I think I'm more into my BF than he is into me. Should I just back off?
Q. I have invested my heart and fallen in love with my boyfriend of five months. He also says he loves me. But I am always anxious. He is a musician and left on tour two weeks ago. He wanted to stay together and he's been calling every day. Troub...
A. 16 September 2011: Guess what?
He was cheating. He started an online relationship with a woman 2 weeks after he left on tour and a week before I flew out to see him.
I found evidence of it on his computer when he got back to our town.
I broke up with him. ... (read in full...)
I don't love him. Should I leave?
Q. You shouldn't leave the one you love for the one you like. but what if i don't LOVE him? Overtime my feelings towards my boyfriend of 5 months have changed. I never really found him physically attractive, and now since we are back at school, i don...
A. 16 August 2011: Yes! It will be doing both of you a favor. The longer you stay the more hurt he will feel when you break up with him and the more you will miss his company. Just be really nice and say that you don't feel that way towards him anymore and that... (read in full...)
What kind of immature cop-out is the "the chase"?
Q. Why can't guys have honest, loving relationships? Are they not man enough to have them? If I care for a guy, why do I have to play coy and hard to get for his attention? Mind-games are disrespectful and hurtful. If he doesn't want the comfort, ...
A. 16 August 2011: I am going through the same thing. Gave my boyfriend of 9 months my undying attention and devotion. If he called I answered the phone. If I couldn't I'd text him back. Eventually he pulled away and showed me less attention. I kept calling. Then I ... (read in full...)
Should I consider us over?
Q. The guy I've been seeing for the past 3 months has been kind of distant. I moved to a new city for work. Now I'm about an hour away and we haven't really had the break up talk. He doesn't pick up calls and he doesn't answer texts reliably. I ...
A. 2 August 2011: Call him with the intention of ending it in a brief phone conversation for your own closure.
If he doesn't pick up, leave a business like message that you need to speak to him.
If he doesn't call back, then fire off an email saying everythin... (read in full...)
There's one fantasy he wont share with me, was it okay to make the offer to him anyway if he changes his mind?
Q. You guys have always given me good advice. I have written in before. I am a 31 year old woman. I wrote in earlier about my husband wanting a strip tease for his birthday and wanting to have sex with my while I was bound up. I adore my husband...
A. 1 August 2011: I think it is awesome that you and your husband already have such an open sex life.
I don't think it was wrong at all for you to make that offer - as long as YOU are okay with being hit/spanked during sex.
The first time he spanks you - it ... (read in full...)
How can I prove my feelings for her and win her back?
Q. Bare with me on this guys, I know I sound like a complete idiot for what I've done but if anyone can give me advice then I obviously need to say what's happened in the past. I was with my girlfriend for 1 year and 4 months. It started well, th...
A. 1 August 2011: Maybe you are too young if you Could not settle down and are still feeling "the grass is always greener".
Why did you think you were better than her? That's something that probably won't go away.
I say let it go. ... (read in full...)
Should I just let him pursue me instead?
Q. Hi everyone. Can you tell me if a guy is interested in me if he does not reply to my email? I sent him an email asking him to get together with me but no reponse from him. It has been a week and I happened to run into him at the mall yesterday. ...
A. 1 August 2011: No one is TOO busy to send a quick email or meet you for a coffee on a lunch/dinner break.
Not trying to be mean, but when I guy is interested, he will make the effort and make sure he sees you.
You already made it clear that you want to hang... (read in full...)
My boyfriend had a friend from out of town visit for a week and pretty much disappeared on me.
Q. is this normal, or should I be concerned? My boyfriend had a friend from out of town visit for a week and pretty much disappeared on me. They've been out from morning until night the whole time. Although my bf has texted me things like "I m...
A. 1 August 2011: How long have you been dating?
Are you sure the friend is male? I'm not trying to make you paranoid - but I agree it's a bit odd to not even get a quick meeting.... (read in full...)
I have no bf and I don't want to masturbate...but I want sex so badly! What should I do??
Q. Dear Cupid, I want to have sex, I want it really bad! But I have no BF, I don't want to masturbate and I don't want to watch porn. I mean, I want to make love with someone but I have failed to get a BF. Hey, I am female 30 yrs, professional and ...
