Sick of ex's older wife
Q. I have a son who is 6 years old and my ex currently has more custody than I do, I get him every other weekend. My problem is I'm so sick of my ex's wife and really don't want her around my son. For starters she's 46 years old, 10 years older than ...
A. 28 June 2015: Well, look at it from her perspective: She married a man she loves, she accepted his child and she is being pragmatic by making that relationship, including with your son, very successful. I mean, whose fault is it that your relationship wit... (read in full...)
Mismatched libido. I feel she thinks her needs are more important than mine. I need help. What do I do?
Q. My wife won't come on to me! We are the same age and for years we've only had sex once a month. I've always been the first one to initiate sex. If I don't initiate the sex we won't have sex. I've tried waiting patiently, I've tried explaining...
A. 27 June 2015: Whatever I say is not a diagnosis but possible places where you may want to look into. So, the first thing is that vaginal sex maybe not pleasurable and/or penetration painful and she is too shy to say. Some women are dry. But vast number of w... (read in full...)
What is the difference between Friends With Benefits and a Long Distance/ Casual Relationship?
Q. What is the difference between Friends With Benefits and a Long Distance/ Casual Relationship? Call me old fashioned here - but from a woman's point of view - I cannot see how she can get anything from FWB without having some sort of feelings for...
A. 26 June 2015: FWB is a polite language for unpaid prostitution where a guy gets to have unlimited quantity of sex with a woman he absolutely does not care for while the woman offered those services free of charge and, presumably, enjoys the orgasms. The woman in ... (read in full...)
Can't arouse boyfriend fully
Q. We have been dating a year now and have always had sexual problems. First he always kind of laid there and did nothing, he said it was because he didn't want me to feel uncomfortable. Second, he never touched me or initiated anything with me, he ...
A. 26 June 2015: Be sure he doesn't masturbate, no porn and cut down on fantasizing. Get him to work out in the gym. Then try supplements that cause arousal in men: arginine, yohimbine, tribulus terrestris. ... (read in full...)
He's amicably seperated but procrastinates about divorce
Q. I am in desperate need of advice. My boyfriend has been seperated and not living with his wife for five years, they have no kids. We have been dating for 3 and a half years. My boyfriend and his ex are friends and as a child of divorced parents ...
A. 26 June 2015: He is stringing you along and uses any reason not to divorce. Refusal to divorce means that he still hopes to get back with her and would leave you in a heart beat, or perhaps keep you as a side kick, sort of a relief girl.
Don't waste time and... (read in full...)
Should I leave my wife?
Q. Should I leave my wife? I have always trusted her, but because she had gone out one night about 5 years ago and returned home at 4:30 in the morning, I had started to have concerns. That night, I was supposed to pick her up at 11:00. I had cal...
A. 24 June 2015: I think your wife cheated, emotionally for sure and physically probably, and was planning to cheat on you on several additional occasions. You have definitive evidence and her admittance on the emotional cheating so that one is a slam dunk. However, ... (read in full...)
I know it's forbidden, and he has a girlfriend, but I want to confess me feelings for my teacher to my teacher. Should I do this? What should I do?
Q. should I confess to my teacher that I like him Hi,I'm a 15 year old who has a crush on her English teacher from last yr. He's 12 years older than me. He has a girlfriend who also happens to be my teacher. I've been crushing on him for 2 years now ...
A. 21 June 2015: You will be served best in your life and spared lot of legal trouble if you just let this go, keep your crush mute and let the time crush down your crush. In fact, if you are so infatuated with this teacher and presumably you care for him then be ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend says the spark is gone, she wants to see other people then calls me crying wanting to know if I love her. What am I doing wrong?
Q. So I've been in a relationship with my current girlfriend for a little over two years now. Everything started off great until about the one year mark. She started acting differently. She seemed to be unamused, bored, and irritable. Nothi...
A. 20 June 2015: I wish you described some of her behavior towards other people who are close to her, say sister or family with whom she has a very close relationship, and whether she has any tantrums with them as well, because if so, that would be a major clue that ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend obese?
