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< Prev1234567891011Next > [14 pages, 514 answers]

Is it fair that I don't want my boyfriend to go drinking with his female colleagues?

Q.   Hey guys :) so I've boyfriend for 6 years now, we are usually very happy, and we've been living together for 1 year. Neither of us go out drinking a lot (we are both very homely). Well recently boyfriend started a new office job, and his team has...

A.   30 July 2016: I don't think you should forbid him to go out with his work colleagues. That's too controlling. How would you feel if he put restrictions on your outings? This is more about your insecurities, which you need to deal with. Going out with his work ... (read in full...)

Am I being too demanding and demonstrating a "princess attitude" for expecting a Lil common courtesy?

Q.   I am 36 years old not much experienced in dating. If a guy is supposed to pick you up at 2.00 to 3.00 and until 1 pm didn't tell you of any change of plans. When you message him at 2.15 informs you that he won't be able to make it. Is it commo...

A.   2 July 2016: I think he's still seeing this other girl and you are his side chick. I would break up with someone like that. I don't care if someone accuses me of having a princess attitude. If a man does not treat me well, I will find another man who want... (read in full...)

Is this fair? I've developed depression due to my concerns. Should she be contributing more? She leaves me to pay everything in order for us to live

Q.   I'm feeling incredibly depressed lately. Be been married for 1year, we've been together for over 6years. I really do love her but I feel like she is bringing nothing to our relationship. She got a great degree from a state university, she cou...

A.   2 July 2016: You need to have a serious talk with her about sharing the responsibility of running a home, and by serious I mean you have to be firm. You should show her visually (maybe by means of a spreadsheet) how much money is involved in running a ... (read in full...)

Four months into the relationship, so why is he choosing to sleep in a different bed to me?

Q.   Dear Cupid I'm dating a guy younger than me for past 4 months. We hang around in his place during weekend. It's the second time I find him sleeping in living room because he says he steal his blanket and he can't sleep or I turn around a lot. ...

A.   25 June 2016: It doesn't sound like the two of you are compatible for each other. The thrill of the relationship seems to be waning, so it's natural to just drift apart. I would suggest you keep your options open for a more compatible mate.... (read in full...)

Not sure if 'No' means no for good

Q.   Asked a female out for a drink from the office of where I work and she said she would get back to me. And she did, unfortunately it wasn't good news. It was a rejection reply. I absolutely hate them. Anyway she explained she wasn't able to see me ...

A.   25 June 2016: It could be that she's going through something personal and private and does not think it's appropriate to go into details about why she is busy. It also could be that she is not interested in you. Either way, I'd say give it a couple of months ... (read in full...)

My friend has gone away to work on a project. Plus family issues and my own sadness. How can I go forward?

Q.   My father drinks a lot and it's having an effect on his relationship with my mother. I feel powerless and feel I can't doing anything to make it right. They argue, swear at each other and doors always slam. I've told dad to go to counselling...

A.   4 June 2016: It sounds like you are having a really tough time. I can empathize because I was in the same situation when I was your age. The one thing that saved me from falling into a deep depression is that I got out of that situation and moved out on my ... (read in full...)

Confused and angry with myself for caring

Q.   Hi everyone I lost my lovely husband 2 years ago and recently found someone else who I thought was very nice and charming. Although to begin with I was not very interested he was so nice and attentive and I felt flattered that someone was ...

A.   14 September 2015: Don't beat yourself up about this. It happens to the best of us. Call it an experience and try to look at all the positives you got out of it. He came into your life to make you feel wanted, desired and loved again, and he helped you move on from ... (read in full...)

Is there ever a right time to give someone a piece of your mind?

Q.   Help. My friend who I thought was a friend was making a play for my man all along. We split up and he blocked me and then chose her instead of me, but mainly because she was stirring things up between us with lies and my ex chose to believe her ...

A.   29 August 2015: Go for it sweetheart. Tell that B&*^% off. It feels good to blow your top once in a while, and in this situation, you have a damn right to tell her off, using any and all profanity you wish to express. Get it out of your system, and then purge ... (read in full...)

