So why did he ask me for (not nude) pictures?
Q. Hello! I just wanted to ask for some outside advice on a guy that I recently met. I'll start at the beginning. I work in retail,and he was at my work for a couple of days selling subscriptions to our customers. Pretty much every female,including ...
A. 12 July 2011: I've done the same exact thing in similar situations. I'll meet a girl I am interested in, get her number, start conversations via text or calling, and then ask for a few pics. The reasons I do that are first so I have pics to show my friends. My ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a two-year-old to want to nap/sleep/lay on her dad's chest?
Q. Is it normal for a two year old girl to want to nap/sleep/lay on her dad's chest? She's definitely a daddy's girl but a friend of mine told me she shouldn't want to lay on him. As soon as he lays down even if she's not going down for a nap or rea...
A. 12 July 2011: This is perfectly normal. My daughter did that when she was young, and even at age 9 she sometimes likes to cuddle next to me on the couch when we watch TV. Your friend sounds like the weird one, did she not get affection as a child? Or perhaps she ... (read in full...)
BF is married and lied to me about being separated from his wife, having sex with her and having another kid that I didnt know of. Does he deserve another chance?
Q. Five months ago I met this guy who seemed like a good guy and was fun to hang around. From the first moment we met he admitted to me that he had a son who was in the first grade, and showed me pictures like any proud father. Even though I myself ...
A. 12 July 2011: You did the right thing by dumping him. Don't give him a second chance. He lied about only having one child, or at the very least misrepresented it, and he clearly has ex issues. He's a mess.
There are far better guys out there. You learned ... (read in full...)
Will he ever leave her for me or am I just being selfish ?
Q. I realize how this all sounds and I know the easy answer will be leave him; but I need some honesty. I have been dating a guy 10 yrs older than me for a year now. We met at work, planned to hook up once and that's it. Somehow once became twice, an...
A. 12 July 2011: Believe me, I know it isn't easy. In your situation you mentioned how this guy didn't even tell you he had a girlfriend until you had been with him for two months. I know it started out as a casual thing, so that's a convenient reason for him to not ... (read in full...)
Will he ever leave her for me or am I just being selfish ?
Q. I realize how this all sounds and I know the easy answer will be leave him; but I need some honesty. I have been dating a guy 10 yrs older than me for a year now. We met at work, planned to hook up once and that's it. Somehow once became twice, an...
A. 11 July 2011: Don't walk away from this guy... RUN. QUICKLY!!!
This man is a total disaster. You are frankly on the fringe of being too young for him, yet he's got a pregnant girlfriend that is 10 years younger! What a hot mess!! Let's see... he also impregna... (read in full...)
Beautiful woman extremely friendly to me at first meeting. Red flag?
Q. Right, so my mate and i were at a pub couple of nights go, and im sitting at a table, and i notice a drop dead gorgeous woman sitting with a friend. Friend goes up to go the ladies room, so gorgeous lady is sitting alone. I whisper to my mate to ...
A. 8 July 2011: I'd call her. Sometimes really attractive women are so intimidating that they get approached MUCH less than you'd expect. It could also be that she's a player, but as long as you're prepared for that going in then you can have some fun and not get ... (read in full...)
Have you never had a girlfriend because you're too picky?
Q. I have a serious question for men who have never ever had a girlfriend in their life. I'm noticing a serious pattern between you guys. Why are you guys so picky? I was playing matchmaker for some of my male "never had a gf in their life" friends and ...
A. 8 July 2011: I don't fall into the "never had a girlfriend" group, strictly speaking, as I have been married and I've also had other relationships that lasted some months. However, I have gone looooong periods of time without a girlfriend. For example, I didn't ... (read in full...)
He has a girlfriend but he's so irresistible I just can't help myself
Q. Hi everyone, after a year of this problem growing, i feel i can't quite fix this and need some advice! 2 and a half years ago i moved in with a guy, i've always considered him my flatmate even though we have an intimate relationship, we...
A. 8 July 2011: Sorry, sweetie, but the trainer is absolutely NOT "beautiful in every way, inside and out!" He's cheating on his girlfriend!!! Do you think you're the only girl he's done that with? No way! He has a system... he asked you out for a drink when get ... (read in full...)
