Should I keep my weird sexual fantasy to myself?
Q. I have a really wierd sexual fantasy and I'm pretty sure any guy who ever heard it would run a mile! So should I just keep it to myself unless someone who I judge to be open minded enough comes along? If you're thinking what could be so wierd I ha...
A. 11 July 2010: Uncommon, but not super rare. I wouldn't suggest saying it on a first date, but when a guy's close to you, when you're in a serious relationship, and as long as you don't start by making demands, you should be able to share your thoughts with him.... (read in full...)
He's AMAZING in bed but I need to make it clear that I'm not looking for a relationship . . . How should I do tha
Q. A few days ago I asked out one of my co-worker work-study students out to lunch. It went great, he was a real gentleman, and I liked that. He invited me over to his place last night to watch a movie...you can guess where that went, lol. Before that, ...
A. 11 July 2010: Honesty, up front, before you get back to either of your homes even one more time. Clear, straight forward honesty before you touch each other again. If you BOTH agree to go on with a FWB in secret, then that's your choice as adults. ... (read in full...)
I'm just "not in the mood" very often!
Q. I have been married for eight year.I have three kids.For the last two year I have been having Problems with my husband.I simple don't feel like having sex very often.Maybe four to five times a month.My husband is a wonderful man and he means the ...
A. 11 July 2010: Four to five times a month? Gah... I should be so lucky! But libido waxes and wanes. It won't always be wild. But talk to him, be open, honest, and don't accuse or blame. Just talk and be willing to compromise. He gets less sex than he wants, maybe ... (read in full...)
She keeps requesting me as a friend on Facebook, and I keep denying her, but she's persisting! What is she thinking?
Q. Alright to make this short and quick as possible, my ex dragged me on with her for 6months. I basically waited for her. I decided to move on and so I'm like alright imma just delete her off facebook and I did this was like a week ago, and like a ...
A. 11 July 2010: Block her.... (read in full...)
Would like a little sage advice on giving to notch blowjobs??
Q. Any tips on giving an amazing blowjob?...
A. 11 July 2010: Enthusiasm. The more he feels that you WANT to be doing it, the more he can enjoy it. Eye contact, or smiles when your mouth is free, or even just reassuring him that you aren't just doing this because you feel you have to. The sexiest thing a woman ... (read in full...)
Does wearing tight boxer shorts lower a man's sperm count??
Q. I heard that when a guy wears tight boxers it lowers there sprem count is that true? Thanks....
A. 11 July 2010: Tight underwear, generally briefs, keep his parts too close to his body, thus keeping his parts too warm and lowering sperm count somewhat. It's only a temporary change, but yes it does have an effect. ... (read in full...)
Is there an approximate timeline for relationships?
Q. Hi, thank you for taking the time to read my question. I have been dating this guy for about 1.5 months and we started out really fast. I'm kind of scared because I feel like we're going too fast and even though he says he'll wait until I'm ready, ...
A. 11 July 2010: Six weeks between beginning dating and a first fully clothed dry humping is fine... if anything it's slow by the standards I've seen for high school and college aged couples. As with anything sexual though, what matters is that YOU are comfortable. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for males to like this stimulation?
Q. Hi! :) .. I have a really very strange question to ask.. Yesterday morning my bf and I were having sex, the first time in 2 weeks that we have had proper intercourse. Although the strangest thing happened about a year ago he bought me a vibrator, ...
A. 5 July 2010: Perfectly normal. Perhaps not as common as some things men like, but many straight men in healthy relationships like the feeling.... (read in full...)
Are we destined to have bad relationships depending on how we were raised?
Q. Dear cupid, I've been wondering this for a while now and maybe it's true maybe it's not but I have watched it happen to alot of people, heard famous songs about it, even watched it in movies and those movie ideas had to of come from someone....
