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123Next > [3 pages, 79 answers]

Pregnant ex has completly shut me out!

Q.   Can you al please help me. Long story shory, I met the girl of my dreams in Nov 09. We got on so well together. That well that before we knew it, we had each others names tatooed on each other as she wanted a symbol of us. We had separate houses. ...

A.   30 March 2010: It sounds like maybe you jumped in too quickly? How much do you know about her past? Her friends? Her family? From what you have written there is no other conclusion than its over (and that may be best for you). If I were you, I would hire a lawyer ... (read in full...)

I am worried my brother in law's son might try something with me

Q.   I m 37 having 2 kids. Both studing in 12th and 10th standard. I m house wife and my husband is a worker in oil factory. My husband met an accident and is in hospital from last 3 months. My brother-in-law and nephew has been paying all the hospital ...

A.   28 March 2010: Can you leave or go anywhere to avoid him during the day and lock your door at night? Or could you invite your mother or another relative to come stay with you until he leaves for protection? If someone else is there with you, I'm sure it would ... (read in full...)

My mom is ignorant and annoying...

Q.   Ok, to make a long story short. My mom considers herself "open", but she's also biased and prejudiced and whatever doesnt seem right in her eyes, she opposes. I have a boyfriend, which my parents don't know goes beyond anything than a friendshi...

A.   28 March 2010: One option, that I realize a lot of people might disagree with, but it is pragmatic: don't tell them anything. Do what you want, and don't share with them the parts of your life that they judge and disapprove of irrationally. Do your best not ... (read in full...)

Would doing this fantasy for real be going too far?

Q.   So I have a fantasy that I've already told my BF about, but scared to act on it cause it may change our relationship. So my fantasy is to watch him have sex with another woman. I know this usually doesnt turn women on thinking of their men being ...

A.   27 March 2010: If you're brave enough, and you trust your boyfriend enough, then live out your fantasy. Just think deeply about the possible consequences to be as sure as you can be that you won't end up hurt. But, I got an impression after reading your pos... (read in full...)

Fiancee lied about being a virgin, how can I let her down gently so she can find someone of the same mindset?

Q.   Hai, il go straight to the point. My fiancee lied to me that she was a virgin, am 27 years and i kept my virginity she told me she slept with 10 guys and i dont i can marry her. How do i let her go gently so that she can find some else with her same ...

A.   27 March 2010: The only thing you can do is be honest. I think if you have saved yourself for marriage, its fine that you want someone else who holds sex as sacred as you do. Just explain that you still think she is a nice person, but that your dream girl must be ... (read in full...)

Why should I have to choose between my girlfriend and my mum?

Q.   Please help. My girlfriend and i have a young baby, my girlfriend thinks my mum hasn't made enough effort in coming to see us and the baby (which maybe she hasn't but my gf hasn't made her feel welcome lately). Also my mum is depressed at the ...

A.   23 March 2010: Let them know this is the opposite of making amends! They might not realize how much ground they have lost by getting their feathers all ruffled again, over a minor meeting in the street. I really do think that having your mom make some kind of ... (read in full...)

Long-distance boyfriend ignoring me?

Q.   My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship. We used to talk almost all day, everyday, but naturally that has stopped being the norm now. My problem is this: I write to him, but it takes him a week to answer me. He says he's busy with ...

A.   20 March 2010: What do you mean when you say that he has a right to do whatever he wants? Are you in an open relationship? A week is an unreasonable amount of time to take to respond. The truly un-confident thing to do is not express what you are really f... (read in full...)

I love my mistress but I feel bad for leaving my wife and kids

Q.   I am 35 years old, married for 9 years with 3 kids relatively young - 7 and twins of 4 years old. I met a girl 4 years ago (Kelly) but we really started to see each other more often like twice a week over the past 4 months, before it was once a mo...

A.   17 March 2010: Personally I think you will be miserable if you leave your wife for Kelly, but maybe that is exactly what you deserve. So, go on, do it. What is stopping you? Your wife deserves the chance to find someone better than you. I don't really think you ... (read in full...)

