Like what
she writes?
... Add *vyblue to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *vyblue a private message | | | *vyblue's profile:What qualifies me to help people…? Well to be honest I don't really know. I consider myself to be a life long learner therefore far from knowing everything. I believe the "outsider looking in" kind of advice can sometimes be the best because it can be the most eye opening and honest response that you will find.
Where do I live…? I sometimes wish I lived in the land of LaLa but for the time being I live in the Land Down Under.
My family makes me tick. They are my motivation for most things that I do choose to do.
|
|
LDR boyfriend has been chatting inappropriately with other women and even worse, with his ex... And has painted me like a monster in front of her!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and long distance for almost 1 year. Up until a few days ago, I thought our relationship was amazing. I considered this relationship the healthiest, most honest, and loving one I've ever been in. H...
A. 10 September 2016: Leave... (read in full...)
How can and should I handle this situation? My Bf has announced that his baby mother will be visiting us with the children this weekend.
Q. Hi everyone, I feel that my boyfriend is too close to his baby mother. He is always making her come to his house with the kids. He insists they are just friends. His baby mother is a lesbian and she tried to come on to me the other night whil...
A. 10 September 2016: They may be friends which is good for the kids but this sounds like a bit of a set up to me. Like he is testing the waters for a bit of sexual action between you all. If your age is correct, run. Just add water parenting relationships can be all ... (read in full...)
He's so ready to give up on our affair. What should I do? He's married, and he's unjustly accused me of being unfaithful
Q. Hello everyone I need advice on something I've Been messing around with this married man for about 2 years. I haven't spoken to this man in 3 weeks over the labor day weekend I believe he seen me talking to another man an now he is acussing me o...
A. 10 September 2016: You ask this question with a sense of entitlement to what is clearly not yours, that being this poor woman's husband. He treats you well because it is a small price to pay for a bit of fluff on the side and a stroke for his ego. What does it tell ... (read in full...)
Can people tell when they're "the mutton dressed as the lamb"?
Q. Just in case people are not familiar with the term “mutton dressed as lamb" - it refers to older people who try to appear younger (and usually fail dismally). And it's most often applied to women who wear clothes that are aimed at a much younger ...
A. 10 September 2016: No I don't think people will tell you in fear of offending. Im advice would be to stay away from shops when you can see the clientele is in there 20's. Take note of what younger people are wearing and think about how one of your same age friends may ... (read in full...)
He got a strip dance and lied to me about it. Should I stay or move on?
Q. 29 F dating 1.5 years. We talked about how I did not like strip dances. I told him I was fine with him going with friends, but not get a dance. He ended going with just his best friend and went to a private room and got a dance. He lied to me ab...
A. 9 September 2016: Deal breaker. Not so much for the lap dance,not cool, but for the lying. Sounds like he knew darn well yet still did it anyway. Even if he didn't, what decent man thinks its ok to do such a thing behind his woman's' back?Even better, who would want ... (read in full...)
Want to treat him to something special. But what? I'm a struggling student and he wouldn't want extravagance
Q. Hey, right I met my bf online and we have been together 2 and a half years. We have a nine year age gap but it does not bother me as he is simply amazing. We live 2 hours and a bit away from each other however I have moved back to uni so we're ...
A. 8 September 2016: How about a homemade birthday cake and card? Nearly everyone I know buys the darn things which is just sooooo commercialised and well...boring! ... (read in full...)
Was I in the wrong at all here? Should I complain? Should I leave a bad review?
Q. Hi all! Some advice needed please. I've been going to this beauty salon for almost 3 years and they have a very strict policy whereby if you give less than 24 hours notice to cancel your appointment, you are fully charged. I have no problem...
A. 5 September 2016: perhaps you should email them a bill for your wasted time due to their lack of decency to return a call. Most defiantly this is bad review territory. Keep your screenshots, calls sent etc just as proof in case they are dumb enough to bring up ... (read in full...)
I can't work out his sexuality
Q. Hello. I am curious or rather confused about my friend's sexuality. I don't know whether he is gay or bisexual. When he is around me, he acts very masculine and straight. I catch him staring at women when we hang out. I am 25, he is 32 and married ...