A. 13 April 2010: Yeah, I've seen that happen a lot, actually. Abused children abuse their families, daughters become like their mothers, etc. Heck, even from my own experiences with a single mother and a deadbeat dad, I wound up putting women on pedestals and ... (read in full...)
Were not exclusively dating so is it cheating to go on other dates?
Q. I have been dating a guy for about two months. We've known each other since last summer and just talked on and off. We have made out and acted as a couple out in public. But still have not had sex or talked about being exclusive. We text pretty much ...
A. 13 April 2010: If you two are not exclusive, and if you've not declared yourselves to be officially dating, then no you're not cheating. But you may be hurting him if he's under the impression that this is going somewhere with you. Honestly, you may be due for a ... (read in full...)
Is 'text only' considered cheating?
Q. is online sex consider as cheating on your husband if its done by only txt chating and no pictures and cam is used, no personal information is shared also ?...
A. 13 April 2010: Depends on the couple. Some people feel it's not cheating if you don't touch, but let me ask you two questions: Would YOU be happy if your HUSBAND were texting sexy things and getting off on thoughts of some other WOMAN? And are you being honest ... (read in full...)
What do men think of make up?
Q. Hey, just wondering what people's opinions are of make up in general? As a girl, I know that make up is important to a lot of women when it comes to their appearance but I'm not so sure when men think of it. Answers from all, male and female, ...
A. 13 April 2010: A little makeup, just to cover an occasional blemish, is ok. I won't find a girl unattractive just for the occasional imperfection, but if she wants to cover it, fine. But the more natural she looks (either by not wearing any or by wearing very ... (read in full...)
She's talking to other men online...
Q. I caught my gf back on a dating website communicating with a guy living in the same city as us. I told her to stop using the website because I feel uncomfortable about her using it (who wouldn't?). The sad thing is that I sacrificed a lot...
A. 7 April 2010: She signed up for a dating site, has been talking to men, and now will be meeting a man? There's a word for that. It's called "dating"
I know you love her, but she has to pick: you, or dating other men. If she won't give up other boyfrien... (read in full...)
Is she the one for me? Or is she too young?
Q. i am a 32 years old guy in a relationship with a 25years old girl. She is someone i truly love and have made it known to her that i intend to marry her. Truly i mean this. But my problem is the age - difference between us. At one point i feel she is ...
A. 7 April 2010: That's no problem, really. People twice as far apart make it work. If she's alright with it and you can be alright about it, then it's perfectly fine. And think about this, in ten years you'll be 42 and 35. That doesn't seem so bad now, does it?... (read in full...)
Do men only want women in their 20's?
Q. Do men only want women in their 20's? What happens when you get to 30, 40 or even 50? What happens then? Will all the guys be busy chasing all the hot young 20 year olds and ignore the older women? So guys- who do you prefer?Women your own age...
A. 7 April 2010: I'm 26 and oddly, most of the women I've been attracted to lately have been in their late 30s or early 40s because they're charming, confident, strong and mature in a way that these 20 year old flakes just aren't. I look forward to being in my 30s ... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but want to try something with the new guy I met!
Q. Hey:) Ok i have a boyfriend of 4 yrs and were both 21 yrs old. Lately we havent spend any time together and i feel lonely and need some attention and he is not really making a effort. So a few days ago i met this guy and we had alot fun togethet and ...
A. 6 April 2010: You want to give your virginity to this other guy without your boyfriend knowing about it? Just know that this will almost certainly end your current relationship. No only would you be cheating, but you'd be giving your first sexual experience to ... (read in full...)
How can I kiss her? She's almost a foot shorter than I am!
Q. I need to know the best way to kiss a girl who is almost a foot shorter than me because I really love this girl but I cant figure out how to kiss her because I dont want to bend at the knees cause that just ssems like it would be rude to do and i ...
A. 6 April 2010: I'm 6'2" and my ex was 5'1" and we made it work. I just bent down (at the neck and shoulders, mostly) and she looked up and would occasionally go onto her toes. Barring that, sometimes I simply put my arms around her and half picked her up. Kissing ... (read in full...)
