I feel he did not respect my 'No" when he requested anal sex and I have refused that and his other request. I don't know enough about it, like does it hurt?
Q. My boyfriend has recently requested anal sex, and he has also said he would like to ejaculate on my face. When he first asked if we could have anal sex I said no. I have tried it before (not actual sex, but similar) and didn't really enjoy it....
A. 28 November 2011: You need to have a conversation with him about respect, boundaries and repercussions should he fail to respect you in the future. I strongly disagree with chigirl on this issue largely because men are major manipulators when it come to pressure and ... (read in full...)
Is ejaculating in a woman's mouth more degrading than on her face?
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 6 years now, and really want to ejaculate in her mouth, she can't stand the taste. She wants me to ejaculate on her face, but I feel that's degrading....what do you guys suggest....?...
A. 28 November 2011: I don't allow either so she must really hate the taste of your ejaculate!!!. Since it's her suggestion that you ejaculate on her face, give it a try and see how she feels afterwards. If it's not what she expects or feels degraded by the experience ... (read in full...)
Can the contraceptive pill cause an upset stomach?
Q. I've been on the birth control pill for two and a half months, the first month I was completely fine but after my first period I generally had an upset stomach on-going for a month. I'm curious to whether this could be due to the pill before I go ...
A. 16 November 2011: The oral contraceptive manipulates your body's hormonal system into believing it's pregnant in order to prevent ovalation and many women experience GI upset during the early months of pregnancy. Whether or not your body is responding normally to ... (read in full...)
My Gf wants to get a tattoo of her ex who died and it worries me that I'll always be a second choice in her life
Q. Hi i am in a dilema my girlfriend wants to get a tattoo of her ex 's name who died it worries not cause im jealous but because im afraid of being her second choice and not being able to make her as happy as he did i dont wana tell her not to get the ...
A. 11 November 2011: That's quite a scenario. Being that you are so young I'm assuming that she is also. If she's just wanting to memorialize a special person from her past that meant a lot to her because he's dead there are other things she could do instead of a ... (read in full...)
My wife wont have anal sex, should I go to a prostitute or will I regret it?
Q. Hello friends, i know i have been several times here on DCupid issues about that issue, but still i want it to get this help from you! Please! Here it comes: i wish i could get intercourse in the anus in my wife but she doesn't want it anymore, we ...
A. 11 November 2011: At least you got her to consent twice, many women including myself won't even consent once!!!. It's her anus therefore it's ultimaltely her choice and she's closed that door. Your only choices is to either accept it and love her for the fact she ... (read in full...)
He cant ejaculate! How common is this and what, if anything, can I do?
Q. I have been dating a man for a few weeks now, everything is good and this isnt really a complaint, but he cant ejaculate through sex, blow jobs, handjobs...you name it, no girl has ever made him ejaculate! He is 29, in good health, doesnt t...
A. 21 October 2011: He's probubly gotten himself so accustomed to heavy pressure and grip during masterbation that he's conditioned himself. He really needs to lay off the masterbation for a few weeks, maybe even a couple of months to determine if he's penis will ... (read in full...)
Is my post-orgasm refractory period unusually long?
Q. When I have sex, I typically have no physical interest in sex again for at least half a day. And if I do try to have sex at that time, arousal is difficult unless my wife is wearing something particularly arousing. Also, the orgasm takes more time ...
A. 13 October 2011: The refractory period for my husband has been slowly yet steadily increasing for the last several years, he's 46. In our late 20's and early 30's we often had sex daily, sometimes more than once but it seems that once the 40's hit that has occured ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has a need to always comment on attractive women he sees!
Q. I have an otherwise great relationship with my boyfriend of two years. We have a lot of fun and have lots of things in common. My family and friends think he is a great guy too. However there is one thing that really bugs me. Whenever we are ...
A. 12 October 2011: Start pointing them out top him first! Really, it works like you wouldn't believe. He's probubly doing it out of thoughtlessness and being an overall dick. That's what they do and who they are but once you make a point of showing him you are not ... (read in full...)
Ladies in their 40's, can you share your birth control solutions?
Q. Any ladies in their 40's who have finished their families, just wondering what type of birth control you use? I'm not sure if anyone else still takes the pill at that age like I do as it is raising my blood pressure. Dr has advised that she w...
A. 6 October 2011: Your husband sounds like an ass, sterilization surgery for men is allot safer, less invasive and less expensive than a tubal ligation. I don't know about Australia but in the US you can't just get a hysterectomy without a medically necessary reason ... (read in full...)
Am I having a mid life crisis? It seems so important to increase the number of woman I have sex with. So would paying for it be a quick solution?
Q. I am single and am no spring chicken anymore, although Im not exactly geriatric either. In my life I havent really had many girlfriends and can count the number of sexual partners I've had on one hand. Im starting to feel that 'I've missed out...
