My thief of a stepson wants to come stay with us for a month!!
Q. What do I do?? My step-son, he is coming to stay with us for a month as his mother is going away. I have 2 children one from my previous marriage and one with my husband and our son has special needs. My step son is out of control teenager who has ...
A. 18 July 2007: Very good answers from the previous 2 posters. I would tell your husband that you will support him in this, if he will support you in return. This means, as the others said, that you agree in advance what the ground rules will be, and he enforces ... (read in full...)
I suspect my partner may be cheating - again!
Q. my partner had an affair a year and a half ago.He acts like it was nothing..i have had serious trouble 'getting-over it'. Thing is i am convinced he is at it again...no particlar reason other than 2 main signs that were there the last time and i ...
A. 18 July 2007: Hi,
Unfortunately, if the same signs are there again, then you are probably right. Most of us are a lot more predictable than we realize, so our partners can spot changes a mile away. I don’t find it at all surprising that you found it hard to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is verbally abusive when he is drunk
Q. This might sound like quite a minor problem but it really gets me down - my bf is lovely n kind etc and ive bin with him for over a year. but when he gets drunk he completely changes and is really nasty to me. he calls me a slut/whore etc and just ...
A. 18 July 2007: Hi there,
I know someone that gave up alcohol years ago because it turned her from a loving woman into a monster. That is responsible behaviour by someone who values her marriage and friends. Your boyfriend is putting his right to drink above yo... (read in full...)
If he pulls out does that mean that you wont get pregnant?
Q. I am on the pill, but I just started using it a few months ago and I am not very good about taking it at the same time everynight (next pack I will take in the AM so I do better) And there have been some times where I have forgotten until the next ...
A. 18 July 2007: Pulling out is not sufficient. Unknown to him, he will be releasing small amounts of sperm throughout sex – this is normal. So yes, you could get pregnant. If you are on the mini-pill, then you do have to be careful about taking it at the same time ... (read in full...)
I got really wet, and now my boyfriend thinks I cheated on him. What could have caused this amount wetness?
Q. What would cause me to be wetter during sex than i have been before? My boyfriend and i had sex last night. I left for an hour and came home and we had sex again and he got real mad and said that i was not right down there because i have never ...
A. 18 July 2007: Hi,
All of us women vary in that way, we aren’t robots with a preset function for how much lubrication will be produced! Maybe it just went particularly well that time, and your body went into overdrive. The issue here is not your body, but that... (read in full...)
I want to end it with her, but I'm not sure I could forgive myself for breaking her heart!
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for nearly 5 years. She absolutely adores me and would do anything for me. I love her, she is such a wonderful person. However, over the last year I've found myself less attracted to her and wanting to see what its lik...
A. 17 July 2007: I agree with Penta. You feel guilty about hurting your girlfriend now, but if there is no future in this, you will hurt her a lot more later on. She has her life to live as well, and if you hold onto her because you can’t face up to a tough ... (read in full...)
I think he is cheating with his ex but have no proof.
Q. I have been with my partner for 8 months and things were great for the first 6 months. The past 2 months he has become distant, lying and not wanting to see me, also he goes to see his kids at weekends but lies about it telling me he is working. I ...
A. 17 July 2007: So he has lied to you, then tells you that you are paranoid, and if you don’t believe him it’s over? Why should you believe someone that lies to you? That would be pretty stupid of you wouldn’t it? Any person alive would be suspicious if their ... (read in full...)
My 16 year old son is very verbally abusive with me! How do I deal with him?
Q. i feel very embarrased about having to ask for some advice on here regarding my 16 year old son. whenever he doesnt get his own way or he is in a bad mood he is becoming very verbally abusive with me, by calling me names such as dickhead and slut ...
A. 17 July 2007: Hi there,
If there was an easy answer to this, you wouldn’t be asking as you know. As you also know, it’s mostly a matter of time until he grows out of this hormone-charged irrational behaviour. In the mean time, the only thing you can do is remai... (read in full...)
I panic before a first date and cancel - how do I stop this behavior?
