Like what
she writes?
... Add *ovial to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *ovial a private message | | | *ovial's profile:hi everyone
I am a woman in my early thirties.
I think what qualifies me is that I love helping people probably because I want to see everyone happy, I cant stand seeing people in pain I always try to find solutions to make them feel comfortable with their situations. I also like being around people socially especially kids are such a joy to spend time with.
All the responses I give are to be used as guidelines not AS-IS while making future decisions. Most of this responses I truly give based on an opinion and lessons learnt from past and present experiences. you are always welcome to pm me if you require my opinion i promise to respond objectively.
Jovial
|
|
| Latest articles: Is it wise to excuse staying in an unhappy relationship by labeling it ‘Complicated’?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 April 2008: So often we fall in love with someone who is not in love with us and chase after them that we fail to notice those who are chasing after us. Relationships are complicated so are we. Have u ever been asked how is it so far with your boyfriend? Are ...
Is all completely fair in love and war?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 April 2008: Hello there! Why did someone came up with the words its all fair in love and war? I told my friend my ex-colleague and friend was coming over for supper last Saturday night she said oh really I am so looking forward to meeting him is he married? I...
I don’t know which one is worse space or let’s be friends?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
17 April 2008: Hello there! It starts with: “Baby we need to talk” - “I think I need a space” or “I think we should break-up”, “Don’t worry we can still be friends”……… OUCH! Dumpee “Honey why? I thought we were tight” Baby please!!! I don’t understand cant ...
Take courage and go back to the ring
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
10 May 2007: I was in the bus this morning when the two ladies were gossiping about a co-worker who is sleeping with her friend’s husband (who happens to be her boss) behind her back. The other one said “oh that woman is very crazy she thinks living it like that ...
When do you know its time to let go?
No replies yet... 10 May 2007: Few weeks ago a friend of mine found out her fiancée has a child by a girl from his neighborhood and all this were unknown to her, you can imagine the pain she felt, she was and still is heartbroken and perplexed by what the man she loved and ...
|
When your bf or gf stops doing 'the little things' does that mean that they don't care anymore?
Q. I've seen a lot of posts on here about people saying after xx years (usually 1-3), their bf/fiance/husband just doesn't seem to do the 'little things' anymore (like call alot, text, want to cuddle not just for sex, bring flowers, pay compliments, ...
A. 1 February 2007: I don’t think anyone here can give you the right answers because relationships are different as people aren’t the same. If you and your partner celebrate for example valentine and anyone of you always go overboard then after few gestures your ... (read in full...)
When your bf or gf stops doing 'the little things' does that mean that they don't care anymore?
Q. I've seen a lot of posts on here about people saying after xx years (usually 1-3), their bf/fiance/husband just doesn't seem to do the 'little things' anymore (like call alot, text, want to cuddle not just for sex, bring flowers, pay compliments, ...
A. 1 February 2007: I don’t think anyone here can give you the right answers because relationships are different as people aren’t the same. If you and your partner celebrate for example valentine and anyone of you always go overboard then after few gestures your ... (read in full...)
She dumped me because I made remarks about her wieght. But I think she still loves me and is with this new guy on the rebound. What do you think?
Q. Me and my fiance had a great relationship. Till i said remarks about her weight, "I know horrible right". I joined the Marine Corps and run and work out all the time. I also said this while I was drinking and my drinking was becoming a problem. We ...
A. 1 February 2007: hi dear
First of all stop obsessing about her she is not your oxygen that’s why you are still breathing well without her. Frankly speaking i don’t think if she was your oxygen you would have insulted her the way you did. And please don’t lay this... (read in full...)
She has a boyfriend but has feelings for me as well. They are having problems and I feel like I'm intruding. What should I do?
Q. i'm in love with this girl and she has a boyfriend. i expressed my feelings and turns out she is currently facing some problems with her bf. she currently has feelings for both me and her bf. she is on a "break" with her bf but i feel like i'm ...