A. 30 July 2011: Do you not watch porn or masturbate for religious reasons?
If so, maybe look for a partner at your house of worship, or ask your friends who you trust to set you up. Or use a dating site geared towards religion and serious relationships. I've see... (read in full...)
Husband caught playing "sexual chicken" now what?
Q. I've been married to my husband for over a year. Two months ago I found a sexually explicit text on his phone (I wasn't snooping, it displayed the text when I plugged his phone in the charger. You can bet I snooped after that, though). It was from a ...
A. 29 July 2011: I'm surprised he didn't lock his phone or change the password after he knew you saw the texts the first time? Especially if he continued to do this after!
Makes me wonder if he wants out but is chicken and hoping you break up with him?... (read in full...)
I don't want any drama but feel like I am being taken advantage of....
Q. A man that I was seeing for 3 months has gone overseas. He has been gone for 4 months and I knew as soon as I started dating him that he would be leaving very soon to take this trip. We were crazy for each other so we went ahead and kept dating ...
A. 27 July 2011: In his defense the messages that you are seeing of his do not appear overly flirtatious. Are those private messages or wall posts? Do you have his password?
That being said : a guy alone meeting up with a girl alone is not kosher. And the "not... (read in full...)
I don't want any drama but feel like I am being taken advantage of....
Q. A man that I was seeing for 3 months has gone overseas. He has been gone for 4 months and I knew as soon as I started dating him that he would be leaving very soon to take this trip. We were crazy for each other so we went ahead and kept dating ...
A. 25 July 2011: This is not the actions of a man serious about you.
I'd have a conversation with him and tell him that you will begin dating other people since it's apparent he is pursuing other women. ... (read in full...)
I don't want any drama but feel like I am being taken advantage of....
Q. A man that I was seeing for 3 months has gone overseas. He has been gone for 4 months and I knew as soon as I started dating him that he would be leaving very soon to take this trip. We were crazy for each other so we went ahead and kept dating ...
A. 25 July 2011: When will he be back from this trip?... (read in full...)
He'll go days without texting me or seeing me, and now this summer is an LDR... I'm feeling neglected!
Q. Hey Agony Aunts! I have a problem for you. To keep this short - my boyfriend has communication issues, where he'll go days without texting me or seeing me while we're both at uni, making me feel nelgected and unwanted. I've told him twice about th...
A. 25 July 2011: I'm a little older than you - but I have been in the SAME exact situation. And I STILL don't know the answer.
Posters on this board have told me I'm too needy - but I still believe it is NOT too much to ask or expect that your boyfriend at least... (read in full...)
I cheated but feel no guilt...should I stay or should I go?
Q. My girlfriend and I are having intimacy problems. We've been together for 5 years. It seems to me like things fizzled very early in our relationship. She is perfect in so many ways, but this is killing me. She's 28 and I'm 30. which means its almost ...
A. 21 July 2011: You should not already be in a sexless relationship before marriage.
You don't feel guilty because you know you are entitled to love and passion and affection. You may be "dead" emotionally when it comes to her.
I would take a break. It seems yo... (read in full...)
Cheated and feeling very guilty, how do I get over this and have a healthy relationship with my girlfriend?
Q. I am a 29 years old man. I have a girlfriend who is living in a long distance with me. We used to live together and had a intimate relationship. Since she has left there was some problem between us. Basically it seemed that problem was only my side. ...
A. 13 July 2011: Try to talk to your girlfriend first about why she is neglecting you. You said she said she has to "look out for herself". It sounds like she is bitter or resentful about your distance. Did you choose to move away from her? Are you planning to move ... (read in full...)
So is my 'boyfriend' cheating on me? What should I do? Please help.
Q. ive been talking to this guy that i work with for about 2 years. we've always had something going on like kissing all the time flirting and texting.. a week and a half ago, he asked me to be his gf. he always tells me he is in love with me and i ...
