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... Send *ucky786 a private message | | | *ucky786's profile:I live on my own in West Yorkshire in my lovely house. I work in the legal sector and love spending time in Starbucks with my friends.
I am currently single and enjoy my freedom and independence. I love reading walking and watching films. My job is quite stressful so I enjoy activities that serve as an outlet for relieving all that stress.
I've been married, divorced, suffered child abuse and self-harm but I survived all of that! I think that's what makes me the person I am. I've learnt many harsh lessons in life and the most important one is that life is too short to hate those that have wronged us. Instead I thank god each day for his blessings.
I also love my dad very much, more than he will ever know x |
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How can I prove I don't do this on purpose? Looking at others. What should I do?
Q. So me and my hubby have been together for a year and 6 months. Weve been having serious issues over a staring problem Ive picked up out of nowhere. I seem to train myself to look at people without actually looking at them and I dont even realiZE...
A. 5 April 2012: Are you "staring" at other men or men and women? If it causing this much of a problem you need to try and stop. Everytime you find yourself staring to stare, stop.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend suddenly working late. Is he cheating?
Q. Hello, im slightly worried dont know if im paranoid but, but my gut feeling is telling me my boyfriend is cheating on me, and your gut instinct is always right, right? My boyfriend works at a m.o.t place not far from where i live. He normally...
A. 2 April 2012: Sounds like he is just working hard making the most of extra hours and cash.
Is there anything else other than the extra hours that makes you think he may be cheating? Is he getting dressed up for work? Or is he in his usual work gear when he ... (read in full...)
Going out as friend when he's in a relationship?
Q. Okay, the last 4/5 weekends I've been hanging out with the guys and become quite friendly with one of them, he has a girlfriend. He has asked if I would like to go out for a meal with him and a couple of drinks. Its not a date but what I want ...
A. 2 April 2012: If you were his girlfriend how would you feel?... (read in full...)
Should I become a bad girl to get his attention?
Q. Hi i am 16 years old and have never had a boyfriend. I really like this guy but I know he doesn't like me in return and even if he does I don't have the confidence to ask him out. The thing is I am just too nice: i have good manners, i am polite and ...
A. 1 April 2012: Do you want him to like you or do you want him to like the person you're pretending to be? If you pretend to be someone it would be very hard to keep it up for long. You sound like a nice person, just be true to yourself.... (read in full...)
We got into my argument over my husband's drinking and he hit me!
Q. My husband and I got into am arguement over him drinking and coming home smelling like alcohol, so the other night he informed me that he was drinking a beer while driving home, that did not sit well with me, all I ask os that he not come home ...
A. 1 April 2012: There seems to be an escalation in the violence. It seems to be getting worse.
Leave him to get the help he needs. Have no contact with him. If he wants to sort out his drinking, he has to do to do it on his own without you around.... (read in full...)
Is it normal to worry that your partner will find someone else?
Q. Is it normal to always worry that your significant other will find someone else?...
A. 1 April 2012: It's normal to have insecurities about your relationship but it's not normal to ALWAYS worry. What makes you worry? Is it something that s/he has said or done?
Remember this, you cannot control your significant other. If they are going to cheat or... (read in full...)
I'm flying to meet my LDR fiance in three days and he has said he doesn't love me anymore!
Q. Hi, I'm 18 years old and I've been in a LDR with my german fiance (who's one month older than me) for 1 year and 5 months. We met for 3 times and spent one full week+2 weekends together in total. We were both virgins when we met but that changed. ...
A. 1 April 2012: You can't do anything to make anyone love you. He's told you he doesn't love you and you should accept and respect that and not go to Germany.
Imagine how horrible and awkward you are both going to feel if you do go? A whole 9 days with someone ... (read in full...)
What should I do? He said he did not want to be with me and now he rings me all the time!
Q. Hi all, this is my 1st time posting.... Was "strictly" friends with my ex for 8 yrs. We dated off and on from fall 2010 until this Jan. He told me he didn't wanna be in a relationship with me. How it was "easier to be with other women and they...
A. 31 March 2012: You should carry on ignoring him. You've done well so far. If you start feeling bad just remember how he ended it with you.
You have done nothing wrong at all.
... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to discredit all the good we had in our relationship? Did I take it all for granted and basically throw a good thing away?
Q. Just wanting to know people's opinions.... I asked a question about this before, but there is new information now... My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year. From the beginning, he has been very loving towards me, tel...
A. 31 March 2012: She "who sticks her nose into a beehive will get more than a nose full of honey."
Snooping is a bad thing and I wouldn't do it because you never know what you'll find. Having found out what had gone on at the beginning of your relation... (read in full...)
We've been together four years and I've always hoped he would change!