Am I right in not wanting to be just friends with him after everything or am I just being a bitch?
Q. I ended things with a guy, after about 4 months of seeing each other, mainly because I felt he wasn't all that into me anymore and I wanted to save myself from dragging it out and ending up getting seriously hurt. He only agreed to see me when he'd ...
A. 7 July 2011: I have to agree with the anonymous female poster. This guy is not into you. I find it really unusual that you saw each other for 4 months, and even stayed over at times, and nothing sexual happened. That tells me he views you as a friend he enjoys ... (read in full...)
Now he tells me he is 'too old' to have another child. It made me wonder whether I am okay with this
Q. Hi all I have a serious question and could do with some really good advice. I'm 25 and my boyfriend is quite a bit older at 45. We love each other very much, have a great friendship aswell as relationship. I know this man is the one I want to spend...
A. 7 July 2011: I feel I need to address what I feel is some potentially inaccurate information given in a few of the responses. First, it is categorically false that an only child MUST grow up feeling lonely. There's no truth to it at all. Do some only childr... (read in full...)
I'm having sex with my best friend's married father who is 54!
Q. Basically, i am having sex with my bestfriends dad. I am 25 and he is 54. He is still married and has been for 27 years. His wife is 58 and he says she dows not share the same sexual desire as he does. It all began 3 month ago when i stumbled...
A. 7 July 2011: OP, I'm sorry but you were taken advantage of by a much older man, and are now confused. The only reason this guy is treating you nice is because he's having sex with someone less than half his age! You're nearly 30 years younger than he is! So of ... (read in full...)
I left my husband for him, but he is still living with his wife,,, What should I do now?
Q. Ive been married for 11 years and it hasn't been a perfect marriage by no means. He has been abusive and neglected me. He always did things with his friends and never with me and it got very lonely. I meet a man at work and felt an instant ...
A. 7 July 2011: So_Very_Confused is exactly right. If this guy was going to leave his wife for you he would have done it already. He hasn't, and he's never going to. If he were truly as in love as you believe, he wouldn't be able to stop himself from divorcing his ... (read in full...)
How would a man behave if he were conflicted with choosing between his new life, new woman and his old life, wife & kids?
Q. How would a man behave if he were conflicted with choosing between his new life, new woman and his old life/wife and kids? I would really appreciate hearing from actual men how they would handle this sort of decision. Additionally, I am nothing ...
A. 6 July 2011: As a divorced man with a child, I don't have any conflict. None at all. Once I made the decision to pursue a divorce that was it... I was moving on. I do not in any way desire getting back with my ex, or living my old life. I DO miss coming home to ... (read in full...)
My virgin husband is making me get an std test before he will marry me...
Q. My fiance is making me get an STD test before he marries me. He is a virgin and I'm not. I have been with 2 guys before him. He told me he just wants to be sure I am clean before he marries me because he does not want to catch an std. He is ...
A. 6 July 2011: I'll add another "get tested" response. You're fiance is just being cautious, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. You've had two partners, so you *could* have an STD. There's no harm nor any insult in getting tested to prove you are ... (read in full...)
I left my husband for him, but he is still living with his wife,,, What should I do now?
Q. Ive been married for 11 years and it hasn't been a perfect marriage by no means. He has been abusive and neglected me. He always did things with his friends and never with me and it got very lonely. I meet a man at work and felt an instant ...
A. 6 July 2011: To answer your questions:
"How do I make this happen?" You CANNOT! Period. End of story. Nobody can make someone else do ANYTHING. If this guy is going to leave his wife for you, he will have to make that decision on his own. The absolute most you... (read in full...)
Sex with a high class prostitute
Q. Is that less reprehensible? It is interesting to see how people judge prostitutes very harshly and yet someone who has lots of casual sex, one night stands and has a very high number is not considered trashy, just living their life. I guess wh...
A. 6 July 2011: In my view, a prostitute is a prostitute. It doesn't matter if she's working a corner in the ghetto, or if she's a high dollar escort that works in penthouses and on yachts... the bottom line is she's selling her body for money. End of story. It's ... (read in full...)
