He says he can't marry me because of his parents but we are intimate. Should I stop this?
Q. Well I don't know from where do I start. I'm in a very difficult condition to be understood by anyone. My story has started one year back when I kissed him for the first time. It's not that I haven't kissed any guy before him but with him something ...
A. 4 December 2013: I am so sorry to hear this. It's his loss. This happened to a friend of mine at work. Thirty years ago, the man she was in love with, left her, because his parents did not approve of their relationship. He opted for the arranged marriage. ... (read in full...)
I feel I made an inappropriate comment on a date and that it might have put the guy off
Q. I went on a date last week with a guy and made an inappropriate comment. I mentioned it being lady's night and the ticket would be less expensive. He said, "you're saved" and I said, "not me, you." He began to laugh but more like a damn haha ...
A. 7 September 2013: I don't think your comment was inappropriate, and if he took offense to it then you're better off without him. If he's turned off by not wanting to pay for your half price ticket, he's a cheapskate and he's not generous at all. I think it was ... (read in full...)
I had my android phone stolen and there were compromising photos of me on it. I feel sick!
Q. Hi, i know this is a relationship forum. but this has literally been killing me inside. i recently lost my android smart phone. It was stolen because after i called it, it rang a few times, after 5-6 calls, it stopped. So i'm assuming the thi...
A. 6 September 2013: I'm sure the pics are not as bad as you think they are and the thief may have no interest in them. For all you know the thief is female and she would delete them as soon as she saw them. My guess is that the thief sold your phone to someone else ... (read in full...)
I'm burdened with stress from unplanned pregnancy to finding out father is very ill
Q. My life is in turmoil right now and i have no one to talk to. My girlfriend of 4 years just found out she is 2 months pregnant and because she feels her life is not where it should be right now, she wants to have an abortion. I have a post grad...
A. 1 September 2013: Tell your girlfriend how much you want this baby. Why have the engagement in December? Why not propose to her now? I would also recommend counselling - either individual or couples counselling to help you to navigate through this tough time in ... (read in full...)
I snooped on her computer and don't like what I found!
Q. a couple of months ago i was visiting my LD girlfriend and i had lots of time alone at her place while she was at school. i snooped into her computer historial out of couriosity and i found she had visited some hook up site afew times for the last ...
A. 31 August 2013: Wow! That is troubling evidence. Are you sure that it is her that's visiting these sites or maybe it's a sibling or friend who used her computer. Does she have house mates? Is this the only evidence you have that she is cheating or are there ... (read in full...)
Secretive girlfriend! How do I approach this?
Q. Been reading through articles on here and they are very useful. However I need some advice still. My g/f has become extremely secretive with texts and calls over the past month or so. There's a guy she's been speaking to and she has become quite ...
A. 30 August 2013: She is definitely cheating, maybe not physically but definitely she is emotionally cheating on you. My ex husband was acting the same way with his phone. One night I snuck into the bathroom with his phone and went through the calls and messages. ... (read in full...)
Can I make this work or should I give up?
Q. I'm having relationship troubles. My boyfriend and i have been together two years. We were fine until a few months ago. I bought a house and we started doing it up together. That was stressful. Then my dad got diagnosed with prostate cancer and my ...
A. 30 August 2013: Before you throw in the towel completely, I would suggest couples counselling. Ask yourself, "Can I see myself with this man for the rest of my life?" What is it about him that you like? What is it about the relationship that makes you want to ... (read in full...)
I need both my husband and my lover
Q. So ive been married for 18 years, we have 4 children all teens. Extremely unhappy since 2007. We always had a sort of toxic relationship. Fighting (just words) , making up, great sex..etc. In 2005 he was involved in a business that required alot of ...
A. 27 August 2013: If I were in your position I'd probably do the same thing. I don't blame you one bit. Eyewideopen is right though. It's only a matter of time before you got caught and it won't fare well in court. Have you ever thought about becoming totally ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriends behavior with 16 year-olds daughter friend appropriate?
Q. Hi Everyone, Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I am a 35 year old women in a relationship with a 38 year old man. We have a good relationship and have been together for about 7 months. Recently, I was at his daughter sweet 16 birthda...
