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I stumbled across this website. I am not sure how to be honest, but I am here now. I am still living life and if what I have lived through can help others I may be inclined to offer my two pennies.
I am an American Expat living in Europe. I would like to think of myself as a rational free thinker or Pearlist (Physical Evidence and Reasoned Logic) and happen not believe in any form of a god/goddess. I hope I can help and do good for this community as it seems a very good outlet for people.
HonningKanin |
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My girlfriend and I are 14, we want to have a baby, any opinions?
Q. Me and my girlfriend are deeply in love and want to have a baby. Were 14...
A. 27 October 2009: Yeah, bad idea. I am 24 and I am still not ready to have a baby. At 14 you are still in school, still alot to see and learn. A baby will stop you from doing alot of things you wish to do. You will always be financially strapped to the little one and ... (read in full...)
I went off sex so allowed my sister to have sex with my husband, but now I don't see why they should continue this arrangement!
Q. Dear Cupid, I gave birth about a year ago. For the first few months after, I was not up for sex at all (although I did allow him to perform oral sex on me). My husband was very patient with me, but I could tell he was stressed by this. I didn...
A. 26 October 2009: YOu have every right to pull the plug. He is your husband and you are his wife. You allowed for them to sleep together when you were not physically or mentally up for it. You need to explain to them that that was the reason you allowed for it and ... (read in full...)
Sex hater.
Q. I am 20 years old and have been with my bf for 2 years. before we got together i enjoyed sex alot. but now i hate it we start and after a few min i ask if he is almost done. i hate oral sex and i hate for him to touch me. i thought maybe it was him ...
A. 24 October 2009: It does happen that people become asexual. Meaning they dont want sex. I knew this guy who absolutely hated the idea of having sex. It was a disgusting thought to him. He was attracted however to women and just wanted to be with someone but have no ... (read in full...)
Sex hater.
Q. I am 20 years old and have been with my bf for 2 years. before we got together i enjoyed sex alot. but now i hate it we start and after a few min i ask if he is almost done. i hate oral sex and i hate for him to touch me. i thought maybe it was him ...
A. 24 October 2009: I have a question to ask really. Is this desire not to be intimate and touched by your partner also stem out to other people? Are you ok with girls touching you? Children or even parents?
If it is this desire not to be touched by anyone it sound... (read in full...)
My cousin and I are in love!
Q. ok i dont know where or who to turn to! ive done some research online and i kept getting similar questions on this sight! here's my problem....im 23 and my cousin is 28 we are very close we talk about everything....infact we even told each other how ...
A. 24 October 2009: Ok. Third cousin means this is one of your grandparent's great grandparent's, great great grand child. I would say this is sufficiantly and genetically removed from you. Some states even allow for first cousins to become married. You two are grown ... (read in full...)
I was sexually abused by a family member, how do I tell my family?
Q. I'm 20 years old and from the age of 5 until i was 11 i was sexually abused by a family member. I want to tell my family but i have no idea how to. I'm scared, i don't want them to hate me. This will ruin my family but i need to get it out. It w...
A. 23 October 2009: About 20 years old is about the same time my half-sisters told my mother they were abused by their cousin. My mother never blamed them or hated them, but it did help them to move on with their lives. You did not put your family in this situation, ... (read in full...)
As I leave for work, the only words he has for me: "Are you wearing a dress to make it easier for him?"
Q. I love dresses, I have always loved dresses. My boyfriend of two years, speaks about marriage with me and how he loves me and wants to spend the rest of our lives together. I love him dearly but there are things about him that don't seem...
A. 23 October 2009: I draw the line at his compulsive need to know where I am. He doesn't. I am my own person and you need to trust me or this wont work. If I allowed him to continue with his behaviour, the more i allow it to happen to me. I only receive what I put up ... (read in full...)
Are my boyfriend's reactions to the abuse he suffered normal?
Q. hi please can anyone tell me if my bf`s behaviour is normal? hes lied so much im startin to wonder what to think. i met him in 07 when he was 34. he told me that between the ages of 12 to 15 he had been sexually abused by his stepfather. the abuse ...