A. 1 February 2007: i think you need to tell her to forget about you for a while until she has solved her issues with the current bf, she might be having feelings for both of you because she is not happy with him right for whatever reasons and going thru tough time and ... (read in full...)
My bf wants us to live together but isn't ready for marrige. I am also attracted to this other guy who likes me back. Who should I choose?
Q. I am almost 26 and have been dating a man for 4 years. I bought a house and want to marry him. I know he is not ready yet. He is applying to Pharmacy school and wants me to move with him. I don't want to give up my good job or my house for ...
A. 1 February 2007: i think it will be irresponsible of you to give up everything you have worked hard for including your job for your bf who is going to school, how are you going to survive? the things you said seems to me you are not even sure if this rship will ever ... (read in full...)
We've split and I've turned to drinking and occupying my time to cope, but nothing works! How can I stop drinking and how do I move on?
Q. Hi, I have been through a very nasty break up with my partner of more than 2 years. I am not going to go into the full story of that as I really don’t want to take much of your time, beside it is a very very sad story anyway. Basically I lov...
A. 31 January 2007: hi
i am really sorry about what you are and went through but i will tell you one thing "life goes on" let her go she wasnt good for u anyway. she is happy with her life and not bothered because you are her past and thats where you will stay for good... (read in full...)
My husband doesn't understand the effect that lack of sex is having on our marriage...
Q. I have been married for 28 years, no children, my husband didn't make love to me and this went on for 5 months with him insisting there is nothing wrong and nobody else, he did still cuddle and be affectionate though. He did go to the doc's for a ...
A. 31 January 2007: hi
i dont know if i can be married for 28yrs without a proper sexual intimacy. i really applaud your patience. you have really missed a lot in your marriage, i know someone might say it can work but only if u married for companionship and in your... (read in full...)
I blew it with my fiancee.
Q. Me and my fiance had a great relationship. Then i said some things I shouldn't have. We havn't spoken in a month. She has a new man. She wont take my phone calls,but she wont tell me whats goin on cause she still loves me. What do I do? ...
A. 31 January 2007: hi
first of all how do you know if she still loves you? ever heard the saying there is a thin line between love and hate? maybe thats what is happening here, whatevr you pushed her over the edge; although i do think her having a new man was very... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is trying to change who I am and control what I do!
Q. Hi to everyone out there reading this. My question has to do with being in love with my bf but not willing to change who I am.To make myself a little more clearly I will tell you a little more about my problem. I been living for almost 11 months ...
A. 31 January 2007: hello
you are making a lot of sense. i dont think changing yourself to suit your bf standards is the way to go. u said he said he wants to protect you from yourself my question is what is it that you do after getting drunk? do you embarass your... (read in full...)
I was a virgin when he married me but when he gets angry he calls me a 'SLUT!' Why?!
Q. I have a lovely husband of 13 years. I was a virgin when I married him. When he gets angry he often calls me a slut. Can you tell me why he does this? Is he just using the worst word to annoy me as this term is the complete opposite of what I am? Or ...
A. 31 January 2007: eve is right he is the only one with answers, if you are playing and he calls you that we will assume it turns him on but when he is angry is an insult, i think it doesnt matter whether you are a complete opposite of slut or not the word is just not ... (read in full...)
Keep ending up with men who put their ex-wives first!
Q. Hi, Twelve years ago I was in Love with whom I thought was the love of my life. He was not ready for a commitment, and I dedcided to move on with my broken Heart. I had other relationship's, but I had come to accept that I would not ever fall in ...
A. 30 January 2007: yes you should be scared you are faced with a lot to deal with topped with a lot of uncertainties. its good your children are older and can understand what you are going thru. the truth is one way or another you will have to deal with this and i ... (read in full...)
He has nasty divorce issues and we argue a lot more. Should we give each other space to clear our heads?
