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| | *abrielle Stoker's profile:Qualified to help people? Don't really know. Am in my twenties, currently working in the hospitality industry. Very open-minded on sex, probably too active for my own good. Flatter myself into thinking I'm reasonably intelligent and believe that my upbringing, difficult as it was, has given me a decent perspective on life. |
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She slept with my friend on the day we met
Q. Hi...This is my first post here.. I'm a 21 year old male and I met the girl of my dreams 1 month ago.. However, there are complications. I met her at a ''party'' at my friends house where she was the only girl... I chatted with her for a while ...
A. 14 September 2011: The question is not so much what she did in the past as it is about whether you think you can get past this.
She obviously did something stupid that, hopefully, she regrets. Try to get past it - she seems to love you and you say you have feelings... (read in full...)
My horrible first time experience haunts me!
Q. So me and my gf has been dating for 9 months now...we have intercourse a while back...it was my first time but not hers...when we did it we didn't use a condom i came in 3 seconds...yes i have a horrible premature ejaculation...luckily i pulled ...
A. 12 September 2011: Hey, it's not all unusual for a guy to cum very quickly the first time he has sexual contact, and again the first time with a new partner. By itself this does not have to mean anything other than you being very attracted to the girl. Only if it's a ... (read in full...)
Do any other men hate wearing underwear?
Q. Dear Cupid, my wife complains a lot about me not liking putting on underwears? Is it only me who hates them or their are some men out there as well. My wife thinks I hate them undies bse I am well endowed which I disagree with...I just hate them bse ...
A. 12 September 2011: I don't know about "hating" underwear, but I have occassionally, when unzipping a man's trousers, found that the goods were more easily accessible than expected. I haven't questioned any guy on this though - it didn't seem appropriate at the time - ... (read in full...)
Has anyone worried about having an unattractive child?
Q. so this isnt a bf/gf type question but i do need a bit of advice. Has anyone ever been worried about having an unattractive child? It may seem selfish....but i cant believe im the only one who has ever worried. Help please?...
A. 12 September 2011: I think it was Pasternak who wrote that every woman gives birth to a prince or a princess, it's just that child that doesn't live up to that...
A lot of women do worry - I know my own mother did (though she got lucky). One thing to recall though i... (read in full...)
Would u have sex with someone if they promised a job?
Q. would u have sex with someone if they promised you a job or if theyd support you but you were a virgin...
A. 12 September 2011: That amounts to abuse of a position of power (regardless of whether you are a virgin or not). Not only does it reflect badly on the person making the offer, but accepting it could have damaging long-term consequences on your mental well-being. All ... (read in full...)
Do ALL men really watch porn??
Q. I guess I should ask this as a curiousity question, aimed at men preferrably. Now, I have been on this site awhile and asked and answered a few questions. What I always hear on the topic of porn- ALL MEN WATCH PORN. Is this true? Now I will say...
A. 7 September 2011: Generalizations are odious. Most men do watch porn, it's easily available and its gratifying, after all - so it's pretty much just as most people would eat junk food or something. On the other hand there will be those who, due to their personal ... (read in full...)
Will women understand my problem? Or will they be put off or disgusted by my penis?
Q. I am 25 years old, and for various reasons I have not done much dating and not been sexual active. In retrospect, I realize that much of the reason why I have put off sexual activity is because I have phimosis (tight foreskin) and I think deep down ...
A. 25 August 2011: I've encountered a few men with your problem and speaking for myself, have never found anything "disgusting" about it. Granted, I'm more broad-minded than most, but I think your problem is really not something to give you sleepless nights. Will the ... (read in full...)
Question for the women: How often do you tell a guy the sex "great" or "amazing" or something similar?
Q. Question for the women: How often do you tell a guy the sex "great" or "amazing" or something similar? I realized the other day that my GF almost never says anything like that. But, then again we've been going out for several years so it seem...
