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*ucy2118 agony aunt

*ucy2118

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How do I stop comparing myself to the new guy? How to move on?

Q.   We were together for 2 years and it was the most important relationship I have ever had because we started as friends first.(we also did and do work together), we both had issues, tried to work through them and ultimately it ended up that it "just ...

A.   30 March 2009: Hey you, Noticing that your still emotional and delicate from you message, will try and be gentle. Your seriously need 2 stop comparing yourself with this guy, as you said you can pull girls etc so your obvisously not that bad looking. Also it's... (read in full...)

I am very pale and want a new foundation, so my boyfriend can notice how nice my make up is... any ideas?

Q.   Im not sure if this is the place for this question.... It starts off a bit weird but then i explain myself. I am very pale and want a new foundation. I can't find one anywhere, that dosnt have an orange tint. i dont want to look gothicy i just w...

A.   8 May 2008: Hello, i feel your pain i'm very pale also But not 2 worry i've found a brand of make up that was made by a pale women for pale women :) It's on Asos.com http://www.asos.com/Dainty-Do... (read in full...)

We both suggest we go out sometime, but she never calls me back! What gives ?

Q.   So basically I met this girl in my college class and we hit it off and talked every class but nothing more then that because I was under the impression she had a boyfriend. Late in the semester I found out she didn't so I got her number and we went ...

A.   5 March 2008: Mayb try and call her about it, talk and say you didn't mean what you said, she'll probably find it funny, as you wanted to make sure that she knows you didn't mean it. I wouldn't worry. Take your time with her, if you have strong feelings for her ... (read in full...)

I would love to be more than just friends with her but does she feel the same way?

Q.   I have a friend who I have known now for about 9 months. Gradually over this time, we've become very close. I see her probably 2-3 times a month, mainly at weekends when we go clubbing with all my friends and her friends. Every time we go out...

A.   5 March 2008: She will either want to stay close friends as she's got you to be close to or either want a relationship. It's up to you want you do, but i think you should talk to her about it as you won't know otherwise, you did say that you and her talk about ... (read in full...)

He used a condom but I'm panicking in case I'm pregnant!!!

Q.   Hi. I'm seventeen, nearly eighteen and my boyfriend and I just started having sex about three weeks ago (it was my first time). I am not on the pill, but he has been using condoms (100% properly). I was worried about pregnancy so on February 29th I ...

A.   5 March 2008: I wouldn't worry, there's always a worry when people have sex, as your only 16 your periods could be irregular, so i wouldn't worry. I can relate to your story, i had the same problem i couldn't get it out of my head that i could be, i wasn't and i ... (read in full...)

I miss kissing!

Q.   This guy wants me to be his girlfriend but I do not want a boyfriend right now. I just went through a bad breakup a few months ago and I am just chillin' for now and living life. I am kinda attracted to him, but he is over 10 years younger than I ...

A.   4 March 2008: I feel like guys think sex is all girls want, so they don't kiss any more. All i used to get was a peck from my ex boyfriend. Which obviously wasn't enough for me. Sex is less passionate without kissing, when kissing involved it makes it more ... (read in full...)

We both suggest we go out sometime, but she never calls me back! What gives ?

Q.   So basically I met this girl in my college class and we hit it off and talked every class but nothing more then that because I was under the impression she had a boyfriend. Late in the semester I found out she didn't so I got her number and we went ...

A.   4 March 2008: She may have other issues in her life that pop up without warning, so she arranges things but then has to cancel because something has coming up. If this is the case you need to be understanding as shes short of time. Have you tried speaking to her ... (read in full...)

How can I make this horrible non relationship either become something or end, without losing my best friend in the process?

Q.   Ok, very simple common problem I know, but that doesn't really make it any easier... In my first year of uni I went out with a guy who lived in my block. We weren't together for very long but I really fell for him and now, a year and a half later, ...

A.   3 March 2008: Communicate with him as much as possible, make him listen to what you've got to say, if he can't do that then he really isn't the guy for you as he can't get over his imaturity to listen to you. Take up a hobby that thakes your mind off of him, ... (read in full...)

Is it possible to approach a girl without teasing and flirting with? That is not my style.

Q.   hi there, i kinda need your urgent help; i think i am on the way to like this girl, but there is one big thing making us peoples of different world. i am a 22 years old virgin having no girl friend in my life, never kissed or been kissed; it is no...

A.   3 March 2008: Some girls like that some guys are inexperienced as their not coccky ot arrongant about it, plus she'll be able to teach you how she likes it. Respect is what all girls want, my ex boyfriend never "treated me mean to keep me keen" and i loved him ... (read in full...)