A. 27 August 2013: I'm going to be really blunt here and say that the only thing inappropriate was you smoking with the 16 year old girls. Your bf was probably being sarcastic when he said, "That's cool". Other than that, I'd say you were over-reacting.... (read in full...)
I think my partner is selfish and unfair. How do I get him to see things from my point of view?
Q. Dear Cupids, I am so lost and unsure of things and need advice. I am 34 a mother of 2 teenangers, my daughter lives with me and my partner and my son lives 6 hours away with his dad. His dad and I get along for the best part. The problem is I ...
A. 26 August 2013: I agree with anonymous. I'd also like to add that it seems that you know deep down that the relationship is coming to an end. However, you're waiting for the last straw to break the camel's back so to speak, in order for you to end it. Listen to ... (read in full...)
I have a girlfriend and a friend with benefits. What am I going to do?
Q. I think I'm in love with 2 girls. I have a girlfriend but lately I've been getting close with a friend of mines. Myself and my friend are what you could call friends with benefits. She doesn't know that i have a girlfriend though, and I'm starting ...
A. 23 August 2013: If you're trying to find sympathy for your dilemma, you're not going to get it. You are deceiving these two women. There is no integrity in what you are doing, and it really gives insight into your poor character. All I can say is that eventually ... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend has sexual photos/videos of me that I'm afraid he'll use. How do I get him to move on?
Q. I broke up for good with my ex in February. We had a rocky 6 year long relationship. There was a lot of chemistry between us, but there were also trust issues. It all began with him finding out about my past. He reacted so badly that I feared being ...
A. 22 August 2013: I had an ex who kept contacting me even though I told him I never wanted to hear from him again. I blocked him on e-mail, and ignored his texts. It took him two years to finally get the message. If you're able to block him on your e-mail, phone, ... (read in full...)
I once let a guy film us having sex, which he then showed to his friends. I'm dating someone new and I'm not sure whether I should tell him about this incident.
Q. Once in my past, I let a guy that I trusted briefly film us having sex. He then showed it to a few of his friends, and for some reason I didn't stop him. I told him no, that I didn't want him to, but he did anyways and I just didn't know what to do ...
A. 22 August 2013: We all make mistakes. I think you need to forgive yourself. Yes it was something silly to do, but you're not the first to do something like this and you won't be the last. You need to come to a point where you can look back on this incident and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is working abroad and I'm unemployed and struggling with a toddler and another on the way
Q. I'm 23, I have a 3 year old and am currently 23 weeks pregnant. I've been with my boyfriend 5 years and he is abroad finishing a job and will be home in November. Me and my son have just come back home to live with my parents and to look for a house ...
A. 21 August 2013: Your boyfriend owes you child support and he also owes you half of that $800. If he refuses to pay child support, then you need to find a lawyer (try legal aid, if you can't afford one), and file a suit against him. He's coming back in November so ... (read in full...)
My roommate says that I smell but I don't know whether she is being mean or honest
Q. My roommate and I hate each other and she says I have an odor problem when I’m doing what I know is right hygiene-wise. I’m at my wits end. We’re in the military. We live in a 3-man room. She says that “my smell” infects the entire room. I h...
A. 21 August 2013: Ignore her. I think she's being mean. She's using what the two old room mates said and using it against you. Your other room mate does not have a problem with you, so that's evidence right there that she's just trying to cut into your ... (read in full...)
He says he can't marry me because of his parents but we are intimate. Should I stop this?
Q. Well I don't know from where do I start. I'm in a very difficult condition to be understood by anyone. My story has started one year back when I kissed him for the first time. It's not that I haven't kissed any guy before him but with him something ...
A. 21 August 2013: You need to leave. I speak from experience. Your heart will be shattered when he eventually leaves you to marry someone else. He's not going to change his mind. He has already told you that he does not intend to marry you.
I don't want you... (read in full...)
If a girl at work or serving at a shop that I frequent tells me "I am so bored", would you think that is a signal of interest?