I'm dating a woman who's bigger and I'm totally into her. Why do some people question my choice, my preferences and my motives?

Q.   There seems to be an issue that's come up a lot in my life and I'm wondering if others have perhaps have experienced the same thing. Ever since I was a teenager I have been more attracted to females that are more full-figured. Its not that I don...

A.   23 August 2015: Sizeism: prejudice or discrimination on the grounds of a person's size. I don't think this kind of discrimination has been brought to the forefront like racism or homophobia. A lot of people discriminate against size. Your post really gives a ... (read in full...)

Why would this woman I thought was my friend turn on me and befriend my daughter?

Q.   I have had a friend for nearly 20 years. At least, I always thought of her as a friend. We first met when I was a struggling single parent who was attending college classes and working. We bonded immediately at a church function and would spend ...

A.   22 August 2015: Maybe she is going through a tough time in her life and is taking it out on the people she loves. Bitterness / depression / mental illness can lead to erratic behaviour like this. When someone is depressed, mentally stressed or on the verge of a ... (read in full...)

Why do most guys like big boobs so much?

Q.   Why do most men (especially guys my age...) like big boobs so much? As I see it, it's just extra fat! And last time I checked, for men, too much fat is bad. I have small breasts and feel so inadequate. Breasts are so "out there" (unlike a penis - ...

A.   13 August 2015: I know a lot of men who do not like big boobs. One man even said that he loves a mouthful, no more, and he had a small mouth;) As far as I'm concerned big boobs is just a fad. At one time, the "Twiggy" look was in and she hardly had any boobs. ... (read in full...)

I think I'm on the untrustworthy woman from college's target list to be friends and don't want to be, so what can I do?

Q.   There is a woman who lives very near to where I do and goes to the same college as me who I do not trust and don't want to be friends with but she has what I think is a 'strategy' of being absolutely charming to everyone, usually with her own goals ...

A.   10 August 2015: I know what it's like dealing with a narcissist. This personality type is the stuff of nightmares. I think you need to set boundaries and distance with this woman and tell her No, if she asks to meet you for a drink. I do this all the time wit... (read in full...)

What makes a man fall in love with a woman and want only her?

Q.   What makes a man fall in love with a woman and want only her?...

A.   7 August 2015: Great sex, great connection, great conversation, and when a man realizes that a woman accepts him at his core, even when he's not perfect, and still loves him. I was at a friend's wedding years ago, and when the groom spoke, he became emotional ... (read in full...)

Should I respond or shut it down?

Q.   Sheesh this is a long one, sorry! I was with this guy for almost 2 years. While it wasn't the best of relationships (it was rife with cheating and all sorts of lies and disrespect) he was my first pretty much everything and I really really li...

A.   26 June 2015: I know this may not be the usual advice given, but I really believe that you need to go through the ups and downs of this friendship until you realize deep down that you deserve to be loved by someone fully. The lesson you need to learn from this ... (read in full...)

Am I justified in feeling really worried that this secret will get out?

Q.   The other night I fooled around with this guy who has a gf and I feel so guilty. I don't even fancy him at all i was sooo drunk I know it's not an exuse but I never usually get that drunk and I'm absolutely disgusted in my self now and can't stop...

A.   15 June 2015: Don't worry about it getting out. If it did, it serves him right. He had no right to take advantage of you in your inebriated state to get his freak on. You did nothing wrong, and please don't fret about it. If he comes back to you trying to make ... (read in full...)

How do I get my lazy bf to clean up after him self?? Bitching hasn't helped.

Q.   I've been dating my.boyfriend for over 2 years and we live together I'm 21 and he's 22. We used to have fun together, do stuff together, go everywhere together. But now all he does is sit at home stay in side and play his stupid video games. He don'...

A.   15 May 2015: Make him pay for a cleaning lady to come in and clean the place regularly. This will alleviate some stress for you. If he does not want to do this, then I would suggest that you live in separate residences, but you can still remain a couple.... (read in full...)

She asked me to do a project for her...after she already asked somebody else to do the same thing!

