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*eanne.od agony aunt

*eanne.od

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life's too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't, believe that everything happens for a reason. if you get a chance, take it. if it changes your life, then let it. nobody said it'd be easy; they just promised that it would be worth it.

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How do I get over my nervousness of asking someone out?

Q.   How do I get over my nervousness of asking someone out? (They have done it on the occassions before!)...

A.   20 September 2007: then what you need to do is work out why you think the relationship could work if there is a big distance anyway... (read in full...)

What could I do to get him to open up to me and feel more comfortable with the age difference?

Q.   I'm a seventeen year old girl and I have a major crush on a 23 year old guy. He's shy and is a very private person, and I've been trying to slowly get him out of his shell and talk to him. I have him as one of my friends on myspace, and I've...

A.   20 September 2007: a guy will rarely confess his feelings and emotions to anybody. they prefer to hide them or make a mockery of them rather than openly talk about them. the best thing you can do is tell him you are always there if he needs to talk and you can be ... (read in full...)

Is it legal to have a sexual relationship with your teacher if you are 18??

Q.   is it legal to have a sexual relationship with your teacher if you are 18?? ...

A.   20 September 2007: considering your age tag reads 16-17, i'm presuming you are not 18? a teacher will never have a relationship with a former student regardless of their age because they have a profession where they are deemed upholding members of the community, it ... (read in full...)

I'm way too into sex. Should I fulfill my desires on the guy next to me?

Q.   Im way to interested in sex, even tho ive had a baby. what should i do, fulfill my desires on the boi next to me, or wait.? may baby is 4 n a half moths old...

A.   20 September 2007: focus all your attention onto your baby. she/he won't be a baby fr long and you need to treasure this time because you won't get back. you have all your life to fulfil your desires but only a couple of years to appreciate this baby and its undy... (read in full...)

I know I can be her ideal guy but what can I do to get her to hook up with me?

Q.   Dear, cupid i'm so confused please help me. There's this girl that i'm crazy about. we met about 5 years ago. we r the best friends she knows how i feel about her. I know deep down she feels the same i'm so convinced that we where made 4 each other. ...

A.   20 September 2007: sometimes friendship is better than a relationship because there is no trials and tribulations and awkwardness if you split up. unfortunately you cannot pressure her or make her have feelings for you which she mustn't have if she has told you she ... (read in full...)

I'm having an affair with a man 20 yrs older than me. What will be our future?

Q.   im 20 year girl. i have a boyfriend whose 40 years old. he is got married in novmber 2006.we have our relation from past 4 years.we stay in one house.our parents doenst know about it.we had sex several times.so what will be our future. i dont want ...

A.   20 September 2007: i'm sorry but if he got married, does that not imply he doesn't want to be with you full time? commitment is important and he married someone else. i understand your circumstance, i've had an affair with a married man but he was already married ... (read in full...)

How do I get over my nervousness of asking someone out?

Q.   How do I get over my nervousness of asking someone out? (They have done it on the occassions before!)...

A.   20 September 2007: everyones fear of rejection clouds there ability to approach the opposite sex, but put it into perspective, what's the worst that could happen? she could say no, and if that happens, pick yourself up and move on. focus on the fact that girls ar... (read in full...)

How can I be confident when its obvious most guys are better looking than me?

Q.   I’m self-conscious about my looks. How can I be confident when it’s obvious most guys are better looking than me? I have a friend who is approaching 50 in age, and who's not exactly "dashingly handsome." He's not ugly, but it's obvious that he's not...

A.   20 September 2007: confidence works wonders. this guy knows he's not brad pitt but acts like god's gift because girls like a man to feel happy in themselves. if you are insecure about the way you look, shell feel intimidated and that'll scare her aware. unbele... (read in full...)

Should I be worried about him not being interested in me anymore?

Q.   I have been with my bf for one year now and he has been wonderful. Lately he has been under alot of stress with work and hasnt been interested in being with me. Should I worry about him not being intertested in me anymore? Is it okay to ask the guy ...