A. 2 September 2016: Hi there
I think asking someone to disclose their sexuality is as intrusive as asking someone how much money they earn so no i wouldn't be doing that but seriously Why does it matter, how does you knowing fit into the friendship? do you fancy him ... (read in full...)
Ex and I are getting back but how can I get him to forget that I was talking to other guys while we were broken up?
Q. My ex and I are getting back together after being 2 months apart. I am so happy and have always been in love with him, and he feels the same way. Unfortunately, though he can't seem to forget the time we broke up and I started talking to other dudes ...
A. 2 September 2016: Um... he needs a reality check. Broken up business is your business. He has his nose pushed out of joint but that is his problem to fix not yours-you have done nothing wrong here. I would suggest you make it as crystal clear as you can that if he is ... (read in full...)
My Zumba instructor boyfriend was joking with a participant to stop looking at his butt! Did he cross a line?
Q. My boyfriend is a Zumba instructor. Classes are all women. The other day in his class he told a participant jokingly to stop looking at his butt. He said this was harmless flirting. Part of the job. Hmmmm. I am not so sure about that. ...
A. 2 September 2016: I have to agree, I don't think it he crossed a line with the comment. It was pretty tame and a bit of fun IMHO. I mean there is flirting and there is FLIRTING. I think you will be doing your self a disservice if you make a big hoo har coming off as ... (read in full...)
Does she hate me? Or is she tired of me, now?
Q. Hello. I have a lesbian friend, let's say her name is “X”. Me and “X” are close friends. Then, suddenly she admits that she likes me and I laugh coz I like her too. We became so close. She's flirting with me and I did the same. We both decided ...
A. 1 September 2016: Id say she is tired of being dicked around. Creating a fake relationship I dont understand why but in a sense gave this poor girl false hope which is cruel given you know how she felt. You see, this is what happens when people play emotional games. ... (read in full...)
He's married. Wondering why he acted like that? Was he testing me, or was he seeing me as a potential client?
Q. Hi, I just wanted to hear others opinion about this scenario. I'm single mom, professional and attractive as others say. I am not dating and not interested in dating even after 3 years of my divorce. I always get attention and I don't care about...
A. 1 September 2016: well I hardly think he was all about giving good customer service, if anything trying to crack on to a customer, especially in the way he did,
cheesy and totally unprofessional. Nope he was putting the feelers out and magically all his problems with... (read in full...)
Wife won't have sex, how do I bring up having a 3rd person involved?
Q. once more the issue is about threesomes,my wife and i have been married over 30 years, both in our 50's, for the last 5-6 years our sex life has become extinct, i was wondering if a 3rd person in the bedroom would revive the flame, problem is i don...
A. 30 August 2016: Hold the bus, solving your immediate problem by cheating is likely going to cause bigger problems in the long run.For example :Divorce, So my advice would not to go there. 5 year sex drought must be a frustratingly hard and lonely existence but ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has an adultfriendfinder account?
Q. A while ago I caught my long term boyfriend on a transgender dating website, messaging and making plans to meet up with transgender women and men. He was also responding to Craigslist ads and sending them pictures of his private parts. His profile ...
A. 30 August 2016: Ok. If he claimed in the past he was a victim of someone hacking and stealing his credit card details why not use that knowledge to be the reason you have again checked on the sights so you can bring it to his attention that it is "happening again". ... (read in full...)
What can I do? I dream about my fiance's s cousin over and over again
Q. Little bit of a backround, I met my lady 2014 we fell in love she moved in with me very quickly and within a year we were pregnant we have had the baby now live in a 2 bed with my son who is my world and is now 10 months old. I like to think we are ...
A. 29 August 2016: What you describe sounds very much like romanticising. It's unrealistic and as you have already pointed out, dangerous as you run the risk of potentially loose all that is 'real' and already have. You have idolised her in a way that matches her ... (read in full...)
What compels him to still be asking about me considering we broke up so long ago?
Q. I'm just wondering what compels an ex-boyfriend to ask an immediate family member "how you are" almost 16 years after you broke up? I am led to believe that said ex asked specifically about me, and his current partner was present when he asked. ...
