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... Send *ostandalone a private message | | | *ostandalone's profile: I am a 32 year old male from the US and I have alot of general life experiences. What qualifies me to help other people is the fact that I am an observer of life. I am an avid reader and majoring in mathmatics and psycology doesn't hurt. I am currently single(going through a bad break-up). I just enjoy helping people and I am very open-minded. |
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I passed wind and my boyfriend dumped me!!!
Q. My fella has finished with me because i accidently passed wind!I said i was sorry but he wouldn't listen,he said i was disgusting.I really miss him,what shall i do?...
A. 7 September 2006: Yeah, I agree with everyone else. He's an ass!!! Forget him. I know its hard to do but easy to say. If thats all you did and he dumped you he wasn't serious anyway. Just think if he does get back with you and your relationship really has ... (read in full...)
Finding it hard being friends with my Ex, dont know if its worse to be friends or not to talk anymore ?
Q. This past weekend I spent more time with my ex boyfriend. At one point I became upset and told him that I thought that we shouldn't be friends anymore and he responded with you don't mean that. He became nervous at the fact that I was thinking ...
A. 5 September 2006: I don't know if I agree with helpful girl on this one. I think it is much harder to be your ex's friend when you have feelings for them and obviously you have feelings. You always want more than just a regular friend and it will bother the hell ... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant by giving a blow job???
Q. Is it possible to get pregnant by giving a guy a blow job?...
A. 1 September 2006: No you can't.... (read in full...)
I asked for permission to see somebody else and got a firm NO. What about the kids??
Q. I have been in a committed relationship with a man who won't totally commit for 13 years, we have 2 children and I still love him dearly. About 4 months ago I asked him to move out so we could have time to really think about our future, he readily ...
A. 1 September 2006: Well for the kids sake I would say stay with the father and make it work, BUT it has been 13 years and there is still no commitment. He has to dump or get off the pot. Why would you ask permission? Go out with him as friend and see were it leads. ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend had a baby with another now she doesn't want to see me?
Q. My girlfriend has just had a little girl to her best friend who she says she can't stand, I love her to death and i don't want to loose her but she doesn't want me near her just now. I keep thinking that she will leave me for the babies daddy what ...
A. 1 September 2006: You have to give more information. Why's she having his baby and not yours? Did you all break-up for a minute? Need more info?... (read in full...)
Badbrit, message to all those that may be fed up with my problem...
Q. Badbrit here, man who has peed everyone off with my problem and ignoring advice. I am now taking it, accepting it is over and she not want it anymore and has no interest. I accept it but will always feel she has done it wrong and it is purely b...
A. 1 September 2006: Wendyg, beautiful!!! I agree fully. The longer you hold on to this the more it will hurt and you're right you can't make someone grow up, but you can control your own actions. I hope that this thing works out well for you. I have been in your ... (read in full...)
We ended our physical relationship, we live together, still love each other, how can we date others when there is this connection ?
Q. Living together after a 9 year relationship breakup - HELP!! This is a followup question to a previous discussion because my partner and I did decide to officially break up after a 9 year relationship. We still love each other dearly, but as best ...
A. 1 September 2006: Sorry, I hit the "Add your answer" button before I was finished.
People like him feel like they have been in a relationship for so long that they are missing something out in the streets. In reality they are only fooling themselves into believin... (read in full...)
We ended our physical relationship, we live together, still love each other, how can we date others when there is this connection ?
Q. Living together after a 9 year relationship breakup - HELP!! This is a followup question to a previous discussion because my partner and I did decide to officially break up after a 9 year relationship. We still love each other dearly, but as best ...
A. 1 September 2006: This is a very difficult situation. Me personally, couldn't deal with it. Its hard enough being in the same city with the one you but being in the same house is unreal!!! One of you has to make a choice. Sometimes you have to lose in order to ... (read in full...)
Should I leave my current gf and get back with my ex-gf?
