My wife is cheating with former threesome partner
Q. i recently discovered that my wife has been seeing a man that in the past we had two threesomes with.. these threesomes ended or so i thought,when i had to have pelvis surgery due to a car accident..... unfortunetly the surgery affected my ability ...
A. 27 February 2023: I am sorry about what you are going through, this can't be easy.
Unfortunately this is the result of involving a third party within a marriage, looking back at previous DC posts threesomes never end well. You are potentially risking bringing... (read in full...)
An affair thats remembered
Q. why cant i forget an affair my husband had 20 years ago we are happy now but its alwas in the back of my mind...
A. 20 February 2023: To put it simply the trust barrier was broken and once this happens the damage is often irreparable.
Trust is the most important contributing factor that bind a relationship together, without trust a relationship normally takes a downward... (read in full...)
Came face to face with a dreadful, abusive ex and it was awful. How should I behave if I see him again?
Q. I was in a terribly emotionally abusive relationship for about 3 years, many years ago. He was my high school boyfriend and everything seemed fine at first but then started spiralling out of control really fast. He would call me the worst of names, ...
A. 9 February 2023: I think as you live in such a small town, the chances of bumping into him on instances such as this are extremely high. I know its not easy seeing him as he caused you so much turmoil when you were at school.
Apart from move away to a more dis... (read in full...)
How does an open relationship work for others?
Q. My wife and I have been married for 22 years and sex is still great, but pretty much the same way much of the time. Lately, we have been talking about maybe trying an open relationship and seeing others. We have a very strong marriage and I think ...
A. 9 February 2023: Well i have never tried it so i can't offer you advice on how it's working for me.
The only advice i can offer is hearing about other peoples experiences and previous posts relating to this topic here on DC. From what i can gather is once you star... (read in full...)
Should I rethink things?
Q. He expected a thank you for getting a coca cola for my mother and asked me on the phone if my mother got the coke so I said yeah why? and he told me where was his thank you and I told him that when he asks for a thank you after he wants to do ...
A. 8 February 2023: I know what you mean when you say you do things out of your own votality. I think in situations where you do an anonymous favour to help someone out your not expecting please and thank you's.
But I think if someone did a favour for me as describe... (read in full...)
I don't feel comfortable about my mom's partner and she won't back me up
Q. Hi, sorry this question is rather long. I'm an adult and hopefully moving out soon, but I have been struggling with my mother and her partner. They have been together for 9 years after my parents' divorce. I suffered abuse from my estranged father...
A. 8 February 2023: I really sorry for what happened to you in your childhhood, this can't have been an easy thing to go through.
You start by saying he is sometimes nice to you, and is good to your mother, and offered you the use of his flat etc.
Ok I agree I ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend abused me should I leave him?
Q. I have a boyfriend and we have been dating for the past 2 years. We had plans to get married and settle down. But we were recently in a 9 month long distance and I was flirtatiously texting some guys which i thought was harmless. There was one guy ...
A. 8 February 2023: No i don't think you should persue this relationship, i think the relationship has met its end.
It met its end when you started texting other guys, which you and i both know is wrong.
You have broken the trust barrier, often once this happen... (read in full...)
What happens at bachelor's parties?
Q. What happens at bachelor's parties? My wife has been asked to be the stripper for a friend of someone she knows. It's suppose to take place in March and she says it sounds exciting, but I need to hear what others think about it, before I give her ...
A. 8 February 2023: Like i said in your previous post i could not imagine many guy's being ok with this.
She is stripping, i assume to the point of being naked, with a load a drunk guy's oggling, and even touching.
Is this going to be a one off?. I suspect ... (read in full...)
My friend won’t accept no for an answer over a particular situation.
Q. ? ? So this is a really odd scenario. When I was 13 my parents built a granny annex next to our house - it was for my grandmother to live in after my grandad died- when she also passed away my sister and I had sleepovers in it and we have l...
A. 8 February 2023: She seems to be putting a lot of time and energy into one annex, almost like she is obsessing over it.
If its not her trying to move into it, its everyone she knows, then she makes you feel guilty about her step sister.
I don't know why s... (read in full...)
Will it be ok to let my wife be the stripper for a bachelor party?
Q. Before the pandemic, my wife, now 34, was a dancer at a club out of town. Recently, one of the other girls that danced there, contacted my wife and asked her if she would consider being a stripper for her brother's friend's bachelor. My wife told ...
A. 8 February 2023: I personally would not be happy with my wife/girlfriend dancing and stripping for a bunch of guy's looking, oggling, or even touching her.
I guess you must be ok with it to a certain extent because she did this before the pandemic.
Will th... (read in full...)
Why is my ex reaching out after so long?