A. 6 October 2011: It's a shame in our overly sexualized society that the amount of flesh pounding a man has accomplished in his life equates to some sort of "value"! We, as a civilization, seem far too interested in the numbers- number of partners, penis size, ... (read in full...)
G/f says she cant have sex due to "girl issues", but she's not on her period. What else could it be?
Q. My girlfreind says she cant have sex due to girl issues.But shes not on her period.What else could it be?...
A. 29 September 2011: Females have a more complex genitourinary system and in addition to what others have stated, it could also be endometriosis, PID ( pelvic inflamitory disease ), BV( bacterial vaginosis), PCS ( pelvic congestion syndrome), all of which makes vaginal ... (read in full...)
I'd like if she had a threesome!
Q. I'd enjoy if my wife has a MMF threesome but she doesnt know this fantasy i have. What do i do? Should i ask her? I think she would never does such thing like that but anyway i want this!...
A. 27 September 2011: It's one thing to fantasize and another to obsess about something that contraversial when you are supposed to be in a monagomous, wedded relationship. She may be turned on by the thought or she could be disgusted. This is a can of worms and you ... (read in full...)
I have only had sex with my current boyfriend, am I missing out on experiencing sex with other guys?
Q. ok so i am currently in a relationship with my boyfriend. im 23 and hes the only person ive had sex with and dated! and hes 24 and i am not his first, im his 13th sex object. right now in our relationship were happy, i know he loves me, he was the ...
A. 26 September 2011: I think people get caught up on the numbers of partners and it's supposed to mean something in the world of "experience". You can have just as much sexual "experience" with just one partner. You can experience a world of sexual encounters with the ... (read in full...)
Am I in the wrong for not doing it more often or when he asks for oral sex?
Q. hi, my boyfriend and i are both 26 and have been together for four years. We seem to have the same repetitive arguement all the time regarding performing oral sex on him. The thing is i really dont like doing it, so i dont do it often. maybe lik...
A. 26 September 2011: No you are not wrong and he needs to respect that "NO" means "NO" and not act like a toddler having a terrible 2 moment. There's nothing wrong with establishing boundaries but he also has the right to determine if he can be happy within those ... (read in full...)
What are the after affects of anal sex?
Q. What are the after affects of having anal sex? My boyfriend wants to do it but I'm scared because I hear that you have discharge from the anus afterwards. What are the good things about anal and what are the bad? Please help me out!?...
A. 20 September 2011: I don't personally practice anal sex and have had to fight to defend my body against unwanted anal violation in the past. It's definately something you should want to do for yourself, not because you are pressured to submit because your partner ... (read in full...)
Is she just being hyper sensitive about my hygiene so she doesn't have to give me head?
Q. hi hears my issue. My girlfriend say my penis smells even when i have just got out of the shower. I have no sti or other problems as i got checked. I feel this is her being hyper sensestive or just a reason for her not to give me head anymore. I in ...
A. 2 September 2011: I have a super sensitive sence of smell, not just body odors either. My husband's scrotum has an odor that's not necessarily strong or bad but it is an offensive odor to me, even straight out of the shower but he insist that I have virtually no ... (read in full...)
Diarrhea every time after anal sex?
Q. dear cupid, soo...this is kind of a gross question, buuut it's something i've really been kind of concerned about. is there any connection between diahrrea and anal sex? it seems like every time i have anal, i have diahrrea for at least a couple d...
A. 1 September 2011: Your body isn't tolerating the introduction of objects, lubricants, and/or seminal fluids in your GI tract. I'm not a GI specialist but I render anesthesia services in the O-R setting for many specialist from Gastroenterologist, to General ... (read in full...)
I want my wife to be more adventurous in bed
Q. So how do I get my wife of 36 years to lighten up and try some different positions. She just likes lying on her back and doing our thing. Get it over with and go to sleep. She does not like sucking, nor letting me enjoy her other than sticking it ...
A. 23 August 2011: After 36 yrs of marriage, she's probably set in her ways and has most likely gone through menopause two very difficult aspects to overcome even if she's interested in changing in the first place. Have you had any conversations with her regarding ... (read in full...)
Why do some women feel so bad if their man watches porn?
Q. I ask this question as I'm fed up seeing questions about porn coming up frequently and women complaining about their men watchin it. I'm 26, I've had 3 serious relationships and each man has loved to watch porn. Sometimes I've watched it with the...
A. 22 August 2011: To me, porn is a form of cheating/infidelity and is definately a form of prostitution since people are being paid to have sex and most times the public has to pay to watch. Even suppossed "educational" videos are more pornographic than educational! ... (read in full...)
My BF has asked me to use a strap-on for him. I don't want to!
Q. For background, my entire romantic life has been full of men who did not make me feel womanly. I happen to be a more forward/blunt person and that has resulted in me being the one who "wears the pants" in every relationship except my current one. I...