Q. Should I leave my current girlfriend and get back with my exgirlfriend? I've been with my current girlfriend for about 1 year now. In the begining, I thought I loved her. I am not sure if I do. I tried to tell my current girlfriend that ...
A. 1 September 2006: It seems to me that you broke up with your ex and found your current. You are still in love with your ex but the current was really good in bed so you stayed mistaking orgasm for love. Now that you have known this person outside of the bedroom she ... (read in full...)
Hes spending more time with his Ex than me... I dont want to give him a hard time, but I dont like it...
Q. Hi, Well Me and my boyfriend have been together nearly a year now his ex gilfreind who also happens to be my best friend are still friend yet at colledge he is spending more time with her than me he's an honest guy and everytime a speak to him about ...
A. 1 September 2006: I wouldn't say that he's cheating but you need to let it be known that you are uncomfortable with this. You can't stop someone from doing anything they want to do but you can control what they do to you. You can't continue to have these type of ... (read in full...)
I want him back but not sure the reason why ?
Q. i have recently split up with a guy who i was with for over a year, i want him back but i'm not sure if it's because i love him or because i feel secure with him, what should i do? ...
A. 1 September 2006: Evalutate exactly why you broke up. Thats the start. You have to know your exact reasoning for this because you don't want to get together with him again and then break-up later on down the road because of the same thing. For me security is a ... (read in full...)
How do i know if my husband is unfaithful?
Q. how do i know if my husband is unfaithful? He is suddenly not interested in sex. He critisizes me constantly He ogles other women. He wants to have a penis enlargement. He is suddenly working late often. He spends money (up to R1000) ev...
A. 29 August 2006: I'm sorry but it sounds fishy to me too. There is always a routine that he follows. Break it. Pop up at his job when he is working late and bring dinner. When he ogles other women call him on it because thats direspectful. Don't pressure him ... (read in full...)
Why wouldnt he have called me ?
Q. there was this really reaLLY fit guy that i was seeing, we went out on 2 dates and we talked on the phone and we went to the pictures and i gave him a hand job and then he went quiet and called me less and less and now he doesnt call me anymore and ...
A. 29 August 2006: Looks like he got what he wanted. You're not completely done though. He'll call you when he wants another hand job or something of the sort. Thats just one take. There could be alot of other reasons also but off the top of my head thats what I ... (read in full...)
I dont think im as happy as I should be, and keep have dreams of an old flame......
Q. Dear cupid agony aunt, Before I begin, I'd like to point out that I am a (perhaps excessively) caring and considerate man, and so advising me to simply 'leave and move on' will unfortunately be useless. I've been with my girlfriend for almost...
A. 29 August 2006: Seems tough. Been there before. I had the same feelings before and found that everything that I desired in that other person I already had at home. The thing is you're more hung up on what could have been or what might have happened. If you ... (read in full...)
I can't stand to be Just Friends with my ex. It's doing my head in. So how do I tell her?
Q. OK so here's the situation: I realized I need some space from my ex who broke up with me but promised there's a definite chance for us in the future. I've been trying for 2 months now, but it's just way too stressful being around her now and I ...
A. 22 August 2006: Thats a hard thing to do trust me. Because you are always going to want more. I think Andy J had the best advice. Do things to take your mind off of her. Don't contact her and don't make an effort to see her. She's not bothered by you right ... (read in full...)
I was clingy and paranoid so she ended it with me but she said there is a second chance in the future!
Q. My girlfriend broke up with me for being clingy and paranoid every now and then, but i've stopped being clingy and paranoid now. After that I asked my her for a second chance to prove myself to her and she said that she DOES believe in second ...
A. 22 August 2006: I went through this with my ex but different circumstances. She told me she hadn't ruled out a second chance. I thought is was just a lame excuse to see other guys or be available when a guy she liked came along. You're putting yourself in a ... (read in full...)
I'm out of my mind with worry... Could swallowing have gotten me pregnant?
Q. I feel a bit stupid for asking this question..but here goes. Is there any possible way that you can get pregnant from swallowing a man's semen when he ejaculates? I've given my boyfriend a blowjob a few times and swallowed everytime. I'm o...