On A Search For Either Escorts Or Massage Parlours Any Advice Welcome.

Q.   Hi All I have never had a girlfriend or sex and I am in my 20's, I am fed up waiting for the right female to come along as I know it will probably never happen so I have decided to look for sex either in a massage parlour or hire an escort as I n...

A.   29 February 2008: Is that all you want? Sex? I live in the south west and i don't think that things like that happen like that down this way, well not that i know of anyway. X... (read in full...)

How to let my older friend know how I feel for him without looking foolish?

Q.   I am madly in love with a guy who is 12 years older than me. He is Christian and so am I. We wouldn't have sex or even kiss before marriage but I just love being near him how do I let him know how I feel for him without making me look like a fool or ...

A.   29 February 2008: Try spending more time with him, find out what he likes, hobbies etc and join him. This way you'll feel more comfortable around him and less shy. You never know you could end up having fun! Hope this helps. X... (read in full...)

She's pregnant but has been bleeding for two weeks now. What advice can I give?

Q.   A friend of mine doesn't have periods for two months. A pregnancy test showed she's pregnant (I think some 4-5 weeks). And now she had some bleeding, it began two days ago, she's really worried and frustrated. Can it mean smth's wrong with the baby? ...

A.   27 February 2008: Take her to her doctor immediately. X... (read in full...)

Why is he keeping me a secret?

Q.   Been dating this guy for a while. He's not willing to introduce me to any of his friends or family. He's been divorced for the last 4 years or so and still talks a lot about his ex and what has happened and still doing things for her. The sex is g...

A.   27 February 2008: Ask him about it, commmunication is key in any relationship. By the way he reacts you'll be able to tell whats going on, if he clams up etc. Then deal with the sitation. Hope this helps. X... (read in full...)

We have very different views on showing affections. What should I do?

Q.   Hi there, my husband, Rick is one of those clingy types; He always wants to spend every waking moment with me. I’ve always thought of him as quite possessive. But I suppose, the most annoying thing about him is that he is always declaring hi...

A.   27 February 2008: You do get those type of guys that touchy all the time, i had a relationship like that but it was with someone i worked with which made it hard cos i couldn't get away from him. He would always come up behind me and kiss my neck and i would flinch ... (read in full...)

Whatever happened to the days of romance?

Q.   Whatever happened to those days of those true passionate romance? You know the ones like Romeo and Juliet. Their passion for each other was not only idyllic, but powerful and sexy. They never once hesitated in expressing and showing their love ...

A.   27 February 2008: Your not the only that feels that way, i do to. However, in modern day life romance and passion don't exist anymore, sex, arrongance and pride get the in. I remember when my grandad sent my granma a valentines day card in secret, he wrote he poem ... (read in full...)

Should I suggest she leaves her lying boyfriend for me?

Q.   Alright.. So I have been talking to this girl on and off for the past year now. Just like most people, she does not like to make decisions. She has been dating someone else(a real lying pos) for the last few months, but she still talks to me and ...

A.   27 February 2008: Hmmm this is a hard one. I think you should leave her to make her own mind up, like you said you don't want to push her into anything. But if she does leave him, don't be surprised if she doesn't come running into your arms straight away. She'll be ... (read in full...)

I've just split with my girl but I want to meet someone new straight away. Is this right?

Q.   I just broke up with my girlfriend. In this relationship I really didn't think I was treated well. She didn't pay much attention to me and couldn't show me ANY affection. After going out for two months she couldn't kiss me. I want to know, is it ...

A.   27 February 2008: I think the affection craving having at the moment, is because you didn't have anything like that in your past relationship. She may have been nervous of doing something wrong like not kissing you well enough. I think it's fine that your looking for ... (read in full...)

I really want to have sex with him , but I just think I'll end up pregnant, what can I do to get over this?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for two years now and we have never had sexual intercourse. We have played around a lot with other practices such as oral sex but the one reason I have always shied away from intercourse is that I am absolutely terrified ...

A.   27 February 2008: Although the pill and condoms are the most common form of contraception, it mean their the only ones. I suggest you go any see your doctor for information on other forms, experiment with some and find one your completely comfortable with. Take your ... (read in full...)

I found him in bed with another girl..we split, now he wants to get back together..Should I forgive and forget ?

Q.   I've been really impressed with this site so far, so I'm hoping that maybe someone out there can give me some advice, or share a similar story... I met my last boyfriend about 8 months ago, and we clicked immediately. We had text book compatabili...