Q. I'm currently dating a 21 year old man who is 6 feet and two inches tall, and weight 123 kilograms. Is he obese? If he is, is there any problem in marrying this person?...
A. 20 June 2015: IDK if your guy is good to marry but based on standard BMI measures he is obese. However, obesity is a relative issue because of the skeletal and muscle frame. For example, many body builders would be considered obese given preponderance of muscle ... (read in full...)
She called me sweetheart. She's really happy that I'm not leaving. Does she like me as more than a friend?
Q. Hi. I am a lesbian and have never had close female friends. My close friends are boys. There is a woman I work with and I can't figure out if she likes me a close friend or if she likes me more than that. Never having had any close female frien...
A. 19 June 2015: This woman is married so whatever flirtation, feelings or romantic implications she may or may not have made means nothing. Even if she likes you "more than a friend" you don't want to be in between two people who have already exchanged marriage ... (read in full...)
I don't think my boyfriend is over his ex, I keep seeing him checking out her FB page
Q. I was wondering of someone could help. I am in love with a great guy and throughout our relationship we have grown together. I have one problem despite what he says I don't think he's over an ex girlfriend who he lived with. He became ill and...
A. 19 June 2015: Gawking at his Ex on FB does not mean that your guy is not over her or that he craves her. Most men gawkers look at curiosity and not any romantic or attachment issues that are typical of females. Your guy might be different but given how she ... (read in full...)
My Boyfriend wants me to send him nude pictures and I have said No. What can I say to him? He is very angry with me.
Q. Hi, me and my boyfriend are dating for about 7-8 weeks now; I know him for 6 months now. We have been on dates kissed and he even touched and pressed my breast but we have never done anything more than that . now he is asking me to give him m...
A. 19 June 2015: You should never send nude pic because in this digital age that evidence will live forever. Moreover, he is not your husband nor do you have any strong bonds with this guy, therefore absolutely NO nude pics. I think you handled yourself well, b... (read in full...)
Is this bullying? Jealousy?
Q. I work with an older woman and she is quite an honest person. But there is honesty , and then there is going too far. I don't understand what her issue can be with me. She's always criticising my hair. ( I have a few split ends, a lot of people d...
A. 18 June 2015: If this woman is of no consequence to your job and carries no threats to it, then look for ways to minimize conversation with her. I'm sure you can anticipate her ramblings, so be preemptive and go away from her. If you must listen to her then ... (read in full...)
Going to University in September. Will people think I'm strange if I'm wary of random hook-ups and the club scene?
Q. I will be going to University in September but I am really worried about the whole club scene. I am a pretty girl but I don't want people to come up to me and expect certain things. I will never have sex with anyone randomly and I have to be in a ...
A. 15 June 2015: Random hook ups and random sex is strange and abnormal, so your question maybe derived from a twisted reality. There is nothing abnormal with you although I wonder what sort of abberated social mores have shaped your question.
There... (read in full...)
My husband is drinking again!
Q. My husband is at it again, I had gotten our grandkids for the weekend, he stays out all night Friday drinking, then blames it on me, just cause it is his family he feels he can do that, if Idid half the things he do to me he would be upset, iI'm ...
A. 15 June 2015: Some men will react to threats of being left by those whom they love and as a result they may change their ways and stop drinking. The fact that he does not wake up and desire alcohol does not mean he is not an alcoholic because abusers behave t... (read in full...)
I was clear that I would only move if we got married ...
Q. Hi, my name is rebecca, Age 40 and from the USA. last July i moved to Sweden to be with my bf, 38 who is from Sweden. I have been in sweden for 1 year now and sadly he hasnt asked me to marry him yet. It was something i was very very clear with ...
A. 14 June 2015: Come up with an alternative financial plan, make sure it works then give him a deadline: marriage or you will leave. If he does not respond then leave. At your age you need to mind what's in your best interest as, evidently, he is minding what's ... (read in full...)
What does this tell you about her? I'm confused. Does she have feelings for me?