A.   20 September 2007: maybe if he under alot of stress, that is the sole reason but if his mood is directed towards you, it could be more than that. he'll probably lash out at you if you question his behaviour but you need to for your own peace of mind. it could ... (read in full...)

We had a perfect sex life at the start. How can we get that back again?

Q.   my bf and i had a perfect sex life when we first met how do you get that back ? ...

A.   20 September 2007: spice things up! change your routine, everyone gets bored if they do things repetitively. my guess is you know when you're going to be having it and how long it will last. change that! be seductive, send flirty texts, remind him how sexy you... (read in full...)

I've tried my best with my family and boyfriend but my life doesn't seem to move forward. What more can I do?

Q.   I really don't know where I've gone wrong in my life. I'm 24 years old and not one area of my life is working out the way I'd hoped. No matter how lacking my life is I maintain my bubbly personality and never let anyone see I'm down. I never s...

A.   20 September 2007: i feel sorry for you but your sister is not selfish, she is unwell, and recovering from an eating disorder requires strength and determaination which if you don't have you try to get the support from family. however, i don't think your mum is fair ... (read in full...)

I want to tell him about past secrets but I'm scared he will go off on one! Any advice please?

Q.   i posted this a while back as a follow-up to the question "Can he love me that much and still be that relentlessly cruel?". there was only one reply (thank you, basschick), but it's still bothering me, so i'm re-asking. "we've been doing well ...

A.   20 September 2007: be completely honest about anything. that way if he walks out on you, at least you know you did right by him, if you decide that you're not going to tell him and he finds out further down the line there are no chances he'll stay. he's asked you... (read in full...)

I'm paranoid about his ex and now he isn't replying to my txt asking for us to talk! Can anyone help me out?

Q.   hi. i wrote in yesterday about the contact between my bf and his ex, and how i went through his phone. i decided to ask him straight out about his feelings for her.he told me that he speaks to her on the odd occasion as he is grateful to her as she ...

A.   20 September 2007: he's probably doing it purposely to wind you up, but then you're not going to beleive anything he says to you anyway because you are insecure about things, namely his ex. i do think he should have been honest with you from day 1 but he wasn't, w... (read in full...)

My mum found my vibrator and seems to be shocked! I'm so embarrassed!

Q.   Yesterday i came home from work and my mum was really weird with me - very quiet and acting like she was mad and didnt want to speak to me but i didnt know why. So i went up to my room and saw that she had been tidying it up because she had a day ...

A.   20 September 2007: embarrassment is one of natures less favouarable emotions, but in a few years you'll be laughing this off. okay, so at the moment it feels as though you want the ground to open up and swallow you whole but i'm sure she's just having trouble i... (read in full...)

My fiance found out that I cheated on him. Will he forgive me?

Q.   I cheated on my fiance with a guy I work with and he found out. We broke up today. We have been together for almost five years and lived together for, four years. I miss him so much but at the same time part of me is relieved it's over. How long ...

A.   19 September 2007: no disrespect intended but do you deserve his forgiveness? i think that you may be over optimistic here. i think time is a great healer but you hurt him quite bad. as for your heart healing, i'm unsure because you're wrapped with guilt, that he ... (read in full...)

I think I've got a drug problem does anyone have any advice?

Q.   i dont even no if this is relevent most questions on here are about relationships, but i think i have a serious problem and need help. ever scince i was 13 iv took extacy pills on most weekends. every weekend i would up my dose to see how bigg my ...

A.   19 September 2007: congratulations for realising you have a problem, its not an easy thing to admit and certianly not an easy thing to come to terms with. you need to speak to someone eho can point you in the right direction to help you overcome this addictio... (read in full...)

Guilt after two abortions and now I want a baby, what do I do?

Q.   hey im a young girl and have been in a relationship just over a year. i got pregnant by my boyfriend in january this year because we werent financially stable and hadnt been seeing each other too long we decided to have a termination. everythin was ...

A.   19 September 2007: sometimes, its not easy but i have too gone through this and i fel guilty even though it was a year ago. due to circumstances it feels like you have committed a crime against humanity but you did what you beleived to be right at the time and you ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend keeps me a secret - I think he's ashamed of me!