A. 27 August 2016: 16 years since, sounds a common response. Wouldn't think anything much of it... (read in full...)
Would this be a good way to lose my virginity? How would I ask?
Q. Is this a good way to lose my viginity? My friends gave me advice for this: have him go down on me until i orgasm, and then we have sex and he gets off and I possibly get off more. I love the idea, but I've never had a guy go down on me either. ...
A. 27 August 2016: If I understand this right, the 'friends' are gf and the 'him' is hypothetical atm? Because I agree, if this suggestion was from a male friend it's more self serving then for your benefit. If not heres my advice, why not wait till the opportunity ... (read in full...)
I want romance and committment in our marriage!
Q. I'm having some emotional problems and troubles with my wife. I wanted to post the question here before I seek the support of counselling. My wife and I have been together for 7 years and married for 4. It was rough in the first couple of years ...
A. 26 August 2016: You can get out of a mortgage and a marriage, what you cant get out of is child support and forever being tied to this woman by parenthood. ... (read in full...)
Is it likely that my GF thinks of nothing when she masturbates? Is she telling lies? I'd like to spice things up.
Q. I've been trying to spice things up and find out what turns my gf on but she told me she doesn't think of anything while she masturbates. Is she lieing? ...
A. 26 August 2016: sounds more like she is too embarrassed to say. Which is fine because she is entitled to keeps her most intimate thoughts to herself. When i say most intimate, I mean things she would prefer to keep as fantasy only. I dunno, personally i think not ... (read in full...)
"You're the kind of weird guys think is interesting." What?
Q. Okay so I'm just a lot to confused on what one of my friends meant by this. I was at one of my male friends house, and he prompted to call me weird. I responded telling I know this, its not anything new to me. He followed by saying "yes but, you're ...
A. 24 August 2016: A delightful and interesting challenge perhaps due to being less than stereotypical of women your age. I see it as a compliment too.... (read in full...)
I feel awkward about my crush. She's 16 and she's the niece of my mother's boyfriend. What should I do?
Q. Hi hopefully someone can offer me advice on an issue that is playing on my mind, I'm a 27 years old and male. So down to the problem, I am starting to become infatuated with my mum's boyfriend's niece. I never really noticed her before but she ...
A. 22 August 2016: Do nothing, thats my advice. I have to agree, 10 years is nothing these days but this is about being age appropriate when she is not yet even an adult. You are in a very powerful position as it can be very alluring for a young girl to be fooled into ... (read in full...)
When I was much younger I wrote love letters to a teacher. Yes, inappropriate, at the time. Why didn't the teacher report me at that time?
Q. I use to write love letters to my teacher, I did not know the boundaries of teacher students I obviously knew you can't have a relationship with a teacher but I had no idea you could get into trouble for writing love letters. Until a different ...
A. 21 August 2016: Maybe he did report them but ask that you not be chatted about them to save you the embarrassment. Who knows? ... (read in full...)
Is this marriage worth saving? 11 years together, married eight years
Q. When I met my husband I fell madly in love with him, I was still a Virgin he was my first love. Life was good.....two years later I realized my husband LOVES attention from females, we fought and fought about it so he called me names..... I'm j...
A. 21 August 2016: You don't want to stay married, already you have your answer. Is any amount of knee jerk grovelling from him going to change for the long run, hardly I don't think. His 'epiphany' is not bought about by your suffering more about his sorry arse being ... (read in full...)
I'm a gay virgin who desperately wants to try anal sex
Q. Hi yalls , im a gay virgin and i really wanna have sex and there's this cute cool experienced guy that's a bit older than me but he's cool and nice and well i'm thinking like maybe i should just have sex with him because i think i'd like it lol. B...
A. 20 August 2016: Gotta do it sometime. Why not now and with someone you fancy. For pete sake people can wait a life time for the "one". Don't want to end up being a 40 year old virgin. Casual sex is meant to be fun and for someone like yourself what better way to ... (read in full...)
Together for 3 years and we have 2 children together. Did he ever really intend to marry me? Am I interpreting this situation accurately?