Girls is it confidence, appearance, attitude; what?

Q.   Girls: does confidence matter more if the guy is generally seen as "unattractive"? I have good days where i'm super cocky, other days where i'm almost shy. As confident as I get and as much time as i spend on my appearance and personality, I get ...

A.   17 March 2010: Maybe that vibe you get, like you "went too far" is just a result of you doubting yourself. Don't doubt yourself! As long as you aren't being an a-hole, your confidence is attractive, so long as its genuine. The way to make it genuine is to believe ... (read in full...)

Is it worth apologizing and clarifying things, or is he clearly not interested and should I just move on?

Q.   I hooked up with a friend recently and I want to keep doing something no-strings-attached, but he's sending mixed signals. He's always seemed interested, but for most of the time we knew each other I had feelings for other men and basically ignored ...

A.   17 March 2010: One rejection could have several different meanings, like you mentioned, he could actually be busy/a little confused. I don't think two weeks is too long to wait for a second attempt, I actually think giving it some time is a good idea. You have to ... (read in full...)

I don't have feelings for this guy but he's totally obsessed with me! Help!

Q.   Ok so there's this guy i met about a year ago over myspace and my friend cesar knew him too, the guy who i met online lived out of town but he was like completely obsessed with me so him and my friend made plans for him to come down to try to hook ...

A.   16 March 2010: Unfriend him on every social site you are on, don't call/text/email him, don't respond when he calls/texts/emails you. Don't even read what he sends. Refuse to talk about him with other people. Thats how you finish this.... (read in full...)

How can I help them both if they keep shutting me out?

Q.   My 18 year old daughter has been dating her boyfriend Ryan for 3 years. He is a family friend and we have known him since he was just a child. Last year he got mixed in with the wrong crowd and got involved with drugs. He started skipping school and ...

A.   16 March 2010: Maybe if you drop gentle hints letting her know that you know what is going on. Talk about the situation in a round-about way, if she won't talk openly about it Hint that sometimes you have to give up on people so that they can learn to fight for ... (read in full...)

Is it worth apologizing and clarifying things, or is he clearly not interested and should I just move on?

Q.   I hooked up with a friend recently and I want to keep doing something no-strings-attached, but he's sending mixed signals. He's always seemed interested, but for most of the time we knew each other I had feelings for other men and basically ignored ...

A.   16 March 2010: I think an apology and an attempt at a discussion couldn't hurt anything. You can at least try and figure out where he is at, and maybe things will match up for the two of you somehow. Good luck!... (read in full...)

I'm sick and tired of being bullied and being a little person in the dark who gets pushed around by life.

Q.   I really, really need help. I'm so scared that there is something profoundly and irreversibly wrong with me. I'm very fearful for my future because of some experiences that I've had in the past few days. I'm afraid that I'm destined to be a...

A.   16 March 2010: First of all, since you mentioned it twice, I'm just going to reinforce this: don't kill yourself. It's selfish and wasteful, and things could really get better... so no giving up! I don't know if this will help at all, but I recently watched ... (read in full...)

Why should I have to choose between my girlfriend and my mum?

Q.   Please help. My girlfriend and i have a young baby, my girlfriend thinks my mum hasn't made enough effort in coming to see us and the baby (which maybe she hasn't but my gf hasn't made her feel welcome lately). Also my mum is depressed at the ...

A.   11 March 2010: I don't think that your girlfriend was completely wrong, based on the way you said your mom reacted to being banned from seeing the baby, it sounds like she was playing games with your gf, and maybe she is not really happy that you are grown up and ... (read in full...)

Was my cousin trying to have sex with me?

Q.   Was my cousin trying to have sex with me? About 4 months ago me and her and the family went to France and stayed in a hostel one night our parents left and there was a friend sleeping on the sofa and my cousin was taking a shower and came out nake...