Use Him And Lose HIm
Q. Ive been friends w/ this guy for a while, he asked me out and i said yes. He really gets on my nerves sometimes and i kinda want to break up with him, but I also really want to have sex with him haha. My friends say "use him and lose him" It sounds ...
A. 6 April 2010: I'm with TasteofIndia here. Talk to the guy. If you BOTH want to just be friends with benefits, then that's one thing. But if he's expecting something more from you, don't just use him and then leave him with a broken heart. That's cruel.... (read in full...)
Did I lose my virginity to myself?
Q. Hey all, i have a question... i got really horning last ngith and started masturbating. i couldnt get enoguh, so i used a tool to help me feel good. im a virgin, and i started bleeding. could this be because of the tool i used, or my thing breakin...
A. 6 April 2010: You're still a virgin. And please, don't feel disgusted. You're a normal girl exploring herself. If you get to know your body, enjoy some solo time (even with a tool), you will be better able to explore and enjoy sex when you finally DO give your ... (read in full...)
How old is too old to be a virgin?
Q. Hello, Just a quick question: how old is too old to be a virgin? I am 24 but still have not met the right man to become intimate with. I am not in a rush but I would like to know how old is too old? 25? 40? ...
A. 5 April 2010: I'm 26 and counting and still a virgin. Heck, I was engaged to a girl, but still didn't go there (and good thing too, but that's a long story). I'm still waiting for the right person.
There is no maximum age. Just don't throw it away on a quickie ... (read in full...)
Extreme pda problem
Q. So my boyfriend and i have been dating for about 4 months now and we are completely happy, to be honest the best relationship ive had. There is just one thing, lately he has been hanging with me and my friends alot, which i love, but he is a huge ...
A. 4 April 2010: He's a horny young guy who's being reckless, as men tend to be. And by your own admission, you say it's a "huge turn on" so he's probably sensing that you like it. If you want him to calm down some, you have to TELL him to calm down, otherwise he's ... (read in full...)
I'm Christian but I want to have sex.
Q. Hi. I'm 17 years old and im horny a lot. I masturbate once a day right before i go to bed. sometimes twice a day. I have never kissed a girl, gone out with a girl or had sex. :(...I am a Christian so i want to keep my purity until marriage but i ...
A. 4 April 2010: I have to say I'm entirely disappointed. Since when does DearCupid turn on people that are trying to control themselves by encouraging them to go sleep around? When people say they're trying to hold onto their virginity, they are supported. But if ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is leaving me over my penis size!
Q. pls,am not happy with my small penis,pls my people help me,my girl friend is about to leave because of this,please i need your help,help me out?...
A. 4 April 2010: If this is literally the only reason she's leaving you, JUST because you are small, then she's not worth keeping. Any girl that determines your value as a man based on the size of your penis doesn't deserve you. But if this is just one of several ... (read in full...)
I made a HUGE mistake last night!!!
Q. I made a HUGE mistake last night. In a moment of passion (during sexual foreplay) I asked my GF a hypothetical question of "If I wasn't in your life, and you had to be with one of our/your friends/acquaintances, who would it be? The problem is...
A. 4 April 2010: Perfect answer, Tisha. I tend to think I'm pretty understanding with women, but I think I learned something here. Well no, that's a lie. I learned a lot here.... (read in full...)
Why do men only want fun?
Q. Why do men just want fun?? - Is there anyway to go further or are they all just destined to only want fun? - Why is it only when they want fun? - why do they want to catch up but never make time available?...
A. 2 April 2010: Not ALL men, just the ones you've been with. I am, and many of the men I know are, more interested in a long term, committed, mature, mutually compromising, emotionally grounded, intellectually connected, faith based relationship with a wise, funny, ... (read in full...)
Are there any faithful men out there?