Q.   Hi, I am a single male in NYC. I know this woman who is very pretty and married. Let's call her S. I guess you can say we are friendly acquaintances. She has done things which have offended me in the past, like planning to meet up and then canceli...

A.   15 May 2015: If I were in your shoes, yes I would be offended by what she did. She uses people. I think this is what you picked up on and you reacted angrily. I don't think she sounds like a very good friend.... (read in full...)

WISHING ALL THE AUNTS AND UNCLES A VERY HAPPY HOLIDAY!

Q.   It has been a most enjoyable year being on Dear Cupid, and reading all of your wonder articles and advice. I am very inspired by the powerful advice given by all of you, and I am proud to be amongst such intelligent and thoughtful people. I ap...

A.   25 April 2015: I just saw this, and I know I'm quite late, but I also wanted to wish you all the best. Your advice is amazing and from the heart. I really enjoy reading your thoughtful contributions:) Peace and love back to you:)... (read in full...)

I feel stuck. Is it reasonable that I feel so hurt at his lack of priority for me in his life?

Q.   I have just ended a relationship with my boyfriend due to his lack of time for me. He says he will come over and talk but says he is busy and has a lot on with work. He is self employed but spends a lot of time procrastinating and chatting to custo...

A.   25 April 2015: People who own their own business are forced to become workaholics. Time is money. If your ex bf wants his business to succeed and he is passionate about it, then it will be his number one priority for a while. He's not procrastinating when he's ... (read in full...)

Twin brothers - I have a crush on one, but I think the other twin likes me. What can I do?

Q.   Hey friends, so I need advice. I'm a female, in college, and I met this pair of twins - we'll call them "A" and "B". Both of them are super nice, and we started talking and all 3 of us just clicked immediately. A is super outgoing, and so...

A.   25 April 2015: Try to spend more time with B and ignore A for a bit. You'll soon know if B reciprocates your feelings. By spending more time with A, you are giving B the impression that you prefer A. By spending more time with B, you are giving B the ... (read in full...)

Should just leave it or ask my mother why she felt the need to say such a thing?

Q.   I had my first child when I was 17 with my now ex boyfriend. Due to ill health my mother spent a lot of time looking after my child as I have epilepsy and found it hard to handle both at the time. As my mother couldn't take my epilepsy away bu...

A.   25 April 2015: I think you are being extra sensitive...possibly due to the pregnancy. Just leave it. Your mom wasn't being mean. She was just being practical.... (read in full...)

Can someone explain it to me? Why would a girl subject herself to being used and discarded?

Q.   I have a friend who has the most uncanny ability to be a jerk to specifically women he just hooks up with and still have them at his beck and call. I've seen it with my own two eyes. It's the weirdest dynamic I've ever seen. Most recently, he had a...

A.   20 April 2015: It sounds like you're into this guy more than those girls. I don't think he was as mean to them as he wants you to believe and I think they all had fun on this trip. Who knows...maybe these girls used him for sex too. I think you like this guy ... (read in full...)

Could there be "real love" in an emotional affair?

Q.   I have realized now that I've been in a co-dependent relationship. I also married my partner of years because I didn't think I'd ever find "the one" for me and I was ok with that. All I wanted was to be able to just go through life and survive. I've ...

A.   23 March 2015: You speak with such emotional maturity. You beautifully described the angst we all experience when we are trying to figure out what love is. I believe that love is subjective. If you feel that the strong connection you had with your co-worker is ... (read in full...)

I broke up with him, am I doing the right thing?

Q.   Hi, I'm a 21 year old girl who had been dating a boy for three years. He was the first and only guy I have ever kissed and dated. We were in a very stable relationship and I love him a lot, I think he would be my ideal husband but the thing is: ...

A.   5 March 2015: Only time will tell whether you made a mistake or not. Something similar happened to me when I was your age. A good man who would have been a good husband, father to my kids and a wonderful provider, wanted to marry me. I felt I had not lived my ... (read in full...)

Exhausted from the rollercoaster of emotions. How can I get the strength to leave my boyfriend?

Q.   I need to break up with my boyfriend but I can't bring myself to do it. We've been together for years but I'm miserable. He often neglects me and I'm constantly feeling nervous, angry, paranoid and so many other negative emotions. We broke up once ...

