kind of man lies like that?

Q.   I have been seeing a guy for the last couple of years. The connection seemed to be undeniable. He committed to me giving me an expensive piece of jewelry. We connected on FB. After little time, I realized that the immense majority of his friends ...

A.   18 July 2014: DONT respond. Ignore him completely. Any response will feed his appetite further. Don't try to rationalize, persuade, discuss or communicate in anyway, shape or form. Block his emails, or change your email address. Speak to your employer and tell... (read in full...)

Should I trust my own opinions about my new manager, or believe what the secretary says about her?

Q.   I recently started a new job (office work). The manager is nice at a glance. She is a bit picky and micromanages but what manager doesn't? Anyway there is a secretary working here and from day 1 she has tried to misguide my opinion about my mana...

A.   4 June 2014: Sounds more likely that the person telling you all this is the suspect one. Perhaps she is jealous, sees you as a threat to her position or maybe doesn't like not being the centre of attention from the manager now. You should tell her that you... (read in full...)

Should I trust my own opinions about my new manager, or believe what the secretary says about her?

Q.   I recently started a new job (office work). The manager is nice at a glance. She is a bit picky and micromanages but what manager doesn't? Anyway there is a secretary working here and from day 1 she has tried to misguide my opinion about my mana...

A.   4 June 2014: Sounds more likely that the person telling you all this is the suspect one. Perhaps she is jealous, sees you as a threat to her position or maybe doesn't like not being the centre of attention from the manager now. You should tell her that you... (read in full...)

I either want her back or to treat her as an acquaintance

Q.   This past Thursday I was dumped my girlfriend who also happens to be a co-worker. I had left a rose outside her door the previous day, and I knew by her lukewarm response that she had already made up her mind to end the relationship. I was prepared ...

A.   4 June 2014: Both of the options you are considering involve trying to win her back, but it sounds as if it has already reached a conclusion. Sorry but I think you need to accept that she is no longer wanting to be with you. "should I slowly become her "fri... (read in full...)

Friend with benefits has an ex visiting from overseas and told me not to contact him or visit him while she's here! What should I do?

Q.   I have been seeing and sleeping with a man for just over 9 months now. Just out of the blue, he told me his ex from the USA is coming over to stay with him for a month. First he said it was without warning, and then his story changed, saying it was ...

A.   4 June 2014: Hello, Whoooo there! Go round and tell his ex what exactly? That her EX boyfriend/husband, whom he is split from, and living in another continent too, has been having casual sex with you? He has every right to sleep with you or whomever he pleas... (read in full...)

Pregnant from a fling -- how do I tell him?

Q.   I feel like I just made a huge mistake and I'm about to pay for it forever. I don't need any judgey comments, I just need guidance. Please, help me! I met a slightly older, thankfully SINGLE man two months ago and got pregnant by him after just one ...

A.   4 June 2014: Hello, I'm sorry you are in this situation. I think you should plan, and indeed expect, that this guy will deny the whole thing and try and walk away. Sorry to be blunt, but you cannot just walk away from this, he can. Or at least try to. He is yo... (read in full...)

Co worker... Flirting?

Q.   Hi all, I'm new here anyway I started a new job around a month ago and since I have a co worker who always stares at me I always catch him in the corner of my eye I pretend I havnt noticed anyway he's always sort of touches my arm and try's to make ...

A.   4 June 2014: Hello, Being touchy feely is crossing a line and shows he is either the kind of person who is naïve to modern, politically correct workplaces (and is likely to find someone making a complaint about his inappropriate behaviours), or he knows fu... (read in full...)

Should I just skip going to his country now after his response?

Q.   What would you do in this situation? I met this cute guy on my last trip last year to a foreign country. I was by myself and I went to this bar. He owns it. We started talking and he offered to show me around. Was very sweet, but we never were...

A.   3 June 2014: From his behaviour so far, I think maybe you should concentrate on doing your own thing. Scheduling your who trip around him, when he may or may not let you down is a bit of a gamble really. Maybe its something you could discuss with him again an... (read in full...)

We broke up and I can't imagine myself with anyone but her

Q.   Recently my girlfriend of 2 years and I have split up. This is all because of me. I was a jerk to her and didn't appreciate what I had and of course now I realize and of course I want her back.Now I'm only 17 and a junior in high school but I feel ...