A. 19 August 2006: No you can't so stop worrying.... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my sister in law...
Q. I love my siste in law what can I do? I was married 7 years ago and I am 30 now I have a son and love my wife. But I have 3 sisters in law but I feel love to one of them she is 22 now. I find this love when I feel her watching me and every t...
A. 18 August 2006: I agree fully with babygirl and you two are playing with fire. You will do more harm than good. By even contemplating leaving your wife for her sister is totally selfish. Real men do what they must not always what they want. Be man and leave her ... (read in full...)
I had an affair now my marriage has changed and my daughter was there...
Q. I was just beginning to get a normal happy life back and for some odd reason I wanted an affair one day. I had sex with another guy and destroyed my marriage. My husband does not know yet and it was only a week ago, but I can already tell my ...
A. 18 August 2006: I don't get it. The only question I would have as that man would be why? Was the marriage bad before your affair or only after and if its the latter than you are to blame. You need to tell him the truth and I agree with soulsista that telling him ... (read in full...)
She I be upset because he said I was "funny"???
Q. My husband came home from work and told me that he was at work and his friend was telling my husband how nice his wifes body was, and I asked my husband what he said to his friend about me, and my husband responded by saying, he didnt want to talk ...
A. 18 August 2006: I for one would not even have that kind of discussion with another male about my wife. I don't want them to stare at her or look for the things that I have described. I mean I'm sure other men who will look but I wouldn't want to be the one who ... (read in full...)
My teacher told me that I'm the kinda girl he would want to marry one day... Then we hooked up in his car!
Q. I need some advice.This is a long story Im a 16 yr old gurl and i have this teacher who is 23. He is so hot and extremely nice and we always flirted with eachother and i always liked him and still do like him heaps. He told me that i was the kind of ...
A. 18 August 2006: I know that you feel like this is love and he loves you but honestly its wrong. Not because of your feelings or his but he is your teacher lets not forget that and you're only 16 lets not forget that either. Its statutory rape!!! You know this ... (read in full...)
Just friends or does she want sex???
Q. I have recently been on holiday with my parents and my cousin came along with her parents too as our parents do get along. i am male and i am 18 and i admit that i do like her in more than just friends. A little background info is that she is actu...
A. 18 August 2006: Duuuuuuh!!!!!! Yes she wanted something? It wasn't friendship. I don't one female friend who would get wear a towel around me. I don't know if the fact that they don't like me that well or uncomfortable doing such. I have talked about sex with ... (read in full...)
His mobile tells the tale and I'm worried he's cheating...
Q. Me and my bf have been goin out for 9 months, but he is quite funny when it comes to his mobile phone, he never keeps it out, its always in his pocket and lately keeps it on vibrate. About 3 months ago, i found texts on his phone from another gir...
A. 17 August 2006: You're worried for good reason. I approved your question and as I was reading it for approval I said to myself he is definitely up to something. I'm not saying that he is cheating fully but he is setting the environment for speculation. I did all ... (read in full...)
calling all agony aunts
Q. right i know this is going to sound so strange but i really need someones advice/help. when i get upset about sumthing that i can't handle i tend to take it out on myself, whether its not eating, throwing up etc its just always seemed to help when ...
A. 17 August 2006: Like Baby Girl, I to am one of the moderators and this is borderline on approved/unapproved. It seems to me that you do have a problem. Far be it for me to diagnose you as to what that is, because I am not a professional in that area of expertise. ... (read in full...)
I want to hook up with his brother coz he's more intellectual and good looking!
Q. I've been with my bf for 4 months. he has never set my world alight but is a nice dependable and funny guy and I thought I would have a stab at being a sensible adult for once and see if love blossomed. It hasn't. Yet for some reason I have hung in ...
A. 17 August 2006: What is your problem? Think of the position you put the brother and the family in a whole. Okay say you do dump your boyfriend and start dating his brother wouldn't Saturday nights at his parents house be a little awkward? You will not be ... (read in full...)