A. 23 October 2009: Have you ever heard of stockholm syndrome? Its a psychological response to mainly people held against their will or in a situation where one person is dominant and the other submissive. Essentially the victim becomes emotionally attached to the ... (read in full...)
I want someone to adopt my baby!
Q. hello,am new here and i will just want to find out certain things,am 8 months 3 days pregnant and i have being having this thinking in my head for some time now,it has being a hard decision to make but i think am reay for this now,i will want to ...
A. 23 October 2009: Marriedlady you can take offence to anything I say. I dont overtly care as it is an abortion of responsibility. The word abort means to fail, cease, or stop at an early or premature stage. The oposite word of abort being adopt, as someone adopts the ... (read in full...)
I want someone to adopt my baby!
Q. hello,am new here and i will just want to find out certain things,am 8 months 3 days pregnant and i have being having this thinking in my head for some time now,it has being a hard decision to make but i think am reay for this now,i will want to ...
A. 23 October 2009: There are cartainly many websites which can help you locate your nearest (or furtherst) adoption center where you can fill in the proper paper work to leave your child with them. They will more than likely try and convince you to keep the child. ... (read in full...)
I don't want to control him but I don't like him looking at pornography!
Q. Hello there, I have a horrible feeling that I can't get rid of. It's probably quite common but I need to get over it. My boyfriend always said he didn't look at porn and wasn't interested in other women, just me, which i knew sounded too good...
A. 23 October 2009: You ask the question "I know its acceptable for guys to watch porn by why is it?" The answer is its not if you dont want or accept it. I personally have no issue with my husband looking at porn because I watch porn as well. I also dont have issues... (read in full...)
Aries male crazy over a Saggittarius girl. Need Help!
Q. Classic Aries male in his 30's and I have a professional relationship with a classic Saggittarius female who's been driving me crazy. This girl could possibly be put on earth to be my soulmate. I love everything about her. Now the problem is two ...
A. 23 October 2009: .... Ok. Ignoring the zodiac psudoscience. Your post is something more down to earth like this - "I am a 30 year old professional man who in a relationship who is attracted to another woman who I think is the one for me. Any advice from peop... (read in full...)
What if she chooses smoking over me?
Q. hey i have a problem with my girlfriend she used to smoke before we hooked up and quit when we became official because she knows that i wouldnt be with someone that smokes for reasons i told her. we are going to a party this Saturday and she said ...
A. 23 October 2009: I can sympathise with your situation. I myself have always looked for partners who didn't indulge in smoking as I too could not stand to watch the person I loved slowly poison themselves. I think the biggest underlying factor was because my fathe... (read in full...)
Ok to cheat on him to get pregnant and then tell him its his?
Q. I have been with my bf for 2 years and love him to def! Now... we have been trying to have a baby the last 6 months with no success. I know it is not ME with any issues because I have had 2 pregnancies before and got pregnant RIGHT away. I ...
A. 23 October 2009: Just to let you know, jerking off increases sperm count. Someone who does it quite a bit is forcing his testicles to produce more sperm than someone who doesn't.
The chain smoking might lower it. It also might not have any effect at all.
... (read in full...)
Is oral sex as bad as I imagine?
Q. What does oral sex feel and taste like? Previously, I fingered a girl and smelt my finger after and it was horrible so I havnt even tried to use my mouth. Can anyone give me advice on what to do? thanks to everyone that hel...
A. 20 October 2009: This is difficult because there are so many factors that need to be taken account of.
Hygiene.
Which is important. A dirty person is no fun to lick, male or female.
Diet.
This believe it or not can change the mucus in the vagina and seman ... (read in full...)
Food-a-phobic?
Q. i hate food. i eat the same food daily. my diet is based around plain pasta and im pretty sure that is unhealthy, i have no sorce of dairy in my diet atall. i curently go to a dietition and have been attending that for about 1 month and made lit...