What am I trying to convince myself of?
Q. I need some advice really quick, because i am seeing this guy tomorrow and i think i made a drunken mistake last week! I want to sort out what to do, I don't know whether i should stop things before they go further! Basically he has liked me for...
A. 6 July 2011: It sounds to me like you should give him a chance. He's honest, you find him funny and the two of you get on well... to me that's a budding relationship.
I really like that he wanted to make sure you were sober and of sound mind before he pursued ... (read in full...)
This guy just wont leave me alone!!
Q. Hey so I was at a festival and some guy asked me for my number. Being stupid... I gave it to him. At first it was cute but now he will not stop texting me and calling! I told my parents because hes freaking me out so I told him that i was getting my ...
A. 6 July 2011: I think if you just ignore him, he will eventually lose interest and disappear.... (read in full...)
My ex husband of 5 years won't take no for an answer, how can I get him to stop trying to have sex with me?
Q. My ex husband and I get along very well as parents. We have been apart for 5 years. I am in a serious relationship with another man. Several times since we parted he has come onto me sexually and I have told him no, that it isn't gonna happen. Once ...
A. 6 July 2011: My advice is to not put yourself in a situation where you're alone with him. When you're trading off the kids, or when you attend a function for your children, I'd make sure to have your boyfriend, a friend, or even one of your parents with you. ... (read in full...)
Oral sex tips?
Q. help can anyone give me some oral sex tips i never get my husband to ejaculate during oral sex help anyone...
A. 6 July 2011: I have to agree with the second anonymous poster. There are some guys, I'm one of them, who just aren't into oral enough to get off from it. It feels great and I would never decline a lover's offer to give me oral, but I have only experienced ONE ... (read in full...)
10 Situations that Scream, "He's a Player!"
Q. Happy New Year! I hope all of you enjoyed a very Happy New year and that you have stuck to the resolutions that you made during this period. I simply hope that your resolution for the New Year wasn't to give up on men because by condemning all men ...
A. 24 June 2011: Some of these are definitely signs of a player. Lesson #6 and #8 in particular are player warning signs. However, there are some big player signs that this article misses, and some of the items here aren't necessarily signs of a player at all. ... (read in full...)
Is dating a younger guy difficult? Would this explain why he broke up with me?
Q. Hi I am dating a guy 6 years younger to me for the past 2 months. At first i was reluctant and he was the one keep on insisting and then we went for a date and it went well and we started seeing each other. Suddenly 2 days back he starte...
A. 22 June 2011: I agree with SVC. I think the biggest issue is that he's quite young. Doing the math, he's in the 20-23 year old bracket. At that age, and being a guy, it is not surprising if he wasn't looking for a serious relationship.
It's also possible... (read in full...)
I don't understand why my friend still texts him
Q. My best friend met this guy who she thought was 23/24 and he thought she was 26. So they both assumed without knowing. When really he is 28 nearly 29 and she is 18. Does anyone else find it weird that someone his age and hers are texting each other? ...
A. 3 June 2011: I agree completely with Cerberus. I'm in my mid 30's, and in the last year I've dated a few different women between the ages of 22 and 24. 11 or 12 years is not really a huge age gap. It's a little bigger of a gap when the girl is only 18 verses say ... (read in full...)
Guys: Do you all want a younger woman?
Q. Guys, tell the truth, do you REALLY want a younger woman than the one you are with now? I am in a relationship with a man 15 years my senior. The other day I asked him if he woud date a woman in her 40s he said no, in her 30s he said no (even...
A. 30 April 2011: You're always going to be 15 years younger than this guy, so I don't see where he will necessarily feel the urge to drop you for someone even younger. However, there is some key information missing. You've been together quite a while, 5 years now. ... (read in full...)
How should my friend go about having a relationship with a younger man?
Q. dear cupid, my girlfriend does not have a computer and she needs some good advice. she is single 42, and the younger guys seen to be attracted to her. from 22 to 34. she wanted to no if that is ok.? she is seeing a 27 year old right now. he has a ...