Q. If a girl at work or serving at a shop that I frequent tells me "I am so bored", would you think that is a signal of interest? I have had one or two telling me they are bored, and we should get together, to take away the boredom. I realise the la...
A. 21 August 2013: I think you should seize the opportunity and ask her out:)... (read in full...)
Did the fortune tellers mess with my mind or do I truly want to change careers?
Q. Hi guys,you've always given me great advice on love so now I need some career advice. Before I start, I want to say that I have some form of ocd called pure o, where I over analyze thoughts to the point where I have become mentally ill and anxious. ...
A. 21 August 2013: I think you're analyzing things too much again. Close your eyes, meditate, relax, be still, quiet your racing thoughts, and think about what makes you happy and fulfilled in life? Is it something creative? Is it teaching? If it is teaching what ... (read in full...)
Why do some people have so much more pain than others?
Q. Wondering what are the major causes of distracted , painful lives? I feel, I have unquestionably more pain im my life than others. I now, pain cant be measured, but I know, my challenges are only happening to low number of people. Like losing a ...
A. 20 August 2013: I think everybody's pain is a personal experience. I think we all have pain. Some of us just know how to conceal it better than others. I think it is a misconception that someone has more pain than others ("Walk a mile in another man's shoes" ... (read in full...)
I have feelings for a man who is out of my reach, how can I get over him?
Q. I have feelings for a man but he is out of my reach. I know we can't be together as he is just starting his career as a doctor and I am much younger than him. He will be leaving to another city to continue his residency in seven months and I ...
A. 20 August 2013: You are infatuated with him. I don't think this is love, but infatuation still brings pain, especially if the feelings are not reciprocated. I think you should be brave and ask to keep in touch with him. Give him your e-mail and phone number and ... (read in full...)
My curvy LDR gets advice from her friends to lose weight. I like her just the way she is. Should she listen to her friends or me?
Q. I have been in LDR with an American girl for two years. We met once in South East Asia and spent two weeks together. I'm 32 and she is 34. She is curvy and always asks me whether, "should I lose weight or not?" Also, if she loses weight, he...
A. 19 August 2013: I think it is sweet of you to find her beautiful as she is. We live in a society with so much pressure to be a certain size / weight, etc. I think that you thinking that she is perfect as is, will help her with her body image issues. Continue to ... (read in full...)
To apologise for the way I treated her I helped pay for their wedding, but I realize that I love her
Q. This is long and I apologize. But I put myself into this ordeal and I want to know how to get out. I met this great woman when we were 16. We dated the summer after sophomore year (10th grade) but I regret to say that I blew her off most of the ...
A. 14 August 2013: You should love her unconditionally and let her go. She'll never forget your kindness and generosity. She is happy. If you try to mess things up now, you'll make her sad and confused again. Is that what you want? Let her go with love. If you ... (read in full...)
My fiance doesn't help out around the house.
Q. I've been with my fiancé for a couple years now, I really love him and love the time we spend together. My issue is he doesn't help out around the house. What do I say to get him to help out more without starting an argument or make him feel like ...
A. 14 August 2013: When you need help, ask him directly to help you. Hinting won't help. Communicate directly with him..."Honey, I could really use your help me with...Do you mind?" Ask him nicely, and if he can help you he will.... (read in full...)
The weirdest date I've been on. I still can't figure out what happened?
Q. The weirdest date ever, what does it mean? I met this guy in Miami, we had some kissing and some sort of almost sex in a car. He was out of town. We kept writing to each other very infrequently on FB. 2 years forward, I have a business trip an...
A. 14 August 2013: Maybe he's gay.... (read in full...)
I can't afford sleepless nights because my flat mate won't get help for his problems!
Q. I have a flatmate (or roommate) who is essentially slowly but surely loosing the plot. I've been living in my flat for around 5 months? I'd been flat hunting for around a month at this time it got offered to me and it seemed cool (piano, record ...
A. 14 August 2013: Some kind of intervention is necessary. One of my friends is bipolar and once in a while he stops taking his medication. What we've had to do was call the police and the paramedics. The police are there to ensure that he is not a danger to ... (read in full...)