A.   27 February 2008: I think you need to stand strong and walk away from him, although he's said sorry, sometimes sorry isn't enough to take away the pain he caused by what you saw. You'll hurt for a while as you thought this was the guy that you'd marry, but many women ... (read in full...)

What do I write on my ex's birthday card?... I still love her.

Q.   Ok, so i dont know how to explain this or anything so here it goes. My ex's birthday is in a few days and i want to send her a birthday e-card. I just dont want to say Happy Birthday I am usually so good with words but im at lost for some here, ...

A.   27 February 2008: Is she in a relationship?? Did your relationship end badly? If she's in a relationship just say "hope you have a good day, you deserve it" If she's not write "Happy Birthday, i miss you" or something along the lines of that. She'll get the mess... (read in full...)

I slept with my ex who has a new girlfriend and now I'm really confused.

Q.   I made a huge huge mistake last nite!! My ex boyfriend and I ended badly because he really hurt me but we both new we loved each other still but he needed some space. He now has a new girlfriend whom he's been with for about a month, and they've ...

A.   27 February 2008: I think you wait until he works out what he wants, whether thats you or his girlfriend. Don't take all the blame on yourself, it takes two. Hope this helps. X ... (read in full...)

He's dying......And I think I'm going to break....

Q.   I fairly recently split up with an ex... I was very much in love with him.... but there was a big distance between us and I very rarely saw him... I was so unhappy I ended things. Since I have found a lovely guy nearer... who I am happy with.... But ...

A.   27 February 2008: It's only normal for people to get upset when a close one get's ill. I think you should only contact him if you want him back because i think the reason that he's cut you off is because it's too painful for him to see you with another guy. I think ... (read in full...)

I found out my girlfriend of 7 years was having relations with another man...

Q.   This is probalbly the dumbest question there is.... I found out my girlfriend of 7 years was having relations with another man. This was last April that I found out. It's almost been a year of recovery and trying my best. Well everything was f...

A.   27 February 2008: I think it's time to move on, it'll hurt and you'll feel lonely but life is too short to be heart broken, what she's doing is not fair on you and if she loved you she wouldn't be doing it to you. If spilting up seems to be the last thing you want to ... (read in full...)

My wife has a low sex drive, I can live with it but would really like if she gave me blowjobs, any ideas to convince her?

Q.   I have a sad and serious problem. I have been married to a fantastic woman whom I love very much for almost 5 years. But our sex life is not satisfying for me. She has a very low sex drive and basically only likes the missionary position and ...

A.   27 February 2008: Show her you think she's sexy, start by kissing and cuddling her, then let thing flow slowly and intimately. Some women don't like the thought of oral sex, but you need to find a way to suggest that it's ok or even shwoing her it doesn't matter if ... (read in full...)

Why has he never contacted me again?

Q.   Why would a guy tell you that he'll contact you as soon as he's free / has some time, then he never contacts you again - Is it just a polite way of cutting you off or does he intend to come back to you at some stage or you are his 'back up'. I know ...

A.   26 February 2008: I think it bothers you that he hasn't contacted you, thats the hold he has on you, because no girl likes being cut off. Forget about him and find someone new, sooner or later he'll come crawling back wondering why your not bothered anymore, it'll ... (read in full...)

Why cant I find Mr. Right?

Q.   What is wrong with me? I am soo desperate and ready to meet someone and date them etc However, any guys that I meet or seem to want to go out with me, I have no interest in whatsoever. There are a few guys that text me a lot, wanna see me etc but I ...

A.   26 February 2008: It's general knownlage that women are attracted to bad boys, but try seeing the guys your meeting in a new light, look at their good points, if they match what your looking for go out again. Spend time with them more. Forget about the other guy, ... (read in full...)

How can I get back together with him without my parents getting mad at me?

Q.   Ok, I have broken up with my BF over silly arguments two times this week. They have been more than breakups just stupid fights... but I'm a drama queen so I blow everything out of proportion (this is embarrasing to admit =/). So both times I broke ...

A.   26 February 2008: Your parent's are just looking out for your and your best interests. Of course they'll be on your side, your their daughter. Even if you did get back with your ex they should be happy that your happy. Parents need to learn not to get to involved ... (read in full...)

I cheated - what shall I do?

Q.   I cheated on my boyfiend at the New Year he doesn't know but I was wondering what I should do, he doesn't suspect anything. Shall I just keep it to myself or tell him what happened? Please help this is so important....

