My cousin has now totally blanked me. Should I persist in trying to talk to him about our night of passion together?
Q. Advice needed please. So Saturday night I invited my Cousin over for a chat and a catch up as I'm staying in the area while another family member is in hospital. My cousin and I are not close and although we've met a few times and went to the ...
A. 16 June 2015: I wouldn't be comfortable having with sex with any of my first cousins, too close to doing it with a brother in my book. Maybe he feels the same way and regrets his actions, only he knows. But when a guy, any guy cousin or not, totally "blanks" you ... (read in full...)
How much should a partner pay for 'board' in their partners home?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend and I have been living together for a year now and recently got engaged at the beginning of the year. He moved out home and moved into mine (i have a mortgage). We agreed he would pay a certain amount a week to cover bills. I pa...
A. 16 June 2015: Wow, I'd would be very resentful if I were you. Get a spreadsheet with all your monthly expenses. Remembering that he would have to be paying rent if he were living anywhere else, come to a fairer agreement in regards to the bills and mortgage. When ... (read in full...)
Is it weird to track your BF/GF's whereabouts on Find My Friends App on iPhone?
Q. What does everybody think of tracking your boyfriend or girlfriend's whereabouts on the Find My Friends App on iPhone? Where you use GPS to know exactly where they are on a map (or where their phone is) at any given time throughout the day... unless ...
A. 16 June 2015: You will never be at peace with this guy or the next one until you address the root of this problem. Your own insecurities will sabotage every relationship until you come to terms with them. Raising self esteem is a long road but it is quite ... (read in full...)
He said he "was thinking about me while getting his lapdances,"and thinks it's not cheating. Should I give him another chance?
Q. My bf, J (23) and I(25) are both military and have been together nearly 3 yrs, mostly long distance (we're 10 hrs apart now). At the start, we made boundaries for cheating. Since we're both jealous, we said kissing, flirting and all the various ...
A. 16 June 2015: Personally I find the "was thinking about me while getting his lapdances" excuse the most hilarious. Nice try Dude heh heh... (read in full...)
Wedding and friend issue: Am I justified in still feeling so angry and hurt? Why should I forgive and forget as she wants me to do?
Q. Struggling to move on after best friend break up. At this point, I feel like my friendship with my BFF is basically over, or at the very least, has become a simple, yet strained acquaintance-ship. In a nutshell, bff and I have been bff's for 20...
A. 15 June 2015: A Maid of Honor has actual duties to perform for the Bride, whereas the other bridesmaids just have to show up and look pretty, no offense but your sister can't actually perform those duties so it is rather odd that you decided to honor her memory ... (read in full...)
Why all the inaction in between? Does he really like me, or is he just bored?
Q. I have been friends with this guy for a little over 2 years. Last year, we attempted to date but when he didn't seem to value our relationship as much as i did, i drew back and ended it. I figured if he actually wanted to get into something serious ...
A. 15 June 2015: I will never for the life of me understand texting. Why can't two people just talk to each other? I'm sorry I can't help you but this doesn't sound like much of a relationship to me. Whatever you do, do not have sex with the guy until you have some ... (read in full...)
What to do about bully of a sister in law?
Q. Can't get away from her because she is living with my in laws. She is verbally abusive, aggressive, lies and manipulates. She's a spoilt adult who always gets her way. My in laws never tell her offend always make excuses for her. I don't trust h...
A. 13 June 2015: I don't understand why you can't have your daughter back if you have legal custody. Call the cops to come with you and go pick her up. Your in laws can't stop this if you are her legal guardian.... (read in full...)
What to do about bully of a sister in law?
Q. Can't get away from her because she is living with my in laws. She is verbally abusive, aggressive, lies and manipulates. She's a spoilt adult who always gets her way. My in laws never tell her offend always make excuses for her. I don't trust h...
A. 13 June 2015: I don't understand why you can't have your daughter back if you have legal custody. Call the cops to come with you and go pick her up. Your in laws can't stop this if you are her legal guardian.... (read in full...)
My husband's family are monsters and I don't want them to be around us!
Q. Hello, I'm in need of some advice. Course aren't we all? I'm 6 months pregnant and have a 7 year old as well. I'm with a very amazing lovable man. He is a wonderful father, and a blessing as a husband. He is my best friend and lover all in one...
A. 11 June 2015: We definitely need more info if you want some helpful advice.... (read in full...)
My in-laws are difficult to live with
Q. I've been living with my in laws because of financial reasons. My mother in law put heaps of pressure on us despite being in a bad financial position. I had lost my job and got no redundancy. But she said don't worry about it. Then didn't help. Yet ...
A. 10 June 2015: Why was my last response pulled? I want names.... (read in full...)
His daughter has moved in with her boyfriend and his parents and wants my boyfriend to pay her child support directly to her!
