He found a smudge on the wall .........
Q. I have been living with my partner for 10 years. We have 2 kids. My name is not on anything because I am trying to up my credit score (bad credit). He is an ocd neat freak. I am messy. The house isn't a nightmare, but it's not pristine either. He ...
A. 14 May 2014: Just because your name is not on the lease, he can't just kick you out on the street. You've become a common law resident of that dwelling. You'd at least have enough time to find a new place, worst case scenario, if he tried to get you to leave. I ... (read in full...)
BF won't show me his phone
Q. Here is a brief bit of background to shed some light frist. My current boyfriend once lied to me and I forgave him but I am finding it incredibly hard to forget in the way that he wants me to. This is most difficult when it comes to his behaviuor...
A. 14 May 2014: I think that in order to get your relationship back on the right track, you should not expect to look through his phone and learn to trust him again.
Feeling like you're entitled to go through his personal property to prove he's not lying is... (read in full...)
How can I get my mother to view my fiance and upcoming wedding more positively?
Q. My Mother is completely against my future marriage and it's creating a lot of arguments/tension/and anger. My mom lives overseas, so she has never met my fiance. I have tried to tell her about him and the wonderful guy I think she is, she barely w...
A. 12 May 2014: As a gay woman, I can completely relate to how it feels to not be accepted by parents or have your own parents not accept your choice of partners. It wouldn't matter if my partner was a brain surgeon or if she made minimum wage with no education. My ... (read in full...)
Why would a girl date me when she isnt over her ex?
Q. I have met a girl online and we are going on a date tomorrow i know I shouldn't but I have been looking at her online activity and I saw her boyfriend had broken up with her 1 month ago. I was looking more into it and she put online just hours ago ...
A. 12 May 2014: That's just shitty. I'm sorry to hear that. ... (read in full...)
I told her I couldn't be with her anymore because she is married and she didn't take it well!
Q. Hi everyone, I have been dating a married woman who is in a same-sex marriage. We have only been dating for a month and a half and I have already fallen for her. We have done a lot of stuff together and she has never treated me as her mistress. ...
A. 11 May 2014: You continue to hurt and let it go. What's the other alternative? To stay with her and never truly be with her? You will always be second to her wife as long as they are together.
There is no other alternative than to hurt and move on. Give it ... (read in full...)
I ruined my second chance.
Q. so cupid, Recently, my boyfriend and I broke up for the second time. things that happened: In the past, I have cheated, and I paid for my actions, I was devastated. so that led to this girl in my class who's in his class, and she's been feeding ...
A. 10 May 2014: So from his end of the spectrum - you cheated, you kept talking to the guy you cheated with, and you were unwilling to compromise? I'm not so sure, given those circumstances, I'd be willing to go back, either.
At this point in my life, if someo... (read in full...)
Why would a girl date me when she isnt over her ex?
Q. I have met a girl online and we are going on a date tomorrow i know I shouldn't but I have been looking at her online activity and I saw her boyfriend had broken up with her 1 month ago. I was looking more into it and she put online just hours ago ...
A. 10 May 2014: Why would she date someone when she isn't over her ex? Could she be just using me? Yes and yes.
She's dating you because you are her rebound; someone to get her mind off of her ex. Yes, she is using you. That's not to say she couldn't wind up ... (read in full...)
Mum as wingman, good or bad idea?
Q. I hope this doesn't sound bad, but does anyone see anything wrong with going to places with your mother a lot ?. My mother and I have been to a lot of gigs together over the years. I am 30 and she is 55. I guess sometimes people can think that a ...
A. 10 May 2014: I see absolutely nothing wrong with hanging out with your mom. If you two have that close of a relationahip, more power to you. Sounds awesome.
If you are interested in making friends and meeting people while you're out, however, you may just nee... (read in full...)
She broke up with me because of anxiety, but doesn't want to give me details
Q. Hi, I am was dating a girl who I got on really well. One day she called it off. Not in the usual way, it sounded quite strange. Anyway, she has kept in touch with me for quite a while now. She sounds like she wants to date again. When I asked ...
