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*lskitten agony aunt

*lskitten

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*lskitten's profile:

37yr old mum of 2 living in the Uk. Happily single. Too busy to date at the moment but tend to go out & socialise in the neighbourhood pub a stones throw from my house every saturday night.

xxxxxx

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I let my brother go into foster care, is he behaving nastily because I didn't take him in?

Q.   my brother (who's 9) was in a crash car and both my parents died but he is a survivor. Child services call me asking if I want take him in or he'll be in foster care. I didn't want to take him in because my girlfriend (of 2 years) just move in with ...

A.   6 November 2008: You keep asking if all these things are to do with you, but you dont seem to be taking steps to help him out. Some of it is to do with you (i'm not going to sugar coat it) and some is to do with the fact he's lost his mum and dad who were also his ... (read in full...)

Why won't my ex leave me alone and move on?

Q.   I dated my ex for about a little over 3 months. It's been well over a year since we dated. A lot of things went wrong, as he was manipulative, emotionally damaging, and incredibly selfish. Drama went on after I broke up with him. He continued to ...

A.   5 November 2008: You can finish with him, and you have. That will be infuriating for him. I also feel sorry for his new one. Ive got an ex like yours and I finished with him numerous times only for him to manipulate back again. I got the nice guy swinging to nasty ... (read in full...)

Do you think it is possible for someone to stop fancying someone?

Q.   Do you think it is possible for someone to stop fancying someone? I have a guy mate who said he fancied me so much in the past but now he is scared to tempt our friendship.. he says he loves me too much. he has been sending me a lot of mixed me...

A.   4 November 2008: Yes its possible to stop fancying someone. I quite fancied a guy a few months back, went over his for coffee, have a few beers with him out, was doing the dreaming about what it could be like to date, but we didn't get into anything, once I got to ... (read in full...)

Will he come back to me and love me, or is this the end?

Q.   We have been together for 2 years and 3 months, I have three children from a previous (Divorce), but he loves the girls like they are his own. He has said all along that he dosn't want children of his own. Things had been going great, then he came...

A.   4 November 2008: I agree with the anon poster. Only him and time will tell that. But what a nightmare. I feel for you. There isn't actually anything you can do about it either, apart from wait to see what he's going to do. Its unusal for a guy to move into a mate... (read in full...)

Why won't my ex leave me alone and move on?

Q.   I dated my ex for about a little over 3 months. It's been well over a year since we dated. A lot of things went wrong, as he was manipulative, emotionally damaging, and incredibly selfish. Drama went on after I broke up with him. He continued to ...

A.   4 November 2008: Because he is a manipulator. All the being nice, getting no response so turning nasty, is a classic pattern with a controller. He hasn't changed and your instincts are right to stay away from him. Its a shame most others dont have the same qual... (read in full...)

Should I text his girlfriend and tell her what he said?

Q.   Ok, I was dumped back in the summer by my ex who I loved to bits for another girl. At first, I was so bitter that I would email her telling her stuff about him, bad stuff like his worst habits and things like that. I wanted her to see him as a ...

A.   4 November 2008: If you're not bitter anymore then leave it be. If he is as bad as you say, he will dig his own grave wont he. Thats just common sense. If she really likes him and he treats her bad, then thats her problem. He has probably said to you that she will... (read in full...)

I let my brother go into foster care, is he behaving nastily because I didn't take him in?

Q.   my brother (who's 9) was in a crash car and both my parents died but he is a survivor. Child services call me asking if I want take him in or he'll be in foster care. I didn't want to take him in because my girlfriend (of 2 years) just move in with ...

A.   3 November 2008: My bro is 11 yrs younger than me, and if my mum had died when he was 9, I would of taken him in no matter what. Blood is thicker than water. What if it doesn't work out long term with this girlfriend (you're young, its stacked against you) but your ... (read in full...)

I am in a long distance and age difference relationship. I found out he is cheating ...

Q.   I am in a long distance and age difference relationship. My boyfriend is from italy he is 27 and had to return because he overstayed his visa. he left in Febuary and i was able to visit for 2 weeks in august so now we are waiting for his new ...

A.   2 November 2008: Are you really that age? I'm 37 and even I can see this guy is a user. Am I the only one? Of course he's chatting up other women, he is 27. And wants a visa. C xxxxxx... (read in full...)