A.   4 March 2015: If he does move on after the break-up, I can guarantee that he won't treat the next woman better. Most likely, you're the only woman who puts up with his roller coaster behaviour. Not many women will. When the next woman dumps him, guaranteed ... (read in full...)

Do you think I was rude and attacking? And what should I do

Q.   My boyfriend is super upset at me right now, and I think he is overreacting. Last week he was helping me update my macbook, as he knows more about technology than I do, and helping me make things faster. He kept wanting to download mack...

A.   7 February 2015: Your bf sounds like my ex husband. We had fights like this all the time. In retrospect I realize that we just were not compatible. He needed someone to stroke his ego all the time, and make him feel like he was king of the jungle, and I was a ... (read in full...)

I don't have the confidence to come out to my housemate but feel uncomfortable in my own home

Q.   I currently have a new housemate who has moved from Pakistan. He is muslim and does not realize I am gay. I get along with him so far, because I try and keep conversation to small talk. However, his main focal point of conversation is picking up ...

A.   28 January 2015: Why are you so afraid to come out to him? You are who you are. He is who he is. Be more confident in yourself. Be proud of yourself. I think it's kismet that the two of you crossed paths. You are both more alike than you think. You are both ... (read in full...)

He told me that I am exciting but we have nothing in common. Do you think that's potential for a future?

Q.   I have been dating a guy I met online for almost three months. During these period we have had ups and downs, but enjoy each other’s company. We just spend a three day weekend together out of town and although we had a small discussion, overall we ...

A.   23 January 2015: Yes! There is a lot of hope in your relationship having a future. When I find someone different and exciting, it usually means I'm very attracted to them and maybe even falling a little for them. "We have nothing in common" sounds like he's ... (read in full...)

I told him no contact and I blocked him, but he got mad. Should I unblock him to send him one last message?

Q.   I started No Contact on Sunday so that I could start healing from my ex (of 10 months). Before cutting him off, I sent a one liner email saying "I wish you the best." Then blocked him on Facebook and erased him from my messenger contact list. ...

A.   23 January 2015: Yes, you should break contact and give him the respect of a proper reason why you need to do it...unless of course you fear that he will be abusive, then don't...But if there is no fear involved, except the fear of your heart breaking further, I ... (read in full...)

I told him no contact and I blocked him, but he got mad. Should I unblock him to send him one last message?

Q.   I started No Contact on Sunday so that I could start healing from my ex (of 10 months). Before cutting him off, I sent a one liner email saying "I wish you the best." Then blocked him on Facebook and erased him from my messenger contact list. ...

A.   23 January 2015: Yes, you should break contact and give him the respect of a proper reason why you need to do it...unless of course you fear that he will be abusive, then don't...But if there is no fear involved, except the fear of your heart breaking further, I ... (read in full...)

What did she break-up with me out of the blue? Ex bf, new dude or was she not done playing the field yet?

Q.   I am a 44 yr old man, got dumped over a month ago, by my gf of 13 months. she was the love of my life. we were in-separable, did everything together, intimacy was awesome, I felt it was for her also. hours upon hours of conversation about anything ...

A.   1 December 2014: I am sorry this happened to you. This kind of heartbreak is like experiencing a death. This happened to me over three years ago with a guy whom I thought was the love of my life. Out of the blue I was dumped. I found out later that there was ... (read in full...)

Confused, but better than most!

Q.   I have been married for 8 year and have known my wife for 10. I have a near photographic memory and remember many things that people tell me. 10 years ago I contracted an STD from my wife. She found out she had it from a medical checkup. No big ...

A.   24 November 2014: What you are doing to your wife is hurtful and childish. If I were in her shoes, I'd seriously consider a divorce, because basically you told her that she's not the girl you thought she was and you regret marrying her. If she cheated on you in the ... (read in full...)

Was a wrong to contact a women to see if her baby was my boyfriends ?

Q.   I recently found out that a few months before my boyfriend met me he had an affair with a married women . I found old text messages he still had on his iPhone with nude pics they sent each other. he admitted he slept with her but didn't know she was ...