Q. So I've been dating this guy for a year his daughter is 17 now and my bf pays his ex wife child support for this girl but the mom doesn't spend it on their daughter so every month the daughter txt her dad for stuff that she "wants" I've have enough ...
A. 10 June 2015: Auntie Youwish is totally correct. The Dad HAS to follow the court's order to pay the mother or be held in contempt of court and that could mean jail time. He can of course give the daughter any other money he so wishes but not the child support ... (read in full...)
What to do about bully of a sister in law?
Q. Can't get away from her because she is living with my in laws. She is verbally abusive, aggressive, lies and manipulates. She's a spoilt adult who always gets her way. My in laws never tell her offend always make excuses for her. I don't trust h...
A. 9 June 2015: Who has legal custody of her?... (read in full...)
What can I do about feeling so confused? I think I've outgrown my partner.
Q. I need some opinions on my relationship of about a year and a half. I used to adore my partner but now I just care for him more as a friend. He seems lazy and slobbish lately, which of course makes me feel terrible but it also makes me want more...
A. 9 June 2015: Time to move on Honey. Be as kind as you are firm when you break up with him, do not give him a glimmer of hope to hang on to, remember like pulling off a bandaid. You just be as honest and kind as you can be. You will also be doing him a favor by ... (read in full...)
What to do about bully of a sister in law?
Q. Can't get away from her because she is living with my in laws. She is verbally abusive, aggressive, lies and manipulates. She's a spoilt adult who always gets her way. My in laws never tell her offend always make excuses for her. I don't trust h...
A. 9 June 2015: Okay so I guess my best advice is to stay away from your sister in law as much as you can. Have the in laws come over if you want to visit but let them know that the sister is not invited and should stay home.... (read in full...)
What to do about bully of a sister in law?
Q. Can't get away from her because she is living with my in laws. She is verbally abusive, aggressive, lies and manipulates. She's a spoilt adult who always gets her way. My in laws never tell her offend always make excuses for her. I don't trust h...
A. 8 June 2015: Do you live with your in laws as well? Or do you and your husband have your own place? Cause if it's the latter then just don't go over to the in laws and only invite them to your place and make it clear that you aren't including the sister in the ... (read in full...)
I'm so happy with the dog and our family of three that I don't feel the need to have kids anymore. Has anyone else been in this situation?
Q. My partner and I have been trying to conceive now for nearly 2 years without any luck. When we originally began trying, starting a family was all I could think about. I'd always wanted to become a mother and my maternal urges nearly all-consu...
A. 4 June 2015: As long as it's "we feel" instead of just "I feel" then there shouldn't be a problem. Just make sure you and your partner are totally on the same page on this topic. I have two rescue dogs that I love to bits but I also have three kids and 11 ... (read in full...)
How do I win him back and feel better? My Mom and My Aunt don't like him
Q. I fell for this guy; I'm 23 and he's nearly 30. He seems to like me and he's also sexually attracted to me. However, I haven't been able to date him as I was trying to finish off my degree at the time. This is still an on-going problem as I'm s...
A. 29 May 2015: Sorry but I'm with your Mom and Aunt on this one. It must be so very difficult for them to see you get hurt repeatedly by this major asshole. The fact that you still go back for more and actually want a relationship with him must also be very ... (read in full...)
Should I be allowed a lock on my door?
Q. Hello, opinions on my situation please. I currently live with my step mum dad and little sister. My little sister is my half sister my step mum is her mum. Ive only lived with them for a few months. I used to live with my mum other sister, I was ve...
A. 26 May 2015: Get a job and move into your own place, like you said, your are a full grown adult. Is there some reason you don't want to act like one?... (read in full...)
Boyfriend of 10 years wants kids and I don't
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over ten years and everything is great - I love him and I know he loves me. But the problem is that he wants kids and I don't. We started dating when we were teenagers so it really wasn't an issue ...
A. 26 May 2015: My husband was married for seven years to his first wife. One of the reasons he divorced her is because she didn't want children, there were other issues as well but he definitely wanted children. We just celebrated our 40th anniversary, 3 kids and ... (read in full...)
Will my compromise work? My boyfriend has become very sexually posessive, and it's starting to bother my husband.
Q. My husband has always allowed me to have sex with other men and this has, up till now, made for a very fun and happy marriage of almost 20 years. I have been with my latest lover for a couple of years now and am very much in love with him (and wi...
A. 21 May 2015: I got nothin'...... (read in full...)
I need a list of tips for dealing with retroactive jealousy (RJ). What can you suggest?
Q. I've been suffering with RJ for almost 5 months. My partner and I are so close, so in sync that we do literally feel made for each other. Our pasts aren't nearly as extensive as most, and we're *almost* even. Still, being so close has given...