Q. Hey everyone! I was wondering ....Is there such a thing as a faithful man? Even after so many years? No offence guys just got myself out of a bad and long relationship and I am worried/scared : / What are your experiences? Thank you ...
A. 2 April 2010: As a man who was faithful to one cold-fish girlfriend, only to move on (when I found her cheating) to another woman that left me high, dry, and sexless for three years (until she cheated on me too), I still never once cheated. Even though I wasn't ... (read in full...)
Do girls just not search for guys online unless they are really desperate?
Q. Something doesn't make sense to me. I can't figure it out. My friends were joking about signing up for the online dating site plentyoffish. Anyways, I signed up for it with a fake picture and just looked at and read a lot of the profiles of the ...
A. 2 April 2010: If you're a man, dating sites are 100% useless. I've tried several, even eHarmony, and every one is a waste of time and money, like you said. 10 women and 200 men. The only chance is to go out and try to meet people at parties, friends of friends, ... (read in full...)
Is it possible for a woman to fake virginity when she marries?
Q. I just want to know if it is possible for a girl to hide her premarital sexual relations form her husband (she's been having regular sexual relations with other males for 5 years before marriage). She is going to marry after 6 months ...
A. 2 April 2010: Sure you CAN hide it, but some day he's going to find out that it was a lie and it will ruin his trust in anything you've ever told him. It's better to start your marriage out truthfully than to spend the rest of your life lying and hoping he never ... (read in full...)
Friend gave me head while I was asleep.....
Q. I was at a party with my GF and we slept on the couch of a female friend that was hosting the party. I was on one end sort of sitting back and my GF was laying in the opposite direction. Well the problem is I wake up at about 6:30 am and look...
A. 30 March 2010: That's horrible, and yes I would feel violated and raped there too. But there's nothing you can really do except tell your girlfriend. There's a chance she really slept through it, the friend won't tell anyone, and you could keep this a secret ... (read in full...)
How big a deal IS sex and fidelity in a marriage?
Q. Hi, I am a 24 year old married girl. I got married 2 years ago. I dont have any kids and my husband is away for the past year. I want to know how big a deal is sex. I love my husband, but i do not think that I should only have sex with him. I occa...
A. 30 March 2010: My own personal beliefs on the value of sex in a marriage notwithstanding, you're being dishonest here. While there ARE some open marriages that can work, this isn't an open marriage that you're in. This is just adultery. If you truly feel it's no ... (read in full...)
Isn't it up to the man to ask the woman out to dinner?
Q. I met a man online and had a date last night. I almost cancelled, because I thought I would not like him. Anyway, we met up and laughed all night. We talked and talked, held hands amd it was a blast. He walked me to my car and kissed me goodnight.. ...
A. 29 March 2010: If you like things in the traditional, old fashioned way then yes, men ask women out, pay for dinner, open doors, pull out chairs, do all the driving, make all the plans, etc. and women stay home with kids, clean the house, can never wear pants ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is falling for me way too fast after losing his virginity
Q. Hello everyone, well this is my problem. I been with my boyfriend for about 3 months going on 4 and I'm his first everything. In the beginning I knew he was falling for me and he was falling fast. But now that I took his virginity I know that he i...
A. 29 March 2010: You just posted a question about wanting him to move faster for you:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-can-i-get-my-boyfriend-to-give.html
On the one hand, you are pushing him into speeding things up. You took his virginity, and now you want... (read in full...)
Do boys never make passes at girls wearing glasses?
Q. What do guys think of girls who wear glasses?I wear them and I seem to get a lot of attention but I was just wondering...
A. 28 March 2010: I'm not sure how common this is, but I rather like girls in glasses. It depends on the girl (some look better without), but for the most part I think they add a little something. I was saddened that my ex preferred her contacts.... (read in full...)
How can I get my boyfriend to give me oral sex?