A.   26 February 2008: I think you should tell him, he'll be mad but if you don't it'll always be in the back of your mind. Tell him and deal with the consiquences from your actions. Hope this helps. X... (read in full...)

Usually somebody gives their medal to their girlfriend. Before I sign should I ask if one day she could be my girlfriend?

Q.   I like my friend, she has a boyfriend and she's one year older than me. The other day she asked for my first track and field medal. She also wants me to sign a contract as a joke to make sure I give it to her. Usually somebody gives their medal ...

A.   26 February 2008: I think she's trying either to trick you or playing with your feelings, maybe if you tell her your feelings she'll tell you what she's wants from you. Hope this helps. X... (read in full...)

I am stuck in a marriage and want to get out. Please help

Q.   I got married 5 years ago we lived together 2 years b4 that. Just before I got married, I re-met the love of my life who I have known since the 80's. I was confused and scared, so I got married (I shouldn't have) We started up a relationship aga...

A.   26 February 2008: I think you should work out what you really want. It's unfair on both your girlfriend and your wife. If things aren't going well with your wife speak to her about it, she feels the same as you, spilt up with her or work it out ans forget about your ... (read in full...)

Am I over reacting by feeling uneasy about my partners chatroom activities.

Q.   Am I over reacting by feeling uneasy about my partners chatroom activities. I am never told, I have always found out by accident or phone numbers clumsily left out. This has been going on for almost two years. I am always told that these names are ...

A.   26 February 2008: I think she's trying to get the best of both worlds, with you and whoever else she's talking to. The should be no reason for hiding things in a relationship at all and if it is innocent she should tell you the truth and stop lying to you. I think if ... (read in full...)

Why does a man just cut contact with you?

Q.   why? what makes a man cut contact with you unexpectedly even after youve asked why they are ignoring you and yet still they ignore you. why? even when you havent done anything wrong. does it take a certain type of a man to not consider your feelings ...

A.   26 February 2008: I don't mean to be harsh but how long were you with this guy??? If it's not that long then I feel your thinking to far into things. Maybe he's having issues with what he wants at the moment and thought that cutting you off completly would be the b... (read in full...)

She went back to her abusive ex. How do I get her back?

Q.   I met this girl on the internet. She is 28 divorced and has two boys. When i met her she said she came out of a abisive relationship that she was in for 4 yrs. I am 40 and have a son. I know i took some of the retionship for granted because she said ...

A.   26 February 2008: I think she's using her ex as a security blanket once she ended things with you. Does she know you love her? She seems like she would be very insecure coming out of a abusive relationship so she would need to be comforted, more so than any other ... (read in full...)

I don't want to be in a relationship so I use porn, but feel dirty about it

Q.   i don't want to go into another relationship for now. to do this, sometimes i watch porns and masterbate after that to calm down my lubido. but i feel so dirty after this most of the time. am i doing the right thing? please help me....

A.   26 February 2008: Using porn is perfectly healthy. It's fair enough that you don't want a relationship but it doesn't mean you have to feel bad from masterbation. Hope this Helps. X... (read in full...)

How do I get him interested again?

Q.   my husband and i have been experiencing difficulties in our marriage he tells me a part of him has died and he's not happy anymore. he says that he feels i was never interested in him much and it is definately not true. I was just too busy taking ...

A.   26 February 2008: It's fair enough that you've got other things to do, but youe husband needs some time with you to. I think maybe a weekend away together, tell him that you want to spend some quality time with him. I think this will make him feel wanted. If that ... (read in full...)

Why was she embarassed at the prospect of all her bush being seen through panties but not about the many hairs curling from under her panties?

Q.   A few weeks ago I took some professional photos of a beautiful Caribbean girl with very large breasts. I had asked her to put on underwear that was slightly transparent. She refused to put it on because of the panties being a bit see-through. I ...

A.   25 February 2008: This many have been because with the see through knickers everything was on show and although with her knickers some of her was showing but it wasn't everything. Sometimes when girl do thing like that they like to keep some of their dignity. Hope ... (read in full...)

I found out she lied to me, should I confront her?

Q.   Regretfully, I snooped on my girlfriend's emails to either confirm or deny some suspicions. I found out she had lied to me about seeing a particular guy I had specifically questioned her about a while ago. She even made me believe her lies. But ...

A.   25 February 2008: I think you should ask her again and if she lies again, confront her. If she cares about you the way you say she does she'll be mad for a while but let her cool off for a while, she'll want to solve the problem as much as you do. You both need to ... (read in full...)

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