A.   17 October 2014: I don't blame you for wanting to know. The impact of this possibly being his kid is enormous. It really should have been your bf to contact her about the pregnancy, but he just wants to bury his head in the sand about it, because it is too much ... (read in full...)

Should I ask my G/f about why she had her phone set to private?

Q.   Hi. I probably shouldn't read too much into this but me and my girlfriend took a short break. We didn't see eachother, call or txt for 5 days. I dropped of a card and candy on her doorstep and she txted me back with appreciation and telling me she ...

A.   12 October 2014: I don't think there is anything to worry about. I've set my number to private to call back a strange number that showed up on my phone (in case it was a telemarketer), and sometimes I forget to switch back to show caller ID. You should ask her ... (read in full...)

I've discovered what he and his mother think about me and it's very hurtful! I don't know what to do next!

Q.   My bf of 4yrs and I are currently on a sort of "break". It has been about a month now. The reason for the break is something very minor and working towards repairing our relationship. Today I logged into my other laptop and I realised that he...

A.   8 October 2014: Don't beat yourself up about taking a look at his facebook message. I actually think it was your guardian angels that led you to the truth. Heed their warning. If a man did that to me, I would cut him out of my life for good. It means he does ... (read in full...)

Please stop this ride, I want to get off!

Q.   Dear cupid,I still find myself still crushing over a guy I met years ago.We talk on and off from time to time.I still keep in contact with his family even though we aren't together.This man keeps sending me on a emotional ride and I really don't ...

A.   7 October 2014: The best way to stop this ride is to declare your love for him and see how he reacts. If he does not return the feelings, then that would be a clear message to you that a relationship will never happen. If he returns your love then by all means ... (read in full...)

I thought he liked me! What happened?

Q.   A co-worker and I really hit it off when we met. He kept calling me pretty and beautiful, he kept telling me the dates me wanted to take me on, he said I was an amazing girl and he couldn't get over how I could be single. He would call me and we ...

A.   5 October 2014: If you had sex with him then this is what he was after. He was trying to disguise his true intent with empty promises. Don't beat yourself up about having sex with him. If a man's goal is just to sleep with a woman, he'll lose interest if they ... (read in full...)

Am I wrong to keep my distance?

Q.   Hi there, so my boyfriend of two months is currently in rehab and he's upset because it's one that's quite neglected, without much support.I have been very supportive, phoning him as much as possible, bringing him things to make him feel better ...

A.   2 October 2014: I think you should go with the flow of how you feel. Don't make it a black or white situation where you make extreme decisions. If you feel the need to keep the distance for now, then do it, and when you feel the need to reach out to him again, do ... (read in full...)

I have a feeling he's being unfaithful -- what do you think?

Q.   Okay. So I've been in a relationship for a little over two years. Right at the start of our relationship I had a gut feeling he was lying to me and seeing someone else. I was right. But I will never feel like I really know the true story because he ...

A.   27 September 2014: I think that the reason you are having this outburst and crying yourself to sleep every night is because you know that you have to leave this relationship. The trust has been broken and it seems irreparable at this point. If your gut is telling ... (read in full...)

Do I ask him about the condoms in his trash?

Q.   I feel like a complete idiot for even asking this, but would you ask your boyfriend why he had a couple of used condoms in his rubbish bin when you have been away for a few days and you don't even use condoms?! I went away for a five day mini br...

A.   27 September 2014: That is very suspicious. If you confront him, you may not get the truth. He may say it was his friend or use some other lame excuse. By all means ask him about it. Listen carefully to his excuse, and then just be more wary of signs of cheating ... (read in full...)

Should I Tell My Friend About her Friend Quizzing Me?

Q.   I recently went to an event to support a friend. While I was there I spoke with two of her friends there who were a couple. The wife started asking me multiple questions about my friend including her work schedule. I simply said I didn't know her ...

A.   25 September 2014: I don't think you should bring this up with your friend. You're not 100% sure about the husband being at the singles event, and asking about someone's schedule is hardly an issue to discuss, unless you want to stoke the fire and create some gossip.... (read in full...)

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