A. 14 October 2009: Well this is a big problem. Food is what keeps you alive and a balance one keeps you healthy.
There was a show not too long ago in the Uk that aired with a girl who had just this sort of problem. She didn't like eating anything other mashed p... (read in full...)
Is it possible to get pregnant a week after your period?
Q. Hi! I have a question for all you women I try searching for the answers to my question and couldn't find anything that was helpful enough. Hope yall can help me. I would greatly appreciated....ok so the week after my menstrual period I had sex with ...
A. 14 October 2009: Yep. You very well can get pregnant. Here is how menstruation works. An avarage female has a 28 ovulation cycle. The day of the cycle starts on the first day of your period until you have another bleed. On day 14 your body releases an egg which ... (read in full...)
I feel there is something wrong but I have no proof! Am I stupid?
Q. i am married for 7 years and i have 1 child. its been some years now that i accidentally saw a message sent by him to his unamarried colleague 'kisses everywhere'. we had a fight over this and he told me that nothing is happening. it was just a ...
A. 14 October 2009: Ok I have read your post and this is the break down of what is happening here. You are jealous, you have become obsessed and you have made it perpetually worse for yourself by constantly scrutinising the things he does without realising why he did ... (read in full...)
My wife likes to pleasure herself, is this normal? I only thought it was men that played with themselves!
Q. hi we have been married for over 25 years and there is very little my wife and i have not done in the bedroom department. we both enjoy sex and are healthy. recently my wife is more into self please of herself, its something she as done for ma...
A. 12 October 2009: Short answer, Yes. Totally normal.
Enjoy,
HonningKanin... (read in full...)
I am in love with my ex-teacher in highschool, what do I do?
Q. I am in love with someone which is possibly a huge plus. A problem with this love is its for my ex teacher from high school. I am now in college and have known him for three years. He has no clue, but i think he sees us as friends or at least more ...
A. 12 October 2009: You are no longer his student. There is nothing illegal about this and he is not likely to lose his job seeing as there is no teacher student conflict.
It would be different if you were still a student under him and some people may view this as ... (read in full...)
How can I get my family to believe me?
Q. I was the bad girl and very promiscious from the tender age 12. By high school, it was very well-known by everyone that I slept around frequently and had a thing of going after other women's men, especially the married ones. By the end of my ...
A. 12 October 2009: This is a pickle you have found yourself in that sounds like a sketch from a horrible comedy. The problem here is that they are seeing smoke and where there is smoke there is usually fire. Unfortunately this happens to just be insense.
I dont thi... (read in full...)
What are the chances she is pregnant?
Q. Alright, so my girlfriend and I last had sex 6 days ago.(We're both 14, by the way, but please don't answer my question like you're talking to a little kid who has to be told about abstinence)After I ejaculated into my condom, I took off the condom ...
A. 11 October 2009: Welcome to the world of adults Nick. If you cant handle the consequences of playing the game then dont step into the ring until you can.
Even as a full grown woman pregnancy is a very dangerous time for both mother and the unborn. Complica... (read in full...)
I'm 14, have had one abortion with complications, and I think I may be preganant again!
Q. Well im 14 yrs old and will be 15 February 3rd. I am in a relationship going on a year january 3rd and had an abortion september 1st. For my follow up ii was told that there was a blood clot left in my stomach ! ii believe they got it out but the ...
A. 11 October 2009: There is a possibility that you could still be pregnant. However, there is a possibility that you could be not pregnant and just going through the pregnancy symptoms. Even though an abortion removes the fetus from the womb and stops the pregnancy, ... (read in full...)
Could I have harmed my baby?
Q. okay so i have just found out i am 11 weeks pregnant - do you think my alcohol intake would have effected my pregnancy 3 weeks ago i had - 1 Litre of cider 2 weeks ago i had - 2 litres this week end all together 6 glasses of cider ...
A. 11 October 2009: Drinking chronically and in LARGE amounts early on in the pregnancy is what really effects the gestation and development of the baby. Small quantities of alcohol pose very little threat though it is highly discouraged do to the fact that all fetuses ... (read in full...)