Q. My partner and I have been seeing each other for 12 months. His divorce has become very nasty and his ex wife is making his life hell. He is stressed out and not coping and therefore neither am I. We argue more often than we have been and now he ...
A. 30 January 2007: i agree with the first writer, you need to cut him some slack maybe he is the cause of this arguments but dont you think you might be pushing too hard? i was gonna say to his exwife but she is also giving him hell as you say, so the poor guy is ... (read in full...)
She flirts in chat and on texts and takes stuff from me...is it time to call it a day??
Q. Lately (my now ex fiance)was calling me by a different name several times daily. I since found she`s yet again been flirting in chatrooms and also now by text.When asked about it, she automatically turned on me, and as usual got angry and started ...
A. 30 January 2007: the last paragraph was suppose to read as follows:
i dont know why you are still together judging by her behavior but the fact that you refer her as a your exfiance shows that you managed work things out in the past so whatever you do this time try ... (read in full...)
She flirts in chat and on texts and takes stuff from me...is it time to call it a day??
Q. Lately (my now ex fiance)was calling me by a different name several times daily. I since found she`s yet again been flirting in chatrooms and also now by text.When asked about it, she automatically turned on me, and as usual got angry and started ...
A. 30 January 2007: dear anon
i think this woman has no respect for you. however you must stop invading her privacy. i think before you make any decision sit her down and talk about this issue openly if she keeps on accusing of anything remind her that she is the one ... (read in full...)
Friendship loyalties and trouble among friends!
Q. Me and this guy...We fancied each other for ages, about three months, but never went out. Suddenly he went out with one of my best friends. It's causing secrecy and lies in our friendship group, her and another friend feel they have to go off in ...
A. 30 January 2007: Hi there
At your age liking a guy should be fun not complicated. You liked him and he went for another girl tough he lost a good girl so move on. This is the age where relationship is unheard of, its time for fun don’t allow bf baggage to come betw... (read in full...)
Having some trouble with Tami! What should I do?
Q. Hello everybody i would like to ask what to do about a girl I know Tami, a friend of mine who is just back from NY, I introduced her to my friends sometime ago so she got in our gang, she brought another girl Chris sometime and she was a attracted ...
A. 30 January 2007: dear astrid
have you tried talking to your friend? If you haven’t I think its time for the talk. You cant keep allowing your friend to do as she likes while you know deep down you are hurting. U don’t have to put up with a friend who has no resp... (read in full...)
Keep ending up with men who put their ex-wives first!
Q. Hi, Twelve years ago I was in Love with whom I thought was the love of my life. He was not ready for a commitment, and I dedcided to move on with my broken Heart. I had other relationship's, but I had come to accept that I would not ever fall in ...
A. 30 January 2007: Hello
Sometimes in our lives we face a lot of difficulties including difficult choices, but if we look at this rationally there is nothing difficult about it we just want to have it all and it is impossible we cant have it all. I think you need to s... (read in full...)
Broken up with an abusive man but got some worries about getting together with my ex's one-time-friend...
Q. I am going through a divorce right now. I have three children from my previous marriage. The father was a very abusive guy in every way. The past four years I had my eyes looking elseware but did nothing with it until a month after I filed my ...
A. 30 January 2007: Hello there
Where do you think we are going with this?
I think what u need to do right now is to take things as slow as you can. Don’t stress too much about where this is going because you don’t seem to be emotionally ready for this as well, yo... (read in full...)
He asked if I was happy about our split and I said yes. But I really want him back!! What can I do?
Q. Oh guys I want my ex back so much. I posted about this the other day - I am 27, he is 30, we had a long distance relationship for two and a half years and he then called a break, saying he felt something was missing and wasnt sure if he could see ...
A. 26 January 2007: hello
i am sorry dear. i think you need to open up about how you feel or you hold your peace forver. there are only two scenarios here; its either he called bcos he was missing you hoping things will fall together again but he was afraid of reje... (read in full...)
