Boyfriend cannot express his emotional needs and its driving me away!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a few years but have only recently lived together. Up until lately we have been doing very well 99% of the time. We have strong feelings for each other and are an ideal couple. I am 28 and he is a few years youn...
A. 23 February 2014: Firstly... he is not going to change. Because you have asked him to change and he hasn't. And you've also not followed through on your threat to leave him. So in his eyes, he can do what he wants and get away with it. I say 'get away with it' ... (read in full...)
3 month anniversary post on girlfriend's wall. What do I say?
Q. My three month anniversary with my girlfriend is today. She has asked me to post a long post on her wall. We have been through alot together and really are thinking about the future together. What do I say. Please help.. I need help fast I am ...
A. 23 February 2014: I agree with the other poster... Please don't post something on her wall! I find it very immature and very strange that she would request this.
Why not write her a nice message in a pretty card, just saying how much you like her and what the rela... (read in full...)
Does having anal sex make me no longer a virgin?
Q. I pledged not to lose my virginity until marrige but it has been hard with my kind of personality seeing naked guys and me getting wet. All the thoughts about having sex. I have a guy in my house currently and he has been here for over a week. At ...
A. 22 February 2014: I don't know about others, but I would not class you as a virgin.
I don't think you can keep yourself for your husband and still have anal sex. How would you like it if your husband told you HE was a virgin, but then you found out he'd had anal... (read in full...)
Have I said too much too soon? Or should I be more frank with him?
Q. I am 24 years old and I struggle to act interested in guys. I have friends who are so full on with guys and scare them away that i try my best not to be like this and act uninterested usually. I work with a guy I really like who is professional but ...
A. 22 February 2014: You have put yourself out there and now it is his turn to make a move. Don't try and go after him again, he knows you like him so now it is down to him.
If it was me I would have been flattered and not at all freaked out. But if I liked you back... (read in full...)
My ex who tried to ruin my relationship has contacted me. I don't want to hurt her, but I don't want to hurt my partner. What should I do?
Q. Me and my ex broke up back in June after being together for a year and a half. We tried being friends but this proved impossible after I started seeing someone four months later. This lead to something of a bitter parting for us. She and her family ...
A. 21 February 2014: Do not contact your ex.
It will hurt your girlfriend when she finds out.
It will hurt your ex, because she might think she has a chance with you or that you do want to be friends and try and stay in contact.
It will hurt you when you h... (read in full...)
S true love real or do you think people generally 'settle' with a nice partner?
Q. Hi everyone, I have posted about this previously but I'm still in the same predicament. Basically, I am currently dating a lovely guy but I'm really unsure of my feelings for him. We met online but decided to be friends (he was keen, I didn't feel ...
A. 21 February 2014: My advice: don't settle. I was with my ex for five years and would have married her, but it would have been the biggest mistake of my life because I would have settled. No matter how well we got on, or loved each others family, or what values w... (read in full...)
I cheated - is there any way to fix this?
Q. So I've been dating my boyfriend that's about 8 years older than me for over two years now. For the last six months or so, I feel like our relationship has been quite stale and stagnate. I have learned to accept this because he is in his 30s and I'm ...
A. 19 February 2014: I cheated on an ex in almost identical circumstances... And it was the end of our relationship, even if it took us another two years to break up. I was exactly the same, I didn't even really feel guilty, but my difference was I told her straight ... (read in full...)
Can't get a job without experience, no experience without a job.
Q. Not particularly a relationship question but its really dragging me down. I graduated from university in 2012 and haven't been able to find a job. I did a business management degree and I don;t expect to walk into a higher end job or management ...
A. 4 February 2014: I was in a very similar situation. I know this is probably not what you want to hear, but I think for now your best bet is to get a full time job in retail. I would look at retail banking, then the step into admin is considerably easier.
The m... (read in full...)
Girlfriend keeps pressuring me to perform oral and I hate it.