Was he right to compare my body to a woman in a porn movie
Q. I've been dieting and lost 12 lbs thus far. I was doing this mainly to lose some tummy fat that settled as I have grown a little older. This seems to be the hardest area for me to lose it. My boyfriend, we are talking about marriage, and ha...
A. 12 August 2013: Does your boyfriend have a great body to match the male actor in the movie, or is he as well endowed? Next time you watch porn together do a comparison and see how he likes it.... (read in full...)
Forget Someone You Love (the quickest way)
Q. My inspiration for writing this article are those people whom I have given advise from here on how to stand up after they split up with their partners. I can't help but feel sorry for them, for I sincerely understand how hard it is to heal a bro...
A. 11 August 2013: I love this article. You have some really great suggestions:)... (read in full...)
Stretch marks make me very self-conscious
Q. I got LOTS of strech marks (arms/legs/back) when i was 14 years old. I wasn't thin but wouldn't call myself fat. I think it was perhaps growing too fast and maybe not realising i was putting on a little too much weight. The thing is, for all my ...
A. 11 August 2013: I got stretch marks as a teenager too. I used to stress about it and rub pure cocoa butter on it, but nothing seemed to work, except time...yep! Mine faded with time. They don't stay on your skin forever, unless new ones pop up. I also read ... (read in full...)
We dated for 4 years, broke up and now 3 months later he's getting married! Why didn't he marry me?
Q. Hurt and angry about that my ex is about to marry his new girlfriend! Ex and I dated for 4 years. We had talked about marriage-it was a bit of a rocky relationship. He broke up with me, and less than two weeks later, he is already with someone new...
A. 11 August 2013: I am so sorry this happened to you. The same thing happened to me a few months ago. I was devastated! But I'm in a much better place now. I just wanted to add to the already great advice given here, and tell you that it gets better. You'll soon ... (read in full...)
I overheard someone make a rather unpleasant remark about my appearance and now my confidence is at an all time low!
Q. Hello there. I just need a bit of help guess. The other day I was walking on the train and I walked past this boy with his girlfriend and I heard him make a rather unpleasant remark about my appearance. Now I know I’m not anything special, but I’ve ...
A. 10 August 2013: I went through my teens and young adulthood feeling exactly how you are feeling. I was overweight, had pimples, and was called some really ugly names. I blossomed as I got older. I'm now in my 40s and I look better than I ever have. My class ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting or do I expect too much from my bf?
Q. For my bday my boyfriend (29 years old) got me Chanel No.5 perfume (kind of strange to me as I was turning 24 and I know this is a much more "mature" perfume). The problem isn't so much with my preference though, my problem is more with how he went ...
A. 10 August 2013: You sound like a high maintenance chick to me. You did not even appreciate the effort he put into cooking you a big breakfast last year. Chanel No. 5 is a classic perfume, and it's not cheap either. It seems like the sincerity behind the act of ... (read in full...)
Are his texts just jokey or could he be interested in me?
Q. I am in my 40s and have got a male friend who I have known for 8 years. We get on very well bantering and he is very witty and funny. Occasionally when I send him texts he will reply with a double entendre, it depends what it relates to. The ...
A. 10 August 2013: LOL...He is cheeky:))) I don't think men and women can truly just be friends. All of my male friends (single and married) have flirted with me one time or another in a similar fashion...testing the boundaries I think to see how I respond and what ... (read in full...)
My wife doesn't want to tell me that I am not her best lover. Why does she lie?
Q. I met my wife when she was 40 (now she is 46). She told me that, among almost 30 previous sex partners, I am her best lover. I can not believe her. My penis is only 5 inches and normal thickness. I am not bad in bed, but I know I am not the best. ...
A. 10 August 2013: She is not lying. She loves you. She's in love with you. When love is involved, nothing else compares.... (read in full...)
He's been seeing a male prostitute for friendship?
Q. I'm 36, and my husband's 40, we have a 15-year-old daughter. He admitted last night that he'd been going to a male prostitutes to "talk" and have a few beers, and even gave me his mobile number! My husband also said no sex was involved and tha...