Q. So my friend has 3 best friends in order of S, J and L, I'm J but lately my friend who is in a lesbian relationship with L, told me she prefers me over S and L then asks if she's a bad person, I had sex with her once, and I don't know if she li...
A. 13 June 2015: Given that she is in a relationship but has had sex with you and is flirting with you then that makes her a cheater. I think your best course of action is to stay away from her because she already has someone she is romantically involved in. ... (read in full...)
Gym is packed most of the time, so how do I go up to him and start a conversation? Scared of rejection.
Q. Okay so I have been going consistently to the gym since january. Back when I was freshly single. I spotted someone very cute but I looked awful cause I go to work out not look at guys but something about this guy makes me want to go talk to him. ...
A. 12 June 2015: Start a convo about a particular exercise and its benefits. Pick the excercise he does most, and inquire about it and how you could use it. If he responds, take the convo and keep it as long as possible, getting his name so you can say hello to him ... (read in full...)
I find my teenager's brothers interests and behavior disturbing. what should I do?
Q. Hello. I have a little problem that i would like to share with you. Since i came back home from university 3 days ago i found a lot of things strange with my brother(15 year old). He has Hitler's posts everywhere even on his desktop(computer). I ...
A. 12 June 2015: Mixing Hitler with a specific "skinhead" dress could be worrisome because it is an initiation process into that subculture. Certain punk music also goes along with that lifestyle, so see if your brother dresses a certain way, listens to certain ... (read in full...)
Do you think I might still have a chance with him?
Q. I have a friend who I've known about four years. A few years ago he said he had feelings for me. I said I had previously liked him, but at that time i saw us more as just friends. We kept in touch very close, until I got into a relationship...
A. 11 June 2015: Since you are not attached to your ex, then meet up with him. See where all that goes. Obviously, your past seems to bring you together and if he meets your criteria go with him. ... (read in full...)
My Bf discovered I was flirting with guys on Tinder.So we broke up. How can I convince my now ex-Bf he is the only one for me?
Q. My long term bf has found out Ive been harmlessly flirting with guys on tinder without wanting to meet them. It was just harmless. We had a bust up over me going on dating sites and we were broken up for for a month. I never wanted anybody else...
A. 11 June 2015: I don't think that you can convince him with words because your deeds convinced him otherwise. Forgiveness is now his, not yours. He may or may not get back with you but be assured that no flirting is harmless, single or not. Idk the extent of your ... (read in full...)
How do I find a guy who's okay with casual dating but no sex?
Q. I'm 21, and due to a host of reasons (depression/SA etc.) I've never had a boyfriend, though my social life and career is OK again. Or even been on a date. I'm physically attractive so do get offers, but I still want to spend some time on my own ...
A. 10 June 2015: No sex, to me, means that you put some value to yourself and since I am picky who I want to be with, then the value is the obvious choice. ... (read in full...)
Does he really want me to leave? Do I leave like he told me to?
Q. Ive been with my husband for 10 years, married for for 7 years on the 14th. Sometimes when we argue he tells me to pack my stuff and leave. I never do. But this time.. i'm really considering packing my things. Our arguments are always over ...
A. 9 June 2015: The variation on statement "if you don't like then pack your stuff and leave" is a learned expression in which the angry party seeks to establish dominance by blaming you for dis-attachment. Therefore, if you are to do that he will feel absolved at ... (read in full...)
How do I stop obsessing over my married ex who would like to have sex with me?
Q. Hi.I feel really embarrassed writing this but I feel like I need to vent and maybe get some advice. I used to be involved with this guy. I lost my virginity to him (he doesn't know) and ended up really falling for him. It never turned into a ...
A. 9 June 2015: How about if you see him for what he is: a crook, double player and a scum. Copy all of his messages and send them to his wife. Then be sure you block him from contacting you and never speak to him. If you wanna be loved, find a guy who will love ... (read in full...)
How do I find a guy who's okay with casual dating but no sex?