Q. I don't know how to say all this without coming out like an asshole but please hear me out. My girlfriend keeps pressuring me to go down on her because she goes down on me but I really don't want to. I've tried it before with several girls ...
A. 31 January 2014: I completely agree with llifton, it just sounds as if you're not ready for sex. Your post is quite defensive and you come across as immature. Generally, women find it hard to orgasm through penetration, so oral and fingering are an important par... (read in full...)
My first love is back in the picture and I'm torn ...
Q. Sorry for the essay but I don't know what's the right thing to do, I've never been in this situation before and I don't want to make the wrong decision. Last night something that I've wanted for so long happened and it couldn't be worse timing! ...
A. 28 January 2014: I'm sorry to have to agree with the others. I read your post and straight away thought 'this is bull' ...and why did I think that? Because I have been THAT guy. I dated this girl a good few years ago now. We were together for about a year m... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend insecure or just clingy?
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for about two years, and at first things were great, we got on really well, had mutual interests and everything seemed great. As of late however, he has become more and more clingy and moody. He was studying abroad ...
A. 27 January 2014: He sounds extremely possessive, which is a side effect of being insecure. He also sounds very immature, like he has a lot of growing up to do.
His behaviour isn't really acceptable, I'm sure most people would feel smothered by him, and I think it... (read in full...)
She has a boyfriend but tells me her relationship is falling apart! Should I make a move?
Q. Hi! A year ago I posted here with regards to the break-up from hell. Well, I can safely say 12 months later that's all in the past Moved on with my life and it's all going well. So there's this new girl. Problem is... she has a boyfriend. Yep, ...
A. 19 January 2014: I don't want to be harsh, but I'm not that convinced she's into you. She knows you like her and I would suspect that she likes the attention and that is the extent of it. But if she was into you, regardless of whether this other guy is her first... (read in full...)
I don't know how to handle my boyfriend's abusive behavior anymore!
Q. Dear Cupid Im with my current bf for almost 4 years, its the longest relationship for both of us. My bf was previously with lots of girls nothing lasted even for 6 months. Coming to my problem, he often becomes abusive, im not even sure whats ...
A. 11 January 2014: Please, please don't think you need to 'handle' this. You need to leave. He is abusive and he is not going to change. It is not acceptable for him to threaten you, no matter what the reason is. I know when you are in a relationship it is hard, but ... (read in full...)
I met a guy online and he kept on postponing because of back problems. Should I wait it out?
Q. Hi guys, I have come looking for advice, just slightly confused about a sitaution .So a while ago I decided to give online dating a go. I met this guy online. We hit it from the start.Its been five months and we speak everyday, skype text etc.....
A. 29 December 2013: Does no one else watch Catfish?! Google it and watch it if not.
He is making excuses not to meet you. Whether they are based on truth or not, it does not matter. If you had met through friends and then he didn't want to meet up, you wouldn't... (read in full...)
Am I just being paranoid about this long distance association?
Q. I have a long distance partner who I met on my holidays a while ago. I'm from England and he is from Wales. I really love this guy, he's funny, charming, very attractive and honestly I love spending time with him. The hitch is, I find it really h...
A. 23 December 2013: If he has given you no reason to suspect he would cheat, other than his past, then I would trust him.
I know it is easier said than done, but you can't hold his past against him. Maybe he did mess around... Now he has found the right woman he... (read in full...)
I promised my girlfriend to never kiss or do anything sexual with her or masturbate, any comments?
Q. I have no idea what to do or dont do. I made a few promises to my girlfriend and two of them are to never do anything sexual to her (including kissing) and never masterbate. Since my girlfriend thinks sex is gross and painful, I respected her ...
A. 22 December 2013: If someone I was dating when I was your age had said to me 'I never want any sexual contact, not even kissing' I would have said 'ok, it was nice knowing you' and ran for the hills. I'm not too concerned with the sex, you're too young for that a... (read in full...)
He was still trying to see me while he has a girlfriend!