Q. I dated this guy about three years ago. We had a great relationship when we were together, however, he kept going back and fourth between me and his ex whom he has a young son with and I was caught in the middle. It was a toxic cycle that I finally ...
A. 8 February 2023: I don't think there is any reason what so ever for you to still be in contact with him.
He messed you you around, you were caught up in his tangled web of mess with his ex and their child and as a consequence caused you a lot of stress.
Ther... (read in full...)
I cant shake the feeling that he cheated and wants to be with the other woman
Q. I need some help please. I KNOW my fiancé was having an affair. He never confirmed it in fact he completely denies it, but I KNOW. We’ve been together 6 years and have a 1 year old son. A year ago his behaviour changed. The usual signs. He was ma...
A. 21 January 2023: It kind of sounds like there was something going on with this snap chat person, then for whatever reason things ended, maybe she finished things with him and he crawled back to you, who knows.
The problem now is the trust barrier has been bro... (read in full...)
Complicated flirting situation, really need advice!!!
Q. I really need some advice here because I have no one to talk to about this. I have a very strong crush and I think he feels the same way but I just can't be sure. He flirts with me a lot, or at least it seems that way to me. The last time I...
A. 21 January 2023: You don't say in what sort of situations these things are happening.
If he is your medical doctor and all this is happening at the practice then i will say leave it and keep things professional, and that also being the professional he is he shoul... (read in full...)
I want a married woman
Q. I am interested in having an affair with a married woman. I really enjoy the forbidden aspect of it all, as well as the low maintenance. Can anyone suggest a good way to meet married women?...
A. 18 January 2023: I am not going to suggest how to meet a married woman because I think unfaithfulness is wrong on all levels.
Why do you want a married woman anyway and not an easy life with someone who is single?.
You might enjoy all the sneaking around ... (read in full...)
How to seduce a woman much older than you.
Q. I am friends with a woman much older than me. I think she is probably 70. I am early 50's. I am interested in having a NSA sexual relationship with her, but I don't know how to turn the relationship sexual, as we are just friends and walking part...
A. 18 January 2023: I would just be yourself and don't force things, and let things happen easy and naturally.
Keep on doing what your doing, being friends, keep enjoying your walks, and let things materialise over the natural course of time.
You are in yo... (read in full...)
How can I have peace
Q. Hello I have been with my fiancee for about 6 years. The first 2 years were great! He was loving, attentive, and very charming. Then he turned into a nightmare. He lacks communication skills and gets angry very quickly. I've pretty muc...
A. 18 January 2023: Sounds to me like this relationship has run its course and going by what yo have said I think its time to call it a day.
Relationships are supposed to be 50/50, not one person doing all the leg work to keep it going.
Is there something keepin... (read in full...)
How can I have peace
Q. Hello I have been with my fiancee for about 6 years. The first 2 years were great! He was loving, attentive, and very charming. Then he turned into a nightmare. He lacks communication skills and gets angry very quickly. I've pretty muc...
A. 18 January 2023: Test... (read in full...)
He is in jail and I don't need the stress
Q. Hi I met a guy in 2020 and ten months after he was arrested and kept in prison. At first he was saying he would get out and that he had done nothing wrong. Then in November just gone he was sentenced to 17 years for a serious gang related cri...
A. 15 January 2023: I don't think that you should feel bad, this would be no life for you. I am assuming this when you met him in 2010 he kept that side of his life secret to you?.
OP none of this is your fault, but the best thing you could do now is wish him well... (read in full...)
How do I politely ask my friend to move out of my home?
Q. ? ?A friend of mine that I’ve know for over 20 years recently separated from her husband- she was struggling to find somewhere to live so she asked if she could move in with me and my family for a month until she found somewhere. S...
A. 13 January 2023: A classic example of being the perfect housemate in the beginning then becoming messy and lazy onece she has got her feet firmly under the table.
She has got used to paying no rent, and doing absolutely nothing around the house and being waited o... (read in full...)
Did she pick this trick up?
Q. Have been married 27 years and my wife let me cum in her mouth for the first time. I have always told her I was coming in past and she would immediately stop This time she kept going like she had done it before. Swallowed it all D...
A. 13 January 2023: Maybe its just something that she was always afraid of doing, but at the end of the day its any ones guess.
Maybe after all these years she just thought what the heck and just go for it.
Not sure if she just picked up the skill on the sid... (read in full...)
His parents know we had sex
Q. me and my "bf" had sex for the first time about a week ago (been together for a little over 3 months but we haven't made it official yet) and I guess I left a hickey on his neck .Anyways fast forward to about 2 days later and his parents saw and ...