Q. I need help and i'll try and keep this as short as possible. My boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years almost. We have 2 children together within this time and our relationship was very full on from the beginning with me falling pregnant...
A. 20 August 2016: Sorry but as a woman I believe you got yourself knocked up. Yes, it takes two but ultimately it is your body and your responsibility not to let that happen. He may not be perfect, who is and this may not be your ideal situation but why do you label ... (read in full...)
I regret my hasty words
Q. To make a long story short a little while ago I told a really good friend of mine that I liked her as more than a friend and she ended up telling me that she didn't feel the same way which I tried to be ok with. It all eventually came crashing down. ...
A. 16 August 2016: Those feelings of sadness and regret will hang around for some time, unfortunately that is just the way things go and without any signs of forgiveness from your friend make it all that bit harder to move forward. Being emotionally bruised by ... (read in full...)
I want to know when I will stop bloody crying and feeling so low!
Q. Dear aunts I won't make this too long. I discovered my husband is cheating online with some whore. His behaviour was suspicious as in him turning iPad away from me when I walked Into room. Got Into his iPad which was locked but had managed to see h...
A. 15 August 2016: Your in UK so I don't know what the legalities are but here in Australia mistresses have been known to successfully win their share of money and assets from divorce proceedings if their relationship goes to shit in addition to the marriage. There is ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't help with our daughter in any way and I feel like a single parent
Q. Hiya everyone I have 2 children a boy and a girl my son doesn't see his father as he didn't want him I met a man 4 years ago and we have a little girl who is now 20 month we live together the problem is he will not do anything to help me with our ...
A. 14 August 2016: He may not see it as a problem, his opinion, but knowing there is a problem, you telling him, yet chooses do sit back just makes him selfish and lazy. You need to get vocal and directive. Tell him what you need him to do and show him how to go about ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend always want to cum on my face?
Q. When me and my boyfriend have anal sex, he always wants to cum on my face after. I don't mind once in a while but not every time. I have blown him many times and swallowed many times. Can anyone tell me why he wants this all the time ? ...
A. 14 August 2016: why don't you ask him? If he is willing to do it then Im sure he can muster up an answer. My question to you is_do you like it or is this something you do just to keep him happy?... (read in full...)
How best to help stubborn mother out of debt?
Q. My mom asked me to help her manage her finances. I agreed and gathered up her bills and created a budget. She's around 8,000 in debt from online store credit, credit card, and doctor bills. After creating the budget and realizing she doesn't make ...
A. 13 August 2016: Giving you life is just as much a CHOICE as her poor spending habits and not something to use as a weapon that you should now somehow feel responsible for cleaning up her financial mess- how dare she. ITS HER JOB TO SPEND MONEY ON YOU AS A PARENT. ... (read in full...)
We slept together and now he's gone silent, advice?
Q. I was wondering if any of you could give me some advice on my situation. To start things off I've never been in a Relationship due to the fact I've never been interested and preferred to focus on school, work and enjoying my time with my friends....
A. 13 August 2016: What a jerk. Not that it makes you feel any better right now,but this has happened to a lot of us ladies. Young or old. Personally I wouldn't give him much more than a curt message along the lines of:
" (insert name) Im really disappointed and expe... (read in full...)
I didn't ask for his number the first time we hung out. How and when do I approach him now?
Q. So I am a gay male, and I have a situation I need help. I appreciate all advice. Long story short, I have had a crush on this fellow gay man that lives in the same town. He works at our local coffee shop and well, I felt bold last week to go with my ...
A. 13 August 2016: I say keep it simple:
Go in for coffee-not take away sit in so you up your chance of him and you talking, say hi bit of small talk about how his days going and the other night etc. Ask him if he is close to a having a break and offer to buy him ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend makes me feel terrible about choosing something or someone else over spending time with him
Q. My boyfriend and I always plan to hang out on certain days of the week. But sometimes, other things come up that I would like to go to. It comes to the point where I miss out on events and outings because I know he'll have a fit if I'm not there ...
A. 13 August 2016: Hi Op
If you are breaking plans with him left right and centre and always last minute, then sure he has a reason to be pissed. Otherwise your friends and family are correct. You are entitled to do and go places without him. Things happen and plan... (read in full...)