A. 10 August 2013: Like most of the people who commented here, I would be very concerned about this unusual friendship.
What is your gut instinct telling you? Listen to your gut.... (read in full...)
Has anyone had an ex that has reached out after realizing he made a "mistake" and wanted to work things out?
Q. It has been 2 months since my ex boyfriend and I have had "no contact". He broke things off. I miss him so much I haven't reached out at all, no calls, no texts, or emails, nothing. I keep wishing he'll miss me and realize he wants me back. I am ...
A. 9 August 2013: I had an ex that contacted me after 10 years. He had cheated on me and dumped me for someone else. He had been through many relationships and realized that no other woman could give him the love that I did. I listened to him with compassion, but ... (read in full...)
Why did he let me go if I was so good for him?
Q. I posted a few days ago in regards to my boyfriend not sure if he saw me in his future. I'm 23, and he is as well. He told me he wasn't sure he saw me completely and he was completely confused. The day before yesterday, he came over to talk. ...
A. 8 August 2013: I went through a major break-up about 10 months ago, and I agree with the poster that said TIME is a healer. First I was numb and in shock. Then I had my daily crying fits. Then I tried the rebound relationship route. I was a complete mess. ... (read in full...)
Where can I find a younger woman, evolved intellectually, who isn't interested in procreating?
Q. I'm in my mid fifties, look 10 years younger, am mistaken for being in my thirties on occasion. I find younger women attractive, but I'm afraid to respond to their overtures for fear of rejection when they find out that I'm much older than they ...
A. 8 August 2013: Why not find a woman you are compatible with? Forget about age. There are plenty of older women who look much younger. If you are attracted to someone, do you ask them how old they are or do you try to get to know her first?
I'm in my 40s and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants more pictures of my friends topless in return for theme park tickets
Q. My boyfriend last summer had a bet that if I could get a friend to flash me he would pay for a ticket to the theme park close to us. Well I pulled it off I got a friend to text me a picture of her topless and success I win! Well he took it a bit...
A. 6 August 2013: I agree with Kenny. This guy sounds like a loser. You're too worthy and too beautiful for this guy. Find someone else who is more worthy of your love and adoration. Buy your own ticket and tell him to go take a photo of his junk so that you can ... (read in full...)
I don't want to be the "good enough for now girl" and be wasting my time!
Q. I'm 23, and my boyfriend is as well. We have been together for two years, and do not live together. Recently, I've been beginning to feel like our relationship is kind of at a stand still, like my boyfriend keeps putting the breaks on. He's a good ...
A. 6 August 2013: I agree with the anonymous female...from my own experience, when a man is ready to settle down (get married), it usually happens within the first few months of getting to know each other. However, it does not guarantee that the marriage will last. ... (read in full...)
I can't find the spark I had with my ex!
Q. Right if you could please help, about 3 yrs ago now I split up with an ex. We were together for four years.. it ended a lot because I had drawn myself away from her and didn't spend time with her.. basically I always thought it would end as I felt ...
A. 6 August 2013: When you were with your ex, things did not work out. Now you are alone three years later and no relationship seems to be working out, so you're now idealizing your ex as the perfect girl (when she was not). I think it's all an internal defense ... (read in full...)
Your Ex Is Sending Mixed Signals
Q. Many of us may be in recovery from a recent breakup, or you are several weeks into the no-contact period. You broke up months or years ago. There is this dull pain in the pit of your heart. You're going about your life. You relapse and cry ...
A. 3 August 2013: Wow! You are bang on with your descrpitions and analysis. This article brings a lot of healing. Thank you for writing it.... (read in full...)
What can a guy do to sexually attract a woman?
Q. What can a guy do to SEXUALLY attract a woman, be it a friend, girlfriend or spouse? I mean what can he do to get a sexual spark in her, to get her mind thinking or wanting, even subconsciously, to do something sexual with him? It's easy for ...
A. 3 August 2013: Have a good dress sense. Find the style that you feel most comfortable in (no sweat pants please), and smell good. Scent is so important. Whenever I walk by a man who has on great smelling cologne, I always give him a second glance.... (read in full...)
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