A. 21 May 2015: You really do need some professional help with this. Work a second job if you have to because this may be problem with any partner you may have.... (read in full...)
Why is he so against unblocking me & why is he still with this other woman? What does she have that I don't?
Q. Hi, I had a bad fall out with my ex a few months back over another girl he was seeing on the sly. I was ready to forgive him as we were only casually seeing each other - but he had already blocked me by then. The thing is - 6 months down the l...
A. 20 May 2015: What does she have that you don't? Well for one thing she has your ex's attention. Other than that I wouldn't know. However I do know that he certainly has moved on and that's exactly what you should do. Don't waste time beating a dead horse.... (read in full...)
I'm wondering if it'd be weird from a female prospective if I pursued this.
Q. I feel stupid right now... SO I'm at the library and a girl I haven't seen in a long time and actually didn't remember walks up to me and basically acknowledges that she remembers me from church, etc. We had a very brief chat and I ended things with ...
A. 20 May 2015: I don't think it would come across as weird if you find her number and call her up and ask if she would like to go out for coffee or lunch or something low keyed. Just say you enjoyed speaking with her and would like to continue the conversation. ... (read in full...)
I'm considering quitting my job before I go on vacation.
Q. I've been working part time at a job for 4 years now and I'm starting to become very annoyed and bored with it. Also, both of my managers are assholes and treats me like shit, despite me being one of the best and most hardworking employees there. I...
A. 20 May 2015: It is wise to leave on good terms with your employer, don't burn bridges.... (read in full...)
Should I be feeling guilty? She got offended because I WANTED to use a condom
Q. I really am losing faith in humanity. Here goes: I’m 26, and a mature(ish) student at University. I recently got with a girl who I’d had my eye on for some time. We’d been hanging about in the same group of friends for several months and would fl...
A. 19 May 2015: You absolutely did the right thing. You have no reason to feel guilty except for maybe having a momentary lapse in judgment in choosing a sex partner. ... (read in full...)
What did this kiss mean from my ex/FWB?
Q. I would really value some advice on my ex fwb, then friend, now I-don't-know-what! We've always kept in touch since the benefits ended (I got a boyfriend, but not anymore). He says he always enjoys my company, and recently we have started to go out ...
A. 18 May 2015: Keep doing what you are doing. Time will tell where this may be going. Just beware that going from a FWB to a full blown serious relationship is on the rare side.... (read in full...)
How can I get over feeling I'm too old to have a girlfriend at 26? How should I flirt, talk to and approach women?
Q. The fact i'll be 27 in a few weeks and I still haven't had a girlfriend yet, obviously still a virgin, the fact that I didn't have my first girlfriend and didn't lose my virginity around the age-range most people do just makes me bitter and ...
A. 15 May 2015: Yes the I'm afraid the boat has sailed for you. You are now just swimming around in the sea of misery and self-pity. I hope you are a good swimmer cause I don't envision you reaching dry ground for quite awhile.... (read in full...)
He doesn't even try anymore. How to put the sparkle back into our relationship?
Q. I have 2 kids with the guy i've been with for 3 years . He slept for half of mothers day, we got some icecream when i demanded it but he also got to wash his car while i ate the icecream in the car. I complimented him the whole day without hear...
A. 11 May 2015: For Father's Day get yourself something really nice.... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to send his Mom flowers? My Bf's family treat poorly and bully me.
Q. I have been in a relationship,three years. my boyfriend's family hates me, no overplay on the word, hate; believe me, I wish I was. His sisters bully me at every opportunity they get. BTW, I am not young, I am in my 50's. I have no family ...
A. 7 May 2015: All this bad behavior just begs the question, Why are with this guy? Sounds like you will always come second to any family member. I just wouldn't settle for that, nope, nada, no way. Lives with his sister? Really?... (read in full...)
How can I saw no without causing offence? Should family be putting this pressure on me, hinting that they want to come to stay?
Q. I broke up with my partner and live alone. I am not lonely and am enjoying my freedom. I work a lot of week ends. Since I have been single I have had strong suggestions from close family and friends for them to come and stay, with diaries ope...
A. 7 May 2015: Oh Cindy, you loquacious Auntie you, lol... (read in full...)
How can I saw no without causing offence? Should family be putting this pressure on me, hinting that they want to come to stay?
Q. I broke up with my partner and live alone. I am not lonely and am enjoying my freedom. I work a lot of week ends. Since I have been single I have had strong suggestions from close family and friends for them to come and stay, with diaries ope...
A. 7 May 2015: I live at the beach in North Carolina and as soon as I moved here my popularity soared. Friends and relatives started coming out of the woodwork. I have had to really put my foot down with some of them. I did exactly what Honeypie suggested, I had a ... (read in full...)
Should my Mom and I continue to share the same boyfriend?