A. 25 August 2011: In or out of a relationship, if I've had a good time, I do let the guy know. It could range from "You are absolutely amazing, darling" to "Nice load, sugar", but I do like to give a compliment. That said, I haven't been in a lot of relationships. ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to have a lasting marriage?
Q. I read so many questions here about married people who have fallen out of love, married people who cheat, married people who are tempted to cheat, etc. etc. Does marriage even mean anything these days, other than being tied together by law?...
A. 25 August 2011: Works for some people. In my extended family, certainly, I can count only 2 divorces, and though not all the relationships may be "happy" in the idealistic sense of the word, they do work. And then there are my parents, closing in on 35 years and ... (read in full...)
I masturbated on shemale porn. What does this mean?
Q. I have been watching straight porn quite lot for the last 2 years or so but of late gay thoughts striking my mind but when I looked at gay porn , it didn't turn me on but Shemale porn did and I masturbated like three times on watching Shemale porn. ...
A. 25 August 2011: It means that you, like a significant number of straight men in the world, are attracted to shemales. Don't read anything more into it - at the most you are bi-curious and that's it.... (read in full...)
Please help me to accept her past
Q. I’m in my first relationship and have been rocked by a revelation from my girlfriend. I’ve been trying to deal with it myself – for reasons that will become clear I can’t discuss it with friends – but it is driving my insane. I really need some help ...
A. 25 August 2011: Yos says everything perfectly well. I'd only add normally such an act would lead one to question the person's decision-making capacity, however she seems to genuinely regret her actions and that is a positive thing.... (read in full...)
How do I spit out cum without it being awkward?
Q. Okay so... My boyfriend is always asking me to give him a blow job, and i love doing it for him... one problem, i tasted cum once and hated it... he says he doesnt mind, that i can start with a blow job and that he will tell me when hes close to ...
A. 9 August 2011: He probably really doesn't care, but if you must, the trick is to push it out of your mouth with the tip of your tongue and let it run down your chin (if he cums within your mouth). If he cums near the back of your mouth or closer to the throat, ... (read in full...)
All about tattoos...just how bad is the pain?
Q. I know this isn't a relationship question, but I get a lot of great advice from this site and it's always my first choice. My question is for those who have tattoos. I've been looking at a lot of tattoo related things lately, and my biggest curio...
A. 27 July 2011: Depends on your pain threshold. Mine is decently high and it still zinged a bit. But nothing that can't be handled. It will pain a lot less when you're twenty though...I'd wait if I were you (assuming it's even legal to get a tattoo at your age).... (read in full...)
Can being nervous mean a man can't keep an erection?
Q. I recently went home with a man I've had a crush on for the past year or so. He is twice my age and we've known each other in a strictly professional capacity, so it was quite unusual and exciting to have the chance to sleep with him. When we got to ...
A. 18 July 2011: Most common cause of not being able to keep an erection.... (read in full...)
Is my husband having sex with someone else?
Q. me and my husband havent had sex in about 3 days on the 4th day we had sex he came extremly fast and it was thick kind of gooey like...is that a sigh of him having sex with with some one else?...
A. 18 July 2011: Not that the consistency of the output is a reliable indicator of whether the tool has been in recent use, but generally a quick load, that is thick and viscous (which I presume is what you mean by 'gooey') indicates that he has not had any sexual ... (read in full...)
What do you think of this tattoo idea?
Q. soo i turned 17 in april.. and lately ive been thinking a lot about wanting a tattoo. the problem is my mother will probably nott let me get one. she wont even let me pierce my tongue but has let me pierce my bellybutton when i was 15. the past ...
A. 14 July 2011: Wait until you are at least 18 and your body is in the sort of shape you expect it to be for a while.
Secondly, the tattoo you are proposing will be painful and a bit too large, I do think. (I have a few tattoo's myself so I do know what I'm talk... (read in full...)
Circumcised vs. uncircumcised
Q. Is there a difference between a circumcised and an uncircumcised penis when it comes to giving a handjob or a blowjob? I've only ever been with a circumcised man, and I was just wondering if there is anything I need to know should I encounter a man ...