A. 22 August 2011: I had to laugh at this because I too am with a partner that is extrememly manly and macho but he does enjoy anal stimulation and penetration and has been enjoying himself solo since his late teens and now he's in his upper 40's! There are many ... (read in full...)
Do normal women find doggy style demeaning?
Q. The doggy style position makes me feel like I am losing my feminity and also lack of contact/caressing with my lover during sex. Is it normal for women to feel like this or is it just me?...
A. 22 August 2011: Your feelings are normal for you as well as many other women. I personally don't care for any " from behind" positions because the approach causes angle issues for me and it's not in the least bit enjoyable to be poked at when the angles are all ... (read in full...)
Trouble reaching orgasm.....
Q. I am an otherwise healthy male who has no trouble getting or maintaining erections. However, my problem is that it takes me a long time to orgasm and when I finally do it doesn't feel quite as great as it used to and the quantity of semen produced...
A. 10 August 2011: It's always good to get a complete physical when the penis starts to show evidence of symptoms that are new and currently unexplainable. Anything as mentioned by previous posters can lead to problems with erections and ejaculation and only a Dr can ... (read in full...)
Can being diabetic make a man impotent?
Q. Is it true that a diabetic is impotent. My husband is getting insulin injections aside from oral medications. Is it true he cannt have an erection? He also has problem with prostate. Is it true that this could block the coming out of his semen. ...
A. 10 August 2011: Most definately. Diabetes Mellitus whether under good controll or not can lead to serious medical complications over one's life time from neurological, to renal, to vascular, to occular as well as other manifestations involving the digestive system ... (read in full...)
Do girls get pleasure from anal sex?
Q. Hi, I have never had anal sex so I always wonder do gals derive pleasure out of it?...
A. 27 April 2011: I personally believe that only a small portion of the female population actually derives pleasure from being sodomized, 1 or 2 per 500. However there is so much pressure on females to submit and please and look like super models and porn stars ... (read in full...)
I just had anal sex. Am I still a virgin?
Q. Okay I know this is a stupid question but am im still a virgin? I mean...my boyfriend and I just did anal...and im wondering if im still a virgin. I'm kinda naive about that subject. Im sorry...
A. 10 April 2011: No, not by my definition of the term "Virgin". A virgin is someone untouched sexually, in any form. If you've been penetrated by a penis oraly, anally or vaginally I wouldn't consider you virginal any longer. It's all sex when shared with a ... (read in full...)
My wife to be revealed her sexual past. I feel sick to my stomach
Q. I am 31, she is 29. She is drop dead gorgeous. We fell in love a year and a half ago when she was one of my day nurses when I had spent some time in the hospital recovering from a tumor in my knee (non cancerous) During our time dating, I would ...
A. 31 March 2011: I can easily see why you feel sick to your stomach about your fiancee's past, it's ugly and potentially dangerous. I'm sure she feels the same way about it too and that explains her reluctance to tell you about it. I do admire her for being honest ... (read in full...)
My wife refuses to try anything new in the bedroom! Help!
Q. my wife and i have been married for 18 years but have known each other over 20 years, she is 44 , i am 57,she is not adventurous at all in the bedroom. i have asked to do a few things like, play with her breasts when we make love, i have asked her ...
A. 31 March 2011: Not everyone embraces sexually adventurous activities and just as sexless says, you should be very well aware of your beloved's sexual limits and bondaries. Even couples who are less mismatched than you two are often find that libido and sence of ... (read in full...)
I don't enjoy sex at all
Q. me and my bf have been together for 3 years. We have a healthy sex life but the problem is i dont enjoy sex at all. i think it uncomftable and unpleasurable the only bit i like is the fact i get to hold my bf so close and were so cuddly afterwards. ...
A. 23 March 2011: You need to do two things: (1) masterbate to learn what you like and what trigggers orgasm for you and (2) communicate with your partner about what you need for sex to be pleasurable, or at least comfortable, for you. It's not uncommon for women ... (read in full...)
Can having frequent anal sex cause incontinence later in life?
Q. My boyfriend and I have done anal five times now. The last time was a couple weeks ago but I'm wondering how much you have to do before you risk becoming incontinent? I don't want to be in my 60s and not be able to hold my crap inside me til I can ...
A. 23 March 2011: It really depends on who you ask. Suppossed "experts" claim that when anal sex is practiced by following all of the "rules of play and preporation", anal sex can be a safe alternative with no long term ill effects. However, if you address your ... (read in full...)
Head ache after masterbation?
Q. I have recently been having headaches after materbating, i dont know why, this is only recently its happened 3 times in a row now and i dont know why. iv had sex before and masterbated without any problems before. its only been this week. When i ...