A. 12 July 2011: How do you know they are just not friends?
Go to the beach with him and then ask if he's ever dated anyone else from work. Tell him you are hesitant to have any work place drama and see what he says. (don't bring up FB photo - just use that inf... (read in full...)
How do I ask him (again) how he sees me without scaring him off?
Q. Okay so I met this really cute guy a few weeks ago while we were both working at a Trade show in L.A. I thought he was cute, but also didn't think he'd go for me. He ended up asking me out and our first date was super fun. He was constantly ...
A. 9 July 2011: I wouldn't ask again but I also wouldn't sleep with him again for a bit. It seems like you want more than just FWB.. So just go on a few more dates and get to know each other again and then ask again before sex.
... (read in full...)
My sex drive is much higher during that time of the month. Is this normal?
Q. I am 20 and have noticed that I am so much hornier when I have my period. It's awfffuullll....... Do other women experience this? Men, do you recognize with the women you're with? Thanks for anything. :)...
A. 8 July 2011: Yep, this is quite normal. If you can really be in tune with your body - you will notice that your absolute horniest day is probably the day before your period comes. I try to take advantage of that night. :) As you get older, men - in general ... (read in full...)
Did he lose interest? How do I make him want me again?
Q. My boyfriend left for camp Monday morning. I stayed the night at his house Sunday night after he asked me to. We didn't do anything sexual and haven't gone farther than touching and making out. I'm 16, he's 17, and we've been talking for about a ...
A. 2 July 2011: He left Monday and it's only Friday. So you are worried about no communication for three days?!? Don't. It doesn't mean he lost interest. It probably means he's just busy and preoccuppied with his new surroundings. Don't worry. I'm sure it wi... (read in full...)
We have a great relationship except for the fact that I am just his girlfriend, and he doesn't EVER want to marry me.
Q. I hope someone can help me with this problem. I am back in the dating scene after 10 years of marriage. I NEVER thought I would want to get married again, but I have found someone that I don't want to live without. When we began dating, I made i...
A. 1 July 2011: What is his reason for never getting married ? Is he afraid of commitment? Does he think it sours a relationship? Is he afraid of getting hurt? What does he say?... (read in full...)
BF unexpectedly dumped me. I need some support
Q. Hey, I'm really devastated right now and really hurt. My boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me. When it happened i felt as if i couldn't breathe. I mean, he just broke up with me out the blue. The day before the break up we were all fine. He sai...
A. 27 June 2011: Ugh! I've been there and it is the worst ! I am so sorry.
When it's happened to me, I think "well if he can't see my worth, then he is not worth my time". Then I get excited that my real husband to be is still out there.
To get thru the emp... (read in full...)
BF FB account getting hacked - he suspects me instead of his ex, though I think there is more to it. What is going on here?
Q. My boyfriend of over a year and I live together. His ex was kind of sneaky and would go through his phone and emails and use his passwords or hack into his accounts. But, she would admit to it all eventually he says. Well, early in our ...
A. 21 June 2011: Why hasn't he changed his password if he thinks you or ex accessing his account?! That's basic 101. Does he just love drama? Could he be making it up? Tell him to change his password ASAP and see what he says. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend claims she got an STD from a towel or mat from her yoga class!! Is that really possible or is it more likely that she cheated on me?
Q. My girlfriend had a vaginal discharge for some time which worried her greatly. She was worried she had some sort of cancer. We had not been sexually active in quite some time (more than a year). She went to the doctor and she diagnosed her with tri...
A. 21 June 2011: Why don't you ask her for permission to talk to her doctor? All three of you can be in the room and if it's true - the doctor will tell you. If she freaks and says no - then I think you habe your answer.
You should also be tested. So when you do t... (read in full...)
Feeling very guilty for cheating on my girlfriend....should I tell her?
Q. I cant stop this terrible feeling of guilt after cheating on my girlfriend recently. I want to tell her but im scared if i do i will lose her. She means the world to me and im gutted ive now ruined everything after a stupid one night stand. Ive lied ...
A. 13 June 2011: I would first figure out why you cheated. Is there something wrong in your relationship or were you just feeling tempted and gave in to one night? Did you think about her while you were cheating or only after?
If you can honestly say you'd ne... (read in full...)