Q. Hi, I've been with my bf for about 4 yrs. We've had our share of issues. I always hoped somehow he would change, but I don't believe he will. Sometimes its incredible he's sooo complimentive, charming, he will cook for me treat me great and o...
A. 31 March 2012: Why are you still with this loser? He has problems which he needs to sort out on his own. You need to get him out of your life, stop buying him things and stop being his doormat!
You cannot change this man. ... (read in full...)
We admitted how we felt about each other but he has totally backed off!
Q. Hi everyone. I'd really like a second person's opinion of this "situation" as i have a tendency to overreact. I have this friend who, while i've known for a while, has only just become my really close friend within about the last 3 years. And yes,...
A. 30 March 2012: It's interesting that all was fine until you both met. Then you kissed and cuddled, went back home and suddenly he's not interested anymore. The you see him again and kiss and cuddle, nothing more and then he goes home and backs off again, only ... (read in full...)
I don't like being a laughing stock!
Q. Dear cupid I am a petite person. yesterday my bf (of 2 years) told me one of our common friends was teasing abt me that how my how short i look when i drive, how tiny my arms feet look and how i look like an egg plant.... I asked him how he ...
A. 30 March 2012: It's about boundaries. Your height is a sensitive issue for you. Whilst you might expect people you don't care about to laugh behind your back, you didn't expect it from your boyfriend. He's supposed to stick up for you when you are there and when ... (read in full...)
How do I get people to be jealous that my boyfriend really likes me?
Q. short sweet and to the point : my boyfriend is extremely liked by many black females . he's mixed but looks black . i'm white . he's really good abt always holding my hand EVERYWHERE we go and good at looking me in my and communication . but ...
A. 30 March 2012: Why would you want to invoke negative emotions in other people when they see you both? Are you really with him JUST to make others jealous? Why do you care what people think? Just enjoy being with your boyfriend and forget the rest.... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he love me?
Q. i have known this guy for like 2yrs, he is married but not really very happy into this relation of his. i "really" love him and even broke up with a boyfriend of 4years for him,because i dint want to cheat on him. he used to like my best friend in ...
A. 30 March 2012: He'a not interested just let it go. He has too much going on in his lfe and you should just back off completely. Whether his marriage is good or not is none of your business. He is not availble to you. Don't waste any more of your time on this guy. ... (read in full...)
What are the chances of my ex falling in love with me again and us getting back together?
Q. I'm still in love with my exboyfriend. He sayes he loves me and cares for me, but not in love with me any more. We still talk from time to time and have an occasional drink every now and then. What are the chances of him falling in love with me ...
A. 30 March 2012: Why did you two break up? Think about it. Unless that has changed, you won't get back together.
It seems he cares about you and obviously wants to be friends but I'm afraid you might not even have that if you keep thinking like this. If you can'... (read in full...)
I think I flirted too much and too openly with him and scared him off!
Q. I had flirted with this dude that I had met I think a good few weeks ago. I am afraid I came on too strong(I am very new to flirting with guys so...) But at first he didn't seem creeped out He laughed alot and when all of my friends went away he ...
A. 29 March 2012: What I don't understand is what you need to apologise for? You feel bad for being forward? You said yourself you were flirting with him and he didn't seem creeped out? How would you apologise?
"I just wanted to say sorry for telling you, in front... (read in full...)
Can I believe her that nothing happened but him putting his hand on her back?
Q. okay.i am in a relation from 6 years with a girl in my neighbourhood.we were happy and our relationship was cute.she had to go to china for her m.b.b.s.one day we had a fight and we dint talk for two months.in this gap she talked to another guy who ...
A. 29 March 2012: You don't trust her. That is the theme throughout your post. She has told you nothing really has happened other than the hand on her back which she asked him to remove. Is this the first time this has happened? Has she done this before?
You h... (read in full...)
I'm considering confronting this bully from my former workplace
Q. I encountered this irritating co worker at workplace 2 yrs back . We had mutual friends though whom i got introduced to him. He appeared real friendly at first. Later he and i were made to work in the same assignment with another senior member (a...
A. 29 March 2012: I don't mean to sound horrible but what are you going to gain by sending this e-mail? I would strongly advise against it. What if he prints it and passes it around to others?
Having been in a similar situation, I would say move on with your dig... (read in full...)
Why did my married collegue keep taking off his wedding ring at lunch?
Q. Hi ! I just had a business lunch with a male colleague. During the entire time, he kept taking his wedding band on and off and twisting it too. It was not very subtle and a little distracting. What does this mean?...
A. 29 March 2012: It was either too uncomfortable for the situation he was in(i.e. he wishes he wasn't married at that time) or he just likes to mess around with it. In isolation the single act of taking it off really doesn't "mean" much.... (read in full...)
Is looseness a sign of cheating?
