Is this what you would call 'love'?
Q. I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for three years and I love him very much but I do worry that I dont know what love is and so worry that maybe I dont love him.I know its silly and im 23 years old,I feel like I should know better.I ...
A. 31 October 2008: I think sometimes people over complicate the word 'love'. Considering you have been with your bf for 3 years suggests to me that there must be something strong there to make it work that long and to keep you both there, and this could be very well ... (read in full...)
My husband wants to make a sex tape!
Q. My husband (for 3 years) wants us to make a sex tape for his birthday (hes turning 28). We have no kids yet (we're still talking about it). I told him to dream on. I dont want to get out and then everyone will i'm a slut. He promise he'll get a safe ...
A. 31 October 2008: If you arent comfortable making a sex tape, for whatever reason, whether it be fear of someone else seeing, or because you think they are sick and wrong- thats your opinion and you have the right to it. Dont do something you dont feel ok with doing. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is allergic to condoms and our sex life is somewhat confusing to me...
Q. me and my boyfriend dont use condoms but are very careful on what we do. he doesnt use them as he is alleric to the lube on them. the thing is, we could be haveing sex, and all of a sudden he would stop, and then about 30 seconds later, he ...
A. 18 October 2008: My guess is he stops because and withdraws from you because he is about to cum- and the cum is what can get you pregant. However, despite this, there is such a thing as 'pre cum' which comes out from the penis before he actually cums. And this too ... (read in full...)
I am scared of sex!!!!!
Q. I am actually 13 and one of my friends has been having sex (or so she says she does) and I was thinking maybe I should but I'm scared and my parents are overprotective -- not toooo much but I want to, now will I be a virgin forever if I'm scared to ...
A. 18 October 2008: No, you won't be scared of sex forever. Everyone is scared of sex at first. Its the fear of the unknown.
Its not something that is openly talked about, so its sort of like a mystery.
The fact that you are scared, is a huge sign that you are... (read in full...)
Sometimes when we're kissing he has his eyes closed, which is very odd to me.
Q. I've been dating a guy for about four months now and I really care about him a lot. He tells me he loves me and I tell him I love him. He's eleven years older than me but I don't think that really matters. I love him. I do have a concern though. ...
A. 17 October 2008: I thought it was common to kiss with your eyes shut? And "odd" to kiss with your eyes open??
Have you ever been to an eye doctor and had they tell you to keep your eyes open and look straight at them while they have a magnify glass right up to yo... (read in full...)
Why don't guys like me?! Is it my fault?!
Q. i don't know what's wrong with me??? i'm becoming crazy! cuz i can't have a seriuosly relationship with some guy! .. i don't know why??? ... i'm a model in my free time! thus I'm pretty but they don't love me! as i wanna it! .. What should i do??? ...
A. 17 October 2008: Hi,
I know how you feel.
Up until about the age of 18, I never had a bf...infact I never had a guy ask me out or show any interest in me.
I myself too have done some modelling, so it wasnt an issue of being 'too ugly'.
For myself, I think i... (read in full...)
Why would there be a condom wrapper under his bed? We haven't used them in months!
Q. Okay I am seeing a guy, for quite a while now, almost half a year... he doesn't want a relationship, I'm having trouble coping. Either way my question is I found a condom wrapper under his bed, with HIS boxers. We don't use condoms, and I have been ...
A. 17 October 2008: I think your right in being suspicous of him.
The only other reason I can think of why he would have a condom under his bed apart from him possibly cheating, is maybe its a really old one? Some people (especially guys) are messy and have rubb... (read in full...)
I think about my best friend's boyfriend more than I do my partner.
Q. OK THIS IS ALL WIRED I NEED HELP!!! OK so my best friend's boyfriend an I have been having an affair for 5 years now, he's been with her about 7 years, and I been with mine ten years. We both love the sex he tells me he loves it when he's sleeping...
A. 16 October 2008: Do you understand that what you are doing is wrong? Do you understand how it would make your "best friend" and your boyfriend feel??? Do you understand the effects this will have???
Be honest with yourself, why are you doing this? My guess is... (read in full...)