Q. I'm 21, and due to a host of reasons (depression/SA etc.) I've never had a boyfriend, though my social life and career is OK again. Or even been on a date. I'm physically attractive so do get offers, but I still want to spend some time on my own ...
A. 9 June 2015: It is not a weird idea. Try through your church, or some of these social apps. There you can clearly spell out your criteria and since the network is wide you would land sone dates. In fact, if I was looking to date, a profile like yours would be an ... (read in full...)
I need help leaving this married man. I just can't do it!
Q. I have been here many times before. I am the loser who is in love with a married man. I know I need to leave but I just can't find it in myself to do it. I know he doesn't love me. He told me. And he told me he will never love me. I have ...
A. 9 June 2015: When you say that you are in love with a married man, you should remember that love exists only if you are being loved back. The problem is that he does not love you, so despite feelings that you have for him, those feelings are not love. If you ... (read in full...)
Almost 18 years married: Should I stay or should I go?
Q. I have been married for almost 18 years. We have 5 children ages 6 to 16. We only dated 6 weeks before we decided to get married because we were having sex, it was great, and we knew, being Christians and having met in church, that it was wrong. So ...
A. 7 June 2015: Your post is so full of accumulated angst, negativity and failed hope that untangling this web of ill will seems like more trouble then it's worth. At first I was going to question the amount of effort you put into fixing this marriage because ... (read in full...)
Is it reasonable that I feel hurt that he said he was disappointed - or was he just being honest ?
Q. Been seeing a guy for 3 weeks and all was going well. Last night we made out in his car and he asked me to be his gf, I said yes. After a little while he put his hand under my shirt which I wasn't ready for and I started to shake from nerves. H...
A. 7 June 2015: I think what he tried to say is that he is not looking for marriage, that the girlfriend he wants you to be does not mean is the girl that he wants to marry, that you shouldn't look at him as your future husband and/or some combination of these 3 ... (read in full...)
It's unsettling for me. Is it odd that he rarely makes eye contact when we're having sex?
Q. Is it odd for a man not to look at you while you're having sex? My boyfriend rarely makes eye contact while we're having sex. I've discussed this with him and also his preference for wanting to have sex in the dark. If the lights are on he...
A. 6 June 2015: After rereading your post and the comments, I want to follow up with a question as to whether he makes eye contact during normal interaction with people, during a conversation, for example? Not making eye contact during casual interaction with you ... (read in full...)
I like girls but like to watch gay porn and don't get turned on by girls. Am I gay?
Q. I still like girls but i like to watch gay porn and i dont get turned on by girls alot am i gay?...
A. 6 June 2015: I really don't care what sort of porn you are watching but I do care that you are watching it, and given your age, such porn is brutal on your brain. Numerous studies have recently come out showing how porn carves out degenerated neural paths in... (read in full...)
I can't remember if I cheated on my fiance, or not, last year, as I was so drunk. Should I tell my fiance?
Q. My fiance are together seven years, and for two years we struggled with infertility, which had us fighting a lot and caused a lot of resentment, stress and guilt for me. I felt like I had failed him, I couldnt give him what he wanted most. Last y...
A. 6 June 2015: You should keep your mouth shut and say nothing to your BF. Enough is the anxiety that you are having with it, so don't spread it. Accept the fact that you did a foolish deed, that the deed is yours and you cannot blame it on drinking or being ... (read in full...)
Are there guys out there who actually don't like strip clubs?
Q. Are there guys out there who actually DON'T like strip clubs? I live in a mining town and strip clubs are starting to pop up everywhere, and since mining is a very male dominated field, guys go there after work to bond, and blah blah. I've been tol...
A. 5 June 2015: Yea, most guys, single especially, will go and praise strip bars while fully cognizant that, no matter how dolled up those strippers are, he would never actually marry one. And it does become a problem in making friends if the guy is like me who ... (read in full...)
It's unsettling for me. Is it odd that he rarely makes eye contact when we're having sex?
Q. Is it odd for a man not to look at you while you're having sex? My boyfriend rarely makes eye contact while we're having sex. I've discussed this with him and also his preference for wanting to have sex in the dark. If the lights are on he...