A. 10 May 2014: Exactly what Cerberus said. It's honestly not really your business until she's comfortable enough to tell you what's going on. I dated my gf for six months before she confided in me about her mental health issues. She just had to be comfortable with ... (read in full...)
He said I shouldn't have "put all my eggs in one basket" after I told him what I thought about him! What should I do now?
Q. Hi everyone I split up with my bf of four years six months ago. I'm 25. The split was amicable as we both wanted different things. For two months I've been chatting to a guy online. We chat most days and I really like him. We've spoke on ...
A. 9 May 2014: I don't blame you for being a bit hurt. It sounds as if he somewhat misled you, as you say you both agreed not to see other people until you met one another to determine your feelings. So I can't blame you for feeling disappointed.
At the same... (read in full...)
I am fed up of arguing about her wanting breast enlargement surgery!
Q. Hi everyone, I need some advice on a frustrating situation that I am in. About 7 months ago I had a breast enlargement. At 22 I was fed up of feeling self conscious, unhappy and miserable about my body. I never ever developed more than buddin...
A. 8 May 2014: Why are you even arguing with her over it? Who's to say she's copying you or trying to out do you? Maybe seeing your awesome results inspired her to want hers done also.
You say it wasn't for attention that you wanted to get yours done, yet you ... (read in full...)
Is the new hair, the underwear for the gym, and texting her friends for her pleasure or for someone else's?
Q. Ok over 2months ago me and my girlfriend joined a gym together thought it would bring us closer which it didn't cause I wanted to use the weights and she was only the light equipment for the first few weeks we went 2 times a week then our kids had ...
A. 8 May 2014: It sounds like she has a crush on her trainer. When people go out of their way to change their hairstyle and buy new underwewar and make sure they bathe and look their best right before they see someone new, most likely means they are trying to ... (read in full...)
Why is she taking birth control?
Q. I'm in a LDR, my girlfriend and I are in different countries due to school and we can see each other every three months or so. she is on the pill. why would a girl be on birth control if she is not supposed to be sexually active?...
A. 6 May 2014: Period regulation. My girlfriend is on birth control and believe me, it's not because she's afraid I'm going to knock her up lol. ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be a gay man.
Q. How do people accept being gay so easily? I'm starting to think I'm gay but I don't want to be. Sure I could pretend to be straight for the rest of my life but I'm not sure if that's what I want but I don't want to lead a gay lifestyle either. I ...
A. 6 May 2014: As a gay female, I can relate. But only so far. I didn't grow up in a super conservative town where people bashed gay people. And all of my closest friends turned out, ironically, to be gay, themselves. I came out of the closet when I was in ... (read in full...)
Should I ask him why he exaggerated the length of time he was single and why he led me to believe he's been living by himself?
Q. I'll try to keep this short Basically I met, dated and fell for this amazing man roughly two months ago. Never have I connected so well with someone, shared so many likes and tastes with, which he reciprocates. During this time frame we've got ...
A. 6 May 2014: You shouldn't be worried about if he loved his ex more, so much as the fact that he bold-faced lied to you. That's a huge red flag.
You should definitely confront him about this. You should also take a step back for a while. You say he's your fir... (read in full...)
Was I right to conclude that he isn't over his ex?
Q. I am so confused. I met a guy I used to date 25 years ago on facebook, we fell immediately back in love. He is separated and from what both he and his family tells me, his soon to be ex is a horrible person. I have witness first hand. She texts ...
A. 6 May 2014: You definitely did the right thing. Good for you. It's always best to wait until the divorce is final to start dating. In this case, he clearly doesn't seem over her. Stick to your guns. ... (read in full...)
Is he right -- am I being selfish?
Q. Im in need of some advice, i been with a guy for 7 years and is has been a roll coaster. i feel like he is so selfish and only cares about himself but yet again, he says im selfish. we are in a long distance relationship hes in florida and im in new ...