A. 13 July 2011: Be careful handling it, the tip is sensitive for the uncircumsized guys. They're fun though, IF they keep clean.... (read in full...)
Husband confessed that he dreamt of coming home and finding me on top of another man having sex. I would love it, but not sure if I should do it
Q. I am a 33 year old married woman with 2 kids. Been married now for 13 years. Now, I won't make this long so I will just get to the point. I was a virgin when I got married and never been with another man, ever. My husband once told me that he would ...
A. 13 July 2011: I'm not the one to advise against doing something that I enjoy as much as I do myself, BUT you would be advised to consider whether you are both really ready for it. Don't rush into it unless you have both spoken about it and are double sure you ... (read in full...)
Girls: Have you ever been rejected?
Q. Girls have you ever approached a guy and had him reject you? I am not talking about being dumped. I am talking about when you first meet a guy, you put yourself out there and ask him out and he shoots you down. I have this theory. Most girls seem ...
A. 13 July 2011: Oh yes, more times than I wish to recall. Usually it's by 'nice' guys who don't want anything to do with a girl who has a reputation like mine. I suppose in percentage terms it's not that many, but in absolute numbers, yes, I've been rejected a fair ... (read in full...)
Is it because I'm a virgin?
Q. Hey, so im 16 and im dating my brothers friend who is 23. We are very close and have no secrets. He wants to marry me and have me live with him once I turn 18. He has this issue down south and he gets an extremely unbearable pain if he doesnt have ...
A. 7 July 2011: He's feeding you one of the oldest stories in the book. The 'buildup' can be relieved thru masturabtion. Don't let him guilt you into sex until you are ready and it is legal.... (read in full...)
If you are not beautiful? Beauty is so useless. Why do people give such a damn about it?
Q. I hate my body and can't accept it! let's just say that my body looks nothing like the 36-24-36 ideal of the media. And sure people say that it's the inside that matters but people are so hypocritical! Especially men! Because they say they want a ...
A. 4 July 2011: Beauty, like intelligence, the color of your skin and the amount of money in your parent's bank account, is something you're lucky to have, but not particularly unlucky not to.
Are all beautiful people successful or rich? No, not really. Many wor... (read in full...)
Question for the ladies: Do you find that there's a lot of variation from one man to the next in terms of how good the sex is, or do the vast majority of men tend to fall roughly in the middle range?
Q. Question for the ladies: do you find that there's a lot of variation from one man to the next in terms of how good the sex is, or do the vast majority of men tend to fall roughly in the middle range? As a man, I'd have to say the old saying that ...
A. 1 July 2011: Speaking from my experience (which would probably be classified as 'monumental') yes, different men perform diffrently. I don't have the time to write a treatise on the "7 types of men you will have sex with" at the moment, but let's say that while ... (read in full...)
Questions regarding a threesome...
Q. My boyfriend really wants a threesome. It will be me and him (obviously) and one of his friends, who is male. I have told him i wasnt interested but he is kinda talking me into it. however i do need some questions asking. Is it a good idea to be ha...
A. 1 July 2011: If your state of readiness is 60% it means you're not ready. It's the sort of thing you should only do if you are absolutely convinced.
... (read in full...)
Why do more white women than white men date outside of their race?
Q. This is just a simple question, not one with a lot details or anything. I was just wondering what people thought...um...why is it that there are more white women to date outside their race, then there are white men? I know this can be a ...
A. 30 June 2011: I shall resist the temptation to say "everyone wants THIS white woman, at least"....oh wait, I never was very good at resisting temptation.... :)
Jokes apart, the kind of pairings you will see will depend on the demographic make-up of the locality... (read in full...)
Emotionally abusive, untrusting, 10 year older boyfriend wants kids with me NOW, or else he's gone.