Girlfriend claims she got an STD from a towel or mat from her yoga class!! Is that really possible or is it more likely that she cheated on me?
Q. My girlfriend had a vaginal discharge for some time which worried her greatly. She was worried she had some sort of cancer. We had not been sexually active in quite some time (more than a year). She went to the doctor and she diagnosed her with tri...
A. 13 June 2011: You glossed over the fact that you and she have not been sexually active in more than a year!?! What is going on there?
are you having sex outside the relationship? Or did you think you were both celebate for a year? ... (read in full...)
Ex's Cold Behavior
Q. My ex broke up with me over a stupid reason, a minor disagreement that occurred between us. However, instead of trying to talk things out like a normal person, he decides to dump me. He always does this! Whenever there is a problem that occurs or he ...
A. 12 June 2011: Wow. He is really raking you over the coals. And YOU are the only one who can stop it. Take back your own power and move on. He is acting like a jerk and you should never have to beg to be with someone. If it was truly you guys "working on your ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend acting suspicious (for nothing) or am I over analyzing his actions?
Q. So... my bf got keeps some texting habits from me. He said he wasn't ever allowed to text in a past relationship and so he hid it and now does the same, even though I don't care who he texts. We had this problem for a while, I usually brushed it ...
A. 12 June 2011: Oh. I've been down this road too. In my case, him hiding his computer when I walked in the room was because he had been looking at porn and was embarrassed that I'd find out or afraid I'd get mad. He was also a secret texter. I did check his phone - ... (read in full...)
Was it love, a crush, or just a game for him?
Q. I've been thinking about this for a while and I need your help to find out what exactly what was going on. It's kind of long but I want to give you as accurate a picture as possible. So I had a coworker a few years back that I thought was cute...
A. 11 June 2011: Please don't settle. Isn't it better to be alone and waiting for love than together with someone you don't love?... (read in full...)
Was it love, a crush, or just a game for him?
Q. I've been thinking about this for a while and I need your help to find out what exactly what was going on. It's kind of long but I want to give you as accurate a picture as possible. So I had a coworker a few years back that I thought was cute...
A. 10 June 2011: It may have just been a way for him to safely flirt and get attention outside of his relationship. It does sound like you guys had chemistry and he cared about you - but not enough to act or leave his girlfriend. I'd try to forget about him.
H... (read in full...)
I think I'm more into my BF than he is into me. Should I just back off?
Q. I have invested my heart and fallen in love with my boyfriend of five months. He also says he loves me. But I am always anxious. He is a musician and left on tour two weeks ago. He wanted to stay together and he's been calling every day. Troub...
A. 3 June 2011: Thank you again for all those who helped.
Things are much better now that the nightly shows are over for a bit. He still calls every day (I told him he didn't have to and that I realize I was being needy). Now the conversations are much longer a... (read in full...)
My girlfriend stayed out for the night and told me she had to share a bed with another man! This is unacceptable to me. What does everyone else think?
Q. My partner went on a night out with her work mates and missed the late train back. See was with two females and 1 male - so they got a family room at a hotel. When she got back the next morning she told me she had to share a bed with the male...
A. 31 May 2011: It seems nothing sexual happened since she told you abou it , but I'm wondering if she told you about it to make you jealous? Have you been giving her less attention and maybe this is a way to say "hey, look how easy I could have someone else?"... (read in full...)
Now that we've met he doesn't initiate contact like before?
Q. Hi all. I would appreciate some opinions on this matter. Thanks! I met a guy on a dating website. It is the first time I have ever used a site like that. We got to know each other and eventually met. I think it went well, and I really like him....
A. 29 May 2011: Some people on dating websites are just there for "hookups" ; some are there to have a rotation of women to see (which could mean you see him once every two weeks) and some are there for a realtionship (boyfriend). While still in the dating stage... (read in full...)
My husband wont end his affair
Q. Hi, i was hoping someone could advise me on my heartbreaking marriage. 3 years ago i found out my husband was having an affair, he swore he would give her up but he never did. Throught the 3 years ive found upto 30 secret phones - i bin them but...