A.   3 June 2014: Hi We all go through wheat you are feeling right now. Its part of maturing, growing up, evolving, learning to deal with negative emotions and gaining experience, good and bad, that shapes us. Splitting from our first love is always hard, but its ... (read in full...)

Should I just skip going to his country now after his response?

Q.   What would you do in this situation? I met this cute guy on my last trip last year to a foreign country. I was by myself and I went to this bar. He owns it. We started talking and he offered to show me around. Was very sweet, but we never were...

A.   3 June 2014: Hello, To be straight to the point, I think you need to accept that this was a holiday (vacation) romance a year ago that isn't really going to go anywhere. You both live in different countries, your not sure if he is genuine or genuinely interest... (read in full...)

What kind of man lies like that?

Q.   I have been seeing a guy for the last couple of years. The connection seemed to be undeniable. He committed to me giving me an expensive piece of jewelry. We connected on FB. After little time, I realized that the immense majority of his friends ...

A.   3 June 2014: You just need to get rid, nothing more, nothing less. Its not actually that hard to get someone out of your life ;-) This is guy is like a verruca - he will keep coming back until being removed! And as with any unwanted attachment, warts, ingrowin... (read in full...)

This married guy knows I have a crush on him and he touched and kissed me and said, "lets be casual". What does he mean by that?

Q.   here's this guy a married man 47 yrs old, he's my friend and most of his family members were my friend also. last year i realized i really like him (crush). but i kept it inside me. he's so nice to me and whenever we see each other he always f...

A.   3 June 2014: If this needs explaining at your age then I think you need to wake up for your own good! Sorry to be blunt but come on! He is married, he is twice your age...he is a middle aged man looking for sex with someone behind his wife's back. He is well ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is always broke and using me for money.

Q.   I have a bf and lately i noticed that he was always broke..he borrowed money and doesnt bother in paying..now he uses my phone line and it was cut due to overlimit and up to this time he didnt settle the bill its late for 2 weeks already and the ...

A.   3 June 2014: This guy is using you. You deserve better. Whenever we get used for money, sex, or anything you care to mention, it is because we allow it to happen. The Bank of Bibiella needs to put up the "position Closed" sign and tell him to take a hike. ... (read in full...)

Could this Facebook ad be a scam?

Q.   Hello, i Read an advertisment on Facebook. Regarding a family looking for a caregiver, chef and housekeeper i applied for the job which Is in the Uk. They told me they Will Pay me 1200 monthly and they will pay for m'y ticket and visa, but i need ...

A.   3 June 2014: As a UK resident, I don't know of anyone who would actually have someone do that type of job. It sounds like something out of a 1920s set Keira Knightly film, or the period TV drama Downton Abbey! Im sure that kind of role exists, but very, ve... (read in full...)

I got drunk at a party recently. This sober boy hugged and kissed me. Does this mean he likes me?

Q.   Hi I'm 16 and I got drunk at a small party last week but this sober boy made me feel special he hugged me and held my hand all night he even kissed my head. He said I had to prove I was straight to him and I laughed it off (nothing happened). At ...

A.   3 June 2014: Getting drunk when you are young and at a party is not a great idea. Others may do it, but you need to be careful! A sober lad getting touchy feely with a drunken girl = recipe for getting taken advantage of. ... (read in full...)

Husband wants a threesome, how can I fulfill this sexual experience?

Q.   Hi Aunts and Uncles. I need to know how to go about having a threesome with my husband. First off I am bisexual, so theres no issue with wanting to be with woman sexually. My husband has always wanted to experience a threesome. Its just a fantasy. ...

A.   3 June 2014:  "He says the fun is all about me enjoying it too" Men always say that when they want a threesome, making out you fulfilling His fantasy is some kind of gift to you. This can only end badly, with jealousy, insecurity and resentment after... (read in full...)

How can I calm my fears before I see the Doctor for my appointment with Dr in 2 weeks time?

Q.   Ok so I know everyone on here is going to tell me to see my Dr- I will do in 2 weeks time as that was the soonest appointment but in the mean time I just wanted some advice/ reassurance. I found 2 small pea size lumps on 1 side of my neck -at 1st ...

A.   3 June 2014: ive got one too - found it two days back. Its more likely to be a gland or a cyst. I have a cyst on my chesty also - scared myself to death it was cancer, just a cyst. ... (read in full...)