A. 22 March 2011: You are probubly straining and working furriously to get yourself off in a short time. Are you holding your breath? Are you holding your head up and stiffening your neck? Is there an excessive amount of tension in your working shoulder/arm? All ... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't give me blow jobs anymore!
Q. so I have a question for you guys on here, I'm sure there are other posts on here about the same subject on here. I have been happily married for 6 years now and wouldn't change a single thing except for one. my wife does not give me blow jobs any ...
A. 22 March 2011: I personally think that the direct approach is the best, unless you know first hand that she performed BJ's in the past under duress, then ask her point blank "what changed?". You have a right to know what the deal is but you'll also have to be ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to predict before marriage that a couple's sex life will suck 5-10 years after they get married?
Q. Almost every one of my guy friends who has been married for more than 5 years or so has told me their wife has lost almost all interest in sex. Many go for a month or two without it onb a regular basis. They also tell me about friends of theirs who ...
A. 22 March 2011: I think that it's not just women who change even though it's more steriotypical to "blame" the woman for the lack of physical intimacy in long term relationships. Many men become lazy, complaicent and let themselves go just as much as women do. ... (read in full...)
How do I get my bf to give me oral sex?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have sex a few times a week which is satisfying for both of us. It was only today when we were 'getting in the mood' I realised, he has never given me oral! While i give him oral often to get him in the mood (whether i enjoy...
A. 21 March 2011: He's immature and a bit self centered. However, I'm not a fan of forcing people to do what they don't want to do. He's made up his mind that he didn't like it based on past experiences. So, until he has a change of heart all you can do is ... (read in full...)
How common is the practice of anal stimulation among men?
Q. how common is the practice of anal stimulation among all (sexual-orientation) men? Is it a common practice, done while alone, pleasuring self? and lastly, is it a practice that is enjoyed, but one that many men find embarrassed to admit to?...
A. 21 March 2011: I don't know the numbers but by the volume of toys it must be pretty popular. Many may not admit they are either interested or already playing that way out of shame, embarrasment or fear of judgement about their sexual orientation. I think many ... (read in full...)
How do I ask him about this?
Q. my man and i have been together for quite some time now, and he is the only man i've tried anal with. he is really into it- so i've been thinking of trying to play with his prostate gland. i understand what to do, the only problem is- how do i ask ...
A. 21 March 2011: I'd be frank and to the point. By your admission, "he's really into it" when he's the penetrator. Next time anal comes up, tell him what's good for the goose is good for the gander and if he wants to continue have access to your anus, then he's ... (read in full...)
B/f thinks if I have sex with another girl it will help our relationship
Q. Hello DC aunts and uncles. I'm in need of advice, I will make this short. My boyfriend honestly believes that if I have sex with another girl it would "help" our relationship. Personally thats a load of bull. I know it won't I know things will only ...
A. 16 March 2011: Excuse me but what does "won't take NO for an answere mean" Does he have some kind of authority over you that makes what you say/feel irrelivent? Have you expressed interest in lesbian or bisexual relationships?
I think this "amazing" guy you ... (read in full...)
Is her discomfort an excuse for not wanting more?
Q. So I read tons of stuff on here about girls being able to go for round after round of sex, and Its left me with a lot of questions. My girlfriend and I have, from what I can see, a very good sex life. Though we are both in high school, we do it...
A. 8 March 2011: OK cleareyes, let me explain something to you about "round two". This is a technique that older and more experienced lovers learn to do over time and most men, require a refractory period themselves in order to achieve another erection for another ... (read in full...)
He wants to take pictures
Q. Every time we go for a real hot time, he always wanted to take pictures of me playing with him. He said he is having more pleasures on that. Just like a porn picture. Is this normal? Is he a perv?...
A. 8 March 2011: Though I don't consider his request to photograph you in an intimate setting to be pervy since males tend to be more visual creatures than us. I do consider his REPEATED requests to take your picture troubling.
I personally wouldn't ever cons... (read in full...)
Can you no longer be considered a virgin if there is no penetration?
Q. How do you define virginity? How do you lose it? I know the most known reason when there is penetration by the male organ? How about plain masturbation? Can you still be considered a virgin if a man touched your p***y or did cunnilingus but no p...
A. 8 March 2011: My definition of virginity is quite strict being that if you have ANY sexual contact with another person, it is sex regardless of whether penetration occures or not. If you perform/recieve oral sex from another person you are not a virgin in my ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants everything his way and doesn't care about me!
Q. I'm getting really annoyed with my so-called boyfriend. I just can't reason with him anymore... even when I try to be fair and do things equally, it's still not good enough. For example, if we're arguing over which film to watch, I'll say "Okay, ...
A. 8 March 2011: Nothing! He's a selfish narcissist. Unless he's willing to be open to your wants, desires and needs on a 50-50 basis you've only got more of the same repeated behavior to expect from him. Unless you FORCEFULLY flex some authority, you are ... (read in full...)
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