Does he really have to spend so much time with his kids and exwife ?

Q.   I have a problem with my boyfriend spending time with his exwife when seeing his children. I don't care how much time he spends with his children. He is lucky to be able to see them at least 3 times a week. Today he went trick or treating with ...

A.   1 November 2008: My ex stays and chats for ages when he comes to pick my two up. So I dont throw in burgers but is that really relivant? I think its nice he went trick or treating with them. My ex has the kids every other weekend without fail, but any extras like ... (read in full...)

If she loves me shouldnt she want to live with me?

Q.   I love my gf and she tells me that she loves me more than anything in the world but whenever I mention us living together she is not intersted. when we are together we have a great time, i can feel the love from her and we feel like we are in o...

A.   31 October 2008: How long have you been dating and how old is your girlfriend? There are many reasons people dont move in together, work, family, location. Could be lots of reasons. I dont see how anyone can comment with very little info. C xxxxxx... (read in full...)

What could these symptoms be?

Q.   i am so young but i have memory loss problems.when i try to focus on one thing i lose so much focus on sumthing else n it feels like im retarted.or it feels like im lazy when it comes to thinking.is it a stage?i can't really remember what happened ...

A.   31 October 2008: Only a doctor could say hun C xxxx... (read in full...)

Bumps on my tonque and in back of my throat. Do I have oral herpes?

Q.   i think i have oral herpes but i have never had any outbreaks at all. but i have a small bump on my tongue that has been there for a week and i think another one is developing. i also had some bumps in the back of my throat that was hurting but it ...

A.   31 October 2008: Smiles is right. Could be anything, Thrush, bacterial infection? Only a doctor could say and give you antibiotics if needed. C xxxxx... (read in full...)

"He doesn't want to cut in on his grass"

Q.   I was chatting to a guy at work today and he used a phrase, "he doesn't want to cut in on his grass" when we were chatting about another guy I work with. Has anyone heard this before and if so what does it mean....

A.   30 October 2008: Never heard of it. Why didn't you ask him? C xxxx... (read in full...)

I'm a married woman, but can't stop e-mailing my online man.

Q.   I am a married woman now for 17 years with three kids. Recently I met this married man online. We have talked now for like three months straight. Only of course when he's at work. I sit and wait for his emails day in and day out. Someday we talk all ...

A.   30 October 2008: Are you working? Is it that you need something else in your life? I expect a lot of us have clicked with someone on line at some point. I used to get on great with a married guy some years ago. There was a big time attraction. He lived about 2 hours ... (read in full...)

I'm afaid if I leave and take the kids and let him see them he won't give them back to me.

Q.   I want to leave my husband! I can't live like this any more and I told him today. He didn't really care that I was leaving but said I'm not taking the kids they're both 6. I'm afaid if I leave and take the kids and let him see them he won't give ...

A.   30 October 2008: In the Uk responsibility is more often than not awarded to the mum. Unless unfit can be proved. Thats just the way it is. But really its him that should be leaving. The children should be staying in their home and the parent bringing them up full ... (read in full...)

Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??!

Q.   Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??! Theyre so nice when they want sumthing then they discard you like a piece of rubbish. They can be the best boyfriend ever but wont think twice about dumping you for another woman and ...

A.   29 October 2008: lol fade, I went on there years ago. I thought it was just a chat site full of commitment phobes that prefer internet relaionships to real life ones. Maybe we are too fussy! C xxxxx... (read in full...)

I am a lady who is dating two man at a same time. The problem is I don't know which one to choose.

Q.   I am a lady who is dating two man at a same time. the problem is i dont know which one to choose. course the other guy i have been dating him for five years and this present one its only been seven months please help confuss ...

A.   29 October 2008: Icelordess is right. Which one treats you better etc. Lucky you having the choice of 2!!! Hope they both know about the other though! C xxxxx... (read in full...)

Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??!

Q.   Why are all men selfish, disrespectful, ignorant bastards??! Theyre so nice when they want sumthing then they discard you like a piece of rubbish. They can be the best boyfriend ever but wont think twice about dumping you for another woman and ...