Q. Okay I'm a young male around 18-21. My girlfriend lately has been very distance and when.we do have sex she feels loser. Is this a sign she is cheating?...
A. 23 March 2012: I don't think it is but because you feel she is becoming distant from you, you think she must be cheating and in your head she feels loose. It's a vicious circle. You should talk to her and find out why she has become distant.... (read in full...)
People give me nasty looks, so when they get one back they don't like it! Why is this?
Q. I dont get it, People are rude to me give me nasty looks but then when i do it to them they dont like it. Well what do you expect? What you put out you will get back? If your nice people will be nice back. Why are people like that if they dont ...
A. 23 March 2012: Try this, when you go out in the morning, meet a passing stranger's eye and say "good morning" with a smile...... (read in full...)
I feel like the spark is gone. Will it ever come back?
Q. Why am I not as happy as I should be? I love him so much:(? My ex and I got back together after a year split. I love him so much and hated it without him. He broke up with me cause he didn't want a relationship at that time. We...
A. 23 March 2012: I think the spark you crave isn't there because you aren't giving yourself fully to your ex. You are holding back. Maybe you're feeling scared about him ending things again which is why you want him to be sure about re-kindling this romance?
Why d... (read in full...)
Boyfriend problems - Is it really over?
Q. Hi everyone. I would appreciate some advice about my situation with my boyfriend. We've been together for four and a half years and always been long distance only seeing each other on weekends. I always go to see him because I still live at home ...
A. 21 March 2012: If it's not over now I think it will be soon. His behaviour towards you has changed so much in that he swears AT you rather than in front of you. That is disrespectful. You can see the changes happening in front of you. He is giving off all the ... (read in full...)
Does sucking make the breast bigger?
Q. does sucking increase the size of breast ...
A. 21 March 2012: If it did then why would women bother paying for implants?!... (read in full...)
Does anyone else have trouble forgiving in a relationship?
Q. Does anyone else find that whenever anyone does anything wrong they can't forgive them very easily? It's like whenever anyone's done anything wrong in a relationship I can't forgive them all I can do is keep moaning and going on about it. I am so ...
A. 21 March 2012: Forgiving is not a good thing in my experience. Too many people see it as an invitation to treat you like a mug. Why should you forgive and let people off the hook so easy when they are the ones that messed up? You forgive when you are good and ... (read in full...)
Should I not forgive my best friend and try to let her go?
Q. This is my first time posting on DearCupid, and I apologize beforehand if my post is too long! I don’t really know where to begin, so I guess I’ll just start anywhere. My old best friend and I were best friends for countless years....
A. 17 March 2012: You can't be friends with someone who gains their self-esteem from putting other people down. It seems to me like once she got into this art college and you didn't, she saw that as winning. For the first time in her life, she had won. Whether you ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling so down but don't know why
Q. Im feeling really down lately. I cant put my finger on one reason for feeling like this, I think there are many factors. But the ones that get to me the most are that Im 29 in 2 months and still single. My age depresses me greatly. Im always looking ...
A. 17 March 2012: Don't look for your happiness in other people. They will only let you down and make you feel hopeless. Whether you're single or attached, your true happiness lies within yourself. The day you discover this to be true is the day you will be truly ... (read in full...)
Is this guy back together with his ex or are they still just good friends?
Q. I met a really nice guy a couple of weeks ago and I really like him. We met for a coffee a few times before he moved a 3 hour drive away for work and we haven't really been in contact since. He broke up with girlfriend just before Christma...
A. 12 March 2012: They could be back together...Or they might just be friends.
Flip a coin.
Heads, they're back together, tails, they're friends. Who knows?
Whether they are friends or more is irrelevant. What is relevant is that since he moved away neither of ... (read in full...)
Have you ever smelled a perfume that enticed you?
Q. This question is for Women, but men are welcome too. Have you ever smelled a perfume that enticed you? ...
A. 11 March 2012: Well it certainly beats body odour in the old seduction stakes!
A nice smelling man makes me think, he looks after himself and makes an effort for me.... (read in full...)
Four days of no contact -- and we're supposed to marry next month?
Q. hey...i have written messages to my bf's ex and his good friend to whom he says was just an friend but they used to say love you and blah blah... and i wrote message to his ex being himself from his account that now i love my girl more and don't try ...
A. 10 March 2012: I think you need to apologise. You had no right to contact his ex/friend pretending to be him and telling her to back off. That tells me and him that you have no trust in him. You have just shown him how insecure and immature you are. He is marrying ... (read in full...)
My husband still works with his ex mistress
Q. I caught my husband of 16 years cheating on me last september with a woman who works in his office. He broke it off when I found out but he still works with her. I think about it everyday while he's at work. It torments me and I've told him that. ...