Q. I am 20 year old virgin, and I never had a problem with this as I was happy with myself. Now though I am getting lonely and want a boyfriend, however I am so nervous and unexperianced I normally panic and end up not even going out with them on the ...
A. 17 July 2007: 20 isn’t so old to be a virgin. I know most people may have experience by then, but it’s not like you are 35 or something. Secondly, everyone is nervous on a first date, him included. If he asks you out, arrange to do something light-hearted like ... (read in full...)
My guy is almost perfect...except he still hasn't divorced his wife! Am I wasting my time?
Q. Me and my guy have lived together for 8 years and he is almost the perfect guy he supports me and my children, we have never spent the night apart if he is not working we are spending time together.My problem is that he has not divorced his wife am ...
A. 17 July 2007: Maybe he thinks it doesn’t matter. Maybe he just hasn’t got round to doing something that will be stressful. I doubt that he is still in love with her, as from your question it is obvious that he is very happy with you. You do need to sort this out ... (read in full...)
Her family has a history of divorce and she's slept with over a dozen people! Am I setting myself up for heartbreak?
Q. I have been dating a great girl for 6 month. We get along quite well and are getting more serious. I am having reservations however. Both her mother and father have been married 3 times a piece, and her brother and sister are both separated from ...
A. 17 July 2007: 12 partners isn’t a massive number. If she started when she was 17 or 18, that’s less than 2 a year. She was hardly trawling the bars and clubs every weekend night was she? It is much easier for girls to attract partners than it is for men. She was ... (read in full...)
How can I let me friend see he's no good for her?
Q. My best mate is with a really bad guy, he lies to her, he over reacts, he plays to the fact she is sweet and feels guilty easly to get his way. We can all see how bad he is for her but she can't or won't. I really hate seeing her this upset it's ...
A. 17 July 2007: The frustrating thing is that you can’t stop your friend from loving him. It must be driving you nuts, but if you push it too far, she might chose him rather than you. Keep letting her know that you and her other friends think she’s great, so that ... (read in full...)
It's been 5 days should I leave it longer before I take a home pregnancy test?
Q. How long should I leave it before I take a home pregnancy test. Me and my boyfriend used protection but the condom split. It's been 5 days should I leave it longer?...
A. 17 July 2007: It depends when your period is due. You can get a false negative if you take the test too early. Sperm can live for up to 5 days in the fallopian tubes waiting for an egg to appear. Then it can take quite a few more days for the egg to actually ... (read in full...)
He keeps threatening me all the time and I don't know what to do about it?
Q. I've been dating my fiance for 4 and a half years and it was a bit tough first year cos we were tryng to get to know each other from different backgrounds. He is a sound engineer, I'm an artist musically. I'm really not sure what the problem is ...
A. 17 July 2007: Hi there,
This is a blunt reply, but now is not the time for airy-fairy talking. You love him, but if violence is involved, you should get out now. Violence gets worse as time goes on, it never just goes away. He is also trying to control your lif... (read in full...)
Is he right for calling me selfish?
Q. My man admitted to me that he has second guessed our relationship because I asked that we speed up the process of us getting married so his insurance will cover my infertility treatment. He says I only think about myself Is he right for calling ...
A. 17 July 2007: Hi,
On the face of it, no he isn’t. If you both want to get married and have children, then I would expect that he would be happy to save some money by getting infertility treatment paid for by someone else. There’s the question though – does he ... (read in full...)
Should I find a better man?
Q. I have been married 15 months - I am attractive and have a very healthy sexual appetite. I am attracted to my husband but he just isnt interested.Its devastating as I am 30 and just feel sex is so important to a relationship and is making me feel v ...
A. 17 July 2007: I assume that there is more to your marriage than this? If so, don’t just give up after 15 months. You need to find out what is at the bottom of this problem before walking out. Maybe he is naturally a bit shy, and you overwhelmed him at first, and ... (read in full...)
We broke up 5 months ago. Should I try to straighten things out with her?