I just want to be happy and have an easy carefree mind and life. Will I ever get over this?
Q. (PREVIOUS QUESTION) I recently posted about a situation where 5 years ago i got drunk and naked and everyone took photos of me and passed it round my home town and they still haunt me today-everyone that i meet gets shown them and while i didn't w...
A. 14 October 2008: I can understand how you are feeling. What you went through was pretty horrible. Having naked photos of yourself shown to everyone you your [small] town...and people are still showing them off years down the track!! Must be so humiliating. ANd what ... (read in full...)
I performed oral sex on a man early Saturday evening and now have a real sore throat, could I have caught an STD?
Q. I briefly performed oral sex on a man early Saturday evening. He didn't cum and there was no precum. Early the next morning I woke up with a sore throat and it has been a bit sore ever since, well not in the day but each night. Could I have caught ...
A. 14 October 2008: I dont think you would have symptoms so soon...but dont take my word on that, im not an expert.
It could be just that you are worried, so you are actually 'creating' the sore throat yourself. I know that when I first started having sex, I was so... (read in full...)
I'm a self proclaimed clingy girlfriend. How do I stop doing all these? How do I make my relationship better? How do I make myself better?
Q. Hey everyone... I am in desperate need of help. I am a self proclaimed "clingy girlfriend." I have been with my man for two years and some, and I have always been that girl who needs to know where he is, who he's with, what he's doing, what time...
A. 14 October 2008: I am wondering how you were before he cheated? Did you act the same or different?
The way I see it is, he broke your trust. He is the one who did something wrong. There is nothing wrong with you. You dont need to 'make yourself better'. You are ... (read in full...)
How do I stop being shy and become more outspoken?
Q. im a very shy person when it comes to being around boys and im usually clueless on conversation to keep them intrested . what could i do to help overcome my shyness and become outspoken ?...
A. 3 October 2008: This is a hard question to answer in only one reply and without knowing more details.
First you need to figure out why you are shy.
Do you feel insecure?
Have you been through some traumatic experience in your childhood or when growing up as a ... (read in full...)
I don't know what to think about these suspicious emails...
Q. I have a problem and would like other peoples views, A bit of background, we went to my wifes sisters 18th birthday party, at around 11.30 on saturday night the party finished, I said to my wife I wasn’t going into town and for her to go and enjoy ...
A. 3 October 2008: Oh my god. I feel so sorry for you! I hate to say it, but she has def cheated on you and it seems like shes planning on continuing contact with this guy!
The fact that this guy was only in his underwear and those emails pretty much proves i... (read in full...)
Do some women prefer to deal with men at arms length?
Q. Good morning. I appreciate that all men are different and that all women are different. Could someone explain to me (in a work related context) why a woman would turn down one guy's approach face-to-face by saying 'let's just be friends' whereas she ...
A. 3 October 2008: I think that she must of found the guy who she turned down face to face less intimidating then the guy she turned down by email/via HR.
Or maybe she had more respect for the guy who she turned down face to face. Maybe she felt she owed that to him,... (read in full...)
My friend is like a clone of me, it's driving me crazy! How do I put a stop to it?
Q. oh my god!my friend is just like a clone of me and i hate that!she wants to do everything i do!dress the same..wants to become friends with all of my friends,she just has a FAKE personality! if she ever has a problem with someone she asks me to fi...
A. 2 October 2008: I know how you feel! I have a friend who copies me non stop. But whats worst is that she not only copies me, but she trys to claim the things she copies as her own ideas!! So everyone in our friendship circle thinks shes so good and original ... (read in full...)
My friend is like a clone of me, it's driving me crazy! How do I put a stop to it?
Q. oh my god!my friend is just like a clone of me and i hate that!she wants to do everything i do!dress the same..wants to become friends with all of my friends,she just has a FAKE personality! if she ever has a problem with someone she asks me to fi...
A. 2 October 2008: I know how you feel! I have a friend who copies me non stop. But whats worst is that she not only copies me, but she trys to claim the things she copies as her own ideas!! So everyone in our friendship circle thinks shes so good and original ... (read in full...)