A.   9 March 2010: The situation you described does not sound like she was trying to have sex with you. Stop fantasizing about your cousin or it'll be strange when you see her at family gatherings. Lots of girls want a guy's opinion about their body, (everyone likes ... (read in full...)

I think I had unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be

Q.   I'm currently in a relationship with a girl (I'm 17 and shes 16, I'm a junior she's a sophomore)l that I do really like but lately things just haven't been working out. I think I may have found the exact reason why... This is actually my firs...

A.   9 March 2010: Hardly anyone feels good after a break up. You said the fact that she checked up on you after you dumped her shows how awesome she is, and I agree she must be an unselfish and very caring person, but its also kind of indicative of how much you ... (read in full...)

I feel hurt she's dating again even though I've met someone else

Q.   I need someone to tell me to grow up. I don't think I deserve any sympathy or kind words. Here's my situation: Last year I split up with my girlfriend. We'd been together for 5 years and were always so much in love. She wanted children though ...

A.   7 March 2010: My first boyfriend is getting married this summer and it bothers me to think about it, and I cried and was very upset when I first found out (although I am already married to someone else). I think its normal, and you shouldn't beat yourself up for ... (read in full...)

My ex girlfriend is pregnant. She wants me to get rid of my current girlfriend. Am I selfish to say no?

Q.   I have just found out my ex girlfirend is 5 months pregnant, she has just found out also she had no idea. Ive always stayed in contact with her and tried to help her. now i want to be there for the child, but i dont know if im ready for a child ...

A.   7 March 2010: You're NOT selfish, your ex is just hyper-emotional and probably scared. Explain as nicely (and firmly) as you can that your new girlfriend stays, and you won't ever get back together with your her. Do your best to reassure her that you want to be ... (read in full...)

Help!!! I don't know what to do about him any more... any ideas?

Q.   We met about 2 years ago i was 17 and he was 25, we dated 4 over a year, we loved each other a lot, we broke up about 6 months ago he said he wasnt happy with me but we was still hanging out and having sex, he wanted 2 be friends even though i didnt ...

A.   7 March 2010: You can leave each other alone, you just have to decide not to put up with him anymore. Do you want someone who says he's a prize to win? How can you cope with hearing him talk about other women? What do you think will happen in the future for the ... (read in full...)

I think I had unrealistic expectations of what a relationship should be

Q.   I'm currently in a relationship with a girl (I'm 17 and shes 16, I'm a junior she's a sophomore)l that I do really like but lately things just haven't been working out. I think I may have found the exact reason why... This is actually my firs...

A.   7 March 2010: Sorry if this is overly blunt, but you sound like you are thinking and obsessing about her and your relationship way too much. Maybe you need to calm down, and quit looking at the relationship as a problem that needs a solution. Relationships aren't ... (read in full...)

Girlfriend nervous with anything sexual.

Q.   I am 14 and my girl is 13 and she is scared to even look at me when i take my shirt off and we have only kissed but she is nerves about sex what do i do? ...

A.   6 March 2010: If you want to do more sexually, date someone about two to three years older than you, and you might have a better chance of achieving that. Your girlfriend is TOO young. You say that you have "only" kissed, but that is a big deal for most 13 year ... (read in full...)

Help!!! I don't know what to do about him any more... any ideas?

Q.   We met about 2 years ago i was 17 and he was 25, we dated 4 over a year, we loved each other a lot, we broke up about 6 months ago he said he wasnt happy with me but we was still hanging out and having sex, he wanted 2 be friends even though i didnt ...

A.   5 March 2010: First of all, stop wanting him back. Its useless. He has already totally lost respect for you, and you are letting him treat you like crap (confirming to him that his loss of respect was a valid judgment). He will never again truly want to be with ... (read in full...)

Am I wrong to show concern?

Q.   I'm in a relationship with a beautiful woman who I'm planning to marry, and everything is going well for the most part, except something happened recently that really made me feel uncomfortable. We both live in China, but I came back to the US to ...