Q. its been 5 months since me and my girlfriend broke up. it was a pretty bad breakup and i havnt seen her or talked to her since. she now has a facebook account and i dont know if i should try to talk to her and try to straighten things out between ...
A. 17 July 2007: To be really honest with you “I need space” most often means “I want to break up”. People can say this because it’s hard to make a complete break when you have cared for someone. Maybe she wanted the option of having you back if she changed her ... (read in full...)
He said bad things about me behind my back. I like him, but is it worthwhile to clear the air?
Q. hope i can get help...ok so this guy who is a friend of a friend,told me he likes me and he didnt know but i have had a crush on him for awhile now.so we began talking on the phone and he invited me and my friends to a barbeque at his house.the ...
A. 17 July 2007: Your friend will be telling you the truth as she heard it, but how do you know that his female best friend was telling her the truth? You said yourself that she likes him. You could hardly call her unbiased could you? If you are such a bad kisser, ... (read in full...)
My wife wants to leave. How do I save our marriage?
Q. i have been with my wife for nearly 20 years, she tells me her feelings aren't the same for me anymore. she has lost alot of weight in the past six months,she seems so confused, i have told her to see a doctor but she wont, now she wants to leave ...
A. 17 July 2007: It is difficult to tell from your question what is going on with your marriage. Is the weight loss a planned thing as part of a diet and fitness regime? Maybe she is having an early ‘mid-life crisis’. If she has just stopped eating and is confused ... (read in full...)
When is the right time to have kids?
Q. i have been dating my boyfriend for 2yrs and we are madly in love, we also know we are going to get married soon. we plan on having kids. but my problem is when is the right time to have kids?? while im in college or after?...
A. 17 July 2007: There is no ‘right time’ unfortunately. If it were me, I would finish college first, and then think about the next stage in your lives together. You are very young, so there is no desperate rush to get pregnant yet. If you get pregnant before you ... (read in full...)
How long is it decent to wait until you make a move on someone that has just broken up?
Q. How long do i wait untill i make the move? this guy has just broken up with someone but how long do i wait to make my move? please help xxxx...
A. 17 July 2007: Difficult to say without more information. As you are young, I assume he is too. Therefore I am also assuming that he isn’t completely devastated by the break-up – big assumption I know. If he looks generally cheerful, then do it straight away – ... (read in full...)
we used protection, but my period is overdue. Could I be pregnant?
Q. Hey everyone.Around 3 months ago i had sex with my boyfriend for the first time.Everthing was ok and we used protection and stuff but i still haven't got my period yet and am having loads of pregnancy symptoms.Its soo strange though because i've ...
A. 17 July 2007: This is worrying for you. I wonder if your periods haven’t settled down completely yet as you are still quite young. That might explain the big gap since your last one. Also, worrying about it can sometimes cause them to stop. You should see your ... (read in full...)
Could sharing lotions be a danger to your health?
Q. Could you get diseases by sharing creams, or lotions if the person has contact with blood on their face or hands?...
A. 17 July 2007: I’m not speaking as an expert, so I wouldn’t know whether ‘bugs’ could survive in lotions or not. I think that if someone touches the top of a bottle after touching blood or an infected area, then it could be passed on to someone else via the ... (read in full...)
How do I improve my sexual tecnique when I didnt know I was bad in the first place?
Q. Hello, My girlfriend of 5 and half years has just recently broken up with me (about 2 weeks ago). She said that she no longer loves me, she found a new guy, she doesn't see a future with me, and etc. Anyways, I met her the other day and we w...
A. 16 July 2007: YOu aren't bad at sex. It takes 2 people to make a good sexual relationship. If she had a problem, she should have spoken to you about it. How were you to know that you weren't satisfying her if she didn't tell you? Don't let this overshadow your ... (read in full...)
I'm 10, he's 19. He found out I've got a crush on him and now he's avoiding me!
Q. i like a guy 9 years older and i thought he liked me ( me 10, and him 19). it was good when no one knew i liked him, but then some one found out. she told him and now he wont talk to me. what do i do???...