A. 29 May 2011: I am also from a strict catholic family so I understand your concern. However - talk to your mom or dad or whoever you are worried will shun you and tell them how heart broken you are and what HE is doing. If you are catholic then he must be too? He ... (read in full...)
I think I'm more into my BF than he is into me. Should I just back off?
Q. I have invested my heart and fallen in love with my boyfriend of five months. He also says he loves me. But I am always anxious. He is a musician and left on tour two weeks ago. He wanted to stay together and he's been calling every day. Troub...
A. 27 May 2011: Thank you Agnony aunts!! This is why I write here. For the brutal and honest outside opinion. Yes, I clearly know I'm insecure but you made me realize just how well I am not hiding it and more importantly how it is taking a toll on me. I'm not ... (read in full...)
Should I believe him when he says he loves me?
Q. I really believe my boyfriend doesn't love me anymore. We have been together almost three years, have a child together, and I am about two seconds away from walking out the door. We are at our last straw with couseling and because he picked a sex ...
A. 27 May 2011: It sounds like you already know what you need to do.
I get what you are going thru. My last boyfriend of 3 years said he loved me but the actions never matched the words. I could be in the same room with him and never feel more alone in my life.... (read in full...)
Oral sex with a canker sore?
Q. so i perform oral sex on my gf and i had a canker sore... im super scared and so is she...can she catch somthing from it??? and if so what?? ...
A. 26 May 2011: Canker sores and what we nicely describe as "cold sores" can really be herpes 1. The so called "good kind". Even children who are Not yet sexually active can have it. (face) Herpes 2 was traditionally the genital kind but both can be present ... (read in full...)
Fiance cannot stop bringing up old lovers!
Q. My fiance can not stop bringing up my past lovers and Its ruining our sex life, as well as our relationship. I am 27 years old and have been with 38 men, and I'll admit, thats a lot. I have much regret for my bad choices in lovers, and wish I ...
A. 25 May 2011: Whoa! HE is giving you a hard time about your past sexual experiences and he is the one who has cheated on you WHILE you were together ?!? Sounds like he is the one who should have guilt.
I would no longer discuss your past with him. Tell him... (read in full...)
Found naked pics of a guy on my wife's camera. I'm not sure how to handle this...
Q. My wife and I are married 4 years this summer. Everything seems to be great, my problem is something from the past. I just bought my wife a new laptop and digital camera last Christmas. Her old camera she had when we met and was about 5 or 6 yea...
A. 25 May 2011: Could it have been a friend's bachelorette party? Girls just having fun - doesn't mean she did anything other than take pictures and giggle about them. If you've ever been to a strip club - then it's the same thing.
I know for myself - in past ... (read in full...)
Why is she so guarded now?
Q. My girlfriend of the past two months used to communicate everything to me, as I do with her about her, me, and us. It was the most amazing thing when we started dating to get to know this woman so openly and freely. But now she has backed off and ...
A. 25 May 2011: You say you have "fallen madly in love" , but has she? Her behaviors are not indicating that she is madly in love with you. I'm sorry - I am NOT trying to be mean. I am madly in love with my boyfriend of five months and I text him multiple tim... (read in full...)
I want to be friends with my guy friends like we were before they got girlfriends!
Q. This situation is really upsetting to me. I'm a woman who has always gravitated to male friends. Having friends that I can share things and confide in is really important to me, and I need to have friends, but I feel that guys understand me and I ...
A. 23 May 2011: Why are you making the girlfriends out to be the bad guys here? If you are really as close to these guys as you think - they are the ones that should be maintaining the friendship with you. And if you really care about these guys as friends only - ... (read in full...)
Serious relationship question, why is he in such a rush?
Q. i was in a brief serious relationship with a guy who I had been in contact with about a year ago. just recently we became back in touch and decided to try a serious relationship. the only things was that he didn't tell me what his backgrou...
A. 18 May 2011: Yes. I would cut off contact.
Possessive and jealous = scary. It will only get worse and even when you are not doing anything wrong: he will accuse you.
Cut off contact but prepare yourself for a birrage of emials ; phone calls etc. Don't... (read in full...)
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