A.   29 October 2008: lol eyeswideopen, thats good. I would say you are going for the wrong type of guys. Not being big headed, merely saying it because its relivant to the question, but ive never dated a 'traditionally' good looking guy. I always go for blokes with sim... (read in full...)

I'm pregnant and have noticed my husband still keeps in contact with ex girlfriends!

Q.   I noticed on the computer and on the phone that my husband is still keeping in contact with some of his ex-friends this topic always starts bad emotions between us plus I'm pregnant, should I just let it go and start talking to some of my ...

A.   28 October 2008: If your exes are such good friends, then yes you should still maintain contact. But not just because your guy does with his exes but because they are friends and you want to. I am friends with a couple of my exes and if I date someone, they will... (read in full...)

I think she doesn't love him but is after his money!

Q.   hiya today ive had my ex bf on the phone crying his eyes out basically the woman he left me for is treating him like crap,she says she doesnt trust him and that she loves him but not sure if its in a friendship way or a gf/bf way, i really feel for ...

A.   28 October 2008: I had an ex that ended up with a nightmare of a woman. She was 33, 10 yrs older than him, but treated him horrendously. He would ask adbice but still take her back numerous times. I stopped getting involved in the end. I dont think there is anyt... (read in full...)

My girlfriend is starting to ask my help in paying her bills

Q.   I have a girlfriend who i love very much and she says she loves me, she works nights in people care and exhausts herself doing it to pay her mortgage and bills and the money is not going far enough so shes started asking me for money to make up the ...

A.   28 October 2008: Maybe i'm cold hearted but if you're not living together, why the hell is she asking you to give her money? I wouldn't be happy about that either I dont blame you. You have your own bills, you pay them, you dont go expecting her to fork out for you.... (read in full...)

How can I overcome getting low when I don't hear from him?

Q.   I'm in love with a man who has a partner but says he will keep in touch with me ( we have just become good friends and I am happy as that)! - He rings on occasion - when he can get away - but on nights he doesn't I start to really panic that I ...

A.   27 October 2008: And even cry if you need to happy24birthday? What kind of life do people put up with. It baffles me. Its like wallowing in self pity. Why choose to be miserable unless you enjoy it? TasteofIndia hit the nail on the head. How about losing the dead ... (read in full...)

How can I overcome getting low when I don't hear from him?

Q.   I'm in love with a man who has a partner but says he will keep in touch with me ( we have just become good friends and I am happy as that)! - He rings on occasion - when he can get away - but on nights he doesn't I start to really panic that I ...

A.   27 October 2008: How can you overcome this? With an attached guy you cant! Accept thats how it goes with 3's a crowd relationships. Or find someone that has you as number 1 as oppose to his main partner. C xxxx... (read in full...)

Do men mean it when they say "I love you"?

Q.   While we were laying in bed the other night, he told me he had something he wanted to tell me. I got nervous and thought it was something bad, but it wasn't he said I love you. And I believe he meant it because men don't say the three words if they ...

A.   27 October 2008: lol @ men dont say they love you unless they mean it! lol @ women dont say they love you unless they mean it too! The world is full of people that say they love you for many reasons including, meaning it, thinking they mean it, and wanting to get i... (read in full...)

I've to meet my ex as he badly needs a blowjob! Is he serious???

Q.   Hiya, I've just got off the phone to my ex boyfriend, he dumped me to go back to his ex, anyway cut a long story short they're not together yet but spending all their spare time together as basically she doesn't trust him, he cheated on her (not ...

A.   27 October 2008: It sounds like the ex is the only one being slightly sensible here by refusing sex until he has proved he can be trusted again. Which obviously he's not. So it doesn't look like he's getting any fun there anytime soon! And he knows that, which is ... (read in full...)

How do I find that one-night-stand again ? I want to get to know him better.

Q.   Hi, I have a question on how far it is ok to go to find someone you met only once before but really would like to know better? The story is this: I met a guy in a club a few weeks ago and we spend the night together. I wasn’t thinking I wo...

A.   26 October 2008: If he wanted to see you again, he would of left you his number. One nighters are just that. One night. You could have loads of those if you choose to. Thats part of what night clubs are about at times. Didn't you know that? Ive had a one nighterlike ... (read in full...)

Baby mama problems...