Q. I was dating my ex for 3 months, I broke it off with him. While I was being completely honest, faithful and trustworthy in the relationship he was not, he lied to me about not having social media sites and I basically caught him lying, not to ...
A. 21 December 2013: I don't think you should text him. Your relationship has ended and you have already told him how you felt. He doesn't deserve anymore of your time.
Even if you want to, try not to. He may see it as an invitation to try pursuing you again, b... (read in full...)
I feel uncomfortable that my B/f''s ex is still a part of his little sisters life as well as his
Q. Wondering what people think of this because I find it kind of odd. I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months. My boyfriend has a little sister who is 5. When him and his ex girlfriend dated for 2 years, she became really close to his littl...
A. 21 December 2013: This is hard. I have got lots of nieces and nephews between the ages of 1 and 8 and they became very close to my ex, he was great with kids and became a big part of their life, we often looked after them together. When we broke up and he wasn't ... (read in full...)
I don't know how to save our relationship!
Q. Dear Cupid I am with my bf for 3 years. I am still not feeling secured in the relationship, he often throws words like im bored with u, i would like to take a break, i would like to hug my boss (lady) very tight, my lady boss has big b..bs, thing...
A. 20 December 2013: Firstly, his behaviour is not really acceptable. He's not treating you well at all, you deserve better.
I think he has already mentally ended the relationship with you unfortunately and I don't think you can save it.
I think it might be best... (read in full...)
How am I supposed to act now that we're dating?
Q. Hey guys, I could really do with some insight into my dilemma! I've been best friends with my best guy friend for many years, and it's clear that we're inseparable. He's a little older than me, but this has never effected our relationshi...
A. 20 December 2013: ...'we'd fallen in love with eachother but it was best for our friendship if we were to just stay friends' ...I'm sorry, I don't understand this. If you were in love with each other, why would you worry about your friendship? Surely you'd be more ... (read in full...)
He said he would have to think about whether he was serious about a relationship at all, now I'm confused about how to handle this!
Q. I met this guy online, we dated for for about 3 mos...and he honored my request to take it slow.. cos i really liked him and he likes me too.We would talk for hours..have intimate conversations and made out few times.He asked me if I would get ...
A. 20 December 2013: You have put the ball in his court and now it is up to him. There's not much you can do.
In my opinion, three months is not too soon to have brought up the issue of how serious your relationship is. All you can do now is wait for him to decide..... (read in full...)
He says his use of gay sex sites is an addiction
Q. I'm engaged to this really wonderful man. We've been in a relationship for 2 years and counting. We hit off really well as a couple and have had really good times together. The problem started when I discovered that he had online sex chats with ...
A. 19 December 2013: I agreed with Owl and Confused. He is lying about his sexuality to you and himself. What will happen when you get married and he does it again? Because he will, you've forgiven him 2 times, maybe a third... Why would he stop if you keep on lett... (read in full...)
I feel so used -- he dropped me as soon as we slept together
Q. Hello, I understand this is probably a trivial and common question, but it is really getting me down as this has never happened to me before. I met this guy and we got talking, we had a in depth conversation and he was really sweet. We changed ...
A. 18 December 2013: I don't think the lesson you should take away from this is "don't sleep with someone too soon" ...it should be "some guys are arse holes"
I would not recommend withholding sex to try and earn 'respect' or just for the sake of it... If you waited u... (read in full...)
He wants to go "no contact" after our breakup but the pain is unbearable for me
Q. hello, I need some advise. I am in the in the mids of breaking up with my bf with whom I am with for 4 years. Is there anyone there who could help me lessen the pain a bit? I have read everywhere that the no contact rule should be applied but I do...
A. 15 December 2013: Did I miss it in your post? Why are you breaking up? He asked you not to contact him... And you should ask him to do the same. It really is the easiest way. It doesn't work for everyone, but I agreed with an ex that we wouldn't contact each ot... (read in full...)