What kind of man lies like that?

Q.   I have been seeing a guy for the last couple of years. The connection seemed to be undeniable. He committed to me giving me an expensive piece of jewelry. We connected on FB. After little time, I realized that the immense majority of his friends ...

A.   2 June 2014: He can only break you down if you let him. Clearly your co-worker has basically said that he has a reputation - we have all come across his type. You need to block him. Simple. Stop responding to him. Otherwise he will break you down. Mark... (read in full...)

Surely he will feel disappointed that my nipples are not the way he prefers?

Q.   I have a question that may seem so trivial but it's worrying me . The man I am involved with has a thing for and a preference for large nipples. He really prefers them and they turn him on a lot but the problem is I have reasonably sized breasts but ...

A.   2 June 2014: He will LOVE your nipples! They are part of you, so be proud! No pun intended. If he doesn't like your nipples and makes any kind of gesture or comment to that effect, which is highly unlikely, then he isn't the one for you! Mark ... (read in full...)

Telling my best friend that I have feelings for her?

Q.   Hello there, I have this best friend of 5 years whom i had a crush on at the start of our friendship but we had a talk about it and decided just to be friends. i was able to get over her and became best friends (i even dated someone else at ...

A.   2 June 2014: Hello In all honesty I think you have answered your own question here: "i would like to tell her how i feel but i don't think she would return those feelings back and by doing that i would be destroying a GREAT friendship and gained nothing. ... (read in full...)

Is a tumor an STD?

Q.   Hi, my girlfriend of four years found out from a doctor over three weeks ago that she has a tumor in her ear. We were devastated by the news but we're doing the best we can to cope with it. She's already scheduled for a surgery. While sitting ...

A.   2 June 2014: No! There are some sexually transmitted infections than can increase the risk of some types of cancer, usually cervical or womb cancer or similar, but not in the ears. Are you asking because you are concerned she may give this to you? Or because ... (read in full...)

My 17 yr old son met an American girl while gaming online and now her parents are offering to pay for his ticket so he can meet her! I'm scared that he'll never come back!

Q.   Hi Looking for some advice! My 17 yr old son met an American girl while gaming online 4 yrs ago! They have been chatting on fb and Skype since and now he wants to go to America to meet her! Apparently her parents will pay for his ticket!! I have t...

A.   2 June 2014: When you say he might not come back, do you mean as in MISSING rather than not wanting to come home? The issue I have is that "meeting " a girl online, especially on a gaming site which attracts youngsters, inevitably has pitfalls and deceptio... (read in full...)

Boyfriend doesn't seem interested in the pregnancy and he's been talking to his ex

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for over 6 months. We dated for nearly a year back when we were in highschool (9th grade) before he moved. We lost contact for about 5 years. Well I am now 19 weeks pregnant with his child. This will be my first...

A.   2 June 2014: Hi I am sorry you are in this pickle. I do hope your family and friends are being supportive. I don't think your boyfriend is mature enough, committed enough or ready enough for having a baby. He has already left one girl as a single parent, ... (read in full...)

He is my first love!! Please give me some advice

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been close friends and we started dating recently. He is 8 years older than me but I love his personality. He is my ideal boyfriend. We play sports together every week and text each other everyday. He seems really seriously ...

A.   2 June 2014: At 16/17 you are far, far to young and inexperienced to even be thinking about marriage and kids. HE may be ready for that, being older, but you are not. You are at two different stages in life. Him: mid twenties adult, You: legally still a child of ... (read in full...)

Is it wise to play it cool now?

Q.   I fell out with my close male friend eight months ago We got close too soon and as a result became clingy and too emotional and pushed him away Last night I saw him at a friends leaving do He saw me and looked awkward so I just remained calm ...

A.   1 June 2014: Sorry I misread your post. I still stand by my advice though, sounds all a bit awkward to form the basis of anything.... (read in full...)

I want her molester jailed

Q.   I'm 31 and my girlfriend is 20. She is my life and I love her so much and i'd do anything for her. We are together 1year and half . Last night alot of things she told me about a guy who groomed her at 12 years to 14 and i cant get it out of my ...

A.   1 June 2014: Being abused in any capacity has a real stigma attached to it sadly, and for a victim to admit publically that they have been abused takes tremendous strength of character and is a massive leap of faith. The last thing she needs and wants is for her ... (read in full...)