A. 27 August 2011: No I would feel the same as you. You won't be able to build any trust between you until he moves away from that office, away from her. Before you do that, I think you both need to explore the reasons behind his cheating whether you do that priv... (read in full...)
I've lost interest in my boyfriend. Should I break up with him?
Q. hi.... i am in a relationship with a boy since 4 years.. at the starting years of my relationship i was oh so lucky but now i feel bored with him and lost all my interest in him... i went out with him 3 times and everytime we end up getting physical ...
A. 27 August 2011: If you want to break-up with him, do it. It's simple. ... (read in full...)
Why did my boss do that? Is it a sign of love?
Q. hi,im an accountant in a private company.my boss was four grades senior than me and he looked very appealing and warm all the time...its been 6 months I got my job there. yesterday my boss sent me a message asking me to come to his cabin..it wa...
A. 24 August 2011: The bit that scares me (apart from "vergina") is that he took pictures of your naked body and gave you 100 bucks! Sounds like he treated you like a hooker. Why did you let him do this to you? Sorry I'd be worried about him showing pictures of you ... (read in full...)
Can I believe him even though these sites tell a different story?
Q. Really upset, i thought id found the man of my dreams now ive discovered him on fu##book and various other dating sites which were logged onto 2 weeks ago, the thing is we have been here before and he told me they were old sites which he couldn't ...
A. 23 August 2011: There's a reason for your paranoia. Don't ignore it.... (read in full...)
Can I date several men at the same time?
Q. need help from females After several years with the same man it appears the relationship is not going to move forward in any way. Id like to know if its is normal for a woman to date several guys at one time and how do I go about doing this. ...
A. 23 August 2011: You can do what you like as long as (a) it's not against the law and (b) your actions won't hurt anyone else. If you dating other men is going to hurt your ex and you really CAN'T resolve your issues, then you should end things properly before ... (read in full...)
Did he enjoy the sex or was I just another score?
Q. Hello! I got a friend that I gotten to know through work. We speak everyday and facebook casually. Well, people have been saying he likes me and even his best friend hinted to me. My responses are ''I don't think he does!'' The other day after 14 ...
A. 23 August 2011: What do you want him to do fill in a customer satisfaction survey?? I mean you told his best friend you didn't think he liked you then you had sex with him? What do you REALLY want to know? Whether he liked the sex? Or whether he likes you?... (read in full...)
Co-worker/friend is now backing away from me because we kissed!
Q. Hey all, could really do with some advise! So me and this guy have worked together for over 3 years and over that time become really good friends. We've always flirted etc but never acted upon anything as he's got a long term gf. Yesterday...
A. 23 August 2011: He has a girlfriend to think about and obviously he feels guilty about what he did. You shouldn't feel so bad about it, at least he didn't string you along and sleep with you before ending it.
I think the sensible thing to do is to forget a... (read in full...)
I'm 17. My family have banned me from seeing my 29 year old boyfriend
Q. Hey I'm 17 years old and live in England with my parents, brother and sister. I don't really get on with my family, my parents have said on numerous occasions that i'm a disappointment to them, and they favour the other two children over me. I ...
A. 22 August 2011: From what you say, your parents are doing a great job driving you away. Of course you love your boyfriend, he gives you all the love you crave but never received from your family. I do think that you are a little young to cut off all ties with yo... (read in full...)
Anyone understand the reasoning behind making high schoolers wake up so early?
Q. This really isn't a good dear cupid question but i have no where else to ask this. Does anyone know why they make high school students wake up so early as opposed to middle schoolers and elementary school students? In my school district, th...
A. 22 August 2011: Like other posts say it's to prepare you for adult life when you have to get up early and go to work. A few years ago I used to get up at 4:30am to commute to work and get there for 7:00am. Enjoy your teen years for as long as you can, believe... (read in full...)
I'm single and attracted to him, but I could never marry him for family reasons. What should I do?
Q. Hi friends, Few years back i used to work in a company.I had a colleague over there. After leaving that company we have been in contact through phones and mails. Now few days back he proposed me for marriage and told me that he used to like me very ...
A. 22 August 2011: If you know nothing lasting can come of this flirtation then why bother? If you play with fire you end up getting burned.... (read in full...)
I want a baby but my dad would be really angry with me
Q. I need some advice. Im an 18 year old women and although i know its still quite young me and my boyfriend of 14 months are so desperate for a family. I would love to have a baby i know how difficult it would be but im sure we would cope. He has a 2 ...
A. 18 August 2011: Why would your dad hit the roof? Does he not approve of your boyfriend? Maybe he is worried you will end up like his ex, on her own bringing up a child? Im sure your dad wants what's best for you and wants you to be financially stable before ... (read in full...)
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