Why am I angry at my friend's passing?
Q. this will be my last time. i need couple more questions answered. my best friend, no my brother, who i grew up with. who was with me since i was 6, died yesterday. he wasnt a blood relative or related to my family in any way but he was my brother, ...
A. 11 October 2009: My sympathies and compassion go out to you. Anger is a very very common and neccessary part of the grieving process. Especially after a suicide. Suicide is one of those things that leaves just pure confusion and so many questions that simply wont ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant but my husband wants me to abort the baby!
Q. I am 38,my husband 46, we both has a daughter from previous marriage, 15 and 13. Now I am pregnant, but my husband does not want the baby. He wants me to do abortion. what I should do? He even wants to divorce! Help!...
A. 11 October 2009: By him saying you will look for him for the child support, you should really tell him of course you will. It is the least he can do. Seeing as he is happily foirfeting all other aspects.
Congratualtions on becoming a mother again. Seeing as you w... (read in full...)
What are the chances she is pregnant?
Q. Alright, so my girlfriend and I last had sex 6 days ago.(We're both 14, by the way, but please don't answer my question like you're talking to a little kid who has to be told about abstinence)After I ejaculated into my condom, I took off the condom ...
A. 10 October 2009: And just on another point, its not a SMALL chance she COULD be pregnant by these actions, but a VERY HIGH CHANCE.
Small chance would have been if you had sex with the condom and stopped there. Remember it only takes 1 little sperm to make her preg... (read in full...)
What are the chances she is pregnant?
Q. Alright, so my girlfriend and I last had sex 6 days ago.(We're both 14, by the way, but please don't answer my question like you're talking to a little kid who has to be told about abstinence)After I ejaculated into my condom, I took off the condom ...
A. 10 October 2009: The fact of the matter is you did not wash yourself after taking the condom off, meaning your penis was covered in sperm when you placed it inside her. This means you pretty much let the little buggers, though not as many, loose inside her. She can ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant but my husband wants me to abort the baby!
Q. I am 38,my husband 46, we both has a daughter from previous marriage, 15 and 13. Now I am pregnant, but my husband does not want the baby. He wants me to do abortion. what I should do? He even wants to divorce! Help!...
A. 10 October 2009: The decision is purely yours to make my dear. You need to weight out your options and make practical decisions as i am sure you are.
You need to take into account
1.support - who will help you raise this child as I am sure your husband will... (read in full...)
Is it common to feel guilt after masterbating?
Q. I have been masterbating for a very long time, i do it evry other day. I was getting really worried because I thought I was the only one in the world who did it. After i do it i get a huge feeling of guilt and shame but it dosn't stop me doing it ...
A. 10 October 2009: You know I have been masterbating since I was about 3 years old, from what I can remember and according to my mother there were instances where she caught me at it as young as 2. She actually took me to the doctors for fear I was being molested. The ... (read in full...)
When can I take a pregnancy test?
Q. Hi. So, here is my situation: my boyfriend and I had unprotected sex (stupid, yes) the day after my period ended. Ten days later, even though I know it is unlikely that we conceived, I feel weird. PMS-like symptoms, nausea/hunger, everything smells ...
A. 10 October 2009: I find that my breast swell 2 cups sizes about 2 weeks before I get a period. Normally you should wait atleast 4 weeks to get a decent and more reliable result from the take home pregnancy tests. However if you cant wait the 2.5- 3 weeks to see if ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant but my husband wants me to abort the baby!
Q. I am 38,my husband 46, we both has a daughter from previous marriage, 15 and 13. Now I am pregnant, but my husband does not want the baby. He wants me to do abortion. what I should do? He even wants to divorce! Help!...
A. 10 October 2009: Empty -1, we aren't dealing with the reverse. Her situation is her husband holding the "do it or I will divorce you" card. That is a selfish on a purely different level as well as controling. I am bashing him because he is being an asshat to her.... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant but my husband wants me to abort the baby!