A. 16 July 2007: Hi there,
He has absolutely no choice but to avoid you, because if he has any involvement with you at all he could get in very serious trouble. It's a pity that you can't carry on enjoying your crush on him, but now that some interfering person h... (read in full...)
My husband won't talk about having children with me
Q. I've been married for two years, we dated for three. My husband has two kids from a previous relationship. I have no children of my own, and his kids live with us full time. My husband was alone for seven years with his kids before he married me. ...
A. 16 July 2007: Hi there,
This is hard for you, because you did the right thing by discussing children before you married, and now he has changed his mind. I think my advice depends on how old you are. Your age range says that you are 30-35. If you are closer t... (read in full...)
Does he love me or not?
Q. i'm in love with ag guy a year older than me. i love him with all my heart, but the problem now is i don't know how he feels about me. we once had communication breakdown and i sugested we part ways thinking that maybe he will realise that i'm ...
A. 13 July 2007: Hi there nyasha,
No reason to think he doesn't care for you. You asked for the split, not him remember. And when you said you wanted him back, he came back. He hasn't done anything wrong so far has he? I'm afraid the only way to know for sure is ... (read in full...)
My 'friends with benifits' is going to get married, but I want him now!
Q. I am confused about my feelings for my best friend. I'll call him David. I met David 4 years ago. We met through mutual friends and our social circles and interests just crossed paths. We are both involved in an organized sports...
A. 13 July 2007: I agree with flower girl. I doubt his word about feeling obliged to get married. You hear his side of his relationship with his GF remember, not hers. I'm not saying he is a bad person. I think he is being economical with which facts that he tells ... (read in full...)
I love my guy but when we are away from each other over summer break I feel its ok to have sex with other guys.
Q. ok so been with my man for almost 3yrs and we have gone our seperate ways on holiday for the summer i am completely in love with him and would never wanna lose him but wen ppl go away im a believer in the theory that different rules apply!i met a ...
A. 13 July 2007: It's only OK if he thinks it's OK. ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to have asked for the expensive ring back?
Q. I just bought a $3K ring for my girlfriend and then she announces she is moving out after 10 months. I asked for the ring back and that offended her? Am I wrong to have asked?...
A. 13 July 2007: The point is, you shouldn’t have had to ask. You didn’t actually say in so many words that it was an engagement ring, but I don’t think it makes that much difference even if it wasn’t. I think the general convention is that the woman should offer to ... (read in full...)
Are penises supposed to point up when erect?
Q. When I was younger and dated younger men their penises would always point straight up when erect. The last two guys I dated (one was 44, the other, 40) had penises that when erect, pointed down and even to the side! Is this an age/health thing or ...
A. 13 July 2007: It's an age thing. Men vary of course, but generally, older means less vertical. Doesn't mean they don't work perfectly fine though!... (read in full...)
He is mad about a one night stand that happened 7 years ago!
Q. 10 Years ago I went out with this lad for 3 years, we had a very volatile relationship, we were always finishing, but was strange as we did really love each other and the sex was always great, 1 of the times we split up for 3 months a during that ...
A. 13 July 2007: If it happened like you say it did, then he isn’t being rational about this. The way I read your email, you had finished with each other at the time, and he also saw someone else. I think he has had a gut reaction to this which he may know quite ... (read in full...)
I want to swing, but my wife doesnt
Q. My wife and I are still young, We are both 34 and we have been together for 17 years, highschool sweet hearts and I love her very much. But lately, I have been expressing to her how much I would like to be with another couple. She is a very ...
A. 13 July 2007: Swinging can be risky even if both partners are willing, because eventually one side or the other might get jealous. But that would be your choice - if you were both willing it might work. If one of you is unwilling it is a complete no-no. ... (read in full...)
I'm on my period and a guy dry humped me, he didnt have any clothes on but I had a thong, and pyjama pants... Is there any way I could be pregnant?
Q. Okay, I'm on my period and a guy dry humped me, he didnt have any clothes on but I had a thong, and pyjama pants... Is there any way I could be pregnant?...