I kissed another man, now my husband wants to sleep with someone to "get even"
Q. I've been married for 3 years and together for 6. I love my husband but we have had our issues in the past I cheated on him 6 months into our relationship by kissing another man he also touched my breasts. Nothing else happened and all contact with ...
A. 15 December 2013: I think you should just say... "Errr... no."
I agree with everyone else. Revenge in any form is unnecessary and does more damage than good. You were honest at the start, he can't hold it against you after so long.
I can't believe that he ... (read in full...)
How much fighting is too much?
Q. Hi everyone. I'm writing to ask your opinion on how much fighting is too much. I've been with my current boyfriend for just over a year, and I think he is the man I will spend my life with. In general, we get along very well, and we never have had ...
A. 15 December 2013: I agree with the previous post, it really depends on the subject of the arguments... Are they about silly things or more important things?
Are either of you under any extra stress? Have you spoken to him about it? It might just be a phase, h... (read in full...)
I'm thinking of divorcing my wife because she isn't pretty enough
Q. I will be as honest as I can, so i can have some honest responses.I need some suggestion from people who are on the same shoes or from anyone. I have been married for 3 years. I am 26 and my wife is 24. In my opinion i think my wife looks 6/10....
A. 15 December 2013: Who cares if she's 'pretty' or not? Everyone has different interpretations on what is 'pretty'. What should matter is if you are attracted to her... and you're not. It's not fair to lead her on, she deserves to be with a man who DOES find her ... (read in full...)
He won't clarify what I am to him after 3.5 months together. Should this be a deal breaker?
Q. I've been dating this guy for about 3 and a half months now, and so far it's been really great for the most part. He's a really sweet guy, and he treats me really well. We hang out a few times a week and we talk everyday. He's met a lot of my ...
A. 14 December 2013: I don't think you should put pressure on him to put a label on your relationship, it will push him away and he may feel like you forced him into it if he DOES agree.
BUT. I don't think it is unreasonable to want commitment from him, when is he go... (read in full...)
I feel I'm at my emotional limit with this relationship
Q. I need some help and advice with a relatively new relationship I'm in. The relationship started out complicated but that in itself is a very long story so I'm hoping I can escape going into that. Basically, we got together in September and ev...
A. 14 December 2013: At first, I didn't read your whole post. I got to the 4th paragraph and thought that you need to get out of this.
Then I read the fifth paragraph. You DEFINITELY need to get out of this abusive relationship. He should NEVER physically hurt you... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is friends with this girl who sleeps around with almost everyone and I'm scared that he might cheat on me
Q. I just found out that my boyfriend is friends with this girl who sleeps around with almost everyone !! He cheated on me before, although that was a year ago. We broke up and got back together, and now I'm afraid that he has or will do somethin...
A. 14 December 2013: I wouldn't worry too much about her, I'd worry about HIM. It is his choice if he cheats.
If they're not close, I wouldn't worry too much... But as he cheated before, he really should reassure you.
Understandably you have trouble trusting... (read in full...)
Is he just being stubborn or does he just want to remain friends?
Q. I was seeing a guy for a good two months and we were fab together. Always laughing, had loadz fun together, both felt the same, couldnt get enough of each other. I started to get really strong feelings for him to which he reciprocated by telling me ...
A. 14 December 2013: I think he does like you and he wants to keep you sweet so if he changes his mind he can come back to you and/or sleep with you when he wants. I don't think he's being stubborn at all. I think he is keeping his options open so that if someone else ... (read in full...)
Please help - I found dodgy photos on my boyfriend's computer.
Q. Hi everyone, I'm a bit confused and any insight would be appreciated as I can't talk to anyone else about this. My boyfriend is a sweet guy, I always knew he had a Pervy side but all guys do and that didn't really bother me.... Until I found pic...
A. 10 December 2013: "He is violating women's privacy for power"
This is the main thing. That is not acceptable behaviour.
For your own mental wellbeing, I think you need to leave. Won't you just be worrying about what else he's been up to and/or will get up to no... (read in full...)
Feeling guilty that I broke up with my boyfriend so close to Christmas!