Can't stop beating myself up over my past cheating...
Q. 3 months ago, I cheated on my girlfriend of then, 4 months with a friend from high school. I told her and she decided to stay with me, but I know that I don't deserve it. I never expected her to forgive me. We had a fight the night before it ...
A. 26 January 2007: hi there
you need to forgive yourself and move past it. what is done is done and she gave another chance focus on making her happy when u see her happy you will know you have earned her trust and it will ease your mind. it might take a while for ... (read in full...)
After 2 years we broke up but I still love him! What can I do?
Q. ME and my boyfriend have been Goin out for 2years and 8months and we broke up but he still tills me that he luv's me and still calls me but he just dont know wat he wants and i dont want to lose him, i love him so much wat do i do ...
A. 26 January 2007: hi there
letting him go should be your first step, the guy is messing with your head he doesnt know what he wants which means although he loves you are not what he is looking for. it hurts and confusing for you and definitely not easy to forget but ... (read in full...)
Broke up with my girlfriend because of money issues. She said she loved me but it seemed like money was the most important thing to her.I'm devastated!
Q. I hope you can help me with this, Can someone's love be so much that it depends on money? My ex-partner, destroyed everything that we built together over the past 2 years just over money issues!!! She suddenly changed her attitude towards me as soon ...
A. 25 January 2007: hi there
i am sorry u feel the way you with good reasons of course; but believe me the rejection you feel its normal love is not cheap because its not for sale and can never be bought. your ex was after money and that was her motive from the star... (read in full...)
We want to live together..we're both in different cities though. Any advice?
Q. My boyfriend and I were discussing about living together. We currently live in two different cities about 1 1/2hrs drive apart. We spend a long time thinking whether I should move up or he should move down. If he moves down, I would be able to be ...
A. 25 January 2007: hi there
i dont think any of the aunts can really tell you what to do because this is a decision that lies between you and your partner. however maybe we can try and put some insight on your ideas. first of all let me say moving to a new place whet... (read in full...)
He said he wasnt ready for a relationship, am I wasting my time hoping he will change his mind ?
Q. my bf dumped me because he says he just isnt ready for a relationship and doesnt want to hurt me. Am i wasting my time hopeing he will chage his mind? And is it possiable to still be good friends, im scared ill always want more?...
A. 25 January 2007: hi there
i dont know if hoping is good in your situation because from what u said there are not really words that describe your ex giving you any ideas on your future together although we really dont know what the future holds i think moving on with... (read in full...)
My GF gets upset thinking im bored of her as my job is making me so tired... What can I do as I really need this job but dont want to lose her!!! ?
Q. Sorry about the long question, but I've got to get some help with this. My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year and a half now, and while we've had our ups and downs, recently we've been having an increase in arguments and fights, ...
A. 25 January 2007: i also want to add that i am appaled that when things are not right u dont blame each other but although both of u are trying to take responsibility of what went wrong blaming yourselves its not a way to go because in every unsatisfactory situation ... (read in full...)
My GF gets upset thinking im bored of her as my job is making me so tired... What can I do as I really need this job but dont want to lose her!!! ?
Q. Sorry about the long question, but I've got to get some help with this. My girlfriend and I have been dating for almost a year and a half now, and while we've had our ups and downs, recently we've been having an increase in arguments and fights, ...
A. 25 January 2007: hi there
i am sorry about what is happening as specially because it is a very awkward situation indeed. this is something you cant resolve on your own no matter how big your love is for her. first of all she needs to understand that waking up at 3... (read in full...)
Ive got a crush on my cousin(s) I dont know who to talk to or what to do ?
Q. my cousin is 16,i am 18, n i got a crush on her,.what do i do? i have some outher cousins i have crushs on too.the outhers are,17yr old.and 19yrs old. i just dont know who to talk to about this...