We have been together 5 years, she tells me her heart is with her ex husband and stays with me for security!
Q. Her heart is with her ex husband,she says she is with me for security ,we have been together for 5 years and nothing has changed. She apparently stays on his couch once in a while when I am out of town. should I run or stay ?...
A. 17 August 2006: MY GOD MAN!!! I have to commend you for doing something I couldn't do you have been made an ass out of. I mean how many times do you have to get slapped in your face to realize it hurts or at least duck to keep from getting hit again. My heart ... (read in full...)
I thought "what happens at camp stays at camp"... but now I think I did the wrong thing :-(
Q. well, i cheated on my bf while i was at camp. it was for the last week, and i deffently dont have feelings for this guy anymore. me and my bf almost never get to see each other durring the summer, and its hard on me because i love him soo much. so ...
A. 17 August 2006: There is no light way to break someone's heart and if he loves you like you love him than it will break his heart. But if you want to feel that the way you tell him is light or efficient enough to keep dating you, then tell him how you would want ... (read in full...)
How to suss a cheater?
Q. Do you think counting condoms are a clear way to find out if someone is cheating..find one or two missing. is that a clear and definite sign that a person should break up...or other signs are better ways to see-such as how affectionate, excuses, not ...
A. 16 August 2006: I don't think he's cheating by what you have said here but to catch a cheater you must know a cheater, I guess that makes me the man for the job. Not to make light of it but I did cheat on my ex ONCE and it never happened again but I will give you ... (read in full...)
Hes still seeing the ex and is VERY much in contact! Should I stay or walk away ?
Q. I have known my partner as a friend for 4 years. We became an item on New Years Eve then at the end of January he called it off to go back to his ex. he was back in feb and we gave it another go. We were happy and got engaged in June, then went ...
A. 16 August 2006: All I can say to accent the rest of the advice already posted is this, he doesn't believe you!!! Why should he? He has slept with this woman in your bed, continuously calls and texts her and you keep forgiving him and taking him back, Why? I ... (read in full...)
Age difference is creating problems with starting a family
Q. I am a 22 year old girl, in a serious relationship with a 32 year old man. We have been together for 3 1/2 years and broght a house together 18 months ago. Everything is going well but I now have growing concerns about our age difference... We b...
A. 16 August 2006: I'm confused by one aspect. Being together for 3-1/2 years wouldn't you all have talked about this already? I mean I know marriage came up so of course children would have too. Anyway, children don't make things impossible to do, they just add ... (read in full...)
We broke up and I still love her and am still sleeping with her!
Q. please ladies help me I going crazy. Me and my ex girlfriend were together 4 about a year. After 2 months of being broken up and no contact she called me out of the blue and we hung out one night and had sex with each other. It's been about a week ...
A. 16 August 2006: I went through that with my ex. Eventually, I had to just ask her what is it that she wants. She said she didn't want to be in a relationship and we should remain friends. That lasted for about 10 seconds!!! Its best to just talk to her and come ... (read in full...)
Mums the word
Q. Hi everyone - I really don't know if this sort of question fits on this website, but I'm not sure where else to turn that I won't get a biased answer (my mom makes me feel guilty about every decision I make - long story - so I don't want to ask her ...
A. 16 August 2006: Anon, something similar happened to me 2 years ago. I had a chance to see my grandmother for a memorial day weekend in Memphis (I live in Dallas). I passed it up for a weekend here and she died a day after memorial day. It tore me up inside for ... (read in full...)
I'm having sex with my ex, and I don't know what it means!
Q. My ex and I recently broke up. I was heartbroken and wanted him back bad. He told me he cares about me but just cant be in a relationship right now. He said he wants me in his life and wants me to be a close friend. So, i tried to do as he wants. I ...
A. 15 August 2006: I agree with the ladies on this one. You are no more than sex to him. Think about it. He has his cake and eating it too. He can go out with anyone he wants and still have you around for whatever. What guy doesn't want that? No one will buy the ... (read in full...)