A. 13 July 2007: Unlikely. You can get pregnant for around 3 days a month mid-way through your cycle. It's risky to rely on this routinely though, because your cycle might vary unexpectedly. But as you were actually having your period, I think you are OK. The ... (read in full...)
Isn't this fraud?????
Q. I found out off a work colleague of my husband's that he and his friends at work have been raising money for a non-existent employee who has lung cancer in order to fund a trip to Las Vegas to see showgirls and prostitutes. The "colleague" was ...
A. 12 July 2007: Are you 100% certain that this is the truth? If and when you are certain, you need to tell. But regardless of that, get some legal advice now about where you stand. I have no idea what the laws are in your country, but as you are married to someone ... (read in full...)
I am a bit perturbed by the fact that she chose to share a flat with one her mates and another guy (male). Am I being petty?
Q. Dear cupid, I have been seeing this girl for 2 years now, due to various reasons we cant quite cohabit now, and she needs to move into the city where I live coz she has to finish off her last credits at UNI (where she lived on Uni campus for the p...
A. 12 July 2007: Hi,
When I was a student, quite a few people were in mixed-sex flats. I don’t remember anyone getting off with someone they were sharing with. Like AskEve says, they are more likely to be irritating than attractive. Some people became friends,... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says if I want to be with him I can't hang out with my friend anymore and I just really don't know what to do because I want to do both of them!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and I love him with all my heart. I would like to spend the rest of my life with him. But I also have a very good friend that I like to talk to and hang out with and just have fun with him. My boyfriend ...
A. 12 July 2007: Hi,
I agree with what the others have said - unless - If you are honest with yourself, have you bit a bit overly-friendly with your friend? Are you maybe flirty, or cuddly with him? Friendships with the opposite sex should be accepted by our love... (read in full...)
How much weight can I lose in 4-5 weeks?
Q. how much weight do you think i could lose in around 4-5 weeks? i am 5 foot 3 and am 45 pounds overweight. i do not look very fat, i'm just a big girl. could i be able to lose around 25 pounds if i try very hard such as vigorously exercising a...
A. 12 July 2007: Hi,
That's 5 -6 pounds per week. If you lose it that fast, your body won't be able to get all the calories that it needs from fat. It will burn lean muscle tissue as well. Not only is that unhealthy, you are losing the stuff that keeps you look... (read in full...)
I just found out my ex gf has been secretly going to see her ex when she was telling me she was visitng family and friends!
Q. Found out my ex gf had been secretly going to her ex bf house when she was telling me she was visiting her mum, sick nan, friends etc.When I confronted her she got mad and denied cheating. Personally I think she was sleeping with him – if it was all ...
A. 11 July 2007: Someone who makes a practice of telling this many ludicrous lies really will get her comeuppance, because big-time liars get caught out. OK some people will choose to believe a certain amount if they want to. If you feel it is badly affecting your ... (read in full...)
I had a sexual relationship w/ him before he started dating my relative. He comes onto me and when I tell him to stop, she laughs! What do I do?
Q. A close relative of mine has a boyfriend that I had a sex relationship with before they got involved. He still comes on to me in front of her. Why does he do this? How do I know if it is bothering her and does this mean he is still interested in ...
A. 11 July 2007: He may be trying to make her jealous. Maybe he thinks he’s a gift to womankind. He sounds a bit a of a sorry idiot to me. Avoid him when you can. If you have to see him because of family, then tell him to leave you alone. Don’t leave it till he does ... (read in full...)
I think marriage is too much if we want different things! What should I do?
Q. im engaged to be married in 2 yrs just before i go to uni. but recently my fiance and i have been discussing our future and we want different things. i want to complete my degree and then travel for awhile. he doesnt ever want to leave our ...
A. 11 July 2007: Hi,
The other 2 are right, no rush. You don’t have to end it right away just because you want some freedom while you are young. Just be honest with him about what you want. Maybe after you have been to uni and travelled, you will be happy to sett... (read in full...)
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