Co-worker found out I have a crush on him

Q.   So I have a little problem. For about 6/7 months, I have had a crush on a co-worker, and now he knows. So it was my birthday today, and we were all at work. I was given a card from all my co-workers and waited until the end of the day to read it....

A.   1 June 2014: I think the person who should be embarrassed is the fool who, clearly still thinking they were in a school playground, tried to embarrass you by shouting silly comments. You should not be mortified! So you fancy someone, what's to be embarras... (read in full...)

Is it wise to play it cool now?

Q.   I fell out with my close male friend eight months ago We got close too soon and as a result became clingy and too emotional and pushed him away Last night I saw him at a friends leaving do He saw me and looked awkward so I just remained calm ...

A.   1 June 2014: Yes play it cool. So cool you have to zip your jacket up to keep warm. He is clearly yet to move on and probably has feelings for you still. Assuming you don't want anything to do with him romantically then I would delete his number, don't reply to ... (read in full...)

What do you think of my poem to my ex?

Q.   Young lady's I sent a poem to an ex, I wrote, just like to know if you think, she would of like it, an she ever has regretted breaking up with me, its been almost two years no contact, this is the only time I did this, she left me to go back to her ...

A.   1 June 2014: Nice but don't sent it. Let me rephrase that: DONT SEND IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DONT SEND IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Two years without contact says it all im afraid. You need to move on like she has. Sorry but writing poems to her won... (read in full...)

Help me win my crush!

Q.   Ok, I've just very recently started at a new, temporary job, and there's a girl there that I'm really keen on, she's 100% GF material, and I'm actually 80% sure that she's keen on me too! Problem is, messing things up with the fairer sex is my ...

A.   1 June 2014: Flo Jack, part of moving on from your struggles with dating is to start chasing SINGLE women, and moving on from those you cannot have. I suspect this girl likes you because you are not like the tough guy, cocky types who are constantly giving i... (read in full...)

Help me win my crush!

Q.   Ok, I've just very recently started at a new, temporary job, and there's a girl there that I'm really keen on, she's 100% GF material, and I'm actually 80% sure that she's keen on me too! Problem is, messing things up with the fairer sex is my ...

A.   31 May 2014: If she wanted to go on a date with you then she would have done so by now. You have asked her twice and given her plenty of encouragement and it has not happened. She should have told you she was spoken for, or at least declined your invitation of ... (read in full...)

I'm done with dating and want no more to do with women!

Q.   I don't even know when to begin...it's like every time I try I somehow get used. My troubles started four girls ago and yet somehow I haven't learned my lesson. Let me tell you about myself; I'm twenty-three, college graduate, and living at home. I ...

A.   31 May 2014: Op you have a real downer on women right now!! I think you need a sense of perspective. Its not like she robbed you blind and stole your kidney ;-) You knew this girl had just split from her boyfriend so why get involved? She was clearly on the r... (read in full...)

Will I just be another notch on his bedpost?

Q.   [Mod note: could you please ask the question you'd like the aunts to answer? Your last comment said you need to be so desperate to be with a man like this so why are you even considering such thing with him? Thanks.] Hi dear agony aunts. Thanks f...

A.   31 May 2014: You will end up hurt by having sex with this man. Generally men can have sex without developing an emotional attachment, women cant. He has made it crystal clear he just wants sex, nothing more. he may of hinted or suggested that could change b... (read in full...)

My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!

Q.   I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...

A.   31 May 2014: Op having read your follow up a few things have jumped out at me. "saying I should just give her a darn good hiding... How could I?" and "she ran out in front of a moving car at 5 I caught her and pulled her back to safety...I still have tha... (read in full...)

Painful breakup and I can't seem to move on, what do I do?

Q.   It's been well over 5 months since we broke up. We were together for 2 years and were childhood friends too so we know each other's deepest corners. We've been through so much and I know in my heart that I will always love him, and I also know that ...

A.   31 May 2014: You are very welcome! Its very easy when we are young to think that our first proper relationship is the be all and end all, and that a two year relationship seems to have been through so much and been so close, and lasted so long. But as we get o... (read in full...)

My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!