Q. I am 38,my husband 46, we both has a daughter from previous marriage, 15 and 13. Now I am pregnant, but my husband does not want the baby. He wants me to do abortion. what I should do? He even wants to divorce! Help!...
A. 9 October 2009: Wow. He is a bit of a selfish prick. You can tell him that his threats of divorce are silly, childish and an asinine attempt at emotionally trying to control the situation. Inform him that it takes two people to create a baby and even if you do have ... (read in full...)
In my dream I had sex with my sister!
Q. I am really really freakedout by a dream I had last night. It was so vivid it seemed real. And the sick part of my dream is that I knew what I was doing and with who and I didn't stop! I feel creepy this morning. I gotta find out what this dream ...
A. 9 October 2009: I have said it once and I will say it again till the end of time. dreams are just dreams and they usually never mean a damn thing. Your brain is an amazing tool that allows you to come up with and imagine an infinite amount of situation, whether ... (read in full...)
He bled during sex, what does it mean?
Q. I had sex with a guy who is uncircumsised,and he started bleeding from his penis inside me... I am scared to death! Why did that happen? What does it mean? What should I do?...
A. 9 October 2009: Ok. Where exactly was the blood coming from? If it was coming from his urethra he may very well have an STD or worse case scenerio, a type of cancer. Either way both of you should get tested and he needs to go to the doctors fast.
If it wasn't f... (read in full...)
How can I get the courage to buy condoms?
Q. Hi everybody i'm 19 now and i had sex 5 times till now with 3 different girls although i never tried to force any girl but being very much attractive i have few girlfrnds but do not date with them but every boy knows we can't deny if a girl proposes ...
A. 9 October 2009: Genital wart.
You can get that from oral, anal and sex. Get condoms.
Herpes
You can get them from oral and sex. Get condoms.
AIDS
You can get them from oral, anal and sex. Need I say the obvious?
HonningKanin... (read in full...)
Am I an alien?
Q. im 18 years old. i have been sexually active for about two years now, and i have had three partners. when i masterbate, i always make myself cum. and when i recieve oral sex, i always cum. but i have yet to get an orgasm thru intercourse. the other ...
A. 9 October 2009: You are not an alien and you are actually very very normal. ALOT of women lack a G spot. ALOT of women cannot climax by penatration alone. This is either because the muscles where the G spot normally is is too thick, not where it should be, or ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him I lied about my dad dying?
Q. I’m in a real dilemma. I met this guy about 4 years ago. He thought he met the love of his life. Me, I was just coasting. I’d just been dumped from a long term relationship (six years). My head was all over the place. He always bent over backwards ...
A. 9 October 2009: Firstly, I would give him every last cent you owed him. I wouldn't say anything to him, I wouldn't try and chit chat and I would sit him down. I would ask him to listen to what you are about to tell him and if he gets up and never wants to talk to ... (read in full...)
How do I fix this? Help!
Q. dear cupid, My best friend and i turned romantic after being close for about a year and everything was great but i was terribly mean to him and i had no idea why. he wanted things to go faster than i did and i guess i was scared. we started ...
A. 8 October 2009: Unfortunately you really poisoned the well. You verbally and possibly mentally abused him and yes you pushed him away. You may have to come to terms that this is the result of your actions and you should learn from this. You may, in time and with ... (read in full...)
The way he acts around girls I find to be too much
Q. Ok so I've had this boyfriend for 2 years. We broke up on 2 occasions throughout this time, 1x cuz he wanted "a break" but then went out with someone else n lied to me about it. I decided things deserve a second chance so we went back out. We ...
A. 8 October 2009: You know he probably figures he can get away with this because he may feel he has you wrapped round his little finger and in actuality he probably does.
You get what you allow to happen really. This is his personality, you know what he is like and... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for a woman to ask a man out?
Q. I have another question, is it wrong for woman to ask man out on a date? Does it start a cycle of a woman taking the male role in the relationship?...
A. 8 October 2009: No its not wrong. I actually find it more common now for women to innitiate the dating.... (read in full...)
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