| Latest articles: A rant on the "battle of the sexes" crap
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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19 August 2008: I'm know for over analyzing and going through things and changing my mindset and either understanding things better or getting more confused. On thing that whenever I think about it leaves me both more confused and with clearer ideas is the whole ...
The Boobie Sisterhood: Cheers for breasts of all sizes!
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
21 July 2008: I've felt strangely about my breasts ever since I got them. I was 11 when they were noticeable, and I felt feminine. Even though boys didn't make comments to me (I was super shy, so they didn't mess with me), all my friends said I had such a nice ...
How I'd love to BURY stereotypes...
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 July 2008: Man is the sex-driven provider. Woman is the money-sucking vixen. Man wants sex all the time. Woman wants shoes all the time. Man has to be tough and not cry. Woman has to be sexy if single, whiney if married. What is it with stereotypes? The...
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My penis is aroused every morning, is that normal?
Q. Hi. I am 22 year old guy. Every morning when i wake up my penis is erected and really hard. I am a virgin and i masturbate quite often. (daily or once every two days). I masturbate to pornography. I think i dream too much about the pornography,...
A. 2 November 2008: I've heard it's normal, regardless of masturbation or pornography watching... even regardless of sexy dreams... it's just a thing that guy's penises do, as far as I'm concerned. So don't worry it just means your healthy.... (read in full...)
How can I change my appearance without spending a fortune?
Q. Hi, I'm 18 years old (turning 19 in just under four months) and I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years. My general appearance is that of a punkish, hippie(ish) Luna Lovegood. My boyfriend's into Kat Von D's and Liz Vicious types. I want to ...
A. 1 November 2008: Huh... well, it's not that hard with all the products available today. The good thing is you can try a few things that aren't permanent, because you may outgrow this phase later in life. that's why I wouldn't recommend tattooing your face like K... (read in full...)
Why do women rationalise their cheating?
Q. Why do women Rationalise their cheating? Men cheat a lot more than women but at the very least they know what they're doing is wrong. When a man is generally caught cheating, whether he cares or not, he's not going to argue about what he's done, but ...
A. 1 November 2008: Hmm... I think women cheat s much as guys do, they just hide it better. Oops, I'm a woman and I'm trash talking my gender, but there are some ugly truths about women that we have to accept. Me, for one, I hate cheaters and think it's wrong no matter ... (read in full...)
Wrong feelings for an older man?
Q. Hey im 16 and im having feelings for a guy that is 27. The thing is he used to work at my school as a hallmonitor. i miss seeing him there and always ask his other hallmontior friend how is he doing and if he could get in contact with me. I just...
A. 1 November 2008: Hmm... this brings back memories. I used to have a thing for a hall monitor back when I was in highschool, though I knew him from before he started working at school and he kinda liked me too, I was 17 and he was 24... I didn't work, because after I ... (read in full...)
Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??!
Q. Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??! Theyre so nice when they want sumthing then they discard you like a piece of rubbish. They can be the best boyfriend ever but wont think twice about dumping you for another woman and ...
A. 30 October 2008: One more thing to add, as this topic hits a nerve (I've never been around jerks you know... so yes, I think it's insulting to men).
NICE GUYS FINISH LAST. Sad, but true. Yes, it's cliche. But true.
The way that you generalize about guys being... (read in full...)
I feel so completely insecure sexually with her now, and suspicious of her reasons of being with me.
Q. Dear everyone. I think I am at a about to end my relationship with my girlfriend, but I really wish I could just get over this problem instead. I have become uncontrollably jealous and insecure in this relationship and regardless of what it takes, ...
A. 29 October 2008: Normally I'd say get over her past, because I've had problems with my boyfriend because of my past and think it's unfiar (mind you, my "past" is very tame, almost NOTHING sexual happened). But I digress.
Look, you sound like a sweet, caring m... (read in full...)
Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??!
Q. Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??! Theyre so nice when they want sumthing then they discard you like a piece of rubbish. They can be the best boyfriend ever but wont think twice about dumping you for another woman and ...