Q. Heyy everyone i really need help! ]= okay so i been with my boyfriend for about 3 months and he was a virgin while he was with me until yesterday when he gave it up to me. but he wasnt my first and he knows that we'll anyways i love oral sex!! ...
A. 27 March 2010: Be patient with him, be gentle, give him some time, and don't nag him about it. The more you pressure him into it, the more you're going to make him defensive and hesitant. You already knew he was a virgin and he's already given this to you, so he ... (read in full...)
Am I being old fashioned? Is sex is necessary when it comes to relationship?
Q. i had a bf,a very first bf. he asked for sex.when i refused immediately he cursed me and said i'm boring and old fashion. i talked to my friend.they said it's my fault for reject his offer. she said it's normal to have sex when they're in relat...
A. 27 March 2010: You're not being boring. You're being mature. It's not only rude and childish of him to insult you for refusing him, but it show's a basic lack of respect for you as a person.
You have sex when YOU want to, when YOU'RE ready, NEVER just because ... (read in full...)
Will an std harm my unborn child?
Q. i been together with my boyfriend for about 6 months ...i love him with all my heart ...he was my first and the only guy i been with ... like 2 weeks ago i went to the doctor and got a check up...she called me yesterday and told me i tested posi...
A. 27 March 2010: It depends on which STD you have. If you're already talking to your doctor about this, please ask about the risk to your baby, the best steps to reduce that risk, proper care for your own health, and how you can prevent spreading the STD in the ... (read in full...)
Made a mistake losing my virginity -- will a guy who wants someone pure ever love me?
Q. Well i am a 17 year old girl who made the mistake of losing her virginity to someone she isnt going to spend her life with.I regret it and now i dont know how my future husband will take it and have fear he wont love me the same way as if i were a ...
A. 26 March 2010: I can't vouch for all men, but here's who I am: I am 26, a virgin who's done some things (up to third base) but kept that last act and will keep it until marriage. But I do not expect a virginal bride. I am a virgin for MYSELF. I am keeping it for ... (read in full...)
How many partners has he had?
Q. Readers, I have this fascination with each boyfriend i have ever had, to ask about past relationships. with my latest bf i asked him numerous times how many women he has slept with. each time answered is a different number sometimes less and some...
A. 25 March 2010: Drop the subject altogether. If he's being evasive either thanks to poor memory or deliberate attempts to hide the truth, then there's no answer he can give you that you'll like hearing.... (read in full...)
How do I cope with getting so wet?!
Q. [Moderators Note - Op's own title] Ok, my problem is this, my vagina gets extremely wet when kissing and even before intercourse. When my boyfriend kisses me, my panties will be completely soaked and sometimes it seeps through to my skirt or my tr...
A. 23 March 2010: That's highly flattering to a guy, and yes it's a turn on for many men. But if it's uncomfortable for you, please see your doctor to see if there's something safe you can do. There's nothing wrong with it though. Some girls are dry, some are wet, ... (read in full...)
Does it make me less girly that people think of me as a 'horndog'?
Q. Hey :) ok well usually when i and i think most people hear the word horndog they think of a guy. Well im a girl and iv been called that before and i dont take ofence to it or any thing plus we were having a good time. I was just wondering why do ...
A. 22 March 2010: If you're thought of as highly conservative, that will excite some and turn off others. If you're hyperactive, that will excite some and turn off others. And yes, if you're a horndog, that will excite some and turn off others. It's just another type ... (read in full...)
Do all boys just want sex?
Q. soo i really want to know do boys really all just want sex? becouse when i even get close to a boy they ask for sex and so this horrible pick up lines and they say stuff like "but your just soo hot i recken you would be amazing in bed" and its like...
A. 22 March 2010: No. Not all men are just looking for sex. At 15, it will seem like it, but it's not the case. As a guy that's been in a few serious relationships, even an engagement, without giving up his virginity, I stand as proof of that.
Just stay strong, ... (read in full...)
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