A. 25 January 2007: i dont know if you are serious or just playing about. anyway i dont know how are you related to those cousins in my culture you can only date very long distance cousins as long as he or she is not from your mother's side as it is considered taboo ... (read in full...)
Im jealous that my ex has someone new, I really want someone new but its not happening!!!
Q. im jealous my ex boyfriend has moved on and im still single even though it was me that broke up with him. i really would like to meet guys but since starting college and doing a child care course i havent met anyone i really thought it would be a ...
A. 25 January 2007: hi there
i think you need to relax and not jump into any relationship that comes along because your ex is ahead of you. you had your own reasons to break up with him i dont think you had competition in mind who will find a partner first. set your... (read in full...)
Not sure if I need this as a piece off my chest or I need advice!?
Q. I don't know if I need advice or just to speak my peice. My wife and I have been married for 5+ years. Durring which we have ebbed and flowed to the point that I would beleive at times she has another relationship. This is the only night of the week ...
A. 24 January 2007: i am sorry i misunderstood your post probably am not the only one i thought it was a comment for people to appreciate what they have.
i think its time you and your wife do some talking you cant have sleepless night crying while she snores next to a... (read in full...)
How can 2 people with such goodness together have such a geographical problem and get through it to be together?
Q. I am a divorcee of 3 years now and just turned 50 this year. I met and have been seeing and much in love with a new significant for 8 months now. I live in NW Arkansas and he lives in S. Missouri. We are 96 miles apart but are weekend warriors to ...
A. 23 January 2007: follow your heart but dont ignore your head, if u know this is the man you have been waiting for i believe your instinct are right. people say a lot of things and they dont usually remember half of it. i think they might be scared because they were ... (read in full...)
What did I do wrong? Why has he done this? I feel like my heart has been ripped out!
Q. i've been going out with this guy for less than a month, but we spent so much time together. Just last night we went to a friends together and he was hugging me and everything. today i messaged him asking how his day was and he didn't reply. that ...
A. 22 January 2007: give it time he will cool down and tell u why he had to do what he has done. maybe you are too good for him have you been acting strangely innocent? maybe he lied to you (trying to win your heart) about some things and he knows if u find that out ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has changed for the worse. Please help me I'm so confused!
Q. dear cupid, i had this hard time with my boyfriend for 7 months and as time goes by, he changes. like he used to call me and send me text messages almost everyday, but now he just sends me messages twice a day and gets angry when i send h...
A. 22 January 2007: dear krongie
i am really confused too by his behaviour. lets say he is pushing you away but he is too much a coward to even say it? what then dont u think all his nastiness should have cleared your confusion by now? i think the writting is in blac... (read in full...)
My husband wants us to live with his parents but I don't really want to. I need your help..
Q. i have been married for over a year now and my husband and i are renting a place as we cannot afford to buy a house just yet. the problem is my husband wants us to buy a house together with his parents, but of course them living in the main house, ...
A. 22 January 2007: dear anon
i think you need to explain it to your husband just the way you explained it above, you love them and u dont want to spoil it by living in the same space which is true and i totally agree with you. do you really have to stay with them new ... (read in full...)
Lack of female interest has caused lonliness for me and I'm drinking a lot! Any advice?
Q. I'm 24 and I've virtually always been single. The few times I have managed to ask a girl out it has lasted at most a few weeks (clearly they have come to their senses). I also tend to get the "I just wanna be friends" reaction from girls a lot, ...
A. 22 January 2007: dear anon
i am sorry u feel the way you do, however you are to be blame for your dilemma. you need to start believing in yourself before someone invest in you. learn to make friends with all male and female species that are classified as human with... (read in full...)
I feel resentment. But should I let it go and walk away?
Q. The floor fell out from under my feet when after two years of what I thought was a good relationship my boyfriend told me that he was seeing my close girlfriend ( I believe he put it as a “midlife” crisis). It suddenly made sense why she had been ...