A. 5 May 2014: I'm confused. So what exactly is he doing to build your future together? Asking you for money? So he's building your future with your money? Yet you're supposed to be grateful? And he also thinks you'll never find another man to do this for you?? ... (read in full...)
My relationship is very far removed from the fireworks and sweeping me off my feet that I'd ideally want from a man of my dreams. Am I being unrealistic?
Q. I'm a ridiculous romantic but starting to think life just doesn't live up to my ideals. Im currently seeing someone and we didn't have a great start (commitment issues that left me questioning his feelings for me). Things are now moving very slowly ...
A. 5 May 2014: You're being unrealistic. If you expect it to be all hearts and flowers at all times, you will be very unhappy in love and relationships.
Now don't get me wrong - it shouldn't be extremely hard and overwhelming. You should be compatible and enjo... (read in full...)
Is this how a booty call works or not?
Q. So Aunts and Uncles.. I had sex with a guy laat night. He's my sisters friend and I like to consider it a "booty call" and thought we were on the same page. Well we stopped by Walmart afterward and he kept holding my hand and kissing me in public. ...
A. 5 May 2014: Sounds interested to me. ... (read in full...)
Has "nice guy" become a derogatory term?
Q. It seems like when you call someone a "nice guy" it seems as if it has some sort of negative connotation to it as if it is synonymous with loser, wimp, geek/nerd, pushover etc. basically anything that would be viewed as unattractive to the opposite ...
A. 4 May 2014: I suppose the same could be generalized about men with women. Why would men prefer to go for the stereotypical dumb blonde who bats her eye lashes and can't complete a full thought? Who relies 100% on her looks to get things from men and never has ... (read in full...)
Has "nice guy" become a derogatory term?
Q. It seems like when you call someone a "nice guy" it seems as if it has some sort of negative connotation to it as if it is synonymous with loser, wimp, geek/nerd, pushover etc. basically anything that would be viewed as unattractive to the opposite ...
A. 4 May 2014: I agree with mark1978. My guy friends with the hot wives are just simply plain old good dudes. But his explanation between nice guys and "nice guys" nails it on the head. ... (read in full...)
Has "nice guy" become a derogatory term?
Q. It seems like when you call someone a "nice guy" it seems as if it has some sort of negative connotation to it as if it is synonymous with loser, wimp, geek/nerd, pushover etc. basically anything that would be viewed as unattractive to the opposite ...
A. 4 May 2014: I don't think so whatsoever. In fact, I have some guy friends who are just that - classic "nice guys." Both of them are married to seriously hot, beautiful women. So it really just depends on the way this so-called "nice guy" carries himself. If he ... (read in full...)
He has bipolar, and sometimes I feel more like a caregiver than a girlfriend
Q. I posted this on another thread. I was replying to someone else who had posted about their problem, and I thought I would start a thread about my own problem. I'm not sure what to do about this situation with him, and I would appreciate some ...
A. 4 May 2014: You're blaming yourself for his illness. This is something you can't do to yourself. It's not your fault he's suffering from bipolar disorder. None of this is your fault. You're both grown adults. There's nothing you can do to make a grown man do ... (read in full...)
He has bipolar, and sometimes I feel more like a caregiver than a girlfriend
Q. I posted this on another thread. I was replying to someone else who had posted about their problem, and I thought I would start a thread about my own problem. I'm not sure what to do about this situation with him, and I would appreciate some ...
A. 3 May 2014: Believe me, I can completely relate. Being with someone suffering, unmedicated, with a mental disorder such as bipolar, is extremely tough for both parties. He's suffering, too.
It sounds like he's in the depressed stage at the moment, where he... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never invites me to his parties
Q. Hello all. Well, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years and have known him well for about 7 years. Last year he decorated his backyard. I picked out the pool which is the staple of the backyard. I picked out most all of the furniture, ...