A. 5 June 2015: Well, I am one of such guys who will not look in the eye during sex. I'd rather look at my woman overall and melt how she is enjoying the experience. Staring in the eyes during sex feels "creepy" as though I am at a staff meeting. Also, eyes do not ... (read in full...)
I'm crushing on a stripper!
Q. Went to a male strip club with a friend and had a blast! We weren't there for anything but dancing and the shows. I was dancing with my friend when I turned around and saw two very sweet blue eyes. He was a new dancer who seemed kinda serious and ...
A. 5 June 2015: Men in that business are interested in two things: making money and having sex with as many different women as possible. If you think that this guy is different, it's an act with which he wants to bed as many women as possible. If you met this dude ... (read in full...)
Am I too sensitive and am I overeacting to my Boyfriend's comments about other women?
Q. Tell me if I'm over reacting... My boyfriend and I are in our 40's and have been dating for almost 2 years. He has a habit of putting women down. It could be a stranger that walks by in public "wow is she fat" or even a friend of ours such as ...
A. 4 June 2015: Some men use disparaging statements about women that they come in contact with as a way to assure the woman with whom they are with that she is the best of the bunch and that he is happy that he has committed to such a woman. Even the stranger you ... (read in full...)
I want to know if my girlfriend's actions are normal, or if I am over reacting
Q. So i have been in a relationship for 8 years with this girl who is now heading to another country for her post graduate. She is super excited but is also acting super weird about it. She started stalking guys who will be in her batch, and tells...
A. 4 June 2015: If you overreacted then it could be perhaps in how you expressed yourself but, in general, what she is doing is highly upsetting. The fact that she does not care about your concerns nor is doing anything to calm the situation down implies that she ... (read in full...)
Should I stay or leave because of the behaviour of my fiancé?
Q. I've been with my fiancé for 4 years. He is hardworking, doesn't drink or smoke and has no interest in sports. He tells me he loves me every day. He is thoughtful in other ways too. What I can't get past is his staring at women every time we g...
A. 3 June 2015: It is hard to determine from your post whether your man has validation issues that are present in narcissoid disorders but some things you describe fit that: actively seeking approval from strange women even though one who loves him is in front of ... (read in full...)
Can women realistically start a family past 30?
Q. I suppose the purpose of this question is to hear from women who have started a family after the age of 30. Those of you in the UK might have seen that a top fertility doctor has just said publicly that women who want kids should try before t...
A. 2 June 2015: My wife was 33 when we got out first child. She was 35 for the second. We were too busy with our careers. ... (read in full...)
Why are women's emotional needs not considered as important as men's visual needs ?
Q. Why are women's emotional needs not considered as important as men's visual needs ? Men often say they need porn because they are visual and one woman can't meet their visual needs but women are emotional and men often don't meet our needs Is i...
A. 1 June 2015: I take issue about your statement on two grounds. First is using comparison of two separate things (porn viewing & emotional connections) to make an argument about porn addiction. And second, arguing that two wrongs (porn watching & emotional ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend like swinging, me not so much. Will I be enough for him?
Q. The general dilemma is that my boy for three years likes to swing, or likes the idea of swinging. After a few times of play,.. I have realized that I am not so much. about 6 months after we started dating we looked into one of his previous "fu...
A. 1 June 2015: In vast majority of cases swinging does not help relationships. The articles that you are citing which can come up in places like Huffington Post are typically anecdotal, out of ordinary, basically a statistical outlier, used to click bait peoe into ... (read in full...)
How will my husband ever forgive me for being unfaithful?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles. I have been married for four years and have two children with my husband. I absoloutly adore him. However, at a hen party two years ago, in a moment of madness, i kissed another man. It wasnt a proper kiss, as there were no ...
A. 1 June 2015: I think your husband either did not forgive you or he does not know the definition of forgiveness. To forgive means never to bring it back and blast you during arguments. So one thing you should clear up is which is it: fake forgiveness or clueless ... (read in full...)
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