Should I move in with him? My boyfriend says it's over if I don't....
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. He wants me to move in with him, but my family don't really like him and don't want me to. They say that I'm too young and that they don't think I'm ready. I originally said yes but when I told my Mam she ...
A. 30 September 2008: This doesnt sound good.
So your bf wants you to move in with him right? Why is that? Is it because he wants to commit to you?
If this is the case then I find it very hard to beleive in his commitment to you if he cant threaten to break up wit... (read in full...)
What do younger guys think about FWB?
Q. Hey, just a quick question - what do younger guys think about the whole 'friends with benefits' idea? Recently I broke up with my boyfriend and although I get lonely and miserable, I don't want another committed relationship for a good while. I ...
A. 30 September 2008: Define 'younger'. Are you talking teenage you? Early 20s young? ...
I think there are alot of people out there who just want sex, maybe more so guys then girls. But I think the majority of those who want just sex would go for the one night st... (read in full...)
I'm used to my girlfriend forgiving me after I abuse her, but this time she's fed up. What do I do?
Q. Hi everyone. I've been with this girl for 3 years now. We have a child together. I love her dearly and want to marry her. She does everything for me. She let's me want for nothing. We have the same religious background which is wonderful (first girl ...
A. 19 September 2008: "I wanted to hurt her but i think i went too far"- there is never a time where hurting someone, especially the gf you claim to lvoe is ok. It is NEVER ok. There isnt a point of hurting her at which you 'go to far'- its always 'to far' and wrong.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend did not call me on my birthday-Am I reading too much into the situation?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend did not call me on my birthday. I wouldn't want to say that he "forgot" because that just might not be the case. Me and my boyfriend are in this long-distance relationship, me being in NY and he being in London. I had my birthday ...
A. 17 September 2008: I can understand why you are feeling how you feel.
Id be pretty hurt if I was you to. ithink you have every right to expect a message or phone call from your bf on your birthday.
I can only guess why he hasnt contacted you to say happy birthday... (read in full...)
He has so many pictures of him and this other girl - what should I do?
Q. Hi all, So I've been dating my present boyfriend for almost one year, I'd say maybe just around a month off from it. I'm 19, hes 20. Anyways, I recently stumbled upon pictures of him and this other girl, its not any inappropriate picture, but its ...
A. 9 September 2008: You shouldnt just let it go! You're gut is telling you something, so you should listen to it.
Its really important you deal with this problem, as if yu ignore it, the feelings will probably only get worst and you will start to feel even more ins... (read in full...)
Should I swing?
Q. My boyfriend of 5 years wants us to swing with his friend and his girlfriend. This is something he really seems into and I don't think I could. But should I do it for him? ...
A. 1 September 2008: Relationships do need some compromises in order to work, but this is one I dont think should be done. Changing who you are, your values, beleifs etc and doing something you are clearly not comfortable with is not something you should do just for ... (read in full...)
How do I attract the women I actually fancy?
Q. Hi. Some women I genuinely feel are intimidated by me. Others find me rather personable. Why is this? Guess which ones I fancy (the former!). How do I attract the ones I really fancy, then? Thanks and bye for now! ...
A. 31 August 2008: Do you know what it is they actually find intimidating about you???
If its a behavioural thing you do, such as the way you stand, talk etc then you could look at changing those behaviours to be more assertive. But yeah, this is hard to answer n... (read in full...)
I need major feedback for this job interview I have tomorrow!
Q. Big interview tomorrow ! I need major feedback, please: What are the top things to remember when going into a job interview? Not as an employer, but as a potential employee. ...
A. 28 August 2008: Since you got the interview that means they liked your application, you have the appropiate education and previous work experience etc...so all you have to do now is show them you a friendly person who would be easy to work with, who is presentable ... (read in full...)
How can I stop my boyfriend from assuming things and getting jealous?
Q. Ive known my boyfriend for a very long time now like almost 6 years since i was 12 . I love him a lot. I think if theres a word that means more than love thats how i feel for him its just unexplainable. The problem is he gets jealous and assumes to ...
A. 28 August 2008: Hey hunnie,
What your bf is doing is very wrong.