A. 3 May 2014: The fact that you helped him pick out the decorations of the backyard are irrelevant. But the fact that your boyfriend has guests over and then lies to you about it? That's what's BS. If I were throwing a party, I couldn't imagine not wanting my ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me and has no reason for doing so
Q. I am so devastated, I am not sure what to think or what happened. I have been with my boyfriend for two years, we are the same age, we both have children (no children together) but out of the blue.... he broke up with me. I asked for a reason he had ...
A. 3 May 2014: Completely agree with female anon.
I can't say why he did this. Only you can take a stab at that based on what he told you during your talk. But you MUST go no contact from this point on. If you attempt to communicate with him, you will most lik... (read in full...)
I thought we got on really well but she hasn't returned my calls
Q. Met this girl through dating app a month ago things went well we got emotionally connected we both had really fun times and we get along really well. So she came over for the weekend on sat night we went out to dinner and drank few. Then we cam...
A. 3 May 2014: To be honest, if I was just getting to know someone (which I think you two moved really fast for the weekend stay over) and they pouted like that over me not being in the mood for sex and rolled over, pissed off, and ignored me, I'd be extremely put ... (read in full...)
Is it OK for married people to have opposite sex friends?
Q. Simple question ; after you get married and settled down, is it okay to have friends of the opposite sex? Text them? Hang out with them? Strictly platonic that is....
A. 28 April 2014: My ex had a close 'friend' for a long time. Except that it was a well-known fact that this friend liked my girlfriend. Always let it be known. Any time we would have a fight, of course, that friend was always right on over! I expressed my discomfort ... (read in full...)
Over 30 and single - what did I do wrong?
Q. Every girl dreams of the happy family and nice man that they will one day marry. We are taught from an early age that the Princess always ends up with the Handsome Prince. The scatty girl in the Rom-Com always finds her true love. Your best friends ...
A. 28 April 2014: "Another friend got engaged last week. I went round to see her, and all I had was the ring shoved in my face, and just a constant stream of wedding talk. I am happy that she is happy, I just wish she wouldn't rub it in. I came home and cried my eyes ... (read in full...)
Over 30 and single - what did I do wrong?
Q. Every girl dreams of the happy family and nice man that they will one day marry. We are taught from an early age that the Princess always ends up with the Handsome Prince. The scatty girl in the Rom-Com always finds her true love. Your best friends ...
A. 28 April 2014: I feel as though you are fantacizing and romanticizing love and marriage. I completely understand that you want to get married. After all, human beings are social creatures by nature. However, not every single woman dreams of meeting the right man ... (read in full...)
Is it OK for married people to have opposite sex friends?
Q. Simple question ; after you get married and settled down, is it okay to have friends of the opposite sex? Text them? Hang out with them? Strictly platonic that is....
A. 28 April 2014: Well, seeing as how I date the same sex, I'll answer this in reference to the preffered sex.
Of course it's okay to be friends with someone of your preferred sex while married (or committed). But that also all depends on how you both define p... (read in full...)
Why do guys tease women they find attractive?
Q. What does this mean? This guy playfully teases me but he only does it in the presence of others, mainly men. Alone he's nice. I find some of it funny. He says stuff like it's raining outside it's your fault don't know why, he's obviously joking ...
A. 28 April 2014: It's because they're still stuck in the kindergarten phase where you tease and are mean to the girls you like. I know a handful of guys like this. They wind up pissing the girl off more than anything. Lol.
Sounds like he may like you. But he s... (read in full...)
I give them 110% but they still leave
Q. hi aunts and uncles, been a long time since i have been on here. i was left for a yonger woman, and thought it to be not right. i waited two years to get out and meet other guys, i finally met a guy who ended up being 18 years younger than me. we ...
A. 28 April 2014: You didn't specify how old the other man who left you for a younger woman was. However, if you have a habit of dating younger men, like the guy you're currently seeing, I would say this could be your 'problem.'
For example, if your current ... (read in full...)
Am I a pan-romantic lesbian?