A. 30 April 2011: I'm thinking exactly the opposite of what breadtotoast wrote. He's 27 and she's 42... sorry, that's a booty call. In fact, this woman has already established herself as a booty call. She had him over twice for sex and they haven't gone on a single ... (read in full...)
The fact that my GF was not a virgin when she met me, is breaking me down.I cant handle this relationship anymore...
Q. Ive being going out with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and early on in the relationship i found she wasnt a virgin. This was painful for me to hear for two reasons: 1-I belive that you should lose your virginity to someone you love and want...
A. 30 April 2011: For a moment let's forget the specifics about your girlfriend. The fact is, every girl you meet is going to have some history. People have sex. It is enjoyable and natural, and we all gain sexual experience in our own way. Sometimes people come to ... (read in full...)
Is my husband's relationship with his co-worker appropriate? Or am I over reacting?
Q. I am 61 and my husband is 68. For the past year he has had a close relationship friends he says with a co worker. He lies when she calls because he knows I think it is inappropriate. He hides her number in his cell phone and on one occasion ...
A. 30 April 2011: No, you're not overreacting at all. Your husband is clearly crossing the line with his coworker, and it doesn't really matter if they have a physical relationship because at the very least he is emotionally cheating on you. Hiding her number, lying ... (read in full...)
Guys do you prefer to approach or be approached?
Q. On a night out what do you think of a girl that makes the first move to approach a guy? Do guys prefer to approach the girl themselves?...
A. 22 March 2011: I'll be perfectly honest - the majority of guys who encounter an assertive girl will assume that she is "easy". So they'll be more than happy to go home with a girl like that or exchange phone numbers with her, but they are also likely to only view ... (read in full...)
Does anyone think he loves me?
Q. ok , so after my divorce in 2004 , me and a long time friend who was divorcing too . started to sleep together the first time once , did not see him for 9 months he called apologized and said i did not deserve that , we got to gather a few times a ...
A. 14 March 2011: After reading all of the OP's posts and the advice given by everyone, I have two things I feel are worth sharing. First, OP - I know this has been very difficult for you emotionally, but I strongly advise against your plan to share everything... (read in full...)
Condom before or after foreplay?
Q. Just a quick question: when engaging with your partner, should men put a condom on before foreplay or after? ...
A. 14 March 2011: I always put the condom on after foreplay, and if I'm being honest I have to admit that I basically don't wear one for oral sex - just for intercourse. Why? Because many STD's cannot be transmitted from oral sex, and obviously there's no risk of ... (read in full...)
Has having multiple sex partners before marriage affected your relationship with your spouse?
Q. Hi, so we read here on Dear Cupid a lot about people having jealousy over the number of sex partners their husbands or wives have had. But this question is a little different. It is for those married people who in their single days had multiple sex ...
A. 18 February 2011: I don't believe emotional compatibility is adversely effected by having many sexual partners. The caveat is that one night stands aren't going to have any benefit when it comes to one's emotional maturity. Those are physical encounters and nothing ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with my older girlfriend? Or should I break up with her and go for the other girl?
Q. Hi, I really need help with an issue that I suppose has been going on for a while now. The answer may be really easy but I just don't know what to do. I have been in a relationship with an older woman for the last 3 years. She is 12 years older t...
A. 18 February 2011: I have to agree with TEM. My ex-wife is 5 years older than I am, and even that much of an age gap was a problem in the relationship. In my case it wasn't so much an issue of attraction, but it was about how she treated me and looked down upon me. It ... (read in full...)
Has having multiple sex partners before marriage affected your relationship with your spouse?
Q. Hi, so we read here on Dear Cupid a lot about people having jealousy over the number of sex partners their husbands or wives have had. But this question is a little different. It is for those married people who in their single days had multiple sex ...
A. 15 February 2011: I think it can improve a marriage. Someone who has a lot of experience with sex tends to know what they like and what they don't like, and also how to please their partner. Those circumstances should make the fun between the sheets all that much ... (read in full...)
She's keeping me at arm's length. am I wasting my time?
Q. I am 41 and I am sort of seeing a 24 year old woman. We both have feeling for each other, but she's scared to be comitted. She says she's scared she'll hurt me, or if things didn't work out that it would be hard to face each other in work. She'...