He sounds like he may be insecure so this is causing him to have the feelings hes having. Has he been cheated on before? Has he had people lie to him alot before?
Whatever the case may be, alt... (read in full...)
Would calling it making love rather than sex be better?
Q. I found your website while surfing the net. I understand that you give advice regarding sexuality. I am in college and my parents have a cabin by a lake. Last summer I spent the break there. My mum also invited a friend. This friend was ...
A. 24 August 2008: You shoudlnt call it 'making love' unless you are both in love and from what you wrote it doesnt sound like you are in love and neither is she. So to call it making love doesnt make sense. So you should call it sex.
You should talk to her about it... (read in full...)
Any stories about losing your virginity??
Q. I'm nearly 17 and haven't had sex yet. I'm not too bothered as I'm waiting for the right person to come along as a lot of people tell me that it's the right thing to do. However, I do get extremely horny and masturbate and watch porn quite a lot, is ...
A. 23 August 2008: Hey,
Now I am the type of person who cries with only a tiny bit of pain but suprisenly i didnt cry when i first had sex. It didnt really hurt at all. In fact, there was no pain, just a weird sort of feeling i guess you could say...its hard to ... (read in full...)
Why do girls "settle" in relationships?
Q. I've never quite understood why some people seem to settle for certain relationships....case in point: one of my best friends is in a relationship in which her bf was caught almost going across the country to meet up with his ex...he didn't t...
A. 21 August 2008: The main reason people settle for less then what they deserve is due to insecurity. They dont see themself as a good enough person to be able to gain or even deserve better.
Other reasons may be that they come from a bad family, or havent h... (read in full...)
He is talking to his "friend" all the time--is she really just a friend?
Q. okay im new to this just needed everybody else point of view.......cuz he thinks im crazy!....... We started dating in high School. Out of nowhere his suppose "best freind" girl freind started feeling something just when i came up. she always w...
A. 21 August 2008: I really do feel for you as this must be such a horrible situation to be in!
I cant say whether or not hes cheating on you (i.e. has had sex, kissed, touched her etc), but I can say, with a fair amount of certanity that he and her are having w... (read in full...)
How can I find a decent guy? Is something wrong with me? Should I shelter myself to avoid being hurt?
Q. is there something wrong with me? i just can't find a decent guy? they all turn out to be such jerks but it starts out so great ... they tell you how much they care and like you and everything else and then they just break your heart everytim...
A. 18 August 2008: One thing I know alot of girls do which is a big mistake is falling for a guy when he claims his undying love for them so early in the relationship. Any guy who becomes attached really quickly is probably not very genuine. He will fall out of love ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me by his ex's name. Would you tolerate it?
Q. Would you tolerate the person in your life,your loved one,to by mistake call you by a ex's name?My fiance was married to a Liezel for thirteen years and my name is Lizel.Is it just because both start wit and L and am I just making too much of ...
A. 15 August 2008: Based on this one incident I dont think you have too much to worry about. If you have been in a relationship with someone for a long time (such as years) and then you break up and start a new relationship, its hard to get out of the habit of saying ... (read in full...)
Can anyone give me a suggestion on a good place to meet guys?
Q. I feel kind of silly asking this, but could anyone give me a suggestion on a good place to meet guys? I don't go to school anymore, and I don't work in an environment in which I'd meet anyone that I'd want to date. Guys in bars and clubs seem t...
A. 15 August 2008: Hmm I think that leaves joining a group of some sort of activity or hobby you like. That way you'll meet someone who you have atleast 1 common interest with. Also, you could ask friends to set you up with any of there friends or bf's friends or any ... (read in full...)
I'm a clingy person and I tend to be obsessive, need advice please?
Q. hi i need serious help. i'm clingy person and i tend to be obsessive. plus i'm a totaly failure at realtionships. this year i have gone through 10 different guys and then i become obsessive then they break up w/ me. i dont no why i'm like tat. i ...
A. 15 August 2008: Hi darling,
I understand your feelings, but as you have recognised sometimes your behaviour can have negative effects on your relationships with guys. So its important to figure outwhat is causing you to have these feelings.