Should I be considering breaking up with my Gf since I suffered erectile issues with her recently?
Q. So I recently posted about trying not to get too excited when I'm with my new girlfriend. Well, tonight it went the complete opposite direction. We were at her place (she lives with her mom, stepdad, and three siblings) and things were goin...
A. 12 August 2016: Maybe you were worried subconsciously about her family hearing you two going at it. I find it VERY difficult to keep my mojo going when I know my kid is stirring in the next room. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend said he doesn't want me to work with him 'in case I get upset because of what he says to other women?'
Q. Earlier this year my boyfriend of 6 years wanted to go for a very promising job opportunity and encouraged me to go for it as well. He said it wouldn't matter that we worked together, though I was sceptical as I don't want us to see 'too much' of ...
A. 11 August 2016: maybe he doesn't want you blow his cover with the 'LADIES' or "lady' that he is in fact taken. Kinda seems odd and a bit suss to first encourage you to take the job then make up reasons as such not too. Sorry but thats my take on it. One guy, and ... (read in full...)
He earns 8 times what I earn. Is it fair that I contribute 50 . 50 for all dating costs
Q. I've been dating a guy for about 6 months, he earns very good money (about 8 times what I do), should meals out/ trips away be split 50 / 50 , or should he be expected to pay more as he is the higher earner and had a lot more disposable cash than me ...
A. 10 August 2016: I thinks it's fair to a degree. If he is expecting you to contribute to a his choice of champagne budget standard, then no it's not. Good manners should then prevail and him be willing pay the difference without expectation and I think it would be ... (read in full...)
Have I been taken for a fool?
Q. Been seeing someone six months. we met on a dating site. i thought everything was going great. she dumps me out of the blue. for one thing i took myself off of the dating site. she didn't, so i got back on it. she all of a sudden was off of it. so ...
A. 9 August 2016: Your no fool but I think the best way for you to find an answer to your question is to pick up the phone and ask. From an outsider looking in, just because she still had an active account doesn't necessarily mean she was active on it herself. She ... (read in full...)
Should I even tell him? How can I, considering he's married?
Q. I really need to talk about this. Please don't judge me. I know I'm a idiot for getting into this mess. I have been sleeping with an older married man (49). I stopped all contact with him a few weeks ago, as I missed my period. I then went to the ...
A. 9 August 2016: His marriage and infidelity is for him and his wife to deal with. Your responsibility and his is to your child. Tell him and expect not much more that financial support.... (read in full...)
I want to know when I will stop bloody crying and feeling so low!
Q. Dear aunts I won't make this too long. I discovered my husband is cheating online with some whore. His behaviour was suspicious as in him turning iPad away from me when I walked Into room. Got Into his iPad which was locked but had managed to see h...
A. 9 August 2016: Fucking bastard...hope you don't mind me saying, just solidarity sister. With the exception of the loose lipped women of the world, and I ain't talking bout the ones on their face either, we're all sisters just live in different houses. What kind of ... (read in full...)
My worklife has become uncomfortable since I dumped the guy I was dating. He is my boss. How should I handle this?
Q. I started dating a guy from work. I'd been single for a while and it was nice having someone interested in me. He wanted to tell everyone, i wanted to keep it quiet. I had previously dated someone from work albeit 4 years earlier but i wanted it ...
A. 8 August 2016: I think you should stay put. Always be professional and no one can say other wise. He on the other hand, if he continues to make it obviously difficult for you others will pick up on it so how will that make him look- like a jerk. Just because he ... (read in full...)
How can I successfully negotiate these sensitive family issues?
Q. What a great site with assistance from people worldwide. Thanks in advance to all who respond...much appreciated. In about a weeks time I am planning to fly to another city to visit my brother and his second wife who have a two year old daughte...
A. 8 August 2016: I don't think you should feel the need to be negotiating anything. They, on the other hand, need to be accepting of your decisions, what ever they are. personally Id be taking are harder line of suggesting they both act their age instead of their ... (read in full...)
| *vyblue's friends
These are mutual friends, so *vyblue has
added them and they have added *vyblue!
|