A. 13 January 2023: I find it hard to believe that the parents of someone in the age bracket of 13-15 told them they had sex with someone that they diden't care.
Your both at a very tender age, and what you did could potentially have future implications on the rest... (read in full...)
Online dating problem
Q. I joined a dating site to talk to women as I’m single, a girl messaged me who liked my profile, got in touch. we had many things in common and talk every day. since then, I’ve been having doubts, as many people lie on dating sites about their age. ...
A. 13 January 2023: This is the thing with online dating, you never really know who you are talking to, online people can be anyone they want to be.
I suggest given her age of 18 i would disregard that chat and maybe set your age ranges to maybe 25-35.... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about her past
Q. I'm currently in a relationship, I have been seeing her 8 months and been official for 2. Great chemistry, loads in common and just generally going amazing, i wish I met her sooner in my life, both the same age. How ever I can't stop over thinking ...
A. 13 January 2023: I think its important for the progression of any relationship is to look forward and not back.
We have to accept that unless someone has been living under a rock for the past decade we are going to have some sort of history no matter who we are. ... (read in full...)
How to fix a brokenheart
Q. Help iam I love with a lovely man who loves me but I have hurt him very badly and he has fi ished our relationship. He is. Builder and recently put I. A new Back door for me. I always pay him for his work as I would not take advantage of him This ...
A. 13 January 2023: All sounds a bit awkward and messy to me, maybe you should have got some other trades person to complete the work for you.
Ok whats done is done, i think maybe you should just pay him what you owe him and leave it at that. And next time use some... (read in full...)
Hurt over lost friend
Q. My best friend of many years is in an abusive relationship and has suddenly decided to cut me out of her life. When they first started dating, I wasn't wild about it. She has so much going for her and this guy just... doesn't. I tried to be supp...
A. 11 January 2023: I realise how upsetting this must be for you, but you were her friend in a time of need and turmoil. You were there for her when her partner got drunk and was abusive to her.
Unfortunately as good a friend as we are to people we can't control ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his mother ruined Christmas
Q. I’ll try and keep this simple. I’ve being with my boyfriend for 9 months. He had recently just come out of a relationship and he was back home, living with his mother. He had recently lost his father just four month before we met. We moved in ...
A. 4 January 2023: It seems that every thing with him was all done in a whirlwind, you never really had time to get to know him properly before setting up home together.
Yes this relationship is very toxic indeed, and just because you live together does not mean... (read in full...)
Confused as to whether I want to get back with partner or not
Q. I was with my partner for 7 years until a few months ago which was due to a fight which lead to me moving out and getting my own place. The sequence of events went quickly but I have been enjoying having my own space again. We've been meeting each ...
A. 4 January 2023: By your own admission you say that you are enjoying having your own space again, so just on this alone I would say that you are not ready to jump back into a relationship with him.
Having your own place has helped your recovery, and will continue... (read in full...)
What do I say?
Q. Need some advice it's driving me mad to be honest I was seeing a guy since Aug 2022 so wasn't long Spent every weekend with him spoke everyday etc planned to spend new years eve together Exchanged Xmas presents where he bought me a lovely ne...
A. 4 January 2023: I think that you are just going to accept the fact that you dating this man and unfortunately it never worked out.
Breaking up with someone is never easy, not for anyone but all I can say is that things will get easier over time. When some tim... (read in full...)
Dating websites and scammers
Q. I'm on dating sites and it's not good. We start chatting, start connecting and they request money. Why do they feel it's okay to ask a stanger whom they've never met for money? It's a complete turn off. Even on social media they reach out a...
A. 4 January 2023: I am not a fan of dating sites to be honest, for the very reasons that you describes, along with all the other things like catfishing, ghosting, and just generally messing people around.
You could change the dating sites you use to some more rel... (read in full...)
Bed and breakfasts and sex
Q. My bf of 6 months and I are taking a weekend trip. he said he is taking me on a romantic weekend trip. We are staying at a bed and breakfast for a few nights. Have you found bed and breakfasts to be romantic? The rooms to seem to be classic and ...
A. 4 January 2023: It think it all depends where you are staying really and the type of building it is.
In the UK there are hotel bed and breakfast chains like premier inns, and travel loges that have a lot of rooms. Or if you head to the coast there are more old... (read in full...)
Need ideas to sexually embarrass my sister in law without being creepy.
Q. My sister just got me a mankini with bells and a rednose on the kini part. So in trying to get her back, I want some ideas to embarrass her but not come off creepy. backstory, the family has been together forever and never has been any sexually ...
A. 28 December 2022: Yes i also agree that the best option would be not to play.
How are you going to embarrass her without coming across as creepy?. Well i don't think you can. As you say the one who will benefit will be her husband.