There are two main... (read in full...)
Sex, sex and more sex. Is it a bad thing?
Q. hey. so me and my boyfriend have been dating for mmm six months and well we have sex alot. and i mean alot. but it seems thats all we do when we're alone, we dont just hangout you know. i mean we do sometimes....but it leads to sex. and its like ...
A. 15 August 2008: I think that it is a bad thing if you have sex pretty much every time you 'hang out'. Its important to have a balance in your life and in any relationship you have. Its also important to be able to spend time with each other just talking and so on, ... (read in full...)
My husband went away for a week claiming that he needed some time alone. I have discovered all kinds of things on Facebook from his 18 yo 'friend.' Guess where he went away.
Q. My husband and I have been having some marriage troubles...he went away for a week claiming that he needed some time alone. I have recently gone onto Facebook and he is on there too. I have discovered all these sexy, love, suggestive bumper ...
A. 15 August 2008: It sure is staring you in the face!!
I disagree with your husbands view of what being religous means. If this girl is 'so religous' then why is she sleeping with a guy she isnt married to? I assume they shared a bed as she said sorry for doing stra... (read in full...)
I can't help but feel insecure and inadequate. I keep comparing myself to her.
Q. There's this guy I've known for a long time. We were going to pursue a relationship. The problem is he has a high sex drive and I'm a virgin at 22. He's alot older and he's 28. The fact I'm a virgin - it's a issue to him. I want to take my time and ...
A. 6 August 2008: Darling you are worth SO much more then this guy!!
Seriously, he is being insensitive to your feelings and disrespecting you.
Its ok that you are a virgin. In fact, its not just 'ok', its great! It means you are waiting for the right guy an... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair while my bf is in prison?
Q. The guy im with is locked up and im feeling so lonenly should i sleep with my close friend ? he dosnt come out intill jan 2009 thats A pretty long time ........
A. 6 August 2008: 6 months? Thats not that long. But I guess everyone is different and if you feel thats a long time to go without sex then you should break up with him.
Just becauses hes in jail, it doesnt mean that sleeping with another guy is ok.
If you ... (read in full...)
Please don't make any of the answers "You are too young to be thinking about this", as I'm not going to be participating in the act. I am simply curious.
Q. Okay, let me just stress that NONE OF THESE QUESTIONS ARE THINGS I AM GOING TO DO! Please don't make any of the answers "You are too young to be thinking about this", as I'm not going to be participating in the act. I am simply curious. There are ...
A. 6 August 2008: 1. Yes relationships are about compromising and so on, BUT there are some things in relationships that you SHOULD NOT compromise. This includes your values, beleifs and morals. Also if you are not comfortable with something, you should never agree ... (read in full...)
Was he trying to be in control?
Q. When i was with my ex, if we got into an argument, right after he would want to have sex, and the way he liked it. it felt like he was trying to be in control or something. what do u think?...
A. 6 August 2008: You could be right. If he only wanted to have sex the way he liked it, it could of been all about being in control.
If you wanted to not do something in bed and told him that, would he insist or try to force you into doing it?
If you wanted t... (read in full...)
Is it rude not to respond to a text right away?
Q. I have a question about texting. So I've been chatting/texting this guy i really like for a while now. The thing is...is it rude to not respond right away to a question? Sometimes he ignores it and sometimes he takes a day to response. I ...
A. 1 August 2008: Yes, that is def rude!!!
People who purposly wait a day or even more to repond to a text are playing a power game. They want to be in control and make them self feel needed and wanted badly. They usualy suffer from an inferiority complex.
Let ... (read in full...)
She is a bit of a shy person and supports sex after marriage! I am exactly the opposite!
Q. I am in a confused state of my mind regarding my girlfriend.. We were friends from college but chose different universities in different cities to stay in...so we have always been in a long distance relationship..but v hve been together for 4 years ...
A. 31 July 2008: You can love someone but NOT have sex with them. Just because you are in love, doesnt mean you have to have sex. You need to understand that because thats how your gf feels.
To her, sex is more then love, its about being making love to that one ... (read in full...)
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