Q. Hello everyone. Some background info for my question: I'm 22, my boyfriend is 32. We've been living together about 2 years. We have had some problems in the past due to his emotional unstability. He has been jealous and paranoid, he has been emo...
A. 30 June 2011: Oh yes, I missed the part about college. My consistent advice to anyone who is not a trust-fund baby is to get the maximum possible education that you can afford (unless you propose to do it in one of those vague subjects that have zero relevance ... (read in full...)
Emotionally abusive, untrusting, 10 year older boyfriend wants kids with me NOW, or else he's gone.
Q. Hello everyone. Some background info for my question: I'm 22, my boyfriend is 32. We've been living together about 2 years. We have had some problems in the past due to his emotional unstability. He has been jealous and paranoid, he has been emo...
A. 30 June 2011: The decision to have children should always be a joint one and not one made under duress or under circumstances indicating coercion.
I do not have any authority to comment on your personal life, but the act of issuing on ultimatum on an issue is... (read in full...)
Will going on the pill mean I will put on weight? Or should I see a gynacologist instead?
Q. i'm currently in a relationship with an amazing guy. he's the first boyfriend i've ever had and the first person iv'e had any sexual contact whatsoever with. I also recently lost my virginity to him as well, and he wore a condom both times we'v...
A. 30 June 2011: The pill doesn't automatically lead to weight gain - certainly hasn't for me and I've been on it since I was 15. You probably should see a gyn before going on it by default though.... (read in full...)
No pregnancy options?
Q. I haven't had sex, and I don't plan on it anytime soon, but I am curious. If I were to be on the pill, have the guy have a condom on, make him pull out properly, and take the morning after pill...what are the chances I would become pregnant? Is it ...
A. 30 June 2011: The morning-after is an emergency contraceptive. If you are taking the normal BC pill as per prescription and also using a condom (pulling out is optional, really) the morning-after is not neccessary (nor recommended).... (read in full...)
Why do more white women than white men date outside of their race?
Q. This is just a simple question, not one with a lot details or anything. I was just wondering what people thought...um...why is it that there are more white women to date outside their race, then there are white men? I know this can be a ...
A. 30 June 2011: IF that is true (and I strongly doubt that it is a statistical certainty), it would tend to indicate that white women may be more open to dating outside their race than black women. One does find a lot of white men with asian girls these days, and ... (read in full...)
I've been seeing him for 2 weeks - do I buy him a birthday gift?
Q. Seeing a guy for about 2 weeks been on quite a few dates and chilled at his house a bit too, its his birthday this weekend, do I buy him a gift??? ...
A. 28 June 2011: Of course you do. Nothing extravagant, but something is to be expected. Something you've baked would be nice, if you do that sort of thing.... (read in full...)
Did my boyfriend pamper his ex better than he does me because she was prettier?
Q. Be honest guys, do you treat women who are prettier better/nicer/ with more respect than average looking women? I ask because my current partner of four years spoiled his partner rotten! Bought her anything she wanted and got into a TON of debt an...
A. 28 June 2011: It's one possibility - pretty women do get more attention (or else what's the point of being pretty?) though the attention can take different forms, not all as pleasant as that of a loving boyfriend.
I think it's something else, though. You've s... (read in full...)
Why am I always asked for sex? I'm not gorgeous!
Q. Ok I'm almost 19 and I don't need someone but something has been bugging me.First of all I'm not attractive especially compared to my friends. When I used to hang out with guys I was like one of them. Seriously, they seemed to think I was one of ...
A. 27 June 2011: Well first of all you may be more attractive than you think. Maybe not devastatingly gorgeous - few people actually hit the genetic jackpot on that - but definitely attractive enough to be propositioned.
Secondly, there's probably a strong r... (read in full...)
My 20 year old boyfriend can only ejaculate once a day. Normal?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 years now, throughout these 2 years he has only been able to ejaculate once a day. Sometimes if we've had sex multiple days in a row he needs a break, and can't even get hard, in fact sometimes I will just ...