Q.   I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...

A.   30 May 2014: Im in a similar situation to your husband in a way OP. My adult brother is aggressive, selfish, goes beserk over the tiniest thing, wants his own way, expects my parents who he lives with to bend over backwards, sulks like a stroppy kid (hes in his ... (read in full...)

Painful breakup and I can't seem to move on, what do I do?

Q.   It's been well over 5 months since we broke up. We were together for 2 years and were childhood friends too so we know each other's deepest corners. We've been through so much and I know in my heart that I will always love him, and I also know that ...

A.   30 May 2014: Hi, You say nothing seems to work in getting over him, but one thing you haven't tried, which is the most sensible in this case, is cutting all contact and allowing yourself the space to move on. You say he hasn't given you a sense of closer, ... (read in full...)

Why is this boy from my primary school class talking to me on FB?

Q.   Ok, im not so sure how to feel, but obviously when you leave primary school everyone adds each other on Facebook, just to keep in contact but really, the outcome is that people from primary don't talk anymore, right? Well, I did confirmation cla...

A.   30 May 2014: hello, We didn't have Facebook in my days of school ;-) I have reached the grand old age of thirty six, phew that's old I almost literally hear you cry. Who randomly adds someone on facebook they barely knew many years earlier? Well I'... (read in full...)

Is cell phone snooping okay?

Q.   Is it okay for someone you are dating to go into your cell phone behind your back and look at text messages you have received and sent to other people?...

A.   30 May 2014: No it shows a lack of trust, and any relationship needs to based on trust, and also shows a lack of respect for privacy. Mark... (read in full...)

My teenage daughter is breaking the family apart!

Q.   I've been married for 10 years and when I met my husband he inherited my 3 children too who were very young at the time, we have also had a child together... I had just left a violent marriage 6 months earlier and we were all still recovering (the ...

A.   30 May 2014: You need to take back control. My brother is 33 and he's the same: lives with my parents who try their best only to be treated like dirt, hurt, used and abused. My dad has heart trouble and doesn't need the stress. yet my mother tries too hard... (read in full...)

Can we really keep it together if she's gone for two years?

Q.   Hey guys. I'm in need of some opinions. I've been with my girlfriend for approaching two years now. We have a very loving and healthy relationship. And we are very compatible. We have discussed future marriage and kids and our lives together, in ...

A.   30 May 2014: Hello from a rainy UK, Im sorry you have been put into this situation and it must be hard for you right now to know how to feel and what to think. I think you both need to think long and hard about this situation. On one hand it would be unfa... (read in full...)

A letter to those struggling to find a job: be your own support system!

Q.   Just about one year ago I graduated from college and was so excited about my future. I had the world in front of me and all my close friends and relatives were telling me I’ve accomplished something great. Flash forward through that year and all the ...

A.   30 May 2014: Hello, A very well written article. Im currently unemployed and have an interview on Monday. Its a depressing, tough job market out there with much in the way of frustration and little in the way of reward. I am in my thirties and have plenty ... (read in full...)

I wonder if he could actually care for me.

Q.   Hi, I met someone on holiday five years ago. It was clear we liked the look of each other but nothing ever happened. He found me on facebook somehow when he got home and three years later we were still texting every other week. Last year he asked me...

A.   29 May 2014: Hello, To be honest I don't think it really matters too much if he cares about you are not as he lives in another country. For a relationship to work with this guy, either you need to move to Ireland, or he needs to move to England. If its take... (read in full...)

What kind of man lies like that?

Q.   I have been seeing a guy for the last couple of years. The connection seemed to be undeniable. He committed to me giving me an expensive piece of jewelry. We connected on FB. After little time, I realized that the immense majority of his friends ...

A.   26 May 2014: Oh dear - sounds like this guy is one of these men who finds out a woman's birthday, sends a card/gift and then offers more gifts and hopes you will give him a "gift", ahem, in return. "When he tried to solidify the relationship, he asked th... (read in full...)

What kind of man lies like that?

Q.   I have been seeing a guy for the last couple of years. The connection seemed to be undeniable. He committed to me giving me an expensive piece of jewelry. We connected on FB. After little time, I realized that the immense majority of his friends ...

A.   26 May 2014: Im afraid you have to realize you are one of many women who he is playing. The fact he bought you and expensive piece of jewellery at the start should have set off alarm bells im afraid. He is the kind of man who uses charm, manipulation and money ... (read in full...)

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