A.   1 March 2010: You're not wrong to show concern, but maybe you didn't do it in the best way. Being direct and open about your concerns with someone who may feel a bit guilty, or someone who has something to hide, almost never works. They get instantly defensive, ... (read in full...)

I've stopped talking to my ex girlfriend after she cheated on me

Q.   I cut off my 4-year GF, cold turkey, after I caught her cheating. She called (and e-mailed) a few times on the first day. It's been 4 days (no contact)... ...when should I expect the pscyho-ex-girlfriend problems to start? What should I expect?...

A.   1 March 2010: There really isn't a set pattern of behavior for this type of situation. Maybe she wasn't that invested in the relationship anymore anyway (considering she was cheating), and she will just quietly disappear from your life. Hope for the best, hope ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend has other girls listed as 'my baby'. He said it means nothing.

Q.   What do you do if you asked your new boyfriend about him having girls number under my baby that isnt you and his reply was that it doesnt mean anything to him?...

A.   28 February 2010: Tell him you think that is a ridiculous answer and you want to hear something that sounds like the truth, or you want him to change it. ... (read in full...)

I want to move out of the friend zone and into being boyfriend material

Q.   Hey every one, ive got two quite big problems that have been bothering me for a while.. i go to a college in london right.. im 18, and (not being big headed) im a good looking guy.. well lots of girls like me.. im REALLY friendly.. sometimes TOO...

A.   27 February 2010: Think more about exactly what you want from a girl. This will make you more discriminating when you are talking to them, and you will reject some, and treat others with a bit more enthusiasm. It sounds like now, you spread your adoration around to ... (read in full...)

My friend is pregnant again, and I don't want to have to help financially again

Q.   I'm probably going to get alot of backlash with what i'm about to write so I want you to read this post properly. I have been mates with this girl for about 10 years. In that time she has has 2 children that were accidents 1 of which I'm god...

A.   27 February 2010: You should be able to be a friend to her without accepting responsibility for her children or her financial woes. Friendships are supposed to be about listening/talking, providing emotional support, not about enabling someone to continue making ... (read in full...)

Is it bad that I 'make things easy'?

Q.   I asked this question a bit ago, but I don't think I was clear enough in what I was saying, so I'm going to try again. I don't see this as a compliment, but probably half the people in my life have told me something along the lines of: "I like you ...

A.   25 February 2010: I have dealt with the same thing. I actually even had a guy break up with me over it, too. I don't like causing unnecessary problems, or pushing to get my way. A lot of things that seem worthy of arguments to other people just aren't (or weren't) ... (read in full...)

Should I go out on a date with my friend in spite of being married?

Q.   i am married but i want to be with my friend and he wants to be with me but i don't think it will lead to sex should i go out on a date with him or not? I mean i am not saying I don't want have sex with him I do but we are both a bit more mature ...

A.   25 February 2010: Its sounds like a risky, inappropriate situation that may lead to infidelity. Are you happy in your marriage? Maybe you should try to answer that question thoroughly before you wreck something that may only be slightly broken. Dating, and seriously ... (read in full...)

If your partner says they love you, yet you don't feel the same way yet, do you tell the truth?

Q.   I'm just wondering. What if you're in a relationship and your partner tells you that they love you but you don't feel the same way at least not yet. Do you be honest with them about how you feel or do you lie and say I love you back so they won't ...

A.   25 February 2010: Tell the truth with kindness I think. I had a friend who was in this situation, and her boyfriend had to wait two months before she was really ready to tell him that she loved him, but they were together for four years, four great years, in the end. ... (read in full...)

Is it my fault that he abuses me? How can I leave him now that I'm pregnant?

Q.   Hi There, I really need some advice - even though deep down im sure I think I know what to do.......but while I am writing this - I dont I really dont know what to do. I am in a relationship - we have been together for 10 years and he is my first. ...

A.   25 February 2010: Find a safe place to go, a woman's shelter, a friends house (anywhere), get out IMMEDIATELY and stay out. Let the birth of your baby be a turning point in your life, let it motivate and inspire you to be a stronger, healthier person. This is an ... (read in full...)