A. 27 June 2011: Some men have a lower stamina than others. Once a day is still not what I'd call a low libido, maybe lower half side of average on a bell-curve. However if you need it more than he does, that's a problem you may need to think about.... (read in full...)
In the past she had affairs with married men! Is this a deal-breaker?
Q. a girl I have been dating for 6 months, and who up to now, I have liked a lot, revealed to me that in the past, not too distant, she dated a few married men. she is 28. one was when she was about 20, the other when she was 26. she slept with both of ...
A. 24 June 2011: It shows a regrettably faulty moral compass. If you are looking forward to a lasting relationship, that's not genreally a good thing. I've done the whole 'sleeping with married men' thing too, and regret every one of them (at least the ones I ... (read in full...)
Why can't my mom trust me?
Q. Why can't my mom trust me? I'm 14, about to go into high school. My best friend has invited me to go to her beach house with her and her family. My parents said I could go, so I immediately started packing. I packed most of my clothes (the others ...
A. 24 June 2011: It doesn't matter how old you are sometimes, mother's always beleive they can pack better than you :)
Look, I know it can be intensely irritating, but those of us who are older than you know that we've all been there and done that. Let it be. Pack... (read in full...)
My husband can't seem to ejaculate during oral. Is there something we can do?
Q. My husband can't seem to ejaculate during oral. As I've researched this it seems like it's a pretty common problem, but the reasons seems to be it's not enough or oral isn't done long enough. I have never timed myself, but I know I have gotten him ...
A. 24 June 2011: There are some men who just won't come through oral. Not a whole lot, but they do exist. I'm more experienced (and dare I say, more skilled) at giving oral than anyone I've ever heard of, and there's always the occassional guy for whom oral just ... (read in full...)
Do men or women have more one night stands?
Q. Has anyone done research about whether men or women are more likely to have one-night stands, flings, or other meaningless relationships? I am a man and I have never had a one night stand. None of the men I know well enough to ask about th...
A. 23 June 2011: 'So, when a woman tells you she's slept with 50 men, she might be telling you the truth, but she doesn't mention the 75 others she gave oral sex with, or didn't sleep with.
When a man tells you he's slept with 150 partners, he means to include e... (read in full...)
Do you ever have sex like a porn star???
Q. Just out of curiosity, do you ever have sex like a pornstar? If so, how often? All the time? Once in a while? Special occasions? (And by pornstar sex, I'm talking about stuff you would expect to see in a fairly vanilla porn video - no insane, dem...
A. 23 June 2011: Once upon a time, a long long time ago and in a city far far away from here, I did have sex 'like a porn star' because, well, I was one. That is to say, I appeared in porn movies, I doubt 'star' would be applicable by any stretch of the ... (read in full...)
How can I get my mum to stop opening my mail?
Q. Ok so here's my problem, I'm 21 years old and have lived away from home for about 4 years, working full time. This year I decided to go back into education so moved back home during term time. I come from a good family, however my mum is kind of ...
A. 22 June 2011: Can you divert your mail to your office address? Alternately have the post office hold it for you or open a PO Box. It's expensive but generally worth it.... (read in full...)
Girl I am dating drives me crazy by calling everyone "honey", "darling" and "baby"!!
Q. this may sound stupid but i cant help it that it is driving me crazy. this girl i am dating for 5 months is really getting to me because she calls people she knows casually things like "baby", "honey", "sweetheart", "love" and "darling"!! i'm ...
A. 22 June 2011: If she's a Southern girl, you probably are over-reacting, you know. We tend to be affectionate.
... (read in full...)
Do you believe in spanking your child?
Q. Do you believe in spanking your child? I've heard people say they believe in it and others believe that its wrong. Personally, i believe in it if they are out of control and have been warned repeatedly. Don't judge, it was how i was raised and my ...
A. 21 June 2011: My brother and I were occassionally at the receiving end of a smack or two. It was very infrequent but I think it did go some way towards instilling a sense of right and wrong. ... (read in full...)
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