Q. Ok so. I really do like guys a lot. And I kinda thought I was pansexual but honestly no matter how much I do like guys I never ever ever want to have srx with a guy and have never been sexually attracted to a guy. I think I might be a pan romantic ...
A. 27 April 2014: I have no clue what any of those terms mean, and I'm even a lesbian!
I think you're too worried about labeling yourself at this point in your life. If you can't imagine having sex with a man, it could mean you're only into women. or it could me... (read in full...)
My wife wants a separation. How can make her love me again?
Q. Been married for 28 years - have two teenage children. My wife has said she has no feelings for me any longer and wants to separate. I am so hurt and upset. She has admitted the separation is purely selfish on her part but does not want to thin...
A. 27 April 2014: I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this.
The death of her sibling may have something to do with this, however, I don't think it's the main cause. Nor the money issue directly. I think it was her siblings death that INDIRECTLY caused t... (read in full...)
Why is my boyfriend secretly meeting up with my ex friend, when we agreed not to see her?
Q. I've got (had) a good friend who made it clear she liked my boyfriend. She instantly liked him but whenever we had an argument she would always side with him and text him make sure he was OK and I wouldn't hear from her for ages! One time she w...
A. 26 April 2014: Everything anonymous said. He loves the attention and flattery he gets from this pathetic "friend" of yours.
I would have a really hard time chewing on this. It might be something I'd consider breaking up over because that's just plain deceptiv... (read in full...)
I am not sure if its worth investing the time or not ....
Q. Hi everyone, I ended a two year relationship within the last six months. I feel like I've finally accepted what our relationship was and why it didn't work and feel like I'm able to move on. About two months ago, I met someone and we had th...
A. 26 April 2014: I would play it by ear. See how your visit with him goes, and if it's awesome, then maybe another six months will seem worth it to you. Or maybe it won't. But I would want to see how the visit went first before I made that decision.
Perso... (read in full...)
I'm done, I want him out, how do I end this relationship?
Q. Hi all, I want to end my relationship with my partner. We have a baby of 10 months and he is drinking again. Binge drinkng, this is day 7 and he has wee'd the bed twice this week. I have weighed up the pro's and con's and the only pro I have ...
A. 25 April 2014: Simple. Tell him to get out. It's your place. If he says no, call the police. If you are concerned with what his response will be, get a male friend to come over and stand guard until it's over. That way, he won't act crazy.
As for the baby. Yo... (read in full...)
I'm feeling jealous and angry towards my girlfriend!
Q. I am 21, i have been dating a girl for almost a year now. We love each other and we love to be around each other.she is very social, goes to the bar a lot with her friends amongst other activities. But lately I find myelf frustrated and lonely. I ...
A. 24 April 2014: Communication. It's one thing to feel angry and jealous, and another to learn how to properly channel those emotions. You have to be able to talk to her calmly about how you're feeling without getting angry and pissed.
You say you see her two ... (read in full...)
My life is a mess! How do I tell my parents that I've failed my degree and won't be graduating after all?
Q. Hi Everyone, I've been following this website for a few years and always been impressed by the advice given so thought I would give it a go. Please don't judge me in my problems, I need help. So nearly 4 years ago, I was in a relationship, my...
A. 24 April 2014: At sambrad - suffering from sexual abuse is something that still affects women years and years later. Sometimes, it doesn't even start causing side effects until a handful of years later, rearing it's head in the form of PTSD. Not putting your ... (read in full...)
My life is a mess! How do I tell my parents that I've failed my degree and won't be graduating after all?
Q. Hi Everyone, I've been following this website for a few years and always been impressed by the advice given so thought I would give it a go. Please don't judge me in my problems, I need help. So nearly 4 years ago, I was in a relationship, my...
A. 24 April 2014: I can't directly relate to what you're going through personally, but from what my girlfriend experiences and has experienced in the past, and from seeing how similar experiences have affected her very similarly to how they've affected you, I can ... (read in full...)
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