My online guy says he loves me all the time, how can I know he's being sincere?

Q.   I'm in a long distance relationship with a guy I met online. I have met him in person and it's completely amazing how much we get a long. He said he loved me even before we met (talking for a few months, phone webcam) and I kind of took it with ...

A.   24 February 2010: You can't know it for sure if he is sincere until you two spend real time together. The airport example you mentioned is not much to go on. Maybe that is normal airport behavior for him, maybe he thought he wouldn't be able to go beyond security ... (read in full...)

Should I expect my ex of a year and half to stop talking to me?

Q.   Hi everyone So my ex an i broke up around Oct. of 09 so about 5 months ago and we had a really bad break up the thing it was like wishy washy he sort of said i cant give you what you need and then i said we should break up he just said okay and af...

A.   24 February 2010: It sounds like he uses vague responses to keep girls on the hook, most likely so that he can keep his options open for the future. Its a kind of relationship insurance, he pays a small amount of positive attention to you every once in a while, ... (read in full...)

I'm 16, my 46 yo relative has admitted he is in love with me

Q.   im inlove with my second cousin his 46 and lives in scotland and im 16 i want my feeling to stop but recently he told me he feels the same i live in the uk he doesnt know how i feel i just want to get over him but his texts are just solidifying my ...

A.   21 February 2010: Tell your parents about what he said and how you feel if you really want help ending it. ... (read in full...)

Should I continue my affair for a chance at some happiness

Q.   Hi my name is michelle i have been married for 20yrs, unhappily for 10yrs to a much older man. ( 30yrs my senior.) I have been having an affair to a single man for the last 4yrs and love him very much. My problem is, that he doesn't like me ...

A.   21 February 2010: Maybe you are both using each other, to an extent. You have to decide, would you rather have an ideal relationship, or two relationships that both force you to compromise things that you want. Out of fairness, you should probably let your husband ... (read in full...)

Since he cheated my life has never been the same

Q.   I'm at breaking point and so is my partner. I don't know what to do anymore. He cheated at the begining of our relationship and I have obviously not dealt with it. My anger has grown to such a point that I don't know if it will ever get better....

A.   20 February 2010: First of all, you have every right to be angry at her. She is a slut, whore, bitch, every single name you can think of, they all describe her. There is something wrong, in my opinion, with the way people no longer condemn seductresses. When someone ... (read in full...)

By accepting my wifes affair am I just prolonging the inevitable?

Q.   Hi , i have been married for 12 years but this year i found out that my wife was having an affair . We are trying to work things out but she still wants to keep seeing the other man . I am not happy about this and at the moment it has been left that ...

A.   20 February 2010: This is a question you should ask her, you need to know if she is planning to leave eventually. Obviously, she hasn't left yet, nor does she want a divorce, so maybe she will just get it out of her system eventually. Who knows. No one else can tell ... (read in full...)

How should I express myself?

Q.   I'm a heterosexual straight guy who loves women and everything associated with them but lately there has been a guy who has me interested. we are best friends and we talk all the time( aim ) etc  we go to the same school and we trust each other. im ...

A.   14 February 2010: What do you mean by "he plays with other friends"? If he is already experimenting sexually with other guys, than you shouldn't be too afraid to let him know how you feel. Chances are he won't run screaming. If you are curious and you like him, no... (read in full...)

He said I'm loose but I've NEVER had sex with anyone else! How can this be?

Q.   okay so last night me and my boyfriend we just laying there cuddling and talking and he told me i was loose..... and he was serious... he said its the most noticeable when hes on top which is one of my favourite positions.... hes the only guy ive ...

A.   14 February 2010: He's trying to gain power by making you feel uncomfortable. Don't let him rattle you, it was a really mean thing to say, and I'm sure he knows that. Let him know he can't talk to you that way, and that he hurt you. If you have a vindictive strea... (read in full...)

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