Q.   My boyfriend and i have been together for 7 months, he still wants us to remain secret while he tells his parents about taking his ex out..when i told him i don't like him telling about his ex and keeping us secret, he told me that, loads of things ...

A.   19 September 2007: i defo think you need to get out. if he is stuck on his ex, let her have him, don't let them laugh at you behind your back because you are worth so much more than that. if hasn't got the integrity to show you off and appreciate you, he's not wort... (read in full...)

I'm married. I've fallen in love with someone far away, but I don't know if I should up and go to her?

Q.   I have been married for 4 years (started dating since '98). Things were good (not the greatest) with her from the beginning. Let's start from the beginning... I was previously engaged to a wonderful person, but she died of lukemia. Ever s...

A.   19 September 2007: in my opinion you have answered your own question. you can't expect this other girl to wait forever and your not in love with your wife anymore. don't string your wife along, although she'll be hurt, she will appreciate your honesty. you need to ... (read in full...)

I keep thinking that we may get back together - how can I get this feeling to go away?

Q.   My girlfriend broke up with me because she was going to University and thought we'd struggle to continue to maintain our long distance relationship (We had maintained a long distance relationship of 240 miles for the past 2 years. In that time we ...

A.   19 September 2007: i think i replied to a message of yours earlier this week, and i just want to say, it does get easier, i promise. i know how difficult coming to terms with a break up is, honestly i do, but hanging on to a maybe is not a good thing. physcolo... (read in full...)

My self esteem is so low and I really can't afford the counslor that I've booked. Any help please?

Q.   I think i'm cracking up. I've always felt like i dont fit in any where, my self esteem has taken a battering over the years. I was bullied in the past at work and school and pretty much dont know where my life is going. I broke up with another ...

A.   19 September 2007: having suffereed depression i sympathise with you. it seems life has dealt you a cruel hand. i went to a few sessions with a pyschiatrist and athough it helped, what you need to do is be strong and deal with your past. i was bullied all thro... (read in full...)

I love my girlfriend, but I have feelings for someone I consider my soulmate, too!

Q.   I have been in a relationship for a year now and I love my girlfriend to death. The only thing thats bothering me is I have began to have feelings for another girl. I feel like she is my true soulmate but I know that I can never have her. As long as ...

A.   19 September 2007: if you know you could never have her, but are in a happy relationship, i think you know what you need to do. you need to let this girl go, for good, for the sake of the relationship you are in, because beleive me, if your girlfriend is a perfect ... (read in full...)

I'm 18 and in college now - should I tell my 10th grade teacher who is in a relationship my feelings for him?

Q.   Ok. I'm in love with my teacher. Well ex-teacher. He was my sophmore history teacher. Now im a freshman in college. Well i always had a thing for him. Well at the end of that year, we exchanged e-mails. We sthll write each other every once and ...

A.   19 September 2007: this is difficult because unrequited love is hard to deal with but unfortunately it happens. he is/was your teacher and unfortunately he'll always see you as an ex student, even thuogh technically you're not. if you have a friendship with him... (read in full...)

We made out on our date, but now he just treats me as a friend! I want to know what's up with us!

Q.   theres this guy that ive liked for ages, and we finaly went on a date, during this we made out it was so amazing, but since the date he just treats me as a friend and we don't even talk about wot we did. and now we r both back at college, we hardly ...

A.   19 September 2007: i'm not sure but the best thing to do is to talk to him. tell him your geeting mixed messages and you want to know where you stand. sometimes boys get scared of their feelings, he might be confused but its only fair to keep you in the picture. ... (read in full...)

Is it possible to date your ex's brother?

Q.   Please help me! I was in a bad relationship for 3 years and even lived with my ex's family for about a year and in that time I fell for my ex's younger brother. Since my ex was hardly ever around and his brother was, we found out we had more in ...