He wants the other woman. But he wants to hang out here until she gets back from her holiday. Kick him out now or what?
Q. Just to give you an update on what's been happening over the last week. The last time I wrote I told you I was confused about my ex who I had just got back with after nearly 4 years apart. He was acting very suspicious and sneaking around with the ...
A. 15 August 2006: If thats your place then don't ask him to leave tell him to. Don't make it convenient for him as he has not been a walk in the park for you. You are showing sympathy and he hasn't. He used you for a break from this woman and now that he wants her ... (read in full...)
She's got me confused, so what do you think is going on here? Is she interested?
Q. i have NO idea what to make of this girl. i can't read her. we've hooked up before but decided it was a bad idea to do it again because the timing wasn't right. she was in a relationship. anyway, now she's talking to me about how her ...
A. 15 August 2006: Just a word to the wise. How you get her is the same way you will lose her. I personally wouldn't be able to trust her. I mean she did "hook-up" with you while she was still with him. Is that her way of solving problems in relationships? Is ... (read in full...)
My ex is threatening to tell my new bf about my past cheating! What can I do?
Q. i have a 2 year ld daughter with my ex but now am living with my new partner who has taken my child on as his own. I have cheated several times with my ex, even in our house! Now i swore it wouldn`t happen again and it hasn`t and i wanna be faithful ...
A. 15 August 2006: Well, thats just it. Thats your past and thats your ex. If I were you I would tell him myself as you did make those mistakes. Now, you have a chance to start over again and if you let your ex blackmail you into doing what he wants who knows how ... (read in full...)
Not sure if the baby is my guys, or one of the guys I slept with in between!!...
Q. i'm 19 and have a one year old son. I broke up with my partner last year in December as he was violent. Although we were'nt together we continued to have sex. But unknown to him i have slept with other men. Now i have just found out i am ...
A. 15 August 2006: Personally, I think you should just tell him the truth. If it were me I would want to know. He will be upset but you said you had broken up for a minute and you slept with other men. He probably slept with other women. He will be hurt but he ... (read in full...)
I've been a cheating wife, but should I confess my affair with my husband's friend?
Q. hey,I need your opinions and advice, about a month ago i slept with My husbands friend.The problems that led to this are so many to go into so heres the short version: basically after 12yrs of being married to My Husband I felt I was worth so muc...
A. 3 August 2006: I think you should tell him. At least to clear your own mind. If you want to start fresh and live a good life the healing has to start now. Put everything on the table. For God's sake stop calling this guy your husband's friend because he is ... (read in full...)
I'd like to find out if my acquaintence has a girlfriend. How?
Q. Hi, I like this guy. He comes into my work for a couple of hours a week to work with the young people. The last time he was in we really got talking and I wouldnt mind getting to know him better!! I'm not sure if he has a girlfriend thoug...
A. 3 August 2006: You should just ask him. I mean what is there to lose. If he does there is no reason why you two can't still be friends. ... (read in full...)
He broke up with me but is happy to "see each other". Now I find this txt...
Q. Me and my boyfriend were going out for over a year when he decided he didn't want to go out with me anymore but for us to "see each other" instead. This meant either of us could do whatever we wanted and be with whoever we wanted but still see each ...
A. 3 August 2006: Once again I'm left agreeing with Pete. You are being used. I am going thru something similar. As Pete said he has all the control. I bet he calls you speratically and acts nonchalant in conversations. You have to get out of this in a hurry!!! ... (read in full...)
I caught him cheating; will he always be a cheater?
Q. My bf and I have been together 3 years, but last year I learned that he had been unfaithful and although it hurt very much, I decided to stay with him and try and work through our problems. The last year has been hard but we have had good times and ...
A. 3 August 2006: Great advice immuno. I agree 100%. Just tell him how you feel without bringing up the past. You have to look forward to the future and not live in the past. I for one have made that mistake and try desperately to prove that it won't happen ... (read in full...)
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