A. 29 October 2008: I'm sorry that you're going through this. You've probably had the bad luck of dating losers, jerks, etc. I know for a fact that a lot of men aren't like this.
Just remember that just because you've dated jerks, it doesn't mean it'll always b... (read in full...)
I am her first boyfriend, she is very nervous when I am close, how can I help her relax?
Q. My gf is always very nervous when we are together especially when i hold her hand or touch her leg or when we kissed for the first time. She is very great to be around when she is nervous too but i sort of feel bad for making her feel nervous. And ...
A. 7 October 2008: Ah, new, sweet love. Don't feel bad because she feels nervous... quite the contrary! Having a first boyfriend is very, very exciting, and being nervous is part of that excitement. Trust me, she is enjoying this so much. Just be gentle with her, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is so shallow about my hair...To weave, or not to weave!
Q. Ok so my problem is that my boyfriend is reeeally shallow and this is why. He's creole(blk and french) he's only dated mixed females, he's told me in the past that his preference are females that have "good hair" little breast,big butt and that ...
A. 3 October 2008: Are you serious? Is he really THAT shallow? Oh my God, it's extremely wrong of him to be making you feel bad about this! It's YOUR hair, attached to your head, and I'm pretty sure it's gorgeous no matter what. He's creepy. Really, so obsessed with ... (read in full...)
He has been looking at porn since I got pregnant! How do I aproach him about this issue?
Q. My husband and I have been married for just over a year. We dated for four years before deciding to get married. We seemed to be on the same page about all the big decisions, including having children young. I am now almost 6 months pregnant. I ...
A. 19 September 2008: Christ! Again a porn debate?
I can understand women who get insecure, I know I do, and being insecure while pregnant, I think is VERY understandable. But these kinds of insecurities, hurtful as they may be, are purely irrational... to blame pr... (read in full...)
My wife isn't attracted to me anymore and cheated on me, can we make this work?
Q. my wife(together 5 years married oe year)says she isent attracted to me anymore, and that she loves me but isnt in love with me and had felt that way for a long time. i knew we had our differences but i did not see this coming. i asked her if there...
A. 7 September 2008: Your wife is quite selfish, really. Don't put up with it. She isn't willing to make it work, from what I gather. Hard as it may be, leave her. Pick yourself up, and find someone who will adore you and and be all over you, and I promise, it'll b... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend deny he has watched porn with all the evidense on his face?
Q. i kee finding evidence of porn viewed on my partners pc but when i confront him about it he adamantly denies it, when it is blatantly obvious! we are from different countries which has meant that we have been apat for months at a time! please ...
A. 7 September 2008: Hmm, I've read about psychology and "multiple intelligences". And how children (it was about educational environments, mind you) sometimes just don't get messages across by just listening. Sometimes something as simple as writing it down can make a ... (read in full...)
I didn't want to have sex with him and he went ballistic!
Q. Please help me im so heart broken. Should i stay or not? We went to the museum today everything was so fun.. When then he said lets go to (his friends names house) and he wanted to have sex but his friend was home. So i didnt want to of cours...
A. 1 September 2008: Leave him! I agree with dearkelja, he's abusive, and he's treating you as a possesion! HE doesn't respect you. You deserve much better, plus you're so young, you should be experiencing the fun of adolescence rather than the suffering he's putting ... (read in full...)
How do you get that spark back in a relationship?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a few months. He recently told me that he lost that magically spark for me. He is still in love with me but, he just misses the way things used to be when we first met.Is there anyway to get that spark ...
A. 18 August 2008: What does he mean by "lost the spark"? Is it because he no longer gets that "butterfly in the stomach" rush? If so, it may be that the "honeymoon phase" is over. You know, you no longer produce dopamine, and you're settling down, producing other ... (read in full...)
Do men in relationships want to have sex with other women? How much and how often?