A.   19 September 2007: nothing is impossible but sometimes things are complicated. it isn't fair on your ex to date his brother when the world is full of eligable bachelors. seriously, how would you feel if the table were turned and he wanted to date your sister o... (read in full...)

She's too tight? What should I do?

Q.   my girlfriend cant have sex. she's too tight, meaning it wont go in even when im hard. what should i do?...

A.   19 September 2007: there are a few things that can loosen a girl, but try lubricants, or if this persists, she may need to see a doctor, but only if its virtually impossible to enter her as she may need a minor operation to release the muscles in her cirvix, this is ... (read in full...)

Is this harmless flirting or am I starting an affair?

Q.   i have a really good looking boyfriend who i really love and im not the type to cheat. but lately at work ive been sending emails to this one guy who is soooo good looking he flirts and i flirt back, he's got a girlfriend and ive got my boyfriend. ...

A.   19 September 2007: everyone loves a bit of attention and as long as it is just a bit of fun, it's harmless. when the suggestions start, such as meeting up, then you hit the panic button, but having a male friend who shows you some compliments and interest, is okay,... (read in full...)

How does our friendship go back to being normal without this awkwardness, after I gave him a bj while we were drunk?

Q.   my best guy friend and i got really drunk last weekend,im fifteen and he's sixteen,so to make a long story short i gave him a blowjob,it was my first time giving one and his first time recieving one.Now its really awkward between us,how does our ...

A.   19 September 2007: it is illegal for you to be drinking at 15 and there are reasons for it!! alcohol leads you to do things which you wouldn't normally do in everyday circumstances. what if you had gone further than giving him head? its dangerous and you are too ... (read in full...)

He quit watching porn for me, but he still is cheating on me by pleasuring himself! Is there any hope left for my marriage?

Q.   I am having major problems with my husband, been married for 29 years, I found out he was watching porn behind my back, he said he would stop, I caught him again a few months later, he was ashamed and promised he would stop, since then I haven't ...

A.   19 September 2007: who are you to stop him? you are his wife but why woul tell you when you are going to make him stop. cheating is when he has sexual contact with ANOTHER WOMEN, not himself. what he does when you are not around, within reason, is up to him. ... (read in full...)

I went through his phone and saw that he still talks w/ his ex! She's seeing someone, but he didn't mention me at all!

Q.   im 26 and iv been seeing my bf now for about a year, when we first got together he had just come out of a 3 year relationship and i had come out of an 8 year marriage.we've known each other for 8 years and when i split up with my husband i started ...

A.   19 September 2007: if he still texting his ex, i think you're better off without him. My reasons? If he had nothing to hide he would have told you, if it was a 3 year relationship he may still hold a torch for her. Ask any male and they will tell you girls and bo... (read in full...)

Should I tell my wife's friend that I love her so I know whether or not to stay w/ my wife?

Q.   I love my wife but I am also in love with her friend. I would give everything i have to be with her friend and don't know whether i should tell her that i have fallen for her. Will she tell my wife, would i be better to tell her to clear my thoug...

A.   19 September 2007: how selfish are you? in my opinion you are thinking of yourself and nobody else. you're stringing your wife along and keeping her on hand incase you don't get the outcome you want. tell her friend, at least then your wife will see what kind of... (read in full...)

I danced w/ my brother-in-law before my husband at our wedding - now my guy is all upset! What should I do?

Q.   I was married 5 days ago and on our wedding night I danced with his brother before I did my husband. He is all upset and has not talked to me since. I have told him I am sorry but it doesnt seem to matter. What should I do?...

A.   19 September 2007: oh dear! i thought you knew that the first dance at a wedding, any wedding, is between the bride and groom. not the bride and brother in law. he feels hurt because you chose to dance with his brother instead of him, how would you have reacted? ... (read in full...)

I'm living in hell by staying with my husband for our kids - please help!

Q.   I need advise and opions. Have you ever been in a bad relatioship where you feel as though you're under-loved, never missed and he could care less? What do you do when you feel yourself slowly falling out of love more each and every day? ...