Q.   I met my boyfriend in August 2006, we dated and then broke up. He has a total of 4 kids. 3 of them with his ex wife and 1 with another woman. I have met all the kids. Well we recently got back together in June 2008 and now BOTH women have told him ...

A.   26 October 2008: You cant do anything. If my kids dad kept splitting with someone then getting back with them, I wouldn't want them being involved in that either. Its too unsettling. I'm sure there is more to this story than you have put here. Nothing wrong with... (read in full...)

Confusion over an ex!

Q.   Everytime I talk to my ex on the phone he talks about us. I talk about us he acts cold. He left me for making him really jealous but he doesn't know till now that I knew all along even though he didn't want his ex back, he was sneaking around ...

A.   26 October 2008: Didn't want his ex back but was sneaking around behind your back? How much do you wanna bet he ends up back with her? I had a boyfriend like this, couldn't stand his ex, reakons it was over about a yr before he finally left her, failed to mention he ... (read in full...)

What is the best form of contraceptive?

Q.   What is the best form of contraceptive?...

A.   26 October 2008: In what way do you man? Best form of contraceptive is absinance! Failing that they are all much of a muchness in terms of reliability? C xxxxx... (read in full...)

Should my man be spending Christmas with his ex (for the sake of his kids)?

Q.   Hi guys - I'd be very grateful for your advice on something that's bothering me, but I'll just set the scene first. I have been with my boyfriend for a year. I'm 30 and he's 40. We don't live together yet, but we spend about 3 nights a week to...

A.   25 October 2008: I think you have to accept that its normal with guys that have kids. They miss their kids like mad when they split from the ex. You said you will be spending it with your family anyway? Why can you do that but not him? Control issue going on here ... (read in full...)

Should I trust men in general?

Q.   Hi I'm 30 and have had a few long term relationships, including the one i'm in now. I have NEVER been able to trust a man and assume they are all lying/devious about everything, would cheat if they got half a chance and can not be trusted or...

A.   24 October 2008: I think the guy you have now could be a gem, but the way you assume they are all lying, has him hiding things from you. Just because its an easier life for him. If you trusted him, he wouldn't of chosen lying as his first option. Its almost like ... (read in full...)

We fight, we break up, but somehow keep ending back together again! Why do we have this pattern?

Q.   Hello I have been in and out of a relationship with someone for over four years now. we fight and then we breakup and sometimes its a really bad breakup and then months go by and we will get back together. this has happened so many times now i...

A.   23 October 2008: I believe that ceratin people bring out the worst in someone. Ive had 2 agrgumentative relationships, but more non argumentative ones. I think clash of personalities causes it. And I also think you could need the reassurance that you're still wanted ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend and I don't argue, is this healthy?

Q.   this is a bit of a random one , normally in relationships, i get easily wound up if the guy does something wrong, like if im meant to pick him up when hes drunk and isnt there, i would go mad, and other stupid things that drunken guys do , but w...

A.   23 October 2008: To be honest, my kids dads sister used to think we were a tad weird because we didn't argue. Her and her hubby did. And they are still together, yet we split 7 yrs ago. Hope that doesn't put you off! lol Seriously though, thats not why we split, so ... (read in full...)

Men and games!

Q.   I Have been dating this guy for a few months and recently I have been living with him. He told me from the start that he wasn't emotionally ready for any commitment, but he told me I may find my way to his heart.......... ...

A.   22 October 2008: You moved in with someone when they said they dont want a commitment? How did that happen then? I'm confuddled.. C xxxxx... (read in full...)

I'd love to have him back in my life again...

Q.   My partner has moved out our home 3 months ago after 5 years together. At the moment he is living with his parents. He says he needs time and space and I know it is no point to make him stay or beg him. I said I understand and agree to let him go, ...

A.   22 October 2008: Hard to say. We're not in your relationship. But it sounds like your guy wants out, feels guilty, and thats why he still comes round. He's also used to being with you, so is struggling to make the adjustment to not being there. The habit thin... (read in full...)

Meds for sex...

Q.   Please suggest some medicine by which any lady gets horny and ready for sex?...

A.   22 October 2008: The best medicine is to be a nice genuine guy. Not someone that needs to use Rohypnol. Psycho.... (read in full...)