Aside from creepy and provo... (read in full...)
How to move on from a falling out with a best friend?
Q. One of my closest guy friends online and myself have had a big falling out. It has gotten very toxic and very messy. He has blocked me on all social media accounts (however hasn't unfriended me), and he is deleting his main social media account ...
A. 23 December 2022: I think in this instance you are going to have put this down to experience, a learning curve and move on.
For what ever reason your friendship never worked out, and that's just life i'm affraid.
How do you bear through the pain of breaking... (read in full...)
Perfect husband sober, but dicing with death when drunk.
Q. Hi All, My husband and I have been together since we were at school, now we are in our early thirties so I quite frankly don't know where to turn from here. I have always known that drink hasn't agreed with him. Some chemical in his brain ju...
A. 23 December 2022: I think that you have to draw the line somewhere, he can't keep acting like he is in his late teens, it is not fair on you or your kids to keep on putting up with this behaviour.
I am not suprised that you don't want this anymore, and you shou... (read in full...)
My friend used me to look after her kids!
Q. I feel that I’ve been used recently by a friend and it’s really upset me. A few days ago I had arranged for my friend to come over to my house for a coffee (we usually meet up at 1 of our house 2 times a month). That morning she arrived ...
A. 23 December 2022: You openly told her that you had an open appointment at 4pm and that she needed to get back for 3.
She may well have been stuck in traffic, but if you want my honest answer I think her planned meet up went on longer than expected.
She lef... (read in full...)
Am I putting in work and not going to get the commitment?
Q. I just turned 29 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for 28 months now we have been living together for a year and 8 months, we have a dog together we both have good jobs and are responsible people. The topic of marriage and children has ...
A. 19 December 2022: I think you need to stop worrying about time running out as I think that you have plenty of time.
You have already both made a commitment together by way of setting up home, getting a dog which is a step in the right direction. If he was time was... (read in full...)
Do I tell him that I know he cheated?
Q. I have just found out that my partner of 9 years had cheated on me with his work colleague at his Christmas party. I feel physically sick at the thought of it and having seen the messages of their night of passion, arranging to meet again and keep ...
A. 18 December 2022: So he was unfaithful to you with a work colleague, shared a night of passion, and by the looks of it arranging to meet again.
I don't think this is something that can be just swept under the carpet and move on like all is fine. He has been unf... (read in full...)
Seeing that ex is engaged has thrown me off
Q. I broke up with a guy about 2.5 years ago. It was an unhealthy relationship where I saw red flags and knew we were incompatible, but thought my love could “fix” him and maybe if I changed certain things about myself, it could work. I have no idea ...
A. 18 December 2022: You know that you did the right thing, and what you did was 100% for the best.
We both no that googling him was not a good idea, at the end of the day an ex is an ex. I not a great fan of social media for that very reason, and that is seeing p... (read in full...)
Am I wasting my time?
Q. I’m very confused about this guy’s behaviour and need advice. I started talking to a guy, he used to text once in a few days but very detailed msgs about some mutual topics , never opened up about himself much emotionally. I didn’t mind cause we ...
A. 18 December 2022: To be honest after 6 months i think you should be further than just exchanging texts once or twice a week, and no calls. I would treat your relationship with him with some trepidation, and air on the side of caution because i think he might very ... (read in full...)
Anyone from South Africa that can answer a question?
Q. Hi is anyone here from South Africa? Just have a question. I met someone online I have went to see him 3 times and he wants to visit me. He said he got his passport, his NIN, and needs his covid vaccine and says it is 300.00 usd. Seems a li...
A. 15 December 2022: Here at DC we see posts similar to this one time and time again where someone is another country is asking for money. Some of these people are writing in having already parted with vast amounts of money only to realise that they have been scammed. ... (read in full...)
Do I stay in this marriage?
Q. Dear cupid. I'm writing here already knowing the answer to my own question, but I just need to talk to someone about this, and I can't talk about it to anyone I know. I'm married, and miserable. It hasn't been easy, and the main problem for me i...
A. 6 December 2022: I feel that if you give it 6 months, nothing will change, so you give it another 6 months, then another, until your life becomes one long giving it 6 months with nothing ever changing.
You have to accept that this marriage is done, its got to t... (read in full...)
Think I really hurt my friendship, what should I do?
Q. I’ve been friends with a male friend for a LONG time. I met him working at a GameStop and we became fast friends. However it turned out he really had feeling for me, I turned him down, (I’m gay) but he was really fun to hang out with and I wanted to ...
A. 6 December 2022: I think the problem is he developed feelings for you early on and probably felt like something could materialise as you both got on so well.
For no fault of your own his dreams of having you came crashing down when he found out you were off limi... (read in full...)
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