A.   19 September 2007: i know it's easy for people to comment without any experience but i think that you shouldn't stay with someone just for the sake of your children. do you think your children would want you to stay in an unhappy marriage for them and your husband ... (read in full...)

I'm 11 and my girlfriend is getting bored of just holding hands and kissing. Now what?

Q.   i am back again hey i got a new girlfreind and we have done evreything together from holding hands to kissing what do we do know i think shes getting bored oh i am the person hew asked for advic about the getting backtogether and breaking up please ...

A.   19 September 2007: you're so young, 11 is just the beginning. you've not even begun to experience half the things in life. why are you in such a hurry to grow up? you two should be having fun - not sex. 11, you're 11 and you're worrying about what to do next, i'... (read in full...)

Will this be solved if we both bit the bullet and moved in together?

Q.   Are we ok? BF and I have been together for 4 yrs. Live seperately. Lately we have both become almost too afraid to do or say anything to each other for fear of offending the other. I work fulltime. The fulltime shiftwork. He has only himself ...

A.   19 September 2007: yes! i think if you lived together, you'd interact more because even though your busy schedules in the day prevent you spendign time together, at night you'll be able to talk about what you done and find the common ground you appear to be missing at ... (read in full...)

Is it acceptable for someone in a relationship to be swapping numbers with people of the opposite sex and receiving such texts about how horny she was?

Q.   My boy of 6 months and who lives with me, asked me to get a phone number out of a message on his phone for him. In doing so, I found a text from a girl that he had met a few weeks ago when he was out with his friends. It said how horny she was, ...

A.   19 September 2007: he's living with you and yet giving girls his numbers, it doesn't add up. in my opinion - he's not worth it. if these girls are texting inappropriate messages, they wouldn't do so without knowing they'd be happily received. he's playing you and ... (read in full...)

Is it ok he's an online gaming addict?

Q.   is it okei if my bf is an addict on online games and dont have time for me?...

A.   19 September 2007: when you come second to a computer screen, that is never a good thing. it's easy enough to say talk to him, but if he doesn't realise he has an issue, then yuo'll be talking to a brick wall. the only person who can help him is himself but he has ... (read in full...)

My boyfriends ex is trying to cause trouble. Is he cheating with her?

Q.   I had written a post a few weeks ago about my boyfriends ex.. which was.. She emailed me and told me my boyfriend and her had been talking and that they were sleeping together.. I was furious.. Now I didnt believe her because shes been trying e...

A.   19 September 2007: she may just be winding you up, but he's no innocent party. it sounds like he has cheated because the neclace and evrything else could be out fo guilt. men are terrible at hiding guilt, instead they throw money at you to make you happy. she knows ... (read in full...)

Do I get back together with him?

Q.   Hi. Can anyone help sort my mind out? I've recently got back with my ex after 6 months apart but some communication etc in the meantime. I feel that since the split in March that I have got on with my life - that doesn't mean looking for someone ...

A.   19 September 2007: i don't think rekindling the relationship is the right way to go about things. through no fault of your own, this was not meant to be and although you have got on your life and moved on, he obviously didn't. if you broke things off, you need to ... (read in full...)

How do I deal with my depression and get over her?

Q.   I have become very depressed after this girl rejected me. i dont know whats wrong. i have been reject before, and never felt very depressed for very long. at most only a couple of days, but this has lasted at least 5 months. maybe its because i like ...

A.   19 September 2007: i suffered with depression for 6 years, my circumstances were completely difference but it still is a horrible thing to go through. you need to seek medical help, they will prescribe you with mnedication that is designed to make you feel calm and ... (read in full...)

My step father pushed me into having sex, should I tell my mother? It could give her the strength to leave him.

Q.   I have a serious question that needs your opinion. Was I raped or sexualy abused by my step father? It started when I was 15. He and my mother were dating for just a few months at the time and he sorta slept over alot. One day It snowed so much ...

A.   19 September 2007: yes, you unwillingly was forced to have sex without your consent, so you were in fact raped. you need to tell your mum before something terrible happens to her, but first and foremost you need to tell the police. what i would do is, tell the ... (read in full...)

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