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend, of 3 years, yesterday. He'd been emotionally abandoning me for quite some time and we'd been having problems the last few months that we couldn't get past. I told him time and time again that I wouldn't keep "waiting" ...
A. 7 December 2013: Firstly... you have done the right thing.
Don't feel bad, as you said, he mistreated you and you needed to end the relationship. You haven't hurt him... you have only hurt yourself by staying so long.
It will get better, just focus on yoursel... (read in full...)
Are there any people in relationships who have sex rarely and are HAPPY?
Q. I'm really curious about this...I've been hearing people talk about asexual relationships recently, and it gave me the idea to ask something a little less extreme. Are there any people who are in happy relationships, but they have sex infrequently ...
A. 7 December 2013: I think if BOTH partners are 'vanilla' and just want missionary sex once a fortnight then yes, it can work.
If one partner wants that and the other wants more, then probably not. One person in the relationship will always end up doing somethin... (read in full...)
Does this girl like me?
Q. Does this girl like me. We spend a lot of time together and we get along verry well. We have symillar intrests and she atends quite a few clubs i do. She even started atending a couple that i told her i did. About a week ago we went to see a movie ...
A. 5 December 2013: I would think yes! It's very positive that she seems to be making an effort to spend time with you. Ask if she wants to do something just the two of you and take it from there. ... (read in full...)
I have become attracted to someone else and it's changing the way I feel about my boyfriend!
Q. I've been in a relationship for about 5/6 months now, but recently I've been having a dilemma. My boyfriend is lovely and sweet and I'm not unhappy in my relationship but neither am I happy. I just feel a bit bored and sometimes it feels like we are ...
A. 4 December 2013: 5/6 months is still really the honeymoon period. If you're not into him now, then I don't really see the point.
Even if there wasn't another man, I'd suggest thinking about ending it. It's not fair to your boyfriend if you've got this 'amazing... (read in full...)
Am I being unreasonable to want to keep this friendship? Or is my boyfriend right?
Q. Ok I have an issue with my live-in boyfriend (of 5 years) that I need some advice on please. I have a female friend at work. We work in the same department and we have become quite close and have started seeing each other outside of work a bit to...
A. 24 November 2013: I think HE is being unreasonable. She's your friend, it is your choice if you want to keep the friendship or not. My girlfriend has some friends that have made dreadful decisions - affairs, constant cheating, staying in abusive relationships et... (read in full...)
How can I get my parents to allow me to close the door to my room when my boyfriend comes visiting? We need our privacy!!
Q. Hi all, I have been with my bf for a few months and recently I invited my bf to meet my parents. What irks me is that I am not allowed to close the door when I am alone with him in my room. We don't always on the airconditioner but sometimes we do. ...
A. 24 November 2013: Honestly, I don't think you can. Just out of respect for them, if they've asked you not to do something in their house, then try not to do it. Just keep the door as close to being shut as possible. It psychological anyway, if the door is pulled t... (read in full...)
Don't want to miss out on the opportunity but afraid I'll develop feelings for him
Q. Hi, just asking for your opinion. There is this 50's plus amazing guy at work. He is one of those rare types who attract young girls, more than guys their own age! At work, every and I mean literally every girl would do anything to go out with him(I ...
A. 24 November 2013: I'm not entirely sure why you're contemplating this. You seem sensible enough to not have run into this and I don't think it is the best idea. I think you should steer clear. If you want something from the relationship that he can't (or rather... (read in full...)
Girlfriend says she wants to sow her wild oats
Q. I have been with the most wonderful girl for 3 years now. She is a good complement to me and I to her. We moved in together 2 years ago and we have talked of marriage and having a family. However, there is a problem and that is that our sex lif...
A. 24 November 2013: Firstly, I think you are being pretty calm and extremely understanding about all of this. If my girlfriend said this to me I'd be absolutely heartbroken. The reason she was upset when you challenged her about it because she realised just ho... (read in full...)
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