Q. How much do guys in a relationship want to have sex with other females? I'm curious. I don't ever get the urge to have sex with some other guy. I wonder if it's the same for men? Today I was telling my boyfriend how weird it'd be for me if he was...
A. 30 July 2008: Tisha, I wasn't. True I brought up the topic, only because we had been talking about a gay friend of my sister who happnes to be with a bi boy. Then I thought it'd be weird if my boyfriend was bi, and commented, in a joking way. Then we talked about ... (read in full...)
I don't love my husband any more. Should I leave him?
Q. I have been with my husband for 11 yrs and I think I've made a mistake marrying him and did so too young. He is a lovely man - kind, trustworthy, caring, intelligent... The problem is I just don't love him anymore and sometimes find myself almo...
A. 27 July 2008: Well, if you're unhappy, then yes. Plus, if he's in love with you, it's also be unfair on him to be with someone who doesn't love him anymore. ... (read in full...)
I am 14, never been kissed, boy, I like is taking me to the mall, and wants to kiss me, I am afraid to kiss him, what can I do, to not be so afraid??
Q. Ok im 14 and ive never been kissed... there is this guy i really like and im going to the mall with him in a week... he told me he to kiss me... i want to kiss him but im scared...
A. 15 July 2008: Ah, I remember when I was a 14 year old never-been-kissed girl... I was so anxious and wondered how my first kiss was going to be like! I didn't know what to expect, what to do... I wanted it so much, yet I didn't because I was afraid of the whole ... (read in full...)
Are there ANY relationships that work out?
Q. I stumbled across this site looking for some advice...and came out quite discouraged =[ Does anyone know of a functional relationship? Of a healthy marriage in which mistakes are made but forgiveness is extended and the love is still strong? D...
A. 14 July 2008: Yeah, my parents have been married for almost 28 years, and sure they have had their issues, but nothing recurring, just circumstancial disagreements. But it's all good. I wish I get into that kind of marriage sometime. They just have this amazing ... (read in full...)
I am 7 months pregnant and my boyfriend does not want to stop having sex...
Q. Im 17 and my bf is 23. i am 7 months pregnant and he does not want to stop having sex. i get tired and just wanna be loved. be4 i got pregnant we would have sex 5 times a day and he loved it but i cant do it anymore. hes the only person im allowed ...
A. 10 July 2008: What? "Not allowed to have friends"? Red flags all over... you're not his slave. Sadly you're pregnant, so it's not too easy to get up and RUN away from him as fast as you can!... (read in full...)
Which one of my sisters should I believe?
Q. hi i'm getting married next month and since i'm a virgin i asked my sisters for help. my eldest sister says that i should stop the intercourse after i lose my virginty immediately, otherwise i will damage my vagina. but my other sister says it's o...
A. 10 July 2008: That's a new one to me... that you have to stop immediately because it damages your vagina.
Now, the one about being ok to continue... that sounds more familiar.
As far as I understand, it's ok to continue, just as long as YOU feel comfortable... (read in full...)
If my relationship is a bit stale, is it okay to "hook up" with someone and keep it a secret?
Q. Hell. What does everyone think about hooking up with someone you fancy if your primary relationship is a bit stale? Will it damage your primary relationship if you can just keep things physical? This is from a womans point of view or will it damage ...
A. 4 July 2008: Look it's simple. You can't have it all in life without sacrifices. If you cheat, well, if you're caught it's obvious what's gonna happen - you'll lose your "primary" relationship. If you want sex break up with your partner and go have sex with ... (read in full...)
I'm having a breakdown due to my possessiveness over this guy! I hate myself...
Q. hi, im not sure if this is about a relationship or not but im havig a bit of a breakdown i think the guy im seeing who i love very very much is always out and abotu i seehim when i can etc and normally it doesnt bother me the last two days i havnt...
A. 4 July 2008: I think you're still not over the loss of your friend, which is understandable. This might have to do in part with your "posesiveness" - you want to know where your bf is at every moment because you're afraid of losing him (and going over the pain ... (read in full...)