A. 22 January 2007: hello roxie
just let bob go you are too good a woman for him anyway. i think bob and cindy deserve each other they are selfish and full of deception u dont need people like that in your life.
about closure? well u need to give yourself that in ... (read in full...)
I have cheated on my wife numerous times, because she doesn't take care of my needs. What should I do?
Q. I have been married for 5+ years and have a 3 year old and one on the way. My problem is my wife is not as excited about sex as I am and I have cheated on her numerous times. I have not had sex with another person since the summer but I have had ...
A. 22 January 2007: First of all i think u need to start respecting your wife and stop making excuses for your infidelity. the reason why your wife is not interested it might be because she had felt that u are not interested as your heart is somewhere else. so she feel ... (read in full...)
How can 2 people with such goodness together have such a geographical problem and get through it to be together?
Q. I am a divorcee of 3 years now and just turned 50 this year. I met and have been seeing and much in love with a new significant for 8 months now. I live in NW Arkansas and he lives in S. Missouri. We are 96 miles apart but are weekend warriors to ...
A. 22 January 2007: hi there
fortunately it doesnt take rocket science. your relationship is still new thats why there is still a lot of "I"s only time will tell when u guys will be fighting over who goes where, during such time you will think country life is a blis... (read in full...)
How can I prevent myself from obsessing over him?
Q. Hi Guys Im in such a dilemma. I broke up with my ex, because he is getting married to the woman he made pregnant. When we dated he told me she was an ex, but later found out she was pregnant by his baby. The problem now is that I cant seem to get...
A. 22 January 2007: I think u need to just let him go, the guy knows which button to push to get what he wants. and unfortunately u are letting him win. i also think you are searching for closure and the truth is you will never get that from him he is not ready to give ... (read in full...)
How do I get revenge on him?
Q. How do i get revenge: Was seeing my ex for 2 years, fell pregnant 5 months ago, he did want it didnt want it etc this went on til i was 5 mnths gone. He then was dead against having it and cos i was so in love i went with his decision. Had abortion ...
A. 22 January 2007: Hi there
I think u need to calm down and accept your misfortune with your dignity intact, remember even though he is the one who persuaded you to have an abortion you had a choice in all this. I understand you feel betrayed whatever you will do to h... (read in full...)
Just engaged and now he's planning a for an extended holiday with buddies. Im' hurt! Any advice?
Q. I just got engaged last month, and I always knew that my fiance was planning on going to Florida with his friends in the month of March, but now it is extended to Feb. also because he's buying a golf cart to drive around. I'm coming to visit him on ...
A. 22 January 2007: hi
i think u are a bit overreacting, however its normal to feel like he is negleting you. just remember u are just engaged not married yet if u were married and he is planning a trip with buddies then u have every reson to worry. i think it is only... (read in full...)
He says he doesn't want a serious relationship... So what did his mention of a child mean?
Q. I met someone almost a yr ago. It took him along time to kiss me. He came out of a relationship. HE is divorced no kids. This is my problem he doesn't want a serious relationship (which to me serious we hang out about 3 to 4 times a week which ...
A. 19 January 2007: hi there
maybe it was just a silly joke, as thoughtless as it is, why dont you ask him what he was implying by that? then maybe it will put your mind at rest. and another thing i dont think it is good for you to believe the relationship is seri... (read in full...)
Walked in on my girl bonking a guy I know... what should I do now?
Q. Hullos ,it is quite sad that i got my girlfreind cheating on me with another guy whom i happen to know .i found them having sex together so what i did i told the guy to simply dress up an leave the place .There after i was my girl who immediately ...
A. 19 January 2007: Hi there
I am really amazed by your calmness in all this, you seem like a very respectable individual with a lot to offer, but unfortunately things got out of hand. I think u have two options here its either you forgive her or you let her go. Choo... (read in full...)
| *ovial's friends
These are mutual friends, so *ovial has
added them and they have added *ovial!
|