Q. My mom A fell pregnant at 15 and dropped out of school. She later completed her matric and qualified as a nurse. While my mother was studying my grandparents cared for me. My mother did not neglect me but regretted that she could not give me all ...
A. 6 May 2015: Ahh The Three Billy Goats Gruff! Who's that trip trappin' across my bridge!... (read in full...)
Met him in a water polo. Based on his action, do you think he like me?
Q. i met a guy in my waterpolo class in the fall that I unintentionally fell for. Over the winter break, I added him on fb and messaged him about the class once, to which he replied immediately. We didn't have class together in the winter, so I didn't...
A. 1 May 2015: And once again you are going to get the "You should ask him out" responses which you will totally ignore...again. Why do you keep posting this question? What do you really want to hear?... (read in full...)
He hasn't kissed me in a year. But he finds time to watch porn. what should I do?
Q. My boyfriend hasn't kissed me romantically in years. We barely have sex, and it is boring, always the same position. He watches very x rated lesbian porn and knows it bothers me and he obviously doesn't care. He is obsessed with woman and is c...
A. 28 April 2015: Yep, time to trade up Dear.... (read in full...)
I'd like to ask her out but I have misgivings of being thought of as a sleazeball!
Q. There's this girl in my honors seminar group at university that I have a sight crush on. While a part of me would like to ask her out so that I might be able to get to know her better, another part of me is reluctant to do so. I really don't want to ...
A. 28 April 2015: If you just ask her out for a coffee or drink what's sleazy about that? Go for it Buddy!... (read in full...)
My mom has always been mean to me ever since I was just a child, but she's gotten worse and worse and I'm really heart broken.
Q. I have not spoken or seen my mom in almost a year. To put it nicely, she was never a good mom. She was emotionally and physically abusive through out my entire life, and has never changed. I've always tried to talk with her about our problems and...
A. 22 April 2015: If unloading some of your grief to a counselor by all means do it. Some people have no business reproducing, your mother is a prime example. Just know that in the long run it is her loss that she wasn't a better mother. This will dawn on her in her ... (read in full...)
Why has this girl I have suspicions about suddenly gone MIA from my BF's classes?
Q. Why has this girl suddenly disappeared from my BF's martial arts classes? I accused my BF of flinging with this girl. He denied it and still does. He is a martial arts instructor. We are both in his class. I told him I don't like her, have my eye...
A. 22 April 2015: Good riddance until the next female student gets your gut in another uproar.... (read in full...)
Whose surname should our baby take?
Q. Hi I was wondering what peoples oppinions were on surname for children. My first child has my surname as he's dad doesn't bother with him anyway, am pregnant with my second only been with the dad about 8 months we are not married who's surname ...
A. 22 April 2015: Definitely your surname. This guy could fly the coop at any time. ... (read in full...)
Why has this girl I have suspicions about suddenly gone MIA from my BF's classes?
Q. Why has this girl suddenly disappeared from my BF's martial arts classes? I accused my BF of flinging with this girl. He denied it and still does. He is a martial arts instructor. We are both in his class. I told him I don't like her, have my eye...
A. 20 April 2015: If you trust this gut feeling so much I guess you need to break things off with the boyfriend. He has already denied having anything to do with the girl but your gut says differently. So your really have no choice if you truly have trust in your gut ... (read in full...)
Why has this girl I have suspicions about suddenly gone MIA from my BF's classes?
Q. Why has this girl suddenly disappeared from my BF's martial arts classes? I accused my BF of flinging with this girl. He denied it and still does. He is a martial arts instructor. We are both in his class. I told him I don't like her, have my eye...
A. 20 April 2015: How do you know her car was gone all night? Were you camped out in front of her house?... (read in full...)
The fog has worn off the affair but I love my married boyfriend. It's hard to stay but also hard to leave. What do I do?
Q. I am having a difficult time. No judgment please. Just help. I am the mistress of a married man and I have been for almost 2 years. I have heard it all. Believe me. Nobody can punish me more than I have punished myself. The problem is I am i...
A. 15 April 2015: if you were in control you could make him leave his wife for you. You
can't so you aren't. You are just some sperm depository living in a dream world. And you have been for a number of years. Such a waste.... (read in full...)
The fog has worn off the affair but I love my married boyfriend. It's hard to stay but also hard to leave. What do I do?
Q. I am having a difficult time. No judgment please. Just help. I am the mistress of a married man and I have been for almost 2 years. I have heard it all. Believe me. Nobody can punish me more than I have punished myself. The problem is I am i...
A. 14 April 2015: Cut off the sex and see how strong your "relationship" is. He'll be gone in a flash. The only "needs" of his that you are filling are sexual. You are a body just a body, which as you so rightly pointed out can be replaced. Your youth and beauty will ... (read in full...)
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