How do porn stars last so long?
Q. I watch porn and I was wondering.. how do they last that long? They can't all use Viagra can they? What's there secret?...
A. 4 July 2008: They've probably desensitized themselves. Kind of like what happens when you masturbate too much. You start lasting longer because you're becoming used to the same thing all the time. I've heard from my male friends there are techniques to last ... (read in full...)
How do I get over an "emotional abuser"?
Q. How do I get over an emotional abuser? I love him deeply, but he always found flaws in me... He was very loving and respectful most of the time. But when he''d get mad and make me cry, he'd get even angrier. It's true I made mistakes, but st...
A. 2 July 2008: He said he's not an abuser. He said he's deeply hurt that I don't love him and that I think of him that way. Now he said he's gonna go back to his ex crush, so he won't be thinking of me all the time. Why does he have to say thta to me? How can I ... (read in full...)
I'm the one with the problem... Hes perfect.
Q. My Boyfriend is a senior in HS, while i'm only a sophomore. We're both virgins and kinda prude, which isn't a bad thing at all. He respects me so much and hes so comfortable with moving very very slow... he says he will never break up with me, but ...
A. 27 June 2008: Also, sex isn't necessarily related to love. While yes, you enjoy the physical aspect, that doesn't mean you're only "using him for pleasing you". You probably do care about him and maybe even love him. So don't worry, it's not a bad thing.... (read in full...)
I'm the one with the problem... Hes perfect.
Q. My Boyfriend is a senior in HS, while i'm only a sophomore. We're both virgins and kinda prude, which isn't a bad thing at all. He respects me so much and hes so comfortable with moving very very slow... he says he will never break up with me, but ...
A. 27 June 2008: Look, honey, you have no problem. You're only a sophomore, which means you're like 15, 16... It's normal, this thing you're going through. Your hormones are all over the place! You're normal, it's totally natural... this is you starting to discover ... (read in full...)
Five months without a period, and I'm a virgin - What's going on?
Q. I don't think anything is severely wrong, but i am a virgin and I got my first period when i was 11. I am 15 now, and Its been almost 5 months since my last one, and when i get it it last 4 days at most and is very very light. My mood swings are all ...
A. 27 June 2008: It could be stress. It happened to me once, but I only missed my period for one month. There are many factors. It could be hormonal, but there would've been more changes, I believe.
Have you lost weight? Like, a lot of weight? Because sometime... (read in full...)
I love her and I trust her, so why do I get so jealous?
Q. Ok, well i have been in a relationship with this girl for eight months. I know i love her, if anything happened to her i swear i would die. And i know she loves me. I really think im the problem though. I trust her, i know she would never cheat on ...
A. 24 June 2008: Well, first of all... Hola!!!!
Now, I understand what you mean. It happens with me and my boyfriend. It doesn't mean you don't love each other, although some people may say that jealousy is not love. Well, yeah, I agree to a point, but it's bec... (read in full...)
Porn Wars II-May The Foreskin Be With You
Q. Debates surrounding porn often generate more heat than light and any areas of genuine concern can get blurred when people let their emotions cloud their reason. Porn has always been with us under various guises ever since the cavemen ogled drawings ...
A. 23 June 2008: Oh, and another thing:
The reason porn is so over the top, so blunt, so "tasteless" a s a lot your people say, and nothing like real sex is because... drum roll please...
... well, it has to give a big shot of stimuli!!! It's made to provide ... (read in full...)
Porn Wars II-May The Foreskin Be With You
Q. Debates surrounding porn often generate more heat than light and any areas of genuine concern can get blurred when people let their emotions cloud their reason. Porn has always been with us under various guises ever since the cavemen ogled drawings ...
A. 23 June 2008: "Women can emotionaly project themselves into a detailed fantasy of the knight in shining armour seducing the virgin maiden by candlelight on a bearskin rug in front of a roaring log fire while celestial cherubs pluck their harps."
LOL! I was just... (read in full...)
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