A. 15 February 2011: I recently found myself in a similar situation. I'm 34, and was seeing a coworker who is 22. I think the biggest thing here is the woman's age. At 22 or 24, many women today are not even close to settling down. They are young and carefree, and ... (read in full...)
Girls, how should I play this now?
Q. Hi Guys, On new years eve, I was at a friends party and ended up sitting next to a girl that I know of, but hadn't spoken to before, I'd always thought that she was a good looking girl but haven't had a chance/need to speak to her before. But w...
A. 15 February 2011: Well, you've expressed interest and made an attempt to contact her. That's really all you can do. The ball is clearly in her court, so if the interest is mutual then it is her turn to make the next move. If you make further attempts then you ... (read in full...)
Do ultra thin condoms break more easily?
Q. dear readers, i wanted to know if you use ultra thin condoms does it make them brake easier? are the chances higher? please tell me if this is so cus i want to try them but i dont want to make the risk higher?...
A. 11 February 2011: In my experience, thickness and quality are not related (and really, durability is a function of quality). Some of the best condoms are in fact ultra thin.... (read in full...)
I'm unsure about settling down with him, and he has kids. How do I handle this situation?
Q. I'm in a situation and I don't know what to do for best. I would like to hear from any parents here... To start, I'm 20 years old and have been in a relationship with a guy of 32 (33 next month) for just over a year. I do love him but I'm unsu...
A. 11 February 2011: I think Cerberus was a little off on his view of the relationship between children and the people their parents date. I've been on my own for almost two years now, and in that time I have only introduced one woman I've dated to my daughter. I have ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend and her male friend are too close for comfort in my eyes and I don't know how to deal with it anymore!
Q. I have been dating my girlfriend for a year and a half now, and just recently have been realizing the magnitude of her relationship with her male friend. He is living in North Carolina and we are in Arizona. They have been friends longer than we ...
A. 11 February 2011: I'm cool with the girls I'm dating having guy friends that they hang out with, but to me this sounds over the line. It is too close.
However, you've brought it up and she has drawn a line in the sand. You have to decide if you can accept this rel... (read in full...)
She cheated on all her ex's - will she cheat on me?
Q. Right here we go I've been dating this girl for a good year now and as far as our interactions with each other are concerned all is going swimmingly. Im in my mid 20's and this is my first serious relationship as I knew throughout my "silly" years ...
A. 11 February 2011: I wish I had something more positive to say, but the harsh reality is I've been badly burned by women who have a history of cheating. I don't think they change. If she cheated on her ex's, particularly THREE of them, then you will be in constant ... (read in full...)
I'm in a relationship, he's married with 3 kids but he's everything I've been looking for!
Q. Okay... Well... Here's the thing. I met this great guy six months ago who is cute, funny, smart, great personality, everything I was looking for in a guy. The only problem is, I'm in a relationship, an he's married with three kids. He told me he ...
A. 11 February 2011: Yes, I have to say you were duped. The vast majority of married men will not leave their wife and family. They just want a little action on the side, and will say just about anything to get it.
It is in everyone's best interest if you move on ... (read in full...)
Husband has no interest in having sex with ANYONE!
Q. Dear Cupid, Seems like the question has been asked before....but for whatever reason I feel my situation is different. I have been with my husband for almost 5 years now...we had a long distance relationship and of course when we saw each other w...
A. 11 February 2011: Is this guy a lot older, or under a lot of stress at work? Something sounds off to me. I'm struggling to understand why a guy would go from a sex machine to completely uninterested in it.... (read in full...)
I'm unsure about settling down with him, and he has kids. How do I handle this situation?
Q. I'm in a situation and I don't know what to do for best. I would like to hear from any parents here... To start, I'm 20 years old and have been in a relationship with a guy of 32 (33 next month) for just over a year. I do love him but I'm unsu...
A. 11 February 2011: As a single parent with primary custody of an 8 year old, I have to tell you that the kids are part of the package. If you truly love this man, then taking on the role of step-mom is not an option - it is part of the deal. I understand your ... (read in full...)
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