How common is it for a woman to be able to orgasm through penetration alone?

Q.   Just a quick survey: I have heard that about 80% of women can’t orgasm through penetrative intercourse alone. I have been with one girl who could and one who couldn’t. So in my very limited experience it’s about 50/50. What do you thin...

A.   22 October 2008: 30% of women achieve orgasm through penetration alone. C xxxxx... (read in full...)

How can I set up my wife to meet someone else, so I can go on with the one I love?

Q.   I have been seeing another woman for over 20 years. I made a mistake and got married to someone else and I am very unhappy. How can I set up my wife to meet someone else, so I can go on with the one I love....

A.   22 October 2008: Wha???? How do you marry the wrong person 20 yrs ago and still manage to be married to them? What have you been thinking for the last 20 yrs? If you want out, as ive said many times on here, go to the sports shop and purchase a pair of balls, a... (read in full...)

Is it legal and okay for me to move in with him when I'm not 18 yet?

Q.   Hi, I am a girl of 17 in a wonderful relationship with a 27 year old guy. I am planning to leave home, transfer my college and move in with my boyfriend in 2 weeks time. My parent are not so happy with my decision but I have been with him for 6 ...

A.   22 October 2008: In the Uk you can move out of home legally at 16. I did. Many moons ago! C xxxxx... (read in full...)

Is my period just delayed?

Q.   Situation: my boyfriend and I came close to having sex. We weren't sure if any of his semen got near me, so I took the day after pill just to be safe. Problem is that I took this pill on friday (friday was three days before my period) so, come mon...

A.   22 October 2008: You haven't said how soon after the incident you took the Levonelle? If it was within 3 days, you shouldn't need to worry. But apart from the cost, a pregnancy test wouldn't do any harm now to put your mind at rest. C xxxxx... (read in full...)

Can you ever REALLY be friends with an ex?

Q.   We were together for about 6 months and I lost my virginity to him. I admit that I still DO have feelings for him, and on some level always WILL since he was my first, but I would really like to be friends and not have him simply disappear out of my ...

A.   22 October 2008: I lost my virginity to a guy when I was nearly 16, ended up marrying him at 18, split when I was 21, divorced when I was 23. Weren't friends for a few yrs after, but now, 16 yrs after divorcing, we get on great and will always be there for each ... (read in full...)

In a polyamourus relationship and my female lover is pregnant!

Q.   I have been part of a Polyamourus relationship for 5 months now, my girlfriend is married to my best friend and I love her very much. Her husband is completely understanding as he has a girlfriend of his own, and we do nothing that he doesn't know ...

A.   22 October 2008: What do they want then? I mean, ive heard of this situation before and the 'boyfriend' moved into the marital home and the fact a baby came along, didn't change anything. But it all depends what she wants now a baby is on the way. Has she not ... (read in full...)

Should a woman text/call, or should she wait until the man contacts her?

Q.   I've been on a couple dates with a guy i really like, and have known him for a month now. We have a great time when we see each other. He has told me he liked me before. I just dont know how long i should wait until i call or text him. I dont want...

A.   22 October 2008: He still hasn't contacted you yet? Did you try txting him? C xxxx... (read in full...)

My boyfriend and I don't argue, is this healthy?

Q.   this is a bit of a random one , normally in relationships, i get easily wound up if the guy does something wrong, like if im meant to pick him up when hes drunk and isnt there, i would go mad, and other stupid things that drunken guys do , but w...

A.   20 October 2008: I dont think theres anything wrong with not arguing. Me and the kids dad didn't argue the whole 9 yrs we were together. Nothing i remember anyway. But my mum always said it took 2 of us to do anything, because we were joined at the hip lol I think ... (read in full...)

Should a woman text/call, or should she wait until the man contacts her?

Q.   I've been on a couple dates with a guy i really like, and have known him for a month now. We have a great time when we see each other. He has told me he liked me before. I just dont know how long i should wait until i call or text him. I dont want...

A.   14 October 2008: Always a dillema, but I wouldn't get too hung up on seeming needy. 3 days is plenty of time to pass since talking. Wont come across as needy if you bung him a txt. Go for it. I dont think guys should have to do all the chasing these days. C xxx... (read in full...)

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